1 00:00:01,157 --> 00:00:03,458 Today we are welcoming a delegation 2 00:00:03,480 --> 00:00:06,312 from the Parks Department of our sister city, 3 00:00:06,382 --> 00:00:08,646 Boraqua, Venezuela. 4 00:00:08,718 --> 00:00:11,778 Our photo-op with the mayor is tomorrow at 3:00 p.m. 5 00:00:11,854 --> 00:00:15,517 So, I'm gonna need your suggestions about my wardrobe ASAP: 6 00:00:15,591 --> 00:00:18,081 I told you, gold sequin sweatpants. 7 00:00:18,160 --> 00:00:22,654 Also, remember, everyone, Venezuela is a poor country. 8 00:00:23,131 --> 00:00:25,224 These men are not used to the wealth 9 00:00:25,300 --> 00:00:28,029 and flash that we have here in central Indiana. 10 00:00:28,669 --> 00:00:30,762 Our only job over the next two days 11 00:00:30,838 --> 00:00:32,601 is to make these men feel at home. 12 00:00:32,673 --> 00:00:34,766 Yes, I am a little nervous. 13 00:00:35,309 --> 00:00:38,141 Pawnee has kind of a tricky history 14 00:00:38,211 --> 00:00:39,974 with welcoming foreign visitors. 15 00:00:42,148 --> 00:00:43,615 But things have changed. 16 00:00:43,683 --> 00:00:46,651 Our guests are gonna stay in a motel, for sure. 17 00:00:48,020 --> 00:00:54,094 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 18 00:01:08,939 --> 00:01:10,804 Oh, God! What if they don't speak English? 19 00:01:10,874 --> 00:01:12,933 April, you know Spanish, right? 20 00:01:17,680 --> 00:01:19,443 Oh, good. Excellent. 21 00:01:19,849 --> 00:01:23,649 My mom's Puerto Rican. That's why I'm so lively and colorful. 22 00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:27,683 Oh, my God. Here they are. Okay, everybody, clean up. 23 00:01:28,089 --> 00:01:31,889 Pull your thing up. Everyone, just be... Good. Jerry, hit it. 24 00:01:34,229 --> 00:01:37,288 This is my baby. I've put this whole trip together, 25 00:01:37,364 --> 00:01:38,626 and let me tell you something. 26 00:01:38,699 --> 00:01:39,825 It's not been easy, you know? 27 00:01:39,900 --> 00:01:43,802 How do you fit all of Pawnee in a 48-hour visit? 28 00:01:44,338 --> 00:01:46,362 I had to drop the Rock and Roll bowling alley 29 00:01:46,439 --> 00:01:48,407 from our itinerary. 30 00:01:50,409 --> 00:01:53,139 That was one of the most difficult phone calls I've ever had to make. 31 00:01:53,546 --> 00:01:56,912 Hello, most excellent representatives of the great Parks Department 32 00:01:56,982 --> 00:01:58,472 of Boraqua, Venezuela. 33 00:01:58,550 --> 00:02:00,848 I am Deputy Director of Parks and Recreation, 34 00:02:00,919 --> 00:02:02,614 and Chairwoman of the Departmental Ad-Hoc 35 00:02:02,687 --> 00:02:05,746 Sub-Committee for Pit Beautification, Leslie Knope. 36 00:02:05,823 --> 00:02:07,120 It's a pleasure to meet you. 37 00:02:07,191 --> 00:02:10,854 I'm Vice-Director Ejecutivo del Diputado del Departamento de Parques, 38 00:02:10,928 --> 00:02:13,897 Raul Alejandro Bastilla Pedro de Veloso de Maldonado. 39 00:02:14,398 --> 00:02:15,921 I'm Tom. 40 00:02:15,999 --> 00:02:20,527 These are my colleagues, Antonio Rivera-Fonseca, Minister of Small Fountains. 41 00:02:20,603 --> 00:02:24,095 And Elvis Correja, Administrator of Hedges. 42 00:02:24,174 --> 00:02:25,572 And he is? 43 00:02:25,597 --> 00:02:26,858 Pay no attention to him. 44 00:02:26,927 --> 00:02:29,402 He's our intern, Johnny. He is worthless. 45 00:02:29,777 --> 00:02:31,446 We are quite tired from our trip. 46 00:02:31,513 --> 00:02:33,947 Could you have your servant collect our bags, please? 47 00:02:34,016 --> 00:02:35,522 - What'd he call me? - Tom, please. 48 00:02:35,550 --> 00:02:38,178 It's a different culture, okay? Just be a good host. Do this for me? 49 00:02:38,252 --> 00:02:39,310 Fine. 50 00:02:39,387 --> 00:02:41,618 Yes. We will get our pathetic servant boy 51 00:02:41,656 --> 00:02:43,817 to fetch your luggage. Go, boy! 52 00:02:45,025 --> 00:02:47,357 Now, I know you gentlemen had a long flight, 53 00:02:47,427 --> 00:02:50,123 but I have prepared a welcome party in your honor. 