1
00:00:02,270 --> 00:00:03,634
Go. Get the door.
Here we are.

2
00:00:03,703 --> 00:00:04,929
Go. Push.

3
00:00:05,003 --> 00:00:06,492
Oh, God.
Push.

4
00:00:06,570 --> 00:00:08,160
No, no, no. Turn it
around. Really shove it.

5
00:00:08,236 --> 00:00:09,895
You'll break it. Shove
it through. Break it!

6
00:00:09,969 --> 00:00:12,094
You shove it.
Shove it back.

7
00:00:14,703 --> 00:00:16,168
Here we go.

8
00:00:16,637 --> 00:00:19,102
Don't break the
branches, Dwight.

9
00:00:19,770 --> 00:00:21,099
All right.

10
00:00:21,670 --> 00:00:24,727
I got a splinter. Well, suck
it up. We all have problems.

11
00:00:24,803 --> 00:00:27,394
Hey, everybody.
Look what we have.

12
00:00:30,170 --> 00:00:31,500
Nice, huh?

13
00:00:31,570 --> 00:00:32,797
I've got it leveraged.

14
00:00:32,869 --> 00:00:34,233
Push. Straight up.
On three. Ready?

15
00:00:34,303 --> 00:00:36,701
Big. One, two, three.
One, two, three.

16
00:00:40,069 --> 00:00:41,660
Merry Christmas.

17
00:00:42,827 --> 00:00:48,894
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.

18
00:01:18,903 --> 00:01:20,460
Did it work?

19
00:01:20,537 --> 00:01:22,503
Well, sort of.

20
00:01:23,737 --> 00:01:25,895
Why did you
get it so big?

21
00:01:25,969 --> 00:01:30,334
A, that's what she said, and,
B, I wanted it to be impressive.

22
00:01:30,403 --> 00:01:33,369
The biggest day of the year deserves
the biggest tree of the year.

23
00:01:33,436 --> 00:01:35,698
But what are we gonna do
with this hacked-off part?

24
00:01:35,770 --> 00:01:38,792
Well, that is a perfectly
good mini-tree, Kevin,

25
00:01:38,869 --> 00:01:41,597
and we are going to
sell that to charity.

26
00:01:41,670 --> 00:01:44,158
That's what Christmas
is all about.

27
00:01:52,270 --> 00:01:56,032
So this year, for the first time
ever, I got Pam in Secret Santa,

28
00:01:56,103 --> 00:01:57,966
and I got her this teapot,

29
00:01:58,036 --> 00:02:00,968
which I know she really wants,
so she can make tea at her desk.

30
00:02:01,036 --> 00:02:04,298
But I'm also gonna stuff it
with some inside jokes.

31
00:02:04,370 --> 00:02:07,632
Like, this is my
high school yearbook photo.

32
00:02:07,703 --> 00:02:11,157
She saw it at the party,
and it really makes her laugh.

33
00:02:11,470 --> 00:02:12,958
Not sure why.

34
00:02:13,736 --> 00:02:15,066
What else?

35
00:02:15,537 --> 00:02:17,526
This is a hot sauce packet.

36
00:02:17,603 --> 00:02:20,330
She put this on a hot dog
a couple years ago

37
00:02:20,403 --> 00:02:22,925
because she thought
it was ketchup.

38
00:02:23,436 --> 00:02:26,596
And it was really funny,
so I kept the other two.

39
00:02:27,436 --> 00:02:31,027
This would take a little too
long to explain, so I won't.

40
00:02:31,103 --> 00:02:32,898
And this is the card.

41
00:02:34,103 --> 00:02:37,728
Because Christmas is the time
to tell people how you feel.

42
00:02:40,503 --> 00:02:42,298
Is there anything
we're missing?

43
00:02:42,370 --> 00:02:43,631
Phyllis, you got the lights?

44
00:02:43,703 --> 00:02:45,635
Yes, I got
those cute little ones.

45
00:02:47,236 --> 00:02:49,134
Do you think I should
have gotten the big ones?

46
00:02:49,203 --> 00:02:50,533
We'll see.

47
00:02:50,869 --> 00:02:53,892
Angela drafted me into the
party planning committee.

48
00:02:53,969 --> 00:02:58,231
Her memo said that we need to
prepare for every possible disaster,

49
00:02:59,603 --> 00:03:02,467
which to me seems excessive.

50
00:03:03,503 --> 00:03:07,935
Merry Christmas!
Ho, ho, ho, pimp.

