1 00:00:01,090 --> 00:00:03,854 Look at that, huh? Nice! 2 00:00:04,127 --> 00:00:05,651 I love cycling. 3 00:00:05,728 --> 00:00:07,525 Andy, I feel like a tourist in my own city. 4 00:00:07,597 --> 00:00:09,087 I literally can't wait to wake up every morning. 5 00:00:09,299 --> 00:00:10,960 Okay. She is a beaut. 6 00:00:11,034 --> 00:00:13,468 Can't beat a horse. A horse is a bike that pedals itself. 7 00:00:13,536 --> 00:00:14,662 Yes, it is. 8 00:00:14,737 --> 00:00:15,795 Look at that, smooth roll. 9 00:00:15,872 --> 00:00:17,169 - Yeah. - You got it! 10 00:00:17,240 --> 00:00:18,298 Lance Armstrong's bike. 11 00:00:18,374 --> 00:00:19,363 Yes! 12 00:00:19,442 --> 00:00:22,536 His ass was on that seat? All right! Nice. 13 00:00:22,612 --> 00:00:24,204 No, Meredith, it's not his actual bicycle. 14 00:00:24,280 --> 00:00:26,908 But it is the same exact model he uses. 15 00:00:27,016 --> 00:00:28,813 I'm on Sheryl Crow's side in that whole thing, 16 00:00:28,885 --> 00:00:30,614 so I feel really weird right now. 17 00:00:30,687 --> 00:00:32,052 - Michael! - Oh, God! 18 00:00:33,189 --> 00:00:35,214 Yes, I can ride a bike. 19 00:00:35,291 --> 00:00:37,919 I take spinning classes three times a month. 20 00:00:38,494 --> 00:00:40,018 I think I know how to ride a bike. 21 00:00:40,163 --> 00:00:41,528 Are you sure you once knew how to do this? 22 00:00:41,598 --> 00:00:42,895 I did, yes! 23 00:00:42,966 --> 00:00:46,834 I had those extra wheels on the back that support you. 24 00:00:46,903 --> 00:00:48,666 Michael! Michael! 25 00:00:48,938 --> 00:00:49,996 Michael! Michael! 26 00:00:50,073 --> 00:00:51,062 Michael! Michael! 27 00:00:51,140 --> 00:00:52,232 Michael! Michael! 28 00:00:52,308 --> 00:00:53,332 Michael! Yeah! 29 00:00:53,409 --> 00:00:54,433 - All right! - Yeah! 30 00:00:54,510 --> 00:00:55,499 Just steer more now. 31 00:00:55,578 --> 00:00:56,602 Oh, my God! 32 00:00:56,679 --> 00:00:58,203 Not the car! No, no. 33 00:01:03,586 --> 00:01:04,814 You never forget. 34 00:01:05,890 --> 00:01:11,964 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 35 00:01:30,113 --> 00:01:31,444 How do I look? 36 00:01:31,514 --> 00:01:32,811 Amazing. How do I look? 37 00:01:33,750 --> 00:01:35,274 Normal. Ugly. 38 00:01:35,918 --> 00:01:37,783 Well, I do the best with what I've got. 39 00:01:37,854 --> 00:01:39,651 Let's go. All right. 40 00:01:40,556 --> 00:01:43,992 Wait, wait, wait, wait for me. It's weird if I come in slightly after. 41 00:01:44,193 --> 00:01:48,061 We have a big meeting with the chief buyer for Frames Select, Steve Nash. 42 00:01:48,131 --> 00:01:50,099 He's not "the" Steve Nash. He's... 43 00:01:50,166 --> 00:01:52,191 He's big, though. He's kind of like Scranton's Steve Nash. 44 00:01:52,268 --> 00:01:54,759 Will you stop trying to put it in terms you think they'll understand? 45 00:01:54,837 --> 00:01:55,861 It's condescending. 46 00:01:55,938 --> 00:01:57,599 I'm not doing that. I'm just explaining. 47 00:01:57,674 --> 00:02:00,234 And who is this "the" Steve Nash? 48 00:02:00,977 --> 00:02:02,444 Phoenix Suns' point guard? 49 00:02:02,512 --> 00:02:03,877 No. No? Nothing? 50 00:02:03,946 --> 00:02:05,846 No, Mr. Jock Hipster. 51 00:02:05,915 --> 00:02:08,645 Well, I'm neither of those things, so... 52 00:02:09,919 --> 00:02:10,908 Oh ho. 53 00:02:11,254 --> 00:02:13,017 Libby Dirketts got married. 54 00:02:13,089 --> 00:02:15,887 Big, red mazel tov to the Libster. 55 00:02:16,492 --> 00:02:17,481 Ooh. 56 00:02:17,560 --> 00:02:20,529 It says here Dan Becker fell off the side of Kilimanjaro 57 00:02:20,596 --> 00:02:21,893 in a climbing accident. 58 00:02:22,198 --> 00:02:23,893 It appears Dan's Sherpa survived 59 00:02:23,966 --> 00:02:25,593 to tell the tale... Oh, my God! 60 00:02:25,835 --> 00:02:27,029 What? Is Dan okay? 61 00:02:27,170 --> 00:02:28,762 No, he died. 62 00:02:28,838 --> 00:02:30,430 It's Broccoli Rob. 63 00:02:30,506 --> 00:02:32,667 You know this guy. I showed you his picture on Facebook. 64 00:02:33,443 --> 00:02:34,467 Yes. 65 00:02:34,544 --> 00:02:39,140 "Some Vermont-based alums can hear 'Broccoli' Rob Blatt, '96, 66 00:02:39,215 --> 00:02:42,480 "in the state milk lobby's new milk awareness song Calci-yum, 67 00:02:42,552 --> 00:02:44,645 "featuring Phish's Trey Anastasio. 68 00:02:44,721 --> 00:02:47,383 "Says Broccoli, 'Trey and I had a ton of fun in the studio, 69 00:02:47,457 --> 00:02:48,981 "'and I think you can hear it in the song."' 70 00:02:49,092 --> 00:02:50,821 Oh, that's great news for your friend. 71 00:02:51,794 --> 00:02:53,227 Yeah. Yeah. It's great. 72 00:02:53,296 --> 00:02:56,322 You know, I forget about milk. This is a terrific reminder. 