54 00:02:50,197 --> 00:02:52,188 Excellent. I like to party. 55 00:02:52,465 --> 00:02:54,694 Well, my job is to see to your every need. 56 00:02:55,334 --> 00:02:58,360 Do we just select the woman we desire? 57 00:02:59,772 --> 00:03:01,831 I will take the large black one. 58 00:03:01,907 --> 00:03:03,374 - Interesting choice. - What? 59 00:03:03,442 --> 00:03:06,638 Do you have some kind of book with photos of the women available to us? 60 00:03:06,711 --> 00:03:09,958 If not, I will also take the sexy black one. 61 00:03:10,915 --> 00:03:14,077 I am not surprised at all. I've been to South America. 62 00:03:14,151 --> 00:03:16,051 I did very well there. 63 00:03:16,553 --> 00:03:18,487 I think there might've been a translation problem. 64 00:03:18,555 --> 00:03:22,651 When I said party, I meant one that did not include sex for pay. 65 00:03:22,726 --> 00:03:25,751 But one that had food and drink and dancing, that sort of thing. 66 00:03:26,963 --> 00:03:28,260 So, no women? 67 00:03:28,331 --> 00:03:29,593 No. 68 00:03:30,633 --> 00:03:32,692 Off to kind of a weird start. 69 00:03:33,436 --> 00:03:35,562 We have so much to learn from each other. 70 00:03:35,637 --> 00:03:37,730 What kind of birds do you guys eat? 71 00:03:37,806 --> 00:03:39,273 Chickens. 72 00:03:39,341 --> 00:03:41,206 Us, too! Amazing. 73 00:03:42,344 --> 00:03:43,435 What is this? 74 00:03:43,510 --> 00:03:46,536 Water, I'm sorry. Agua. 75 00:03:46,614 --> 00:03:49,481 In our country, government officials drink only bottled water. 76 00:03:49,550 --> 00:03:51,950 I can assure you that that water's very safe to drink. 77 00:03:52,019 --> 00:03:55,476 No. Bottled, please. Send the boy. 78 00:03:56,222 --> 00:03:57,712 Tom, go get water. 79 00:03:57,790 --> 00:03:59,223 Leslie, come on! 80 00:03:59,292 --> 00:04:00,759 For your troubles. 81 00:04:02,562 --> 00:04:03,653 You got it, Chief. 82 00:04:17,041 --> 00:04:18,872 Hey, April, can you help me out a second... 83 00:04:18,943 --> 00:04:20,808 Go away, Jerry. 84 00:04:20,878 --> 00:04:21,970 Okay. 85 00:04:29,386 --> 00:04:32,946 This is a gold plated replica of the gun Hugo Chavez used 86 00:04:33,022 --> 00:04:36,219 in the 1992 Socialist revolution. 87 00:04:36,292 --> 00:04:37,486 It is a gift. 88 00:04:37,559 --> 00:04:43,019 This gun truly symbolizes the blossoming peace between our two nations. 89 00:04:45,033 --> 00:04:47,365 A key aspect to diplomacy is gift-giving. 90 00:04:47,435 --> 00:04:50,836 The gift has to be nice enough to honor and respect the guest, 91 00:04:50,905 --> 00:04:53,270 but not so nice that it shames him. 92 00:04:53,340 --> 00:04:55,433 Plus, it needs to represent the local culture. 93 00:04:55,509 --> 00:04:57,534 And I found the perfect thing. 94 00:04:57,811 --> 00:05:01,303 A bottle of high-fructose corn syrup, 95 00:05:01,381 --> 00:05:04,008 made right here in Pawnee's own Sweetums factory. 96 00:05:04,083 --> 00:05:07,575 Sweetums! If you can't beat 'em, Sweetums! Since 1891. 97 00:05:07,653 --> 00:05:12,851 And eight and a half dozen rubber baby bottle nipples, also made here in Pawnee. 98 00:05:13,391 --> 00:05:16,952 Kernston's Rubber Nipples, tastes like the real thing. 99 00:05:23,467 --> 00:05:26,800 Yes. And we too are pleased to be here in your dirty alleyway. 100 00:05:27,604 --> 00:05:31,438 We thank you for the container of sap, and the bag of garbage. 101 00:05:31,909 --> 00:05:36,072 His English isn't perfect, so I don't think he realizes how insulting he's being. 102 00:05:36,145 --> 00:05:39,706 We're also sister cities with Kaesong, North Korea. 103 00:05:39,782 --> 00:05:42,079 Their town is far nicer. 104 00:05:42,150 --> 00:05:44,414 That's fine, it's my job. I'm a diplomat. 