1
00:00:01,539 --> 00:00:03,038
Jim, could you
come in here, please?

2
00:00:09,206 --> 00:00:10,938
Hi, Jim.

3
00:00:10,940 --> 00:00:11,938
Hello.

4
00:00:11,940 --> 00:00:14,704
I am Harvey, a computer.

5
00:00:14,706 --> 00:00:17,538
Jim sucks.

6
00:00:17,540 --> 00:00:19,438
Sorry.
Zing.

7
00:00:19,440 --> 00:00:20,738
Oh, wow.

8
00:00:20,740 --> 00:00:22,338
That's so rude.

9
00:00:22,340 --> 00:00:23,838
I'm sorry, I can't control him.

10
00:00:23,840 --> 00:00:25,105
Yeah, you can.

11
00:00:25,107 --> 00:00:26,871
You know what? Get Pam.
For this?

12
00:00:26,873 --> 00:00:28,505
Pam.

13
00:00:29,805 --> 00:00:34,171
Pam, you look very hot today.

14
00:00:36,172 --> 00:00:37,405
Pam, meet Harvey.

15
00:00:37,407 --> 00:00:38,804
This is Michael's new friend.
Great.

16
00:00:38,806 --> 00:00:41,938
Me so horny.
Me love you long tim.

17
00:00:41,940 --> 00:00:42,938
Whoa.

18
00:00:42,940 --> 00:00:45,071
Oh, that is gross!

19
00:00:45,073 --> 00:00:46,338
Who is "Long Tim"?

20
00:00:46,340 --> 00:00:47,971
Damn it.

21
00:00:50,540 --> 00:00:51,538
Long time.

22
00:00:51,540 --> 00:00:52,771
Me love you a long time.

23
00:00:52,773 --> 00:00:55,105
Oh, well, Yoy should
bring Long Tim in one day.

24
00:00:55,107 --> 00:00:56,472
I'd love to meet Long Tim.

25
00:00:56,474 --> 00:00:58,005
Yeah, right?
Yeah.

26
00:00:58,007 --> 00:00:59,538
You ruined a funny joke.

27
00:00:59,540 --> 00:01:01,838
You get out
of my off-five.

28
00:01:01,840 --> 00:01:03,905
Okay.
Okay.

29
00:01:03,907 --> 00:01:04,971
Bye, Harvey.

30
00:01:08,472 --> 00:01:11,071
Boobs.

31
00:01:12,468 --> 00:01:18,535
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today

32
00:01:39,039 --> 00:01:40,671
Angela.
What?

33
00:01:40,673 --> 00:01:43,604
That was a voice mail
that corporate left last night.

34
00:01:43,606 --> 00:01:45,305
They did not get our tax forms.

35
00:01:45,307 --> 00:01:48,038
Did you send them?

36
00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:49,704
They arrived this morning.

37
00:01:49,706 --> 00:01:51,238
Are you sure?

38
00:01:51,240 --> 00:01:53,038
It is a big deal.

39
00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:55,571
Is it a big deal?
Is it, Kevin?

40
00:01:57,306 --> 00:01:59,338
Do you really not know?

41
00:01:59,340 --> 00:02:01,205
Because it is a big deal.

42
00:02:02,505 --> 00:02:05,272
Five of us transferred
from Stamford.

43
00:02:05,274 --> 00:02:06,372
There's two of us left.

44
00:02:06,374 --> 00:02:08,838
Me and Karen.

45
00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:11,738
It's like we're touring
Willy Wonka's chocolate factory,

46
00:02:11,740 --> 00:02:14,338
and dropping off one by one.

47
00:02:14,340 --> 00:02:16,305
Well, guess what.

48
00:02:16,307 --> 00:02:18,971
I'm not falling
in a chocolate river.

49
00:02:24,907 --> 00:02:27,138
Everything okay?

50
00:02:27,140 --> 00:02:29,005
Just fine.

51
00:02:29,007 --> 00:02:30,171
You are in the clear.

52
00:02:30,173 --> 00:02:31,604
Thank you.

53
00:02:37,339 --> 00:02:39,471
I don't...
I don't want those.

54
00:02:41,639 --> 00:02:42,838
Dwight,

55
00:02:42,840 --> 00:02:44,305
care to join us, finally?

56
00:02:44,307 --> 00:02:46,338
Thank you.

57
00:02:46,340 --> 00:02:48,671
Hey, Dwight,
pass the tardy sauce.

58
00:02:48,673 --> 00:02:49,838
Get it, Michael?

59
00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:50,804
Yes.

60
00:02:50,806 --> 00:02:54,205
Okay, here is the dream team.

61
00:02:54,207 --> 00:02:56,138
My sales dream team.

62
00:02:56,140 --> 00:02:58,038
Today we are going to
team up for sales calls.

63
00:02:58,040 --> 00:03:00,437
Andy, since this was your idea,

64
00:03:00,439 --> 00:03:01,437
you get to pick first.

