1
00:00:00,634 --> 00:00:01,703
Hey.

2
00:00:05,978 --> 00:00:08,082
Oh, what's this?

3
00:00:08,084 --> 00:00:09,651
That is a demerit.

4
00:00:09,653 --> 00:00:12,023
"Jim Halpert, tardiness."

5
00:00:12,025 --> 00:00:13,727
Ugh.

6
00:00:13,729 --> 00:00:15,563
- I love it already.
- You've gotta learn, Jim.

7
00:00:15,565 --> 00:00:16,665
You are second in command,

8
00:00:16,667 --> 00:00:18,235
but that does not put you
above the law.

9
00:00:18,237 --> 00:00:19,504
Oh, I understand.

10
00:00:19,506 --> 00:00:21,608
And I also have
lots of questions, like,

11
00:00:21,610 --> 00:00:23,412
what does a demerit mean?

12
00:00:23,414 --> 00:00:25,049
Let's put it this way.

13
00:00:25,051 --> 00:00:27,186
You do not want to receive
three of those.

14
00:00:27,188 --> 00:00:28,355
Lay it on me.

15
00:00:28,357 --> 00:00:30,092
Three demerits
and you'll receive a citation.

16
00:00:30,094 --> 00:00:31,796
Now that sounds serious.

17
00:00:31,798 --> 00:00:32,865
Oh, it is serious.

18
00:00:32,867 --> 00:00:34,200
Five citations

19
00:00:34,202 --> 00:00:35,402
and you're looking
at a violation.

20
00:00:35,404 --> 00:00:36,773
Four of those

21
00:00:36,775 --> 00:00:38,308
and you'll receive
a verbal warning.

22
00:00:38,310 --> 00:00:40,412
Keep it up, and you're looking
at a written warning.

23
00:00:40,414 --> 00:00:42,116
Two of those,

24
00:00:42,118 --> 00:00:43,987
that'll land you
in a world of hurt...

25
00:00:43,989 --> 00:00:46,291
in the form
of a disciplinary review

26
00:00:46,293 --> 00:00:47,560
written up by me

27
00:00:47,562 --> 00:00:49,799
and placed on the desk
of my immediate superior.

28
00:00:49,801 --> 00:00:51,101
Which would be me.

29
00:00:51,103 --> 00:00:53,172
That is correct.

30
00:00:53,174 --> 00:00:55,209
Okay, I want a copy on my desk

31
00:00:55,211 --> 00:00:57,613
by the end of the day
or you will receive

32
00:00:57,615 --> 00:00:59,117
a full disadulation.

33
00:00:59,119 --> 00:01:01,188
What's a dis...

34
00:01:01,190 --> 00:01:02,323
what's that?

35
00:01:04,261 --> 00:01:05,764
Oh, you don't want to know.

36
00:01:06,767 --> 00:01:12,847
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.

37
00:01:47,715 --> 00:01:48,883
Hey, Phyllis.

38
00:01:48,885 --> 00:01:50,085
You all right?

39
00:01:50,087 --> 00:01:53,325
I think I just got flashed.

40
00:01:53,327 --> 00:01:54,694
What?

41
00:01:54,696 --> 00:01:55,830
Really?

42
00:01:55,832 --> 00:01:57,834
In the parking lot.

43
00:01:57,836 --> 00:02:00,172
Oh, my God.

44
00:02:00,174 --> 00:02:02,610
Move!

45
00:02:02,612 --> 00:02:04,280
Okay, I'll call the real police.

46
00:02:04,282 --> 00:02:05,416
What happened?

47
00:02:05,418 --> 00:02:06,786
What can I do to help?

48
00:02:09,358 --> 00:02:11,695
I'll check the web.

49
00:02:11,697 --> 00:02:13,532
Thank you.

50
00:02:13,534 --> 00:02:15,937
The police are on it.

51
00:02:15,939 --> 00:02:17,841
They say they've already had
three calls.

52
00:02:19,445 --> 00:02:21,047
Can you tell us what happened?

53
00:02:21,049 --> 00:02:22,583
Um...

54
00:02:22,585 --> 00:02:24,120
I was walking to the building

55
00:02:24,122 --> 00:02:26,458
and this man
asked me for directions.

56
00:02:26,460 --> 00:02:29,297
And he was holding a map.

57
00:02:29,299 --> 00:02:31,601
And when I walked over,

58
00:02:31,603 --> 00:02:34,607
he had it out...

59
00:02:34,609 --> 00:02:36,444
on the map.

60
00:02:36,446 --> 00:02:38,750
Phyllis.
You're a married woman.

61
00:02:38,752 --> 00:02:39,952
The guy was just

62
00:02:39,954 --> 00:02:41,154
hanging brain.

63
00:02:41,156 --> 00:02:42,590
I mean, what's all the fuss?

64
00:02:42,592 --> 00:02:45,864
If that's flashing,
then lock me up.

65
00:02:45,866 --> 00:02:47,433
It's just, like, so creepy.

66
00:02:49,372 --> 00:02:50,439
What's happening?

67
00:02:50,441 --> 00:02:52,510
Oh, some guy exposed himself

68
00:02:52,512 --> 00:02:54,013
to Phyllis in the parking lot.

69
00:02:54,015 --> 00:02:55,750
Really?

70
00:02:55,752 --> 00:02:56,852
Is she okay?

71
00:02:56,854 --> 00:02:58,388
Yeah, Bob Vance
took her for a walk

72
00:02:58,390 --> 00:02:59,590
to calm down.

73
00:02:59,592 --> 00:03:01,561
Okay.

74
00:03:04,002 --> 00:03:05,102
Phyllis, you say?

75
00:03:07,208 --> 00:03:08,209
Hmm.

76
00:03:09,713 --> 00:03:11,114
What is so funny?

77
00:03:11,116 --> 00:03:14,120
Um... I mean,
did he even see Pam?

78
00:03:14,122 --> 00:03:15,522
Or, uh...

79
00:03:15,524 --> 00:03:16,892
Karen from behind?

80
00:03:16,894 --> 00:03:18,996
I'm guessing not.

81
00:03:22,773 --> 00:03:24,340
I'm sorry.

82
00:03:28,283 --> 00:03:30,252
It's pretty funny
when you think about it.

83
00:03:30,254 --> 00:03:31,822
Mm... not really, no.

84
00:03:31,824 --> 00:03:33,458
It's disgusting and demeaning.

85
00:03:33,460 --> 00:03:34,795
Oh, okay.

86
00:03:34,797 --> 00:03:37,566
Masters of comedy.
A guy dropped his pants.

87
00:03:37,568 --> 00:03:39,403
Have you ever been
to the circus?

88
00:03:40,607 --> 00:03:42,209
Okay.

89
00:03:47,087 --> 00:03:49,190
He's back!

90
00:03:51,696 --> 00:03:53,165
Okay. Hmm.

91
00:03:54,904 --> 00:03:56,037
Waagh!