105 00:05:44,486 --> 00:05:46,511 I'm not supposed to take it personally. 106 00:05:46,788 --> 00:05:49,689 We haven't been here for a very long time, but what we have seen is, 107 00:05:49,758 --> 00:05:52,692 really, from the bottom of our hearts, truly depressing. 108 00:05:52,760 --> 00:05:54,193 Really, really sad stuff. 109 00:05:54,261 --> 00:05:56,695 I mean, that's why people respect Hillary Clinton so much. 110 00:05:56,764 --> 00:05:58,959 'Cause, nobody takes a punch like her. 111 00:05:59,033 --> 00:06:02,934 She's the strongest, smartest punching bag in the world. 112 00:06:03,036 --> 00:06:06,028 It's funny because Antonio said to me, "Can we turn this car around 113 00:06:06,106 --> 00:06:09,371 "and say we're sick or something, or that we lost our way?" 114 00:06:09,442 --> 00:06:12,239 Of course, that would be rude to you. 115 00:06:14,697 --> 00:06:15,959 What is your profession? 116 00:06:16,031 --> 00:06:17,794 I'm a city planner. 117 00:06:18,534 --> 00:06:19,694 This city was planned? 118 00:06:20,970 --> 00:06:24,200 On the drive in, I saw a tattoo parlor, next to a school 119 00:06:24,272 --> 00:06:25,830 next to a Taco Bell. 120 00:06:25,907 --> 00:06:28,467 It looks like it was designed by a very stupid rodent. 121 00:06:29,043 --> 00:06:30,567 He's actually a pretty smart rodent. 122 00:06:30,645 --> 00:06:32,544 - Uh-oh! - Ah! 123 00:06:33,280 --> 00:06:35,714 You have a quick wit. 124 00:06:35,782 --> 00:06:37,079 You know what? I've changed my mind, 125 00:06:37,150 --> 00:06:38,742 I will have you for the evening. 126 00:06:38,819 --> 00:06:41,150 Oh! Boy. 127 00:06:41,220 --> 00:06:42,847 She'll get back to you on that. 128 00:06:43,122 --> 00:06:46,091 Politically, no, I don't support Chavez. 129 00:06:46,158 --> 00:06:48,922 I despise him and everything that he does. 130 00:06:50,830 --> 00:06:54,424 On the other hand, this is a pretty sweet-ass gun. 131 00:06:56,868 --> 00:06:57,926 The banana you wanted, senor. 132 00:06:58,003 --> 00:06:59,937 Ah! Finally. You peel. 133 00:07:00,739 --> 00:07:02,171 What? 134 00:07:02,239 --> 00:07:05,037 With your hands, you peel the banana. 135 00:07:06,744 --> 00:07:09,440 Okay! Let's get started, shall we? 136 00:07:09,513 --> 00:07:11,571 I have a full day of activities planned. 137 00:07:11,648 --> 00:07:13,980 I would like to see where the children are fed the sweeteners. 138 00:07:14,584 --> 00:07:15,642 A restaurant? 139 00:07:15,718 --> 00:07:17,743 American children are fattened more efficiently 140 00:07:17,820 --> 00:07:19,151 than any other children in the world. 141 00:07:19,222 --> 00:07:21,849 I mean, they're like little basketballs. 142 00:07:21,923 --> 00:07:24,016 I mean, they're huge, little porkers. 143 00:07:24,092 --> 00:07:25,252 Okay. 144 00:07:25,327 --> 00:07:27,591 This is our thermometer! 145 00:07:27,829 --> 00:07:31,025 I'm trying to turn a giant dirt pit into a community park. 146 00:07:31,232 --> 00:07:35,692 But I need $35,000, and the city doesn't have enough money in its budget. 147 00:07:36,304 --> 00:07:37,794 I do not understand. 148 00:07:37,872 --> 00:07:39,305 You've never had a budget shortage? 149 00:07:44,911 --> 00:07:46,276 No. 150 00:07:46,346 --> 00:07:48,712 Venezuela is blessed with massive oil reserves. 151 00:07:48,782 --> 00:07:50,874 Massive, I mean, tremendous, like, you would not believe. 152 00:07:50,949 --> 00:07:51,973 Hmm. 153 00:07:52,051 --> 00:07:55,987 The state sells the oil, and keeps all the money, 154 00:07:56,055 --> 00:07:57,454 and we build whatever we want. 155 00:07:58,123 --> 00:08:02,252 Wow, well. Now, I do not understand. 156 00:08:06,297 --> 00:08:09,357 I feel my English was very clear. Shall I repeat? 157 00:08:09,801 --> 00:08:12,701 Venezuela, Venezuela, my country, 158 00:08:12,836 --> 00:08:15,737 has a lot of oil. Oil is food for cars. 159 00:08:16,106 --> 00:08:19,041 The Venezuelans are a very confident people. 