1
00:00:02,709 --> 00:00:04,509
Potential problem.

2
00:00:04,878 --> 00:00:07,904
The previous owner of Lot
48, Norquist Properties,

3
00:00:07,949 --> 00:00:09,746
is claiming the
government screwed them

4
00:00:09,794 --> 00:00:11,852
by illegally seizing the land.

5
00:00:12,823 --> 00:00:15,451
I know about this issue.
I called the city attorney, like, 50 times.

6
00:00:15,500 --> 00:00:16,599
He didn't call me back.

7
00:00:16,640 --> 00:00:17,678
Oh, do you need a lawyer?

8
00:00:17,720 --> 00:00:19,839
Because my friend Justin's a lawyer.
I'm sure he could help.

9
00:00:19,869 --> 00:00:20,945
Oh, that'd be terrific.

10
00:00:20,971 --> 00:00:21,995
Yeah. I'll call him.

11
00:00:22,072 --> 00:00:23,865
Justin's the greatest guy ever.

12
00:00:24,815 --> 00:00:26,444
"The greatest guy ever"?

13
00:00:26,543 --> 00:00:28,858
But does he dress this well?

14
00:00:29,511 --> 00:00:32,241
Brooks Brothers.
Bought it right off the mannequin.

15
00:00:34,583 --> 00:00:36,175
Ron Swanson?

16
00:00:37,543 --> 00:00:38,382
That's me.

17
00:00:38,418 --> 00:00:39,794
My name is George MacFayden.

18
00:00:39,822 --> 00:00:43,656
I wanted to talk to you about the
amount of snow in the parks.

19
00:00:44,325 --> 00:00:46,548
I've been getting
a lot of visitors recently,

20
00:00:46,961 --> 00:00:51,125
thanks to a stupid
and worthless new push

21
00:00:51,199 --> 00:00:54,896
to make government officials
more accessible to the public.

22
00:00:55,436 --> 00:00:57,461
There is a disturbing
lack of benches

23
00:00:57,538 --> 00:00:59,699
in Ramsett Park!
I want to sit more!

24
00:01:00,407 --> 00:01:06,573
And another thing I like is the
layout of the hiking trails.

25
00:01:07,314 --> 00:01:10,943
I made this in one of your pottery classes.
It's terrible.

26
00:01:12,185 --> 00:01:13,777
This is my hell.

27
00:01:44,524 --> 00:01:46,524
- Hey!
- Hey!

28
00:01:46,574 --> 00:01:49,937
Alright. So Tom, here's your
Chicken Caesar salad.

29
00:01:49,976 --> 00:01:53,023
No dressing, no cheese,
no croutons, no taste.

30
00:01:53,079 --> 00:01:54,682
And no carbs.

31
00:01:55,481 --> 00:01:59,435
- And for you, madam, the Leslie Knope.
- Thank you.

32
00:01:59,466 --> 00:02:01,628
I can't believe the cafeteria
named a sandwich after you.

33
00:02:01,654 --> 00:02:02,996
- They're so cool.
- Mm-hmm.

34
00:02:03,034 --> 00:02:07,521
Salami on pumpernickel with olive
juice and extra iceberg.

35
00:02:07,597 --> 00:02:09,947
It was the only sandwich on
the board that wasn't named.

36
00:02:10,109 --> 00:02:12,109
I just wish I'd liked it.

37
00:02:12,215 --> 00:02:14,604
So how are you feeling about
the whole Dave situation?

38
00:02:14,642 --> 00:02:16,161
Aw, I realy miss him.

39
00:02:16,229 --> 00:02:18,160
Yeah, I'm just trying to
enjoy the memories.

40
00:02:18,197 --> 00:02:20,849
- Aw, that's a sweet picture.
- Oh, isn't it.

41
00:02:20,954 --> 00:02:23,558
I asked the polive department
if I could have it and they said no,

42
00:02:23,601 --> 00:02:24,670
so I stole it.

43
00:02:24,707 --> 00:02:27,307
I have an idea. Why don't you
let me set you up?

44
00:02:27,357 --> 00:02:29,357
Oh, I don't know.
It feel a little too soon.

45
00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:31,906
I'm telling you, this is the best
way to get over someone.

46
00:02:31,931 --> 00:02:33,931
Just... get back on that horse.

47
00:02:34,231 --> 00:02:36,231
Yeah. Maybe.

48
00:02:36,362 --> 00:02:38,362
I feel sorry for Leslie.

49
00:02:38,418 --> 00:02:41,155
It's really hard to end a relationship
because of distance.

50
00:02:41,310 --> 00:02:44,019
Although that's pretty much
why I broke up with Andy.

51
00:02:44,387 --> 00:02:46,387
He lived way too close to me.

52
00:02:47,286 --> 00:02:49,699
Wow, 12:15!
You're early today.

53
00:02:49,847 --> 00:02:51,909
April, there's no paper
in the printer.

54
00:02:51,978 --> 00:02:53,427
So?

55
00:02:53,658 --> 00:02:55,903
So that's the one thing you do.

56
00:02:56,815 --> 00:02:58,129
Ugh.

57
00:03:04,777 --> 00:03:07,840
Attention.
April stop doing that.

58
00:03:07,909 --> 00:03:10,340
Jerry told me to,
so it's super crucial.

59
00:03:10,470 --> 00:03:13,559
More important than that and
more important than anything

60
00:03:13,896 --> 00:03:16,814
in this godforsaken world
is finding me an assistant.

61
00:03:16,858 --> 00:03:18,389
You get an assistant now?

62
00:03:18,439 --> 00:03:20,752
Yeah, I've always been able to
have one, but I've turned it down

63
00:03:20,777 --> 00:03:23,565
'cause it's a waste of money.
In the eight years I've been at the job,

64
00:03:23,602 --> 00:03:27,304
I've saved the taxpayers of
this city more than 150 grand.

65
00:03:27,512 --> 00:03:30,181
But now,
I need the taxpayers' money

66
00:03:30,524 --> 00:03:32,524
to save me from the taxpayers.

67
00:03:33,455 --> 00:03:35,455
Post this at your college.

68
00:03:37,452 --> 00:03:39,452
This looks like
an ad for nothing.

69
00:03:39,739 --> 00:03:42,265
Please be careful with it,
it's my only copy.

70
00:03:44,625 --> 00:03:47,150
Leslie?
Ann's friend, Justin.

71
00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:48,956
Oh, hey, yeah, of course! Hi!

72
00:03:49,005 --> 00:03:50,265
Thank you.
Thank you for coming in.

73
00:03:50,297 --> 00:03:51,597
It's my pleasure.
Not a problem.

74
00:03:51,625 --> 00:03:52,560
Have a seat.

75
00:03:52,599 --> 00:03:55,274
I should warn you, land seizure
isn't really my specialty,

76
00:03:55,298 --> 00:03:56,964
but I'm happy to take a look.
Any friend of Ann's...

