1
00:00:01,030 --> 00:00:04,113
Uh, what else? I've seen
Dirty Dancing like, ten times...

2
00:00:04,430 --> 00:00:06,194
- Breaks my heart every time, you know?
- Whoa!

3
00:00:06,310 --> 00:00:07,516
Andy!

4
00:00:07,590 --> 00:00:09,638
That Swayze sure
can dance dirty.

5
00:00:09,910 --> 00:00:11,514
Don't you have
any sunblock?

6
00:00:11,710 --> 00:00:13,394
No, Walter J's
been hoarding it.

7
00:00:13,470 --> 00:00:15,837
If you want to worry about a part
of my body, worry about my eyes.

8
00:00:16,510 --> 00:00:18,956
They're like two flaming
meatballs in my skull.

9
00:00:19,190 --> 00:00:22,672
Last week, Andy set sail for the
Bahamas to sell his family's boat.

10
00:00:22,910 --> 00:00:24,833
And he took his
brother but not me.

11
00:00:25,510 --> 00:00:29,515
I was kind of sad at first, but then
I remembered that Bob Marley song,

12
00:00:30,070 --> 00:00:32,311
"No, woman. No cry!"

13
00:00:32,830 --> 00:00:33,877
Check this out.

14
00:00:34,830 --> 00:00:36,480
Keeps my hair
out of my stare.

15
00:00:37,030 --> 00:00:38,441
Also helps me
combat the Glare Bear.

16
00:00:38,510 --> 00:00:39,841
That's what I
call the sun now.

17
00:00:39,950 --> 00:00:42,476
Andy, it's Darryl. Take
your drawers off your head.

18
00:00:42,710 --> 00:00:45,600
What else can I show you?
Damn it!

19
00:00:47,310 --> 00:00:49,790
Oh, Andy, was that
your drinking water?

20
00:00:49,910 --> 00:00:53,073
Yeah, it was. That's okay, though.
I've got this cool

21
00:00:53,790 --> 00:00:55,315
desalinator device.

22
00:00:55,590 --> 00:00:59,276
It sucks up sea water through this
hose and pumps out fresh water.

23
00:00:59,350 --> 00:01:01,557
See? Check it out.

24
00:01:01,630 --> 00:01:02,631
Ow!

25
00:01:05,590 --> 00:01:06,671
That's not good.

26
00:01:06,750 --> 00:01:09,720
I'd better sign off.
I need to get going.

27
00:01:09,790 --> 00:01:11,440
I mean, these Skype sessions
are, like, the only thing

28
00:01:11,510 --> 00:01:13,353
that keep me sane
out here, you know?

29
00:01:18,310 --> 00:01:20,074
He's been
sailing for two days.

30
00:01:20,870 --> 00:01:24,875
I'll leave you with this, the
image of a man and his boat!

31
00:01:25,030 --> 00:01:26,714
Burn this into your brains!

32
00:01:27,230 --> 00:01:30,040
Yeah.
No. No, No!

33
00:01:31,870 --> 00:01:36,876
Andy? Andy? Andy? Andy?

34
00:01:38,030 --> 00:01:44,104
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.

35
00:01:50,430 --> 00:01:51,591
Dwight Schrute.

36
00:01:53,870 --> 00:01:55,679
Well, hi there,
David Wallace.

37
00:01:55,790 --> 00:01:58,999
Why would you ever call me when
the manager is out of town?

38
00:01:59,150 --> 00:02:01,118
Well, I have some
very exciting news.

39
00:02:01,190 --> 00:02:03,636
And you didn't call Jim.
That seems significant.

40
00:02:03,750 --> 00:02:05,912
Hi, David! Jim, good. You
should hear this, too.

41
00:02:05,990 --> 00:02:08,038
No, he shouldn't!
What? Jim!

42
00:02:08,110 --> 00:02:09,600
Go ahead, David.
I'm listening.

43
00:02:09,710 --> 00:02:11,917
I... Okay, David, I want
to take you off speaker.

44
00:02:11,990 --> 00:02:15,119
But I don't know
where I'd put you.

45
00:02:15,190 --> 00:02:16,760
Guys, listen.
This is big news.

46
00:02:17,070 --> 00:02:19,880
The Scranton White Pages just
got in contact with my office.

47
00:02:19,950 --> 00:02:22,920
They have apparently dropped their
supplier for the last ten years.

48
00:02:24,270 --> 00:02:25,271
The White Pages.

49
00:02:25,830 --> 00:02:28,037
The White Pages.
Do you want it? No.

50
00:02:28,110 --> 00:02:29,271
Do you use it? No.

51
00:02:29,390 --> 00:02:32,121
Does it inexplicably show up on
your doorstep three times a year?

52
00:02:32,190 --> 00:02:34,477
Yes, yes and yes.

53
00:02:34,550 --> 00:02:36,552
There is a reason we
in the paper industry

54
00:02:36,670 --> 00:02:38,672
call this thing
the White Whale.

55
00:02:40,710 --> 00:02:42,314
Look at all
that sweet blubber.

56
00:02:43,990 --> 00:02:45,401
Look, we need our
top salesman

57
00:02:45,470 --> 00:02:47,393
running point on this,
and Dwight, that is you.