73 00:03:00,203 --> 00:03:02,501 I was the artsy musical one. 74 00:03:03,139 --> 00:03:06,438 In Here Comes Treble, I had four solos, Broccoli Rob had three. 75 00:03:06,509 --> 00:03:07,737 Right? 76 00:03:12,749 --> 00:03:15,616 Go tell her we're here. You're good with receptionists. Ha. 77 00:03:18,154 --> 00:03:19,416 Dwight. 78 00:03:24,360 --> 00:03:25,452 Crap. 79 00:03:26,796 --> 00:03:28,320 Danny Cordray is the worst. 80 00:03:28,398 --> 00:03:29,729 Well, by worst, you mean the best. 81 00:03:29,799 --> 00:03:31,664 The best salesman ever. 82 00:03:31,734 --> 00:03:33,429 He works for Osprey Paper over in Throop, 83 00:03:33,503 --> 00:03:35,471 steals more clients from Dunder Mifflin than anyone. 84 00:03:35,538 --> 00:03:37,165 So the situation is the worst. 85 00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:38,639 Also, he slept with Pam. 86 00:03:38,708 --> 00:03:40,198 No, he didn't. 87 00:03:43,646 --> 00:03:46,240 Tell them. Nothing happened. 88 00:03:46,315 --> 00:03:49,409 We went on a couple of dates. He never called me again. 89 00:03:49,485 --> 00:03:52,147 What? He never called you? I thought you said it just fizzled. 90 00:03:52,221 --> 00:03:54,712 That's fizzling. I mean, someone has to start the fizzle. 91 00:03:54,791 --> 00:03:56,053 Yeah, I thought you started it. 92 00:03:56,125 --> 00:03:57,956 No, I liked him. 93 00:03:58,027 --> 00:04:00,018 For a couple of days. 94 00:04:00,096 --> 00:04:01,620 Four years ago. 95 00:04:03,433 --> 00:04:05,060 You know I have a kid with you, right? 96 00:04:05,134 --> 00:04:06,396 Aah! 97 00:04:09,272 --> 00:04:10,671 I'm gonna intimidate him. Okay? 98 00:04:10,740 --> 00:04:11,764 Okay, great. 99 00:04:11,841 --> 00:04:13,468 I'm just gonna watch. Watch this. 100 00:04:13,543 --> 00:04:16,706 So anyway, she says, "That is the biggest penis I have ever seen." 101 00:04:16,779 --> 00:04:18,007 And I said, "I know. 102 00:04:18,080 --> 00:04:20,071 "That's why I brought you to the penis museum, 103 00:04:20,149 --> 00:04:23,641 "where tickets are $1,000." Well, hello, Danny. 104 00:04:23,719 --> 00:04:26,688 Hey, Dwight. Good to see you. Jim, hey. 105 00:04:26,756 --> 00:04:27,882 How are you? I'm good. 106 00:04:27,957 --> 00:04:29,322 What are you doing? 107 00:04:29,392 --> 00:04:30,723 Well, I'm just here for the coffee. 108 00:04:31,093 --> 00:04:33,027 Like hell you are. Dwight! 109 00:04:33,463 --> 00:04:35,158 He's not just here for the coffee, Jim. Wake up. 110 00:04:36,899 --> 00:04:39,060 Brainstorming session is now open. 111 00:04:39,135 --> 00:04:41,729 Anyone has an idea... Hold on. 112 00:04:41,804 --> 00:04:44,773 Sorry, sorry, sorry. Hello? 113 00:04:45,007 --> 00:04:47,976 Hey, it's Jim. Listen, this is important. Are you busy? 114 00:04:48,044 --> 00:04:49,636 Oh, hey. No, I'm not busy. What's up? 115 00:04:49,712 --> 00:04:51,441 You are busy! We're in a meeting! What? 116 00:04:51,514 --> 00:04:53,607 It's Jim, okay? Yes. 117 00:04:53,683 --> 00:04:54,809 Listen, you gotta get over here, 118 00:04:54,884 --> 00:04:55,976 'cause we're pitching Steve Nash 119 00:04:56,052 --> 00:04:57,383 and Danny Cordray's here. 120 00:04:57,687 --> 00:04:59,314 You need the big guns, yes? 121 00:04:59,422 --> 00:05:00,821 Yes. What'd he say? 122 00:05:00,890 --> 00:05:02,755 What did he say? The big gun thing. Stop. 123 00:05:02,859 --> 00:05:05,225 I will see you in 10. Bye! Hold tight. 124 00:05:07,697 --> 00:05:09,392 Well, I know a lot of you thought 125 00:05:09,465 --> 00:05:11,126 that my sales days were behind me. 126 00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:12,326 And, to be honest, so did I. 127 00:05:13,069 --> 00:05:15,367 And the only reason I got out of the sales game 128 00:05:15,438 --> 00:05:17,167 was to be reluctantly called back in. 129 00:05:17,540 --> 00:05:19,974 You don't look reluctant, Michael. You look really eager. 130 00:05:20,042 --> 00:05:23,671 No, I don't have time for this. Are you kidding me? 131 00:05:23,746 --> 00:05:26,078 You don't? No! Okay. All right. 132 00:05:28,684 --> 00:05:30,777 Knockity-knock, Don't knock back 133 00:05:30,853 --> 00:05:33,822 Just kidding, you can knock. It's your office. Do you have a minute? 134 00:05:34,223 --> 00:05:36,555 I'm very busy with time-sensitive work. 135 00:05:37,894 --> 00:05:39,521 Not to go all Sherlock Holmes on you, 136 00:05:39,595 --> 00:05:41,153 but I can tell by the reflection in your glasses 137 00:05:41,230 --> 00:05:43,562 that you're entering points into weightwatchers. Com. 138 00:05:43,799 --> 00:05:46,734 If you don't enter them immediately, you forget. 139 00:05:47,603 --> 00:05:48,592 What? 140 00:05:48,671 --> 00:05:51,834 I'm starting a band, and I need you on keyboards. 