77
00:03:56,988 --> 00:03:58,101
Is a friend of mine!

78
00:03:58,284 --> 00:04:01,762
That's my motto, too.
So, what is your specialty?

79
00:04:01,875 --> 00:04:04,925
Is it locking up the bad guys
or keeping them on the streets?

80
00:04:05,043 --> 00:04:07,950
Uhm, neither.
Civil litigation, mostly.

81
00:04:07,984 --> 00:04:08,756
That's interesting.

82
00:04:08,791 --> 00:04:10,632
It can be.
I've got this crazy case...

83
00:04:10,666 --> 00:04:13,464
Have you ever heard of this
product Fire in a Can?

84
00:04:13,529 --> 00:04:15,190
Ah, I love those commercials!

85
00:04:15,225 --> 00:04:18,119
If you wanna start a fire
but you have to do it fast, then—

86
00:04:18,164 --> 00:04:21,370
Yeah, well, you shouldn't buy it.
It will literally burn your hand clean off.

87
00:04:21,527 --> 00:04:22,824
- Oh, wow.
- Mmm-hmm.

88
00:04:22,894 --> 00:04:26,587
It is an aerosol can with
an igniter and a trigger.

89
00:04:26,965 --> 00:04:30,492
It's essentially a blowtorch,
and if you can believe it,

90
00:04:31,203 --> 00:04:33,796
it was invented to
warm up baby bottles.

91
00:04:33,871 --> 00:04:35,600
This is my colleague,
Tom Haverford.

92
00:04:36,040 --> 00:04:37,098
Tom. Justin.

93
00:04:37,175 --> 00:04:40,372
How are you? You are wearing the
hell out of that suit, sir.

94
00:04:40,407 --> 00:04:41,499
Banana, two-button.

95
00:04:41,530 --> 00:04:42,792
Okay. Let's go into
the conference room.

96
00:04:42,822 --> 00:04:45,034
- I've got everything laid out. Tom stop.
- We should talk later.

97
00:04:45,085 --> 00:04:47,143
You are very organized, Leslie.

98
00:04:47,219 --> 00:04:49,781
Yeah, I am. Thank you.

99
00:04:49,922 --> 00:04:51,651
I love what you do.
You have the coolest job.

100
00:04:51,724 --> 00:04:53,611
Let me guess.
This is our park.

101
00:04:53,659 --> 00:04:55,286
I want to know
everything about this.

102
00:04:55,361 --> 00:04:58,435
Oh. Okay. Well, these green
things represent trees.

103
00:04:58,964 --> 00:05:00,589
I come in, like, two hours late

104
00:05:00,633 --> 00:05:04,728
because I had to finish watching
Swimfan because it was on,

105
00:05:04,801 --> 00:05:06,701
and everyone, like,
jumped down my throat.

106
00:05:06,782 --> 00:05:08,045
Oh, man.

107
00:05:08,237 --> 00:05:09,747
I can't wait
till my internship is over

108
00:05:09,778 --> 00:05:11,370
so I can get
the hell out of here.

109
00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:13,342
Well, you're all set.

110
00:05:14,336 --> 00:05:16,361
Free of charge, of course.

111
00:05:16,538 --> 00:05:19,166
Hey, why don't you
sell your band's CDs here?

112
00:05:19,241 --> 00:05:23,176
That is a brilliant idea.
I cannot believe I didn't think of that.

113
00:05:23,244 --> 00:05:27,010
I have been writing a lot of songs
about shining shoes lately.

114
00:05:27,081 --> 00:05:29,675
I tend to write
about what I'm doing.

115
00:05:30,117 --> 00:05:34,667
Talking about
writing about what I'm doing

116
00:05:35,656 --> 00:05:41,491
Now I'm singing about talking about
writing about what I'm doing

117
00:05:42,298 --> 00:05:44,442
Of course I'm gonna have to take
a closer look at these things but

118
00:05:44,467 --> 00:05:46,723
my gut's telling me that this is
not gonna be a big deal.

119
00:05:46,887 --> 00:05:48,718
Companies make bogus claims
like this all the time.

120
00:05:48,789 --> 00:05:50,188
I think you're
gonna be just fine.

121
00:05:50,257 --> 00:05:52,282
Thank you so much.
I know you're really busy.

122
00:05:52,315 --> 00:05:53,449
Please, my pleasure.

123
00:05:53,486 --> 00:05:55,799
At least this stuff is
interesting, you know?

124
00:05:56,130 --> 00:05:58,723
You know, it actually
reminds me, two years ago,

125
00:05:58,798 --> 00:06:00,698
I was in Borneo
officiating a wedding,

126
00:06:00,767 --> 00:06:03,099
and this enormous
medicine man showed up

127
00:06:03,169 --> 00:06:05,782
and he was there to basically tell...
- Justin!

128
00:06:06,283 --> 00:06:08,080
- Hey, kiddo! How you doing?
- Hey!

129
00:06:08,207 --> 00:06:09,544
I'm good. I haven't
seen you in forever!

130
00:06:09,575 --> 00:06:10,882
I know!
It's so good to see you.

131
00:06:10,910 --> 00:06:12,707
You, too. Do you want
to grab some dinner?

132
00:06:12,779 --> 00:06:15,508
Uh, I would love to.
I cannot. I am swamped.

133
00:06:15,580 --> 00:06:16,604
You're always so busy.

134
00:06:16,682 --> 00:06:17,706
Yeah.

135
00:06:17,770 --> 00:06:19,245
- Next week, I promise.
- Okay.

136
00:06:19,321 --> 00:06:20,246
Hey, I'm Mark.

137
00:06:20,295 --> 00:06:21,728
- Oh, sorry!
- Hey, Mark.

138
00:06:21,763 --> 00:06:23,763
Justin, this is Mark.
This is the city planner.

139
00:06:23,803 --> 00:06:26,397
Oh, my God! It's such
a pleasure to meet you.

140
00:06:26,459 --> 00:06:28,222
- Pleasure.
- Pleasure.

141
00:06:29,703 --> 00:06:33,046
Anyway, Leslie, I have to go.
It has been a super pleasure meeting you.

142
00:06:33,097 --> 00:06:34,603
I am gonna get into
this over the weekend,

143
00:06:34,632 --> 00:06:36,623
and I will get back to you
on Monday about it.

144
00:06:36,701 --> 00:06:37,725
- Okay. Great.
- All right.

145
00:06:37,758 --> 00:06:39,858
- See you, Justin!
- Okay, Tom. Good seeing you.

146
00:06:39,963 --> 00:06:43,490
I've been thinking.
It has been a while since Dave left,

147
00:06:43,744 --> 00:06:46,044
and I think I might be ready
to start dating again.

148
00:06:46,295 --> 00:06:47,465
That's great!

149
00:06:47,533 --> 00:06:49,433
You know, I was only
with Mark for one night,

150
00:06:49,501 --> 00:06:51,799
and then I was hung up
on him for six years.