65
00:03:01,439 --> 00:03:03,738
Hmm, well,

66
00:03:03,740 --> 00:03:06,272
let me think about this
for a minute.

67
00:03:06,274 --> 00:03:09,371
Oh, I don't know...
Michael Scott.

68
00:03:09,373 --> 00:03:11,005
Oh.
PhD.

69
00:03:11,007 --> 00:03:13,038
Doctor of sales.

70
00:03:13,040 --> 00:03:14,171
Well, I appreciate that.

71
00:03:14,173 --> 00:03:15,205
That's very gracious of you.

72
00:03:15,207 --> 00:03:17,604
Well it is very gracious
of you to accept.

73
00:03:17,606 --> 00:03:19,871
Well, thank you, sir.

74
00:03:19,873 --> 00:03:22,771
Okay, now going by seniority,

75
00:03:22,773 --> 00:03:24,938
Phyllis, our resident senior.

76
00:03:24,940 --> 00:03:27,471
We're the same age.

77
00:03:27,473 --> 00:03:29,504
And I'll pick Karen.

78
00:03:29,506 --> 00:03:31,971
Oh, uh, thanks.

79
00:03:31,973 --> 00:03:33,804
Good.

80
00:03:33,806 --> 00:03:36,171
Next up, the Super Fly himself,

81
00:03:36,173 --> 00:03:37,171
Stanley.

82
00:03:37,173 --> 00:03:38,238
Pass.

83
00:03:38,240 --> 00:03:40,738
You can't pass.
You gotta pick somebody.

84
00:03:43,906 --> 00:03:46,638
I'll take the kid.

85
00:03:46,640 --> 00:03:48,272
I'm very flattered.

86
00:03:48,274 --> 00:03:51,471
I was his second choice,
after "pass."

87
00:03:51,473 --> 00:03:54,171
So that just leaves
Dwight and Jim.

88
00:03:54,173 --> 00:03:55,971
Okay, wait, does anyone
want to trade?

89
00:03:55,973 --> 00:03:58,604
Yeah, I'll trade.

90
00:03:58,606 --> 00:04:00,771
Dwight and I used to
go on sales calls all the time.

91
00:04:00,773 --> 00:04:04,504
In fact, I have a picture
to remember that time.

92
00:04:04,506 --> 00:04:06,171
Oh, young Jim.

93
00:04:06,173 --> 00:04:10,071
There's just so much
I need to warn you about.

94
00:04:10,073 --> 00:04:15,005
And yet, tragically, I cannot.

95
00:04:15,007 --> 00:04:17,304
Sebring, by Chrysler.

96
00:04:17,306 --> 00:04:20,038
A heck of a motor carriage.

97
00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:23,138
Dwight, here ya go!

98
00:04:23,140 --> 00:04:24,404
Yeah!

99
00:04:24,406 --> 00:04:26,138
You want shirts on hangers?
Please.

100
00:04:26,140 --> 00:04:27,337
He does your laundry?

101
00:04:27,339 --> 00:04:30,005
Long story.

102
00:04:30,007 --> 00:04:31,171
All right, everybody, circle up.

103
00:04:31,173 --> 00:04:33,671
Here we go.

104
00:04:33,673 --> 00:04:35,304
You know that this is?

105
00:04:35,306 --> 00:04:36,871
This is the Amazing Race.

106
00:04:36,873 --> 00:04:39,105
And you guys are
the retired marines.

107
00:04:39,107 --> 00:04:41,838
And you guys are
the mother/daughter.

108
00:04:41,840 --> 00:04:43,671
And you guys are the gay couple.

109
00:04:43,673 --> 00:04:45,638
And we are
the firefighter heroes.

110
00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:47,038
Are we ready to go?

111
00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:50,638
Wait, Amazing Race, like,
the biggest sale wins?

112
00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:52,271
No, we're just gonna rush out,

113
00:04:52,273 --> 00:04:53,671
do the sales thing,
and come back.

114
00:04:53,673 --> 00:04:54,838
Is there a prize?

115
00:04:54,840 --> 00:04:56,038
Just bragging rights.

116
00:04:56,040 --> 00:04:57,437
Then how is this Amazing Race?

117
00:04:57,439 --> 00:04:59,071
It's just... brrrrr.

118
00:04:59,073 --> 00:05:01,804
It's Amazing Race,
Phyllis, okay?

119
00:05:01,806 --> 00:05:04,171
We're in teams of two,
and we are on a mission.

120
00:05:04,173 --> 00:05:06,704
All right, so, on your mark,

121
00:05:06,706 --> 00:05:07,738
get set, go.

122
00:05:07,740 --> 00:05:09,671
Let's do it.
Come on!

123
00:05:14,238 --> 00:05:16,205
Michael...
Whoa, whoa.