141 00:05:51,941 --> 00:05:53,101 Nah! 142 00:05:53,309 --> 00:05:54,401 I play for pleasure. 143 00:05:54,677 --> 00:05:55,871 This is for pleasure. 144 00:05:56,612 --> 00:05:57,636 Wouldn't enjoy that. 145 00:05:57,847 --> 00:05:58,871 I'm willing to pay you. 146 00:05:59,582 --> 00:06:00,640 Oh, yeah? Yeah. 147 00:06:00,716 --> 00:06:02,445 How much? 60 bucks a session. 148 00:06:02,518 --> 00:06:04,042 That's crazy money. 149 00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:05,109 I'll take 40. 150 00:06:05,187 --> 00:06:06,176 Yes! 151 00:06:07,590 --> 00:06:08,989 There he is. 152 00:06:10,293 --> 00:06:11,885 Oh, no, that's a male model. 153 00:06:11,961 --> 00:06:13,929 No, that's him. That... 154 00:06:15,398 --> 00:06:16,524 Hello. 155 00:06:17,700 --> 00:06:19,327 Michael Scott, Dunder Mifflin Paper Company. 156 00:06:19,402 --> 00:06:20,528 Danny Cordray, Osprey Paper. 157 00:06:20,603 --> 00:06:21,661 Nice to meet you. 158 00:06:22,371 --> 00:06:23,531 Three of you guys for one sale? 159 00:06:23,606 --> 00:06:26,074 Yeah, well... We call it overkill. 160 00:06:26,142 --> 00:06:28,076 Why am I telling you my strategy? 161 00:06:28,311 --> 00:06:30,370 Well, whatever works for you. 162 00:06:30,746 --> 00:06:31,940 Anyway, all right. All right. 163 00:06:32,014 --> 00:06:33,174 Good to see you guys. Nice to meet you. 164 00:06:33,249 --> 00:06:34,341 Goodbye. 165 00:06:34,417 --> 00:06:36,544 I could swear that guy was a male model. 166 00:06:36,619 --> 00:06:37,643 He's ready for you. 167 00:06:37,720 --> 00:06:38,709 Oh! Thank you. 168 00:06:38,788 --> 00:06:41,018 All right. On the count of three, it's show time. 169 00:06:41,123 --> 00:06:42,681 Ready, one, two... No, I'm not doing that. 170 00:06:42,792 --> 00:06:44,191 I've been in show time mode since breakfast. 171 00:06:44,260 --> 00:06:45,727 You're not? Okay, all right, just forget it then. 172 00:06:45,795 --> 00:06:47,660 Show time! It's show time! 173 00:06:47,730 --> 00:06:49,664 Never mind. Let's go. 174 00:06:49,732 --> 00:06:52,257 When I knock on your door, you know who it is. 175 00:06:52,335 --> 00:06:53,563 It's Michael Scott. 176 00:06:53,636 --> 00:06:55,297 We've been together forever, and... 177 00:06:55,371 --> 00:06:57,362 Michael, I appreciate everything 178 00:06:57,440 --> 00:06:59,499 that Dunder Mifflin has done for this company. 179 00:06:59,575 --> 00:07:02,408 You know what? You are having some problems with your loading dock. 180 00:07:02,478 --> 00:07:06,312 Are you not? All right, we're going to deliver to you on weekends. 181 00:07:06,682 --> 00:07:07,910 That's very generous, but... 182 00:07:07,984 --> 00:07:09,849 And you know what else we're gonna do? 183 00:07:09,919 --> 00:07:11,216 I can't believe I'm gonna say this. 184 00:07:11,287 --> 00:07:14,017 We are going to offer you our paper at cost. 185 00:07:14,090 --> 00:07:15,182 I know. 186 00:07:15,558 --> 00:07:16,889 I could get in a lot of trouble for this, 187 00:07:16,959 --> 00:07:17,948 so you'd better shake my hand right now. 188 00:07:18,027 --> 00:07:19,016 He's not kidding. 189 00:07:19,095 --> 00:07:20,084 Shake it, shake it! 190 00:07:20,162 --> 00:07:21,254 Michael, I'm going with Danny. 191 00:07:21,530 --> 00:07:22,519 Oh. 192 00:07:23,065 --> 00:07:24,089 Thanks for coming in. 193 00:07:24,367 --> 00:07:25,834 Okay. Thank you. 194 00:07:25,901 --> 00:07:27,061 Thank you. 195 00:07:28,871 --> 00:07:30,805 Jim talked too much. No, I didn't. 196 00:07:30,873 --> 00:07:32,704 Yes, you did. Stop it. Just stop it. 197 00:07:32,775 --> 00:07:36,074 We did what we should have done. We just got bested. 198 00:07:37,847 --> 00:07:39,075 Why is there a door close button 199 00:07:39,148 --> 00:07:40,479 if it doesn't even close the door? 200 00:07:41,984 --> 00:07:44,452 How do I feel about losing the sale? 201 00:07:44,520 --> 00:07:48,149 It's like if Michael Phelps came out of retirement, 202 00:07:48,224 --> 00:07:51,557 jumped in the pool, belly-flopped and drowned. 203 00:07:52,028 --> 00:07:54,223 You know who we always lose out to? 204 00:07:54,296 --> 00:07:56,628 Staples, the big guys... 205 00:07:56,966 --> 00:08:00,493 Osprey? They're a small company. They're smaller than we are. 206 00:08:00,569 --> 00:08:03,402 What's our excuse? How do we combat this guy? 207 00:08:03,739 --> 00:08:04,933 Stanley, how do we combat him? 208 00:08:05,007 --> 00:08:06,065 We sell better? 209 00:08:06,175 --> 00:08:07,904 Okay. You know what? 210 00:08:07,977 --> 00:08:10,810 You clearly don't care, so why don't you just leave? 211 00:08:11,013 --> 00:08:13,004 I would like to stay. This pertains to me. 212 00:08:13,082 --> 00:08:14,879 Why don't you go outside 213 00:08:14,950 --> 00:08:17,418 and take a shot of insulin and have a nap, okay? 214 00:08:17,486 --> 00:08:19,420 Why do you always assume I have diabetes? 