1
00:00:02,214 --> 00:00:04,150
Good morning, Ron.
Morning.

2
00:00:06,289 --> 00:00:09,022
I know how much you enjoy paperwork,
but don't hover.

3
00:00:09,228 --> 00:00:10,822
Nice bench.
Is that new?

4
00:00:10,965 --> 00:00:13,231
No, that's been there
since the '90s.

5
00:00:13,369 --> 00:00:15,032
What are you doing for
your birthday on Friday?

6
00:00:15,106 --> 00:00:16,905
Nothing. I never...

7
00:00:17,611 --> 00:00:18,841
Aha!

8
00:00:18,914 --> 00:00:19,939
Oh, God.

9
00:00:20,016 --> 00:00:21,712
Birthday,
birthday, birthday

10
00:00:21,786 --> 00:00:23,722
It's your birthday

11
00:00:23,790 --> 00:00:25,657
It's your birthday,
and I know when it is

12
00:00:25,727 --> 00:00:28,756
Ron refuses to tell anyone
when his birthday is.

13
00:00:28,834 --> 00:00:32,102
He's even had it redacted
on all government documents.

14
00:00:32,174 --> 00:00:34,941
Three years of investigations,
phone calls,

15
00:00:35,013 --> 00:00:38,247
Freedom of Information Act requests,
and still, I had nothing,

16
00:00:38,319 --> 00:00:43,591
until a well-placed bribe to a
gentleman at Baskin-Robbins revealed

17
00:00:44,798 --> 00:00:46,700
Ron's birthday is on Friday.

18
00:00:46,769 --> 00:00:48,568
Damn it. I was so careful.

19
00:00:48,640 --> 00:00:49,699
Well, you blew it.

20
00:00:49,775 --> 00:00:51,973
All for a free scoop
of Rum Raisin.

21
00:00:52,047 --> 00:00:54,347
Was it worth it,
Ron? Was it?

22
00:00:54,418 --> 00:00:56,547
I command you
to do nothing.

23
00:00:56,622 --> 00:00:58,251
I'm not gonna do nothing.
I'm gonna do something.

24
00:00:58,326 --> 00:00:59,487
And it's gonna
be really big.

25
00:00:59,561 --> 00:01:01,998
I have a lot of years
to make up for.

26
00:01:02,067 --> 00:01:05,233
I don't like loud noises
and people making a fuss,

27
00:01:05,307 --> 00:01:07,870
and I especially don't like
people celebrating

28
00:01:07,946 --> 00:01:11,909
because they know a piece of
private information about me.

29
00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:14,181
Plus, the whole thing
is a scam.

30
00:01:14,258 --> 00:01:17,993
Birthdays were invented
by Hallmark to sell cards.

31
00:01:39,341 --> 00:01:40,707
They put up a fence.

32
00:01:41,312 --> 00:01:42,439
Who?

33
00:01:42,781 --> 00:01:44,307
No!
What's that?

34
00:01:44,385 --> 00:01:47,414
There's a small park on the line
between Pawnee and Eagleton, and...

35
00:01:47,491 --> 00:01:50,793
Last night Eagleton put up
a fence around their side

36
00:01:50,865 --> 00:01:53,734
to keep us disgusting Pawnee
hobos off their precious land.

37
00:01:54,171 --> 00:01:57,473
There's even a security guard.
You got to show Eagleton I.D. to get in.

38
00:01:57,544 --> 00:01:59,514
Eagleton is a bunch
of rich snobs.

39
00:01:59,581 --> 00:02:01,744
And that's coming from
someone who has a Mercedes.

40
00:02:01,820 --> 00:02:04,757
With a Harman Kardon Logic
7 surround-sound system.

41
00:02:04,826 --> 00:02:07,023
Who builds a fence to keep
kids out of a playground?

42
00:02:07,097 --> 00:02:09,533
Three words,
Lindsay Carlisle Shay.

43
00:02:12,074 --> 00:02:13,099
Who?