92
00:03:56,039 --> 00:03:57,606
Hey, what's going on?

93
00:03:57,608 --> 00:03:59,110
There's a police car in the...

94
00:03:59,112 --> 00:04:00,179
What? Oh.

95
00:04:02,218 --> 00:04:04,153
What's going on?

96
00:04:04,155 --> 00:04:05,723
Oh, Phyllis got flashed.

97
00:04:05,725 --> 00:04:06,992
It's, uh...

98
00:04:08,263 --> 00:04:10,532
I don't think
laughing about it's

99
00:04:10,534 --> 00:04:11,936
appropriate response.

100
00:04:11,938 --> 00:04:13,572
Oh, come on...
we are laughing at Phyllis,

101
00:04:13,574 --> 00:04:15,777
but she's not even here,
so no harm, no foul.

102
00:04:15,779 --> 00:04:17,379
I don't think the women
in this office...

103
00:04:17,381 --> 00:04:19,217
Incidentally, where were you
during all of this?

104
00:04:19,219 --> 00:04:20,352
Maybe you're the flasher.

105
00:04:20,354 --> 00:04:22,223
I was at
a parent-teacher conference.

106
00:04:22,225 --> 00:04:23,491
Uh-huh.

107
00:04:23,493 --> 00:04:25,229
Prove it.
Let's see your penis.

108
00:04:29,405 --> 00:04:31,007
I...

109
00:04:31,009 --> 00:04:32,376
you know,

110
00:04:32,378 --> 00:04:35,215
as that was coming
out of my mouth,

111
00:04:35,217 --> 00:04:37,787
I knew that it was wrong.

112
00:04:40,460 --> 00:04:42,797
In all the excitement,

113
00:04:42,799 --> 00:04:46,170
I forgot that my primary goal

114
00:04:46,172 --> 00:04:49,577
is to keep people safe.

115
00:04:49,579 --> 00:04:52,516
Women can't have fun

116
00:04:52,518 --> 00:04:54,186
if they don't feel safe.

117
00:04:54,188 --> 00:04:57,626
For example,
Jan and I have a safe word

118
00:04:57,628 --> 00:04:59,998
in case things go too far.

119
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,601
Foliage.

120
00:05:01,603 --> 00:05:04,573
And if one of us says that word,

121
00:05:04,575 --> 00:05:06,577
the other one has to stop.

122
00:05:09,651 --> 00:05:12,589
Although last time...

123
00:05:12,591 --> 00:05:15,429
she pretended
she didn't hear me.

124
00:05:15,431 --> 00:05:17,834
Michael, come over
after work tonight, okay?

125
00:05:17,836 --> 00:05:19,136
I miss your body.

126
00:05:19,138 --> 00:05:21,174
I don't know.

127
00:05:21,176 --> 00:05:22,576
I feel...

128
00:05:22,578 --> 00:05:24,146
I drive a lot.

129
00:05:24,148 --> 00:05:26,517
I'm spending a fortune
on gas and tolls...

130
00:05:26,519 --> 00:05:27,519
I'll give you $200.

131
00:05:27,521 --> 00:05:28,856
And if I get up before you,

132
00:05:28,858 --> 00:05:30,359
I'll leave it on the dresser.

133
00:05:30,361 --> 00:05:32,463
Um, that...
I don't know.

134
00:05:32,465 --> 00:05:33,698
That makes me
kind of uncomfortable.

135
00:05:33,701 --> 00:05:35,068
$300?

136
00:05:35,070 --> 00:05:37,373
I... uh, well,
I don't know.

137
00:05:37,375 --> 00:05:38,843
Whatever.

138
00:05:38,845 --> 00:05:40,345
Just let my assistant know
if you're coming over

139
00:05:40,347 --> 00:05:41,647
so he can get more vodka, okay?

140
00:05:41,649 --> 00:05:42,917
Hunter, are you on?

141
00:05:42,919 --> 00:05:44,687
You got it, Jan.

142
00:05:47,293 --> 00:05:49,998
Employees of this office
are very small and delicate.

143
00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:53,037
Deserve protection
from local pervs.

144
00:05:53,039 --> 00:05:55,108
Better 1,000 innocent men
are locked up

145
00:05:55,110 --> 00:05:57,312
than one guilty man roam free.

146
00:05:58,483 --> 00:06:00,018
I am sick over this thing.

147
00:06:00,020 --> 00:06:02,156
Those people out there
are clearly afraid.

148
00:06:02,158 --> 00:06:03,691
And that can't happen.

149
00:06:03,693 --> 00:06:05,295
Not in my house.
Agreed.

150
00:06:05,297 --> 00:06:07,132
Let me show you
what I've been working on.

151
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:08,168
Okay.

152
00:06:08,170 --> 00:06:10,305
There are several penises there

153
00:06:10,307 --> 00:06:11,641
I'd love Phyllis
to run her eyes over.

154
00:06:11,643 --> 00:06:13,278
See if we can catch
this pervert.

155
00:06:13,280 --> 00:06:15,148
This is the last thing

156
00:06:15,150 --> 00:06:17,152
that Phyllis needs
to see right now, Dwight.

157
00:06:17,154 --> 00:06:18,221
Look at that one.

158
00:06:20,693 --> 00:06:22,229
Dwight, are those your pants?

159
00:06:22,231 --> 00:06:24,233
That's a Polaroid.

160
00:06:26,238 --> 00:06:28,074
Attention, everybody.

161
00:06:28,076 --> 00:06:29,744
Dwight has something
he would like to say.

162
00:06:29,746 --> 00:06:32,750
Due to a recent incident
involving Phyllis,

163
00:06:32,752 --> 00:06:34,220
a man,

164
00:06:34,222 --> 00:06:36,090
a map, and his penis...

165
00:06:36,092 --> 00:06:37,493
I think you know
what I'm referring to...

166
00:06:37,495 --> 00:06:41,234
Michael has authorized me
to form

167
00:06:41,236 --> 00:06:43,371
an emergency
anti-flashing task force.

168
00:06:43,373 --> 00:06:44,941
Question.

169
00:06:44,943 --> 00:06:47,747
Won't that interfere
with your other task forces?

170
00:06:47,749 --> 00:06:50,585
no, because this
is being given priority one.

171
00:06:50,587 --> 00:06:52,256
This is a petition

172
00:06:52,258 --> 00:06:54,794
for the business park to upgrade
their security cameras

173
00:06:54,796 --> 00:06:57,132
as well as install
two floodlights

174
00:06:57,134 --> 00:06:58,535
in the parking lot.

175
00:06:58,537 --> 00:07:00,372
And I know...
I know what you're thinking.

176
00:07:00,374 --> 00:07:02,676
Won't that just shed more light

177
00:07:02,678 --> 00:07:03,879
on the penises?

178
00:07:03,881 --> 00:07:06,484
But that is a risk
we have to take.

179
00:07:06,486 --> 00:07:08,087
Pam.
You can draw, kind of.