215 00:08:19,488 --> 00:08:21,183 I don't know. Your frame, your build. 216 00:08:21,257 --> 00:08:22,622 Why don't you have a glass of apple juice 217 00:08:22,692 --> 00:08:24,990 and tell me you're not a diabetic? 218 00:08:25,061 --> 00:08:26,926 See? I could tell by the sound you made 219 00:08:26,996 --> 00:08:28,361 when you stood up that you have... 220 00:08:28,431 --> 00:08:29,830 Okay. Yes, Phyllis? 221 00:08:29,899 --> 00:08:31,025 I could try to seduce him. 222 00:08:31,100 --> 00:08:32,465 Oh, my God! 223 00:08:32,535 --> 00:08:34,935 I know how we can learn his tricks. 224 00:08:35,237 --> 00:08:38,729 What I'm about to show you is of the utmost secrecy. 225 00:08:39,909 --> 00:08:40,898 Is that your office? 226 00:08:40,976 --> 00:08:41,965 Yes, Jim. 227 00:08:42,044 --> 00:08:44,308 And with a little tweaking, it becomes a different office. 228 00:08:44,380 --> 00:08:47,679 We lure Danny to it and watch him sell. Oh. 229 00:08:47,750 --> 00:08:49,445 I'm out of here. This is weird. 230 00:08:49,518 --> 00:08:51,577 You know what this is? This is a stinger. 231 00:08:51,654 --> 00:08:53,121 A what? 232 00:08:53,189 --> 00:08:54,281 Like the movie. 233 00:08:54,356 --> 00:08:56,221 I think you mean The Sting. 234 00:08:56,292 --> 00:08:58,055 Paul Newman, Robert Redford. They're bank robbers? 235 00:08:58,127 --> 00:08:59,321 Nope. Different movie. It's called The Stinger. 236 00:08:59,395 --> 00:09:00,726 The Sting. 237 00:09:06,068 --> 00:09:07,399 Your 2:00. 238 00:09:07,703 --> 00:09:08,727 Thanks, hon. 239 00:09:09,438 --> 00:09:10,996 Meredith was the perfect choice 240 00:09:11,073 --> 00:09:13,166 to play the head of the company. 241 00:09:13,242 --> 00:09:15,267 Her lunch break lined up with our appointment with Danny, 242 00:09:15,344 --> 00:09:17,642 and... That's it. 243 00:09:17,713 --> 00:09:19,681 That's really all we were looking for. 244 00:09:19,815 --> 00:09:21,373 Danny Cordray. It's great to meet you. 245 00:09:21,450 --> 00:09:22,917 Meredith Van Helsing. Pleased to meet you. 246 00:09:22,985 --> 00:09:24,646 Meredith Van Helsing? 247 00:09:24,720 --> 00:09:26,278 Van Helsing was a respected professor 248 00:09:26,355 --> 00:09:27,686 before he was a vampire killer. 249 00:09:27,757 --> 00:09:29,725 Okay. But what is he more famous for? Shh. 250 00:09:32,094 --> 00:09:33,618 Hey! That's my mug. 251 00:09:33,696 --> 00:09:35,095 You know this isn't real TV, right? 252 00:09:35,164 --> 00:09:36,597 Yes. 253 00:09:37,333 --> 00:09:40,029 Please, Mr. President 254 00:09:40,102 --> 00:09:43,094 If you wanna Give hope a whirl 255 00:09:43,172 --> 00:09:45,936 Bring our troops Home safe and sound 256 00:09:46,008 --> 00:09:48,067 Says this little girl 257 00:09:49,645 --> 00:09:51,613 Please, Mr. President 258 00:09:51,847 --> 00:09:53,474 Wait a second, wait a second, wait a second. 259 00:09:53,549 --> 00:09:56,541 So, the song is from the point of view of a little girl? 260 00:09:56,719 --> 00:09:58,209 Yeah. But you're singing it. 261 00:09:58,287 --> 00:09:59,777 Yeah. But I'm using my falsetto. 262 00:09:59,989 --> 00:10:02,549 No, that's not a good idea. I don't see it as a very good song. 263 00:10:02,625 --> 00:10:04,354 Yeah, well, it'd sound a lot better 264 00:10:04,426 --> 00:10:06,121 if you actually sang with some soul. 265 00:10:06,495 --> 00:10:08,190 I never sing with soul. That's a lie. 266 00:10:08,297 --> 00:10:09,389 I could sing it. 267 00:10:09,632 --> 00:10:11,725 I just was hoping to maybe save your voice 268 00:10:11,801 --> 00:10:13,792 in case we did a novelty song about frogs. 269 00:10:14,103 --> 00:10:17,072 But my voice is unique. Like Bob Dylan. 270 00:10:17,439 --> 00:10:18,599 Okay, three-way argument 271 00:10:18,674 --> 00:10:20,403 between a drummer, a keyboardist, 272 00:10:20,476 --> 00:10:22,137 and the front man, lead singer. 273 00:10:22,778 --> 00:10:24,746 Wonder who's gonna win this one. 274 00:10:25,381 --> 00:10:27,042 Two, three, four... 275 00:10:27,249 --> 00:10:29,183 I'm gonna take off my coat, if you don't mind. 276 00:10:29,552 --> 00:10:31,520 It's just a bit warm in here. 277 00:10:34,089 --> 00:10:35,522 Hello! 278 00:10:35,591 --> 00:10:37,081 No, no, no. Don't. 279 00:10:37,159 --> 00:10:39,150 People can't keep their true natures hidden for long, 280 00:10:39,228 --> 00:10:40,991 and this guy is smoldering like a tire fire. 281 00:10:41,063 --> 00:10:42,087 Testify. 282 00:10:42,164 --> 00:10:43,461 Okay, he's not that good-looking. 