124
00:05:16,207 --> 00:05:17,838
Oh, ho ho ho!

125
00:05:17,840 --> 00:05:19,871
Vamanos.
Bueno.

126
00:05:19,873 --> 00:05:22,971
Do you have a pole?

127
00:05:22,973 --> 00:05:24,437
Let's go get a broom.

128
00:05:24,439 --> 00:05:27,105
Seriously, you're gonna sit
in the back?

129
00:05:27,107 --> 00:05:28,304
Uh, yeah.

130
00:05:28,306 --> 00:05:29,804
It's the safest part of a car.

131
00:05:29,806 --> 00:05:31,071
In the event of a crash,

132
00:05:31,073 --> 00:05:33,771
the driver always
protects his side first.

133
00:05:37,972 --> 00:05:40,271
Here we go.
Whoo!

134
00:05:40,273 --> 00:05:41,671
In order to take down Dwight,

135
00:05:41,673 --> 00:05:43,404
I have to chip away at his ally.

136
00:05:43,406 --> 00:05:44,538
In this case, Michael.

137
00:05:44,540 --> 00:05:46,404
And here's the good news.

138
00:05:46,406 --> 00:05:48,304
Every success I've ever had,

139
00:05:48,306 --> 00:05:51,138
in my job, or with
the lady folk,

140
00:05:51,140 --> 00:05:53,105
has come from my ability

141
00:05:53,107 --> 00:05:55,105
to slowly and painfully

142
00:05:55,107 --> 00:05:58,271
wear someone down.

143
00:05:58,273 --> 00:06:00,138
What's the deal with Dwight
doing your laundry?

144
00:06:00,140 --> 00:06:03,771
That is a long story.

145
00:06:03,773 --> 00:06:07,304
Um, a couple months ago,

146
00:06:07,306 --> 00:06:10,071
Dwight tried to
go behind my back with Jan

147
00:06:10,073 --> 00:06:12,204
and get my job.

148
00:06:12,206 --> 00:06:15,138
And I am now having him
do my laundry as punishment.

149
00:06:15,140 --> 00:06:18,170
Wow, that is a long story,

150
00:06:18,172 --> 00:06:20,404
but quite well told, Michael.

151
00:06:20,406 --> 00:06:22,437
I find it very interesting.

152
00:06:22,439 --> 00:06:24,271
Especially the part about Dwight

153
00:06:24,273 --> 00:06:25,871
going behind your back,

154
00:06:25,873 --> 00:06:30,337
and basically being,
like, a terrible person.

155
00:06:30,339 --> 00:06:33,170
You know, if you want
your laundry done right,

156
00:06:33,172 --> 00:06:34,971
I used to work at Abercrombie.

157
00:06:34,973 --> 00:06:37,905
So... pretty good folder.

158
00:06:39,872 --> 00:06:41,271
Why are we turning in here?

159
00:06:41,273 --> 00:06:42,571
This is a beauty salon.

160
00:06:42,573 --> 00:06:44,704
Mm-hmm.

161
00:06:44,706 --> 00:06:46,638
Hey, do you mind
if I take the lead

162
00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:47,638
on this one?

163
00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:49,237
And then, you can
critique me after.

164
00:06:49,239 --> 00:06:50,871
You want the lead?

165
00:06:50,873 --> 00:06:52,237
Yeah, if you don't mind.

166
00:06:52,239 --> 00:06:53,471
Mind?

167
00:06:53,473 --> 00:06:55,237
Nothing would delight me more.

168
00:07:02,739 --> 00:07:04,971
Hey, Pam, would you like
to go with me

169
00:07:04,973 --> 00:07:05,971
to grab a coffee?

170
00:07:05,973 --> 00:07:08,005
Really?

171
00:07:08,007 --> 00:07:09,137
Yeah.

172
00:07:09,139 --> 00:07:10,471
I thought you could use
some fresh air.

173
00:07:10,473 --> 00:07:12,137
It might be fun.

174
00:07:12,139 --> 00:07:13,971
Okay, sure.

175
00:07:13,973 --> 00:07:15,337
Okay.

176
00:07:22,505 --> 00:07:23,838
Leave the keys.

177
00:07:23,840 --> 00:07:25,304
You still do that thing?

178
00:07:25,306 --> 00:07:27,237
Leave the keys.

179
00:07:46,472 --> 00:07:48,071
I think that you have assembled

180
00:07:48,072 --> 00:07:50,604
an amazing team in Scranton.

181
00:07:50,606 --> 00:07:52,237
It's really a pleasure
to be a part of it.

182
00:07:52,239 --> 00:07:54,671
It's like everyone has
their own special skill.

183
00:07:54,673 --> 00:07:57,337
You know, just like
the Super Friends.

184
00:07:57,339 --> 00:07:58,971
Except for Dwight,

185
00:07:58,973 --> 00:08:01,571
who's kind of more of
a super dud.