44
00:02:13,709 --> 00:02:16,978
Lindsay Carlisle Shay and I
used to be best friends.

45
00:02:17,050 --> 00:02:19,782
We worked together at the
Pawnee Parks Department.

46
00:02:19,856 --> 00:02:21,883
Then she went to work
in Eagleton

47
00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:27,801
and "fixed her deviated septum" and
lost 35 pounds and lost something else.

48
00:02:27,872 --> 00:02:29,067
What was it again?

49
00:02:29,141 --> 00:02:30,803
Oh, yeah. Her soul.

50
00:02:30,878 --> 00:02:33,850
Is the Eagleton side really that
much better than the Pawnee side?

51
00:02:33,917 --> 00:02:35,317
To be fair, yeah.

52
00:02:35,386 --> 00:02:37,481
Our side is this scrappy
piece of land

53
00:02:37,557 --> 00:02:40,154
where kids go to smash
fluorescent light tubes.

54
00:02:40,230 --> 00:02:41,528
But it has a lot of heart.

55
00:02:41,599 --> 00:02:43,832
That's what people always
say when something sucks.

56
00:02:43,904 --> 00:02:45,429
We should stand up
for our town, okay?

57
00:02:45,507 --> 00:02:48,172
Pawneeans are just
as good as Eagletonians,

58
00:02:48,246 --> 00:02:50,648
although on average,
we are several inches shorter

59
00:02:50,717 --> 00:02:52,118
and 80 pounds heavier.

60
00:02:52,187 --> 00:02:54,954
People in Eagleton
are straight up mean to us.

61
00:02:55,026 --> 00:02:56,688
I would never set foot
over there.

62
00:02:56,762 --> 00:03:00,532
But it's the only place that I can get
my Bumble and Bumble hair care products,

63
00:03:00,603 --> 00:03:02,402
so I'm there
every eight days.

64
00:03:02,474 --> 00:03:04,911
Okay, well, I am on
"Operation No More Fence,"

65
00:03:04,979 --> 00:03:08,383
so I'm putting you in charge of "Operation
Ron's Party, colon, Shock And Awe."

66
00:03:08,452 --> 00:03:09,647
I am all over it.

67
00:03:09,721 --> 00:03:11,588
I just need you to do
what's on that list.

68
00:03:11,659 --> 00:03:14,928
Leslie has a lot of qualities
I find horrifying.

69
00:03:15,500 --> 00:03:19,440
But the worst one by far
is how thoughtful she can be.

70
00:03:19,508 --> 00:03:20,841
It's the only park
in our neighborhood.

71
00:03:20,911 --> 00:03:23,677
I mean, where are my kids
supposed to play, the rock quarry?

72
00:03:23,749 --> 00:03:24,877
There's rocks in there.

73
00:03:25,486 --> 00:03:28,617
Why don't we just set fire to the fence?
You know, set it ablaze.

74
00:03:28,793 --> 00:03:30,262
That's arson.

75
00:03:30,330 --> 00:03:33,359
Well, let's leave that up to the
lawyers. The point is, it would work.

76
00:03:33,436 --> 00:03:36,806
Why don't we build a fence
around their fence?

77
00:03:36,876 --> 00:03:40,440
Why?
It would give us two fences,

78
00:03:41,118 --> 00:03:44,682
so if they needed to get to their
fence for maintenance and whatnot,

79
00:03:44,758 --> 00:03:46,318
their pants might get caught.

80
00:03:46,395 --> 00:03:50,460
My son Joey tried to scale that
fence to play on the Eagleton side,

81
00:03:50,536 --> 00:03:52,403
and he fell
and hurt his arm.

82
00:03:52,507 --> 00:03:54,670
You need to get those people
to tear that fence down.

83
00:03:54,745 --> 00:03:55,907
This woman's right.

