1
00:00:02,661 --> 00:00:03,787
Yeah?
You wanted to see me?

2
00:00:03,862 --> 00:00:07,354
Yes, Oscar, come on in.
Close the door if you would.

3
00:00:08,033 --> 00:00:09,864
Thank you. Thanks so
much for talking to me.

4
00:00:09,935 --> 00:00:10,959
Yeah, sure.

5
00:00:11,036 --> 00:00:13,402
I'm going in
for a procedure today.

6
00:00:13,472 --> 00:00:15,406
Is everything okay?
Yeah.

7
00:00:15,474 --> 00:00:17,669
It's routine. I'm just
a little bit scared.

8
00:00:17,743 --> 00:00:20,439
I'm sure everything
will be fine.

9
00:00:20,512 --> 00:00:23,003
What's the procedure,
if you don't mind my asking?

10
00:00:23,082 --> 00:00:24,674
It is a colonoscopy.

11
00:00:25,150 --> 00:00:26,276
Okay.

12
00:00:27,786 --> 00:00:30,346
In your experience,
what should I be expecting

13
00:00:30,422 --> 00:00:34,688
in terms of sensation
or emotions?

14
00:00:42,701 --> 00:00:47,035
Is there anything I can do to
make it more pleasurable for me,

15
00:00:47,106 --> 00:00:48,869
or for Dr. Chaudry?

16
00:00:50,876 --> 00:00:51,968
Oh, my God!

17
00:00:52,044 --> 00:00:54,239
My main concern, should
I have a safe word?

18
00:00:54,380 --> 00:00:55,574
Yeah.

19
00:00:57,560 --> 00:01:03,634
Advertise your product or brand here
contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today

20
00:01:17,503 --> 00:01:18,697
So, Michael, you think
you can give me a rundown

21
00:01:18,771 --> 00:01:20,398
on the Buffalo
clients by Monday?

22
00:01:20,472 --> 00:01:22,440
Absolutely. You know what?
I'll do you one better.

23
00:01:22,508 --> 00:01:24,032
Sunday. Sunday night.

24
00:01:24,109 --> 00:01:25,599
Okay. I will
get it Monday.

25
00:01:25,677 --> 00:01:27,372
Hold on, big guy.

26
00:01:27,446 --> 00:01:29,937
I'm going to put it in the mail
Sunday night, you'll get it Wednesday.

27
00:01:30,015 --> 00:01:31,915
Okay. Jim, you want to
hit the conference room?

28
00:01:31,984 --> 00:01:32,973
Sure.

29
00:01:33,052 --> 00:01:34,076
Hey, good luck.

30
00:01:34,286 --> 00:01:36,481
Oh, right, this thing.
I remember now.

31
00:01:36,555 --> 00:01:37,647
What's this about?

32
00:01:37,723 --> 00:01:39,350
This is just me and
David, if that's okay.

33
00:01:39,425 --> 00:01:40,949
It's okay with me. He's
going to want me in there.

34
00:01:41,026 --> 00:01:43,426
No. It's okay,
Michael. We got it.

35
00:01:43,595 --> 00:01:44,994
Really?
Yeah.

36
00:01:45,064 --> 00:01:47,259
All right. Do you mind
if I sit this out?

37
00:01:47,332 --> 00:01:51,166
I have so much work to do, I feel
like I'm going to blow my brains out.

38
00:01:52,371 --> 00:01:53,998
Okay. You got it.

39
00:02:00,379 --> 00:02:03,780
Am I worried that Jim and David
are having a meeting without me?

40
00:02:03,849 --> 00:02:07,546
No. Because we are
the three amigos.

41
00:02:08,320 --> 00:02:09,480
And once in a while,

42
00:02:09,555 --> 00:02:12,991
one of the amigos will
go off to the bathroom,

43
00:02:13,058 --> 00:02:15,891
while the other two
have a secret meeting.

44
00:02:22,367 --> 00:02:23,925
Hey, let me escort you to your desk.

45
00:02:24,002 --> 00:02:27,460
Okay. It's just three or
four steps, but thank you.

46
00:02:27,539 --> 00:02:29,700
Thank you. You and Jim are close, huh?

47
00:02:29,775 --> 00:02:32,972
Yeah. I think the pregnancy
really brought us together.

48
00:02:33,045 --> 00:02:35,980
Hey, what do you think he
and David are talking about?

49
00:02:36,048 --> 00:02:37,174
What do you...

50
00:02:37,249 --> 00:02:38,580
Um, I don't know.

51
00:02:38,650 --> 00:02:40,914
Well, you said good
luck to Jim as he walked in.

52
00:02:40,986 --> 00:02:44,615
Did I? Doesn't sound like
me. Not very superstitious.

53
00:02:49,561 --> 00:02:52,496
If you're lying to me right now, Pam,

54
00:02:52,564 --> 00:02:54,589
your baby is gonna
come out a liar.

55
00:02:56,401 --> 00:02:59,928
That's how it works. They inherit
things through the breast milk.

56
00:03:00,606 --> 00:03:02,870
Please don't talk
about my breast milk.