283 00:10:43,532 --> 00:10:44,624 I don't understand why everybody's... 284 00:10:44,700 --> 00:10:46,031 Yeah, he is that good-looking. Okay? 285 00:10:46,101 --> 00:10:47,363 He's very, very handsome. 286 00:10:47,436 --> 00:10:49,836 That's a great set of shoulders you got there. 287 00:10:49,905 --> 00:10:52,169 What is that, genetics? 288 00:10:52,241 --> 00:10:53,299 Creatine? 289 00:10:54,476 --> 00:10:55,534 Sorry. 290 00:10:55,911 --> 00:10:58,277 Yeah. Pull it together, all right? 291 00:10:58,347 --> 00:11:00,144 Stop looking at him. 292 00:11:00,216 --> 00:11:01,547 I'm sorry. 293 00:11:04,119 --> 00:11:05,381 You're here to sell me some paper. 294 00:11:05,454 --> 00:11:09,515 Well, actually, no, Miss Van Helsing, that's not why I'm here. 295 00:11:09,592 --> 00:11:13,426 I'm here to meet you, see if we'd be a, you know, good fit. 296 00:11:13,529 --> 00:11:14,587 What do you mean? 297 00:11:14,663 --> 00:11:18,224 Oh, my God! He's making her sell to him. 298 00:11:18,701 --> 00:11:21,499 Bring our troops Home safe and sound 299 00:11:21,570 --> 00:11:23,629 Says this little girl 300 00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:26,635 Okay. Honest feedback time. Oscar. 301 00:11:26,842 --> 00:11:30,039 That's pandering. And it makes me think you think I'm stupid. 302 00:11:30,179 --> 00:11:32,147 But do you think it could be famous? 303 00:11:32,214 --> 00:11:33,613 Like in a car commercial or something? 304 00:11:33,816 --> 00:11:35,147 Not really. 305 00:11:35,217 --> 00:11:37,310 It's kind of weird that a grown man is singing 306 00:11:37,386 --> 00:11:39,445 from the point of view of a little girl. Mmm-hmm. 307 00:11:39,521 --> 00:11:42,012 I feel like I can see someone ice skating to it, 308 00:11:42,091 --> 00:11:43,922 you know, like in the Olympics. 309 00:11:43,993 --> 00:11:48,589 I don't think they usually skate to such bad songs. 310 00:11:49,298 --> 00:11:51,528 Rude. And not helpful. 311 00:11:51,600 --> 00:11:53,534 Well, I really, really, really liked it. 312 00:11:54,003 --> 00:11:56,471 Well, that really bums me out. 313 00:11:57,640 --> 00:11:58,766 You're welcome. 314 00:11:58,874 --> 00:12:01,604 Well, you should think of this as a first date. 315 00:12:01,677 --> 00:12:03,941 And I think it's going very well. How about you? 316 00:12:04,179 --> 00:12:05,476 Real well. 317 00:12:05,547 --> 00:12:06,536 Uh... 318 00:12:06,682 --> 00:12:08,843 Feels more like a third date to me. 319 00:12:08,918 --> 00:12:10,579 There you go! 320 00:12:12,087 --> 00:12:13,486 Stay... Shut up and let me do this! 321 00:12:15,324 --> 00:12:18,816 You know, what is with this desk keeping us so far apart? 322 00:12:18,894 --> 00:12:20,691 I've never been a desk man. 323 00:12:20,763 --> 00:12:24,426 Always traveling on the road. Come on... Why not? Uh? 324 00:12:25,534 --> 00:12:26,899 Well, we'll get this... 325 00:12:29,672 --> 00:12:32,140 Oh, man. So, what's your drink? 326 00:12:32,508 --> 00:12:34,772 You a vodka man? Me, too. 327 00:12:35,411 --> 00:12:37,106 We gotta get someone else in there right now. 328 00:12:37,179 --> 00:12:39,079 You're an exec at Pennsylvania Solartech. 329 00:12:39,148 --> 00:12:40,274 That sounds fake. 330 00:12:40,349 --> 00:12:41,373 What do you mean? I told you. 331 00:12:41,450 --> 00:12:43,281 You're an exec at Stark Industries, 332 00:12:43,352 --> 00:12:44,785 a corporation you inherited from your father. 333 00:12:44,853 --> 00:12:46,252 Will you stop? Here's the story. 334 00:12:46,322 --> 00:12:48,051 They need Meredith somewhere else ASAP: okay? 335 00:12:48,123 --> 00:12:49,181 Okay. So you're taking over. 336 00:12:49,258 --> 00:12:50,953 You just gotta get her out of there as soon as you can. 337 00:12:51,026 --> 00:12:52,584 I can do that. Then what? 338 00:12:52,661 --> 00:12:53,753 Then make him pitch to you. 339 00:12:53,829 --> 00:12:54,887 You gotta see what he's got. Yes. 340 00:12:54,964 --> 00:12:56,363 Exactly. You can do this. Okay, and remember. 341 00:12:56,432 --> 00:12:57,626 You're not gay. 342 00:12:57,700 --> 00:12:58,860 Stop it. It's gonna be great. 343 00:12:58,934 --> 00:13:01,869 Listen, if anything else happens, just roll with it. 344 00:13:04,239 --> 00:13:05,228 Meredith, I... 345 00:13:05,307 --> 00:13:06,296 Manuel. 346 00:13:06,375 --> 00:13:09,936 This is Manuel, my cleaning man. He doesn't speak any English. 347 00:13:15,250 --> 00:13:17,582 Manuel, cleano el window. 348 00:13:17,853 --> 00:13:18,877 Give me the... 349 00:13:18,954 --> 00:13:19,943 Who else we got? 350 00:13:22,257 --> 00:13:25,090 Okay. You're a young hotshot from Stark Industries. 351 00:13:25,160 --> 00:13:27,185 You've just bought this company. Meredith is fired. 