180
00:07:08,089 --> 00:07:09,456
Why don't you work with Phallus

181
00:07:09,458 --> 00:07:10,492
on drawing a picture

182
00:07:10,494 --> 00:07:11,594
of the exposer

183
00:07:11,596 --> 00:07:12,797
that I can post
around the community?

184
00:07:12,799 --> 00:07:13,966
Phallus?

185
00:07:13,968 --> 00:07:15,101
Phyllis, sorry.

186
00:07:15,103 --> 00:07:16,805
I've got penises on the brain.

187
00:07:16,807 --> 00:07:18,575
Back to work, everybody.

188
00:07:25,891 --> 00:07:27,392
I don't often miss Roy.

189
00:07:27,394 --> 00:07:29,396
But I can tell you one thing.

190
00:07:29,398 --> 00:07:32,336
I wish someone had flashed me
when I was with Roy.

191
00:07:32,338 --> 00:07:34,841
Because that would have been
the ass-kicking of the year.

192
00:07:36,112 --> 00:07:39,450
Especially if it had been Jim.

193
00:07:39,452 --> 00:07:42,055
He would not have wanted me
to have seen Jim's...

194
00:07:43,994 --> 00:07:45,161
Whoo, I am...

195
00:07:45,163 --> 00:07:47,032
I am saying a lot of things.

196
00:07:50,172 --> 00:07:51,942
I didn't really get a good look.

197
00:07:51,944 --> 00:07:53,378
That's okay.

198
00:07:53,380 --> 00:07:54,981
I don't feel
like answering phones.

199
00:07:54,983 --> 00:07:57,319
Hey, did you guys see this memo
that Dwight sent out?

200
00:07:57,321 --> 00:08:00,158
"Women will be sent home

201
00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:02,897
"if they wear makeup or heels
exceeding 1/4 inch.

202
00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:05,235
"Females are not allowed
to speak to strangers

203
00:08:05,237 --> 00:08:07,172
"unless given written
authorization

204
00:08:07,174 --> 00:08:08,608
by Dwight Schrute."

205
00:08:08,610 --> 00:08:10,011
- This is ridiculous.
- Attention.

206
00:08:10,013 --> 00:08:12,582
I am removing all bananas
from the kitchen.

207
00:08:13,987 --> 00:08:16,390
Dwight, this memo
that you distributed

208
00:08:16,392 --> 00:08:18,528
is insulting.

209
00:08:18,530 --> 00:08:20,198
Desperate times
call for desperate measures.

210
00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:21,702
"Sleeves down to the wrists,

211
00:08:21,704 --> 00:08:24,006
buttoned-up collars,
and muted colors."

212
00:08:24,008 --> 00:08:25,475
Nobody dresses like that.

213
00:08:25,477 --> 00:08:27,714
Okay, you know something,
Dwight?

214
00:08:27,716 --> 00:08:29,116
We are not the terrorists.

215
00:08:29,118 --> 00:08:31,020
Why don't you just
take these women,

216
00:08:31,022 --> 00:08:33,658
put 'em in a burlap sack,
and hit 'em with a stick?

217
00:08:33,660 --> 00:08:35,061
Because that's
what you're doing.

218
00:08:35,063 --> 00:08:36,798
I celebrate these women.

219
00:08:36,800 --> 00:08:40,371
They deserve the right
to dress as they please.

220
00:08:40,373 --> 00:08:41,875
If Pam wants
to show more cleavage,

221
00:08:41,877 --> 00:08:43,111
she should be able to.

222
00:08:43,113 --> 00:08:44,646
I encourage that.

223
00:08:44,648 --> 00:08:45,950
Look, it's really simple.

224
00:08:45,952 --> 00:08:48,654
We just want you guys
to treat us with respect.

225
00:08:48,656 --> 00:08:50,391
See? That's what
we're talking about.

226
00:08:50,393 --> 00:08:51,627
Did you hear that, Dwight?

227
00:08:51,629 --> 00:08:52,897
Yes.

228
00:08:52,899 --> 00:08:54,366
Did you hear that, Michael?

229
00:08:54,368 --> 00:08:57,840
No, Dwight. Respect.
R-E-S-P... svee... T.

230
00:08:57,842 --> 00:09:00,278
Find out what it means to me.

231
00:09:00,280 --> 00:09:03,317
All right, you know what?
That's it.

232
00:09:03,319 --> 00:09:04,788
Conference room, five minutes.

233
00:09:04,790 --> 00:09:06,056
Women's appreciation.

234
00:09:06,058 --> 00:09:08,060
Wait a second, how are you
qualified for that?

235
00:09:08,062 --> 00:09:10,131
Oh, I don't know, James.

236
00:09:10,133 --> 00:09:11,868
Did I come from a woman?

237
00:09:11,870 --> 00:09:13,337
Have I slept with a woman?

238
00:09:13,339 --> 00:09:15,375
- More than one?
- Mm, less than three.

239
00:09:15,377 --> 00:09:17,512
- That is not current.
- You know what?

240
00:09:17,514 --> 00:09:19,249
Why doesn't Oscar
run the meeting?

241
00:09:19,251 --> 00:09:20,552
He's a homosexual.

242
00:09:20,554 --> 00:09:22,556
Why don't you run the meeting?
You play with dolls.

243
00:09:22,558 --> 00:09:23,759
Those are collectable
action figures

244
00:09:23,761 --> 00:09:25,528
and they're worth more
than your car.

245
00:09:25,530 --> 00:09:27,199
You know what?
I am the expert.

246
00:09:27,201 --> 00:09:28,634
I will conduct it.

247
00:09:28,636 --> 00:09:30,205
I know the crap out of women.

248
00:09:30,207 --> 00:09:31,741
I, um...

249
00:09:31,743 --> 00:09:34,646
would like to apologize
for all of the men

250
00:09:34,648 --> 00:09:37,385
who thought this
was a laughing matter.

251
00:09:37,387 --> 00:09:38,654
Are we still discussing this?

252
00:09:38,656 --> 00:09:41,160
I say again,
what is the big deal?

253
00:09:41,162 --> 00:09:43,231
Nobody likes to be flashed.

254
00:09:43,233 --> 00:09:46,070
When Meredith flashed me
at that Christmas party,

255
00:09:46,072 --> 00:09:47,205
I nearly vomited.

256
00:09:47,207 --> 00:09:48,742
I don't remember doing that.

257
00:09:48,744 --> 00:09:50,278
What a surprise.

258
00:09:50,280 --> 00:09:51,647
Okay, no catfights.
Please. Let's...

259
00:09:51,649 --> 00:09:53,886
my point is...

260
00:09:53,888 --> 00:09:57,292
my point is...

261
00:09:57,294 --> 00:09:58,661
a penis,

262
00:09:58,663 --> 00:10:00,498
when seen

263
00:10:00,500 --> 00:10:01,968
in the right context,

264
00:10:01,970 --> 00:10:05,508
is the most wonderful sight
for a woman.