51
00:03:08,769 --> 00:03:11,099
I'm kidding. What do we got?
What do we got?

52
00:03:11,170 --> 00:03:12,931
How many plates are we getting? Fifty.

53
00:03:13,003 --> 00:03:15,696
Double it. Double everything.
Double ice cream. Double napkins.

54
00:03:15,769 --> 00:03:17,531
Double it. On me.

55
00:03:18,103 --> 00:03:21,331
It was a tough year. I had
to fire somebody this year.

56
00:03:21,403 --> 00:03:23,528
This party has to really rock.

57
00:03:23,603 --> 00:03:27,330
Check it out.
Christmas bonus, 3,000 Gs.

58
00:03:27,403 --> 00:03:30,392
I got this for helping
save the company money.

59
00:03:30,903 --> 00:03:34,427
So I guess some good came
out of firing Devon after all.

60
00:03:34,669 --> 00:03:36,726
Maybe I should call him
and tell him that.

61
00:03:36,802 --> 00:03:41,428
I want people to cut loose. I
want people making out in closets.

62
00:03:42,436 --> 00:03:46,765
I want people hanging from the
ceilings, lamp shades on the heads.

63
00:03:46,836 --> 00:03:49,734
I want it to be
a Playboy Mansion party.

64
00:03:49,802 --> 00:03:54,030
And also, I want you to know and spread
the word that I will have my digital camera.

65
00:03:54,103 --> 00:03:56,694
And I'll be taking pictures
all along the way.

66
00:03:56,769 --> 00:03:59,099
And the best and
craziest thing that happens

67
00:03:59,170 --> 00:04:01,897
will be on the cover
of the newsletter. Incentive.

68
00:04:01,969 --> 00:04:04,231
You do realize that we can't
serve liquor at the party.

69
00:04:04,303 --> 00:04:06,166
Yeah. I know. Damn it.

70
00:04:06,370 --> 00:04:10,200
Stupid corporate wet blankets.
Like booze ever killed anybody.

71
00:04:11,336 --> 00:04:12,961
One. Two. Three.

72
00:04:14,836 --> 00:04:17,268
You guys should
use a hand truck.

73
00:04:17,336 --> 00:04:19,995
Do we have one?
No.

74
00:04:23,669 --> 00:04:25,431
Will you help me?

75
00:04:26,203 --> 00:04:29,169
No! No way. It... No.
Come on, Mike.

76
00:04:29,236 --> 00:04:31,065
Let me borrow the hat
for just a couple of hours.

77
00:04:31,136 --> 00:04:32,466
You wanna be Santa?
Yeah.

78
00:04:32,537 --> 00:04:33,900
Have you ever seen Santa?

79
00:04:33,969 --> 00:04:35,435
Yeah, I've seen Santa.
Okay.

80
00:04:35,503 --> 00:04:38,435
Who cares? Well, I'm
sorry. It just doesn't work.

81
00:04:38,503 --> 00:04:41,094
Michael, I would like
to be the elf.

82
00:04:42,069 --> 00:04:44,899
That makes sense because
he has elfish features.

83
00:04:46,736 --> 00:04:48,032
Okay, everyone.
Listen up.

84
00:04:48,836 --> 00:04:52,200
It is time to get your
presents, wrap them

85
00:04:52,270 --> 00:04:56,225
and place them
under the tree, like so.

86
00:04:57,470 --> 00:05:00,561
If you do not get your present
wrapped and under the tree

87
00:05:00,636 --> 00:05:02,898
within the next five minutes,

88
00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:06,094
you will be disqualified
from Secret Santa. All right?

89
00:05:06,170 --> 00:05:08,363
No exceptions except Michael.

90
00:05:08,936 --> 00:05:10,402
I got Angela.

91
00:05:10,869 --> 00:05:15,359
She is into these posters
of babies dressed as adults.

92
00:05:15,470 --> 00:05:17,459
I got her one of those.

93
00:05:18,103 --> 00:05:20,501
I felt kind of weird
buying that.

94
00:05:20,969 --> 00:05:24,402
I got Creed. And to tell you the truth,
I don't know anything about Creed.

95
00:05:24,470 --> 00:05:27,436
I know his name's Creed. I
know he works right over there.

96
00:05:27,503 --> 00:05:29,627
I think he's Irish and I...

97
00:05:30,069 --> 00:05:33,092
I got him this
shamrock keychain.

98
00:05:34,702 --> 00:05:36,930
I got myself for Secret Santa.

