1 00:00:01,550 --> 00:00:03,712 All right, everybody, great season of softball. 2 00:00:03,790 --> 00:00:05,155 I'm super proud of you guys, 3 00:00:05,230 --> 00:00:07,073 and I think you're going to like this 4 00:00:07,150 --> 00:00:08,959 little highlight reel that I've put together. 5 00:00:09,750 --> 00:00:11,354 Dunder Mifflin! 6 00:00:11,670 --> 00:00:12,956 Andy Bernard presents, 7 00:00:13,030 --> 00:00:15,317 "Summer Softball Epic Fails!" 8 00:00:16,470 --> 00:00:17,471 Fail. 9 00:00:19,110 --> 00:00:20,271 Fail! That's me! 10 00:00:21,470 --> 00:00:22,995 Fail. Is this like a blooper reel? 11 00:00:23,150 --> 00:00:25,596 A blooper reel? What is this, 2005? 12 00:00:25,990 --> 00:00:28,277 Do I look like Bob Saget? Fail! 13 00:00:30,110 --> 00:00:31,111 Who's this guy? 14 00:00:33,870 --> 00:00:35,235 Look at him dance! 15 00:00:35,310 --> 00:00:36,914 Fail! Fail. 16 00:00:36,990 --> 00:00:38,640 I deserved that. 17 00:00:38,710 --> 00:00:40,075 Do-dee-do-dee-do 18 00:00:41,150 --> 00:00:42,390 That was a triple. 19 00:00:42,470 --> 00:00:45,280 Can't take the fail? Get out of the fail video! 20 00:00:45,350 --> 00:00:46,431 My pleasure. 21 00:00:46,510 --> 00:00:50,356 Hi, I'm Pete! Puberty is such a drag, man. 22 00:00:50,750 --> 00:00:54,755 And I'm Clark, I like to eat toilet paper. We fail! 23 00:00:56,990 --> 00:00:58,674 I'd like to take a solemn moment to remember 24 00:00:58,750 --> 00:01:00,275 Jerry in the warehouse, 25 00:01:00,630 --> 00:01:02,394 who passed away this year. 26 00:01:06,630 --> 00:01:08,155 Well, that's all, folks! 27 00:01:08,510 --> 00:01:13,038 Ski you later, everybody! Thanks for a great season. 28 00:01:13,110 --> 00:01:16,512 What was that? That was just normal video with you making vulgar noises. 29 00:01:16,830 --> 00:01:18,434 Well, I worked with what I had, Oscar. 30 00:01:18,510 --> 00:01:21,912 Next time do more fail-ier stuff, okay? 31 00:01:22,470 --> 00:01:24,074 What happened to that video I sent you? 32 00:01:24,150 --> 00:01:27,518 Oh, that wasn't... That didn't work. That was not the right... 33 00:01:27,630 --> 00:01:29,598 I think I've got it right here. 34 00:01:29,670 --> 00:01:31,035 No. 35 00:01:38,310 --> 00:01:39,675 Oh! 36 00:01:43,310 --> 00:01:44,471 That was not a fail! 37 00:01:44,550 --> 00:01:45,517 Fail! Fail! Fail! 38 00:01:45,590 --> 00:01:46,671 That was actually a serious accident 39 00:01:46,750 --> 00:01:48,559 that could have resulted in severe bodily harm. 40 00:01:48,750 --> 00:01:50,354 Fail! Fail! Fail! You're all failing right now. 41 00:01:50,430 --> 00:01:54,230 Congratulations on your epic fail of the use of the word "fail!" 42 00:01:56,030 --> 00:02:02,104 Someone needs to stop Clearway Law. Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers. 43 00:02:06,230 --> 00:02:07,231 Oh, God. 44 00:02:09,750 --> 00:02:10,797 What's going on? 45 00:02:10,910 --> 00:02:12,116 Nothing! Nothing is going on. 46 00:02:12,390 --> 00:02:13,880 Keep moving, please. What's he measuring? 47 00:02:13,950 --> 00:02:16,430 Okay, excuse me, lam the landlord. 48 00:02:16,590 --> 00:02:18,957 This is between me and the management, no one else. Please. 49 00:02:19,070 --> 00:02:21,994 It's an EMF hotspot. Oh, my God! 50 00:02:22,270 --> 00:02:23,556 It stands for electromagnetic field, 51 00:02:23,630 --> 00:02:25,314 generally caused by a concentration 52 00:02:25,390 --> 00:02:26,915 of wiring in one area, 53 00:02:27,430 --> 00:02:30,161 especially if poorly insulated, Dwight. 54 00:02:30,670 --> 00:02:31,671 Um. 55 00:02:31,750 --> 00:02:33,752 Okay, I'm just walking in to this. 56 00:02:33,990 --> 00:02:36,800 Am I to understand there's a beehive in the wall? 57 00:02:37,230 --> 00:02:39,551 You think I have a machine for measuring beehives? 