265
00:10:05,510 --> 00:10:06,577
But in the wrong context,

266
00:10:06,579 --> 00:10:07,780
it is like a monster movie.

267
00:10:07,782 --> 00:10:09,751
Alien.
Blagh!

268
00:10:09,753 --> 00:10:11,320
Whether... shut it.
Shut. Up.

269
00:10:11,322 --> 00:10:13,024
Okay, so what I want

270
00:10:13,026 --> 00:10:16,630
to engage us in today
is a hardcore discussion

271
00:10:16,632 --> 00:10:20,405
about women's problems
and issues

272
00:10:20,407 --> 00:10:22,008
and situations.

273
00:10:22,010 --> 00:10:23,812
Magazines and TV shows

274
00:10:23,814 --> 00:10:26,583
and movies portray women

275
00:10:26,585 --> 00:10:29,791
as skinny, tall goddesses.

276
00:10:29,793 --> 00:10:32,162
Well, look around.

277
00:10:32,164 --> 00:10:34,032
Are women like that?

278
00:10:34,034 --> 00:10:35,769
No.

279
00:10:35,771 --> 00:10:38,809
No, they are not.

280
00:10:38,811 --> 00:10:40,211
Even the hot ones

281
00:10:40,213 --> 00:10:43,217
aren't really that skinny.

282
00:10:43,219 --> 00:10:44,954
So what does that say?

283
00:10:44,956 --> 00:10:47,125
That says that you women

284
00:10:47,127 --> 00:10:49,129
are up against it.

285
00:10:49,131 --> 00:10:50,264
And it is criminal.

286
00:10:50,266 --> 00:10:52,002
Society doesn't care.

287
00:10:52,004 --> 00:10:53,604
Society sucks.

288
00:10:53,606 --> 00:10:56,343
I don't even consider myself
a part of society.

289
00:10:56,345 --> 00:10:57,679
FYI.

290
00:10:57,681 --> 00:11:01,086
Because I am so angry
over all of this.

291
00:11:01,088 --> 00:11:02,757
If it were up to me,

292
00:11:02,759 --> 00:11:06,263
you ladies
would be the fashion models.

293
00:11:06,265 --> 00:11:07,632
Yes, Andy.

294
00:11:07,634 --> 00:11:09,603
Then the fashion models
could come here

295
00:11:09,605 --> 00:11:10,706
and work with me.

296
00:11:10,708 --> 00:11:11,808
What you're saying

297
00:11:11,810 --> 00:11:13,210
is extremely misogynistic.

298
00:11:13,212 --> 00:11:15,916
Yes.
Thank you.

299
00:11:15,918 --> 00:11:17,753
That was not necessary,

300
00:11:17,755 --> 00:11:19,322
but I appreciated it.

301
00:11:19,324 --> 00:11:20,491
And it proves my point.

302
00:11:20,493 --> 00:11:22,162
Women can do anything.

303
00:11:22,164 --> 00:11:24,466
I'm saying
that you're being sexist.

304
00:11:24,468 --> 00:11:26,938
No, I'm being misogynistic.

305
00:11:26,940 --> 00:11:29,509
That is insane.
I am not being sexist.

306
00:11:29,511 --> 00:11:30,846
That...
it's the same thing.

307
00:11:30,848 --> 00:11:32,015
Michael.
Yes.

308
00:11:32,017 --> 00:11:33,250
When I got my hair cut short,

309
00:11:33,252 --> 00:11:35,188
you asked me if I was a lesbian.

310
00:11:35,190 --> 00:11:36,758
Because wha...

311
00:11:36,760 --> 00:11:38,461
that was one
possible explanation

312
00:11:38,463 --> 00:11:41,033
as to why you got that haircut.

313
00:11:41,035 --> 00:11:42,837
And when we get mad,
you always ask us

314
00:11:42,839 --> 00:11:44,573
if we're on our periods.

315
00:11:44,575 --> 00:11:46,610
I have to know
whether you're serious or not.

316
00:11:46,612 --> 00:11:49,249
I wish I could menstruate.

317
00:11:49,251 --> 00:11:51,053
If I could menstruate,
I wouldn't have to deal

318
00:11:51,055 --> 00:11:52,655
with idiotic calendars anymore.

319
00:11:52,657 --> 00:11:55,729
I'd just be able to count down
from my previous cycle.

320
00:11:55,731 --> 00:11:58,601
Plus, I'd be more in tune
with the moon and the tides.

321
00:11:58,603 --> 00:12:00,238
Can we just get back to work?

322
00:12:00,240 --> 00:12:01,473
Ye... okay, yes.

323
00:12:01,475 --> 00:12:03,110
- This is not work talk.
- You're right.

324
00:12:03,112 --> 00:12:04,747
You're right, you're right.
And you know why?

325
00:12:04,749 --> 00:12:06,016
It's because

326
00:12:06,018 --> 00:12:07,118
of where we are.

327
00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:09,322
This is a masculine environment.

328
00:12:09,324 --> 00:12:12,595
We need to find a place
where you feel comfortable.

329
00:12:12,597 --> 00:12:15,601
You know where we're gonna go?

330
00:12:15,603 --> 00:12:16,804
The Steamtown Mall.

331
00:12:18,609 --> 00:12:20,244
Frankly, it's kind of insulting.

332
00:12:20,246 --> 00:12:23,250
But I have a bunch of stuff
I need to return in my car.

333
00:12:23,252 --> 00:12:26,223
So... I could do that.

334
00:12:26,225 --> 00:12:28,661
Malls are just awful
and humiliating.

335
00:12:28,663 --> 00:12:30,631
They're just store after store

336
00:12:30,633 --> 00:12:32,803
of these horrible salespeople
making a big fuss

337
00:12:32,805 --> 00:12:35,208
out of an adult shopping
in a junior's section.

338
00:12:35,210 --> 00:12:40,184
There are petite adults
who are sort of... smaller

339
00:12:40,186 --> 00:12:41,754
who need to wear...

340
00:12:41,756 --> 00:12:44,226
maybe a kids' size 10.

341
00:12:44,228 --> 00:12:46,363
Okay, let's go,

342
00:12:46,365 --> 00:12:47,900
ladies of Dunder-Mifflin.

343
00:12:47,902 --> 00:12:50,471
Hey, we should have
a calendar printed up.

344
00:12:50,473 --> 00:12:52,776
Pam, put that
in my good idea folder.

345
00:12:52,778 --> 00:12:54,512
Let's go!

346
00:12:54,514 --> 00:12:56,283
Have you finished
with the sketch?

347
00:12:56,285 --> 00:12:58,254
Yeah.

348
00:12:58,256 --> 00:12:59,890
Hmm, doesn't seem like the type.

349
00:12:59,892 --> 00:13:01,526
Uh, Phyllis got a good look.

350
00:13:01,528 --> 00:13:02,997
Hmm.

