1
00:00:02,169 --> 00:00:04,837
You taking up tennis?
No, it's an electric flyswatter.

2
00:00:04,839 --> 00:00:06,239
I want to see it work.
Well, we need a fly.

3
00:00:06,241 --> 00:00:08,141
I've been waiting
all morning.

4
00:00:08,143 --> 00:00:10,343
Did you honestly
just kill one?

5
00:00:10,345 --> 00:00:12,679
Hey, what's going on, guys?
Ooh! Ah!

6
00:00:12,681 --> 00:00:14,380
Walk with dignity,
you giant toddler.
Come on,

7
00:00:14,382 --> 00:00:17,183
Schmidt, you got to get
this stuff out of here, man.

8
00:00:17,185 --> 00:00:18,985
Yeah, well, I can't afford
storage. All my money's tied up

9
00:00:18,987 --> 00:00:21,221
In the storefront
I leased for jess' sister.

10
00:00:21,223 --> 00:00:24,190
So why don't you put your junk
in the storefront, schmidt?

11
00:00:24,192 --> 00:00:25,558
You really want me
to put an ian schrager rug

12
00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:27,260
In a room
without climate control?

13
00:00:27,262 --> 00:00:28,695
What? Oh,

14
00:00:28,697 --> 00:00:30,196
He was the guy in star wars.

15
00:00:30,198 --> 00:00:32,098
Medium talent.

16
00:00:32,100 --> 00:00:33,866
Hey, guys. Morning.
Hey, jess.
Hey.

17
00:00:33,868 --> 00:00:36,769
Come on, coach! Let's hustle!

18
00:00:36,771 --> 00:00:39,339
I got coach a job at the school,
and it's his first day.

19
00:00:40,441 --> 00:00:41,774
I don't like kids,

20
00:00:41,776 --> 00:00:43,076
I don't like teaching,

21
00:00:43,078 --> 00:00:44,711
I just like paychecks.

22
00:00:44,713 --> 00:00:46,346
Well, I think
you're gonna love it.

23
00:00:46,348 --> 00:00:47,914
I don't think I'm gonna love it.

24
00:00:49,583 --> 00:00:54,220
Run! Do not stop running or I
will eat your faces and bodies!

25
00:00:54,222 --> 00:00:57,290
Keep running
or I will murder your family!

26
00:00:58,259 --> 00:01:00,593
I love this job.

27
00:01:00,595 --> 00:01:02,362
You're pissing me off!
This one.

28
00:01:02,364 --> 00:01:04,230
This one. I got my eye on you.

29
00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:15,908
Thanks for helping me
move my stuff, you guys.
♪ lots of

30
00:01:18,280 --> 00:01:20,747
Almost below you now, nick.

31
00:01:20,749 --> 00:01:23,616
Fellow passengers, stuck
in the caboose of life.

32
00:01:23,618 --> 00:01:25,785
You think I'm in the caboose
of life?

33
00:01:25,787 --> 00:01:27,287
You love it in the caboose,
not me.

34
00:01:27,289 --> 00:01:29,589
It hurts.
It's actually quite jarring.

35
00:01:31,626 --> 00:01:33,493
I don't love it in the caboose.
♪ yes, he does.

36
00:01:33,495 --> 00:01:35,295
Uh, hi. Are you guys open?

37
00:01:35,297 --> 00:01:36,796
Oh, this actually...
It's not a store.

38
00:01:36,798 --> 00:01:38,431
Oh. That's too bad.

39
00:01:38,433 --> 00:01:39,999
I really
like that lamp.
You like...

40
00:01:40,001 --> 00:01:42,068
You like the lamp? I'm sorry.
You know what, it just...

41
00:01:42,070 --> 00:01:44,404
It's just that... It doesn't...
It doesn't feel like a store yet

42
00:01:44,406 --> 00:01:46,339
Is what I meant to say.
Piano player
is a nice touch.

43
00:01:46,341 --> 00:01:48,808
Aw, thank you very much.
He's lovely, isn't he?

44
00:01:48,810 --> 00:01:50,310
Pl-please look around.
Feel free.

45
00:01:50,312 --> 00:01:52,945
The lamp is 100% full price.

46
00:01:52,947 --> 00:01:55,315
Uh, pretty much everything's
100% full price.
What you're doing

47
00:01:55,317 --> 00:01:58,184
Is illegal. You can't say
this is a store.

48
00:01:58,186 --> 00:01:59,752
I'm not taking advice
from you— you pronounce

49
00:01:59,754 --> 00:02:01,120
The "g" in "lasagna."

50
00:02:01,122 --> 00:02:02,922
Lasag-na.

51
00:02:05,026 --> 00:02:08,261
Oh, my god.
I think my arm's broken.

52
00:02:08,263 --> 00:02:11,264
I'm gonna sue the crap out
of you.

53
00:02:12,267 --> 00:02:14,634
Winston! Quiet.

54
00:02:14,636 --> 00:02:16,836
So, I have jamal chambers
in my fourth period,

55
00:02:16,838 --> 00:02:18,938
And he cannot stop
talking about how fun

56
00:02:18,940 --> 00:02:22,141
And enthusiastic
his new volleyball coach was.

57
00:02:22,143 --> 00:02:23,643
You were right. I love this job.

58
00:02:23,645 --> 00:02:25,445
I knew it. I knew you'd love it.

59
00:02:25,447 --> 00:02:27,313
Hey.
I was looking for you.

60
00:02:27,315 --> 00:02:30,149
You weren't in my car.
Internet's down.

61
00:02:30,151 --> 00:02:31,951
Okay, um, well, I
rebooted the router.

62
00:02:31,953 --> 00:02:34,354
You're actually
on the wrong ip address, so...

63
00:02:34,356 --> 00:02:35,388
There you go.

64
00:02:35,390 --> 00:02:36,989
Ooh. You know

65
00:02:36,991 --> 00:02:39,492
I can see everything
that you search for, right?

66
00:02:39,494 --> 00:02:42,662
I'm a biology teacher.
It's all research.

