1 00:00:01,970 --> 00:00:03,972 Andy's coming back today. 2 00:00:06,330 --> 00:00:07,695 Andy's coming back today. 3 00:00:10,210 --> 00:00:11,655 Andy's coming back today. 4 00:00:11,730 --> 00:00:15,098 David Wallace sent him on an Outward Bound wilderness adventure 5 00:00:15,170 --> 00:00:18,219 for a whole month to make him more decisive and confident. 6 00:00:18,290 --> 00:00:19,780 He sent his own son, too, 7 00:00:19,850 --> 00:00:22,740 and the counselor said they both grew up, big time. 8 00:00:26,690 --> 00:00:29,375 How was my summer? It was pretty mixed. 9 00:00:29,450 --> 00:00:32,533 I invented a new power drink made out of beet runoff. 10 00:00:32,650 --> 00:00:34,379 Mmm. Mmm! 11 00:00:35,210 --> 00:00:37,053 So that's really good. 12 00:00:37,130 --> 00:00:38,973 But I got some disappointing medical news. 13 00:00:41,890 --> 00:00:44,257 Mr. Schrute, the results are in. You're not the father. 14 00:00:44,330 --> 00:00:46,856 I told you. God. 15 00:00:48,250 --> 00:00:49,900 On! 16 00:00:49,970 --> 00:00:51,381 Oh, my God! 17 00:00:51,530 --> 00:00:56,092 Oh! What a summer! An emotional roller coaster. 18 00:00:56,650 --> 00:00:58,891 I ran over a turtle in the parking lot. 19 00:01:00,530 --> 00:01:04,740 But then I saved him by gluing his shell back together. 20 00:01:05,650 --> 00:01:07,812 But I'm not that good at puzzles. 21 00:01:07,890 --> 00:01:09,460 That piece doesn't go there. 22 00:01:09,570 --> 00:01:10,810 Shh. 23 00:01:10,930 --> 00:01:13,581 So I patched him with stuff from around the office, 24 00:01:15,170 --> 00:01:18,219 but I couldn't get the pieces to fit right. 25 00:01:18,330 --> 00:01:21,652 Then one day, while I was reaching for the glue, 26 00:01:23,770 --> 00:01:25,818 I crushed his shell again. 27 00:01:26,130 --> 00:01:29,339 But I rebuilt him even better that time. 28 00:01:29,770 --> 00:01:34,571 But it turned out the turtle was already dead. 29 00:01:35,970 --> 00:01:39,452 Probably when I ran over him the first time. 30 00:01:40,490 --> 00:01:41,935 For us? Um... 31 00:01:43,170 --> 00:01:45,013 Nothing new, really. The kids are great. 32 00:01:45,130 --> 00:01:47,053 You are really good at modesty. She's a genius. 33 00:01:47,130 --> 00:01:49,371 She painted this incredible mural in the kids' room. 34 00:01:49,490 --> 00:01:50,980 There's a hippo leading a parade... Okay. 35 00:01:51,050 --> 00:01:52,131 of 500 children through the village. 36 00:01:52,210 --> 00:01:53,621 Well, you had that interesting thing. 37 00:01:54,010 --> 00:01:55,375 Oh! Yeah. 38 00:01:55,450 --> 00:01:57,737 Yes, Jim's friend is starting a new company 39 00:01:57,850 --> 00:01:59,261 based on this idea that Jim had 40 00:01:59,370 --> 00:02:00,781 when they were back in college. 41 00:02:00,850 --> 00:02:04,059 It's sports marketing, basically, but the athletes are partners. 42 00:02:04,130 --> 00:02:05,734 And he wanted Jim to be a partner, too. 43 00:02:05,810 --> 00:02:09,610 In Philly, so that doesn't really work for the family. 44 00:02:10,250 --> 00:02:13,459 But watch this guy make a billion dollars off my idea. 45 00:02:13,530 --> 00:02:15,612 He said if it takes off, he's going to buy us a new car. 46 00:02:15,690 --> 00:02:17,499 An Altima or better. 47 00:02:18,530 --> 00:02:20,419 Kelly Kapoor is gone. 48 00:02:20,490 --> 00:02:23,414 Her fiancé, Ravi, was hired as a pediatrics professor 49 00:02:23,650 --> 00:02:25,140 at Miami University. 50 00:02:25,210 --> 00:02:26,621 I don't need 'em anymore. 