58 00:02:39,630 --> 00:02:41,439 I was just asking a question, Toby. 59 00:02:41,510 --> 00:02:42,875 How are you not murdered every hour? 60 00:02:43,630 --> 00:02:46,361 Well, I'm not getting paid to work in a microwave oven. 61 00:02:46,670 --> 00:02:49,674 Okay, listen. Everything here is up to code. 62 00:02:50,030 --> 00:02:52,237 "Oh, the wires need insulation." 63 00:02:52,630 --> 00:02:55,634 It's a wire, people. I'm not buying it a fur coat. 64 00:03:00,830 --> 00:03:02,116 Thank you. You got it. 65 00:03:02,270 --> 00:03:06,320 Last week, I finally told Pam about the other job I took in Philly, 66 00:03:06,390 --> 00:03:10,714 the side job, and she was so incredibly cool about it. 67 00:03:11,350 --> 00:03:14,001 And now I just want to do something huge for her. 68 00:03:15,430 --> 00:03:17,159 Like if we were in some biker bar 69 00:03:17,230 --> 00:03:19,073 and she mouthed off to some bikers 70 00:03:19,150 --> 00:03:21,915 and they came lumbering over and I was like... Wham! 71 00:03:21,990 --> 00:03:23,992 "You've got to go through me first!" 72 00:03:33,190 --> 00:03:34,521 Andy, could I have a word, please? 73 00:03:34,590 --> 00:03:36,911 It won't take a moment, it's extremely important, 74 00:03:36,990 --> 00:03:39,311 and it really has to happen now. 75 00:03:39,750 --> 00:03:41,832 Fine. I will give you one minute. 76 00:03:41,990 --> 00:03:43,515 Oh, please don't use the hourglass. 77 00:03:43,590 --> 00:03:45,718 You have one minute and your minute has begun, 78 00:03:45,790 --> 00:03:47,792 and no time will be added at the end, 79 00:03:47,910 --> 00:03:49,674 even to accommodate this sentence, 80 00:03:49,750 --> 00:03:52,481 with all of its baroque dependent clauses 81 00:03:52,550 --> 00:03:56,191 and cascading turns of phrase. 82 00:03:56,790 --> 00:03:58,599 I'm trying to adopt a baby. 83 00:03:58,670 --> 00:03:59,876 A baby what? 84 00:04:00,070 --> 00:04:01,071 A human? 85 00:04:02,030 --> 00:04:05,716 And the agency requires a character reference from my employer. 86 00:04:06,150 --> 00:04:07,151 Oh. 87 00:04:07,270 --> 00:04:09,432 You wouldn't have to do anything. I'd write the letter myself. 88 00:04:09,510 --> 00:04:11,000 You'd just simply sign it. So... 89 00:04:11,710 --> 00:04:12,711 Okay- 90 00:04:12,830 --> 00:04:16,835 And fall right into your plagiarism entrapment scheme? 91 00:04:17,390 --> 00:04:18,880 I don't think so. It's... No, it's... 92 00:04:18,950 --> 00:04:21,715 And I happen to notice you're down to about 30 seconds here. 93 00:04:21,790 --> 00:04:22,871 If I could just convince you that you... 94 00:04:22,950 --> 00:04:24,076 And those sand grains are 95 00:04:24,150 --> 00:04:25,993 tumbling with fury down the side... 96 00:04:26,070 --> 00:04:27,276 It's not entrapment 97 00:04:27,350 --> 00:04:28,840 if I'm writing... of the hourglass. 98 00:04:28,910 --> 00:04:30,753 Time's up! Fine. 99 00:04:32,310 --> 00:04:33,721 Sure, I'll read her letter. 100 00:04:33,830 --> 00:04:37,039 And if she tells the truth about how evil and unfit 101 00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:39,761 to be a mother she is, then, yeah, I'll sign that. 102 00:04:40,590 --> 00:04:43,241 "Statistical correlations exist between EMF 103 00:04:43,310 --> 00:04:45,711 "radiation and various health hazards, 104 00:04:46,310 --> 00:04:49,439 "but mainstream studies are inconclusive." 105 00:04:49,750 --> 00:04:52,071 That means you can't make me do squat. 106 00:04:52,390 --> 00:04:53,391 You better fix this! 107 00:04:53,510 --> 00:04:56,639 I already ditched my uterus, and I ain't losing any more good parts! 108 00:04:56,710 --> 00:04:58,121 You people don't realize what you're asking. 109 00:04:58,190 --> 00:04:59,874 I'd have to rip open the walls. 