58
00:02:48,590 --> 00:02:50,354
I'm going to need to
put you on hold for a second.

59
00:02:54,070 --> 00:02:55,799
Yeah! Whoo!

60
00:02:56,150 --> 00:02:58,915
Eat it, Jim!
Eat it, Phyllis! Eat...

61
00:02:59,950 --> 00:03:01,554
Where's Stanley?
He's in the bathroom.

62
00:03:01,790 --> 00:03:03,474
Will you run into the bathroom
and tell him to eat it?

63
00:03:03,550 --> 00:03:04,881
Of course.

64
00:03:05,750 --> 00:03:09,118
Yeah! Okay.
Hey, David, I'm back.

65
00:03:09,310 --> 00:03:10,311
Eat it, Stanley!

66
00:03:10,750 --> 00:03:14,596
So, last I remember Tom Peterman
was in charge of that account?

67
00:03:14,670 --> 00:03:16,513
No, my assistant spoke to the
receptionist over there.

68
00:03:16,590 --> 00:03:18,558
It's someone new but she
didn't catch her name.

69
00:03:19,830 --> 00:03:20,831
Her name?

70
00:03:21,070 --> 00:03:23,198
No. Hey, Dwight shouldn't...

71
00:03:23,750 --> 00:03:25,673
Thanks, David! Thank you so
much for calling me today.

72
00:03:25,750 --> 00:03:27,320
Good luck!
Good luck to you.

73
00:03:27,750 --> 00:03:28,831
Dwight, you can't go.

74
00:03:28,950 --> 00:03:31,112
You have a problem with women.
You can't sell to them.

75
00:03:31,190 --> 00:03:33,158
That's a damnable lie.
I love women.

76
00:03:33,310 --> 00:03:35,631
Gina Rogers at Apex Technology

77
00:03:36,030 --> 00:03:38,920
said you called her "Jine-a"
for your entire meeting.

78
00:03:39,030 --> 00:03:40,031
Ew.

79
00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:42,431
That's not good.

80
00:03:42,670 --> 00:03:45,071
Yeah, she said she
corrected him five times.

81
00:03:45,670 --> 00:03:46,671
"Jine-a" said that?

82
00:03:46,990 --> 00:03:48,754
Guys, we can't let
Dwight blow this!

83
00:03:48,870 --> 00:03:51,237
An account this size
could double our gross!

84
00:03:51,510 --> 00:03:53,399
That means raises, bonuses.

85
00:03:54,270 --> 00:03:55,715
Pizza Friday could come back.

86
00:03:55,830 --> 00:03:58,197
Hey, remember that week in
the '90s when we got bagels?

87
00:03:58,270 --> 00:03:59,795
I miss Clinton.

88
00:03:59,950 --> 00:04:01,031
Can you go instead?

89
00:04:01,110 --> 00:04:03,078
Can't. I have the thing.

90
00:04:04,710 --> 00:04:06,553
I have this conference call
today with this company

91
00:04:06,670 --> 00:04:07,910
in Philly
that I'm helping start.

92
00:04:07,990 --> 00:04:09,435
First board meeting.

93
00:04:10,030 --> 00:04:12,237
Also the first time I've ever
been excited about work,

94
00:04:12,590 --> 00:04:14,194
so, that feels

95
00:04:15,270 --> 00:04:16,476
wrong.

96
00:04:17,950 --> 00:04:21,159
Okay, calm down, it's
just me, not Tom Selleck.

97
00:04:22,750 --> 00:04:23,831
Nice.

98
00:04:23,910 --> 00:04:26,880
Toby got us all to
participate in Movember.

99
00:04:27,270 --> 00:04:29,238
It's a charity
for prostate cancer.

100
00:04:29,470 --> 00:04:31,234
You pledge money and
then you grow a mustache

101
00:04:31,310 --> 00:04:32,550
for the month of November.

102
00:04:32,870 --> 00:04:34,395
So, this is how
we look now.

103
00:04:34,870 --> 00:04:36,554
I hope you like being
turned on all the time.

104
00:04:38,390 --> 00:04:39,835
Damn!

105
00:04:39,910 --> 00:04:41,435
Just keeps on coming, huh?

106
00:04:41,550 --> 00:04:43,154
I have very
fertile hair glands.

107
00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:48,160
I am so glad I got all of
the dudes to do Movember.

108
00:04:48,790 --> 00:04:51,077
We have the dopest
time back in the annex.

109
00:04:51,190 --> 00:04:52,191
God.

110
00:04:52,590 --> 00:04:54,991
We even go to lunch,
pick up babes.

111
00:04:55,590 --> 00:04:57,274
Smile if you love
men's prostates!

112
00:05:01,430 --> 00:05:03,353
Hi.
Hi.

113
00:05:04,270 --> 00:05:05,601
Spring cleaning?

114
00:05:05,750 --> 00:05:07,400
More like fall cleaning.

115
00:05:10,110 --> 00:05:12,351
I think the Senator
is having an affair.

116
00:05:14,750 --> 00:05:16,275
This doesn't...

117
00:05:16,750 --> 00:05:18,400
I'm sorry, what?