151
00:06:52,973 --> 00:06:57,392
I dated Dave for three months,
so if I continue that pattern,

152
00:06:57,416 --> 00:06:59,865
I won't be over him for...

153
00:07:01,211 --> 00:07:02,940
Five hundred years.

154
00:07:03,312 --> 00:07:04,574
What is your ideal man?

155
00:07:04,647 --> 00:07:08,664
He has the brains of George
Clooney in the body of Joe Biden.

156
00:07:09,618 --> 00:07:12,987
Interesting. That's uh, ### weird ###.

157
00:07:13,025 --> 00:07:14,687
Okay. Just off the bat,

158
00:07:14,725 --> 00:07:17,100
there's a couple of doctors
I think you would love.

159
00:07:17,124 --> 00:07:18,892
Actually I was thinking...

160
00:07:18,986 --> 00:07:20,742
What about Justin?

161
00:07:21,044 --> 00:07:23,192
I mean, I feel like we kind
of hit it off in there.

162
00:07:23,257 --> 00:07:24,688
N-no, I don't...

163
00:07:25,148 --> 00:07:27,666
I just don't know if that
would be the right...

164
00:07:27,753 --> 00:07:29,122
- Fit. No.
- No?

165
00:07:29,152 --> 00:07:30,394
There's something
wrong with him?

166
00:07:30,424 --> 00:07:32,948
No, no, he's great. He's really,
really, really great,

167
00:07:32,973 --> 00:07:34,646
and you're so great, obviously.

168
00:07:34,676 --> 00:07:36,762
I just... I don't...
I don't know.

169
00:07:36,805 --> 00:07:39,498
- It's hard. I can't-I can't put.
- What is it though?

170
00:07:39,516 --> 00:07:42,410
- I don't know. It's just. I don't think
it would be. - I think it would.

171
00:07:42,572 --> 00:07:44,234
- No?
- I really don't.

172
00:07:44,265 --> 00:07:46,567
- I'm sorry. I don't—
- Don't be sorry. I mean if you think

173
00:07:46,592 --> 00:07:47,848
it wasn't gonna work or...

174
00:07:47,888 --> 00:07:50,448
But I will find you someone, I
promise, and he'll be awesome.

175
00:07:50,488 --> 00:07:52,706
- I'm gonna go do it right now actually.
- Great, good, great, yes!

176
00:07:52,735 --> 00:07:54,895
Go, Ann, go!
Oh, just one rule.

177
00:07:54,948 --> 00:07:58,748
I don't want to date a twin,
'cause I've been tricked before.

178
00:07:58,818 --> 00:07:59,842
Okay.

179
00:08:01,087 --> 00:08:03,487
Yes. I understand
your complaint.

180
00:08:03,790 --> 00:08:07,277
I have to go now.
Please. Thank you.

181
00:08:07,560 --> 00:08:08,566
Ron Solo!

182
00:08:08,772 --> 00:08:09,872
Hello, Tom.

183
00:08:17,286 --> 00:08:18,644
Okay.

184
00:08:18,725 --> 00:08:20,555
I want to help you
with your assistant search.

185
00:08:20,626 --> 00:08:21,650
Why?

186
00:08:21,689 --> 00:08:23,099
Just want to do
my boy Ron a solid.

187
00:08:23,133 --> 00:08:24,432
I know exactly what
you're looking for,

188
00:08:24,466 --> 00:08:26,198
and I will find you
a reliable person.

189
00:08:26,361 --> 00:08:28,361
Okay. Sound good.

190
00:08:41,151 --> 00:08:43,597
How do you know that was a member
of the public and not just a friend?

191
00:08:43,634 --> 00:08:47,027
Yeah, my friends know that I
have a strict no call policy.

192
00:08:47,968 --> 00:08:50,162
Now get out there and
find me an assistant.

193
00:08:50,636 --> 00:08:51,574
Okay.

194
00:08:51,604 --> 00:08:53,157
I left you three messages.
Did you get them?

195
00:08:53,195 --> 00:08:55,163
No, I've been running around all day.
What's up?

196
00:08:55,230 --> 00:08:57,790
I found the perfect guy to set you
up with, but he's going out of town,

197
00:08:57,866 --> 00:09:01,495
so he can only do tonight, so I
came over here right after work.

198
00:09:01,570 --> 00:09:03,231
- Is that his blood?
- What?

199
00:09:03,372 --> 00:09:05,033
Oh, damn,
now I have to go back.

200
00:09:05,107 --> 00:09:06,903
- Who is he?
- His name is Chris

201
00:09:06,974 --> 00:09:07,963
and he's an MRI technician,

202
00:09:08,042 --> 00:09:10,306
and he's really cute, and he's
very passionate about his job,

203
00:09:10,378 --> 00:09:12,812
and I told him all about you,
and he's really interested.

204
00:09:12,880 --> 00:09:15,610
So, dinner tonight,
and here's the info.

205
00:09:15,883 --> 00:09:19,046
Thanks! Wait!
How's he gonna know it's me?

206
00:09:19,854 --> 00:09:21,219
I'll wear a red
rose in my hair.

207
00:09:21,355 --> 00:09:22,719
No, I'll wear a giant red hat.

208
00:09:22,789 --> 00:09:24,313
No, I don't have one of those.
What should I wear?

209
00:09:24,391 --> 00:09:25,415
It's gotta be red.

210
00:09:25,492 --> 00:09:28,154
- I will just tell him what you look like.
- Good call.

211
00:09:29,563 --> 00:09:31,861
Hi. I'm Leslie.
Are you Chris?

212
00:09:31,932 --> 00:09:32,990
- Yeah.
- Sorry I'm late.

213
00:09:33,066 --> 00:09:36,116
Oh, don't worry about it.
You look beautiful.

214
00:09:36,236 --> 00:09:37,225
Thank you.

215
00:09:37,247 --> 00:09:38,567
Oh, here,
let me take your coat.

216
00:09:38,810 --> 00:09:40,072
- Thanks.
- Sure.

217
00:09:40,673 --> 00:09:42,197
Well done, Ann.

218
00:09:42,975 --> 00:09:44,840
- I actually heard that.
- What?

219
00:09:47,091 --> 00:09:50,549
Well, I went to Wisconsin for
both undergrad and grad school.

220
00:09:50,665 --> 00:09:51,654
Go Badgers!

221
00:09:51,677 --> 00:09:53,302
Boo! Indiana Hoosiers!

222
00:09:53,338 --> 00:09:54,737
No. Badgers.

223
00:09:55,574 --> 00:09:56,562
Oh.

224
00:09:57,190 --> 00:09:58,657
It's not important.
I'm just

225
00:09:59,192 --> 00:10:01,129
glad that we could
make this happen.

226
00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:03,191
Ann kept going on
about how wonderful you are,

227
00:10:03,262 --> 00:10:05,287
and I just had
to see for myself.