57
00:03:02,941 --> 00:03:05,307
I just don't want
you to lie to me.

58
00:03:05,644 --> 00:03:08,579
I don't want you to ever lie
to me. Have I ever lied to you?

59
00:03:08,647 --> 00:03:09,636
Yeah.

60
00:03:09,715 --> 00:03:11,307
I just don't
want you to.

61
00:03:11,383 --> 00:03:13,146
I was rushing
to fill an order.

62
00:03:13,218 --> 00:03:16,619
I put the ladder up to grab a box
of three hole from the top shelf,

63
00:03:16,688 --> 00:03:19,282
next thing I know, I'm on the
ground, ladder's on top of me.

64
00:03:19,391 --> 00:03:20,619
And that's how you
broke your ankle?

65
00:03:20,692 --> 00:03:21,852
Yes.

66
00:03:21,927 --> 00:03:23,895
Hmm. Interesting.

67
00:03:23,962 --> 00:03:28,023
How did the ladder end up on
top of you if you fell off of it?

68
00:03:28,100 --> 00:03:30,398
This doesn't concern you, man.
You need to walk away.

69
00:03:30,469 --> 00:03:32,733
Oh, really? I'm sorry. I
thought this was a free country.

70
00:03:32,804 --> 00:03:34,897
I didn't know we were
in Communist Sweden.

71
00:03:34,973 --> 00:03:36,031
If we were
living in Sweden,

72
00:03:36,108 --> 00:03:37,097
I wouldn't have
to worry about this

73
00:03:37,176 --> 00:03:39,110
because we'd have
universal healthcare.

74
00:03:39,845 --> 00:03:40,869
That's not... Okay.

75
00:03:40,946 --> 00:03:42,243
Be quiet.
I'm talking about...

76
00:03:42,314 --> 00:03:43,576
Hmm...

77
00:03:43,649 --> 00:03:45,116
I will send this
off to corporate.

78
00:03:45,184 --> 00:03:46,981
Make sure you hold on
to your medical bills.

79
00:03:47,052 --> 00:03:48,246
Feel better.

80
00:03:48,320 --> 00:03:50,584
Thanks, T-man. Later.

81
00:03:52,558 --> 00:03:55,186
So long, Darryl.
Feel better.

82
00:03:55,260 --> 00:03:56,818
He's lying.

83
00:03:56,895 --> 00:03:58,157
He has a doctor's note.

84
00:03:58,297 --> 00:04:02,358
From who? Dr. J? You really
need to investigate this.

85
00:04:02,434 --> 00:04:04,368
People don't just
fall off of ladders.

86
00:04:04,436 --> 00:04:05,801
Guy on my street
fell off a ladder

87
00:04:05,871 --> 00:04:07,463
painting his house.
It was on the news.

88
00:04:07,539 --> 00:04:10,337
Since when have you known
Darryl to rush to do anything

89
00:04:10,409 --> 00:04:12,843
other than to come up here
for birthday cake?

90
00:04:12,911 --> 00:04:15,141
"Y'all having birthday cake?"

91
00:04:15,214 --> 00:04:16,545
That's not a very good Darryl. Please!

92
00:04:16,615 --> 00:04:20,483
And how many foremen do
you know that pull boxes?

93
00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:23,547
It just doesn't add up.

94
00:04:26,191 --> 00:04:29,251
Well, we did a little
investigation, and Dwight had a good point.

95
00:04:29,328 --> 00:04:33,094
The ladder didn't reach the top
shelf. I don't know if I believe it,

96
00:04:33,165 --> 00:04:36,134
but I am a fan of the
hardboiled detective novel.

97
00:04:36,201 --> 00:04:38,533
"I'll punch you
into mush, see?"

98
00:04:39,504 --> 00:04:43,440
Uh-huh. Well, if he doesn't like it, you
can tell that s.o. B that he is fired.

99
00:04:43,508 --> 00:04:47,808
Sorry, I'm going into a meeting right
now. I will. I love you, too. Bye.

100
00:04:47,879 --> 00:04:48,868
Who was that?

101
00:04:48,947 --> 00:04:50,710
Sorry about that.
What'd I miss?

102
00:04:50,782 --> 00:04:53,216
Michael, we would like to continue
the rest of this meeting in private,

103
00:04:53,285 --> 00:04:54,274
please,
if you don't mind.

104
00:04:54,353 --> 00:04:55,650
I do not mind.

105
00:04:55,721 --> 00:04:58,588
Yes, I do. No, I don't.
Yes, I do. No, I don't mind.

106
00:04:58,657 --> 00:05:01,023
Catch you guys on the
flippity-flop. Oh, this...

107
00:05:01,093 --> 00:05:02,856
Call waiting. Yeah?

108
00:05:02,928 --> 00:05:05,021
Uh-huh. Well, you tell the
mayor he just lost six votes.

109
00:05:07,165 --> 00:05:09,099
They've been
in there a while.

110
00:05:09,167 --> 00:05:10,964
Yeah.
Can't be good.

111
00:05:11,603 --> 00:05:12,695
No.