51 00:02:26,690 --> 00:02:29,296 I am going to Miami, biyatches, 52 00:02:29,370 --> 00:02:32,658 to hang with LeBron James and Gloria Estefan! 53 00:02:33,170 --> 00:02:35,821 Miami University, in Ohio. 54 00:02:36,450 --> 00:02:39,374 On her last day, Kelly was still a little confused about it. 55 00:02:39,650 --> 00:02:40,890 Enjoy the snow, losers! 56 00:02:40,970 --> 00:02:42,654 I'm so happy for you, Kelly. 57 00:02:44,330 --> 00:02:46,776 Shortly after Kelly left, Ryan quit 58 00:02:47,010 --> 00:02:49,092 and also moved to Ohio, 59 00:02:49,330 --> 00:02:51,219 for what he claimed were unrelated reasons. 60 00:02:51,530 --> 00:02:54,215 I've actually done a lot of market research, and it turns out 61 00:02:54,290 --> 00:02:57,134 that Southwestern Ohio is going to be the next Silicon Valley. 62 00:02:57,210 --> 00:02:59,258 They call it the Silicon Prairie. 63 00:02:59,370 --> 00:03:02,579 It's a big university town and, uhH. 64 00:03:04,650 --> 00:03:06,573 This is not garbage. It's my clothes. 65 00:03:07,130 --> 00:03:09,098 And that was our summer. 66 00:03:11,690 --> 00:03:13,818 - We good? - Yeah, thanks. 67 00:03:15,170 --> 00:03:16,934 Don't you guys have everything? I mean, 68 00:03:17,050 --> 00:03:18,893 it's just a paper company- 69 00:03:19,650 --> 00:03:23,018 Well, we're more following you guys, to see how you turn out. 70 00:03:23,090 --> 00:03:26,731 Oh! Yeah, I guess we were kind of dramatic in the beginning. 71 00:03:26,810 --> 00:03:28,300 Well. 72 00:03:28,370 --> 00:03:30,896 I don't think anything's going to change in our lives now. 73 00:03:30,970 --> 00:03:32,381 With work and two kids, 74 00:03:32,450 --> 00:03:37,058 I guess nothing interesting is going to happen to us for along, long time. 75 00:03:38,090 --> 00:03:44,164 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 76 00:04:04,610 --> 00:04:06,612 Andy's coming back today. 77 00:04:07,690 --> 00:04:10,341 Hey, does anybody know where we throw these out? 78 00:04:10,610 --> 00:04:13,614 Oh, my God. It's called a garbage can. 79 00:04:13,690 --> 00:04:14,691 Helpless. 80 00:04:15,290 --> 00:04:17,531 There's two new guys back there with me now. 81 00:04:17,610 --> 00:04:20,659 They're in their 20s. We really get along. 82 00:04:20,850 --> 00:04:22,215 Looking good! 83 00:04:22,330 --> 00:04:26,176 We're just three single guys, getting into trouble. 84 00:04:26,850 --> 00:04:28,614 They're like the new Jim and Dwight. 85 00:04:30,410 --> 00:04:33,380 Oh. Yes. Yes, I see that. Perfect. 86 00:04:34,330 --> 00:04:36,617 Hey, New Jim. Come sit on my face. 87 00:04:37,130 --> 00:04:39,895 No, thank you. My name's Pete. 88 00:04:41,290 --> 00:04:43,452 No, Pete is not the new Jim. 89 00:04:44,010 --> 00:04:45,091 The only thing we have in common 90 00:04:45,170 --> 00:04:47,172 is that neither of us wants to sit on Meredith's face. 91 00:04:48,170 --> 00:04:49,581 And if that makes him the new Jim, 92 00:04:49,690 --> 00:04:52,614 then every human being in the world is the new Jim. 93 00:04:53,010 --> 00:04:54,660 Andy's here! Old Dwight! New Dwight! 94 00:04:54,730 --> 00:04:56,380 Andy's here! New Jim! Tuna! Andy's here! 95 00:04:56,490 --> 00:04:57,491 Pam. He's here. 96 00:04:59,010 --> 00:05:00,091 Hey! 97 00:05:00,290 --> 00:05:01,655 Ah! 98 00:05:01,810 --> 00:05:05,531 Wow! I thought about this place a lot when I was on solo. 99 00:05:06,170 --> 00:05:09,253 Three days on a mountain. It'll change you. 100 00:05:09,330 --> 00:05:10,775 The things we think we need. 101 00:05:10,850 --> 00:05:12,500 Clocks! Yeah, right. 