352 00:13:27,262 --> 00:13:29,696 It's a whole new regime. He's gotta pitch to you now. 353 00:13:29,765 --> 00:13:31,699 Okay, Stark Industries isn't real. 354 00:13:31,767 --> 00:13:32,927 I run Google. 355 00:13:33,002 --> 00:13:34,731 Larry and Sergey brought me... Great. Sounds awesome. 356 00:13:34,803 --> 00:13:36,498 Just have him pitch to you. Don't let us down. 357 00:13:36,772 --> 00:13:38,137 Will do. Won't do. 358 00:13:38,340 --> 00:13:39,568 Yeah, sure. 359 00:13:39,641 --> 00:13:40,972 You smell like a Scorpio. 360 00:13:41,210 --> 00:13:44,202 This is Esteban, another cleaning man. 361 00:13:44,279 --> 00:13:46,577 He doesn't speak English either. 362 00:13:46,648 --> 00:13:48,616 Esteban, el flooro. 363 00:13:56,091 --> 00:13:58,753 You know what? I may have parked my car in a compact space, 364 00:13:58,827 --> 00:14:00,454 and I hate when I see others do that, so... 365 00:14:00,529 --> 00:14:02,121 Danny, I feel a real connection to you, 366 00:14:02,197 --> 00:14:03,425 and I got to get real. 367 00:14:03,499 --> 00:14:04,488 No. No, no, no. 368 00:14:04,566 --> 00:14:05,555 No, no, no, no, no! 369 00:14:05,634 --> 00:14:06,794 I'm going in! I'm going in! Michael! 370 00:14:06,869 --> 00:14:08,302 No, Michael, stop it! No! 371 00:14:08,370 --> 00:14:09,837 Stop, stop! Oh, my God! 372 00:14:09,905 --> 00:14:12,430 Okay. Stop it, stop it, stop it. 373 00:14:12,508 --> 00:14:15,102 Gross! Stop it, please. Everybody stop. 374 00:14:15,711 --> 00:14:16,700 Michael Scott. 375 00:14:16,779 --> 00:14:17,837 I said stop. 376 00:14:19,648 --> 00:14:20,910 Okay, Danny, 377 00:14:21,550 --> 00:14:22,881 this is not Pennsylvania Solartech. 378 00:14:22,951 --> 00:14:24,976 This is Dunder Mifflin Paper Company. 379 00:14:25,054 --> 00:14:26,385 This is Meredith Palmer. 380 00:14:26,488 --> 00:14:27,978 Pleased to meet you. Don't... Stay away from him. 381 00:14:28,057 --> 00:14:30,685 Please, just leave. Get out of here. Go. Forever. 382 00:14:30,926 --> 00:14:31,950 Hmm. 383 00:14:32,027 --> 00:14:35,258 I owe you a most sincere and humble apology. 384 00:14:35,364 --> 00:14:38,333 We were trying to watch you to see your sales technique 385 00:14:38,400 --> 00:14:40,334 so we could stop losing so many clients to you. 386 00:14:40,702 --> 00:14:41,896 Watch from where? 387 00:14:41,970 --> 00:14:43,494 A surveillance room next to this one. 388 00:14:43,572 --> 00:14:46,507 Okay, so you set up this fake company, 389 00:14:46,575 --> 00:14:49,806 then you hired this homeless woman to impersonate an executive, 390 00:14:50,245 --> 00:14:53,646 to spy on me so that you could copy my sales technique. 391 00:14:53,882 --> 00:14:55,713 Yes. And it's the sincerest form of flattery. 392 00:14:56,318 --> 00:14:57,342 Or crazy. 393 00:14:57,619 --> 00:14:58,779 Well... I'm gonna go. 394 00:14:58,854 --> 00:15:00,947 Okay. You know what, it wasn't just me. 395 00:15:01,223 --> 00:15:03,282 Jim and Dwight are behind that wall 396 00:15:03,559 --> 00:15:05,959 in the surveillance room, and it was their plan, as well. 397 00:15:06,028 --> 00:15:07,222 No! No, no, no, no. 398 00:15:07,496 --> 00:15:08,724 Well, then, yeah. All right, hey! 399 00:15:09,298 --> 00:15:10,731 Good luck, guys! 400 00:15:10,833 --> 00:15:12,232 Seems like you got a great operation here. 401 00:15:12,301 --> 00:15:14,792 No, we don't. Here's... Here's my point. 402 00:15:15,170 --> 00:15:18,230 Danny, listen, you have to understand 403 00:15:18,307 --> 00:15:20,036 that we are not normally like this. 404 00:15:20,109 --> 00:15:22,839 We just... We wanted to know your tricks. 405 00:15:22,911 --> 00:15:24,708 What do you mean, tricks? There's no tricks, man. 406 00:15:24,780 --> 00:15:27,305 I'm just a good salesman. You wanna copy that? You can't copy that! 407 00:15:27,382 --> 00:15:30,840 You are, you are. You are! Stop it, stop it. Stop. 408 00:15:30,919 --> 00:15:31,977 You are a good salesman. 409 00:15:32,588 --> 00:15:34,453 And because of that 410 00:15:35,591 --> 00:15:36,785 I want you to work for me. 411 00:15:36,859 --> 00:15:38,759 Sure. You seem like a fun, professional guy. 412 00:15:39,061 --> 00:15:40,085 So you will. No! 413 00:15:40,162 --> 00:15:41,720 Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold on. 414 00:15:41,797 --> 00:15:44,766 Hold on. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait. 415 00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:47,430 Danny, I want you to look at me. 416 00:15:47,536 --> 00:15:50,061 Do you want your life to be better 417 00:15:50,139 --> 00:15:51,800 or to be worse or to stay the same? 418 00:15:52,141 --> 00:15:53,608 Get out of my way. Answer the question. 419 00:15:53,675 --> 00:15:55,142 Do you want a better life, Danny? 