112
00:05:12,771 --> 00:05:14,136
Think they're
talking about me?

113
00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:17,241
No, I think they're
talking about me.

114
00:05:17,309 --> 00:05:20,608
Yeah. That makes way more
sense. Okay. Thanks, boss.

115
00:05:21,446 --> 00:05:23,414
What is Jim telling
him? That I can't handle this job?

116
00:05:23,482 --> 00:05:25,609
That's bull crap.
That is bull crap.

117
00:05:26,618 --> 00:05:29,451
Although it has been
chaotic lately.

118
00:05:29,521 --> 00:05:31,580
Corporate shut down
the Buffalo branch,

119
00:05:31,657 --> 00:05:34,922
which left us to absorb
all of their clients.

120
00:05:34,993 --> 00:05:38,952
I will tell you, there
has been work every day.

121
00:05:39,031 --> 00:05:41,124
Had to come in
on a Saturday

122
00:05:42,034 --> 00:05:45,299
to retrieve... I left
my cell phone here.

123
00:05:46,872 --> 00:05:48,430
Hey, Kelly.

124
00:05:48,507 --> 00:05:50,839
So jealous
of your boobs.

125
00:05:51,710 --> 00:05:52,904
Thank you.

126
00:05:52,978 --> 00:05:55,344
Um, listen, I just wanted to confirm

127
00:05:55,414 --> 00:05:57,507
that you're not
coming to the wedding,

128
00:05:57,582 --> 00:06:01,018
which is totally understandable,
and more than fine.

129
00:06:01,086 --> 00:06:02,246
Is Ryan going?

130
00:06:02,321 --> 00:06:04,255
I don't know,
he hasn't RSVPed yet.

131
00:06:04,323 --> 00:06:06,757
We invited everyone in
the office to our wedding,

132
00:06:06,825 --> 00:06:08,383
even though we realized most people

133
00:06:08,460 --> 00:06:11,725
wouldn't be able to make
the drive to Niagara Falls.

134
00:06:12,097 --> 00:06:15,260
Which is why we're
having it in Niagara Falls.

135
00:06:15,901 --> 00:06:17,869
Then Michael
told everyone

136
00:06:17,936 --> 00:06:21,394
they could have Friday and
Monday off if they came.

137
00:06:21,473 --> 00:06:25,341
So now, people have to decide if
they want to come to our wedding

138
00:06:25,410 --> 00:06:27,401
or have to work.

139
00:06:27,479 --> 00:06:29,572
Here's the deal.
I really want to go.

140
00:06:29,648 --> 00:06:31,445
But I'm not gonna go
if Ryan doesn't go,

141
00:06:31,516 --> 00:06:33,609
because it's kind of
a waste of time.

142
00:06:33,685 --> 00:06:34,811
That came out wrong.

143
00:06:34,886 --> 00:06:36,547
It would be awesome if you
could try to get him to go

144
00:06:36,621 --> 00:06:39,886
because I'd really like
to be there to support Jim.

145
00:06:44,229 --> 00:06:46,390
What can I do
for you, hoss?

146
00:06:46,898 --> 00:06:48,160
How are your
sales doing?

147
00:06:48,233 --> 00:06:50,133
How are my sales doing?

148
00:06:50,736 --> 00:06:51,964
Busted.

149
00:06:53,071 --> 00:06:55,562
You know, my numbers
are down a little bit.

150
00:06:55,640 --> 00:06:57,801
And it's 'cause
of the economy.

151
00:06:58,910 --> 00:07:01,743
You're not buying it.
You're good.

152
00:07:01,813 --> 00:07:03,804
Okay, the truth is

153
00:07:03,882 --> 00:07:06,783
I have been having trouble
focusing lately. I'm in this weird,

154
00:07:06,852 --> 00:07:11,687
flirty, nebulous thing
with this cousin of mine.

155
00:07:12,491 --> 00:07:14,254
And it's a total mind f'er.

156
00:07:14,326 --> 00:07:16,021
Again with the cousin.

157
00:07:16,094 --> 00:07:17,755
Oh, I'm sorry, Phyllis.

158
00:07:17,829 --> 00:07:19,660
You explain
this email. Okay?

159
00:07:19,731 --> 00:07:24,134
"Hey, Andy, let's go visit Grandma
and then get drunk together. Ha, ha."

160
00:07:24,202 --> 00:07:27,660
Shh. I'm just trying to figure out
what's going on in that room, okay?

161
00:07:27,739 --> 00:07:29,570
Wallace
had to show up

162
00:07:29,641 --> 00:07:33,475
on the one four-month period
that I'm completely overwhelmed.

163
00:07:35,180 --> 00:07:38,581
You know when they say, "It's
so crazy it just might work?"

164
00:07:39,184 --> 00:07:42,847
Well, I don't believe that. I
say go for the airtight plan.

165
00:07:42,921 --> 00:07:44,752
And that is why
I am having Andy

166
00:07:44,823 --> 00:07:46,347
wheel me into
the conference room

167
00:07:46,425 --> 00:07:48,359
inside a makeshift
cheese cart.