102 00:05:13,090 --> 00:05:15,377 It sounds amazing. Tell us all about it. 103 00:05:15,490 --> 00:05:16,696 What are you still doing here? 104 00:05:17,850 --> 00:05:19,454 Wonderful, thanks. 105 00:05:20,370 --> 00:05:22,816 You know, I had this really funny dream during Outward Bound 106 00:05:22,930 --> 00:05:24,136 that you died. 107 00:05:26,050 --> 00:05:27,336 Brilliant! 108 00:05:28,050 --> 00:05:29,779 See me in my office later. 109 00:05:30,090 --> 00:05:34,061 The new guys! All right. It's Clark and, uh... 110 00:05:34,130 --> 00:05:36,053 Pete. 111 00:05:36,410 --> 00:05:38,060 In Outward Bound, it was all about nicknames. 112 00:05:38,130 --> 00:05:39,780 They called me "iceman." 113 00:05:39,850 --> 00:05:41,614 You will be called Plop. 114 00:05:41,690 --> 00:05:42,737 What? Why? 115 00:05:42,810 --> 00:05:43,811 'Cause you're always taking dumps. 116 00:05:43,890 --> 00:05:44,891 No, I'm not. 117 00:05:44,970 --> 00:05:47,177 Come on, everybody defecates. Relax, Plop. 118 00:05:47,690 --> 00:05:49,772 You will be called Fart. Because you fart all the time. 119 00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:50,851 I love it! 120 00:05:51,210 --> 00:05:53,941 Actually, Andy, we call this one Dwight Jr. 121 00:05:54,010 --> 00:05:55,136 You know, I prefer Fart. 122 00:05:55,210 --> 00:05:58,054 No! Dwight Jr., infinitely better. 123 00:05:58,130 --> 00:06:00,781 You guys look exactly alike. Dwight, go stand next to him. 124 00:06:00,850 --> 00:06:02,659 This is insane. No, we... 125 00:06:02,730 --> 00:06:05,301 I don't see it. I don't either. I don't either. 126 00:06:05,530 --> 00:06:08,977 Whoa! Mind blown! 127 00:06:09,050 --> 00:06:10,131 It's like father and son. 128 00:06:13,650 --> 00:06:15,652 That's... 129 00:06:15,730 --> 00:06:18,301 Dwight, you cool if we call him Dwight Jr.? 130 00:06:19,170 --> 00:06:20,171 Yes. 131 00:06:20,730 --> 00:06:21,891 Yes, lam. 132 00:06:26,010 --> 00:06:27,011 That's okay. 133 00:06:27,410 --> 00:06:28,900 Dwight Jr. 134 00:06:30,770 --> 00:06:32,693 In a way, it's like I have a son. 135 00:06:32,770 --> 00:06:35,057 And who knows? Maybe someday they'll hire someone 136 00:06:35,170 --> 00:06:37,093 who looks like a younger version of him. 137 00:06:37,530 --> 00:06:39,294 And then I'll have a grandson. 138 00:06:39,530 --> 00:06:41,771 Wow, I need to give my cat up for adoption. 139 00:06:41,890 --> 00:06:42,891 Mmm. 140 00:06:43,050 --> 00:06:44,461 The one who uses the doorbell, 141 00:06:44,530 --> 00:06:46,134 or the one with the Mexican hat, 142 00:06:46,210 --> 00:06:48,019 or the one with the rain galoshes, 143 00:06:48,130 --> 00:06:49,939 or the one that you let go around naked? 144 00:06:50,090 --> 00:06:51,615 Angela's cats are cute. 145 00:06:51,730 --> 00:06:54,574 So cute that you just want to eat them. 146 00:06:55,450 --> 00:06:57,418 But you can't eat cats. 147 00:06:58,610 --> 00:07:00,817 You can't eat cats, Kevin. 148 00:07:02,090 --> 00:07:05,776 No, the one with the long hair and the denim pants. Comstock. 149 00:07:05,850 --> 00:07:06,897 Oh! 150 00:07:06,970 --> 00:07:09,701 Okay, look. He's such a special kitty. 151 00:07:09,770 --> 00:07:11,693 I just want to find him a good home. 152 00:07:15,770 --> 00:07:17,454 He loves those pants. 153 00:07:20,130 --> 00:07:21,461 I'll take him. 154 00:07:21,770 --> 00:07:23,340 Please. After the turtle? 155 00:07:23,410 --> 00:07:26,459 I am enormously proud of what I did for that turtle! 156 00:07:26,890 --> 00:07:29,370 Oscar? Oscar, will you take him? 157 00:07:29,450 --> 00:07:30,690 No, I'm a dog person. 