84
00:03:55,981 --> 00:03:59,579
I promise you,
citizens of Pawnee,

85
00:03:59,655 --> 00:04:01,420
and sweet, brave Joey,

86
00:04:01,492 --> 00:04:03,621
I will tear down
that fence.

87
00:04:04,899 --> 00:04:08,099
Okay, I'm just gonna suggest one
more time that we burn it down.

88
00:04:08,172 --> 00:04:09,937
But whatever
you guys think.

89
00:04:10,009 --> 00:04:11,443
Yeah. Great.

90
00:04:11,512 --> 00:04:12,811
Yes, hi.

91
00:04:12,882 --> 00:04:16,082
I have a question about
your inflatable saxophones.

92
00:04:16,823 --> 00:04:18,724
Do those come
in different sizes?

93
00:04:18,793 --> 00:04:20,855
I'm gonna need
about 40 dozen of those.

94
00:04:20,931 --> 00:04:24,028
Also, what about your
neon gangster fedora hats?

95
00:04:25,239 --> 00:04:26,366
That was rude.

96
00:04:26,442 --> 00:04:28,537
Whatever's going on here,
stop it immediately.

97
00:04:28,612 --> 00:04:29,705
I was just talking
on the phone.

98
00:04:29,781 --> 00:04:31,478
To whom?
It was personal.

99
00:04:31,552 --> 00:04:33,784
I would never make a work-related call.
You know that.

100
00:04:37,664 --> 00:04:40,101
Lindsay!
Leslie Knope.

101
00:04:40,169 --> 00:04:41,228
Hi.
Hi.

102
00:04:42,207 --> 00:04:43,505
Has it really been
five years?

103
00:04:43,576 --> 00:04:46,514
It has.
You look amazing.

104
00:04:46,582 --> 00:04:50,853
Thank you. This place hasn't changed
a bit. Still loveable, but grimy.

105
00:04:50,924 --> 00:04:54,090
Hello, there. I'm Ben Wyatt.
I'm assistant city manager...

106
00:04:54,164 --> 00:04:55,223
Hi, Dan.

107
00:04:55,868 --> 00:04:57,427
Ben.
It's not important.

108
00:04:57,504 --> 00:04:58,665
It won't come up again.

109
00:04:58,739 --> 00:05:01,302
This is Ann.
She is my best friend.

110
00:05:01,378 --> 00:05:02,641
Hi.
Now.

111
00:05:02,714 --> 00:05:04,981
And she's a nurse,
and she works at a hospital.

112
00:05:05,052 --> 00:05:06,042
Oh.

113
00:05:06,188 --> 00:05:09,160
Nice to meet you. I'm sorry.
It's just, nursing...

114
00:05:09,227 --> 00:05:11,720
You must be
so tired and sad.

115
00:05:11,799 --> 00:05:15,102
It's really nice outside.
Shall we speak in my courtyard?

116
00:05:15,173 --> 00:05:16,607
Yeah.

117
00:05:17,544 --> 00:05:19,913
Well, thank you so much
for stopping by.

118
00:05:19,982 --> 00:05:21,780
I was passing through
Pawnee anyway.

119
00:05:21,853 --> 00:05:23,719
I do a lot of charity
work here.

120
00:05:23,789 --> 00:05:25,656
There's only so much
you can do.

121
00:05:25,726 --> 00:05:29,598
You know, I found a picture
of you from back in the day.

122
00:05:30,770 --> 00:05:31,795
Oh.

123
00:05:31,873 --> 00:05:33,102
Look at that.

124
00:05:33,175 --> 00:05:34,609
Let me get a closer look.

125
00:05:37,317 --> 00:05:38,808
So let's talk
about Lafayette Park.

126
00:05:38,887 --> 00:05:40,753
Oh, yes. The fence.

127
00:05:41,158 --> 00:05:43,025
I'm only trying
to protect our children.

128
00:05:43,095 --> 00:05:44,894
Come on, Lindsay,
this isn't you.

129
00:05:45,566 --> 00:05:46,830
When we used to work
here together,

130
00:05:46,903 --> 00:05:48,998
we loved the fact
that parks were for everyone.