168
00:07:49,027 --> 00:07:52,827
It is just elegant.

169
00:07:56,201 --> 00:07:57,566
Be my eyes.
You got it.

170
00:07:57,636 --> 00:07:59,501
What have we here?
Oh!

171
00:07:59,571 --> 00:08:00,595
Hello.

172
00:08:00,672 --> 00:08:01,934
Just backing up
and turning around.

173
00:08:02,007 --> 00:08:02,996
Hey, we're
gonna do this...

174
00:08:03,074 --> 00:08:05,133
It's not for you.

175
00:08:08,780 --> 00:08:12,272
I took the liberty of preparing
for you a cheese platter,

176
00:08:12,350 --> 00:08:16,446
which I will place here on the
eastern wall of the conference room.

177
00:08:16,521 --> 00:08:17,579
Cheese platter?

178
00:08:18,890 --> 00:08:22,189
From the Wisconsin region,
a nice, firm cheddar.

179
00:08:23,028 --> 00:08:26,828
Also from the great state of
Wisconsin, an aged Parmesan.

180
00:08:27,365 --> 00:08:30,095
Here you will find
a cheddar-style spread,

181
00:08:30,168 --> 00:08:34,264
which has reacted nicely with
the air to form a light rind,

182
00:08:34,339 --> 00:08:36,967
which I think you'll find both
challenging and delicious.

183
00:08:37,042 --> 00:08:38,976
At that point, I would
recommend you take

184
00:08:39,044 --> 00:08:42,070
a quick trip south of the border
to the great state of Illinois,

185
00:08:42,147 --> 00:08:45,139
where you will find this
fine blue cheese dressing.

186
00:08:45,217 --> 00:08:46,878
If I may be so bold,

187
00:08:46,952 --> 00:08:49,750
it's a lot of fun
to let the goldfish

188
00:08:49,821 --> 00:08:52,585
take a little swim
in the blue cheese.

189
00:08:55,727 --> 00:08:58,958
All right, well, I should
go. Thanks for this.

190
00:08:59,564 --> 00:09:00,758
You've given me
a lot to think about.

191
00:09:00,832 --> 00:09:02,857
Please promise me you won't
do anything until we speak.

192
00:09:02,934 --> 00:09:04,401
No, I won't.

193
00:09:05,537 --> 00:09:07,004
All right. Hey,
thanks for taking the time.

194
00:09:07,072 --> 00:09:09,666
Yeah. Appreciate it.
Thank you, Jim.

195
00:09:15,580 --> 00:09:17,138
Erin,
is Michael around?

196
00:09:17,215 --> 00:09:19,308
I think
he's around here.

197
00:09:20,685 --> 00:09:21,947
Is that...

198
00:09:22,020 --> 00:09:23,180
Hey, hey, hey.

199
00:09:23,255 --> 00:09:25,189
You must have walked right
past me. How you doing?

200
00:09:25,257 --> 00:09:26,690
Yeah. Could we talk in
your office for a sec?

201
00:09:26,758 --> 00:09:28,692
Yes, definitely.

202
00:09:28,760 --> 00:09:29,954
Okay.

203
00:09:37,836 --> 00:09:42,239
It sounds
like a EMD P40:

204
00:09:42,307 --> 00:09:44,741
Nah. That's a GE.

205
00:09:45,377 --> 00:09:46,901
The P40 is much
higher-pitched.

206
00:09:46,978 --> 00:09:48,411
You're into trains?

207
00:09:48,480 --> 00:09:50,072
Have been my whole life. Wow!

208
00:09:50,148 --> 00:09:52,708
I'm rebuilding a
turn-of-the-century steam engine

209
00:09:52,784 --> 00:09:54,308
in my slaughterhouse.

210
00:09:54,386 --> 00:09:56,320
That's so cool.
Yeah.

211
00:09:56,388 --> 00:09:58,015
Wow! I'd love to take a look at that.

212
00:09:58,089 --> 00:09:59,681
Yeah. It's just a
run-of-the-mill slaughterhouse,

213
00:09:59,758 --> 00:10:00,747
but sure, anytime.

214
00:10:00,825 --> 00:10:03,157
Well, you know,
because of the trains.

215
00:10:03,228 --> 00:10:05,093
Wait, someone's coming.
Oh, boy. Oh, boy.

216
00:10:05,163 --> 00:10:07,563
It's Darryl! Get down!
He's not using crutches!

217
00:10:07,632 --> 00:10:09,224
Get the camera.
Start taping.

218
00:10:09,301 --> 00:10:10,325
Drive!

219
00:10:10,402 --> 00:10:12,267
Worker's comp, my ass!

220
00:10:12,337 --> 00:10:13,964
I can't believe this.

221
00:10:14,039 --> 00:10:15,199
Hey, you ass!

222
00:10:15,273 --> 00:10:16,297
Toby!

223
00:10:16,374 --> 00:10:19,104
You gonna eat all
that dog food yourself?

224
00:10:20,211 --> 00:10:22,338
No, no!

225
00:10:23,548 --> 00:10:24,845
Oh, man!
You okay?