351
00:13:06,471 --> 00:13:09,744
I plan on plastering
this pervert's face everywhere.

352
00:13:09,746 --> 00:13:12,816
You can run,
but you cannot hide.

353
00:13:14,788 --> 00:13:15,856
Oh.

354
00:13:15,858 --> 00:13:17,325
Meredith, slow down!

355
00:13:17,327 --> 00:13:19,462
We're not gonna get there
any faster if we're dead.

356
00:13:19,464 --> 00:13:21,400
Thanks.
I know how to drive.

357
00:13:26,879 --> 00:13:27,913
Oh, yeah.

358
00:13:27,915 --> 00:13:29,482
You really shouldn't litter.

359
00:13:29,484 --> 00:13:32,588
My car, my rules.

360
00:13:36,497 --> 00:13:38,902
Hey, Jim.

361
00:13:38,904 --> 00:13:41,006
You wanna go
in the women's bathroom?

362
00:13:41,008 --> 00:13:42,241
No.

363
00:13:42,243 --> 00:13:43,410
Thank you, though.

364
00:13:43,412 --> 00:13:45,047
You aren't curious?

365
00:13:45,049 --> 00:13:46,216
Not really.

366
00:13:46,218 --> 00:13:47,585
I've seen a bathroom before.

367
00:13:47,587 --> 00:13:48,988
Yeah, but...

368
00:13:48,990 --> 00:13:51,560
it's every guy's fantasy.

369
00:13:51,562 --> 00:13:53,965
I think you mean
a girl's locker room.

370
00:13:53,967 --> 00:13:56,403
And in the fantasy,
there's usually girls in it.

371
00:13:56,405 --> 00:13:58,574
Yeah.

372
00:13:58,576 --> 00:14:00,311
I'm going in.

373
00:14:00,313 --> 00:14:02,081
Go crazy.

374
00:14:06,491 --> 00:14:09,596
Oh... my... God.

375
00:14:09,598 --> 00:14:11,666
I really appreciate
your letting me work

376
00:14:11,668 --> 00:14:12,770
alongside you so closely today.

377
00:14:12,772 --> 00:14:14,272
Of course you do, moon face.

378
00:14:14,274 --> 00:14:15,709
That's because
you're a preppy freak,

379
00:14:15,711 --> 00:14:17,612
you're the office pariah,
and nobody likes you.

380
00:14:17,614 --> 00:14:20,317
So start hanging these
all around the building.

381
00:14:25,930 --> 00:14:27,733
This guy looks like
a real deviant.

382
00:14:27,735 --> 00:14:29,770
No, duh.
That's why we gotta catch him.

383
00:14:29,772 --> 00:14:30,806
Start hanging those.

384
00:14:30,808 --> 00:14:32,208
Aye, aye, Cap'n.

385
00:14:32,210 --> 00:14:34,479
More like,
"Aye, aye, General."

386
00:14:34,481 --> 00:14:37,685
I don't think
she's gonna make it.

387
00:14:37,687 --> 00:14:39,322
Don't think
she's gonna make it...

388
00:14:43,065 --> 00:14:44,265
It's a little too tight.

389
00:14:44,267 --> 00:14:46,570
I'm gonna find another spot.

390
00:14:46,572 --> 00:14:49,075
Many women
are competent drivers.

391
00:15:00,666 --> 00:15:02,903
This is what we know.

392
00:15:06,277 --> 00:15:07,913
Well, I stand corrected.

393
00:15:07,915 --> 00:15:09,082
This is pretty cool.

394
00:15:09,084 --> 00:15:10,417
Yes.

395
00:15:10,419 --> 00:15:11,686
Hey, uh...

396
00:15:11,688 --> 00:15:13,825
where'd you decide
to take Karen tonight?

397
00:15:13,827 --> 00:15:15,094
Anna Maria's.

398
00:15:15,096 --> 00:15:16,196
What's the occasion?

399
00:15:16,198 --> 00:15:17,298
Six-month anniversary.

400
00:15:19,804 --> 00:15:21,606
What?

401
00:15:21,608 --> 00:15:23,443
Nothing... I think, uh,
we all kinda thought

402
00:15:23,445 --> 00:15:24,880
you guys were just,
like, hooking up.

403
00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:28,387
No, we've been dating
for six months.

404
00:15:28,389 --> 00:15:33,230
Uh, she might mention
an email that I wrote

405
00:15:33,232 --> 00:15:34,232
a while back, um...

406
00:15:34,234 --> 00:15:35,334
Oh, right.

407
00:15:35,336 --> 00:15:36,871
I remember that one.
She read it to me.

408
00:15:36,873 --> 00:15:38,841
She said...

409
00:15:38,843 --> 00:15:40,912
she's not really ready
to date somebody in the office,

410
00:15:40,914 --> 00:15:42,749
but she really likes you
as a friend.

411
00:15:42,751 --> 00:15:44,787
I figured.

412
00:15:44,789 --> 00:15:45,956
It's cool.

413
00:15:45,958 --> 00:15:47,124
I don't...
I wouldn't want to be

414
00:15:47,126 --> 00:15:48,962
in an office relationship
anyway.

415
00:15:51,033 --> 00:15:53,236
All right.

416
00:15:53,238 --> 00:15:55,374
Hope nobody's on a diet.

417
00:15:55,376 --> 00:15:57,178
- Thanks, Michael.
- You're welcome.

418
00:15:57,180 --> 00:15:59,048
You're welcome, you're welcome.

419
00:15:59,050 --> 00:16:02,188
Okay.

420
00:16:02,190 --> 00:16:03,825
So, let's dish.

421
00:16:03,827 --> 00:16:05,862
What do you want to dish about?

422
00:16:05,864 --> 00:16:08,233
Anything you guys want.
This is your time.

423
00:16:21,627 --> 00:16:24,666
Mm.
What is a Pap smear?

424
00:16:24,668 --> 00:16:26,403
Or is it "shmear?"

425
00:16:26,405 --> 00:16:27,839
Like the cream cheese.

426
00:16:27,841 --> 00:16:29,743
Okay.
New topic.

427
00:16:29,745 --> 00:16:32,014
Kelly, how are things with Ryan?

428
00:16:32,016 --> 00:16:33,216
Awesome.

429
00:16:33,218 --> 00:16:34,953
Um, awful, I mean.

430
00:16:34,955 --> 00:16:37,258
But, uh, sometimes awesome.

431
00:16:37,260 --> 00:16:39,228
What, um...

432
00:16:39,230 --> 00:16:40,999
what do you think
of role-play?

433
00:16:41,001 --> 00:16:42,301
Oh, it can be fun.

434
00:16:42,303 --> 00:16:43,537
Yeah?

435
00:16:43,539 --> 00:16:47,211
Well, Jan has
this schoolgirl fantasy.

436
00:16:47,213 --> 00:16:48,513
It's a pretty common one.

437
00:16:48,515 --> 00:16:49,750
I just...