118
00:05:18,590 --> 00:05:21,355
I think the Senator
is having an affair.

119
00:05:22,510 --> 00:05:26,799
I literally have nightmares in
which what just happened happens.

120
00:05:27,470 --> 00:05:28,801
I wake up in a sweat,

121
00:05:29,950 --> 00:05:32,635
and then I make Angela's
husband spoon me back to bed.

122
00:05:34,230 --> 00:05:35,720
When he comes home
in the morning,

123
00:05:35,830 --> 00:05:37,320
he has this
secret little smile.

124
00:05:37,550 --> 00:05:38,836
Aww...

125
00:05:38,910 --> 00:05:41,231
I'm sure that's nothing.

126
00:05:41,470 --> 00:05:43,598
And he's always
at the yoga studio.

127
00:05:43,830 --> 00:05:45,673
He never misses
the noon class.

128
00:05:46,350 --> 00:05:47,875
Hot Yoga with Blake.

129
00:05:48,110 --> 00:05:50,636
Angela,
Blake is also a guy's name,

130
00:05:50,790 --> 00:05:53,714
so he may be spending his
afternoons with a guy named Blake,

131
00:05:53,910 --> 00:05:55,514
so nothing to worry about.

132
00:05:57,470 --> 00:05:58,471
Huh.

133
00:05:59,350 --> 00:06:01,352
Blake. Who's Blake?

134
00:06:01,430 --> 00:06:02,431
I don't know.

135
00:06:02,550 --> 00:06:04,871
I've just never heard
about the Senator and yoga.

136
00:06:05,190 --> 00:06:06,351
Right.
From you.

137
00:06:07,590 --> 00:06:09,001
I'm sure it's
probably nothing.

138
00:06:09,510 --> 00:06:10,796
But what's with
the yoga already?

139
00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:11,917
Right?
And Blake?

140
00:06:11,990 --> 00:06:13,674
Right! All right,
Angela, calm down.

141
00:06:13,790 --> 00:06:15,918
We need to go and check this out.
What?

142
00:06:16,030 --> 00:06:17,520
Angela, I'll go with you.

143
00:06:19,590 --> 00:06:22,799
So, show us how you'd normally
sell to a female client.

144
00:06:23,150 --> 00:06:24,675
Okay, with pleasure.

145
00:06:24,790 --> 00:06:27,111
Time to learn a few
new tricks, old dog.

146
00:06:27,190 --> 00:06:28,476
You got this, Schrute.

147
00:06:28,550 --> 00:06:32,350
You've just walked
into her office and begin.

148
00:06:33,110 --> 00:06:34,350
Hello.
Hello.

149
00:06:34,430 --> 00:06:35,716
May I please
speak to your boss?

150
00:06:35,830 --> 00:06:37,195
No, she is the boss.

151
00:06:37,270 --> 00:06:38,351
I am?
Yes.

152
00:06:40,710 --> 00:06:43,031
Hi, I'm Mr. Hannon,
how can I help you?

153
00:06:43,110 --> 00:06:44,600
Okay, this isn't
working for me,

154
00:06:44,670 --> 00:06:47,514
because no one would ever believe
that she would be a boss.

155
00:06:47,590 --> 00:06:49,354
He's absolutely right,
I'm really struggling here.

156
00:06:49,470 --> 00:06:51,438
I'll be the buyer.

157
00:06:51,710 --> 00:06:52,711
Okay-

158
00:06:54,070 --> 00:06:56,471
Hello, Mr. Schrute, nice to see you.
Please have a seat.

159
00:06:56,590 --> 00:06:59,321
I never sit down
during sales meetings.

160
00:06:59,390 --> 00:07:01,552
I want to appear
aggressive and imposing.

161
00:07:01,750 --> 00:07:03,639
I am going to sell to
you in 12 minutes.

162
00:07:03,710 --> 00:07:06,998
No, actually, she'd like to take
her time discussing her needs.

163
00:07:07,150 --> 00:07:09,915
I will tell her what her needs
are and then fill them.

164
00:07:10,390 --> 00:07:12,040
This is going to
work out best for you

165
00:07:12,390 --> 00:07:14,916
if you just relax
and do nothing.

166
00:07:15,190 --> 00:07:17,716
And once I'm finished,
it's over.

167
00:07:19,070 --> 00:07:21,550
Okay, let's stop here.
Anyone have any thoughts?

168
00:07:21,630 --> 00:07:23,041
I thought it went great.

169
00:07:23,230 --> 00:07:25,312
I have written down
a few questions.

170
00:07:25,550 --> 00:07:27,712
One, have you ever
killed a woman?

171
00:07:27,910 --> 00:07:29,514
How many women
have you killed?

172
00:07:29,910 --> 00:07:31,241
Please sir,
will you not kill me?

173
00:07:35,750 --> 00:07:36,990
Okay,
let's get started.

174
00:07:37,070 --> 00:07:38,595
Okay, cool. Are we all on?

175
00:07:38,830 --> 00:07:41,640
Well, you're the only one
"on." We're all here.

176
00:07:42,830 --> 00:07:43,956
Right.

177
00:07:44,270 --> 00:07:46,591
Okay, over the next
three months, I...