110 00:04:59,950 --> 00:05:02,112 We'd have to shut this place down for a week. 111 00:05:03,750 --> 00:05:05,320 A week off, that'd be great. 112 00:05:16,830 --> 00:05:19,356 Hey, if you don't want to teach me the PowerPoint, just say so. 113 00:05:19,430 --> 00:05:20,511 I don't want to teach you PowerPoint. 114 00:05:20,590 --> 00:05:21,591 Come on. 115 00:05:21,750 --> 00:05:23,161 Just show me the PowerPoint. 116 00:05:23,230 --> 00:05:24,197 Just do the tutorial! 117 00:05:24,270 --> 00:05:25,317 You're the tutorial. 118 00:05:25,470 --> 00:05:27,757 No, dude, I'm not. I'm not the tutorial. 119 00:05:27,950 --> 00:05:29,395 You could be. Mmm-mmm. 120 00:05:31,950 --> 00:05:33,554 What are you doing? 121 00:05:33,630 --> 00:05:35,200 Getting my wife a week off from work. 122 00:05:35,630 --> 00:05:36,791 You popped one kernel. 123 00:05:37,350 --> 00:05:38,761 Awesome, right? 124 00:05:41,590 --> 00:05:43,752 So Creed is that dude's stepdad? 125 00:05:44,110 --> 00:05:45,396 Correct. 126 00:05:46,470 --> 00:05:49,952 Well, I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm just going to say it. 127 00:05:50,150 --> 00:05:52,630 I'm nervous. I have no idea what 128 00:05:52,710 --> 00:05:54,474 health problems this is all going to cause. 129 00:05:54,590 --> 00:05:56,911 What? Come on. 130 00:05:57,350 --> 00:05:59,079 I'm sorry. I'm not growing a third arm. 131 00:05:59,270 --> 00:06:00,840 I know what Jim is trying to do. 132 00:06:00,950 --> 00:06:02,315 He's trying to get Big Bad Dwight 133 00:06:02,390 --> 00:06:03,880 to shell out for a huge repairjob 134 00:06:03,990 --> 00:06:06,118 while lucky Jimbo gets a paid vacation. 135 00:06:06,190 --> 00:06:07,919 Well, sorry, lucky Jimbo. 136 00:06:07,990 --> 00:06:10,231 I can live very happily in a magnetic field. 137 00:06:10,310 --> 00:06:12,961 Most of my childhood heroes got their powers that way. 138 00:06:13,910 --> 00:06:16,390 "Side effects of EMF include headaches." 139 00:06:16,510 --> 00:06:17,750 Had them all my life. 140 00:06:17,830 --> 00:06:19,514 "Breast pain." 141 00:06:19,590 --> 00:06:21,797 No knobbies, no probbies. Nice try, Jim. 142 00:06:22,110 --> 00:06:23,521 Oof'. "infertility." 143 00:06:26,350 --> 00:06:27,351 Yeah, right. 144 00:06:34,830 --> 00:06:35,831 Ah. 145 00:06:35,990 --> 00:06:38,311 There's my popcorn. Can you just grab that for me? 146 00:06:38,710 --> 00:06:40,997 Keep your snacks on your side, Jim, idiot. 147 00:06:41,830 --> 00:06:43,241 What the... What? 148 00:06:46,030 --> 00:06:47,191 Some of these kernels have crowned. 149 00:06:47,310 --> 00:06:50,359 That's impossible, becausethafs a brand-new bag... 150 00:06:52,190 --> 00:06:53,760 Oh, my God. 151 00:06:57,030 --> 00:06:58,111 Andy! 152 00:07:02,150 --> 00:07:03,754 I'm going to drive you up to the lake. 153 00:07:03,830 --> 00:07:06,913 Give you a whole week on the water, just you, me and the kids. 154 00:07:07,110 --> 00:07:08,953 Can we stop by that pie stand on the way? 155 00:07:09,030 --> 00:07:12,557 You mean Laverne's Pies Tires Fixed Also? Yes, we will be doing that. 156 00:07:12,630 --> 00:07:13,756 We'll be getting a dozen. 157 00:07:13,830 --> 00:07:15,958 A dozen different pies? 'Cause that means rhubarb. 158 00:07:16,030 --> 00:07:18,476 Why would you say that? I meant four apple, four blueberry, 159 00:07:18,550 --> 00:07:21,235 two cherry, one peach, one chocolate. I thought that was implied. 160 00:07:21,310 --> 00:07:22,516 Yeah, okay, then. 161 00:07:22,710 --> 00:07:25,077 Ladies and gentlemen! I have heard your complaints 162 00:07:25,150 --> 00:07:27,278 and we reached a settlement. 163 00:07:27,710 --> 00:07:31,078 So, we will be leaving the office for one whole week. 164 00:07:31,470 --> 00:07:32,471 Nice job. 165 00:07:33,350 --> 00:07:35,159 In my contract it is stipulated 166 00:07:35,230 --> 00:07:37,278 that I provide a temporary workspace. 