420 00:15:55,210 --> 00:15:57,007 I swear to God, I'm gonna hit you. 421 00:15:58,580 --> 00:16:00,844 I didn't mean that. I'm sorry. I'm not... 422 00:16:00,916 --> 00:16:02,247 It's just, I'm very upset right now. I know. 423 00:16:02,317 --> 00:16:03,375 I'm very upset! I know, I know. 424 00:16:03,452 --> 00:16:06,944 Do you want more freedom, less freedom, or to stay the same? 425 00:16:08,157 --> 00:16:10,751 More freedom. I can give you more money. 426 00:16:11,093 --> 00:16:12,526 There's your better life. 427 00:16:12,594 --> 00:16:14,755 I can let you come and go as you please. 428 00:16:14,830 --> 00:16:16,559 There's your freedom. 429 00:16:16,632 --> 00:16:18,031 And you already know Dunder Mifflin 430 00:16:18,100 --> 00:16:20,261 has the best service and the best prices. 431 00:16:20,335 --> 00:16:22,326 But you beat us anyway. 432 00:16:22,404 --> 00:16:26,500 Can you imagine how well you would do selling our stuff? 433 00:16:30,412 --> 00:16:32,380 Everyone, may I have your attention? 434 00:16:32,447 --> 00:16:35,610 I would like to introduce you to Mr. Danny Cordray. 435 00:16:35,951 --> 00:16:39,819 He's going to be joining us as our new traveling salesman. 436 00:16:40,022 --> 00:16:41,387 Say hello to Danny! 437 00:16:42,057 --> 00:16:43,183 Me. 438 00:16:43,258 --> 00:16:45,089 Okay. You know what? 439 00:16:45,160 --> 00:16:47,060 No. No. 440 00:16:47,129 --> 00:16:50,758 This is not some sort of construction site, or all of Italy 441 00:16:50,832 --> 00:16:52,925 where you can just go around treating people like meat. 442 00:16:53,202 --> 00:16:54,601 We are to respect him. 443 00:16:55,103 --> 00:16:58,971 I respect him because he reminds me of somebody. 444 00:16:59,041 --> 00:17:00,269 Can anybody guess who that is? 445 00:17:00,609 --> 00:17:01,598 Josh Duhamel. 446 00:17:01,677 --> 00:17:02,735 Yeah, I can see that! 447 00:17:02,844 --> 00:17:05,472 No. No. No. Somebody in this office. 448 00:17:05,581 --> 00:17:07,640 He's like a better-looking Andy. 449 00:17:07,916 --> 00:17:08,940 Thanks, Kevin. 450 00:17:09,017 --> 00:17:10,814 No. Me. Right? 451 00:17:12,020 --> 00:17:14,215 Sort of like a little, younger version of me. 452 00:17:14,690 --> 00:17:16,817 It's hard to judge ourselves accurately, isn't it? 453 00:17:16,892 --> 00:17:17,950 Michael. Yes. 454 00:17:18,026 --> 00:17:19,687 Can I talk to you about something? No, you may not. 455 00:17:19,761 --> 00:17:21,319 It's about this very announcement you just made. 456 00:17:21,396 --> 00:17:23,023 I said no. Michael... 457 00:17:23,098 --> 00:17:24,429 Michael, I think you really want to talk to him. 458 00:17:24,499 --> 00:17:27,195 Okay, let's... All right, all right. Let's talk. 459 00:17:27,269 --> 00:17:28,361 Please don't let him leave. Don't leave. 460 00:17:28,437 --> 00:17:29,461 Got you. 461 00:17:29,538 --> 00:17:30,903 You hired him? 462 00:17:30,973 --> 00:17:31,997 Guys, let me ask you something. 463 00:17:32,074 --> 00:17:34,804 Do you want your life to be better or worse or stay the same? 464 00:17:34,876 --> 00:17:36,002 Stay the same. 465 00:17:36,078 --> 00:17:38,979 Okay. Well, get ready, 'cause it's gonna get better. 466 00:17:39,314 --> 00:17:41,874 It's not gonna get better. He's gonna steal all of our clients. 467 00:17:41,950 --> 00:17:43,440 No. No. Wrong. 468 00:17:43,518 --> 00:17:45,247 He would have stolen your clients, 469 00:17:45,320 --> 00:17:47,015 but you know what? He can't now. 470 00:17:47,089 --> 00:17:49,114 This guy used to steal sales from us. 471 00:17:49,258 --> 00:17:51,317 Now he's going to steal sales for us. 472 00:17:51,593 --> 00:17:53,458 Where's he gonna sit? There's no more seats. 473 00:17:53,528 --> 00:17:55,189 He doesn't need to sit. He's a traveling salesman. 474 00:17:55,264 --> 00:17:58,131 Look, I am not going to exclude good people from our staff 475 00:17:58,200 --> 00:18:00,395 simply because they are threatening to you. 476 00:18:00,869 --> 00:18:02,268 And unless you have a better argument than that, 477 00:18:02,337 --> 00:18:03,668 I suggest you leave. 478 00:18:04,339 --> 00:18:05,328 Yeah. 479 00:18:05,941 --> 00:18:08,535 Where's he gonna park? There's no more reserved parking spots. 480 00:18:08,610 --> 00:18:09,838 Goodbye! 481 00:18:13,949 --> 00:18:15,780 Songs about truth. Yeah. 482 00:18:15,851 --> 00:18:17,580 What's something you really care about? 483 00:18:18,687 --> 00:18:19,813 Reverse snobbery. 484 00:18:19,988 --> 00:18:21,046 More universal. 485 00:18:21,323 --> 00:18:23,951 Sometimes I feel like life has passed me by. 486 00:18:25,794 --> 00:18:29,195 Couldn't get Out of bed today 487 00:18:29,798 --> 00:18:31,993 Wish the alarm clock Would go away 488 00:18:32,067 --> 00:18:33,091 Nice! 489 00:18:33,168 --> 00:18:34,533 Holy crap. Are you kidding me? 490 00:18:34,603 --> 00:18:35,968 You just made that... That's amazing. 