178
00:07:46,670 --> 00:07:48,877
That's the winter season,
three months.

179
00:07:49,590 --> 00:07:51,991
I had some ideas actually...

180
00:07:52,070 --> 00:07:53,754
Are you at your
office right now?

181
00:07:54,190 --> 00:07:57,512
Yeah. Trust me, I would
rather be with you guys.

182
00:07:57,590 --> 00:07:59,513
Okay. Yeah,
it's sounding kind of

183
00:07:59,630 --> 00:08:01,598
spooky-sexy
over here, Halpert.

184
00:08:01,910 --> 00:08:03,275
Oh.

185
00:08:03,350 --> 00:08:05,432
Sorry. I was
saying that you should probably...

186
00:08:05,510 --> 00:08:06,796
Whoa.

187
00:08:07,110 --> 00:08:08,874
I think there's... I think
there's been a mistake.

188
00:08:08,950 --> 00:08:11,191
We're trying to reach Jim
Halpert, not Batman.

189
00:08:13,950 --> 00:08:16,237
You know what?
I should have just had...

190
00:08:16,310 --> 00:08:17,675
I should have just had you
call me on my cell.

191
00:08:17,750 --> 00:08:19,752
Yeah. I'll... I'm going to
try a different spot. Okay?

192
00:08:19,830 --> 00:08:21,320
Okay, yeah. Okay. I'll
call you right back.

193
00:08:21,470 --> 00:08:23,916
Cool. What's happening
in three months?

194
00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:26,961
Okay, when you're
selling to women,

195
00:08:27,110 --> 00:08:28,475
it is crucial that
you listen, Dwight.

196
00:08:29,590 --> 00:08:31,194
Also, you want to
respect their...

197
00:08:33,630 --> 00:08:34,791
Are you listening now?

198
00:08:35,310 --> 00:08:36,311
Yes.

199
00:08:36,670 --> 00:08:38,399
Okay, well,
you have to show us.

200
00:08:38,470 --> 00:08:41,360
That's impossible. Listening happens
in the ear and in the brain.

201
00:08:41,430 --> 00:08:43,398
I mean, some organisms
have external hairs

202
00:08:43,510 --> 00:08:45,478
that vibrate to
indicate auditory stimulation,

203
00:08:45,550 --> 00:08:49,600
but unfortunately our external
hairs don't vibrate at all.

204
00:08:49,670 --> 00:08:51,832
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

205
00:08:52,030 --> 00:08:53,475
What are you doing?

206
00:08:53,790 --> 00:08:58,239
A little smile and a nod shows
that I hear you. Got it?

207
00:08:58,510 --> 00:08:59,511
Kind of.

208
00:08:59,670 --> 00:09:00,956
Nellie,
why don't you tell Dwight

209
00:09:01,070 --> 00:09:02,310
what we were
doing earlier today,

210
00:09:02,390 --> 00:09:04,154
and Dwight, you show us
that you're listening.

211
00:09:04,510 --> 00:09:08,071
Well, we were in the warehouse
where we were discussing the mural

212
00:09:08,150 --> 00:09:10,118
that I've commissioned
Pam to paint there.

213
00:09:10,230 --> 00:09:11,800
We were talking about
the color schemes

214
00:09:11,910 --> 00:09:13,480
and the major themes
we want to hit.

215
00:09:13,670 --> 00:09:16,116
Children of the world
coming together,

216
00:09:16,270 --> 00:09:18,750
cutting down trees
to make paper,

217
00:09:19,310 --> 00:09:21,358
but not in
a child labor-y way.

218
00:09:21,830 --> 00:09:24,879
It's just up and down, just a
regular nod, like a person.

219
00:09:24,990 --> 00:09:26,151
I am a person.

220
00:09:26,230 --> 00:09:27,231
Yes. Yeah.

221
00:09:27,310 --> 00:09:29,199
Of course. You're a person.
We can do this. All right?

222
00:09:29,470 --> 00:09:31,120
And then we thought we'd...

223
00:09:31,670 --> 00:09:33,957
I can't. I just, I can't carry
on with that face. Look at it.

224
00:09:34,030 --> 00:09:35,634
I'm going to get
nightmares with that face.

225
00:09:36,070 --> 00:09:38,277
I mean, he looks like
he's laboring over

226
00:09:38,390 --> 00:09:40,677
a stool having just
eaten human flesh.

227
00:09:40,950 --> 00:09:42,031
That's a bit extreme.

228
00:09:42,190 --> 00:09:43,271
Yeah, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, but that is true.

229
00:09:43,350 --> 00:09:45,352
He's screwed! The meeting
is in less than an hour.

230
00:09:45,630 --> 00:09:48,998
All right, God, Dwight, just
ignore every instinct you have.

231
00:09:49,070 --> 00:09:50,720
It's all garbage. Okay?

232
00:09:51,070 --> 00:09:53,880
You're the woman,
I'm the salesman.

233
00:09:53,950 --> 00:09:55,998
Watch what I do
and try to learn.

234
00:09:56,390 --> 00:09:58,597
Okay, I'm the woman. I'm a woman. Good?

235
00:09:58,870 --> 00:09:59,871
No.

236
00:10:00,510 --> 00:10:02,797
Ms. Thomas!
So good to see you.