228
00:10:05,364 --> 00:10:06,922
Well, she's my
number-one best friend.

229
00:10:06,999 --> 00:10:10,264
I wish she'd told me that you
went to Indiana, but whatever.

230
00:10:10,336 --> 00:10:12,361
So, you're in charge of
amusement parks, right?

231
00:10:12,438 --> 00:10:13,426
God, that's exciting!

232
00:10:13,505 --> 00:10:14,995
Actually, it's regular parks.

233
00:10:15,807 --> 00:10:17,274
Like swings and
slides and stuff.

234
00:10:17,843 --> 00:10:19,105
Strike two.

235
00:10:21,213 --> 00:10:25,445
You know, isn't it funny how these
setups are always just so awkward?

236
00:10:25,470 --> 00:10:27,096
Why would you say that?

237
00:10:28,675 --> 00:10:30,675
I don't-I don't know.

238
00:10:31,262 --> 00:10:33,299
They're not. Forget it.

239
00:10:33,874 --> 00:10:35,874
Way to go, Chris.

240
00:10:36,255 --> 00:10:40,794
- Did I just make it awkward?
- No. No. You didn't.

241
00:10:42,006 --> 00:10:44,172
Well, yeah, you kind of did.

242
00:10:46,366 --> 00:10:48,366
Let's just start from the
beginning, I guess.

243
00:10:48,434 --> 00:10:50,026
Hey, watch this.

244
00:10:50,227 --> 00:10:53,525
I will now extinguish this
candle with my bare hand.

245
00:10:54,305 --> 00:10:55,397
Okay.

246
00:11:00,025 --> 00:11:01,525
- That really hurt!
- Are you okay?

247
00:11:01,580 --> 00:11:04,174
Oh, God! It looked so much
easier on the Internet.

248
00:11:04,207 --> 00:11:06,801
God, I gotta
borrow some of your ice!

249
00:11:12,827 --> 00:11:15,310
Oh no thanks.
I'm not thirsty.

250
00:11:16,172 --> 00:11:17,279
What?

251
00:11:17,299 --> 00:11:20,455
German? Oh, my God.

252
00:11:20,969 --> 00:11:22,675
All right, later.

253
00:11:23,942 --> 00:11:26,708
- Was that, uh, Justin?
- Yeah. We're having lunch tomorrow.

254
00:11:28,078 --> 00:11:31,122
- How long have you known him?
- Ugh. Forever.

255
00:11:31,210 --> 00:11:34,877
He practically saved my life. He was, like,
the only cool dude at my high school.

256
00:11:35,083 --> 00:11:36,527
Awesome.

257
00:11:36,855 --> 00:11:38,005
Did you guys ever date?

258
00:11:38,056 --> 00:11:39,386
No. We never did.

259
00:11:39,723 --> 00:11:42,791
He's just, like,
a really amazing person.

260
00:11:44,730 --> 00:11:45,609
Let's do this!

261
00:11:45,657 --> 00:11:47,024
- Yes.
- Marley and Me!

262
00:11:47,051 --> 00:11:48,532
- Let's do it.
- Puppies, puppies, puppies!

263
00:11:48,553 --> 00:11:52,903
I know.
Let's watch Marley and Me.

264
00:11:55,393 --> 00:11:56,552
Brian.

265
00:11:59,383 --> 00:12:00,876
Technically,
you'd be assisting Ron,

266
00:12:00,908 --> 00:12:03,564
but Ron really doesn't do
much government work,

267
00:12:03,752 --> 00:12:05,549
so you'd really
be working for me.

268
00:12:05,586 --> 00:12:07,130
I see your resume here.

269
00:12:07,204 --> 00:12:09,922
Excellent.
Awesome professional experience.

270
00:12:09,965 --> 00:12:11,798
But I don't care.

271
00:12:13,628 --> 00:12:15,687
I'm interested in
real world expertise.

272
00:12:17,076 --> 00:12:21,238
I got a nightclub opening to go to.
Which tie do I wear?

273
00:12:21,630 --> 00:12:23,688
I like the one on the left.

274
00:12:23,764 --> 00:12:26,639
That was a trick question.
The answer's this one.

275
00:12:26,833 --> 00:12:28,833
I didn't even know
that one existed.

276
00:12:29,102 --> 00:12:31,349
I had high hopes when I saw
your plumbed V-Neck.

277
00:12:31,617 --> 00:12:34,332
But those hopes have been dashed.
You can leave.

278
00:12:34,607 --> 00:12:36,830
Did you ever see that
movie The Matrix?

279
00:12:37,411 --> 00:12:39,798
- Yeah.
- 99% real.

280
00:12:40,465 --> 00:12:43,559
So, do you enjoy it,
being an MRI technician?

281
00:12:43,737 --> 00:12:46,638
Great question.
Someone steps into the room.

282
00:12:46,941 --> 00:12:49,933
Imagine a mother of three,
maybe she's a teacher.

283
00:12:50,010 --> 00:12:51,203
She knows something's wrong,

284
00:12:51,277 --> 00:12:52,801
but she doesn't know
what it is.

285
00:12:52,942 --> 00:12:54,409
She's scared.

286
00:12:54,747 --> 00:12:57,215
In less than an hour,
I know what it is.

287
00:12:57,283 --> 00:12:58,443
What's wrong with her?

288
00:12:58,518 --> 00:12:59,574
I don't know.

289
00:12:59,603 --> 00:13:02,601
But the best part about
being an MRI technician is,

290
00:13:02,940 --> 00:13:05,067
I can see inside everything.

291
00:13:05,409 --> 00:13:09,752
See that guy over there?
Imagine being able to look inside his head.

292
00:13:10,113 --> 00:13:11,580
- Wow.
- I know.

293
00:13:11,915 --> 00:13:16,501
I mean, you could look inside this steak
or you could look inside this butter

294
00:13:16,526 --> 00:13:21,195
or the potatoes or this candle
or this beer or this flower or this bread.

295
00:13:21,254 --> 00:13:23,491
You can look inside anything.

296
00:13:23,604 --> 00:13:25,177
Well, if you look
inside this bread,

297
00:13:25,208 --> 00:13:26,622
all you're gonna find
is more bread.

298
00:13:26,660 --> 00:13:28,804
I don't know.
I'd have to do an MRI.

299
00:13:28,934 --> 00:13:30,307
Look.

300
00:13:32,657 --> 00:13:35,396
- Just bread in there.
- Yeah but what's inside that bread?

301
00:13:35,458 --> 00:13:36,991
Could be cheese.

302
00:13:37,472 --> 00:13:39,702
Anyway, it's good that
you found your calling.

303
00:13:39,774 --> 00:13:42,607
I mean, I've never
even had an MRI before.

304
00:13:43,211 --> 00:13:44,303
What?

305
00:13:46,281 --> 00:13:48,249
I don't know about this.

306
00:13:48,683 --> 00:13:50,651
Well, I'm offering you
a free scan.