160 00:08:20,309 --> 00:08:23,107 Okay, look, I know these guys didn't turn out to be exactly 161 00:08:23,179 --> 00:08:24,237 how we thought they would be. 162 00:08:24,313 --> 00:08:26,281 You said they might not know what toilet paper is. 163 00:08:26,749 --> 00:08:29,911 I'm calling an audible. We can't be humble anymore. 164 00:08:29,984 --> 00:08:32,646 What we're gonna do is, we're gonna take them to our best park 165 00:08:32,721 --> 00:08:34,052 and we're gonna blow their socks off. 166 00:08:34,122 --> 00:08:36,590 Yeah, I don't think that's gonna blow their socks off. 167 00:08:36,758 --> 00:08:38,521 Fine, we'll go further. We'll take them to Chicago 168 00:08:38,593 --> 00:08:41,618 and pretend it's part of Pawnee. Or New York. Or London! 169 00:08:41,695 --> 00:08:42,992 No, wait, the money's different there. 170 00:08:43,063 --> 00:08:45,588 They'll figure it out. Okay, never mind. We'll go to the park. 171 00:08:46,266 --> 00:08:48,928 Everybody doing okay back there? Comfortable? 172 00:08:51,471 --> 00:08:54,668 Well, the motel we're putting you up in is really nice. 173 00:08:54,741 --> 00:08:58,370 You can watch TBS. Do you have TBS in Venezuela? 174 00:08:59,212 --> 00:09:01,475 I have everything in Venezuela. 175 00:09:01,546 --> 00:09:03,741 I have four satellite dishes on my estate. 176 00:09:04,216 --> 00:09:09,017 We get 14,000 channels. Fourteen thousand. 177 00:09:09,987 --> 00:09:12,251 I already know who wins Project Runway. 178 00:09:12,323 --> 00:09:14,848 Wow. I'm coming over to your house then. 179 00:09:14,925 --> 00:09:16,290 I see what you're getting at, but no, thank you. 180 00:09:16,360 --> 00:09:19,522 I am still primarily interested in the large black woman. 181 00:09:24,601 --> 00:09:26,865 Here we are! Take it in, boys. 182 00:09:26,936 --> 00:09:29,631 - This is an embarrassment to America. - I'm sorry? 183 00:09:29,686 --> 00:09:31,169 You are right to want to correct this. 184 00:09:31,204 --> 00:09:32,336 Correct what? 185 00:09:32,367 --> 00:09:35,768 This is the giant pit of dirt you were telling us about, is it not? 186 00:09:35,944 --> 00:09:38,003 The one you want to turn into a park? 187 00:09:38,042 --> 00:09:41,129 No, no. This is already a park. 188 00:09:41,182 --> 00:09:42,979 And it's one of our best-loved parks. 189 00:09:43,050 --> 00:09:44,725 Why are the trees so small? 190 00:09:45,520 --> 00:09:47,283 They're not that small. 191 00:09:47,388 --> 00:09:49,480 Besides, size doesn't matter. 192 00:09:49,556 --> 00:09:52,047 Yes, it does. Our trees are huge. 193 00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:54,420 We build tunnels through them. 194 00:10:09,507 --> 00:10:12,670 The parks in Boraqua are far superior. 195 00:10:12,744 --> 00:10:14,575 The park in my hometown, El parque del Este, 196 00:10:14,646 --> 00:10:17,979 we have a monorail, and we have an aquarium, 197 00:10:18,049 --> 00:10:21,040 and we have the Jaripa Amphitheater. It's huge. 198 00:10:21,118 --> 00:10:22,813 Lady Gaga played there last week. 199 00:10:22,886 --> 00:10:24,717 Great. Well, we don't have Lady Gaga. 200 00:10:25,355 --> 00:10:27,255 And I don't think she's going to come here 201 00:10:27,324 --> 00:10:29,484 unless her career takes a very bad turn. 202 00:10:29,859 --> 00:10:33,659 But we have something more beautiful than Lady Gaga. Democracy. 203 00:10:34,297 --> 00:10:35,389 I'm gonna show you an example of that. 204 00:10:35,465 --> 00:10:36,989 Let's go to a town hall meeting. 205 00:10:38,333 --> 00:10:43,771 Elvis, Oh Henry! Raul, Butterfinger. 206 00:10:44,105 --> 00:10:47,734 Antonio, Nestle Crunch with the crispy rice removed. 