158 00:07:31,890 --> 00:07:35,531 If you pray enough, you can change yourself into a cat person. 159 00:07:35,970 --> 00:07:37,574 Those guys always turn back, Angela. 160 00:07:38,210 --> 00:07:42,613 David, Outward Bound was incredible! I was the best at slacklining. 161 00:07:42,690 --> 00:07:43,691 I ate a worm. 162 00:07:43,810 --> 00:07:44,811 I'm glad to hear it. 163 00:07:44,890 --> 00:07:46,938 You sound really confident and decisive. 164 00:07:47,050 --> 00:07:48,814 Hey, you wanted to see me? 165 00:07:48,970 --> 00:07:49,937 Yeah. Got to go, David. 166 00:07:51,330 --> 00:07:52,616 Why is Nellie still here? 167 00:07:52,730 --> 00:07:54,061 You can only fire Nellie for cause. 168 00:07:54,290 --> 00:07:56,816 Mmm. Then I will make up a cause. 169 00:07:57,090 --> 00:07:59,172 Except you just told me you were going to make it up. 170 00:07:59,250 --> 00:08:01,491 Now if she sues, I'll have to testify against you. 171 00:08:01,890 --> 00:08:03,813 Then forget I just told you that. Can't. 172 00:08:04,370 --> 00:08:06,771 I took a course at the Weintraub Memory Academy. 173 00:08:06,850 --> 00:08:09,251 I sat next to this woman named Beverly Brooke, 174 00:08:09,330 --> 00:08:11,253 she had a Greek salad for lunch. 175 00:08:11,410 --> 00:08:12,411 See what I mean? 176 00:08:12,690 --> 00:08:15,500 Now I know why Michael hated you so much. 177 00:08:23,090 --> 00:08:25,661 Good boy. Getting big and strong. 178 00:08:26,090 --> 00:08:27,376 Snack foods! 179 00:08:27,930 --> 00:08:29,455 Yep. 180 00:08:30,170 --> 00:08:31,296 Body by Cheez-it. 181 00:08:31,690 --> 00:08:34,091 Ah! Humor. I have it, too. 182 00:08:35,010 --> 00:08:37,741 Oh, boy, I got a couple of tickets 183 00:08:37,810 --> 00:08:40,051 to the Slayer concert 10 months from now. 184 00:08:40,170 --> 00:08:41,854 You interested? 185 00:08:41,930 --> 00:08:45,218 I think I'm busy that night, or I would. 186 00:08:45,530 --> 00:08:50,218 Mmm. Okay, well, we're both just kind of learning as we go, aren't we? 187 00:08:50,290 --> 00:08:52,019 Learning what? Just 188 00:08:52,610 --> 00:08:54,851 how this is going to be, you know? 189 00:08:56,810 --> 00:08:58,539 You have a beautiful round head. 190 00:09:00,050 --> 00:09:03,054 Okay. So what kind of farming are you into, huh? 191 00:09:03,130 --> 00:09:05,371 More of a fruit man or a root man? 192 00:09:07,890 --> 00:09:11,053 Hey, is this code for, like, gay stuff? 193 00:09:11,730 --> 00:09:13,812 'Cause, if so, that's totally fine. Like, I'm fine with it, 194 00:09:13,890 --> 00:09:16,621 but, you know, you should know that I'm into the ladies. 195 00:09:17,290 --> 00:09:19,531 Spoken like a true root man. 196 00:09:20,050 --> 00:09:21,814 Hey, you know? If you're ever swamped, 197 00:09:21,930 --> 00:09:23,739 I can make some sales calls for you. 198 00:09:24,730 --> 00:09:25,697 My calls? 199 00:09:25,770 --> 00:09:28,137 So could you give me a list of all your clients, 200 00:09:28,250 --> 00:09:30,093 or just the leads that you haven't had time to pursue yet? 201 00:09:30,170 --> 00:09:32,537 You want a list of my clients? You want my leads? 202 00:09:32,650 --> 00:09:34,175 Yeah, I'll just give it a glance. Okay. 203 00:09:34,250 --> 00:09:35,411 I'll give it a read. 204 00:09:35,530 --> 00:09:36,770 You know, with my leads and stuff like that. 205 00:09:37,690 --> 00:09:39,499 Because you're interested in going into sales. 206 00:09:39,570 --> 00:09:41,698 I am. Yeah. Wow, that's great. 