131
00:05:49,074 --> 00:05:50,372
That's what makes
them so great.

132
00:05:50,443 --> 00:05:51,672
You know what's
really great?

133
00:05:51,745 --> 00:05:54,273
A private park
that's not for everyone.

134
00:05:54,351 --> 00:05:56,344
Wowsers.
What do you care?

135
00:05:56,421 --> 00:05:57,947
It's just a crappy
little park.

136
00:05:58,025 --> 00:05:59,516
Well, someone
once told me

137
00:05:59,594 --> 00:06:01,621
that there's no such thing
as small parks,

138
00:06:01,698 --> 00:06:02,688
just small ideas.

139
00:06:02,767 --> 00:06:03,757
Hmm.

140
00:06:03,870 --> 00:06:05,463
And that someone

141
00:06:05,540 --> 00:06:07,066
was this woman.

142
00:06:07,744 --> 00:06:11,275
You can take it if you want.
I have many copies and the negatives.

143
00:06:11,351 --> 00:06:12,478
And I have a JPEG:

144
00:06:12,855 --> 00:06:14,619
The fence stays up.

145
00:06:15,192 --> 00:06:16,660
Lindsay, if we...
Sweetie,

146
00:06:16,728 --> 00:06:18,425
and I mean this
in the nicest possible way,

147
00:06:18,499 --> 00:06:21,335
Pawnee is and always will be
a dirty, little nightmare

148
00:06:21,405 --> 00:06:23,500
from which you will
never wake up.

149
00:06:24,845 --> 00:06:25,938
But it was good
seeing you.

150
00:06:28,619 --> 00:06:30,852
What? I'm not asleep.
I'm awake.

151
00:06:30,924 --> 00:06:33,554
I'm wide awake,
and I got my eyes on you.

152
00:06:33,629 --> 00:06:37,535
That's what I would've said if I
had thought of it in the moment.

153
00:06:38,305 --> 00:06:39,899
What did I say instead?

154
00:06:42,447 --> 00:06:44,576
Wow! This is where
they have their public forums?

155
00:06:44,684 --> 00:06:46,051
Yeah, it's not
that great.

156
00:06:46,121 --> 00:06:47,419
They had a valet.

157
00:06:47,490 --> 00:06:49,426
Yes, Eagleton is
nicer than Pawnee.

158
00:06:49,494 --> 00:06:52,990
And, yes, because of their cupcake factory,
the air always smells like vanilla.

159
00:06:54,304 --> 00:06:55,704
Oh, yeah.
Wow.

160
00:06:56,541 --> 00:06:58,944
But their people are not
inherently better than our people.

161
00:06:59,014 --> 00:07:02,009
The only thing they beat us in is
life expectancy, beauty pageants,

162
00:07:02,086 --> 00:07:03,748
and average income.
Who cares?

163
00:07:03,823 --> 00:07:05,052
Factoid alert.

164
00:07:05,126 --> 00:07:07,426
Eagleton was founded
by former Pawneeans.

165
00:07:08,032 --> 00:07:10,696
Pawnee was established
in May of 1817.

166
00:07:10,770 --> 00:07:12,069
And by July,

167
00:07:12,140 --> 00:07:14,770
finding the smell unpleasant
and the soil untenable,

168
00:07:14,879 --> 00:07:17,976
all the wealthy people
evacuated to Eagleton.

169
00:07:19,554 --> 00:07:20,921
Hello, Pawnee.

170
00:07:21,425 --> 00:07:23,588
Welcome to our public forum.

171
00:07:23,662 --> 00:07:25,826
Hi, I'm Thomas
Montgomery Haverford.

172
00:07:25,901 --> 00:07:28,235
Okay.
Well, nice outfit.

173
00:07:28,305 --> 00:07:29,739
What, did you just come
from the stables?

174
00:07:30,309 --> 00:07:32,906
Yes. I was just
at the stables.