67
00:02:42,664 --> 00:02:45,665
Fixing computers and stuff now?
I'm just taking on
a little extra responsibility

68
00:02:45,667 --> 00:02:48,401
Around here, just getting stuff
done that needs doing.

69
00:02:50,371 --> 00:02:52,672
Graffiti's wrong, kids.
Don't do it.

70
00:02:52,674 --> 00:02:54,407
I love corn on the cob, too,

71
00:02:54,409 --> 00:02:56,309
But I'm not gonna paint it
all over the walls.

72
00:02:56,311 --> 00:02:58,811
I'm just hoping, you know,
in a few years

73
00:02:58,813 --> 00:03:00,413
I'll have enough
experience that dr. Foster

74
00:03:00,415 --> 00:03:03,416
Will consider me
for vice principal.

75
00:03:03,418 --> 00:03:05,051
Why don't you
just ask him for it?
You can't

76
00:03:05,053 --> 00:03:07,253
Just ask for a promotion.
You know.

77
00:03:07,255 --> 00:03:11,190
You have to earn the promotion
with years of good work.

78
00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:14,827
What's funny?

79
00:03:14,829 --> 00:03:17,897
Uh, how's that working out
for you, jess?

80
00:03:21,335 --> 00:03:23,403
Do you see this volleyball?

81
00:03:23,405 --> 00:03:25,905
It won't get over the net
just because you want it to

82
00:03:25,907 --> 00:03:28,074
And you hope someone will notice
that you want it to.

83
00:03:28,076 --> 00:03:30,376
Okay.
I'm gonna ask you one more time:

84
00:03:30,378 --> 00:03:35,248
What... Do you... Want?

85
00:03:35,250 --> 00:03:36,916
Um, I want to be vice principal.

86
00:03:36,918 --> 00:03:38,451
All right.
Then spike that ball, jess.

87
00:03:38,453 --> 00:03:41,354
Oh, that's not...
Okay, um...

88
00:03:41,356 --> 00:03:43,356
You got to spike!
You got to spike!
Is that really... Yeah. Okay.

89
00:03:43,358 --> 00:03:45,124
No, wait. I'm not very good...
I've just never
spike it!

90
00:03:45,126 --> 00:03:47,460
Really been good
with athlete balls.
Spike it! Spike it!

91
00:03:47,462 --> 00:03:49,729
What do you want?
Spike the ball
I want to be vice principal.

92
00:03:49,731 --> 00:03:53,466
And tell me what you want!
I want to be the vice principal!

93
00:03:53,468 --> 00:03:55,701
Yeah!
Yeah!

94
00:03:55,703 --> 00:03:57,470
Oh! Oh...
Oh!

95
00:03:57,472 --> 00:03:59,305
Oh...

96
00:03:59,307 --> 00:04:00,773
I will not laugh.

97
00:04:00,775 --> 00:04:02,775
An outrage! Been all over

98
00:04:02,777 --> 00:04:04,577
And I can't afford anybody.
Unbelievable.

99
00:04:04,579 --> 00:04:06,379
Access to premium
legal counsel should be

100
00:04:06,381 --> 00:04:09,148
Every jew's birthright.
And the jury will see

101
00:04:09,150 --> 00:04:11,217
That there is no justice
for the hebrew man.

102
00:04:11,219 --> 00:04:13,753
Not in these so-called
United States.

103
00:04:13,755 --> 00:04:16,789
What is that that you're doing?
I can't get enough
of this legal drama.

104
00:04:16,791 --> 00:04:19,058
Check this out.
Favorite author, grisham.

105
00:04:19,060 --> 00:04:20,593
Favorite tv show, judging amy.

106
00:04:20,595 --> 00:04:23,429
Favorite color, courtroom brown.

107
00:04:23,431 --> 00:04:26,265
Courtroom brown. Damn,
I wish that was my nickname.

108
00:04:26,267 --> 00:04:28,434
Did you just think of that?
'cause it was perfect, man.
Courtroom brown.

109
00:04:28,436 --> 00:04:30,403
Dude, you're a born
courtroom brown.

110
00:04:30,405 --> 00:04:32,572
That's me. When you say
"courtroom brown," I respond.

111
00:04:32,574 --> 00:04:34,140
Hey, winston.

112
00:04:34,142 --> 00:04:35,408
Hey, courtroom brown.
Yes?

113
00:04:36,811 --> 00:04:39,278
Kill 'em, courtroom!
That's awesome!

114
00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:40,580
What am I supposed to do
in this situation,

115
00:04:40,582 --> 00:04:42,615
Represent myself
like some nut job?

116
00:04:42,617 --> 00:04:43,950
Nick could be your lawyer.

117
00:04:43,952 --> 00:04:46,152
This nick? Vivica a. Dropout?

118
00:04:46,154 --> 00:04:47,420
First of all, I don't
want to be involved,

119
00:04:47,422 --> 00:04:49,622
But thank you,
courtroom brown.

120
00:04:49,624 --> 00:04:51,424
And second of all, I passed
the bar, which means

121
00:04:51,426 --> 00:04:53,793
I can practice in the
state of california.
Oh,

122
00:04:53,795 --> 00:04:56,162
Nick, you would be the worst
in the whole entire world.

123
00:04:56,164 --> 00:04:57,430
No offense. I love you, dawg.

124
00:04:57,432 --> 00:04:59,365
I could be your lawyer easy.

125
00:04:59,367 --> 00:05:02,168
You don't forget how to be a
lawyer. It's like riding a bike.

126
00:05:03,370 --> 00:05:06,606
They've changed these!

127
00:05:06,608 --> 00:05:07,974
Fine. I forgot
how to ride a bike.

128
00:05:07,976 --> 00:05:10,176
But I'm not gonna forget
how to be a lawyer.

129
00:05:10,178 --> 00:05:13,145
I guess I have no choice.
You can be my lawyer, nick.

130
00:05:13,147 --> 00:05:14,547
I won't do it. I value
what?

131
00:05:14,549 --> 00:05:16,115
Myself too great for that.