207 00:09:41,770 --> 00:09:44,341 That's great. Okay, good. Let's talk about that. 208 00:09:44,410 --> 00:09:45,491 Okay Okay? 209 00:09:46,690 --> 00:09:48,294 You're not getting my clients! 210 00:09:48,370 --> 00:09:49,656 Nice try. 211 00:09:51,130 --> 00:09:53,736 Paranoid? I'm not familiar with the word. 212 00:09:53,810 --> 00:09:56,131 And I really don't have time to learn new words right now, okay? 213 00:09:56,210 --> 00:09:58,736 A pudgy 22-year-old is trying to take my job. 214 00:10:01,530 --> 00:10:04,010 Jim, get ready for the battle of your life. 215 00:10:04,250 --> 00:10:05,615 Done. Explain. 216 00:10:05,890 --> 00:10:08,700 The new guys. Dwight Jr. is after my job. 217 00:10:08,770 --> 00:10:12,331 Yeah. There is a shark hiding inside that adorable little cherub. 218 00:10:12,410 --> 00:10:13,696 Oh! Now I get what Pete was talking about 219 00:10:13,810 --> 00:10:15,175 at the sales meeting yesterday. 220 00:10:15,970 --> 00:10:18,291 Wait, sales? What sales meeting? 221 00:10:18,570 --> 00:10:19,617 The new guys called one. 222 00:10:19,810 --> 00:10:20,891 The new guys called a sales meeting? 223 00:10:20,970 --> 00:10:23,496 Clark ended the whole thing with a karate demonstration. 224 00:10:23,570 --> 00:10:25,140 Did you know there was a belt above black? 225 00:10:25,770 --> 00:10:27,181 There is no belt above black. 226 00:10:27,930 --> 00:10:29,819 Is there a belt above black? You should ask him. 227 00:10:29,890 --> 00:10:31,255 It's a color you would never expect. 228 00:10:35,170 --> 00:10:37,218 Too easy. 229 00:10:37,490 --> 00:10:40,539 Attention, everyone! Comstock is still available. 230 00:10:40,770 --> 00:10:43,137 Oscar has been flirting with adopting him, 231 00:10:43,290 --> 00:10:45,611 but still hasn't given me a definite yes or no. 232 00:10:45,690 --> 00:10:47,533 Definitely no. Fine. 233 00:10:47,970 --> 00:10:51,656 For any interested candidates, I will be conducting 20-minute interviews. 234 00:10:52,210 --> 00:10:57,376 My ideal situation would be an independently wealthy cute couple 235 00:10:57,450 --> 00:10:59,020 with a strong commitment to education. 236 00:10:59,330 --> 00:11:02,015 Black or white, I'm fine with either, but not both. 237 00:11:02,370 --> 00:11:05,419 Listen, you're in this, but you need to wow me, okay? 238 00:11:07,650 --> 00:11:10,938 I wanted to talk to you about our working relationship this year. 239 00:11:11,010 --> 00:11:12,614 It's going to be terrible. 240 00:11:13,330 --> 00:11:15,014 Not necessarily. 241 00:11:15,090 --> 00:11:18,094 No, I'm going to make sure that it is, 242 00:11:18,170 --> 00:11:21,697 and if it isn't, I will take immediate action to rectify that. 243 00:11:22,730 --> 00:11:26,530 Now, I don't like to throw around the "B" word. 244 00:11:27,370 --> 00:11:29,850 But I'm going to be a huge bitch to you. 245 00:11:32,050 --> 00:11:35,133 Now this is called slacklining. 246 00:11:35,210 --> 00:11:37,178 I set up the old slackline to teach the office 247 00:11:37,250 --> 00:11:39,457 the skills of focus and discipline, 248 00:11:39,730 --> 00:11:41,653 or in the case of certain individuals, 249 00:11:41,730 --> 00:11:45,052 the skills of humiliation and looking really dumb. 250 00:11:45,570 --> 00:11:47,971 If you make it all the way across, your confidence will soar. 251 00:11:48,050 --> 00:11:51,816 But if you Toby out, 252 00:11:52,130 --> 00:11:53,370 then you'll feel like a real Nellie. 253 00:11:53,810 --> 00:11:55,494 How about a hand, screw those guys. 254 00:11:56,370 --> 00:12:00,011 Now, these are my actual Outward Bound counselors, Rafe and Feather. 