175
00:07:32,981 --> 00:07:35,008
You look like
you've been working hard.

176
00:07:35,086 --> 00:07:36,953
You have a million
fly-aways right now.

177
00:07:37,023 --> 00:07:39,220
Would you like to borrow
a mirror or a self-help book?

178
00:07:39,294 --> 00:07:40,284
I would not.

179
00:07:40,362 --> 00:07:42,423
I would like you to get off
your high horse, Lindsay.

180
00:07:42,500 --> 00:07:43,695
Pun intended.

181
00:07:43,769 --> 00:07:46,673
You know if I had your job,
there would be no fence there.

182
00:07:46,742 --> 00:07:49,270
Well, you don't have my job because
you knew you couldn't handle it.

183
00:07:50,449 --> 00:07:51,941
The forum is beginning.

184
00:07:52,019 --> 00:07:53,989
We've got a little bit
of Eagleton business,

185
00:07:54,057 --> 00:07:56,084
and then I'll introduce you.
Great.

186
00:07:56,628 --> 00:07:58,188
Look how pretty
the people are.

187
00:07:59,134 --> 00:08:00,329
Hey, Ron.

188
00:08:00,402 --> 00:08:01,768
How's the street parking
at your house?

189
00:08:01,839 --> 00:08:02,829
What?

190
00:08:02,908 --> 00:08:05,880
Can you handle, like, 20 cars
or a double-decker party bus?

191
00:08:06,414 --> 00:08:09,045
There is no street parking
at my house.

192
00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:10,588
My house is not even
on a street.

193
00:08:10,656 --> 00:08:14,096
Do you have space
for, like, a huge circus tent?

194
00:08:15,633 --> 00:08:18,571
Hey, Ron. Have you seen...
What the hell?

195
00:08:18,739 --> 00:08:19,764
No!

196
00:08:20,609 --> 00:08:21,634
Oh!

197
00:08:21,711 --> 00:08:24,706
Well, looks like there won't be
any balloons for the birthday boy.

198
00:08:24,784 --> 00:08:27,312
These were for a sick child
at the hospital.

199
00:08:28,225 --> 00:08:29,488
My office, now.

200
00:08:29,561 --> 00:08:31,724
I don't work for you.
Don't care.

201
00:08:32,366 --> 00:08:33,800
Decisions, decisions.

202
00:08:34,404 --> 00:08:38,071
I think I'm gonna go with the porcini
mushrooms and boursin, s'il vous plaît.

203
00:08:38,145 --> 00:08:42,017
that the Eagleton-Pawnee fence
does a lot more harm than it does good.

204
00:08:42,787 --> 00:08:45,885
Hello. I'm Bertram Rolands,
a citizen of Eagleton.

205
00:08:48,765 --> 00:08:50,530
With all due respect,
Ms. Knope,

206
00:08:50,603 --> 00:08:53,200
can't you just clean up
your side of the park,

207
00:08:53,275 --> 00:08:54,436
put some new equipment there?

208
00:08:54,510 --> 00:08:55,739
Well, we would love
to do that,

209
00:08:55,814 --> 00:08:58,751
but, unfortunately,
money is tight right now.

210
00:08:59,454 --> 00:09:00,855
Hello. I'm Christine Porter.

211
00:09:04,564 --> 00:09:07,536
I want to respectfully say
that I'm in favor of the fence.

212
00:09:07,603 --> 00:09:10,507
I see it as a kind
of punishment for Pawnee

213
00:09:10,576 --> 00:09:13,776
that might inspire your
town to clean up its act.

214
00:09:15,486 --> 00:09:17,479
Well, I would like
to respectfully say

215
00:09:17,556 --> 00:09:20,551
that any child should be able
to play in any park,

216
00:09:20,629 --> 00:09:23,066
regardless of wealth
or status.

217
00:09:27,677 --> 00:09:30,376
Anyway, this is
Joey Plunkett.