226
00:10:24,916 --> 00:10:25,940
Just drive.

227
00:10:30,922 --> 00:10:32,583
Hey, Ryan.
Hey.

228
00:10:32,657 --> 00:10:35,592
So, I just wanted to confirm that
you're not coming to my wedding.

229
00:10:35,660 --> 00:10:37,719
Yeah, I might stop by.

230
00:10:37,796 --> 00:10:39,821
It costs about
$75 per person.

231
00:10:39,898 --> 00:10:43,425
Okay. I once had a glass of
Cognac that cost $77, so...

232
00:10:43,501 --> 00:10:46,493
Can you just tell me now
if you're coming or not?

233
00:10:47,005 --> 00:10:49,769
Yes. I'm coming
to your wedding.

234
00:10:49,841 --> 00:10:51,775
Okay. Ryan Howard, yes.

235
00:10:51,843 --> 00:10:53,401
Probably yes.

236
00:10:53,478 --> 00:10:55,173
Kelly Kapoor, yes.

237
00:10:55,680 --> 00:10:58,672
Are you sure you're okay with
these new responsibilities?

238
00:10:58,750 --> 00:10:59,978
Look who you're talking to.

239
00:11:00,051 --> 00:11:03,748
Just trying to figure out the best
way to utilize everyone's talents.

240
00:11:03,822 --> 00:11:05,949
Well, I would say
that my greatest talent

241
00:11:06,024 --> 00:11:09,391
is being the best
man, woman or child

242
00:11:09,461 --> 00:11:11,088
to have ever run
this branch. Ever.

243
00:11:11,162 --> 00:11:12,186
And what about Jim?

244
00:11:12,263 --> 00:11:13,753
You think Jim is
someone who is ready

245
00:11:13,832 --> 00:11:16,562
to move into
a management position?

246
00:11:21,573 --> 00:11:23,302
Permission to speak
on the record.

247
00:11:23,375 --> 00:11:24,672
Please do.

248
00:11:24,743 --> 00:11:27,735
Jim is like Big Bird.

249
00:11:27,812 --> 00:11:32,181
He is tall and yellow
and very nice.

250
00:11:32,250 --> 00:11:34,650
But would I put him
in charge? No.

251
00:11:35,186 --> 00:11:39,623
I don't think so. He... Big Bird
doesn't make the tough decisions.

252
00:11:40,492 --> 00:11:44,553
If I was going to put someone in
charge, I would put Bert in charge.

253
00:11:44,629 --> 00:11:46,529
Or I would put one of the
real grownups in charge,

254
00:11:46,598 --> 00:11:47,622
like Maria.

255
00:11:47,699 --> 00:11:49,030
Or Gordon, maybe.

256
00:11:49,100 --> 00:11:50,260
I thought you liked Jim.

257
00:11:50,335 --> 00:11:52,599
Very much.
Jim is my best friend.

258
00:11:52,671 --> 00:11:55,435
But here's his
performance report.

259
00:11:57,475 --> 00:11:58,874
Right here.

260
00:11:58,943 --> 00:12:01,741
Now, this was
written by Toby,

261
00:12:01,813 --> 00:12:05,180
who we all know is
extremely reliable.

262
00:12:05,850 --> 00:12:09,513
"Constant office distraction. Spends
way too much time at reception.

263
00:12:09,587 --> 00:12:12,852
"Antagonizes other salesmen.
Not at all what he thinks he is."

264
00:12:12,924 --> 00:12:16,052
It's not very well written.
But you get the gist.

265
00:12:16,127 --> 00:12:19,494
Is there anybody else you think could
run the day-to-day of the branch?

266
00:12:19,564 --> 00:12:21,725
I could just continue
to run it myself, that's...

267
00:12:21,800 --> 00:12:25,600
Jim had an interesting idea to
help you with this extra workload.

268
00:12:25,670 --> 00:12:27,661
And it involved
you being promoted

269
00:12:27,739 --> 00:12:30,139
to oversee all
northeast sales.

270
00:12:30,208 --> 00:12:33,302
And then Jim would be
promoted to your position.

271
00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:37,074
This was Jim's idea?

272
00:12:37,148 --> 00:12:38,137
Mmm-hmm.

273
00:12:39,317 --> 00:12:40,579
Wow!

274
00:12:43,154 --> 00:12:49,093
Well, I'd have to talk to my
mother and my guy at H&R Block.

275
00:12:52,063 --> 00:12:53,860
Okay. But, well, see,
here's the thing, though.

276
00:12:53,932 --> 00:12:55,490
The plan doesn't work

277
00:12:55,567 --> 00:12:58,229
unless we have someone to
replace you. I was hoping...

278
00:12:59,370 --> 00:13:02,601
Plus, we have to worry about
Jim. He has another job offer.

279
00:13:02,674 --> 00:13:04,904
We may have to replace him.

280
00:13:04,976 --> 00:13:08,742
I didn't tell Michael because
I thought he'd try to help.

281
00:13:09,714 --> 00:13:13,912
Example, he handed out Jell-O shots at
the 23rd mile of the Steamtown Marathon.