255 00:12:00,090 --> 00:12:01,933 Iceman. That's me. 256 00:12:02,450 --> 00:12:04,498 The powder is for your protection. 257 00:12:04,570 --> 00:12:06,299 Feather has permanent athlete's foot. 258 00:12:06,370 --> 00:12:09,692 Feather, show them how you dance upon the line of slack. 259 00:12:13,570 --> 00:12:15,060 You, uh, you a sports guy? 260 00:12:15,650 --> 00:12:18,176 Sure. Boxing, tennis. 261 00:12:18,250 --> 00:12:20,173 Oh! Any team sports? 262 00:12:21,090 --> 00:12:23,092 The Amazing Race. 263 00:12:24,810 --> 00:12:26,494 Phillies fan though, right? 264 00:12:26,570 --> 00:12:27,776 You mean horses? 265 00:12:28,170 --> 00:12:30,901 No. Like baseball, the baseball team. 266 00:12:30,970 --> 00:12:33,701 I like the Red Sox. I'm from Vermont, so... 267 00:12:33,770 --> 00:12:35,738 Okay. Good talk. 268 00:12:37,250 --> 00:12:39,457 I have nothing in common with Plop. 269 00:12:39,770 --> 00:12:41,534 All right, who's next? Nellie! 270 00:12:42,450 --> 00:12:45,340 Oh, I would rather watch you and your talented friends. 271 00:12:45,690 --> 00:12:47,215 Nonsense, get up here. 272 00:12:47,330 --> 00:12:48,820 Go ahead. 273 00:12:48,890 --> 00:12:50,096 Come on. 274 00:12:53,210 --> 00:12:55,178 Uh, you going to wear your heels? 275 00:12:55,650 --> 00:12:57,618 I'm very self-conscious about my feet. 276 00:12:57,890 --> 00:13:02,054 Okay. There you go! Attagirl. 277 00:13:02,130 --> 00:13:05,816 Hey, all right. Whoa, you suck. 278 00:13:07,450 --> 00:13:09,259 All right, who's next? Darryl? 279 00:13:09,610 --> 00:13:10,577 This seems like the kind of thing 280 00:13:10,690 --> 00:13:11,771 white people with dreadlocks do. 281 00:13:12,130 --> 00:13:13,973 Dwight Jr.? This looks like your speed. 282 00:13:14,290 --> 00:13:16,213 Uh, I guess I could give it a shot. 283 00:13:16,290 --> 00:13:17,701 Yeah, come on. Get up here. 284 00:13:18,410 --> 00:13:20,572 Just hop on up. Okay. 285 00:13:20,970 --> 00:13:22,779 Focus on the horizon. 286 00:13:25,090 --> 00:13:27,331 Whoa! Look at this guy! 287 00:13:31,330 --> 00:13:33,537 I've always been good at anything that required balance. 288 00:13:33,610 --> 00:13:35,658 My doctor says I have gigantic inner ears. 289 00:13:37,250 --> 00:13:39,059 - Go, Dwight Jr.! - That was insane! 290 00:13:39,490 --> 00:13:40,571 Yes! 291 00:13:40,690 --> 00:13:41,771 Boo! Unimpressed! 292 00:13:41,850 --> 00:13:44,217 It's a tightrope for babies! Boo! 293 00:13:44,370 --> 00:13:46,179 All right, let's see you do it. All right. Let me show you 294 00:13:46,250 --> 00:13:48,491 how a real man walks across a flaccid cord. 295 00:13:59,850 --> 00:14:01,056 Oh! 296 00:14:02,010 --> 00:14:03,694 Who ordered the hot apple fail? 297 00:14:03,770 --> 00:14:06,011 Okay. Lam just getting started, okay? 298 00:14:07,770 --> 00:14:09,738 You got this. This is all you. 299 00:14:11,410 --> 00:14:12,855 Oh! 300 00:14:13,530 --> 00:14:14,531 Oh! Oh! 301 00:14:15,370 --> 00:14:16,701 Got ourselves a yard sale! 302 00:14:18,250 --> 00:14:19,615 Ah! 303 00:14:20,210 --> 00:14:21,541 Oh! Oh! 304 00:14:21,970 --> 00:14:24,371 Balls and face! It's not a race, Dwight. 305 00:14:29,770 --> 00:14:34,173 Well, it's official. Old Dwight is lame and New Dwight is cool. 306 00:14:34,250 --> 00:14:35,456 That's not true. 307 00:14:37,090 --> 00:14:39,013 - Just give me another chance. - But your mouth is... 308 00:14:39,090 --> 00:14:41,616 This is a bloodbath. All right, I'm calling this. 309 00:14:41,890 --> 00:14:44,973 What? It's enough of this. Everyone, let's go back to work. 310 00:14:45,050 --> 00:14:46,620 This is a stupid activity. This is not okay. 311 00:14:46,690 --> 00:14:48,738 I would be embarrassed to be good at it. 312 00:14:55,530 --> 00:14:56,736 Idiots! 