491 00:18:36,038 --> 00:18:37,096 Go ahead. 492 00:18:37,239 --> 00:18:39,571 Which me am I Gonna be today? 493 00:18:39,641 --> 00:18:41,939 Which me am I Gonna be today? 494 00:18:42,010 --> 00:18:44,376 I got a closet full of mes Ha ha! 495 00:18:45,447 --> 00:18:48,348 Am I gonna be the happy me? 496 00:18:48,784 --> 00:18:50,843 Or the me that stinks? 497 00:18:51,253 --> 00:18:53,744 Oh, my gosh. We're almost out of time. 498 00:18:53,822 --> 00:18:55,187 How much for another half hour? 499 00:18:55,357 --> 00:18:57,154 Don't worry about it. 500 00:18:58,026 --> 00:19:00,153 Wait. Seriously? Yeah. 501 00:19:00,996 --> 00:19:02,861 So we're just, like, jamming as friends? 502 00:19:03,198 --> 00:19:05,530 One, two, three, hit it. 503 00:19:05,867 --> 00:19:07,732 Closet full of mes... 504 00:19:07,869 --> 00:19:12,169 Oh, you know, funny, your wife and I went on a few dates. 505 00:19:13,041 --> 00:19:14,804 Did you? Yeah, way, way, way back. 506 00:19:14,876 --> 00:19:16,207 I'm just kidding. She told me about it. 507 00:19:16,278 --> 00:19:18,803 Good. She was not into me. 508 00:19:18,880 --> 00:19:20,279 Oh. Obviously. 509 00:19:20,449 --> 00:19:21,746 I don't even think she called me back. 510 00:19:22,050 --> 00:19:23,984 You snubbed her. Dwight, please. 511 00:19:24,052 --> 00:19:27,715 Let me handle this, Jim. Drop the act, Cordray. Okay? 512 00:19:27,789 --> 00:19:29,381 We all know that you probably thought 513 00:19:29,458 --> 00:19:32,894 that Pam was too "meh" or thin without being toned. 514 00:19:33,195 --> 00:19:34,253 But I wanna tell you something. 515 00:19:34,329 --> 00:19:36,695 She is one of the plain, hearty women of Scranton 516 00:19:36,765 --> 00:19:38,630 that make this city great. 517 00:19:38,700 --> 00:19:40,327 And so what if she doesn't wear makeup? 518 00:19:40,402 --> 00:19:41,596 I wear makeup. 519 00:19:41,670 --> 00:19:44,070 We like her better that way! And you steal clients, don't you? 520 00:19:44,506 --> 00:19:45,598 Don't you? 521 00:19:45,707 --> 00:19:47,299 Okay, that's different. 522 00:19:47,376 --> 00:19:48,900 "That's different," is it? 523 00:19:48,977 --> 00:19:51,036 Okay, thief. 524 00:19:51,113 --> 00:19:54,139 You better check your things, people. In fact, where are my keys? 525 00:19:54,649 --> 00:19:58,085 Oh. They're in my pocket. False alarm. 526 00:19:59,054 --> 00:20:00,146 Okay. 527 00:20:02,858 --> 00:20:04,849 So you're gonna be working here. 528 00:20:05,827 --> 00:20:06,816 Uh... 529 00:20:07,462 --> 00:20:08,588 I mean... Yeah. 530 00:20:08,964 --> 00:20:10,488 Welcome aboard. 531 00:20:12,801 --> 00:20:14,496 Thank you. 532 00:20:14,569 --> 00:20:16,730 Hey, crazy. Um... 533 00:20:16,805 --> 00:20:19,706 So, that's it? You're just... You're fine? 534 00:20:19,841 --> 00:20:23,106 It's after 5:00, Jim. I'm not gonna take this home. 535 00:20:24,746 --> 00:20:25,770 Pleasure. 536 00:20:26,181 --> 00:20:27,341 Thanks. 537 00:20:27,416 --> 00:20:30,442 This morning, Danny Cordray stole a sale from me. So what do I do? 538 00:20:30,685 --> 00:20:32,676 I go out and I steal Danny Cordray. 539 00:20:32,754 --> 00:20:35,917 The sale that mattered, I made. Boom. 540 00:20:35,991 --> 00:20:37,424 Funny thing about it, we don't even need him. 541 00:20:37,492 --> 00:20:39,687 We already have Packer on the road. 542 00:20:40,929 --> 00:20:43,056 Crap. I forgot about Packer. 543 00:20:47,502 --> 00:20:49,800 Star's in her eyes, tongue full of flies 544 00:20:49,871 --> 00:20:52,704 Would you like to share my pad? 545 00:20:52,774 --> 00:20:56,540 Croak, croak, croak, Bullfrog in love 546 00:20:57,512 --> 00:21:00,106 Croak, croak, croak, Bullfrog in love 547 00:21:00,182 --> 00:21:01,308 And I gave her the croak 548 00:21:01,383 --> 00:21:02,873 That meant I love you 549 00:21:03,485 --> 00:21:06,010 I'll be your croak monsieur 550 00:21:06,087 --> 00:21:08,453 I'll be your croak madame 551 00:21:08,523 --> 00:21:10,684 Your mama might've said That bullfrogs are dogs 552 00:21:10,759 --> 00:21:13,353 But I'm here to Tell you that I'm a frog 553 00:21:13,428 --> 00:21:16,454 Come and sit on my log, You little pollywog 554 00:21:16,531 --> 00:21:18,829 I find you absolutely ribbitting! 555 00:21:18,900 --> 00:21:21,528 Croak, croak, croak, Bullfrog in love 556 00:21:21,603 --> 00:21:24,197 Croak, croak, croak, Bullfrog in love 557 00:21:24,272 --> 00:21:25,500 Croak Ribbit 558 00:21:25,574 --> 00:21:27,804 Scoopty splash 559 00:21:27,876 --> 00:21:29,138 Nice. 560 00:21:30,195 --> 00:21:40,195 Someone needs to stop Clearway Law. Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.