282
00:13:17,021 --> 00:13:19,251
Jim, can you walk me down
to my car for a second?

283
00:13:19,324 --> 00:13:20,484
Sure.

284
00:13:42,046 --> 00:13:45,504
I can't help but feel
partially responsible.

285
00:13:54,025 --> 00:13:58,724
Little pick-me-up. Those
are the best. Sugar rush.

286
00:13:58,797 --> 00:14:01,265
When you were in the office
earlier talking to Wallace,

287
00:14:01,332 --> 00:14:03,459
did I come up at all?

288
00:14:04,803 --> 00:14:07,636
Well, we did talk about
how handsome you are.

289
00:14:07,705 --> 00:14:09,036
Why don't we head into
your office and talk?

290
00:14:09,107 --> 00:14:12,736
Okay. What did
we... God! We said...

291
00:14:13,511 --> 00:14:16,446
I know there were
certain things we said.

292
00:14:16,915 --> 00:14:18,610
Michael, look.
I'll just be honest with you.

293
00:14:18,683 --> 00:14:21,550
Earlier today, I spoke with
Wallace about a promotion.

294
00:14:21,619 --> 00:14:23,177
And I actually think
that talk went really well.

295
00:14:23,254 --> 00:14:24,278
Mmm-hmm.

296
00:14:24,355 --> 00:14:25,686
And then,
after he spoke with you,

297
00:14:25,757 --> 00:14:28,317
for some reason, it felt
like things had changed.

298
00:14:28,393 --> 00:14:30,759
Hmm. That's weird.
That's weird.

299
00:14:31,830 --> 00:14:33,491
Kind of weirding me out.

300
00:14:33,565 --> 00:14:36,295
Did you know that Lincoln's
secretary was named Kennedy?

301
00:14:36,367 --> 00:14:38,699
Michael,
did you say anything?

302
00:14:39,070 --> 00:14:41,732
Tell you what,
when you leave this office,

303
00:14:41,806 --> 00:14:43,933
I'm going to call Wallace
and I'm going to tell him

304
00:14:44,008 --> 00:14:45,771
that you should
get that promotion.

305
00:14:45,844 --> 00:14:46,936
Really?
Yes.

306
00:14:47,011 --> 00:14:48,410
You will?
Yes.

307
00:14:48,479 --> 00:14:49,969
Wanna do it right now?

308
00:14:50,048 --> 00:14:51,037
Yes.

309
00:14:52,217 --> 00:14:54,913
I tried to keep
Michael in the dark.

310
00:14:56,588 --> 00:15:00,649
I should have known that he can
do just as much damage in the dark.

311
00:15:00,892 --> 00:15:02,154
I need to see
your pupils.

312
00:15:02,227 --> 00:15:03,660
I have to see if
they're dilating...

313
00:15:03,728 --> 00:15:05,457
Toby! Dwight!

314
00:15:06,431 --> 00:15:07,659
Is that them?

315
00:15:07,732 --> 00:15:08,926
Definitely.

316
00:15:10,034 --> 00:15:13,003
You come to my house,
bust up my trash cans,

317
00:15:13,071 --> 00:15:15,972
call my baby sister an ass
and told her to eat dog food?

318
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:17,735
We thought that
she was you.

319
00:15:17,809 --> 00:15:20,004
Why would you think
a lady is me?

320
00:15:23,715 --> 00:15:28,243
Are you serious? Because
you look exactly alike.

321
00:15:28,319 --> 00:15:29,513
Am I the only one?
- That's too far...

322
00:15:29,587 --> 00:15:31,452
Are you getting this?
I mean...

323
00:15:31,522 --> 00:15:32,511
I don't see it.

324
00:15:32,590 --> 00:15:34,387
Here's what
I'm gonna do.

325
00:15:34,459 --> 00:15:37,917
I'm calling corporate and I'm filing
a complaint against both of you.

326
00:15:37,996 --> 00:15:39,224
Oh, Darryl.

327
00:15:39,297 --> 00:15:40,457
Come on, Gwyneth.

328
00:15:41,766 --> 00:15:42,824
Sad.

329
00:15:44,369 --> 00:15:45,859
This is David.

330
00:15:46,704 --> 00:15:48,695
Hey, David,
this is Michael...

331
00:15:50,074 --> 00:15:51,541
Michael Scott here.
Yeah.

332
00:15:51,609 --> 00:15:53,873
Just wanted to talk to
you about Jim Halpert.

333
00:15:53,945 --> 00:15:58,006
I understand that he did
not receive that promotion,

334
00:15:58,082 --> 00:16:00,050
and I wanted to see
what I could do

335
00:16:00,118 --> 00:16:02,518
to nudge you in the right direction.

336
00:16:03,121 --> 00:16:05,715
So, what, you're changing
your mind about Jim?

337
00:16:05,790 --> 00:16:10,420
Absolutely not!
Like I said before,

338
00:16:10,495 --> 00:16:13,987
Jim is fantastic
and he deserves this job.

339
00:16:14,966 --> 00:16:17,230
Michael, it seems like
you're cutting in and out.