99
00:05:37,602 --> 00:05:40,591
I was supposed to tell
somebody, but I didn't.

100
00:05:42,403 --> 00:05:44,494
You get something
good this year?

101
00:05:45,003 --> 00:05:48,367
I think I did a pretty good
job. Yeah? Who did you have?

102
00:05:48,436 --> 00:05:50,493
Well, I can't tell you,
'cause it's a secret.

103
00:05:50,569 --> 00:05:52,433
I think I got something
pretty nice for my guy.

104
00:05:52,503 --> 00:05:55,525
Yeah? I spent a lot of
dough. Lot of dough. Wow.

105
00:05:55,602 --> 00:05:57,898
Well, there's a $20
limit, right? So... Yeah.

106
00:05:57,969 --> 00:06:01,060
I wanted this party to be really special
so I sort of went above and beyond.

107
00:06:01,136 --> 00:06:03,193
That's great. Well, don't tell
me who it is, 'cause I can...

108
00:06:03,270 --> 00:06:07,225
It was Ryan. Yeah.
I have Ryan.

109
00:06:07,303 --> 00:06:11,564
Gather round. Secret Santa,
let's go. Let's go. Come on.

110
00:06:11,802 --> 00:06:14,927
Stanley, no. I'm gonna handle
the cord. Okay, safety reasons.

111
00:06:15,003 --> 00:06:16,469
I know how
to plug something in.

112
00:06:16,536 --> 00:06:17,900
I want to do it.

113
00:06:18,003 --> 00:06:22,628
All right, let's count it
down, like Rockefeller Center.

114
00:06:22,702 --> 00:06:23,895
Ready?

115
00:06:24,436 --> 00:06:27,595
Three, two, one.
Three, two, one.

116
00:06:30,736 --> 00:06:32,225
Not great.

117
00:06:32,303 --> 00:06:33,962
I'm sorry, everybody.

118
00:06:34,903 --> 00:06:36,630
I think the tree looks nice.

119
00:06:36,702 --> 00:06:38,668
Hey, I could get
some flares from my car.

120
00:06:38,736 --> 00:06:42,328
No. No. Shake it off, everybody.
Just, let's do Secret Santa.

121
00:06:42,536 --> 00:06:46,264
Presents are the best way to
show someone how much you care.

122
00:06:47,003 --> 00:06:50,026
It is like this tangible thing
that you can point to and say,

123
00:06:50,103 --> 00:06:53,399
"Hey, man, I love you
this many dollars' worth. "

124
00:06:53,903 --> 00:06:55,698
First present, Oscar.

125
00:06:59,869 --> 00:07:01,028
Shower radio. Neat.

126
00:07:01,103 --> 00:07:02,330
Oh, good, that was from me.

127
00:07:02,403 --> 00:07:04,232
Thanks, Kelly. You know
I was gonna get one of...

128
00:07:04,303 --> 00:07:07,133
Okay. Okay. That's enough.
Let's keep it moving on.

129
00:07:07,203 --> 00:07:09,362
Jim.
Oh, cool.

130
00:07:13,702 --> 00:07:14,690
That's from me.

131
00:07:14,769 --> 00:07:15,792
Great.

132
00:07:16,903 --> 00:07:18,369
Where did you get it?

133
00:07:18,435 --> 00:07:20,425
I don't know.
It was so long ago.

134
00:07:20,536 --> 00:07:22,866
He obviously forgot
to get me something,

135
00:07:22,936 --> 00:07:26,130
and then he went into his closet
and dug out this little number

136
00:07:26,203 --> 00:07:27,691
and then threw it in a bag.

137
00:07:27,802 --> 00:07:29,700
Yep. That's exactly
what happened.

138
00:07:29,769 --> 00:07:30,962
Pam.

139
00:07:38,802 --> 00:07:40,325
Oh, my God!

140
00:07:41,836 --> 00:07:44,893
Thank you very much, Santa,
whoever you are.

141
00:07:45,469 --> 00:07:47,765
It's awesome.
There's a little more to it.

142
00:07:47,836 --> 00:07:49,200
All right. Next.

143
00:07:49,270 --> 00:07:50,997
Ryan.
No. Don't.

144
00:07:55,869 --> 00:07:58,062
Whoa, a video iPod.

145
00:07:58,136 --> 00:08:00,261
Whoa. Wow. Jeez.

146
00:08:00,736 --> 00:08:04,225
Somebody really got carried away
with the spirit of Christmas.