186
00:08:01,573 --> 00:08:03,471
I mean, he'd be a Super Friend,

187
00:08:03,473 --> 00:08:06,005
if there was a Super Friend
whose super power was

188
00:08:06,007 --> 00:08:07,471
always being late.

189
00:08:07,473 --> 00:08:09,905
You know?

190
00:08:09,907 --> 00:08:12,771
Hawkman.

191
00:08:14,472 --> 00:08:16,804
My plan is taking longer
than I thought.

192
00:08:16,806 --> 00:08:19,337
But I don't give up easily.

193
00:08:19,339 --> 00:08:22,638
I have walked
two marathons, so...

194
00:08:23,873 --> 00:08:26,137
Let's go.

195
00:08:28,539 --> 00:08:31,104
The men's room was disgusting.

196
00:08:34,472 --> 00:08:35,504
After you, sir.

197
00:08:35,506 --> 00:08:36,538
No, thank you.

198
00:08:36,540 --> 00:08:37,638
I never let anyone
walk behind me.

199
00:08:37,640 --> 00:08:39,471
Seven out of ten attacks
are from the rear.

200
00:08:39,473 --> 00:08:40,804
Okay, well, that still leaves

201
00:08:40,806 --> 00:08:42,871
a 30% chance that I'll
attack you from the front.

202
00:08:42,873 --> 00:08:44,804
Yeah, but it'll be
easier to stop.

203
00:08:44,806 --> 00:08:46,304
I can always block the blow.

204
00:08:46,306 --> 00:08:48,337
Or I can counter...

205
00:08:55,405 --> 00:08:57,571
Hey, did you catch that

206
00:08:57,573 --> 00:08:59,070
up in Lake Wallenpaupack?

207
00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:00,304
Yep.

208
00:09:00,306 --> 00:09:02,004
You know, I used to
go up there all the time

209
00:09:02,006 --> 00:09:03,070
with my stepdad,

210
00:09:03,072 --> 00:09:04,804
and I never caught
anything that big.

211
00:09:04,806 --> 00:09:08,971
I caught an 80-pound shark
off Montauk.

212
00:09:08,973 --> 00:09:10,738
It's in the Hamptons.
Uh-huh.

213
00:09:10,740 --> 00:09:13,204
My dad's got
a 42-foot Bayliner.

214
00:09:13,206 --> 00:09:16,604
Sniped it with a rifle
from the crow's nest.

215
00:09:17,772 --> 00:09:19,437
Also shot a deer once.

216
00:09:19,439 --> 00:09:20,938
You know what?
Let's get right down to it.

217
00:09:20,940 --> 00:09:25,137
Dunder-Mifflin may be
just two rooms and a warehouse,

218
00:09:25,139 --> 00:09:26,504
but what we lack in flash,

219
00:09:26,506 --> 00:09:30,437
we will make up for
with hard work and decency...

220
00:09:30,439 --> 00:09:33,271
Okay, this is
the classic undersell.

221
00:09:33,273 --> 00:09:36,004
Because you should know

222
00:09:36,006 --> 00:09:37,504
we don't work
out of a log cabin.

223
00:09:37,506 --> 00:09:39,504
We trade on the New York
Stock Exchange.

224
00:09:39,506 --> 00:09:41,938
Ever heard of it?
It's in New York.

225
00:09:41,940 --> 00:09:44,704
I have to say I'm a little wary

226
00:09:44,706 --> 00:09:46,538
of getting involved
with a big company.

227
00:09:46,540 --> 00:09:48,337
We've had some problems
in the past.

228
00:09:48,339 --> 00:09:52,304
I think what Andy
is trying to express is that

229
00:09:52,306 --> 00:09:54,571
while we have the resources
of a large company,

230
00:09:54,573 --> 00:09:56,538
we will give you
the care and attention

231
00:09:56,540 --> 00:09:58,037
of a small company.

232
00:09:58,039 --> 00:10:00,704
Man, that is like poetry.

233
00:10:00,706 --> 00:10:01,938
No.

234
00:10:01,939 --> 00:10:03,504
I swear, this guy
could sell paper to a tree.

235
00:10:03,506 --> 00:10:04,804
No, stop it.
Stop.

236
00:10:04,806 --> 00:10:06,437
Ow.

237
00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:12,471
Oh, man, talk about
your classic lame-dash-o.

238
00:10:12,473 --> 00:10:15,504
Do we even want that guy
buying our paper?

239
00:10:15,506 --> 00:10:17,771
Yes.

240
00:10:17,773 --> 00:10:20,104
Angela, you seem so happy.

241
00:10:21,672 --> 00:10:24,638
I bet you wish you were
like this all the time.

242
00:10:24,640 --> 00:10:29,404
This friend of mine...
let's call her Noelle.

243
00:10:29,406 --> 00:10:32,271
She missed this deadline

244
00:10:32,273 --> 00:10:34,804
turning something in
to corporate in New York.