340
00:16:17,302 --> 00:16:20,294
This is not what
you said earlier.

341
00:16:20,371 --> 00:16:21,998
What... Here's the thing.

342
00:16:23,141 --> 00:16:24,608
Jim is the best
man for this job.

343
00:16:24,676 --> 00:16:25,973
I think you should
give it to him.

344
00:16:26,044 --> 00:16:28,308
Well, it doesn't change what
you showed me in Jim's file.

345
00:16:28,379 --> 00:16:29,744
What?
Well...

346
00:16:30,848 --> 00:16:33,248
That was an anomaly.

347
00:16:33,918 --> 00:16:39,584
That file had been falsified.
Toby Flenderson is doing drugs.

348
00:16:39,657 --> 00:16:41,591
Michael, I really don't know
what's going on down there, but...

349
00:16:42,727 --> 00:16:44,285
Oh, damn it!

350
00:16:44,362 --> 00:16:47,889
I am getting pulled over for
talking on my cell. Damn it!

351
00:16:51,703 --> 00:16:56,140
Hey, Darryl, look,
we're here to apologize.

352
00:16:56,207 --> 00:16:57,401
We're cool.
- Wait.

353
00:16:57,475 --> 00:16:59,705
They're using the lift as
their own personal elevator.

354
00:16:59,777 --> 00:17:01,369
What?
He broke his ankle

355
00:17:01,446 --> 00:17:03,539
climbing over the railing,
then he lied about it

356
00:17:03,614 --> 00:17:06,378
because it was a misuse
of company equipment.

357
00:17:06,451 --> 00:17:07,941
Case closed.

358
00:17:08,019 --> 00:17:09,452
Stupidest thing
I ever heard.

359
00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:13,388
Really? Then why is there
new wood only on one railing?

360
00:17:14,592 --> 00:17:17,288
Let's just check
the security tapes, Toby.

361
00:17:18,129 --> 00:17:21,189
Well, you know, I don't think
there's any reason to check them,

362
00:17:21,265 --> 00:17:24,462
but I suppose if we wanted
to be really certain.

363
00:17:24,535 --> 00:17:26,799
All right. Yeah.
Fine, so whatever.

364
00:17:26,871 --> 00:17:27,860
Yes!

365
00:17:27,939 --> 00:17:29,167
You really did it.

366
00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:32,937
Now, I would like to file an
official complaint to corporate

367
00:17:33,011 --> 00:17:36,412
because Darryl lied
on an official form.

368
00:17:36,481 --> 00:17:39,041
And I'm telling them you guys
sexually harassed my sister.

369
00:17:39,117 --> 00:17:42,348
No judge
is gonna believe that.

370
00:17:44,822 --> 00:17:46,119
Okay.

371
00:17:46,691 --> 00:17:49,125
Look, we could all file
complaints against each other

372
00:17:49,193 --> 00:17:51,957
and just drown in a sea
of paperwork, but,

373
00:17:52,030 --> 00:17:55,227
you know, we'll just
move on with our lives.

374
00:17:56,501 --> 00:18:01,404
So, Dwight and Darryl came to an
agreement that they would both file

375
00:18:01,472 --> 00:18:02,996
complaints
with corporate,

376
00:18:03,074 --> 00:18:05,702
and now I get to do
all this paperwork.

377
00:18:07,078 --> 00:18:08,705
We worked it out.

378
00:18:11,582 --> 00:18:14,745
Hey, hey, Jim. It would make
me feel really good right now

379
00:18:14,819 --> 00:18:18,186
if you would just punch me in
the face, all right? Just do it.

380
00:18:18,256 --> 00:18:19,746
How many times
have I asked you

381
00:18:19,824 --> 00:18:21,291
to put me up for
a branch manager job?

382
00:18:21,359 --> 00:18:24,328
I never recommended you because
I didn't want to lose you.

383
00:18:24,395 --> 00:18:26,056
And I didn't
want to lose Pam.

384
00:18:26,130 --> 00:18:27,688
Now I don't want
to lose the baby.

385
00:18:27,765 --> 00:18:29,665
So, instead,
you screwed me?

386
00:18:29,734 --> 00:18:31,793
That's what she said.
No.

387
00:18:32,970 --> 00:18:33,959
David Wallace
is calling.

388
00:18:34,038 --> 00:18:35,164
We're kind of in the
middle of something here.

389
00:18:35,239 --> 00:18:36,228
Should I tell him
you'll call back?

390
00:18:36,307 --> 00:18:39,504
Yeah. No.
I'll tell him myself.

391
00:18:39,977 --> 00:18:41,467
Let's both.

392
00:18:45,683 --> 00:18:46,672
Hello?

393
00:18:46,751 --> 00:18:47,979
Hey, Michael.
Yes.

394
00:18:48,052 --> 00:18:49,212
You got Jim
there with you?

395
00:18:49,287 --> 00:18:50,754
No, it's just us.

396
00:18:50,822 --> 00:18:53,689
Actually, can you call Jim in?
I want him on this. Please.