147
00:08:04,303 --> 00:08:06,495
That was me. I got carried
away with the spirit.

148
00:08:06,569 --> 00:08:09,161
Wasn't there a
$20 limit on the gift?

149
00:08:10,003 --> 00:08:11,662
This is 400 bucks.

150
00:08:11,802 --> 00:08:13,200
You don't know that.

151
00:08:13,270 --> 00:08:14,428
Yeah, you left
the price tag on.

152
00:08:14,502 --> 00:08:15,525
I did?
Yeah.

153
00:08:15,602 --> 00:08:17,296
What? Oh, shoot. Wow.

154
00:08:17,370 --> 00:08:20,268
Okay, well, who cares? It
doesn't matter what I spent.

155
00:08:20,336 --> 00:08:23,325
What matters is that
Christmas is fun, right?

156
00:08:24,869 --> 00:08:27,858
Michael.
Oh, hey, for me.

157
00:08:28,736 --> 00:08:31,600
What is in here?

158
00:08:33,536 --> 00:08:35,002
Oh, come on.

159
00:08:35,069 --> 00:08:36,500
I knitted it for you.

160
00:08:37,369 --> 00:08:38,858
An oven mitt?

161
00:08:39,669 --> 00:08:40,794
Okay.

162
00:08:42,502 --> 00:08:44,059
So Phyllis is
basically saying,

163
00:08:44,136 --> 00:08:46,624
"Hey, Michael, I know you did a
lot to help the office this year

164
00:08:46,702 --> 00:08:50,260
"but I only care about you
a homemade oven mitt's worth. "

165
00:08:50,336 --> 00:08:52,097
I gave Ryan an iPod.

166
00:08:55,669 --> 00:08:58,999
Should we just keep
opening up the presents?

167
00:08:59,069 --> 00:09:03,058
We don't do anything until Michael
gives us further instructions.

168
00:09:06,702 --> 00:09:07,861
I got it.

169
00:09:07,936 --> 00:09:10,095
We are going to turn

170
00:09:10,170 --> 00:09:13,431
Secret Santa into Yankee Swap.

171
00:09:13,669 --> 00:09:15,101
What is Yankee Swap?

172
00:09:15,170 --> 00:09:17,567
One person chooses a gift.

173
00:09:17,636 --> 00:09:22,534
The next person can either choose
a gift or steal that person's gift.

174
00:09:22,936 --> 00:09:26,527
If your gift gets stolen, then
you can steal someone else's gift

175
00:09:26,602 --> 00:09:28,000
or choose a new gift.

176
00:09:28,069 --> 00:09:29,796
I thought that was
called Nasty Christmas.

177
00:09:29,869 --> 00:09:31,494
Yeah, we call it
White Elephant.

178
00:09:31,569 --> 00:09:33,263
Well, I call it fun!

179
00:09:33,335 --> 00:09:34,562
Why are we doing this?

180
00:09:34,636 --> 00:09:36,568
Because it's better.
Because it's more special.

181
00:09:36,636 --> 00:09:38,102
It sounds mean.
Shut it.

182
00:09:38,170 --> 00:09:39,795
No, it's not...

183
00:09:39,869 --> 00:09:41,199
Okay, just give it a shot.

184
00:09:41,270 --> 00:09:44,202
Michael should have asked the
party planning committee first.

185
00:09:44,270 --> 00:09:48,326
He's not supposed to just spring
things on us out of nowhere.

186
00:09:53,036 --> 00:09:56,593
Okay, Meredith is up first.
Here's the deal.

187
00:09:56,702 --> 00:09:58,497
You can either pick a new gift

188
00:09:58,569 --> 00:10:00,865
or you can steal
somebody else's gift

189
00:10:00,936 --> 00:10:03,164
that they've already gotten,
like the oven mitt.

190
00:10:03,702 --> 00:10:05,032
I'll take the teapot.

191
00:10:05,103 --> 00:10:06,864
Oh. Shouldn't we...

192
00:10:07,802 --> 00:10:10,529
I bought that specifically
for Pam. Yankee Swap!

193
00:10:10,602 --> 00:10:11,966
That's what makes it fun.

194
00:10:12,036 --> 00:10:14,900
Pam, you can steal the oven
mitt now. I'll take the iPod.

195
00:10:14,969 --> 00:10:17,231
And I have to give it to her?
I don't have a choice?

196
00:10:17,302 --> 00:10:19,461
Yes. Now, you can
steal the oven mitt,

197
00:10:19,536 --> 00:10:22,900
the old shirt or the shower
radio or pick a new gift.