207 00:10:47,809 --> 00:10:51,209 Weird choice, but for you, I got it done. 208 00:10:56,617 --> 00:10:59,244 I find it incredibly demeaning. But guess what? 209 00:10:59,319 --> 00:11:02,914 Cash money. I'm gonna make it rain 210 00:11:04,557 --> 00:11:06,548 I'm just gonna pick that up real quick. 211 00:11:06,793 --> 00:11:09,226 So, are you guys ready? We're about to start. 212 00:11:09,394 --> 00:11:11,521 This is where you have your meetings? 213 00:11:11,597 --> 00:11:13,353 Well, the location rotates. 214 00:11:13,378 --> 00:11:16,129 Sometimes we have them on the volleyball courts. 215 00:11:18,236 --> 00:11:19,404 Where do you hold your meetings? 216 00:11:19,437 --> 00:11:20,734 Well, now that you ask, 217 00:11:20,805 --> 00:11:23,330 we usually rotate as well between different fortresses 218 00:11:23,407 --> 00:11:25,272 and citadels, and palaces. 219 00:11:25,743 --> 00:11:28,040 Hmm. We don't need palaces. 220 00:11:29,045 --> 00:11:31,707 The ideas are what shine in our meetings. 221 00:11:31,882 --> 00:11:33,975 What are you? Some kind of moron? 222 00:11:34,050 --> 00:11:37,213 Why don't you have hand dryers in the park bathrooms? 223 00:11:37,287 --> 00:11:39,811 They're so much more sanitary than paper towels! 224 00:11:39,889 --> 00:11:41,015 Anyone knows that! 225 00:11:41,090 --> 00:11:44,890 My dog went to one of your parks and ate another dog's feces. 226 00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:46,894 And I'm going to sue you for that. 227 00:11:47,429 --> 00:11:49,396 - How do you like it? - No! 228 00:11:49,464 --> 00:11:51,455 How do you like that? 229 00:11:51,533 --> 00:11:53,296 Now imagine you're holding coffee. 230 00:11:53,801 --> 00:11:55,268 This is outrageous. 231 00:11:55,336 --> 00:11:57,769 Where are the armed men who come in to take the protesters away? 232 00:11:57,838 --> 00:11:58,862 Where are they? 233 00:11:58,939 --> 00:12:02,238 This kind of behavior is never tolerated in Boraqua. 234 00:12:02,309 --> 00:12:04,641 You shout like that, they put you in jail. 235 00:12:04,711 --> 00:12:07,645 Right away. No trial, no nothing. 236 00:12:07,713 --> 00:12:10,614 Journalists? We have a special jail for journalists. 237 00:12:10,683 --> 00:12:12,583 You're stealing? Right to jail. 238 00:12:12,652 --> 00:12:15,052 You're playing music too loud? Right to jail. Right away. 239 00:12:15,121 --> 00:12:17,782 You're driving too fast? Jail. Slow? Jail. 240 00:12:17,856 --> 00:12:20,848 You're charging too high prices for sweaters, 241 00:12:20,926 --> 00:12:23,053 glasses, you right to jail. 242 00:12:23,128 --> 00:12:25,528 You undercook fish, believe it or not, jail. 243 00:12:25,597 --> 00:12:28,360 You overcook chicken, also jail. 244 00:12:28,432 --> 00:12:29,660 Undercook, overcook. 245 00:12:29,733 --> 00:12:31,792 You make an appointment with the dentist and you don't show up? 246 00:12:31,869 --> 00:12:33,530 Believe it or not, jail, right away. 247 00:12:33,604 --> 00:12:37,095 We have the best patients in the world, because of jail. 248 00:12:38,541 --> 00:12:40,805 Well, it was tough going, but it was lively. 249 00:12:40,877 --> 00:12:43,368 What did you think of the open forum? 250 00:12:43,613 --> 00:12:46,775 This meeting of ugly people yelling? It is like torture. 251 00:12:47,082 --> 00:12:48,413 That's one perspective. 252 00:12:48,483 --> 00:12:51,975 In Boraqua, the government moves like a hot knife through butter. 253 00:12:52,054 --> 00:12:54,181 Not as this here, listening to people yelling, 254 00:12:54,256 --> 00:12:56,349 these fat faces turning all red? 255 00:12:56,425 --> 00:12:58,119 Are you kidding me? We're like kings! 256 00:12:58,192 --> 00:13:01,184 We walk down the street and they treat us like rock stars. 257 00:13:02,229 --> 00:13:03,423 We answer to nobody. 258 00:13:03,497 --> 00:13:07,227 In a true Democracy, we believe that the input of our citizens 259 00:13:07,300 --> 00:13:08,892 is extremely valuable. 