438
00:16:49,752 --> 00:16:51,921
I feel uncomfortable
wearing the dress.

439
00:16:51,923 --> 00:16:53,023
Okay.

440
00:16:53,025 --> 00:16:55,929
I'm gonna be at the doll store.

441
00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:58,400
Sometimes, the clothes
at GapKids are just too flashy.

442
00:16:58,402 --> 00:17:00,739
So I'm forced to go
to the American Girl store

443
00:17:00,741 --> 00:17:04,713
and order clothes
for large colonial dolls.

444
00:17:04,715 --> 00:17:06,416
Michael,
you shouldn't do anything

445
00:17:06,418 --> 00:17:07,618
that you're uncomfortable with.

446
00:17:07,620 --> 00:17:09,723
Jan says anything
that doesn't scare us

447
00:17:09,725 --> 00:17:11,426
is not worth doing.

448
00:17:11,428 --> 00:17:12,661
I don't know.

449
00:17:12,663 --> 00:17:13,765
Maybe we're different people.

450
00:17:13,767 --> 00:17:14,867
I like cuddling

451
00:17:14,869 --> 00:17:16,236
and spooning

452
00:17:16,238 --> 00:17:17,739
and she likes
videotaping us during sex.

453
00:17:17,741 --> 00:17:18,775
Oh, my God.

454
00:17:19,945 --> 00:17:21,714
And then watching it back
right afterward

455
00:17:21,716 --> 00:17:23,450
to improve my form.

456
00:17:23,452 --> 00:17:25,087
That is not healthy behavior.

457
00:17:25,089 --> 00:17:26,289
No, it's not that bad.

458
00:17:26,291 --> 00:17:29,162
The worst part
is that she shows it

459
00:17:29,164 --> 00:17:31,801
to her therapist
and they discuss it.

460
00:17:31,803 --> 00:17:33,136
Michael, you need
to get out of this.

461
00:17:33,138 --> 00:17:34,706
No, she's...

462
00:17:34,708 --> 00:17:36,242
she's fooling around.

463
00:17:36,244 --> 00:17:38,180
It's a woman thing.

464
00:17:38,182 --> 00:17:40,450
No, normal women
don't do stuff like that.

465
00:17:40,452 --> 00:17:42,989
This is bad.

466
00:17:51,340 --> 00:17:52,474
No...

467
00:17:52,476 --> 00:17:53,878
No, it's all right.
I'm okay.

468
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:54,947
I'm okay.

469
00:17:57,053 --> 00:17:59,622
You guys...

470
00:17:59,624 --> 00:18:02,595
what am I gonna do about Jan?

471
00:18:05,068 --> 00:18:07,304
Done.

472
00:18:07,306 --> 00:18:08,741
Read the pros first.

473
00:18:08,743 --> 00:18:11,546
Okay.
Jan is smart.

474
00:18:11,548 --> 00:18:13,583
Uh, successful.

475
00:18:13,585 --> 00:18:16,489
Good clothes.
Hot.

476
00:18:16,491 --> 00:18:18,660
Perfect skin.

477
00:18:18,662 --> 00:18:19,963
Nice butt.

478
00:18:19,965 --> 00:18:21,332
She does have very nice clothes.

479
00:18:21,334 --> 00:18:24,038
Okay, okay.
Um, cons.

480
00:18:24,040 --> 00:18:25,374
Cons.

481
00:18:25,376 --> 00:18:27,678
Wears too much makeup.

482
00:18:27,680 --> 00:18:30,217
not anything
to write home about.

483
00:18:30,219 --> 00:18:31,954
Insecure about body.

484
00:18:31,956 --> 00:18:33,323
I'm unhappy when I'm with her.

485
00:18:33,325 --> 00:18:34,392
Flat-chested.

486
00:18:34,394 --> 00:18:35,627
What was the last one?

487
00:18:35,629 --> 00:18:37,799
She's totally flat.
Shrunken chesticles.

488
00:18:37,801 --> 00:18:39,836
No, the one before that.

489
00:18:39,838 --> 00:18:42,809
I'm unhappy when I'm with her.

490
00:18:42,811 --> 00:18:44,278
Michael...

491
00:18:44,280 --> 00:18:46,683
you shouldn't be with someone
who doesn't make you happy.

492
00:18:46,685 --> 00:18:48,053
I'm happy sometimes.

493
00:18:48,055 --> 00:18:51,259
Um...

494
00:18:51,261 --> 00:18:53,029
when we scrapbook

495
00:18:53,031 --> 00:18:55,935
or right towards the end
of having sex.

496
00:18:55,937 --> 00:18:57,371
Look, most relationships

497
00:18:57,373 --> 00:18:58,606
have their rough patches.

498
00:18:58,608 --> 00:19:00,979
You just have
to push through it sometimes.

499
00:19:00,981 --> 00:19:02,581
- Yeah, that's smart.
- Maybe.

500
00:19:02,583 --> 00:19:05,053
But it sounds like you're just
wrong for each other.

501
00:19:05,055 --> 00:19:07,024
That sounds good too.

502
00:19:09,129 --> 00:19:11,399
I don't know who's right.

503
00:19:11,401 --> 00:19:13,169
I just don't... I don't know.
I don't know.

504
00:19:13,171 --> 00:19:14,572
I bet you know.

505
00:19:14,574 --> 00:19:15,607
Don't think, just answer.

506
00:19:15,609 --> 00:19:17,211
What do you want to do
about Jan?

507
00:19:17,213 --> 00:19:19,716
I wanna break up with Jan.

508
00:19:19,718 --> 00:19:21,652
Wow.

509
00:19:21,654 --> 00:19:23,690
I wanna break up with Jan.

510
00:19:25,028 --> 00:19:26,797
My mom taught me that.

511
00:19:28,735 --> 00:19:32,608
Wow, I cannot believe
this yogurt has no calories.

512
00:19:32,610 --> 00:19:35,280
No one said it has no calories.

513
00:19:35,282 --> 00:19:37,484
Oh, hey, guys.

514
00:19:37,486 --> 00:19:39,823
I want to do something nice
for you,

515
00:19:39,825 --> 00:19:43,129
because you did something
so nice for me earlier.

516
00:19:43,131 --> 00:19:45,300
I want you to go in there.

517
00:19:45,302 --> 00:19:48,273
I want you to buy one item
on me as a thank-you.

518
00:19:48,275 --> 00:19:50,410
Come on.
Get in here.

519
00:19:50,412 --> 00:19:52,581
Let's face it, most guys
are from the Dark Ages.

520
00:19:52,583 --> 00:19:53,884
They're cavemen.

521
00:19:53,886 --> 00:19:57,024
And they like a woman
to be showing her cleavage

522
00:19:57,026 --> 00:19:59,261
and to be wearing
8-inch heels,

523
00:19:59,263 --> 00:20:04,472
and to be wearing, um,
see-through underpants.

524
00:20:04,474 --> 00:20:06,375
But...