218
00:09:30,449 --> 00:09:32,146
Joey, wave to the audience.

219
00:09:32,219 --> 00:09:34,918
Oh, you can't, because
you broke your arm

220
00:09:35,259 --> 00:09:36,522
climbing that fence.

221
00:09:36,594 --> 00:09:38,929
I can wave with this arm.
No, you can't.

222
00:09:39,434 --> 00:09:41,131
Both your arms are broken.

223
00:09:41,204 --> 00:09:42,969
All due respect,
I recognize that boy.

224
00:09:43,041 --> 00:09:46,207
He was caught selling
fireworks to Eagleton kids.

225
00:09:46,648 --> 00:09:48,709
Well, with more due respect,

226
00:09:48,785 --> 00:09:51,986
a lot of boys do that in our town.
You cannot be sure that he is the one.

227
00:09:52,059 --> 00:09:55,429
This is a perfect example of
how we're going to help you.

228
00:09:55,499 --> 00:09:57,834
Here's to you, Joey,
and your mother

229
00:09:57,904 --> 00:10:01,638
and to every Pawnee citizen
who might have a bright future

230
00:10:01,711 --> 00:10:04,808
if they fundamentally change
everything about themselves.

231
00:10:05,920 --> 00:10:07,513
Thanks to Leslie Knope.
I'm not done.

232
00:10:07,590 --> 00:10:09,787
Isn't she trying
her hardest?

233
00:10:11,698 --> 00:10:15,468
So cute and so good.

234
00:10:15,539 --> 00:10:17,634
I'm only gonna ask
you this once.

235
00:10:17,710 --> 00:10:19,304
What is going on
with my birthday?

236
00:10:19,380 --> 00:10:21,407
Oh, my God. Ron,
it's your birthday.

237
00:10:21,484 --> 00:10:23,716
Happy Birthday.
Shut your damn mouth.

238
00:10:23,789 --> 00:10:25,349
This is a fun conversation.

239
00:10:25,426 --> 00:10:27,453
Just tell me what
Leslie is planning.

240
00:10:27,530 --> 00:10:30,525
Honestly, I don't know.
I haven't heard anything.

241
00:10:30,602 --> 00:10:33,073
Why don't you tell me what she
did for your last birthday?

242
00:10:33,141 --> 00:10:35,043
Oh, well,
that was intense.

243
00:10:35,112 --> 00:10:36,637
She totally surprised me.

244
00:10:36,714 --> 00:10:38,183
She kidnapped me
from work,

245
00:10:38,251 --> 00:10:40,187
and then she took me
to that place, Señor Vega's,

246
00:10:40,255 --> 00:10:41,884
you know, where
the mariachi band comes out.

247
00:10:41,959 --> 00:10:44,897
They put a big sombrero on you, and
then everybody sings "Happy Birthday"?

248
00:10:44,965 --> 00:10:46,024
Damn it.

249
00:10:46,101 --> 00:10:47,364
And then we went
back to my house,

250
00:10:47,436 --> 00:10:50,067
and she invited
basically everyone I knew,

251
00:10:50,142 --> 00:10:52,704
and she had this great guy
doing face painting,

252
00:10:52,780 --> 00:10:55,217
and I had my face painted
like a fairy tiger.

253
00:10:55,285 --> 00:10:56,514
Ugh.

254
00:10:56,688 --> 00:10:58,385
Also, she did it, like,
a week before my birthday,

255
00:10:58,458 --> 00:11:00,952
which is genius,
'cause I had no idea it was coming.

256
00:11:01,030 --> 00:11:03,432
And then there was
a bouncy castle.

257
00:11:03,502 --> 00:11:05,665
Did you know they made
those for adults?

258
00:11:05,739 --> 00:11:06,729
Mmm-hmm.

259
00:11:07,243 --> 00:11:10,113
Maybe I'll change it up this time.
Can I try the andouille sausage?

260
00:11:10,182 --> 00:11:11,981
Tom, let's go.
What? No.