132
00:05:16,117 --> 00:05:17,483
If you want me
to be your lawyer,

133
00:05:17,485 --> 00:05:19,719
If you want to win this case,
you must start

134
00:05:19,721 --> 00:05:21,521
With the word "please."

135
00:05:21,523 --> 00:05:23,856
And I'll need a symbolic
five-dollar retainer.

136
00:05:23,858 --> 00:05:25,324
Four dollars.

137
00:05:25,326 --> 00:05:27,293
Skin it. Let's do it. Hooah.

138
00:05:27,295 --> 00:05:30,363
Dr. Foster, I am
young, I'm energetic

139
00:05:30,365 --> 00:05:33,666
And I think it's about time
you take advantage of me!

140
00:05:33,668 --> 00:05:36,969
Well, this is...
A little awkward.

141
00:05:36,971 --> 00:05:40,206
I'm, uh... I'm exclusively
into asian women.

142
00:05:40,208 --> 00:05:42,308
It's really
a kristi yamaguchi thing.

143
00:05:42,310 --> 00:05:44,744
After lillehammer...
I really meant
professionally—

144
00:05:44,746 --> 00:05:47,013
I want you to take
advantage of me like that.
Oh. I'm sorry.

145
00:05:47,015 --> 00:05:48,881
It's a professional thing.
Okay. Sorry.

146
00:05:48,883 --> 00:05:50,583
I want to be vice principal.

147
00:05:50,585 --> 00:05:53,419
Frank retired, you need
someone. I deserve it.

148
00:05:53,421 --> 00:05:55,588
I bust my ass for this school.

149
00:05:55,590 --> 00:05:57,723
You've got it. The job is yours.

150
00:05:57,725 --> 00:05:59,692
It is?
Oh, my god, are you kidding?

151
00:05:59,694 --> 00:06:02,194
I thought I was gonna have
to force somebody into it.

152
00:06:02,196 --> 00:06:03,829
This is so much easier.

153
00:06:03,831 --> 00:06:05,064
Really?
Go ahead.

154
00:06:05,066 --> 00:06:08,868
Be vice principal.

155
00:06:08,870 --> 00:06:10,703
I can't believe this.
In fact, I think

156
00:06:10,705 --> 00:06:12,271
You should start right now.

157
00:06:12,273 --> 00:06:14,607
You will not be sorry, sir.

158
00:06:15,876 --> 00:06:17,043
Did you?

159
00:06:17,045 --> 00:06:19,111
I got the job! Yeah!
Oh!

160
00:06:19,113 --> 00:06:20,680
I spiked the ball.
Time to celebrate.

161
00:06:20,682 --> 00:06:22,081
No! No! I'm not doing that!

162
00:06:22,083 --> 00:06:24,016
No!
We got to celebrate! Celebrate!

163
00:06:24,018 --> 00:06:26,152
No!
Let me pour it on your face
and your clothes and your hair!

164
00:06:29,790 --> 00:06:31,891
Yeah. Uh... Looks standard.

165
00:06:31,893 --> 00:06:33,693
Yeah.

166
00:06:33,695 --> 00:06:35,928
You're definitely
being sued.

167
00:06:35,930 --> 00:06:38,264
Uh, your deposition
is tomorrow.

168
00:06:38,266 --> 00:06:39,865
What-what do we do now?
Do we prep for the plaintiff?

169
00:06:39,867 --> 00:06:41,267
I don't like prepping.
It makes me feel nervous.

170
00:06:41,269 --> 00:06:43,035
I feel boxed in.
And I'm very quick

171
00:06:43,037 --> 00:06:46,105
On my, uh...
Sure.

172
00:06:46,107 --> 00:06:48,374
Did you just forget
the word "feet"?

173
00:06:48,376 --> 00:06:50,643
Feet. Yeah.
Nick, you should really prep.

174
00:06:50,645 --> 00:06:52,745
Fair enough.
Winston, you're my plaintiff.

175
00:06:52,747 --> 00:06:54,647
Done deal. Okay.

176
00:06:54,649 --> 00:06:57,650
hi, my name is tim baker.

177
00:06:57,652 --> 00:07:01,587
I live
at 522 dugan court terrace.

178
00:07:01,589 --> 00:07:04,390
Okay, mr. Baker,
how long have you been a chef?

179
00:07:04,392 --> 00:07:05,625
I don't have to answer that.

180
00:07:05,627 --> 00:07:07,026
You actually do though, winston.

181
00:07:07,728 --> 00:07:09,195
Doesn't he?

182
00:07:10,397 --> 00:07:12,598
You ask...
Why you asking me, man?

183
00:07:12,600 --> 00:07:14,467
No, I'm not. I'm...
Yeah. No, I know.
You're the lawyer.

184
00:07:14,469 --> 00:07:16,335
You have to answer.
how long you been a chef?

185
00:07:16,337 --> 00:07:18,004
I already answered that
during background.

186
00:07:18,006 --> 00:07:20,339
What in the hell?
You did background without me?

187
00:07:20,341 --> 00:07:22,408
Why wasn't I invited
for background?

188
00:07:22,410 --> 00:07:24,176
You have to answer it!
How long you been a chef?

189
00:07:24,178 --> 00:07:25,311
You're fired!

190
00:07:27,180 --> 00:07:30,850
Give me another chance.

191
00:07:30,852 --> 00:07:33,786
No!

192
00:07:33,788 --> 00:07:36,489
Okay, here's something.
Get on a plane with me.

193
00:07:36,491 --> 00:07:38,858
While you think about it,
put this on my card.

194
00:07:38,860 --> 00:07:41,494
It's the black one.

195
00:07:45,166 --> 00:07:46,766
Wow. That just happened.

196
00:07:46,768 --> 00:07:49,101
You think maybe we
should take his card

197
00:07:49,103 --> 00:07:50,703
And buy him a new shirt?

198
00:07:50,705 --> 00:07:52,271
I'm scared he'd want

199
00:07:52,273 --> 00:07:53,839
To change it
in front of us.