198
00:10:34,602 --> 00:10:37,466
That was meant for Kelly.
Yeah, I figured.

199
00:10:42,502 --> 00:10:44,627
I think this is going great.

200
00:10:53,037 --> 00:10:54,196
Yikes.

201
00:10:54,503 --> 00:10:56,628
Well, it's for Angela, so...

202
00:10:59,603 --> 00:11:01,967
That's, like, the creepiest
thing that I've ever seen.

203
00:11:02,037 --> 00:11:03,696
Angela, you're up.

204
00:11:06,804 --> 00:11:08,599
I'll take the poster.

205
00:11:11,303 --> 00:11:13,201
Some people like these.

206
00:11:13,370 --> 00:11:15,393
I will steal the iPod.

207
00:11:16,336 --> 00:11:17,597
Everyone wants the iPod.

208
00:11:17,670 --> 00:11:21,295
It's a huge hit. It is
almost a Christmas miracle.

209
00:11:22,071 --> 00:11:27,026
Oh, well, Oscar, you little
gourmand, you have the next turn.

210
00:11:27,104 --> 00:11:31,331
I'll take the teapot.
Damn it.

211
00:11:31,837 --> 00:11:34,462
Okay. Moving along,
Meredith, let's go.

212
00:11:34,570 --> 00:11:36,036
I really want the iPod.

213
00:11:37,303 --> 00:11:39,701
It's already been stolen this
round. Pick something else.

214
00:11:39,770 --> 00:11:42,793
I hope nobody takes this baby,
'cause this is great.

215
00:11:42,870 --> 00:11:45,495
Wow, look at that
fine craftsmanship.

216
00:11:46,904 --> 00:11:50,233
Somebody really put a lot of
work into that. It's beautiful.

217
00:11:50,303 --> 00:11:52,269
I'll take the oven mitt.

218
00:11:53,637 --> 00:11:55,193
Sucker!

219
00:11:56,570 --> 00:12:00,161
See, I wanted somebody to take
it. Boom! Reverse psychology.

220
00:12:00,236 --> 00:12:02,828
Reverse psychology
is an awesome tool.

221
00:12:03,270 --> 00:12:05,134
I don't know if you guys
know about it,

222
00:12:05,203 --> 00:12:09,898
but basically you make someone think
the opposite of what you believe

223
00:12:10,137 --> 00:12:13,466
and that tricks them
into doing something stupid.

224
00:12:13,970 --> 00:12:15,230
Works like a charm.

225
00:12:22,071 --> 00:12:23,764
"In addition to these
paint ball pellets,

226
00:12:23,837 --> 00:12:27,325
"your gift includes two paint
ball lessons with Dwight Shrute. "

227
00:12:27,403 --> 00:12:29,733
You and me, Michael. Yes.

228
00:12:33,570 --> 00:12:37,832
Who wants to take paint ball lessons?
How is that better than an iPod?

229
00:12:37,904 --> 00:12:40,631
I never said it was
better than an iPod.

230
00:12:43,236 --> 00:12:46,566
Michael keeps bragging about
his iPod, but you know what?

231
00:12:46,637 --> 00:12:49,194
Two paint ball lessons with
someone as experienced as I am

232
00:12:49,270 --> 00:12:51,498
is worth easily,
like, 2 grand.

233
00:12:52,037 --> 00:12:53,730
Take that, Saddam.

234
00:12:53,904 --> 00:12:55,460
Last gift, Kevin.

235
00:12:55,537 --> 00:12:57,127
I want the foot bath.

236
00:13:00,503 --> 00:13:02,298
That's the thing
I bought myself.

237
00:13:02,570 --> 00:13:04,798
I'm really psyched to use it.

238
00:13:07,236 --> 00:13:09,725
Maybe I should have
taken the iPod.

239
00:13:11,703 --> 00:13:13,328
Oh, shoot.

240
00:13:14,203 --> 00:13:16,931
Pam, steal something
or pick the final gift.

241
00:13:17,004 --> 00:13:19,333
I want the iPod.
Damn it.

242
00:13:19,403 --> 00:13:21,596
Sure you don't want
the teapot?

243
00:13:21,670 --> 00:13:24,534
Well, I mean, it's
an iPod. But... Right.

244
00:13:24,603 --> 00:13:26,967
Sorry, I...
No. No. Definitely. It's...

245
00:13:27,037 --> 00:13:31,765
Okay, well, I guess I will
take that book of short stories.