167 00:07:37,350 --> 00:07:39,352 It will arrive in one hour. What? 168 00:07:40,590 --> 00:07:42,160 What's this? Whoa. What? 169 00:07:42,390 --> 00:07:43,437 Bring it in. 170 00:07:43,510 --> 00:07:46,116 Roll into the future with Work Bus. 171 00:07:46,230 --> 00:07:48,915 Say goodbye to wasteful buildings. 172 00:07:49,030 --> 00:07:52,239 These days a mobile office isn't just for hotshot politicians. 173 00:07:52,310 --> 00:07:54,358 Now anyone can rent a work bus. 174 00:07:54,430 --> 00:07:58,151 If you've got a parking lot, a work space is just a phone call away. 175 00:07:58,230 --> 00:08:01,632 In this age of belt-tightening and less empowered workers, 176 00:08:01,830 --> 00:08:05,152 a work bus is how tomorrow gets things done. 177 00:08:08,470 --> 00:08:09,676 They're a hundred pack... 178 00:08:09,750 --> 00:08:11,514 No six pack for me. 179 00:08:13,430 --> 00:08:14,795 Six. Yes. 180 00:08:16,070 --> 00:08:17,401 Sorry. Oh, my God! 181 00:08:17,910 --> 00:08:20,231 Ah! Sorry. Lose weight! 182 00:08:20,750 --> 00:08:22,240 I'm trying, sorry. 183 00:08:25,710 --> 00:08:29,601 Oh, The Pennsylvania Department of Public Welfare Pre-Adoption Standard. 184 00:08:29,750 --> 00:08:31,957 Oh, of course, you were adopted. 185 00:08:33,230 --> 00:08:36,871 I wish! No, I made some short lists, 186 00:08:36,950 --> 00:08:38,873 I had a couple of sleepovers, but I never 187 00:08:38,990 --> 00:08:40,958 managed to get in the end zone. 188 00:08:41,390 --> 00:08:42,676 I don't know what it was. 189 00:08:43,630 --> 00:08:46,031 Not loveable, maybe. Oh, well. 190 00:08:46,510 --> 00:08:48,160 Listen, I'm really struggling with this form. 191 00:08:48,230 --> 00:08:51,074 But as you know the system, do you think maybe you could... 192 00:08:51,150 --> 00:08:53,198 Absolutely. I know exactly what they want to hear. 193 00:08:53,270 --> 00:08:54,556 I would love to help. 194 00:08:54,630 --> 00:08:56,837 Oh, thank you so much! 195 00:08:57,430 --> 00:08:59,751 Just, don't tell Andy, because“. 196 00:08:59,830 --> 00:09:01,753 He hates me. Thinks I'm a monster. 197 00:09:01,830 --> 00:09:03,673 Should go back to Loch Ness. 198 00:09:04,590 --> 00:09:07,036 Stretch. All right. 199 00:09:07,870 --> 00:09:10,441 How many times do you need to take a stroll? 200 00:09:10,630 --> 00:09:13,520 I... My legs cramp up, okay? It's a circulation issue. 201 00:09:13,590 --> 00:09:15,319 Boy, I will hammerspank your rear. 202 00:09:15,390 --> 00:09:17,870 All right, all right, gang. Let's just settle down. 203 00:09:17,950 --> 00:09:19,031 You're yelling in her face. 204 00:09:19,150 --> 00:09:20,356 It's a medical thing. 205 00:09:20,470 --> 00:09:21,801 Just... We good? 206 00:09:21,910 --> 00:09:23,275 I'm good! All right? 207 00:09:23,550 --> 00:09:26,315 I'm so sorry for all of this. 208 00:09:27,030 --> 00:09:30,796 It's okay. You know what they say, a change is as good as a rest. 209 00:09:32,070 --> 00:09:33,959 I need to get to the paper, please. 210 00:09:34,830 --> 00:09:35,991 Oh, God! Oh! 211 00:09:36,070 --> 00:09:37,993 Ah! Oh, my God! Are you okay? 212 00:09:38,070 --> 00:09:39,117 All right, I'll get you a napkin. 213 00:09:39,190 --> 00:09:40,271 Can someone get napkins, please? 214 00:09:40,350 --> 00:09:43,160 You know what? It's fine. It's fine. Let me just... It's fine. 215 00:09:43,230 --> 00:09:45,198 Pam, I'm really sorry. I just... 216 00:09:46,830 --> 00:09:48,958 I'm... I'm really sorry about all that. 217 00:09:52,870 --> 00:09:53,871 Really? Smirking? 218 00:09:54,990 --> 00:09:56,799 What can I say? I love justice. 219 00:09:56,870 --> 00:09:58,793 You forced me to spend money on needless repairs. 220 00:09:58,870 --> 00:10:00,759 And now you're locked in a prison bus 221 00:10:00,830 --> 00:10:02,798 and your woman drips with beverage. 