313 00:15:06,650 --> 00:15:09,176 Slacklining. Big deal. 314 00:15:09,250 --> 00:15:12,493 Untie that rope, give it to a couple of pigtailed schoolgirls, 315 00:15:12,570 --> 00:15:15,972 let them start jumping with it while chanting a rhyme and giggling about boys. 316 00:15:16,370 --> 00:15:19,772 Doesn't seem so macho now, does it? It's a jump rope! 317 00:15:32,450 --> 00:15:33,781 Dwight? 318 00:15:36,490 --> 00:15:39,334 Pam? Hey, I'm up here. Up the ladder, come on. 319 00:15:50,890 --> 00:15:51,971 What are you doing? 320 00:15:53,130 --> 00:15:55,132 Come here, I'll show you. 321 00:15:58,130 --> 00:16:00,178 Why do you want this cat? 322 00:16:00,650 --> 00:16:01,856 Um, I don't want it, really. 323 00:16:01,970 --> 00:16:03,176 How would you support the cat? 324 00:16:03,250 --> 00:16:04,979 What are your ambitions? 325 00:16:05,090 --> 00:16:06,774 I want to start my own business. 326 00:16:06,850 --> 00:16:08,659 I want to be a millionaire, lots of things. 327 00:16:08,810 --> 00:16:10,653 Travel. Make the world a better place. 328 00:16:11,250 --> 00:16:12,979 Earn an MBA at night. 329 00:16:13,450 --> 00:16:15,532 Have you taken any concrete steps? 330 00:16:15,970 --> 00:16:18,701 Well, I'm still just fitting in here, 331 00:16:18,810 --> 00:16:20,972 you know, getting used to the new job. Mmm-hmm. 332 00:16:21,090 --> 00:16:23,138 But definitely on the agenda. 333 00:16:24,410 --> 00:16:27,414 But that is a good idea, Angela. I should make a list. 334 00:16:27,650 --> 00:16:29,493 Oh, come on, Pete! 335 00:16:31,010 --> 00:16:32,660 That's just sad. 336 00:16:32,730 --> 00:16:37,338 If he doesn't watch himself, he's going to be here for years doing nothing. 337 00:16:43,130 --> 00:16:45,417 Wow, maybe Pete is the new Jim. 338 00:16:49,890 --> 00:16:53,258 Do you see how the trapeze completely surrounds the wire? 339 00:16:53,490 --> 00:16:56,892 That means it is literally impossible for anyone to fall off. 340 00:16:56,970 --> 00:16:59,780 So you will merely sit below and be my counterweight 341 00:16:59,850 --> 00:17:02,933 as I pedal across the parking lot to that telephone pole. 342 00:17:03,010 --> 00:17:04,296 I will? You Will. 343 00:17:04,370 --> 00:17:05,940 Yeah, we weigh about the same, wouldn't you say? 344 00:17:06,370 --> 00:17:08,691 Sure, if you weigh 105 pounds. 345 00:17:09,010 --> 00:17:10,580 So you'll do it? No. 346 00:17:10,650 --> 00:17:14,097 Come on, this will be the only thrill of your boring life. 347 00:17:14,570 --> 00:17:18,131 Dwight, you may find this hard to believe, but I love my boring life. 348 00:17:18,210 --> 00:17:19,621 Come on! Exactly the way it is. 349 00:17:19,730 --> 00:17:20,777 No, Pam. Yes! 350 00:17:20,890 --> 00:17:23,291 And there's nothing you can say that would get me to run 351 00:17:23,370 --> 00:17:25,099 the slightest risk of losing it. 352 00:17:25,170 --> 00:17:26,217 Please? Please, Pam? 353 00:17:26,570 --> 00:17:28,777 Find someone else. I don't know, ask Phyllis. 354 00:17:29,050 --> 00:17:30,700 I can't use Phyllis. Are you kidding me? 355 00:17:30,770 --> 00:17:33,819 The moment she steps off this bar, I'll be launched into space. 356 00:17:33,890 --> 00:17:35,779 God! You're so insensitive. 357 00:17:41,250 --> 00:17:43,218 Why are you getting rid of it? Allergies. 