246
00:13:32,136 --> 00:13:36,193
Yes! There you go.
I want the tea pot. Gracias.

247
00:13:37,470 --> 00:13:38,561
Got to be kidding me.

248
00:13:38,904 --> 00:13:43,165
Yankee Swap is like
Machiavelli meets

249
00:13:45,737 --> 00:13:46,828
Christmas.

250
00:13:48,670 --> 00:13:49,966
What is she so upset about?

251
00:13:50,037 --> 00:13:51,969
Maybe because you hated
her present so much.

252
00:13:52,037 --> 00:13:54,264
Come on! I think that
Yankee Swap was a big hit.

253
00:13:54,336 --> 00:13:55,768
I think it was a success,

254
00:13:55,837 --> 00:13:58,496
and I'm the one who ended up with
Dwight's stupid paint ball pellets.

255
00:13:58,570 --> 00:14:01,934
Yeah, but, Michael, the point is that
we all bought gifts for specific people.

256
00:14:02,004 --> 00:14:04,663
And you should have just bought
a $20 gift like everyone else.

257
00:14:04,737 --> 00:14:05,862
Well, I didn't.

258
00:14:05,937 --> 00:14:08,494
I got a big bonus
because I fired Devon,

259
00:14:08,570 --> 00:14:11,968
and I used the money to buy
something awesome. Sue me!

260
00:14:13,370 --> 00:14:15,165
You got a bonus check?

261
00:14:15,303 --> 00:14:16,564
How much?

262
00:14:17,537 --> 00:14:21,333
It wasn't... It wasn't
that much. It was $3,000.

263
00:14:21,403 --> 00:14:23,392
All right, I'm done now.

264
00:14:26,837 --> 00:14:27,996
Unbelievable.

265
00:14:28,070 --> 00:14:30,696
I do the nicest thing that anyone
has ever done for these people,

266
00:14:30,770 --> 00:14:31,895
and they freak out.

267
00:14:31,970 --> 00:14:35,527
Well, happy birthday, Jesus.
Sorry your party's so lame.

268
00:14:38,937 --> 00:14:40,903
It comes to $166.41.

269
00:14:40,970 --> 00:14:45,299
All right, now, you're the expert. Is
this enough to get 20 people plastered?

270
00:14:46,270 --> 00:14:48,327
Fifteen bottles of vodka?

271
00:14:48,970 --> 00:14:52,129
Yeah, that should do it.
Cool, cool. Box it up.

272
00:15:01,538 --> 00:15:04,368
I bought this teapot for Pam,
and I know she really wants it.

273
00:15:04,438 --> 00:15:06,267
So, can I trade you for it?
No trades.

274
00:15:06,337 --> 00:15:09,269
Come on. It's a shamrock
keychain. Good luck.

275
00:15:09,571 --> 00:15:13,128
"A real man makes his own
luck. " Billy Zane, Titanic.

276
00:15:13,204 --> 00:15:16,568
Look it has sentimental value,
Dwight. Can I buy it from you?

277
00:15:16,638 --> 00:15:18,604
No. I want it.
I'm going to use it.

278
00:15:18,671 --> 00:15:20,296
You don't even drink tea.
True.

279
00:15:20,371 --> 00:15:23,531
But I get sinus infections, and
sinus infections can be cured

280
00:15:23,604 --> 00:15:25,570
by making your tea
from green tea leaf stems...

281
00:15:25,638 --> 00:15:26,934
Okay.
and pouring it directly

282
00:15:27,004 --> 00:15:28,561
into your nose, like so.

283
00:15:31,937 --> 00:15:35,392
To think that my gift to Pam
will be used for that,

284
00:15:36,304 --> 00:15:38,497
it's a little
too much to handle.

285
00:15:38,571 --> 00:15:39,764
This is awesome.

286
00:15:39,838 --> 00:15:42,395
I know. It's totally gonna
change the way I work out.

287
00:15:42,471 --> 00:15:45,994
Yeah, I was gonna get you one of these
for Christmas, now I don't have to.

288
00:15:46,071 --> 00:15:47,230
I'm gonna save a ton of money.

289
00:15:47,304 --> 00:15:48,634
So what are you
gonna get me instead?

290
00:15:48,704 --> 00:15:51,329
I don't know. Probably, like,
a sweater or something.

291
00:15:54,638 --> 00:15:55,626
Uh-oh.

292
00:15:55,738 --> 00:15:58,863
Looks like Santa
was a little naughty.