200
00:07:54,808 --> 00:07:55,675
I'm cece.

201
00:07:55,677 --> 00:07:57,376
Hi, cece. I'm buster.

202
00:07:57,378 --> 00:07:58,844
I really hope
that's a nickname.

203
00:07:58,846 --> 00:08:00,112
No, it's not a nickname.

204
00:08:00,114 --> 00:08:01,347
It's your real name?

205
00:08:01,349 --> 00:08:02,715
I was bullied pretty bad.

206
00:08:02,717 --> 00:08:03,683
Hi, buster.

207
00:08:03,685 --> 00:08:05,785
All right, hold on.
I've got

208
00:08:05,787 --> 00:08:07,520
Quite an eye for young boys.
Oh, god.

209
00:08:07,522 --> 00:08:09,522
That's right, I said it;
it's not a typo.

210
00:08:09,524 --> 00:08:10,756
Let's see some I.D.

211
00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:12,858
God, you're handsome.

212
00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:14,527
I'm sorry.

213
00:08:14,529 --> 00:08:15,695
Wyoming!

214
00:08:15,697 --> 00:08:16,829
Look at that.
Mm-hmm.

215
00:08:16,831 --> 00:08:18,130
Wyoming. So you're one

216
00:08:18,132 --> 00:08:20,700
Of the three people
from wyoming.
Yeah.

217
00:08:20,702 --> 00:08:24,704
Cowboy state, big sky country,
home of the liberty bell.

218
00:08:24,706 --> 00:08:26,906
Bull... Snatch.

219
00:08:26,908 --> 00:08:28,574
That's an awful accent.

220
00:08:28,576 --> 00:08:29,842
What is your real accent?

221
00:08:29,844 --> 00:08:31,310
Are you australian
or from heaven?

222
00:08:31,312 --> 00:08:32,745
How old are
you, for real?

223
00:08:32,747 --> 00:08:34,680
Leave him alone.
Don't bull-snatch
a bull-snatcher.

224
00:08:34,682 --> 00:08:37,049
Leave him alone.
You're over 21, right?

225
00:08:38,218 --> 00:08:39,318
I'm not.

226
00:08:39,320 --> 00:08:41,554
Um... I'm 20.

227
00:08:41,556 --> 00:08:43,923
Get out of here,
you delicious bastard.

228
00:08:43,925 --> 00:08:46,325
Can I get my I.D. Back?
No, of course not, you can't.

229
00:08:46,327 --> 00:08:48,661
It'd be against the law,
you... Wonderful creature.

230
00:08:48,663 --> 00:08:49,895
Nice to meet
you, cece.

231
00:08:49,897 --> 00:08:52,031
Good god, you look nice.

232
00:08:52,033 --> 00:08:54,333
Nothing irks me like
underage drinking.

233
00:08:54,335 --> 00:08:56,769
It's stupid, it's dangerous,
it's irresponsible.

234
00:08:56,771 --> 00:09:00,606
God, I want to have sex
with that kid so bad,
it's freaking me out!

235
00:09:00,608 --> 00:09:01,974
Oh...
I'm real tingly.

236
00:09:03,610 --> 00:09:05,911
We have talk about the budget.

237
00:09:05,913 --> 00:09:08,080
There's a problem
with the budget?
But it's due Monday.

238
00:09:08,082 --> 00:09:10,082
Yeah.
Do we have too much money?

239
00:09:10,084 --> 00:09:12,118
No.
We need to fire people.

240
00:09:12,120 --> 00:09:15,721
What?
And when I say "we,"
I mean you.

241
00:09:15,723 --> 00:09:17,456
Start with the most
recent hires.

242
00:09:17,458 --> 00:09:20,559
Well, we have, um... Janet
from the history department.

243
00:09:20,561 --> 00:09:22,361
human garbage.

244
00:09:22,363 --> 00:09:23,763
Okay.

245
00:09:23,765 --> 00:09:24,797
Ernie, uh...

246
00:09:24,799 --> 00:09:25,798
Ah, yeah.

247
00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:27,066
No. That's coach.

248
00:09:27,068 --> 00:09:28,734
No. No. No.

249
00:09:28,736 --> 00:09:30,770
No, he's very
good at his job.
Last one in,

250
00:09:30,772 --> 00:09:33,372
First one out—
you know how this works.

251
00:09:33,374 --> 00:09:35,641
That's just wrong.
This is the job, ms. Day.

252
00:09:35,643 --> 00:09:38,310
He's my friend. I can't.
No. I'm not doing it.
I'm not firing coach.

253
00:09:38,312 --> 00:09:40,045
This is the job, ms. Day.

254
00:09:40,047 --> 00:09:42,314
Do you want it or not?

255
00:09:46,253 --> 00:09:47,553
I'm what?

256
00:09:47,555 --> 00:09:48,888
We had to do budget cuts,

257
00:09:48,890 --> 00:09:50,456
And we have
to let two people go,

258
00:09:50,458 --> 00:09:52,825
And you're my friend,
and I couldn't stop it.

259
00:09:52,827 --> 00:09:53,993
I'm so sorry.

260
00:09:59,266 --> 00:10:00,733
We all pitched in.

261
00:10:00,735 --> 00:10:02,802
Thanks, guys,

262
00:10:02,804 --> 00:10:06,105
I'm not coach anymore.
I'm just coach.

263
00:10:06,107 --> 00:10:08,908
What?
What?

264
00:10:25,926 --> 00:10:27,092
Morning, winston.

265
00:10:30,931 --> 00:10:32,698
Are you not
talking to me?

266
00:10:32,700 --> 00:10:34,867
Look, I had

267
00:10:34,869 --> 00:10:36,869
To fire coach for my job.

268
00:10:36,871 --> 00:10:38,771
I didn't want to.

269
00:10:38,773 --> 00:10:41,140
Don't squint at me.

270
00:10:41,142 --> 00:10:43,008
Don't do that.

271
00:10:43,010 --> 00:10:45,811
I did it for my job.
It wasn't my choice.