307
00:13:50,785 --> 00:13:52,753
It usually costs up to $2,000.

308
00:13:53,354 --> 00:13:55,583
I'm kind of spoiling you here.

309
00:13:55,889 --> 00:13:58,187
Well, I am a little curious.

310
00:13:58,576 --> 00:13:59,383
Good.

311
00:13:59,426 --> 00:14:01,101
Frankly, I don't want
to invest in someone

312
00:14:01,138 --> 00:14:02,582
who only has
three months to live.

313
00:14:05,564 --> 00:14:06,588
Oh.

314
00:14:06,609 --> 00:14:09,227
I'm treating this as an adventure.
Who knows, maybe some day

315
00:14:09,270 --> 00:14:12,351
we'll tell our grandkids about how
weird our first date was.

316
00:14:12,382 --> 00:14:16,109
And how creepy their
grandfather was.

317
00:14:17,140 --> 00:14:20,421
Try not to smile too much.
It'll effect the diagnosis.

318
00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:23,294
Well hopefully there will be
nothing to diagnose.

319
00:14:23,706 --> 00:14:26,370
Sometimes smiling is read as AIDS:

320
00:14:26,693 --> 00:14:29,274
Oh, you're not
on your period, are you?

321
00:14:29,587 --> 00:14:31,187
No. Does that matter?

322
00:14:31,307 --> 00:14:32,672
Well, not for this.

323
00:14:33,958 --> 00:14:36,153
Okay. It's gonna be
a little crammed in there.

324
00:14:36,227 --> 00:14:38,855
Don't worry, I'll be right on
the other side of that glass.

325
00:14:41,808 --> 00:14:44,533
I meet a girl at a bar.

326
00:14:44,587 --> 00:14:46,406
She seems kind of into me,
could go either way.

327
00:14:46,444 --> 00:14:48,925
I get her number, it's two days
later, what do I text her?

328
00:14:49,187 --> 00:14:50,312
"It was nice meeting you."

329
00:14:50,380 --> 00:14:53,420
No, Zack! I don't text her,
"It was nice meeting you."

330
00:14:53,526 --> 00:14:56,844
I wait eight weeks and I
text her, "What's cracking?"

331
00:14:56,919 --> 00:14:58,919
Your resume is very impressive.

332
00:14:58,962 --> 00:15:01,506
Tell me about you.
Tell me about your friends.

333
00:15:01,725 --> 00:15:04,005
Be as superficial as possible.

334
00:15:04,445 --> 00:15:05,912
Just your basic
assistant stuff.

335
00:15:05,980 --> 00:15:07,845
Taking messages,
wake-up calls,

336
00:15:07,915 --> 00:15:10,908
Bottle service at The Snakehole Lounge,
condom runs,

337
00:15:10,957 --> 00:15:13,391
Covering for me at any legally
dicey situations.

338
00:15:13,425 --> 00:15:15,081
I'm sorry.
What do I get out of this?

339
00:15:15,148 --> 00:15:17,298
Connections.
Plus 19 grand a year,

340
00:15:17,350 --> 00:15:19,716
minus my 10% headhunters' fee.

341
00:15:20,176 --> 00:15:22,032
I have to pay you
two grand if I get hired?

342
00:15:22,211 --> 00:15:23,542
I have a job to offer.

343
00:15:23,612 --> 00:15:26,103
In the immortal words
of Rod Blagojevich,

344
00:15:26,182 --> 00:15:29,208
"It's a valuable thing.
You just don't give it away for nothing."

345
00:15:29,858 --> 00:15:31,971
Alright Leslie, you're gonna start
hearing some loud noises

346
00:15:31,996 --> 00:15:33,996
and see some flashin lights.

347
00:15:34,533 --> 00:15:35,765
Okay.

348
00:15:35,999 --> 00:15:37,795
So you never told me
where you're from.

349
00:15:37,867 --> 00:15:40,121
- I'm from Pawnee.
- Keep still, please.

350
00:15:40,551 --> 00:15:42,958
And you said that your mom works
in Government too. Is that right?

351
00:15:42,983 --> 00:15:45,723
- Yes she does. - You got to keep still.
No talking, Leslie.

352
00:15:47,208 --> 00:15:48,670
What kind of music do you like?

353
00:15:50,003 --> 00:15:51,223
Can I answer that?

354
00:15:51,265 --> 00:15:52,459
Sure. Keep still.

355
00:15:53,159 --> 00:15:54,353
All kinds.

356
00:15:54,630 --> 00:15:57,463
Very important that you keep
still at this moment, Leslie.

357
00:15:57,533 --> 00:15:59,296
I've told you that
a thousand times.

358
00:16:02,270 --> 00:16:03,783
Did you ever break your arm?

359
00:16:03,857 --> 00:16:05,777
You can answer that.
Here, I'll turn it off.

360
00:16:05,870 --> 00:16:08,338
One time I was on my bike and
some boys were making fun of me,

361
00:16:08,406 --> 00:16:10,897
so I chased them
and I lost control.

362
00:16:10,975 --> 00:16:12,602
I'm surprised you can see that.

363
00:16:12,677 --> 00:16:14,542
It was, like, three years ago.

364
00:16:15,213 --> 00:16:18,182
I can't believe I turned
the machine off for that.

365
00:16:18,249 --> 00:16:20,278
You never had any kids,
right, Leslie?

366
00:16:20,642 --> 00:16:22,041
No.

367
00:16:22,286 --> 00:16:23,412
You've got a great oven.

368
00:16:23,456 --> 00:16:25,129
Okay, time to go.

369
00:16:25,188 --> 00:16:26,951
You got ample room in there.

370
00:16:27,024 --> 00:16:29,049
Honestly, if you wanted to,

371
00:16:29,126 --> 00:16:31,787
you could go triplets
right off the bat, Leslie.

372
00:16:31,995 --> 00:16:35,114
You got a big,
industrial-sized oven.

373
00:16:35,299 --> 00:16:36,463
So we're done, right?

374
00:16:37,322 --> 00:16:39,499
Sorry. I gotta get that.

375
00:16:40,803 --> 00:16:42,202
Hey! How's the date going?

376
00:16:42,271 --> 00:16:44,420
Good!
We just finished the MRI.

377
00:16:44,445 --> 00:16:45,251
What?

378
00:16:45,300 --> 00:16:47,134
Look, I know I said that I
wanted to get back out there,

379
00:16:47,172 --> 00:16:48,434
but this guy is nuts.

380
00:16:48,528 --> 00:16:51,085
I don't mean to offend you,
you know, I know he's your friend.

381
00:16:51,135 --> 00:16:54,470
No, I'm not offended at all.
I don't know him that well.

382
00:16:54,526 --> 00:16:56,526
Why would you think, he would be
perfect for me then?

383
00:16:56,563 --> 00:16:58,107
Well he seemed great.

384
00:16:58,129 --> 00:17:01,291
I'm sorry, Les.
I'll find you somebody else, okay?