525
00:20:06,377 --> 00:20:09,648
for me, a woman looks best

526
00:20:09,650 --> 00:20:13,189
when she
is just absolutely naked.

527
00:20:17,833 --> 00:20:20,203
This is so great, huh?

528
00:20:22,575 --> 00:20:24,678
We should do this
much more often.

529
00:20:24,680 --> 00:20:27,384
I-I think we hang out
an appropriate amount of time.

530
00:20:30,993 --> 00:20:33,163
What are you doing in here?
This is the women's room.

531
00:20:33,165 --> 00:20:34,665
You're in here.

532
00:20:34,667 --> 00:20:36,235
I pay for that privilege.

533
00:20:42,615 --> 00:20:43,918
Okay.

534
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:45,654
I'm a pretty normal guy.

535
00:20:45,656 --> 00:20:47,090
I do one weird thing.

536
00:20:47,092 --> 00:20:48,761
I like to go in the women's room

537
00:20:48,763 --> 00:20:49,896
for number two.

538
00:20:49,898 --> 00:20:51,632
I've been caught several times

539
00:20:51,634 --> 00:20:53,670
and I have paid dearly.

540
00:20:55,209 --> 00:20:56,810
Mm.

541
00:20:56,812 --> 00:20:58,346
You don't want anything?

542
00:20:58,348 --> 00:21:00,050
My treat.

543
00:21:00,052 --> 00:21:02,822
Some panties or...

544
00:21:02,824 --> 00:21:04,525
pick a thong or...

545
00:21:04,527 --> 00:21:06,195
G-string.

546
00:21:06,197 --> 00:21:07,698
T-back.

547
00:21:07,701 --> 00:21:09,068
Get a nice bra.

548
00:21:09,070 --> 00:21:10,705
Padded bra.

549
00:21:10,707 --> 00:21:13,309
See-through,
push-up, lace?

550
00:21:13,311 --> 00:21:14,779
Thigh-high?
Bustier?

551
00:21:14,781 --> 00:21:16,215
Any... it just...

552
00:21:16,217 --> 00:21:18,519
you know what,
I would love to buy you

553
00:21:18,521 --> 00:21:20,257
a fresh set of underwear.

554
00:21:20,259 --> 00:21:23,363
Phyllis.

555
00:21:23,365 --> 00:21:24,833
What do you think?
Too much?

556
00:21:24,835 --> 00:21:26,302
Jim's gonna love it.

557
00:21:33,317 --> 00:21:35,320
I'm kind of in-between
boyfriends right now.

558
00:21:35,322 --> 00:21:38,092
So I don't need anything sexy.

559
00:21:38,094 --> 00:21:40,063
But I do need
some new hand towels.

560
00:21:40,065 --> 00:21:42,802
I figure I can cut up this robe.

561
00:21:42,804 --> 00:21:45,140
Slower.

562
00:21:45,142 --> 00:21:47,010
Slower.

563
00:21:47,012 --> 00:21:48,313
Meredith.

564
00:21:49,951 --> 00:21:51,552
- Slow it up.
- Oh.

565
00:21:51,554 --> 00:21:53,356
Oh, no.

566
00:21:55,195 --> 00:21:56,228
It's Jan.

567
00:21:56,230 --> 00:21:57,631
What do I do?

568
00:21:57,633 --> 00:21:59,068
- Answer it.
- Don't answer it.

569
00:22:02,977 --> 00:22:04,445
Okay, it stopped.

570
00:22:05,682 --> 00:22:07,184
Crap.

571
00:22:07,186 --> 00:22:08,586
Whoa.

572
00:22:21,481 --> 00:22:23,049
That is pretty cool.

573
00:22:28,828 --> 00:22:30,296
Michael, you know how to, um...

574
00:22:30,298 --> 00:22:32,134
change a wheel, right?

575
00:22:32,136 --> 00:22:34,304
Uh, yeah.

576
00:22:34,306 --> 00:22:37,577
Yep. Um...

577
00:22:37,579 --> 00:22:39,348
Could somebody
grab me the lever,

578
00:22:39,350 --> 00:22:40,650
and I will...

579
00:22:40,652 --> 00:22:42,554
Here, uh... Meredith?

580
00:22:42,556 --> 00:22:44,158
Why don't you
put your hazards on.

581
00:22:44,160 --> 00:22:47,030
Yeah, get your hazards on
for safety.

582
00:22:47,032 --> 00:22:49,435
Let's see.

583
00:22:51,673 --> 00:22:53,342
There we go!

584
00:22:53,344 --> 00:22:54,946
Good.

585
00:22:54,948 --> 00:22:56,382
Yes, we have the...

586
00:22:56,384 --> 00:22:59,889
all right.

587
00:22:59,891 --> 00:23:01,592
I think I've got it.

588
00:23:05,167 --> 00:23:06,669
Do you have a...
a crescent?

589
00:23:06,671 --> 00:23:07,905
A crescent Allan?

590
00:23:07,907 --> 00:23:10,310
I don't think we really
need that, Michael.

591
00:23:10,312 --> 00:23:11,545
Uh... you know what?

592
00:23:11,547 --> 00:23:13,683
I'm going to...
you take care of that.

593
00:23:13,685 --> 00:23:15,888
I'm gonna do traffic...

594
00:23:15,890 --> 00:23:17,224
detail.

595
00:23:17,226 --> 00:23:20,363
You know, I changed
a tire today.

596
00:23:20,365 --> 00:23:22,434
All by myself.

597
00:23:22,436 --> 00:23:24,271
This bathrobe's already
coming in handy.

598
00:23:25,475 --> 00:23:28,145
Coming!

599
00:23:31,453 --> 00:23:32,788
Think we'll find him?

600
00:23:32,790 --> 00:23:34,091
Yeah, I do.

601
00:23:34,093 --> 00:23:35,761
'Cause justice never rests.

602
00:23:35,763 --> 00:23:37,664
Halvsies?

603
00:23:37,666 --> 00:23:40,136
No.
Wholesies.

604
00:23:41,974 --> 00:23:43,576
Listen, man, I really appreciate

605
00:23:43,578 --> 00:23:44,879
you letting me shadow you today.

606
00:23:44,881 --> 00:23:46,649
I feel like I learned a lot.
Natch.

607
00:23:46,651 --> 00:23:48,586
Yep.

608
00:23:48,588 --> 00:23:50,056
If you don't mind,

609
00:23:50,058 --> 00:23:51,860
I think I'll hang up
some of these posters

610
00:23:51,862 --> 00:23:53,029
around my neighborhood.

611
00:23:53,031 --> 00:23:55,633
Schools, post office, et cetera.

612
00:23:55,635 --> 00:23:58,172
You know,

613
00:23:58,174 --> 00:23:59,909
I may have underestimated you.

614
00:23:59,911 --> 00:24:02,280
You're not a total ass.

615
00:24:10,431 --> 00:24:13,569
Okay, I am
really going to do this.