245
00:10:34,806 --> 00:10:37,904
But then this gallant
gentleman...

246
00:10:37,906 --> 00:10:38,937
we'll call him Curt.

247
00:10:38,939 --> 00:10:40,771
He drove all the way to New York

248
00:10:40,773 --> 00:10:42,638
and handed it in for her.

249
00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:45,104
Because... I don't know.

250
00:10:45,106 --> 00:10:47,371
I guess he just
really likes her a lot.

251
00:10:47,373 --> 00:10:49,671
Well, that's great.

252
00:10:49,673 --> 00:10:51,504
Yes, it is.

253
00:10:56,338 --> 00:10:57,471
Hello?

254
00:10:57,473 --> 00:11:00,604
I'm...
I'm so sorry, man.

255
00:11:02,839 --> 00:11:04,504
I really screwed that up.

256
00:11:04,506 --> 00:11:05,838
Oh...
Really... no.

257
00:11:05,840 --> 00:11:06,838
Don't worry about it.

258
00:11:06,840 --> 00:11:07,937
I really Schruted it.

259
00:11:07,939 --> 00:11:09,504
What?

260
00:11:09,506 --> 00:11:10,870
Schruted it.

261
00:11:10,872 --> 00:11:13,538
It just this thing people say
around your office all the time.

262
00:11:13,540 --> 00:11:15,170
Like when you screw something up

263
00:11:15,172 --> 00:11:17,404
in a really irreversible way,

264
00:11:17,406 --> 00:11:19,571
you Schruted it.

265
00:11:19,573 --> 00:11:21,970
I don't know where
it comes from, though.

266
00:11:21,972 --> 00:11:23,937
You think it comes
from Dwight Schrute?

267
00:11:23,939 --> 00:11:25,371
I don't know.

268
00:11:25,373 --> 00:11:28,204
Who knows how words are formed?

269
00:11:30,539 --> 00:11:31,904
That's a big order.
Thanks, Ken.

270
00:11:31,906 --> 00:11:32,904
Yeah, thank you.

271
00:11:32,906 --> 00:11:34,004
Hey, how's Annie?

272
00:11:34,006 --> 00:11:35,471
Oh, she's great.

273
00:11:35,473 --> 00:11:40,037
This is us last year in Bermuda.

274
00:11:41,539 --> 00:11:42,538
Lovely place.

275
00:11:42,540 --> 00:11:44,037
You ever been to Bermuda?

276
00:11:44,039 --> 00:11:45,437
Stanley Hudson.

277
00:11:45,439 --> 00:11:47,271
Ah, Julius.
How's it going?

278
00:11:47,273 --> 00:11:49,337
Great, great,
great, great, great.

279
00:11:49,339 --> 00:11:50,771
Stanley, so good to see you.

280
00:11:50,773 --> 00:11:52,104
You too.

281
00:11:52,106 --> 00:11:54,204
I'd like you fellas
to meet Ryan Howard.

282
00:11:54,206 --> 00:11:55,538
Hi.

283
00:11:55,540 --> 00:11:57,538
I'm gonna let Ryan
do a little pitch for you

284
00:11:57,540 --> 00:11:58,904
while I do my crossword puzzle.

285
00:11:58,906 --> 00:12:00,104
Ryan?

286
00:12:03,605 --> 00:12:06,504
Um...

287
00:12:08,505 --> 00:12:09,504
Hi.

288
00:12:09,506 --> 00:12:10,904
Hi.

289
00:12:10,906 --> 00:12:12,371
Hi.

290
00:12:12,373 --> 00:12:13,738
Hello, Ryan.
Hi.

291
00:12:13,740 --> 00:12:16,471
What do you have for us?

292
00:12:16,473 --> 00:12:18,004
Oh...

293
00:12:18,006 --> 00:12:19,471
We can offer
our biggest discounts

294
00:12:19,473 --> 00:12:22,104
on 30% recycled,
and ultra-premium laser.

295
00:12:22,106 --> 00:12:23,271
Okay.
Okay.

296
00:12:23,273 --> 00:12:25,004
Can I use your phone?

297
00:12:25,006 --> 00:12:26,704
Yeah, sure, go ahead.
Thanks.

298
00:12:26,706 --> 00:12:27,904
Let me talk to you about
a few of the other things

299
00:12:27,906 --> 00:12:29,104
we can offer.

300
00:12:29,106 --> 00:12:30,870
Namely, we know
the tax season's coming up.

301
00:12:30,872 --> 00:12:32,704
So by April 1st,
we can have you fully stocked.

302
00:12:32,706 --> 00:12:33,970
One...

303
00:12:33,972 --> 00:12:34,970
Discount prices
on ink cartridges.

304
00:12:34,972 --> 00:12:36,137
Three...