385
00:17:01,506 --> 00:17:03,418
Just don't let this
sour you on dating.

386
00:17:03,568 --> 00:17:05,769
I think what you're doing,
is very healthy.

387
00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:07,199
So keep the faith. Okay?

388
00:17:07,225 --> 00:17:08,852
Yeah, okay.

389
00:17:09,292 --> 00:17:10,953
Hey! No cell phones!

390
00:17:14,938 --> 00:17:16,570
- Don't touch that!
- Sorry.

391
00:17:16,613 --> 00:17:18,283
Just take your hands of it.

392
00:17:18,663 --> 00:17:20,187
What was that about?

393
00:17:20,465 --> 00:17:21,928
I set Leslie up on a date.

394
00:17:21,970 --> 00:17:23,437
I don't think
it's going that well.

395
00:17:23,480 --> 00:17:26,068
Oh, no. With Justin?

396
00:17:26,170 --> 00:17:28,638
Oh, no. This guy I know
from the hospital.

397
00:17:28,693 --> 00:17:30,481
Why wouldn't you set
her up with Justin?

398
00:17:30,525 --> 00:17:32,254
I don't really
see them together.

399
00:17:32,326 --> 00:17:35,082
You know? Plus, Leslie just
got out of a relationship,

400
00:17:35,115 --> 00:17:36,412
so I didn't want
Justin to be, like,

401
00:17:36,464 --> 00:17:38,659
her rebound guy
or anything, you know?

402
00:17:39,667 --> 00:17:40,793
Yeah, that makes sense.

403
00:17:40,868 --> 00:17:43,840
Leslie is a notoriously cruel
and thoughtless person.

404
00:17:43,911 --> 00:17:45,308
Why are we talking about this?

405
00:17:45,386 --> 00:17:46,750
We're not.

406
00:17:48,031 --> 00:17:50,824
- What do you see?
- Well actually it looks pretty good.

407
00:17:51,082 --> 00:17:53,050
You've got a large brain.

408
00:17:53,222 --> 00:17:54,138
Thank you.

409
00:17:54,182 --> 00:17:55,814
Yeah. Well,
it looks pretty...

410
00:17:56,521 --> 00:17:57,749
Hang on.

411
00:17:58,957 --> 00:18:00,254
That's weird.

412
00:18:00,306 --> 00:18:01,398
What? What's weird?

413
00:18:01,449 --> 00:18:02,541
Your brain.

414
00:18:03,027 --> 00:18:04,187
See that shadow right there?

415
00:18:04,237 --> 00:18:05,387
- Oh, my God!
- What? Is that bad?

416
00:18:05,430 --> 00:18:07,363
I don't know. I'd have a doctor
look at that immediately

417
00:18:07,431 --> 00:18:09,296
if I were you.

418
00:18:09,347 --> 00:18:10,814
Are you serious?

419
00:18:10,907 --> 00:18:12,016
Oh, wait.

420
00:18:14,404 --> 00:18:15,393
Oh.

421
00:18:15,939 --> 00:18:18,373
It's, like, a smudge
or something.

422
00:18:18,779 --> 00:18:21,350
We almost wheeled you out
of here in a chair.

423
00:18:22,112 --> 00:18:25,040
- Should we go?
- Yeah. We should go.

424
00:18:26,019 --> 00:18:28,431
Imagine if you had spent
rest of your life

425
00:18:28,499 --> 00:18:30,715
sipping a steak through a straw.

426
00:18:31,833 --> 00:18:35,087
That almost happened to you.
You were a smudge away.

427
00:18:37,368 --> 00:18:39,495
Thank God I was here.

428
00:18:40,096 --> 00:18:42,278
Looks like we make a
pretty good team.

429
00:18:43,133 --> 00:18:44,714
I'm sorry, but there's
just something weird

430
00:18:44,768 --> 00:18:46,065
about the way
you talk about him.

431
00:18:46,136 --> 00:18:49,435
I don't know. There was
definitely times when we thought

432
00:18:49,506 --> 00:18:51,062
maybe we would go out someday.

433
00:18:51,108 --> 00:18:53,599
That's why you didn't set Leslie up.
Because you're saving him.

434
00:18:53,677 --> 00:18:54,889
No, I'm not.

435
00:18:54,945 --> 00:18:56,302
Oh, yeah, you are.

436
00:18:56,480 --> 00:18:59,812
Okay, fine. You don't have someone
in your life that you think,

437
00:18:59,882 --> 00:19:03,070
"I don't know, maybe if things were
different, maybe, some day..."

438
00:19:03,107 --> 00:19:05,951
If I'm late for dinner one night
you're gonna dump me for Dustin?

439
00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:07,843
- No, no Justin.
- Justin?

440
00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:11,285
Absolutely not. But if
we break up or...

441
00:19:11,372 --> 00:19:15,522
you... die tragically in a
city planning accident

442
00:19:15,572 --> 00:19:18,585
and I'll wait respectful amount of time.
I don't know, maybe?

443
00:19:18,617 --> 00:19:19,606
You know what?

444
00:19:19,666 --> 00:19:21,210
You can't save somebody
for the future

445
00:19:21,247 --> 00:19:22,646
while you're in a relationship.

446
00:19:22,688 --> 00:19:23,884
Even I know that.

447
00:19:24,019 --> 00:19:25,501
So, did you want to
go back to your place?

448
00:19:25,539 --> 00:19:26,870
Yeah, actually, Chris,

449
00:19:26,940 --> 00:19:30,413
it was nice to meet you, but I think
this is gonna be our last date.

450
00:19:30,911 --> 00:19:34,173
I get it. Get your MRI
and get out, huh?

451
00:19:34,314 --> 00:19:35,406
This was your idea.

452
00:19:35,482 --> 00:19:36,540
Clever lady.

453
00:19:36,616 --> 00:19:39,244
I guess I'm not as good a
tech as I thought I was.

454
00:19:39,319 --> 00:19:41,616
I should have noticed
that you're missing a heart.

455
00:19:42,313 --> 00:19:44,194
- Ew.
- Goodbye, Leslie.

456
00:19:48,927 --> 00:19:52,610
Right.
I drove us here. Goodie.

457
00:19:52,631 --> 00:19:54,770
Hey, do you mind if we
pick up my son Nate

458
00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:56,893
at his basketball game
on the way back?

459
00:20:02,883 --> 00:20:05,068
So how was the big date?

460
00:20:05,137 --> 00:20:07,010
Well the good news is,
I don't have cancer.

461
00:20:07,041 --> 00:20:10,600
The bad news is, I got
an MRI bill for $2000.

462
00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:12,403
Oh. That sounds hot.

463
00:20:12,433 --> 00:20:14,378
I just don't understand
why the hell Ann thought

464
00:20:14,403 --> 00:20:15,614
we will be a good fit.

465
00:20:15,663 --> 00:20:19,609
- Ooh you slept together?
- What? Not sexually.