237
00:10:03,230 --> 00:10:04,470
Hello.

238
00:10:04,590 --> 00:10:05,830
Are those your kids?
They're so cute.

239
00:10:05,910 --> 00:10:07,071
They could be models.

240
00:10:07,190 --> 00:10:08,954
Thank you.
I'm so proud of them.

241
00:10:09,430 --> 00:10:13,151
I carried each one of them for
nine months inside of my torso

242
00:10:13,230 --> 00:10:15,039
and then pushed
them out of my vagina.

243
00:10:15,110 --> 00:10:17,238
Boo. Weird.

244
00:10:17,310 --> 00:10:21,031
Okay, well, this is a lost cause.
He's hopeless.

245
00:10:21,110 --> 00:10:25,434
Ten years ago I didn't care if Dwight got
married or died a beet farming bachelor.

246
00:10:26,310 --> 00:10:28,153
But having kids
makes you so soft.

247
00:10:28,950 --> 00:10:31,237
I used to watch Pulp Fiction
and laugh, and now I'm like,

248
00:10:31,310 --> 00:10:33,631
that poor Gimp
is somebody's child.

249
00:10:35,510 --> 00:10:37,638
You know, I think there
could be a lot of benefits

250
00:10:37,710 --> 00:10:39,041
if you could learn to
get along with women.

251
00:10:39,470 --> 00:10:40,960
I have no problem with women.

252
00:10:41,030 --> 00:10:43,078
It's business women
and their...

253
00:10:43,190 --> 00:10:45,955
Their power suits
and their shoulder pads.

254
00:10:46,070 --> 00:10:47,834
Don't lie about
your shoulders!

255
00:10:48,190 --> 00:10:49,476
Dwight, listen to me.

256
00:10:49,830 --> 00:10:53,960
Business women are just normal,
nice, reasonable people.

257
00:10:54,190 --> 00:10:56,955
Who's a nice, reasonable
person, in your experience?

258
00:10:58,550 --> 00:11:01,235
I had a barber once who used
to comb my hair gently.

259
00:11:01,790 --> 00:11:04,111
Okay. So, when you're
selling to this woman,

260
00:11:04,190 --> 00:11:06,511
just imagine she's that nice,
reasonable barber.

261
00:11:07,550 --> 00:11:09,279
Okay. I can do that.

262
00:11:09,350 --> 00:11:10,795
Good. Baby steps.

263
00:11:10,950 --> 00:11:12,679
He used to fight dogs.

264
00:11:14,270 --> 00:11:18,719
Like, he used to make dogs fight,
or he actually fought dogs?

265
00:11:19,110 --> 00:11:20,555
Little of this,
little of that.

266
00:11:23,670 --> 00:11:25,240
Which one is
the instructor?

267
00:11:25,590 --> 00:11:26,876
They're all fatties.

268
00:11:27,790 --> 00:11:29,713
Angela. Angela.
What? Where?

269
00:11:30,590 --> 00:11:31,637
The stairs,
the stairs.

270
00:11:31,750 --> 00:11:32,797
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.

271
00:11:33,310 --> 00:11:35,995
So wait, Blake is a her.

272
00:11:36,510 --> 00:11:38,319
Oh, my God!

273
00:11:38,590 --> 00:11:40,752
She's so stunningly tiny.

274
00:11:40,990 --> 00:11:43,994
She's like a petite double
zero, for sure. For sure.

275
00:11:44,830 --> 00:11:47,310
Holy cow,
look at what they're doing.

276
00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:50,356
She's repositioning his hips
for Downward Facing Dog.

277
00:11:50,590 --> 00:11:52,672
I've heard of this.

278
00:11:53,030 --> 00:11:54,031
Dog style!

279
00:11:55,230 --> 00:11:57,153
Wait! Look, Oscar!

280
00:11:57,510 --> 00:11:59,160
Thumbelina has a boyfriend.

281
00:11:59,350 --> 00:12:01,637
And he has a ponytail. Ew.

282
00:12:01,910 --> 00:12:03,753
I'd like to see
that run for office.

283
00:12:03,990 --> 00:12:07,199
Oscar, you were right, I had
nothing to be worried about.

284
00:12:07,550 --> 00:12:09,314
Thank you.
Let's go, let's go.

285
00:12:09,950 --> 00:12:12,317
Shut up. Hold on. Hold on.
Hold on. Just, sorry.

286
00:12:13,790 --> 00:12:14,871
Look.

287
00:12:18,350 --> 00:12:20,717
This is fun.
You know?

288
00:12:21,390 --> 00:12:23,040
I mean, this is fun.

289
00:12:23,870 --> 00:12:25,793
What I was saying
is the genius of

290
00:12:25,910 --> 00:12:27,878
Air Jordan was not in
the market saturation,

291
00:12:27,990 --> 00:12:29,594
it was...

292
00:12:30,030 --> 00:12:31,998
It was what?
Sorry...

293
00:12:32,070 --> 00:12:33,560
Jim we're having a lot
of trouble hearing you.

294
00:12:33,590 --> 00:12:37,436
The... What I was saying is, the real
genius was in the...