260 00:13:08,969 --> 00:13:12,063 Hey! These pretzels suck! 261 00:13:13,139 --> 00:13:14,936 Thank you. See? 262 00:13:16,009 --> 00:13:17,839 No wonder nothing ever gets done in this country. 263 00:13:17,910 --> 00:13:19,309 Really? Nothing gets done? 264 00:13:19,378 --> 00:13:20,970 Tell that to the Golden Gate Bridge. 265 00:13:21,046 --> 00:13:23,071 Or American Idol. Or the moon! 266 00:13:23,148 --> 00:13:25,878 Oh, wait, you can't, 'cause you've never been there. 267 00:13:25,951 --> 00:13:28,316 Look, this is not personal. 268 00:13:28,386 --> 00:13:31,947 We just think that you are weak and your city is disgusting. 269 00:13:32,023 --> 00:13:35,186 I think you're rude. And I think you've been rude since you came here. 270 00:13:35,259 --> 00:13:40,491 And I think that your medals are stupid and your uniform is lame, 271 00:13:40,964 --> 00:13:42,989 and you guys want to marry Hugo Chavez! 272 00:13:43,066 --> 00:13:46,796 Hey! Do not disrespect Chavez. 273 00:13:46,912 --> 00:13:48,594 Stupid Chavez. 274 00:13:49,438 --> 00:13:51,531 - I just told you not to disrespect him. - Good, I just did. 275 00:13:51,607 --> 00:13:53,165 - That's twice. - I don't like Chavez. 276 00:13:53,242 --> 00:13:54,834 Yes, you do. And do not disrespect him. 277 00:13:54,910 --> 00:13:56,274 - No, I don't! - Yes, you do! 278 00:13:56,344 --> 00:14:01,577 No, I don't, Raul. Look, if you don't like it here, then go, okay, Raul? 279 00:14:01,850 --> 00:14:03,715 - Great. - Good. Shut up. 280 00:14:03,785 --> 00:14:06,446 We're shutting up, yeah. And we'll go. 281 00:14:08,389 --> 00:14:09,720 - Those are our pens. - Right. 282 00:14:09,790 --> 00:14:12,384 We don't even need them. Great, then don't take them. 283 00:14:12,459 --> 00:14:13,824 We didn't. 284 00:14:17,563 --> 00:14:19,190 They started it. 285 00:14:20,752 --> 00:14:25,313 Look, those guys were rude, arrogant, narrow-minded, class-A jerks. 286 00:14:25,389 --> 00:14:28,051 Now, I may have lost my cool, but they deserved it. 287 00:14:28,125 --> 00:14:30,685 Okay. I'll call the mayor and cancel the photo-op. 288 00:14:30,761 --> 00:14:32,592 - No! Don't do that! - Okay. 289 00:14:32,663 --> 00:14:34,721 Then call the Venezuelans and apologize. 290 00:14:34,797 --> 00:14:38,198 No, they were rude, arrogant, narrow-minded, class-A jerks! 291 00:14:38,701 --> 00:14:41,295 Okay. Then I'll call the mayor and cancel the photo-op. 292 00:14:41,370 --> 00:14:42,462 No! 293 00:14:43,606 --> 00:14:44,902 Do you see the problem here? 294 00:14:44,973 --> 00:14:46,634 Yes! But I don't want to! 295 00:14:47,442 --> 00:14:49,273 Yesterday I was tough and direct 296 00:14:49,344 --> 00:14:51,244 and today I have to be charming. 297 00:14:51,446 --> 00:14:52,606 Basically... Thank you! 298 00:14:52,681 --> 00:14:54,910 Yesterday I was Hillary Clinton, and today I'm Bill. 299 00:14:56,083 --> 00:14:58,677 Can I get anyone anything to drink before we start? 300 00:14:58,752 --> 00:14:59,776 Coffee? Brandy? 301 00:14:59,853 --> 00:15:00,842 I'd love some coffee. 302 00:15:00,921 --> 00:15:02,445 - Anything, guys? - No. 303 00:15:02,523 --> 00:15:04,114 - Some nuts? - I'll have some nuts. 304 00:15:04,190 --> 00:15:05,521 - Gummi Bears? - Sure. 305 00:15:05,591 --> 00:15:06,956 - Apple crisps? - Yeah. 306 00:15:07,026 --> 00:15:08,618 - Granola bars? - I'll take those. 307 00:15:08,695 --> 00:15:10,867 Nothing? Sure? 308 00:15:11,064 --> 00:15:13,726 Okay. I'll be right out there if you need me. 309 00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:16,666 Well, Raul, gentlemen, thank you for coming. 310 00:15:16,735 --> 00:15:18,669 Well, I would just like to first say, 311 00:15:18,737 --> 00:15:20,602 I am so sorry for blowing up yesterday. 312 00:15:20,672 --> 00:15:22,936 It was completely uncalled for. 313 00:15:23,675 --> 00:15:27,633 Well, we are sorry as well. We were very tired from our long journey. 