222 00:10:02,870 --> 00:10:05,237 Hey, Dwight, I was trying to do something nice for Pam. 223 00:10:05,310 --> 00:10:07,153 Can you just help me out? 224 00:10:07,230 --> 00:10:09,232 Can we maybe take this thing somewhere? 225 00:10:09,310 --> 00:10:11,961 Or do something to not make this the worst day ever? 226 00:10:12,030 --> 00:10:14,351 It's not my responsibility to solve your marriage problems 227 00:10:14,430 --> 00:10:17,274 by spending my money on gas. 228 00:10:19,470 --> 00:10:20,471 Andy! 229 00:10:21,590 --> 00:10:22,876 Yo, Toonces. 230 00:10:22,950 --> 00:10:24,031 You're the boss. Don't you think 231 00:10:24,110 --> 00:10:25,157 we'd all be a lot more productive 232 00:10:25,230 --> 00:10:27,597 if while we were doing work, we looked up and saw 233 00:10:27,670 --> 00:10:30,196 the best rural pie stand in Pennsylvania? 234 00:10:30,270 --> 00:10:31,510 I know I'd be more productive. 235 00:10:31,630 --> 00:10:32,836 As would I. 236 00:10:32,910 --> 00:10:33,911 No question. 237 00:10:33,990 --> 00:10:36,357 No, no, this is a work bus. 238 00:10:36,430 --> 00:10:38,273 The wheels are for transporting 239 00:10:38,390 --> 00:10:40,233 the work space to and from the work site. 240 00:10:40,310 --> 00:10:41,471 What are you talking about? 241 00:10:41,550 --> 00:10:43,757 You're not the boss. Andy is. Andy? 242 00:10:44,430 --> 00:10:48,640 Pies! Pies! Pies! Pies! Pies! Pies! 243 00:10:48,750 --> 00:10:52,436 All right! The fat people have spoken! 244 00:10:52,950 --> 00:10:54,952 Dwight, get this bus moving. 245 00:10:57,870 --> 00:11:01,272 Next stop, Laverne's Pies Tires Fixed Also! 246 00:11:01,350 --> 00:11:03,193 Oh, yes! 247 00:11:07,710 --> 00:11:11,510 So it looks like this work bus was a pretty good idea after all, huh? 248 00:11:11,670 --> 00:11:13,195 Get your foot behind the yellow line. 249 00:11:13,270 --> 00:11:14,795 You got it. 250 00:11:27,710 --> 00:11:29,041 Stop. Come back. 251 00:11:29,110 --> 00:11:30,350 Too late. Hmm. 252 00:11:30,830 --> 00:11:35,552 Shabooya roll call! Shabooya yaya, shabooya roll call! 253 00:11:35,630 --> 00:11:37,234 My name is Pam Yeah? 254 00:11:37,310 --> 00:11:38,914 I like to paint Yeah? 255 00:11:38,990 --> 00:11:40,435 You think you're better? Yeah? 256 00:11:40,510 --> 00:11:41,511 Oh, no, you ain't! 257 00:11:41,590 --> 00:11:42,591 Roll call! 258 00:11:42,710 --> 00:11:45,759 Shabooya yaya Shabooya roll call! 259 00:11:46,070 --> 00:11:49,153 Shabooya yaya Shabooya roll call! 260 00:11:49,270 --> 00:11:50,840 My name is Kevin Yeah? 261 00:11:50,950 --> 00:11:52,395 That is my name Yeah? 262 00:11:52,510 --> 00:11:54,433 They call me Kevin Yeah? 263 00:11:54,510 --> 00:11:55,557 'Cause that's my name 264 00:11:55,630 --> 00:11:56,631 Roll call! 265 00:11:56,710 --> 00:11:59,919 Shabooya yaya Shabooya roll call! 266 00:12:00,150 --> 00:12:03,359 Shabooya yaya Shabooya roll call! 267 00:12:12,470 --> 00:12:15,235 Thanks. Playing a little hookey from work today. 268 00:12:18,350 --> 00:12:19,681 Oh, my God! 269 00:12:21,510 --> 00:12:24,241 Dunder Mifflin road trip 2012! 270 00:12:24,310 --> 00:12:26,961 Okay, now a serious one. 271 00:12:28,510 --> 00:12:30,319 Hey, where's Dwight? He should be a part of this. 272 00:12:32,790 --> 00:12:34,713 Has he been acting kind of weird to you lately? 273 00:12:34,950 --> 00:12:37,430 If by lately you mean for the last 12 years, yeah. 274 00:12:37,510 --> 00:12:39,114 No, I mean he's sulking. That's not like him. 275 00:12:39,190 --> 00:12:40,874 He's just mad that we're all having fun. 276 00:12:41,390 --> 00:12:43,916 Then why isn't he scheming? Or preparing to avenge? 277 00:12:45,590 --> 00:12:47,877 He's fine. He's indestructible. 