272
00:10:45,813 --> 00:10:48,447
Hey, nick,
what's up, man?
What's up, winnie?

273
00:10:48,449 --> 00:10:50,816
Hey, nick.
Hey.

274
00:10:50,818 --> 00:10:52,852
Can we talk
for a second?
Can I talk to you?

275
00:10:52,854 --> 00:10:55,154
Schmidt fired me, and now
I'll never get to use

276
00:10:55,156 --> 00:10:57,623
This briefcase I just
bought, and it was $19!

277
00:10:57,625 --> 00:10:59,325
I think my thing is
a little bit more...
Do you think

278
00:10:59,327 --> 00:11:01,393
I'm sexier when I hold it
or when it's down?

279
00:11:01,395 --> 00:11:03,729
'cause I think it's
kind of sexier when
I hold it, like this.

280
00:11:03,731 --> 00:11:06,832
Not really.
Do I look like
a man of power?

281
00:11:06,834 --> 00:11:08,300
Imagine this—
it's, like, a rainy day,

282
00:11:08,302 --> 00:11:10,002
I'm on the streets
of new york,

283
00:11:10,004 --> 00:11:13,639
hey!
Stop that cab!

284
00:11:13,641 --> 00:11:16,508
I'm a businessman.
I'm late to an
important meeting.

285
00:11:19,347 --> 00:11:21,247
Want to be a lawyer—
why do you care whether

286
00:11:21,249 --> 00:11:22,681
Schmidt fired you or not?
I spent

287
00:11:22,683 --> 00:11:24,250
All those years at law school

288
00:11:24,252 --> 00:11:25,918
With those preppy dicks...

289
00:11:25,920 --> 00:11:28,754
And I never got
to prove them wrong, jess.
Okay,

290
00:11:28,756 --> 00:11:29,889
Go after what you want.

291
00:11:29,891 --> 00:11:31,724
Just make sure that

292
00:11:31,726 --> 00:11:33,259
What you want...

293
00:11:33,261 --> 00:11:36,562
Doesn't make you a
cog on the wheel

294
00:11:36,564 --> 00:11:39,431
Of a larger, flawed system.
Stop it.

295
00:11:39,433 --> 00:11:40,866
Shut your mouth.

296
00:11:40,868 --> 00:11:42,668
'cause what you're
saying is beautiful.

297
00:11:42,670 --> 00:11:45,170
I'm gonna go put on
my power suit.

298
00:11:45,172 --> 00:11:47,006
High and loud, girl. Whoo!

299
00:11:47,008 --> 00:11:47,907
Um...

300
00:11:47,909 --> 00:11:48,908
Good talk, nick.

301
00:11:48,910 --> 00:11:50,676
With this thing, I feel so sexy,

302
00:11:50,678 --> 00:11:52,177
It's disgusting.

303
00:11:52,179 --> 00:11:53,812
I think you misunderstood...
Whoo!

304
00:11:56,950 --> 00:11:59,184
Your representation
running late?
Uh, no.

305
00:11:59,186 --> 00:12:02,054
Actually, I'll be
representing myself today.
Sorry we're late.

306
00:12:02,056 --> 00:12:04,256
What?
This building is a total mess.

307
00:12:04,258 --> 00:12:06,558
Nick miller of, uh, cooper,
bishop and furguson.

308
00:12:06,560 --> 00:12:09,862
As you know, my boss and senior
partner, mr. Winston furguson.

309
00:12:09,864 --> 00:12:11,063
Gentlemen, pleased
to be with you. Please, please

310
00:12:11,065 --> 00:12:13,032
Don't get up, don't get up.

311
00:12:13,034 --> 00:12:14,199
I-I insist.

312
00:12:14,201 --> 00:12:17,069
Madam secretary.

313
00:12:17,071 --> 00:12:18,971
What are you
doing here?
I'm representing you.

314
00:12:18,973 --> 00:12:20,873
Everything all right?
I'm a bit caught off guard.

315
00:12:20,875 --> 00:12:22,041
I wasn't expecting
these two

316
00:12:22,043 --> 00:12:23,776
Very real lawyers
to show up today.

317
00:12:23,778 --> 00:12:25,444
Well, we wanted to
let you know that

318
00:12:25,446 --> 00:12:27,980
The entire firm is standing
behind you. Besides,

319
00:12:27,982 --> 00:12:30,049
Whether I sit in my office
or in here...

320
00:12:30,051 --> 00:12:32,618
It's all billable—
am I right, gentlemen?

321
00:12:33,988 --> 00:12:37,089
Shall we get into this,
or just take our pants off?

322
00:12:39,793 --> 00:12:41,660
Ask him a question.

323
00:12:41,662 --> 00:12:43,796
Let me... Let me do my thing.
Do your thing.

324
00:12:43,798 --> 00:12:44,897
mr. Baker.

325
00:12:44,899 --> 00:12:45,731
Yes?

326
00:12:49,235 --> 00:12:51,503
What's your home address?

327
00:12:51,505 --> 00:12:53,439
522 dugan court terrace.

328
00:12:53,441 --> 00:12:54,740
Okay.

329
00:12:56,744 --> 00:12:58,978
Uh, no... No
further questions.

330
00:12:58,980 --> 00:13:00,913
What?

331
00:13:02,682 --> 00:13:03,949
Keep going.
Ow!

332
00:13:03,951 --> 00:13:05,918
Just keep going. What are you...

333
00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:07,619
Don't hit me. What are
you hitting me for?

334
00:13:07,621 --> 00:13:10,022
Is everything all right?
Sure it is. The meter's running.

335
00:13:13,526 --> 00:13:15,928
Even though you don't work
at coolidge anymore,

336
00:13:15,930 --> 00:13:18,430
You'll still be coach
coach to those kids.

337
00:13:18,432 --> 00:13:19,965
It's coach coach.

338
00:13:19,967 --> 00:13:21,333
Yeah, coach coach.

339
00:13:21,335 --> 00:13:23,102
Coach coach.
Coach coa...

340
00:13:23,104 --> 00:13:24,636
Coach coach.
I'm sorry.