314 00:15:27,712 --> 00:15:29,373 Also, we were a bit jealous. 315 00:15:29,447 --> 00:15:32,883 Our colleagues from Caracas are visiting their sister city of Miami. 316 00:15:32,950 --> 00:15:35,975 Yeah. They've been partying with Dwyane Wade. 317 00:15:36,052 --> 00:15:38,714 They sent us all these photos and QuickTime files. 318 00:15:38,788 --> 00:15:41,586 I mean, you have to see this place Miami. Just gorgeous, everything. 319 00:15:41,658 --> 00:15:44,091 There's so much soul and life everywhere! 320 00:15:44,159 --> 00:15:47,026 Every little tiny street, so much culture, and history! 321 00:15:47,096 --> 00:15:49,291 And the cars! People really take care of their cars there. 322 00:15:49,364 --> 00:15:51,639 - You notice that and they're a little older. - Clean and shiny... 323 00:15:51,670 --> 00:15:53,308 but still just beautiful. - Yeah. 324 00:15:53,385 --> 00:15:54,379 Really, really nice. 325 00:15:54,406 --> 00:15:58,570 And the food, so spicy and wonderful. We could not even believe it. 326 00:15:59,674 --> 00:16:02,507 But Pawnee is really good as well. 327 00:16:02,577 --> 00:16:05,875 Yes. In any case, I made a few phone calls, 328 00:16:05,946 --> 00:16:09,973 and the government of Venezuela has authorized 329 00:16:11,218 --> 00:16:14,118 a special gift for you. 330 00:16:20,192 --> 00:16:21,420 $35,000? 331 00:16:21,494 --> 00:16:25,267 Yes, it is to fill your pit to start to build a park. 332 00:16:26,498 --> 00:16:28,227 No, no, we can't take this. 333 00:16:28,299 --> 00:16:32,736 Yes, yes, yes. Please. We will see you later today at the photo-opportunity. 334 00:16:32,804 --> 00:16:35,426 And I think we're good here. No? 335 00:16:36,940 --> 00:16:41,172 Okay. Okay, gracias. 336 00:16:41,445 --> 00:16:42,911 Good meeting. 337 00:16:44,680 --> 00:16:47,114 I don't know. Maybe I should return the money. 338 00:16:47,183 --> 00:16:48,582 It's from a foreign government, 339 00:16:48,651 --> 00:16:50,016 I don't really trust these guys. 340 00:16:50,086 --> 00:16:52,077 - I'm gonna return the money. - Are you crazy? 341 00:16:52,155 --> 00:16:53,849 You could buy a low-end Lexus with that money. 342 00:16:53,922 --> 00:16:55,787 Or, you could build a park with that money. 343 00:16:55,857 --> 00:16:57,256 Let's look at the pros and cons. 344 00:16:57,325 --> 00:16:59,418 Pro, we could fill in the pit and build a park. 345 00:16:59,494 --> 00:17:01,655 Con, we might be filling it in with dirty money. 346 00:17:01,730 --> 00:17:03,959 Pro, $35,000 worth of dirty money. 347 00:17:04,031 --> 00:17:05,623 Con, not quite sure why that's a pro. 348 00:17:05,699 --> 00:17:07,257 Pro, we can fill in the pit. 349 00:17:07,334 --> 00:17:11,293 Con, Ann already said that. Pro and con never works! 350 00:17:11,372 --> 00:17:13,066 Pro, yes it does. 351 00:17:19,245 --> 00:17:21,076 Fine. Fine. We'll keep the money. Okay? 352 00:17:21,147 --> 00:17:22,579 Everybody happy? Jerry, are you happy? 353 00:17:22,648 --> 00:17:24,843 What did I do? Meeting adjourned, Jerry! 354 00:17:59,238 --> 00:18:02,352 Can I just say, I still feel kind of weird about this money. 355 00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:04,610 Okay. Look, I know they've given you a hard time. 356 00:18:04,684 --> 00:18:06,549 When the mayor gets here, we'll do the photo-op, 357 00:18:06,620 --> 00:18:08,087 they'll be out of our hair, 358 00:18:08,154 --> 00:18:09,644 you'll get to build your park. 359 00:18:11,323 --> 00:18:12,790 Ah! Leslie! Hello. 360 00:18:12,858 --> 00:18:16,089 Raul. The mayor will be with us in just a few minutes. 361 00:18:16,161 --> 00:18:17,423 If you don't mind, we would like to take 362 00:18:17,496 --> 00:18:19,396 a video of you to show our superiors. 