616
00:24:13,571 --> 00:24:15,139
Good luck, Michael.

617
00:24:15,141 --> 00:24:17,243
You know what?
I need my girls with me.

618
00:24:17,245 --> 00:24:18,613
Pam, Karen, even Phyllis.

619
00:24:18,615 --> 00:24:19,949
Come on.
Let's do this.

620
00:24:19,951 --> 00:24:22,253
Let's do it.

621
00:24:25,662 --> 00:24:27,230
Okay, remember, be strong.

622
00:24:34,078 --> 00:24:35,580
I love you guys.

623
00:24:36,751 --> 00:24:38,619
Now I'm getting her voice-mail.

624
00:24:38,621 --> 00:24:39,789
Don't leave a...

625
00:24:39,791 --> 00:24:40,924
Hey, Jan.
It's me, Michael.

626
00:24:40,926 --> 00:24:43,362
I'm just calling to say

627
00:24:43,364 --> 00:24:46,135
that I think we need
a little break, permanently.

628
00:24:46,137 --> 00:24:49,976
And, uh, I know
everybody says this,

629
00:24:49,978 --> 00:24:53,249
but I-I wanna remain friends.

630
00:24:53,251 --> 00:24:56,055
Or at least business associates

631
00:24:56,057 --> 00:24:58,894
who get along.

632
00:24:58,896 --> 00:25:00,964
Oh, just so you know,
it's not me, it's you.

633
00:25:04,773 --> 00:25:06,375
Okay, buddy.

634
00:25:06,377 --> 00:25:07,577
Somebody just walked in.

635
00:25:07,579 --> 00:25:08,747
I have to go.

636
00:25:08,749 --> 00:25:10,416
Um, so I'll talk to you later.

637
00:25:12,757 --> 00:25:14,458
Michael...

638
00:25:14,460 --> 00:25:16,930
I was, um...

639
00:25:16,932 --> 00:25:19,134
I was really unhappy
with our conversation earlier.

640
00:25:19,136 --> 00:25:21,472
And I...

641
00:25:21,474 --> 00:25:24,344
I just... I couldn't stop
thinking about it.

642
00:25:24,346 --> 00:25:26,682
So I decided that I would
drive down here

643
00:25:26,684 --> 00:25:29,020
and apologize to you in person.

644
00:25:29,022 --> 00:25:30,958
So...

645
00:25:37,571 --> 00:25:39,241
I'm sorry.

646
00:25:39,243 --> 00:25:42,782
Thank you.

647
00:25:42,784 --> 00:25:44,819
So...

648
00:25:44,821 --> 00:25:46,688
we're good?

649
00:25:46,690 --> 00:25:48,927
Abso-fruit-ly.

650
00:25:48,929 --> 00:25:50,764
Oh.
Hold on, I'm sorry.

651
00:25:50,766 --> 00:25:52,133
No... no...

652
00:25:52,135 --> 00:25:53,335
One second.

653
00:25:55,708 --> 00:25:57,978
Oh! It's from you.

654
00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:02,687
Uh, you wanna grab some dinner?

655
00:26:02,689 --> 00:26:04,759
It's me, Michael.
Okay.

656
00:26:04,761 --> 00:26:06,094
I'm just calling to say
that I think

657
00:26:06,096 --> 00:26:08,967
we need a little break,
permanently.

658
00:26:08,969 --> 00:26:12,708
And, uh, I know
everybody says this,

659
00:26:12,710 --> 00:26:14,044
but I want...

660
00:26:14,046 --> 00:26:15,379
Maybe some Italian.

661
00:26:15,381 --> 00:26:17,852
Or at least
business associates...

662
00:26:17,854 --> 00:26:19,989
Chinese?

663
00:26:19,991 --> 00:26:21,860
Oh, just so you know,

664
00:26:21,862 --> 00:26:24,264
it's not me, it's you.

665
00:26:24,266 --> 00:26:26,535
Okay, buddy.

666
00:26:26,537 --> 00:26:27,738
Oh.

667
00:26:34,519 --> 00:26:36,555
Any man who says
he totally understands women

668
00:26:36,557 --> 00:26:38,459
is a fool.

669
00:26:38,461 --> 00:26:40,864
Because they are
un-understandable.

670
00:26:40,866 --> 00:26:44,271
There's a wishing fountain
at the mall.

671
00:26:44,273 --> 00:26:47,745
And I threw a coin in
for every woman in the world

672
00:26:47,747 --> 00:26:49,080
and made a wish.

673
00:26:49,082 --> 00:26:52,186
I wished for Jan to get over me.

674
00:26:52,188 --> 00:26:55,059
I wished for Phyllis,
a plasma TV.

675
00:26:55,061 --> 00:26:58,733
I wished for Pam
to gain courage.

676
00:26:58,735 --> 00:27:02,240
I wished for Angela, a heart,

677
00:27:02,242 --> 00:27:04,277
and for Kelly, a brain.

678
00:27:04,279 --> 00:27:06,849
"Michael, how can you
appreciate women so much

679
00:27:06,851 --> 00:27:09,487
but also dump one of them?"

680
00:27:09,489 --> 00:27:13,696
You mean, how can I be
so illogical

681
00:27:13,698 --> 00:27:15,633
and flighty and unpredictable

682
00:27:15,635 --> 00:27:17,871
and emotional?

683
00:27:20,143 --> 00:27:22,547
Well, maybe I learned something
from women after all.

684
00:27:25,188 --> 00:27:28,158
Dunder-Mifflin paper/
sex predator hotline,

685
00:27:28,160 --> 00:27:29,394
this is Dwight Schrute.

686
00:27:29,396 --> 00:27:30,964
Hey, Dwight.
It's Jim.

687
00:27:30,966 --> 00:27:33,002
Jim, what are you doing?
I'm busy.

688
00:27:33,004 --> 00:27:34,337
No, you're not.

689
00:27:34,339 --> 00:27:35,741
I'm looking right at you.

690
00:27:35,743 --> 00:27:37,076
Ugh. I'm hanging up.

691
00:27:37,078 --> 00:27:38,145
Don't.

692
00:27:38,147 --> 00:27:40,182
I have information

693
00:27:40,184 --> 00:27:41,819
about the sex predator.

694
00:27:41,821 --> 00:27:45,459
You have information
about the sex predator?

695
00:27:45,461 --> 00:27:48,265
I saw him two minutes ago.

696
00:27:48,267 --> 00:27:49,634
Where?

697
00:27:49,636 --> 00:27:52,206
In the women's bathroom,
above the sink.

698
00:27:59,355 --> 00:28:01,358
Anti-flashing task force!

699
00:28:01,360 --> 00:28:03,763
Above the sink.

700
00:28:03,765 --> 00:28:05,700
Above the sink.

701
00:28:05,702 --> 00:28:07,103
Hmm.

702
00:28:14,418 --> 00:28:16,756
Pam!

703
00:28:17,703 --> 00:28:27,713
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.