305
00:12:36,139 --> 00:12:37,704
And also any forms
that you're gonna need,

306
00:12:37,706 --> 00:12:40,803
Seven. We can custom make them.

307
00:12:44,939 --> 00:12:48,104
And you just said,
"Hi. Hi. Hi."

308
00:12:50,006 --> 00:12:51,870
You sounded like...

309
00:12:53,439 --> 00:12:54,704
My niece.

310
00:12:54,706 --> 00:12:57,704
And she's six months old.

311
00:12:59,339 --> 00:13:00,870
I appreciate what
you guys are saying,

312
00:13:00,872 --> 00:13:02,070
but it makes more fiscal sense

313
00:13:02,072 --> 00:13:03,404
to go with one of the big guys.

314
00:13:03,406 --> 00:13:04,471
Sure.
That's true.

315
00:13:04,473 --> 00:13:05,538
We can't compete
with their prices.

316
00:13:05,540 --> 00:13:06,571
But let me ask you something.

317
00:13:06,573 --> 00:13:08,638
How important to you
is customer service?

318
00:13:08,640 --> 00:13:10,137
Very.

319
00:13:10,139 --> 00:13:11,170
Please keep holding.

320
00:13:11,172 --> 00:13:12,904
Your call is
very important to us.

321
00:13:12,906 --> 00:13:15,004
That's one
of the "big guys."

322
00:13:15,006 --> 00:13:16,704
Been on hold this whole time.

323
00:13:16,706 --> 00:13:19,237
And this is
Dunder-Mifflin.

324
00:13:20,906 --> 00:13:22,104
Dunder-Mifflin
customer service.

325
00:13:22,106 --> 00:13:23,870
This is Kelly.
Hey, Kelly, it's Jim.

326
00:13:23,872 --> 00:13:26,271
Oh, my God, Jim, how are you?

327
00:13:26,273 --> 00:13:27,870
Here's my card.

328
00:13:27,872 --> 00:13:29,704
It's got my cell number,
my pager number,

329
00:13:29,706 --> 00:13:31,671
my home number,
and my other pager number.

330
00:13:31,673 --> 00:13:33,538
I never take vacations,
I never get sick,

331
00:13:33,540 --> 00:13:35,104
and I don't celebrate
any major holidays.

332
00:13:35,106 --> 00:13:37,104
All right, I get it.

333
00:13:37,106 --> 00:13:38,604
We got a deal.

334
00:13:38,606 --> 00:13:39,737
All right.

335
00:13:39,739 --> 00:13:41,037
Thanks, that was fun.

336
00:13:41,039 --> 00:13:42,137
Yeah.

337
00:13:42,139 --> 00:13:43,638
I really enjoy
spending time with you.

338
00:13:43,640 --> 00:13:44,970
You're a very nice person.

339
00:13:44,972 --> 00:13:46,070
Thank you.

340
00:13:46,072 --> 00:13:48,371
And I'm so glad you're with Jim.

341
00:13:48,373 --> 00:13:52,004
He was hung up on Pam
for such a long time.

342
00:13:52,006 --> 00:13:54,704
I didn't think
he'd ever get over her.

343
00:13:57,572 --> 00:14:00,504
That's nice.

344
00:14:00,506 --> 00:14:04,904
You can pay me back later
for the makeover.

345
00:14:09,938 --> 00:14:11,104
Whew!

346
00:14:11,106 --> 00:14:12,437
Hey, boss.

347
00:14:13,606 --> 00:14:15,337
- Got a minute?
- Yes, Andy.

348
00:14:15,339 --> 00:14:17,671
I forget, why did Dwight say
he was late this morning?

349
00:14:17,673 --> 00:14:18,671
He didn't say.

350
00:14:18,673 --> 00:14:19,904
That's weird.

351
00:14:19,906 --> 00:14:21,638
Because I was just walking
past his desk,

352
00:14:21,640 --> 00:14:24,604
and I saw this, which is
a toll booth receipt

353
00:14:24,606 --> 00:14:26,304
from New York City,

354
00:14:26,306 --> 00:14:30,371
stamped really early
this morning.

355
00:14:30,373 --> 00:14:32,337
Why would Dwight go to New York

356
00:14:32,339 --> 00:14:34,904
without telling anyone?

357
00:14:34,906 --> 00:14:36,304
You think he went to see Jan?

358
00:14:36,306 --> 00:14:38,404
That's not like him.

359
00:14:38,406 --> 00:14:40,504
Is it?

360
00:14:40,506 --> 00:14:42,737
Someone told me a story
about this,

361
00:14:42,739 --> 00:14:47,304
with, like, laundry
and betrayal.

362
00:14:47,306 --> 00:14:49,337
Did you betray Dwight,

363
00:14:49,339 --> 00:14:51,670
and try to steal his job
or something?

364
00:14:51,672 --> 00:14:55,970
No, you are
remembering it wrong.