341
00:13:24,638 --> 00:13:26,105
it's all good, jess.

342
00:13:26,107 --> 00:13:28,507
You did what
you had to do.

343
00:13:28,509 --> 00:13:30,642
I'm proud of you
for that, okay?

344
00:13:30,644 --> 00:13:33,645
Yeah.
I hope I'm the first
of many you fire.

345
00:13:33,647 --> 00:13:35,147
That really means
a lot to me.

346
00:13:35,149 --> 00:13:37,316
I am gonna miss
those kids, though.

347
00:13:37,318 --> 00:13:39,118
Yeah.
That's what I'm gonna miss.

348
00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:40,953
Those little...
Those little bastards.

349
00:13:40,955 --> 00:13:42,354
Little ronnie.

350
00:13:42,356 --> 00:13:44,723
Ronnie's so clumsy and slow.

351
00:13:44,725 --> 00:13:46,825
Yeah.
Thomas.

352
00:13:46,827 --> 00:13:49,962
I mean, he's strong, but that
boy is a classic middle child.

353
00:13:49,964 --> 00:13:53,198
He's just looking for love,
up, back and sideways.

354
00:13:54,568 --> 00:13:57,369
And maurice.

355
00:13:57,371 --> 00:13:59,204
he always

356
00:13:59,206 --> 00:14:01,240
Makes a mess whenever
he eats a Popsicle.

357
00:14:01,242 --> 00:14:02,708
It's, like, dude,

358
00:14:02,710 --> 00:14:04,343
Stop sucking
your Popsicle like that, man.

359
00:14:04,345 --> 00:14:06,345
You're never gonna get
a girlfriend like that.

360
00:14:08,049 --> 00:14:09,014
And then there's hunter.

361
00:14:09,016 --> 00:14:10,349
God...

362
00:14:10,351 --> 00:14:13,485
Fat... Cross-eyed...

363
00:14:13,487 --> 00:14:15,087
Clod-hopping hunter.

364
00:14:15,089 --> 00:14:17,523
Hunter is
the sweetest little idiot

365
00:14:17,525 --> 00:14:19,024
There ever was.

366
00:14:19,026 --> 00:14:21,360
He's so sweet!

367
00:14:21,362 --> 00:14:23,095
He's so sweet!

368
00:14:23,097 --> 00:14:25,531
Ahh...

369
00:14:26,700 --> 00:14:28,100
Screw this!

370
00:14:28,102 --> 00:14:31,236
Because... You told me...

371
00:14:31,238 --> 00:14:34,740
To go after what I wanted,
and this is not what I wanted.

372
00:14:34,742 --> 00:14:37,209
Let's go! We're gonna
get you to that game!

373
00:14:37,211 --> 00:14:38,277
It's okay.
They're playing pasadena.

374
00:14:38,279 --> 00:14:40,779
They don't stand a chance.

375
00:14:40,781 --> 00:14:42,081
Pasadena has a bunch
of bitch-ass tricks.

376
00:14:42,083 --> 00:14:43,582
Weren't raised right.

377
00:14:43,584 --> 00:14:46,752
Hey, what do you want?

378
00:14:46,754 --> 00:14:49,121
I don't know.
I want to be there.

379
00:14:49,123 --> 00:14:52,558
So, spike that ball!

380
00:14:52,560 --> 00:14:56,061
That was not a ball.
That was beer.

381
00:14:56,063 --> 00:14:58,063
I know. I feel
really bad about it.

382
00:14:58,065 --> 00:14:59,965
You know what?
Don't feel bad!
Let's go!

383
00:14:59,967 --> 00:15:02,067
Let's go!
You got me all fired up!

384
00:15:02,069 --> 00:15:03,535
I think
you're gonna have to drive.

385
00:15:06,973 --> 00:15:08,440
Mr. "were
you or were you not

386
00:15:08,442 --> 00:15:10,109
Wearing oversized
shoes in the store?"

387
00:15:10,111 --> 00:15:12,811
Mr. "I was not.
I told you that."

388
00:15:12,813 --> 00:15:15,380
Mr. "but are you sure?"
mr. "shut up, nick."

389
00:15:15,382 --> 00:15:17,382
Mr.
"let me do this. Ow. Stop it."

390
00:15:17,384 --> 00:15:19,985
Mr. "stop what?
You're hitting yourself."

391
00:15:19,987 --> 00:15:22,054
Mr.
"you're a child."

392
00:15:22,056 --> 00:15:24,423
Mr. "a child
would be a better lawyer."

393
00:15:24,425 --> 00:15:26,992
Mr. "children
are our future."

394
00:15:26,994 --> 00:15:28,827
Mr. "so true."

395
00:15:28,829 --> 00:15:30,295
Mr.
"I need to regroup.

396
00:15:30,297 --> 00:15:31,930
"I'm gonna stall a
little bit. Watch this.

397
00:15:31,932 --> 00:15:34,166
Could the lady typer read
that back?"

398
00:15:34,168 --> 00:15:35,667
All right, all right,
we've had enough.

399
00:15:35,669 --> 00:15:37,503
My client is graciously willing

400
00:15:37,505 --> 00:15:39,671
To settle for $20,000.

401
00:15:39,673 --> 00:15:42,141
As an actual real attorney,

402
00:15:42,143 --> 00:15:43,442
I highly suggest
you take the deal.

403
00:15:43,444 --> 00:15:46,111
Great. We'll do...
Not a chance.

404
00:15:46,113 --> 00:15:47,112
There's not a chance.

405
00:15:47,114 --> 00:15:48,247
Sidebar. Come on, schmidt.

406
00:15:48,249 --> 00:15:49,548
Hurry up.
Just...

407
00:15:50,750 --> 00:15:53,018
You are not taking
that settlement.

408
00:15:53,020 --> 00:15:54,419
Well, nick, at least
if it's $20,000,

409
00:15:54,421 --> 00:15:56,288
I can get out
of that hole some day.

410
00:15:56,290 --> 00:15:58,891
I've got a plan. You just have
to give me a chance.