363 00:18:19,465 --> 00:18:20,489 Okay, sure. 364 00:18:20,566 --> 00:18:22,032 Do you have the check that we gave to you? 365 00:18:22,100 --> 00:18:23,465 Ah, yes, I do. 366 00:18:24,502 --> 00:18:26,800 Okay, you're gonna show it to the camera 367 00:18:26,871 --> 00:18:29,339 and say how much it is and what it is for. 368 00:18:30,807 --> 00:18:35,767 Okay, this is a check for $35,000 and it is to build a park. 369 00:18:36,179 --> 00:18:37,339 How generous! 370 00:18:37,414 --> 00:18:38,938 Yes, it's really generous. 371 00:18:39,549 --> 00:18:41,607 Now say "Viva Venezuela!" 372 00:18:42,051 --> 00:18:43,245 Viva Venezuela! 373 00:18:43,319 --> 00:18:44,752 Viva Chavez! 374 00:18:46,389 --> 00:18:47,913 Thank you, Venezuela! 375 00:18:47,990 --> 00:18:49,150 "Viva Chavez!" Say it! 376 00:18:49,225 --> 00:18:50,317 Aw, come on. 377 00:18:51,793 --> 00:18:54,887 I don't want to "viva" that guy. 378 00:18:54,963 --> 00:18:58,296 We just gave you $35,000. That's worth one "viva." 379 00:19:05,139 --> 00:19:06,731 Viva Chavez. 380 00:19:06,807 --> 00:19:08,468 Yes! Viva Chavez! 381 00:19:10,209 --> 00:19:11,301 Yeah. 382 00:19:15,248 --> 00:19:16,943 What is he saying? 383 00:19:19,585 --> 00:19:24,954 They are very happy. They say Hugo Chavez will love this video 384 00:19:25,023 --> 00:19:28,481 because it is another success for their committee. 385 00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:29,788 Committee? 386 00:19:29,861 --> 00:19:31,122 Yeah. 387 00:19:31,195 --> 00:19:34,494 They're a Committee to Humiliate and Shame America. 388 00:19:35,866 --> 00:19:37,697 It will be a good video. 389 00:19:37,768 --> 00:19:41,100 The Committee to Humiliate and Shame America? 390 00:19:41,171 --> 00:19:46,074 Yes. It is Hugo Chavez's passion project. And we just had an idea. 391 00:19:46,142 --> 00:19:48,110 Why don't you call the park after Chavez? 392 00:19:48,178 --> 00:19:50,077 You know, you call it Hugo Chavez Park. 393 00:19:50,145 --> 00:19:53,410 And you can have a nice, big fountain of his head, 394 00:19:53,482 --> 00:19:55,074 so that when the water is coming out 395 00:19:55,150 --> 00:19:57,050 he is spitting at you all the time. 396 00:19:58,554 --> 00:20:00,214 You should write this down. 397 00:20:03,658 --> 00:20:09,062 Viva America! Viva Pawnee! Viva Mayor Walter Gunderson! 398 00:20:09,730 --> 00:20:11,095 You have offended us. 399 00:20:11,164 --> 00:20:14,031 You have offended the government of Boraqua. 400 00:20:14,101 --> 00:20:16,331 You are no longer our sister. 401 00:20:19,306 --> 00:20:21,865 No, America is not perfect. 402 00:20:23,275 --> 00:20:27,211 But diplomacy isn't just sucking up and being a pushover. 403 00:20:27,279 --> 00:20:29,405 Sometimes you got to get tough. 404 00:20:29,948 --> 00:20:34,442 I am gonna build that park myself, and it is gonna be awesome. 405 00:20:35,286 --> 00:20:36,719 And it's not gonna have a fountain 406 00:20:36,788 --> 00:20:38,756 shaped like Hugo Chavez's head 407 00:20:38,823 --> 00:20:40,756 spitting water all over everyone. 408 00:20:41,392 --> 00:20:46,728 Unless that's what the people want. And that, sir, is democracy. 409 00:20:49,641 --> 00:20:54,271 Leslie, come see this! Check out this video April sent me. 410 00:20:54,946 --> 00:20:58,313 Hey, guys. I'm at Johnny's place in Venezuela. 411 00:20:58,382 --> 00:20:59,644 It's okay, I guess. 412 00:20:59,717 --> 00:21:01,810 He has like five million rooms. 413 00:21:01,886 --> 00:21:03,183 And this is only his guesthouse. 414 00:21:03,254 --> 00:21:04,448 Holy cow! 415 00:21:04,522 --> 00:21:06,922 There's a lot of guys with guns here. 416 00:21:06,991 --> 00:21:09,356 It's better than my mom's house, I guess. 417 00:21:09,726 --> 00:21:12,923 So, tell Leslie I don't know when I'm gonna be back. 418 00:21:12,996 --> 00:21:14,472 Oh, and Donna's here. 419 00:21:17,133 --> 00:21:19,566 Hey, guys! Ola!