358 00:17:43,810 --> 00:17:45,892 Your husband? No, the baby. 359 00:17:45,970 --> 00:17:47,734 Please, it's my husband's favorite cat. 360 00:17:48,170 --> 00:17:49,376 He's broken up about it. 361 00:17:49,450 --> 00:17:52,215 It's the only time I've seen him cry, other than our wedding night. 362 00:17:53,250 --> 00:17:55,617 You know what? I will take Comstock. 363 00:17:55,690 --> 00:17:58,011 Really? Oh, Oscar, thank you. 364 00:17:59,930 --> 00:18:01,534 I'll come by after work and pick him up. 365 00:18:01,890 --> 00:18:06,418 Yay! Oh! Poor Robert. He won't get to say goodbye. 366 00:18:06,490 --> 00:18:08,174 He has this business dinner tonight. 367 00:18:08,970 --> 00:18:10,256 (Test la vie. 368 00:18:11,090 --> 00:18:12,660 Please don't teach the cat French. 369 00:18:15,450 --> 00:18:18,852 Yeah, good news. Tonight, when you come over for dinner, 370 00:18:18,930 --> 00:18:21,297 you can play with your old buddy, Comstock. 371 00:18:30,490 --> 00:18:31,855 You ready? 372 00:18:31,970 --> 00:18:32,971 Yeah. 373 00:18:33,650 --> 00:18:34,731 You know what? I'll meet you down there. 374 00:18:34,810 --> 00:18:36,050 I just got to make a quick call. 375 00:18:36,250 --> 00:18:37,615 Okay- 376 00:18:45,810 --> 00:18:46,936 Okay- 377 00:18:48,010 --> 00:18:49,421 All right. 378 00:18:51,970 --> 00:18:53,210 Oh, God. 379 00:19:28,890 --> 00:19:31,973 Attention, employees of Dunder Mifflin! 380 00:19:32,170 --> 00:19:37,301 Everyone thinks the new guys are so cool, 'cause they can slackline. 381 00:19:37,650 --> 00:19:39,061 Ooh! 382 00:19:39,170 --> 00:19:41,935 Hey, Clark! This is what a real salesman looks like! 383 00:19:44,050 --> 00:19:47,497 They say that you only live once, and I'm about to prove it! 384 00:19:47,570 --> 00:19:48,901 Dwight Schrute! 385 00:19:48,970 --> 00:19:50,017 Dwight! 386 00:19:50,730 --> 00:19:54,291 Hey, man, it's Halpert. Did you go to the other guy yet? 387 00:19:54,370 --> 00:19:56,418 Great. Don't. I'm in. 388 00:19:59,530 --> 00:20:01,498 Yeah. Yep, I'm all in. 389 00:20:02,690 --> 00:20:04,374 Okay, talk to you soon. Bye. 390 00:20:10,370 --> 00:20:11,610 Yeah! 391 00:20:25,730 --> 00:20:27,459 - Call someone? - Call somebody! 392 00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:31,731 Hold on, Dwight! 393 00:20:34,890 --> 00:20:37,655 In the parking lot today, there was a circus. 394 00:20:37,730 --> 00:20:39,778 A copier did tricks on the high wire. 395 00:20:39,890 --> 00:20:42,939 A lady tried to give away a baby that looked like a cat. 396 00:20:43,010 --> 00:20:46,537 There was a Dwight impersonator and a Jim impersonator. 397 00:20:46,610 --> 00:20:48,419 A strongman crushed a turtle. 398 00:20:48,770 --> 00:20:50,932 I laughed and I cried. 399 00:20:51,970 --> 00:20:55,258 Not bad for a day "m the “fie of a dog food company. 400 00:21:00,530 --> 00:21:02,498 Crap. Sorry, Nellie! 401 00:21:02,570 --> 00:21:05,858 Once again, I understand that old habits die hard, 402 00:21:05,930 --> 00:21:10,618 but if everyone would kindly walk their refuse to the trash bins 403 00:21:10,690 --> 00:21:13,011 instead of tossing them, then we wouldn't... 404 00:21:13,610 --> 00:21:14,611 Oh! 405 00:21:14,690 --> 00:21:15,691 Swish. 406 00:21:15,850 --> 00:21:17,261 It was nothing to do with me. 407 00:21:17,330 --> 00:21:19,776 I just happen to be sitting near to where the bins are. 408 00:21:22,130 --> 00:21:24,815 There are two things that I am passionate about, 409 00:21:24,890 --> 00:21:26,130 recycling 410 00:21:26,330 --> 00:21:27,934 and revenge. 411 00:21:29,290 --> 00:21:30,974 Fluke.