293
00:16:00,371 --> 00:16:01,803
What is that?

294
00:16:01,871 --> 00:16:05,860
This is Christmas spirit,
as in spirits, booze.

295
00:16:06,204 --> 00:16:07,636
We can drink?

296
00:16:07,704 --> 00:16:09,795
We're really not supposed
to serve alcohol.

297
00:16:09,871 --> 00:16:13,132
Zip it, Toby! Just...
I mean, it's a party. Come on.

298
00:16:13,204 --> 00:16:17,227
If I can't throw a good party for my
employees, then I am a terrible boss.

299
00:16:18,504 --> 00:16:19,969
Who wants a drink?
Me. Please.

300
00:16:20,037 --> 00:16:21,594
Go! Here we go!

301
00:16:23,137 --> 00:16:25,160
The deal is that
this is my last hurrah,

302
00:16:25,237 --> 00:16:27,669
'cause I made a
New Year's resolution

303
00:16:27,738 --> 00:16:31,033
that I'm not gonna drink
anymore during the week.

304
00:16:31,471 --> 00:16:33,061
Hi, guys.
Hey.

305
00:16:33,137 --> 00:16:35,729
Does everyone know
my boyfriend, Bob Vance?

306
00:16:35,805 --> 00:16:38,862
Kevin Malone. Bob Vance,
Vance Refrigeration.

307
00:16:38,937 --> 00:16:41,836
Stanley Hudson. Bob
Vance, Vance Refrigeration.

308
00:16:41,904 --> 00:16:44,803
Ryan Howard. Bob Vance,
Vance Refrigeration.

309
00:16:46,471 --> 00:16:48,699
What line of work you in, Bob?

310
00:16:49,104 --> 00:16:52,229
I think after I lost Culpepper
and T.O. It was over, man.

311
00:16:52,304 --> 00:16:54,099
Oh, yeah,
I need McMahon,

312
00:16:54,171 --> 00:16:56,694
Deion Branch to have big
games, or else I'm done.

313
00:16:56,771 --> 00:16:57,828
It's possible.

314
00:16:57,904 --> 00:16:59,837
I can't believe you
traded Shaun Alexander, man.

315
00:16:59,904 --> 00:17:01,131
I had to,
I needed defense.

316
00:17:01,204 --> 00:17:02,602
Come on! Shaun Alexander?

317
00:17:02,671 --> 00:17:04,932
He's the best back in
the league. It's defense.

318
00:17:05,004 --> 00:17:07,664
Oh, no. That's not
worth it. It is worth it.

319
00:17:07,738 --> 00:17:09,896
Never. Are you kidding? You wait.

320
00:17:09,970 --> 00:17:14,164
Anybody making out in here?
Not yet. Give it time.

321
00:17:14,538 --> 00:17:16,561
Oh, hey, Ebenezer, boink.

322
00:17:16,638 --> 00:17:18,433
Okay, how's it going in here?

323
00:17:18,504 --> 00:17:20,867
We're running low on cups. Do you
want me to just run out and get some?

324
00:17:20,937 --> 00:17:22,062
Yeah, there should be some...
No, no, no.

325
00:17:22,137 --> 00:17:23,728
We'll find some.
Don't leave the party.

326
00:17:23,805 --> 00:17:26,236
One, two, three!

327
00:17:31,304 --> 00:17:33,600
Kudos to Ryan,
king of the party committee.

328
00:17:33,671 --> 00:17:34,863
Oh, no.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

329
00:17:34,937 --> 00:17:36,301
I really did not do anything.

330
00:17:36,371 --> 00:17:38,530
Oh, no, no.
No false modesty, my friend.

331
00:17:42,937 --> 00:17:45,563
You know, you don't have to
answer calls during a party.

332
00:17:45,638 --> 00:17:47,160
Just thought you should know.

333
00:17:47,237 --> 00:17:50,135
No, I was just
checking out my present.

334
00:17:52,671 --> 00:17:54,898
But...
I traded with Dwight.

335
00:17:56,471 --> 00:17:58,164
Just, I figured, you know,

336
00:17:58,237 --> 00:18:00,669
you went to a lot of trouble
and it means a lot.

337
00:18:02,204 --> 00:18:05,102
And also, Roy got me an iPod

338
00:18:06,037 --> 00:18:08,469
or was going to
get me an iPod, so...

339
00:18:08,837 --> 00:18:10,463
Well, either way.