295
00:12:38,030 --> 00:12:40,112
Hey! Are those
skateboarders back?

296
00:12:40,190 --> 00:12:41,351
Jim? Jim, are you there?

297
00:12:41,470 --> 00:12:42,551
Where are they?

298
00:12:42,630 --> 00:12:44,120
The little punks!

299
00:12:44,270 --> 00:12:45,760
It was in
the authentic design, right?

300
00:12:45,830 --> 00:12:46,797
So, I mean,
you really felt like

301
00:12:46,870 --> 00:12:47,951
Michael Jordan was wearing
these shoes for...

302
00:12:48,030 --> 00:12:50,317
Jim, who's messing with my van?
Nobody.

303
00:12:50,390 --> 00:12:52,074
Jordan wore them for nobody?

304
00:12:52,150 --> 00:12:54,278
No, no. We're not
following you, Halpert.

305
00:12:54,550 --> 00:12:56,837
This ends now!

306
00:12:58,390 --> 00:13:00,631
Have a seat.
She will be right in.

307
00:13:00,710 --> 00:13:03,236
Great. I'm sorry, do you
mind telling me her name?

308
00:13:03,310 --> 00:13:04,994
I realize we don't have it.

309
00:13:07,110 --> 00:13:08,350
Uh, she'll be right in.

310
00:13:08,430 --> 00:13:09,795
Okay, great.
She'll...

311
00:13:09,870 --> 00:13:10,951
Okay-

312
00:13:11,750 --> 00:13:14,754
Just a little off the top,
and then a nice combing.

313
00:13:16,470 --> 00:13:18,916
Yeah. Just comb it.

314
00:13:27,270 --> 00:13:29,034
Oh, my God.

315
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:31,311
It's Jan.

316
00:13:32,350 --> 00:13:34,591
Dear God in heaven.

317
00:13:38,070 --> 00:13:39,834
Jan used to be
one of my superiors,

318
00:13:39,950 --> 00:13:41,873
and she is one of
the most erratic

319
00:13:41,990 --> 00:13:43,958
and terrifying people
I have ever met.

320
00:13:46,790 --> 00:13:48,952
You son of a bitch! You're firing me?
I answered you...

321
00:13:49,230 --> 00:13:50,641
Where the hell do you get off?

322
00:13:50,910 --> 00:13:53,834
Jim and I are pretty sure she had
an affair with her ex-assistant, Hunter.

323
00:13:53,950 --> 00:13:54,951
He was 17.

324
00:13:55,590 --> 00:13:56,637
But she looks great!

325
00:13:57,830 --> 00:13:59,480
If she asks, will you
tell her I said that?

326
00:14:00,830 --> 00:14:02,400
Forget
everything we taught you!

327
00:14:07,830 --> 00:14:10,310
Hey, Jan!
It's so great to see you.

328
00:14:10,390 --> 00:14:11,994
Where's Wallace?
What?

329
00:14:12,230 --> 00:14:14,358
I was under the impression
David Wallace would be coming.

330
00:14:14,430 --> 00:14:15,841
He bought back
Dunder Mifflin, correct?

331
00:14:16,030 --> 00:14:17,031
Hey!

332
00:14:18,350 --> 00:14:20,512
Your daughter could
be a bubble bath model.

333
00:14:20,790 --> 00:14:22,872
I could just
bite her head off.

334
00:14:24,470 --> 00:14:26,154
Sorry.

335
00:14:26,710 --> 00:14:28,155
David is in Vermont.

336
00:14:28,230 --> 00:14:30,437
Did you speak with him?
He sent Dwight instead.

337
00:14:30,670 --> 00:14:31,671
Molly!

338
00:14:33,230 --> 00:14:35,312
David Wallace
is in Vermont.

339
00:14:35,670 --> 00:14:37,672
Oh, my God.
I talked to his assistant,

340
00:14:37,830 --> 00:14:39,832
and I guess it did
get a little confusing

341
00:14:39,910 --> 00:14:41,799
because you said not
to tell anyone your name.

342
00:14:41,910 --> 00:14:44,675
And then also, these Bluetooths
are very hard to hear with.

343
00:14:44,750 --> 00:14:45,876
I know you love
the way they look,

344
00:14:45,950 --> 00:14:47,156
but Tom never had
us use them, so...

345
00:14:47,270 --> 00:14:50,831
Molly? I am not Tom. I am Jan.

346
00:14:51,510 --> 00:14:52,841
I'm so sorry, Jan.

347
00:14:56,870 --> 00:14:58,315
Anyway-

348
00:14:58,870 --> 00:15:03,273
Thought it would be fun to
have a little chat with

349
00:15:03,350 --> 00:15:05,352
David Wallace
after all these years.

350
00:15:06,070 --> 00:15:07,834
Oh, Well.

351
00:15:10,710 --> 00:15:12,474
What are you doing?
Listening.

352
00:15:12,710 --> 00:15:13,711
- Stop.
- Sorry.

353
00:15:13,790 --> 00:15:14,996
Stop that.
Okay.

354
00:15:16,910 --> 00:15:20,756
So, this was all just a trick? You don't
really have any business to give?

355
00:15:21,350 --> 00:15:22,954
No, I do.