466
00:20:19,680 --> 00:20:21,750
God what's wrong with you, Tom?

467
00:20:21,863 --> 00:20:23,107
Is it bad time?

468
00:20:23,360 --> 00:20:24,944
No. Come on in.

469
00:20:24,975 --> 00:20:26,975
- Justin.
- What's up brother.

470
00:20:27,110 --> 00:20:29,551
- Should we?
- Yeah. Let's do it.

471
00:20:29,844 --> 00:20:31,450
- See you, dude!
- See you later, brother.

472
00:20:34,670 --> 00:20:37,582
I have the same one.
In a extra small.

473
00:20:41,823 --> 00:20:44,291
Andy. Can I talk to you
for a second?

474
00:20:44,354 --> 00:20:47,775
Well, well, well. Look who's
bothering who now.

475
00:20:48,649 --> 00:20:50,757
Seems like the shoe
is in the other foot.

476
00:20:51,036 --> 00:20:54,411
And the guy who polishes
shoes is now me.

477
00:20:58,410 --> 00:21:00,351
Whaddup? What can I do for you?

478
00:21:00,372 --> 00:21:03,364
When you were dating Ann,
did you know this guy Justin?

479
00:21:03,442 --> 00:21:05,535
Oh, Justin?
I hate Justin.

480
00:21:05,911 --> 00:21:08,135
Ann was so obviously into him.
It was so annoying.

481
00:21:08,239 --> 00:21:08,914
Right.

482
00:21:08,947 --> 00:21:11,211
I would say, in terms of guys
that she's in love with,

483
00:21:11,282 --> 00:21:15,334
Justin's up here, I'm up here,
and then you're down here.

484
00:21:15,420 --> 00:21:18,548
Well, I just wanted to make
sure that I wasn't crazy,

485
00:21:18,623 --> 00:21:22,280
so, naturally, I came
to you for reassurance.

486
00:21:22,727 --> 00:21:26,162
Do me a favor. Don't tell Ann
that we talked about this.

487
00:21:26,230 --> 00:21:27,219
Will do.

488
00:21:27,297 --> 00:21:30,580
Ann Perkins!
You should be ashamed of yourself.

489
00:21:30,834 --> 00:21:32,597
What you're doing
to Mark is not cool.

490
00:21:32,669 --> 00:21:35,914
Why are you guys talking to each other?
You know what? Forget it.

491
00:21:36,014 --> 00:21:38,107
- I'm not getting into this with you.
- You did something wrong?

492
00:21:38,141 --> 00:21:40,684
- No! I didn't do anything wrong.
- Yeah.

493
00:21:41,177 --> 00:21:43,427
Come here. This is
none of your business.

494
00:21:43,479 --> 00:21:44,802
You don't know what
you're talking about.

495
00:21:44,847 --> 00:21:47,420
Actually, I do know
what I'm talking about.

496
00:21:47,516 --> 00:21:48,861
Every time I used to sit around

497
00:21:48,886 --> 00:21:50,211
all afternoon
playing video games

498
00:21:50,253 --> 00:21:52,090
wearing only my slippers,
all of a sudden,

499
00:21:52,121 --> 00:21:54,351
I would start to feel bad
about myself,

500
00:21:54,924 --> 00:21:56,224
and do you know why?

501
00:21:56,292 --> 00:21:57,553
Didn't you just explain why?

502
00:21:57,626 --> 00:21:59,685
I would feel bad
about myself because

503
00:21:59,761 --> 00:22:02,161
I would start to think
about this perfect guy.

504
00:22:02,230 --> 00:22:03,891
Anytime you would
talk about Justin,

505
00:22:03,965 --> 00:22:05,470
I didn't feel very important.

506
00:22:06,835 --> 00:22:08,274
That was rough.

507
00:22:08,637 --> 00:22:09,797
Well, I didn't know that.

508
00:22:10,038 --> 00:22:11,699
Maybe if you had,
I wouldn't have left.

509
00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:15,272
But you do know now,
so you have to choose.

510
00:22:15,543 --> 00:22:16,669
It's either me or Justin.

511
00:22:16,744 --> 00:22:18,211
I'm not gonna choose.

512
00:22:18,646 --> 00:22:20,327
- Wait. I'm dating Mark!
- Are you, though?

513
00:22:20,364 --> 00:22:22,335
- Yes!
- Ah! That close.

514
00:22:22,679 --> 00:22:25,467
Wow! This is really good.
"Cease and desist."

515
00:22:25,579 --> 00:22:27,034
"Burden of proof."

516
00:22:27,090 --> 00:22:29,545
Very forceful language.
I'm a little scared.

517
00:22:29,602 --> 00:22:32,324
Check out paragraph two.
I drop the F-bomb.

518
00:22:32,622 --> 00:22:34,270
"Frivolous."

519
00:22:34,532 --> 00:22:36,089
Excellent.

520
00:22:36,507 --> 00:22:38,306
Definitely have the city
attorney look at that,

521
00:22:38,343 --> 00:22:40,745
but that should be
enough to do the trick.

522
00:22:40,801 --> 00:22:43,420
Well, Justin, I just...
I can't thank you enough.

523
00:22:43,457 --> 00:22:46,243
It's my pleasure.
Maybe I'll see you around sometime.

524
00:22:46,679 --> 00:22:49,765
Yeah! I would love...
Mmm-hmm.

525
00:22:50,014 --> 00:22:51,140
- I'll see you.
- Okay.

526
00:22:51,165 --> 00:22:52,748
- Bye.
- Bye.

527
00:22:56,490 --> 00:22:59,341
Damn! He is all right.

528
00:22:59,827 --> 00:23:01,827
Why don't you hit that?

529
00:23:02,020 --> 00:23:05,227
Well, frankly,
I would like to hit that,

530
00:23:05,820 --> 00:23:08,089
but Ann's being
a little weird about it.

531
00:23:08,451 --> 00:23:10,451
Maybe she's got him on hold.

532
00:23:11,344 --> 00:23:12,864
What do you mean?

533
00:23:13,563 --> 00:23:17,465
Ronald, I've done it.
I've found your assistant, and he's dope.

534
00:23:17,867 --> 00:23:19,858
His name is Jean-Ralphio.

535
00:23:20,135 --> 00:23:21,363
Jean-Ralphio!

536
00:23:21,417 --> 00:23:22,406
Big T.

537
00:23:22,571 --> 00:23:24,436
- What up?
- Mr. Swanson, two things.

538
00:23:24,506 --> 00:23:27,782
One, it is an absolute
honor to meet you.

539
00:23:27,806 --> 00:23:30,274
Two, who is that
hot intern chick out there?

540
00:23:30,301 --> 00:23:33,699
Because honestly, damn!

541
00:23:34,511 --> 00:23:36,578
- Take a seat.
- Right. Here we go.

542
00:23:37,284 --> 00:23:39,013
So, Jean-Ralphio...