340
00:18:11,604 --> 00:18:15,036
This is an amazing gift because
it comes with bonus gifts.

341
00:18:16,104 --> 00:18:17,502
Look inside.

342
00:18:22,404 --> 00:18:26,836
Oh, my God!
The yearbook picture.

343
00:18:27,037 --> 00:18:29,663
Yeah, I think
I made the right choice.

344
00:18:30,804 --> 00:18:34,032
Oh, my God! It's incredible.

345
00:18:34,104 --> 00:18:35,331
Is this the bottle timer?

346
00:18:35,404 --> 00:18:37,393
I didn't think you were gonna
get that one. I really didn't.

347
00:18:39,671 --> 00:18:41,398
This is so awesome.

348
00:18:41,571 --> 00:18:45,196
Not bad. And if it couldn't go to Ryan,
you are the guy I'd want it to go to.

349
00:18:45,271 --> 00:18:46,464
Thank you.
You're welcome.

350
00:18:46,538 --> 00:18:48,901
Merry Christmas, asswipe.
No way.

351
00:18:48,970 --> 00:18:52,198
Oh, you're kidding me. Packer!

352
00:18:52,704 --> 00:18:56,033
Yes! Todd Packer,
ladies and gentlemen.

353
00:18:56,171 --> 00:18:58,729
What's up, my nerds?
Check it out!

354
00:18:58,804 --> 00:19:03,203
Oh, no, no. Oh, look at that.
Icing on the cake.

355
00:19:03,770 --> 00:19:06,430
Pacman need a drinky.
Oh, let's fix you up.

356
00:19:06,504 --> 00:19:09,436
Who wants to fix up... Toby?
Toby's gonna fix you up.

357
00:19:10,237 --> 00:19:11,362
Yeah.

358
00:19:15,837 --> 00:19:18,269
Darryl. There you go.

359
00:19:18,337 --> 00:19:19,962
You earned it.
That's okay, Mike.

360
00:19:20,037 --> 00:19:23,197
No, no, no, no. I really,
really want you to have it.

361
00:19:23,271 --> 00:19:25,134
All right. Thanks, man.

362
00:19:25,204 --> 00:19:26,999
Hey, Merry Christmas.

363
00:19:29,304 --> 00:19:31,929
Whose butt is that?
Mine.

364
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:34,266
Oh, how did I not guess that?

365
00:19:34,337 --> 00:19:38,394
Lampshade on head!
It's happening!

366
00:19:39,304 --> 00:19:40,497
Oh, no.

367
00:19:49,037 --> 00:19:51,299
Hey.
Oh, hello there.

368
00:19:54,071 --> 00:19:57,037
But what are you doing?
I don't know.

369
00:19:57,404 --> 00:20:00,632
You shouldn't do things like that.
The man is supposed to do that.

370
00:20:13,970 --> 00:20:15,902
Thanks for the party, Michael.
Yeah.

371
00:20:15,970 --> 00:20:18,198
Oh, hey... Listen up. We're
going to Poor Richard's.

372
00:20:18,271 --> 00:20:19,396
Who's in?
I'm in.

373
00:20:19,471 --> 00:20:20,596
Yes.

374
00:20:20,670 --> 00:20:22,829
Michael?
Poor Richard's?

375
00:20:24,037 --> 00:20:25,628
Yeah. That sounds good.

376
00:20:25,703 --> 00:20:27,533
Christmas is awesome.

377
00:20:28,137 --> 00:20:31,899
First of all, you get to spend
time with people you love.

378
00:20:31,970 --> 00:20:35,663
Secondly, you can get drunk
and no one can say anything.

379
00:20:35,737 --> 00:20:39,465
Third, you give presents. What's
better than giving presents?

380
00:20:39,538 --> 00:20:43,493
And fourth, getting presents. So,
four things. Not bad for one day.

381
00:20:43,571 --> 00:20:46,695
It's really the
greatest day of all time.

382
00:20:49,404 --> 00:20:50,597
Hey, Meredith.

383
00:20:50,670 --> 00:20:52,727
Heading over to Poor Richard's? Yep.

384
00:20:52,804 --> 00:20:56,032
Cool, cool, cool.
Do you need a ride?

385
00:21:06,037 --> 00:21:08,060
All right, let's head out.

386
00:21:08,837 --> 00:21:11,769
Sounds good. Do you have a coat? Yeah.

387
00:21:11,837 --> 00:21:13,133
Okay!

388
00:21:13,899 --> 00:21:23,889
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