397
00:18:53,758 --> 00:18:56,352
Oh! Well, here
he is right now.

398
00:18:57,628 --> 00:18:58,856
Come in.

399
00:19:04,936 --> 00:19:06,403
Hi, David.

400
00:19:06,471 --> 00:19:09,338
Hey, guys.
So, I spoke to Alan.

401
00:19:09,407 --> 00:19:12,865
We had kind of an unconventional
idea, which I think is pretty cool.

402
00:19:12,944 --> 00:19:15,504
But it only works if
everyone's on board.

403
00:19:15,580 --> 00:19:18,242
Well, just as long as it
means Jim becomes a manager.

404
00:19:18,316 --> 00:19:21,615
We were thinking of having two
branch managers in Scranton.

405
00:19:21,686 --> 00:19:24,120
Both of you guys
working as co-managers.

406
00:19:24,188 --> 00:19:25,553
Jim would handle
the day-to-day,

407
00:19:25,623 --> 00:19:28,990
and Michael, you would focus on
clients and big picture stuff.

408
00:19:29,060 --> 00:19:30,288
Wow!
That sounds pretty cool.

409
00:19:30,361 --> 00:19:31,589
I like that!

410
00:19:31,662 --> 00:19:33,459
So, manager
and co-manager.

411
00:19:33,531 --> 00:19:35,624
Co-manager and co-manager.

412
00:19:35,700 --> 00:19:37,190
See, there are a lot
of moving pieces

413
00:19:37,268 --> 00:19:39,634
and this is the only way
I can sell it upstairs.

414
00:19:39,704 --> 00:19:41,467
Well, that might be a
little confusing for people

415
00:19:41,539 --> 00:19:43,700
because they
know me as manager.

416
00:19:44,375 --> 00:19:47,674
All right, hey, Michael, can
you pick up for one second?

417
00:19:48,379 --> 00:19:51,143
Okay, look, I'm not going
to force you into anything.

418
00:19:51,215 --> 00:19:53,376
If you're willing
to lose Jim, fine.

419
00:19:53,451 --> 00:19:56,545
You just say so. We'll
find another solution. Okay?

420
00:19:57,455 --> 00:19:59,548
Is that what
you want to do?

421
00:20:06,130 --> 00:20:07,757
Okay, people, listen up!
- Okay, everybody.

422
00:20:07,832 --> 00:20:09,823
I have an announcement to make.

423
00:20:09,901 --> 00:20:11,129
Fraud was committed in... Whoa!

424
00:20:11,202 --> 00:20:12,191
Do you have
an announcement?

425
00:20:12,270 --> 00:20:13,635
I was making it.

426
00:20:13,704 --> 00:20:16,537
Everybody, David Wallace
and I have talked,

427
00:20:16,607 --> 00:20:20,600
and we have decided to promote
Jim to the position of co-manager.

428
00:20:21,345 --> 00:20:22,437
Co-manager of what?

429
00:20:22,513 --> 00:20:24,344
Of your butt!

430
00:20:25,016 --> 00:20:28,952
And your butt, and your butt, and your
butt. All of Scranton branch butts.

431
00:20:29,020 --> 00:20:30,544
What's happening
to you, Michael?

432
00:20:30,621 --> 00:20:31,747
What's happening to me?

433
00:20:31,822 --> 00:20:34,256
I am also being
promoted to co-manager.

434
00:20:34,325 --> 00:20:36,691
We will be
co-managers together.

435
00:20:38,029 --> 00:20:40,793
Jim Halpert, welcome.

436
00:20:40,865 --> 00:20:42,230
Thank you.

437
00:20:51,008 --> 00:20:53,806
Niagara Falls in October?
Hells yeah!

438
00:20:53,878 --> 00:20:57,314
Do you think that you could
send in your RSVP card?

439
00:20:57,381 --> 00:20:58,814
No. I'll just
tell you now. Easier.

440
00:20:58,883 --> 00:21:01,215
Well, you have to
choose a food option,

441
00:21:01,285 --> 00:21:03,776
and there's information in there
about directions and lodging.

442
00:21:03,854 --> 00:21:06,721
I'll just have whatever's
fanciest, unless there's ribs,

443
00:21:06,791 --> 00:21:09,385
and I'll just get all the other
information the day of. I'll text you.

444
00:21:09,460 --> 00:21:12,486
You are going to text me
the morning of my wedding

445
00:21:12,563 --> 00:21:14,030
to ask for directions...
Mmm-hmm. Right.

446
00:21:14,098 --> 00:21:16,396
and you will eat
whatever is fanciest?

447
00:21:16,467 --> 00:21:17,798
Unless there's ribs.

448
00:21:19,136 --> 00:21:20,194
Rude.

449
00:21:20,271 --> 00:21:22,171
So rude, right?
Mmm-hmm.

450
00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:25,539
Oh, my gosh. I have been
chasing people down all day.

451
00:21:25,610 --> 00:21:26,599
It's incredible.

452
00:21:26,677 --> 00:21:28,338
Pam, my bag was there.

453
00:21:28,865 --> 00:21:38,865
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