543
00:23:39,220 --> 00:23:41,552
You got him right here.
Leave a message after the beep.

544
00:23:41,622 --> 00:23:44,056
Why do I want you
as my assistant?

545
00:23:44,392 --> 00:23:46,826
For starters,
access to the illest clubs.

546
00:23:46,894 --> 00:23:49,055
And that's just for starters.
I will work for you.

547
00:23:49,104 --> 00:23:51,368
I'll be on you 24/7.
I'll be like your family.

548
00:23:51,465 --> 00:23:52,733
I'm here when you
get here in the morning.

549
00:23:52,767 --> 00:23:54,658
Sure enough, I'll be there
tucking you into bed at night.

550
00:23:54,701 --> 00:23:56,694
Don't worry, it's not gay.
Do we have questions?

551
00:23:58,462 --> 00:24:00,568
I think our only question is,
when can you start?

552
00:24:00,607 --> 00:24:02,199
Right now, let's do it!

553
00:24:02,275 --> 00:24:05,382
Thank you for coming in.
We will talk.

554
00:24:05,712 --> 00:24:07,612
Cool. I feel good
about this.

555
00:24:07,681 --> 00:24:09,331
And, you know, you can hit
me up on Facebook anytime,

556
00:24:09,382 --> 00:24:10,637
day or night.
You know that, right?

557
00:24:10,757 --> 00:24:12,384
- Take care, buddy.
- Boom.

558
00:24:12,951 --> 00:24:15,181
So what do you think
of your new assistant?

559
00:24:15,621 --> 00:24:17,953
I want to punch you in the
face so bad right now.

560
00:24:18,023 --> 00:24:20,414
What? Okay.

561
00:24:21,727 --> 00:24:23,289
Message received.
I'll keep looking.

562
00:24:23,328 --> 00:24:25,833
Thank you. Bring me
the opposite of him.

563
00:24:27,556 --> 00:24:30,201
Tell me what Ann did wrong, please?
I need to know.

564
00:24:30,244 --> 00:24:32,697
Nothing. It's none of my business.

565
00:24:32,974 --> 00:24:34,168
What kind of music is this?

566
00:24:34,242 --> 00:24:36,185
It's rock and roll, my friend.

567
00:24:36,228 --> 00:24:38,665
The kind that sticks in to
your brain. Loud,

568
00:24:38,741 --> 00:24:41,705
fast, smooth, handsome rock.

569
00:24:41,818 --> 00:24:43,718
That band is really
blowing up right now.

570
00:24:43,787 --> 00:24:45,379
They're number one on iTunes.

571
00:24:45,455 --> 00:24:47,542
Okay. I'll take one.

572
00:24:53,182 --> 00:24:57,244
You are amazing!
I like when you hang out here.

573
00:25:00,207 --> 00:25:01,697
I want to be your assistant.

574
00:25:01,743 --> 00:25:03,987
Really? You hate it here.

575
00:25:04,260 --> 00:25:08,161
So do you. I'll make sure you
don't have to go to any meetings.

576
00:25:08,298 --> 00:25:11,233
If anyone comes to see you,
I'll scare them away.

577
00:25:11,333 --> 00:25:15,213
Wait, April, if you had to
choose between these two ties...

578
00:25:16,310 --> 00:25:17,777
You're hired.

579
00:25:18,037 --> 00:25:21,704
I just figured I might as
well get paid for being here.

580
00:25:24,035 --> 00:25:26,438
- Hi.
- Hey! I was just calling you.

581
00:25:26,909 --> 00:25:28,001
Here.

582
00:25:29,981 --> 00:25:31,778
This is a prescription
for Denise Dogan.

583
00:25:31,850 --> 00:25:35,567
Oh, my God, I'm sorry.
I'm so out of sorts.

584
00:25:36,421 --> 00:25:37,513
Here.

585
00:25:37,932 --> 00:25:39,488
Porter's Grill
at 7:00.

586
00:25:39,524 --> 00:25:41,357
Justin's gonna meet you there.

587
00:25:41,554 --> 00:25:43,295
I'm sorry Chris was
such a jerk.

588
00:25:43,360 --> 00:25:44,952
You deserve
way better than that.

589
00:25:45,029 --> 00:25:46,997
If this situation is weird
or if you feel weird...

590
00:25:47,039 --> 00:25:48,336
It's not weird.

591
00:25:48,432 --> 00:25:49,713
You guys will really
like each other.

592
00:25:49,756 --> 00:25:50,572
Thanks.

593
00:25:50,602 --> 00:25:52,143
I gotta run.
I have another stop

594
00:25:52,168 --> 00:25:55,224
on the pride-swallowing tour of City Hall.
- Go get him.

595
00:25:55,253 --> 00:25:56,990
That's where
I never find things.

596
00:25:57,040 --> 00:25:58,064
Hey.

597
00:25:58,141 --> 00:25:59,165
Hi, Ann.

598
00:25:59,242 --> 00:26:01,835
So, I just set up
Justin and Leslie.

599
00:26:03,546 --> 00:26:05,036
And I'm sorry.

600
00:26:05,104 --> 00:26:07,646
I rented District 9,

601
00:26:08,073 --> 00:26:11,397
if you maybe wanted to
spoil that for me tonight.

602
00:26:15,368 --> 00:26:16,716
Oh, my God!

603
00:26:16,776 --> 00:26:17,997
Dark ending, right?

604
00:26:21,052 --> 00:26:24,681
I'm back on the horse,
and this horse is a lawyer,

605
00:26:24,725 --> 00:26:29,128
so I'm looking forward
to riding him.

606
00:26:29,326 --> 00:26:30,388
No, wait.

607
00:26:32,725 --> 00:26:33,817
Ten months ago,

608
00:26:33,892 --> 00:26:37,658
she was an intern who could give a
C-R-A-P about local government.

609
00:26:37,730 --> 00:26:41,063
Now, she's our
newest employee. To April!

610
00:26:41,400 --> 00:26:42,458
- Cheers!
- Cheers!

611
00:26:42,534 --> 00:26:43,558
Yay!

612
00:26:43,636 --> 00:26:44,898
Jerry, come and celebrate!

613
00:26:45,704 --> 00:26:46,693
No, thanks.

614
00:26:46,772 --> 00:26:48,898
Well, everybody,
let's get back to work.

615
00:26:53,044 --> 00:26:54,170
Where are you going?

616
00:26:54,245 --> 00:26:56,907
I want to talk to Ron
about the size of my desk.

617
00:26:56,956 --> 00:27:00,369
Jerry, you have to
schedule an appointment.

618
00:27:00,985 --> 00:27:02,043
Okay. How about now?

619
00:27:02,120 --> 00:27:03,109
Ron's not here.

620
00:27:03,149 --> 00:27:05,241
He's right there.
I can see him.

621
00:27:05,922 --> 00:27:07,549
I'll let you know
when he's available.

622
00:27:12,202 --> 00:27:13,623
Attagirl.