278 00:12:49,910 --> 00:12:51,958 Always say that a child is "placed" 279 00:12:52,070 --> 00:12:54,311 for adoption, never "surrendered." 280 00:12:55,110 --> 00:12:56,236 We're not hostages. 281 00:12:57,390 --> 00:12:59,392 Although, I have considered kidnapping one. 282 00:13:00,390 --> 00:13:01,391 And never say that. 283 00:13:04,070 --> 00:13:07,677 I am so excited thinking about this child that you're going to adopt. 284 00:13:07,750 --> 00:13:09,798 I wish I could just wave a magic wand and 285 00:13:09,870 --> 00:13:11,998 make you a parentless five-year-old again. 286 00:13:12,070 --> 00:13:13,515 I would snap you up. 287 00:13:13,870 --> 00:13:14,871 Oh. 288 00:13:16,950 --> 00:13:19,954 Next stop, pies. Next stop, pies. 289 00:13:20,270 --> 00:13:23,080 Next stop, pies. Next stop, pies. 290 00:13:23,510 --> 00:13:25,239 Let's go, driver. 291 00:13:25,310 --> 00:13:28,439 Laverne packs up the pie wagon at 5:00, so... 292 00:13:28,750 --> 00:13:31,037 At 5:00? That's only 20 minutes from now. 293 00:13:31,710 --> 00:13:34,441 The pie shop is 13 miles away. 294 00:13:34,950 --> 00:13:38,955 So at 55 miles an hour, that just gives us five minutes to spare! 295 00:13:39,230 --> 00:13:41,039 So, wait. When pies are involved 296 00:13:41,110 --> 00:13:43,078 you can suddenly do math in your head? 297 00:13:43,150 --> 00:13:44,151 Well... 298 00:13:44,390 --> 00:13:48,236 Hold on, Kevin, how much is 19,154 pies 299 00:13:48,550 --> 00:13:50,279 divided by 61 pies? 300 00:13:51,230 --> 00:13:53,198 Three hundred and fourteen pies. 301 00:13:54,950 --> 00:13:56,440 What if it were salads? 302 00:13:56,910 --> 00:13:58,355 Well, it's the... 303 00:14:00,510 --> 00:14:03,275 Carry the four... In the... 304 00:14:03,390 --> 00:14:04,755 It doesn't work. 305 00:14:04,950 --> 00:14:07,237 I'm sorry to spoil Jim's fantastic voyage, everyone. 306 00:14:07,310 --> 00:14:08,550 But we're almost out of gas. 307 00:14:08,910 --> 00:14:11,993 Okay, well, I saw a station about a mile back, so chop-chop. 308 00:14:12,270 --> 00:14:14,671 That name brand place? No, forget about it, sorry. 309 00:14:14,750 --> 00:14:17,833 The tanks are so big on this thing, five cents a gallon extra? 310 00:14:17,990 --> 00:14:18,991 It really adds up. 311 00:14:19,110 --> 00:14:21,272 Are you kidding me? Dwight, come on! 312 00:14:21,470 --> 00:14:23,199 Hey, honey? I don't think we should push him. 313 00:14:23,270 --> 00:14:25,193 No, I'm going to push him. You know why? 314 00:14:25,270 --> 00:14:27,921 Because you're getting a pie. Why? Because you deserve it! 315 00:14:27,990 --> 00:14:30,561 And what is he doing? He's trying to drive us all around the countryside 316 00:14:30,670 --> 00:14:32,911 looking for gas, because he knows we won't get there. 317 00:14:32,990 --> 00:14:34,833 - Is that what we want? - No! 318 00:14:35,150 --> 00:14:36,959 Stop ordering me around, Jim! 319 00:14:37,150 --> 00:14:38,834 - What do we want? - Pies! 320 00:14:38,990 --> 00:14:40,674 - When do we want it? - Pies! 321 00:14:41,190 --> 00:14:42,191 Okay, fine! 322 00:14:45,030 --> 00:14:47,158 You win, Jim! You win. 323 00:14:47,270 --> 00:14:49,318 We have been battling for a long time, but you know what? 324 00:14:49,390 --> 00:14:51,597 You win, because you are the winner. You are the alpha male. 325 00:14:51,670 --> 00:14:54,355 There you go. Alpha male, go buy your wife a pie. 326 00:14:54,430 --> 00:14:56,000 Go buy the whole world a pie! 327 00:14:56,150 --> 00:14:57,675 That's impossible. 328 00:14:59,070 --> 00:15:00,196 Dwight! 329 00:15:00,270 --> 00:15:01,351 What are you doing? 330 00:15:01,590 --> 00:15:03,035 What the hell? Dwight! 