356
00:15:23,150 --> 00:15:24,640
But not to us.

357
00:15:24,750 --> 00:15:26,195
Insightful, Pam.

358
00:15:27,030 --> 00:15:30,318
You did good, Dwight. It's okay.
Seriously, Jan's not normal.

359
00:15:30,390 --> 00:15:32,631
Let's just go. She's not
going to sell to us.

360
00:15:33,630 --> 00:15:35,155
Yes, she is.

361
00:15:35,950 --> 00:15:37,952
Now, I may not have
any instincts with women,

362
00:15:38,070 --> 00:15:39,959
butlhave
an instinct for sales.

363
00:15:40,110 --> 00:15:41,794
You keep her occupied,
I'll be right back.

364
00:15:42,030 --> 00:15:43,191
What?

365
00:15:44,030 --> 00:15:45,031
Pam.
Yeah?

366
00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:46,475
I'm a very
busy woman, so...

367
00:15:46,550 --> 00:15:49,713
Yeah, do you have any
other pictures of Astrid?

368
00:15:50,910 --> 00:15:53,754
Fine, I will show you
one slideshow.

369
00:15:56,270 --> 00:15:57,476
Erin, did this call come...

370
00:15:58,350 --> 00:16:00,352
Sorry. I just...
I saw your face.

371
00:16:00,430 --> 00:16:01,431
Oh.

372
00:16:01,830 --> 00:16:02,911
I'm sorry.
It's for the thing.

373
00:16:03,070 --> 00:16:04,196
I know. That's great.

374
00:16:04,510 --> 00:16:06,319
It just, it makes it look
like there's an eyebrow

375
00:16:06,430 --> 00:16:07,761
in the middle of your face.

376
00:16:07,950 --> 00:16:08,997
Wow.

377
00:16:09,070 --> 00:16:13,359
A handsome eyebrow! But it makes
your mouth look like an eye socket.

378
00:16:13,430 --> 00:16:14,431
Which isn't bad!

379
00:16:14,590 --> 00:16:16,797
Uh-huh. But you look
like a cyclops

380
00:16:17,430 --> 00:16:19,910
whose eye fell out.

381
00:16:20,750 --> 00:16:23,515
Which is great.
It's such a great cause.

382
00:16:25,110 --> 00:16:26,191
Yeah.

383
00:16:30,990 --> 00:16:34,790
Mommy, you're a princess

384
00:16:34,950 --> 00:16:39,319
Mommy, you're a superstar

385
00:16:39,430 --> 00:16:43,560
Mommy, you're the greatest

386
00:16:43,630 --> 00:16:45,792
How can I ever
fill your shoes?

387
00:16:51,590 --> 00:16:54,241
Your voice is
as lovely as ever.

388
00:16:54,310 --> 00:16:55,311
Oh...

389
00:16:55,390 --> 00:16:57,711
And it is so cute
how she signs her name.

390
00:16:57,790 --> 00:17:00,521
That was... That was me, too.

391
00:17:00,750 --> 00:17:04,357
Okay. It's just, that's how Cece
does it, with the backwards Es.

392
00:17:04,630 --> 00:17:05,870
Cece can't spell her name?

393
00:17:06,030 --> 00:17:07,316
Actually, she can.

394
00:17:07,390 --> 00:17:08,915
Well, it's not really much
of a comparison, is it?

395
00:17:08,990 --> 00:17:11,596
I mean, "Cece" is two
letters, and "Astrid" is...

396
00:17:11,750 --> 00:17:15,550
I mean, there's even some
adults who can't spell it.

397
00:17:15,630 --> 00:17:16,995
Of course.
Can you spell it?

398
00:17:18,670 --> 00:17:19,831
Try to spell it, Pam.

399
00:17:20,070 --> 00:17:21,071
Um...

400
00:17:21,310 --> 00:17:22,311
"A,"

401
00:17:23,830 --> 00:17:25,992
"X"? I don't...
You got me.

402
00:17:27,550 --> 00:17:28,551
Don't patronize me.

403
00:17:28,870 --> 00:17:31,396
I'm so sorry. I hate this.
You're better.

404
00:17:31,950 --> 00:17:33,759
Okay, we should go now.
Let's go.

405
00:17:33,830 --> 00:17:37,437
Wait, just... Just
waitjust a minute. Just watch.

406
00:17:43,350 --> 00:17:47,116
Wait, why are you... Oh. Are you
getting your jollies right now?

407
00:17:47,710 --> 00:17:49,394
Can't get enough
of the show?

408
00:17:49,830 --> 00:17:51,116
Your jollies
are all on fire.

409
00:17:51,190 --> 00:17:53,875
Please! It's Robert
who's enjoying it!

410
00:17:54,030 --> 00:17:55,111
What?

411
00:17:55,310 --> 00:17:56,960
This could be the affair
that you're scared of.

412
00:17:57,030 --> 00:17:58,520
Politicians are
wonderful liars.

413
00:17:58,710 --> 00:18:00,200
You never know
who they really are.

414
00:18:04,470 --> 00:18:07,553
But he's probably not gay.
He's straight.

415
00:18:08,350 --> 00:18:09,715
He's straight, so...