411
00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:01,960
Can you believe in me?

412
00:16:01,962 --> 00:16:04,263
all right,
I believe in you. Deal.

413
00:16:04,265 --> 00:16:06,098
Deal.
What's the plan?

414
00:16:06,100 --> 00:16:08,267
Oh, I'm not telling you. You're
gonna get too mad. Let's go.

415
00:16:08,269 --> 00:16:10,402
Nick, I take it back! I don't...
I don't believe in you!

416
00:16:12,172 --> 00:16:13,872
Here.

417
00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:18,177
How long is this game?

418
00:16:18,179 --> 00:16:20,279
Go get 'em, coach.

419
00:16:20,281 --> 00:16:23,615
All right, listen up,
you no-talent,

420
00:16:23,617 --> 00:16:25,317
Idiot babies!

421
00:16:25,319 --> 00:16:27,953
Give me that. Give me that.
Give me that. Give me that.

422
00:16:27,955 --> 00:16:29,121
Oh, thank god.

423
00:16:29,123 --> 00:16:30,822
Bring it in.

424
00:16:30,824 --> 00:16:32,224
Come on.

425
00:16:32,226 --> 00:16:34,326
All right, now,

426
00:16:34,328 --> 00:16:36,461
Who is gonna win this match?

427
00:16:36,463 --> 00:16:37,863
Coolidge!

428
00:16:37,865 --> 00:16:38,964
Who's number one?

429
00:16:38,966 --> 00:16:40,465
Coolidge!

430
00:16:40,467 --> 00:16:41,633
Let me hear it! Who are we?

431
00:16:41,635 --> 00:16:43,135
Coolidge!
Rakim!

432
00:16:43,137 --> 00:16:45,204
Really, rakim?
Like I just walked you

433
00:16:45,206 --> 00:16:47,406
Right up to it, and you're
gonna... We're gonna talk.

434
00:16:47,408 --> 00:16:49,741
Coolidge!
Too late,
man. It's too late.

435
00:16:49,743 --> 00:16:51,977
All right, guys,
get out there and make me proud!

436
00:16:54,014 --> 00:16:55,581
Ms. Day?
What?

437
00:16:55,583 --> 00:16:58,350
What is going on?
I thought you fired coach.

438
00:16:58,352 --> 00:17:01,053
Look, coach loves the kids,
and the kids love him.

439
00:17:01,055 --> 00:17:03,322
I want this job, but I'm
not going to do it your way.

440
00:17:03,324 --> 00:17:05,757
I'm not going to let
our best people go.

441
00:17:05,759 --> 00:17:09,361
You were the one who told me,
we have no money.

442
00:17:09,363 --> 00:17:11,730
Yeah, but we can make it up in
other ways, we can be creative.

443
00:17:11,732 --> 00:17:13,665
We can rent out
the multipurpose room

444
00:17:13,667 --> 00:17:15,567
After school to local clubs.

445
00:17:15,569 --> 00:17:17,336
And where will
the orchestra practice?

446
00:17:17,338 --> 00:17:19,571
Did you ever consider that,
ms. Day?

447
00:17:19,573 --> 00:17:23,575
Or were you too busy
buying a ladies bike?
What?

448
00:17:23,577 --> 00:17:24,509
They can use the library.

449
00:17:24,511 --> 00:17:26,178
No one goes in there anyway.

450
00:17:26,180 --> 00:17:27,713
Yeah, let's burn the books!

451
00:17:27,715 --> 00:17:30,515
Except for the da vinci code.

452
00:17:30,517 --> 00:17:33,385
Well, that took a
weird turn, but...

453
00:17:33,387 --> 00:17:35,721
Thank you, susan.
That-that's so nice.

454
00:17:35,723 --> 00:17:37,723
What a great solution.

455
00:17:37,725 --> 00:17:39,791
Come on!
Let's do it!

456
00:17:39,793 --> 00:17:42,728
Oh! Hunter, you animal!

457
00:17:45,199 --> 00:17:47,566
yeah! Hit the robot.

458
00:17:47,568 --> 00:17:49,201
Uh, uh, yeah, hit it.

459
00:17:49,203 --> 00:17:53,772
I guess we can figure out
some way to keep him here.

460
00:17:53,774 --> 00:17:56,141
God, you frost my cookies.

461
00:17:56,143 --> 00:17:57,743
Thank you.

462
00:17:57,745 --> 00:17:59,311
Way! Uh!

463
00:17:59,313 --> 00:18:00,579
Wait, what am I...
Get... Get back out there.

464
00:18:00,581 --> 00:18:02,614
We got...
We still have a game to play.

465
00:18:02,616 --> 00:18:03,415
Hey, coach, guess what?

466
00:18:03,417 --> 00:18:05,117
Ball! Oh.
Oh.

467
00:18:05,119 --> 00:18:06,385
It's okay.

468
00:18:06,387 --> 00:18:08,620
Don't laugh, guys.

469
00:18:08,622 --> 00:18:11,990
Did you see that hit her face?
I'm okay. I'm gonna sit down.

470
00:18:13,894 --> 00:18:15,794
so, are you gonna sit, or...?

471
00:18:15,796 --> 00:18:17,429
No, I'm gonna stand.

472
00:18:17,431 --> 00:18:18,730
'cause isn't that
what we are doing?

473
00:18:18,732 --> 00:18:20,265
Standing... For the little guy?

474
00:18:20,267 --> 00:18:21,266
What is the plan?

475
00:18:21,268 --> 00:18:23,268
Injustice!

476
00:18:23,270 --> 00:18:24,736
I will not stand for it.

477
00:18:24,738 --> 00:18:26,305
That is why
I will sit right now.

478
00:18:26,307 --> 00:18:28,307
I will sit down

479
00:18:28,309 --> 00:18:30,509
In this chair...

480
00:18:32,079 --> 00:18:35,280
You're negligent! Aah!

481
00:18:35,282 --> 00:18:39,951
Get off me! My neck! My neck!