331 00:15:06,110 --> 00:15:08,317 Well, now I don't even feel like pie. 332 00:15:09,510 --> 00:15:10,511 Wait. 333 00:15:11,590 --> 00:15:13,035 No, it's back. 334 00:15:15,510 --> 00:15:18,116 Oh, just drive away. Just... 335 00:15:18,190 --> 00:15:19,715 Phyllis, that's not safe. 336 00:15:19,790 --> 00:15:21,872 Guys, we only have 18 minutes left. 337 00:15:22,030 --> 00:15:25,034 At 61 miles an hour, we're just going to barely make it. 338 00:15:25,590 --> 00:15:27,115 Go up and check on him. He's upset. 339 00:15:27,190 --> 00:15:28,840 You know he's doing all this on purpose. 340 00:15:28,910 --> 00:15:31,277 Please just make sure he's okay. 341 00:15:32,470 --> 00:15:33,801 And hurry it up, for God's sake! 342 00:15:33,870 --> 00:15:35,315 They're going to be out of banana cream. 343 00:15:35,390 --> 00:15:36,516 Banana cream is the first to go. 344 00:15:36,590 --> 00:15:38,558 We'll be lucky to get pumpkin at this point. 345 00:15:38,870 --> 00:15:39,871 What? 346 00:15:41,270 --> 00:15:42,271 Dwight? 347 00:15:43,070 --> 00:15:44,481 Why are you such a jerk? 348 00:15:44,550 --> 00:15:46,393 I'm trying to do something for my wife, 349 00:15:46,470 --> 00:15:47,551 and you keep derailing... 350 00:15:47,630 --> 00:15:48,916 I'm barren, Jim. 351 00:15:50,270 --> 00:15:52,557 What? My trouser hives are void of honey. 352 00:15:53,070 --> 00:15:56,119 I had congress with Angela, and the child that she bore 353 00:15:56,190 --> 00:15:57,840 did not issue from my loins. 354 00:15:58,230 --> 00:16:01,393 I thought I would be a father and instead I am a eunuch, 355 00:16:02,230 --> 00:16:03,914 neutered by my own building. 356 00:16:05,310 --> 00:16:08,075 Is this about the popcorn, or the X on the ceiling? 357 00:16:08,750 --> 00:16:10,434 Dwight, that was a prank. 358 00:16:11,430 --> 00:16:14,036 You mean you flooded my building with dangerous electromagnetic 359 00:16:14,110 --> 00:16:16,317 radiation as a prank? No. 360 00:16:16,390 --> 00:16:18,358 That's genius. That's the best prank you've ever done. 361 00:16:18,430 --> 00:16:19,920 I'll take it. 362 00:16:23,790 --> 00:16:24,951 Andy? Who is it? 363 00:16:26,390 --> 00:16:28,392 Um, is this a good time? Yeah. 364 00:16:28,470 --> 00:16:31,792 Perfect time, right in the middle of a rooftop crisis. 365 00:16:31,950 --> 00:16:33,998 Fine, let me read it. What do we have here? 366 00:16:34,190 --> 00:16:37,160 Okay. 367 00:16:38,630 --> 00:16:41,634 You've made this very easy for me. It's unsignable. 368 00:16:42,270 --> 00:16:43,271 Oh. 369 00:16:44,270 --> 00:16:46,955 Well, is there something... It's inaccurate, dishonest, 370 00:16:47,070 --> 00:16:49,152 and in a word, dong water. 371 00:16:49,990 --> 00:16:52,038 Oh, well, perhaps I could reword some of it to... 372 00:16:52,110 --> 00:16:54,112 Here's the thing. You asked me to do you a favor. 373 00:16:54,230 --> 00:16:55,994 I did it. I read it. 374 00:16:56,070 --> 00:16:58,311 Thank you very much to me for my time. 375 00:16:59,710 --> 00:17:01,792 Good luck with your impossible dream. 376 00:17:04,310 --> 00:17:05,800 All right then. 377 00:17:15,350 --> 00:17:17,830 Dwight, sometimes it takes couples years to get pregnant. 378 00:17:17,910 --> 00:17:20,436 Really? How long did it take you and Pam to conceive? 379 00:17:20,630 --> 00:17:22,439 That doesn't matter. What position did you use to conceive? 380 00:17:22,550 --> 00:17:23,597 Okay, I'm not talking about that. 381 00:17:23,670 --> 00:17:24,717 Regular or lady-on-her-back? 382 00:17:24,790 --> 00:17:26,713 You used lady-on-her-back, didn't you, freak? 383 00:17:26,990 --> 00:17:28,515 Yuck, gross. Never mind, Jim. 384 00:17:39,350 --> 00:17:42,752 British women, famously over-emotional, am I right? 385 00:17:44,350 --> 00:17:46,512 I don't think that's Nellie. What? 386 00:17:47,590 --> 00:17:48,751 Oh. 387 00:17:48,910 --> 00:17:52,995 Oh, no, no. Look, it's all right, really. It isn't your fault. 