416
00:18:14,230 --> 00:18:16,597
Excuse me, could I get
some more water? No.

417
00:18:18,030 --> 00:18:21,477
Jan, you thought I had no
more cards left to play.

418
00:18:21,550 --> 00:18:23,393
Well, I've got one.
Man-Boy!

419
00:18:24,630 --> 00:18:26,712
The Ace of Babes.

420
00:18:26,830 --> 00:18:27,831
Oh, my God.

421
00:18:27,910 --> 00:18:28,991
Where's the Quiznos?

422
00:18:30,270 --> 00:18:32,511
You're the Quiznos.

423
00:18:32,630 --> 00:18:34,758
Jan, may I introduce
to you,

424
00:18:34,870 --> 00:18:37,157
your own personal
Dunder Mifflin liaison,

425
00:18:37,310 --> 00:18:41,679
devoted to servicing this account
with total client satisfaction.

426
00:18:41,910 --> 00:18:43,833
I sense that Molly

427
00:18:44,110 --> 00:18:46,590
wasn't quite
meeting your needs.

428
00:18:47,350 --> 00:18:50,911
Nothing like
your old assistant.

429
00:18:51,910 --> 00:18:53,594
Hunter,
was that his name?

430
00:18:55,230 --> 00:18:59,599
I... I don't recall.
And yes, Molly is crap.

431
00:18:59,750 --> 00:19:01,912
Okay, you do not
have to do this.

432
00:19:02,510 --> 00:19:04,478
Do what? Get into sales?
That's what I want.

433
00:19:05,870 --> 00:19:08,680
He's been growing
that mustache for weeks.

434
00:19:09,310 --> 00:19:10,311
Best he can do.

435
00:19:11,070 --> 00:19:12,401
So young.

436
00:19:14,750 --> 00:19:16,240
Will you...

437
00:19:16,310 --> 00:19:19,120
You. Can you
turn around for me, please?

438
00:19:22,070 --> 00:19:24,232
Dwight, you can go. I will
call you in a week or so

439
00:19:24,310 --> 00:19:26,199
and let you know whether
I want your business.

440
00:19:26,270 --> 00:19:27,271
Thank you.
Very good.

441
00:19:30,990 --> 00:19:32,640
Do you have
a valid passport?

442
00:19:36,950 --> 00:19:37,951
Jim Halpert.

443
00:19:38,110 --> 00:19:39,111
Hey, it's Colin.

444
00:19:39,190 --> 00:19:41,841
Hey, man.
lam so sorry about that.

445
00:19:41,990 --> 00:19:43,799
No, don't worry about it.

446
00:19:44,590 --> 00:19:46,991
It's just,
it's not totally working.

447
00:19:47,150 --> 00:19:50,996
Yeah, no, I know. This whole
telecommuting thing, not ideal.

448
00:19:51,070 --> 00:19:52,276
But don't worry,
I'll figure it out.

449
00:19:52,350 --> 00:19:55,991
Yeah, it's not just not ideal.
I mean, with you there,

450
00:19:56,070 --> 00:19:57,959
I don't know how
we're going to do this.

451
00:20:01,270 --> 00:20:02,999
What does...
What does that mean?

452
00:20:04,350 --> 00:20:06,318
Oscar, what is
happening here?

453
00:20:06,470 --> 00:20:08,996
Why would you say you think
the Senator might be gay?

454
00:20:09,070 --> 00:20:11,311
I don't know, Angela.
I'm dehydrated.

455
00:20:11,670 --> 00:20:14,560
Maybe you heard me wrong.
We should just go.

456
00:20:15,430 --> 00:20:17,717
Look, look, here he comes! Here he comes.
He's coming, he's coming.

457
00:20:21,590 --> 00:20:23,592
What is he doing? He's
making a phone call.

458
00:20:41,350 --> 00:20:44,433
Hey, Molly.
You should just quit.

459
00:20:44,590 --> 00:20:45,591
Yeah.
Yeah.

460
00:20:45,710 --> 00:20:46,711
Thanks.

461
00:20:47,710 --> 00:20:49,155
Oh, and Molly?

462
00:20:49,870 --> 00:20:53,636
I know it can't be easy working for Jan.
Good luck with your feelings.

463
00:20:56,950 --> 00:21:00,113
Dwight!
That was really nice.

464
00:21:00,470 --> 00:21:02,393
You should ask
for her number.

465
00:21:02,630 --> 00:21:03,836
I got her number.

466
00:21:04,670 --> 00:21:06,274
Four-one-five-Y-C-L.

467
00:21:06,830 --> 00:21:07,991
That's a license number?

468
00:21:08,150 --> 00:21:09,311
That's all you need.

469
00:21:09,390 --> 00:21:13,111
And when I have curried favor
with her, I will let you know.

470
00:21:13,870 --> 00:21:15,235
Why me?

471
00:21:15,310 --> 00:21:18,280
Because you are my friend
and you are a woman.

472
00:21:19,710 --> 00:21:23,317
And women love gossip.
It's like air to you people.

473
00:21:23,390 --> 00:21:26,394
Ugh. God!

474
00:21:27,335 --> 00:21:37,335
Someone needs to stop Clearway Law.
Public shouldn't leave reviews for lawyers.