365
00:14:55,972 --> 00:14:58,337
Dwight betrayed me once before.

366
00:14:58,339 --> 00:15:01,304
So this is his strike two.

367
00:15:01,306 --> 00:15:03,137
You know what they say.

368
00:15:03,139 --> 00:15:05,471
Fool me once, strike one.

369
00:15:05,473 --> 00:15:09,337
But fool me twice...

370
00:15:09,339 --> 00:15:11,904
strike three.

371
00:15:13,971 --> 00:15:16,070
I like Karen.
She's pretty.

372
00:15:16,072 --> 00:15:18,538
Appears intelligent.

373
00:15:18,540 --> 00:15:20,770
Well, I like pretty women

374
00:15:20,772 --> 00:15:24,271
who have the appearance
of intelligence.

375
00:15:24,273 --> 00:15:27,070
My girlfriend is also
beautiful and smart.

376
00:15:27,072 --> 00:15:30,837
She could be a model,
or a college professor

377
00:15:30,839 --> 00:15:34,037
which is intimidating
to a lot of guys.

378
00:15:34,039 --> 00:15:36,170
We should go on a double date.

379
00:15:36,172 --> 00:15:39,304
No, thank you.

380
00:15:39,306 --> 00:15:42,037
Dwight's name is on
the security sign-in sheet,

381
00:15:42,039 --> 00:15:45,137
but I don't know
who he met with.

382
00:15:45,139 --> 00:15:47,204
And where it asks you
to state your business,

383
00:15:47,206 --> 00:15:49,404
he wrote
"Beeswax Not Yours, Inc."

384
00:15:49,406 --> 00:15:50,504
I knew it.

385
00:15:54,472 --> 00:15:57,104
Oooooh, doggy.

386
00:15:57,106 --> 00:15:58,437
Hey,

387
00:15:58,439 --> 00:15:59,937
you wanna grab a coffee?

388
00:15:59,939 --> 00:16:01,937
Sure.

389
00:16:01,939 --> 00:16:03,703
Look at you.

390
00:16:03,705 --> 00:16:06,304
Yeah.

391
00:16:08,738 --> 00:16:11,104
Hey, we nailed the sale.

392
00:16:11,106 --> 00:16:13,237
Where were you this morning?

393
00:16:13,239 --> 00:16:15,603
I overslept.
Damn rooster didn't crow.

394
00:16:15,605 --> 00:16:17,904
Why do you lie, liar?

395
00:16:17,906 --> 00:16:18,937
I am not a liar.

396
00:16:18,939 --> 00:16:20,404
You are lying right now.

397
00:16:20,406 --> 00:16:21,703
Sure seems like he's lying.

398
00:16:21,705 --> 00:16:23,404
Stay out of this, you.

399
00:16:23,406 --> 00:16:25,271
I know that you went
to corporate this morning.

400
00:16:25,273 --> 00:16:28,637
And I know that you lied
about it.

401
00:16:28,639 --> 00:16:30,437
And given our history...

402
00:16:30,439 --> 00:16:33,204
I need you to tell me right now

403
00:16:33,206 --> 00:16:35,837
exactly what you were doing
this morning.

404
00:16:35,839 --> 00:16:39,037
Michael, I cannot tell you
what I was doing there.

405
00:16:39,039 --> 00:16:40,471
But you have to trust me.

406
00:16:40,473 --> 00:16:42,437
I would never do anything
to hurt you

407
00:16:42,439 --> 00:16:43,703
or this company.

408
00:16:43,705 --> 00:16:44,837
Okay, you know what?

409
00:16:44,839 --> 00:16:46,404
I want you to think
about your future

410
00:16:46,406 --> 00:16:47,504
at this company.

411
00:16:47,506 --> 00:16:49,637
I want you to think about it
long and hard.

412
00:16:49,639 --> 00:16:50,637
That's what she said.

413
00:16:50,639 --> 00:16:51,904
Don't you dare.

414
00:16:54,971 --> 00:16:57,437
I want to know what
you were doing this morning

415
00:16:57,439 --> 00:16:59,404
by the end of the day.

416
00:17:04,305 --> 00:17:06,770
It's gonna be okay.

417
00:17:06,772 --> 00:17:09,037
How's it gonna be okay, Dwight?

418
00:17:09,039 --> 00:17:10,970
Everyone will know our business.

419
00:17:10,972 --> 00:17:13,437
That's not the worst thing
in the world.

420
00:17:13,439 --> 00:17:15,670
I'll just stand up
in front of the office,

421
00:17:15,672 --> 00:17:18,503
and reveal our true love.

422
00:17:18,505 --> 00:17:20,271
It won't be that bad.

423
00:17:20,273 --> 00:17:21,970
Look at Kelly and Ryan.

424
00:17:21,972 --> 00:17:23,503
I hate those two people

425
00:17:23,505 --> 00:17:25,337
more than anything
in the entire world.