482
00:18:39,953 --> 00:18:42,421
Seriously? The fall-down
on the chair bit?

483
00:18:42,423 --> 00:18:44,256
Is this your
first case?
Yes, it is.

484
00:18:44,258 --> 00:18:47,359
And that is why I'll file
petition on petition.

485
00:18:47,361 --> 00:18:48,927
You're gonna wake up in
the morning to paperwork.

486
00:18:48,929 --> 00:18:52,164
You're gonna go to bed at night
to paperwork.

487
00:18:53,099 --> 00:18:54,499
So how about
this, gentlemen?

488
00:18:54,501 --> 00:18:58,503
You pay the $20,000 settlement
to your client yourself,

489
00:18:58,505 --> 00:19:01,373
And you'll never
see our faces again.

490
00:19:01,375 --> 00:19:02,808
What do you call a lunatic

491
00:19:02,810 --> 00:19:06,445
Who's only got one case
and no hobbies?

492
00:19:06,447 --> 00:19:08,480
Your worst nightmare.

493
00:19:08,482 --> 00:19:11,083
Let's go, guys.

494
00:19:12,352 --> 00:19:14,953
Listen, bill,

495
00:19:14,955 --> 00:19:16,655
If you ever want
to play with the big boys,

496
00:19:16,657 --> 00:19:20,025
You'll give me a ring,
won't you?

497
00:19:22,329 --> 00:19:24,796
This is a baseball card.

498
00:19:24,798 --> 00:19:27,399
Yeah.

499
00:19:27,401 --> 00:19:28,467
All right!

500
00:19:28,469 --> 00:19:30,302
All right. You did it.
I did it.

501
00:19:30,304 --> 00:19:31,403
Salud.
Cheers!

502
00:19:35,209 --> 00:19:37,042
On the house!
You don't get
to say that, winnie.

503
00:19:37,044 --> 00:19:38,310
You know that, right? Okay.

504
00:19:38,312 --> 00:19:40,178
Oh, I knew you'd
come back for me.

505
00:19:40,180 --> 00:19:43,248
So what do you want to do
now? You want to just drive?

506
00:19:43,250 --> 00:19:44,883
Oh, no. Mike!

507
00:19:44,885 --> 00:19:46,518
What?
Ple... I got it.

508
00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:47,686
Thank you.

509
00:19:47,688 --> 00:19:49,654
Hey, what you doing here?

510
00:19:49,656 --> 00:19:51,323
I just wanted
to come and say...
Mm-hmm.

511
00:19:51,325 --> 00:19:52,491
First things first.

512
00:19:52,493 --> 00:19:54,526
The legal drinking age
in australia is 18.

513
00:19:54,528 --> 00:19:56,428
Second, you're really beautiful.

514
00:19:56,430 --> 00:19:58,063
Like, you're really beautiful.

515
00:19:58,065 --> 00:20:00,198
Like, I want
to take you out some time.

516
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,868
But because I'm 20 and already
at a bit of a disadvantage,

517
00:20:02,870 --> 00:20:04,903
I thought I'd come
and do some uncharacteristic

518
00:20:04,905 --> 00:20:06,671
Self-promotion
to help the cause?

519
00:20:06,673 --> 00:20:08,240
Okay.
And let you know that

520
00:20:08,242 --> 00:20:09,908
Well, I just opened
my own business.

521
00:20:09,910 --> 00:20:12,077
I build boats.

522
00:20:12,079 --> 00:20:14,212
Uh, wooden boats
with my hands.

523
00:20:14,214 --> 00:20:17,015
Mm-hmm.
Um, old ladies love me.

524
00:20:17,017 --> 00:20:18,450
They call me sensitive.

525
00:20:18,452 --> 00:20:19,618
And I'm a really
good cook.

526
00:20:19,620 --> 00:20:21,720
But I know three dishes,

527
00:20:21,722 --> 00:20:25,290
And two of those dishes
are the same thing.

528
00:20:25,292 --> 00:20:27,459
Yeah, that's about it,
so, what do you think?

529
00:20:27,461 --> 00:20:28,794
Do you want to get a drink?

530
00:20:28,796 --> 00:20:30,462
Like a soft drink with you?

531
00:20:30,464 --> 00:20:32,531
Soft drink, a walk.
Can you have a coffee?

532
00:20:32,533 --> 00:20:34,065
Yeah, I love coffee.
Mm-hmm.

533
00:20:34,067 --> 00:20:36,368
It's one of the three meals
that I know how I make.

534
00:20:37,870 --> 00:20:40,372
All right.

535
00:20:40,374 --> 00:20:42,073
Oh, do it!
Well, done, sir!

536
00:20:42,075 --> 00:20:43,475
Oh!
Oh, yeah.

537
00:20:43,477 --> 00:20:44,743
Or you know
what? We could

538
00:20:44,745 --> 00:20:46,711
Actually... We could
probably just go now.

539
00:20:46,713 --> 00:20:48,880
I'd like to comb your hair,
you hunk.

540
00:20:48,882 --> 00:20:50,382
I don't know who they are.
They just come in here,

541
00:20:50,384 --> 00:20:51,917
And they drink,
and make a lot of noise

542
00:20:51,919 --> 00:20:53,285
And talk about things
they don't know about!

543
00:20:53,287 --> 00:20:56,555
I don't know when I'll be back.
I'll just meet you out front.

544
00:20:53,287 --> 00:21:03,287
Hey, mike,
I'm gonna take a break. Um...

545
00:20:57,723 --> 00:20:58,924
Stop what you're doing.

546
00:20:58,926 --> 00:21:01,593
There's a lawyer here to make...

547
00:21:01,595 --> 00:21:02,961
Jessica?

548
00:21:02,963 --> 00:21:04,996
Jessica, I won the case.

549
00:21:06,599 --> 00:21:10,836
If you woke up right now,
we could be making love.

550
00:21:10,838 --> 00:21:12,604
Jessica?

551
00:21:12,606 --> 00:21:15,574
Power couple.

552
00:21:36,430 --> 00:21:39,698
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