388 00:17:53,870 --> 00:17:57,397 No, no. You were so kind, 389 00:17:57,870 --> 00:17:59,440 and it isn't anything to do with you. 390 00:18:01,150 --> 00:18:03,721 Did you ever think that because you own the building, 391 00:18:03,790 --> 00:18:07,112 everyone in it, we're all kind of like your children? 392 00:18:07,630 --> 00:18:11,555 You know there's a phrase about that in German, bildenkinder, 393 00:18:11,670 --> 00:18:13,081 used almost exclusively by childless 394 00:18:13,150 --> 00:18:14,879 landlords to console themselves. 395 00:18:15,030 --> 00:18:17,920 But now I really understand it. 396 00:18:19,350 --> 00:18:23,753 Well, now you have a bus full of real bildenkinder. 397 00:18:23,870 --> 00:18:27,158 Bildenkinder. Okay, and they're all dangerously close 398 00:18:27,230 --> 00:18:28,720 to not getting pie. 399 00:18:29,870 --> 00:18:32,191 And there's only one guy who can save them. 400 00:18:32,270 --> 00:18:34,034 It's not me. 401 00:18:34,110 --> 00:18:35,191 I agree. 402 00:18:35,310 --> 00:18:36,357 Oh. 403 00:18:37,230 --> 00:18:38,755 Hey, how did it go? 404 00:18:38,830 --> 00:18:41,310 It was pretty good, actually. We bonded, we got to talk... 405 00:18:41,870 --> 00:18:42,871 Oh. Wait, wait, wait! 406 00:18:42,950 --> 00:18:45,999 That's what happens when you don't get out of the way. 407 00:18:46,070 --> 00:18:47,276 Out of the way! 408 00:18:49,590 --> 00:18:51,319 You feel okay now? Better than okay. 409 00:18:51,430 --> 00:18:52,795 And you know what, honey? 410 00:18:52,870 --> 00:18:54,918 I'm going to get you that rhubarb pie. 411 00:18:55,150 --> 00:18:56,231 Well, actually, rhubarb is... Don't. 412 00:18:56,350 --> 00:18:57,351 the one pie that I... Don't. 413 00:18:57,430 --> 00:18:59,080 Everybody, hang on! 414 00:19:00,430 --> 00:19:01,431 Oh! 415 00:19:06,190 --> 00:19:07,680 Whoa! 416 00:19:10,590 --> 00:19:13,992 Pie! Pie! Pie! Pie! Pie! 417 00:19:25,830 --> 00:19:26,831 Oh. 418 00:19:27,270 --> 00:19:28,556 I changed my mind. 419 00:19:29,230 --> 00:19:30,914 Oh, you signed it? Yeah. 420 00:19:31,390 --> 00:19:33,233 Not as is, obviously. 421 00:19:34,230 --> 00:19:37,120 I made a couple of changes, added some sentences at the end. 422 00:19:38,710 --> 00:19:40,155 Trust me, it needed it. 423 00:19:41,550 --> 00:19:42,881 But, yeah, whatever. 424 00:19:50,470 --> 00:19:53,599 "She's tough in business, but tender with the people she cares about. 425 00:19:53,670 --> 00:19:55,911 "She'll make a wonderful mother to any child 426 00:19:55,990 --> 00:19:58,197 "who can overlook weird accents." 427 00:20:03,070 --> 00:20:05,152 I insult you, Oscar! 428 00:20:05,670 --> 00:20:06,796 What? 429 00:20:06,870 --> 00:20:09,760 I insult you, to your face! 430 00:20:10,470 --> 00:20:12,711 I don't know what you're talking about. 431 00:20:12,790 --> 00:20:15,077 Then why don't you do something about it? 432 00:20:15,550 --> 00:20:16,597 Kevin, are you trying to get me 433 00:20:16,670 --> 00:20:18,479 to hit you in the face with my pie? 434 00:20:18,910 --> 00:20:20,400 You don't have the guts, 435 00:20:20,950 --> 00:20:25,638 you stupid, dumb do-do face. 436 00:20:32,670 --> 00:20:33,671 Yes! 437 00:20:34,950 --> 00:20:37,157 Oh, my God, I'm getting so stuffed. 438 00:20:42,430 --> 00:20:43,795 We did it. 439 00:20:44,310 --> 00:20:45,721 You did it. 440 00:20:54,550 --> 00:20:56,473 My name is Andy! Yeah? 441 00:20:56,550 --> 00:20:58,518 I don't do drugs Yeah? 442 00:20:58,590 --> 00:21:00,513 Now check the style Yeah? 443 00:21:00,590 --> 00:21:01,716 Of Flatt and Scruggs! 444 00:21:01,790 --> 00:21:02,871 Yeah 445 00:21:17,750 --> 00:21:21,641 Roll call 446 00:21:21,710 --> 00:21:22,711 What? 447 00:21:23,335 --> 00:21:33,335 Someone needs to stop Clearway Law. Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.