426
00:17:26,672 --> 00:17:30,104
Well, I don't have
a lot of choices.

427
00:17:30,106 --> 00:17:32,170
So let me ask you a question.

428
00:17:32,172 --> 00:17:33,371
Okay.

429
00:17:33,373 --> 00:17:35,471
Did you ever have a thing
for Pam?

430
00:17:35,473 --> 00:17:37,471
Pam?

431
00:17:37,473 --> 00:17:39,770
Did I ever have a thing for her?

432
00:17:39,772 --> 00:17:41,503
No.

433
00:17:41,505 --> 00:17:44,170
Why, did she say something?

434
00:17:44,172 --> 00:17:47,170
I moved here from Connecticut.

435
00:17:47,172 --> 00:17:48,904
Yeah...

436
00:17:48,906 --> 00:17:53,137
Okay, here's the...

437
00:17:53,139 --> 00:17:56,937
I had... a crush on her

438
00:17:56,939 --> 00:17:59,304
before I left.

439
00:17:59,306 --> 00:18:00,437
And I told her about it,

440
00:18:00,439 --> 00:18:02,637
and she didn't feel
the same way.

441
00:18:02,639 --> 00:18:04,271
So it didn't amount to anything,

442
00:18:04,273 --> 00:18:06,170
and I left.

443
00:18:08,905 --> 00:18:11,637
I'm really glad you're here.

444
00:18:11,639 --> 00:18:13,737
Okay?

445
00:18:13,739 --> 00:18:16,337
Okay.

446
00:18:19,671 --> 00:18:20,770
Ahem.

447
00:18:20,772 --> 00:18:24,937
May I have
your attention, please?

448
00:18:24,939 --> 00:18:28,803
This will only take a moment
of your time.

449
00:18:28,805 --> 00:18:30,570
Although I love this company

450
00:18:30,572 --> 00:18:32,170
more than almost
anything in the world,

451
00:18:32,172 --> 00:18:34,937
I have decided
to step down from my post

452
00:18:34,939 --> 00:18:36,737
and spend more time
with my family.

453
00:18:36,739 --> 00:18:39,037
I do not fear the unknown.

454
00:18:39,039 --> 00:18:41,004
I will meet my new challenges
head on,

455
00:18:41,006 --> 00:18:42,570
and I will succeed.

456
00:18:42,572 --> 00:18:45,337
And I will laugh in the faces
of those who doubt me.

457
00:18:45,339 --> 00:18:48,337
It's been a pleasure
working with some of you,

458
00:18:48,339 --> 00:18:50,570
and I will not forget
those of you soon.

459
00:18:50,572 --> 00:18:53,570
But remember,
while today it is me,

460
00:18:53,572 --> 00:18:57,070
we all shall fall.

461
00:19:01,038 --> 00:19:02,904
In other words, I'm quitting.

462
00:19:02,906 --> 00:19:04,503
So...

463
00:19:23,605 --> 00:19:28,770
I would like to give
the rest of my belongings...

464
00:19:28,772 --> 00:19:30,004
to Michael Scott.

465
00:19:31,171 --> 00:19:33,037
Just take it.

466
00:19:33,039 --> 00:19:34,337
Except this.

467
00:19:34,339 --> 00:19:35,970
Good luck.

468
00:19:35,972 --> 00:19:38,237
And this one.
Oops.

469
00:19:40,338 --> 00:19:42,937
Dwight will be missed.

470
00:19:42,939 --> 00:19:45,770
Not by me... so much.

471
00:19:45,772 --> 00:19:48,570
But he will be missed.

472
00:19:48,572 --> 00:19:52,037
Dwight... from sales...

473
00:19:52,039 --> 00:19:54,737
was one of the most honorable
and efficient employees

474
00:19:54,739 --> 00:19:57,104
this company has ever had.

475
00:19:57,106 --> 00:19:59,703
One of my life goals
was to die right here,

476
00:19:59,705 --> 00:20:01,870
in my desk chair.

477
00:20:01,872 --> 00:20:09,336
And today,
that dream was shattered.

478
00:20:09,338 --> 00:20:10,737
Hey, man.

479
00:20:24,571 --> 00:20:26,304
What happened
on your sales call?

480
00:20:28,971 --> 00:20:32,070
Um, am I happy about
the way things turned out?

481
00:20:32,072 --> 00:20:36,303
Well, happy's such an ugly word.

482
00:20:36,305 --> 00:20:39,770
But I saw what needed
to be done,

483
00:20:39,772 --> 00:20:40,937
and I did it.

484
00:20:40,939 --> 00:20:42,537
And now I'm thrilled.

485
00:20:42,539 --> 00:20:44,503
So it's pretty...

486
00:20:44,505 --> 00:20:46,770
Hello?

487
00:20:46,772 --> 00:20:48,503
Pretty good.

488
00:20:49,594 --> 00:20:59,584
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