261
00:11:12,888 --> 00:11:14,858
Hey, not you too.

262
00:11:15,860 --> 00:11:18,228
It's gross. I don't like it.
It's disgusting.

263
00:11:19,400 --> 00:11:21,302
Did you guys get
your public forum gift bag?

264
00:11:21,371 --> 00:11:22,965
There's an iPod touch in here.

265
00:11:23,441 --> 00:11:26,208
Man, she used to not be like this.
Eagleton really changed her.

266
00:11:26,281 --> 00:11:29,082
Yeah, what exactly happened
between the two of you, anyway?

267
00:11:29,153 --> 00:11:31,680
Five years ago, Eagleton
offered me that job.

268
00:11:31,758 --> 00:11:34,025
And you said no?
Are you insane?

269
00:11:34,096 --> 00:11:36,123
I talked it over with Lindsay,
and we made a pact

270
00:11:36,201 --> 00:11:38,228
that we would stay
in Pawnee together

271
00:11:38,605 --> 00:11:42,636
and work hard and fight to make
Pawnee a better place to live.

272
00:11:43,315 --> 00:11:47,085
And then they offered her the job,
and she took it and disappeared.

273
00:11:47,156 --> 00:11:48,181
Wow.

274
00:11:48,258 --> 00:11:51,253
Verbena-scented soy candles!

275
00:11:53,001 --> 00:11:54,731
You want me
to do what, now?

276
00:11:54,804 --> 00:11:58,870
Send Leslie somewhere on an assignment,
a conference or something,

277
00:11:58,946 --> 00:12:02,043
and make her take April and
freeze their bank accounts.

278
00:12:02,152 --> 00:12:04,919
I don't understand.
Is Leslie's work unsatisfactory?

279
00:12:04,992 --> 00:12:06,859
No, it has nothing to do
with her work.

280
00:12:07,596 --> 00:12:09,088
I don't want
to get into it.

281
00:12:09,433 --> 00:12:11,699
Ron, look,
this is me, okay?

282
00:12:12,072 --> 00:12:14,099
You know you can talk
to me about anything.

283
00:12:14,176 --> 00:12:17,911
Well, it's my birthday
on Friday.

284
00:12:17,984 --> 00:12:20,250
Hey! Happy Birthday.

285
00:12:23,495 --> 00:12:27,094
I'm ending this right now.
I'm just gonna leave early and go home.

286
00:12:28,605 --> 00:12:30,268
Unless...

287
00:12:30,342 --> 00:12:32,574
That's exactly what
she wants me to do.

288
00:12:34,885 --> 00:12:37,219
All right, everybody
just grab a bag and open it up

289
00:12:37,623 --> 00:12:39,856
and then try to find
some dirty stuff in there.

290
00:12:39,928 --> 00:12:40,953
What are you doing?

291
00:12:41,030 --> 00:12:43,694
Eagleton treats us like garbage.
We're gonna treat them like garbage.

292
00:12:43,768 --> 00:12:45,328
We're gonna take
these bags of trash,

293
00:12:45,405 --> 00:12:47,136
and we're gonna throw it over
to their side of the park.

294
00:12:47,209 --> 00:12:50,238
And then we're just gonna let the
stink and the raccoons run wild.

295
00:12:50,716 --> 00:12:53,119
Well, isn't that just playing
right into what they think of you?

296
00:12:55,525 --> 00:12:58,759
Oh, my God. What am I thinking?
Let's just stop this.

297
00:12:59,233 --> 00:13:00,258
Put everything
back in the truck.

298
00:13:00,335 --> 00:13:01,929
Let's back it up.
No, no, no, no.

299
00:13:02,005 --> 00:13:03,975
Leslie, you promised we could
throw garbage everywhere.

300
00:13:04,377 --> 00:13:05,504
Wow.

301
00:13:05,579 --> 00:13:08,517
I didn't expect to see the
whole Parks Department here,

302
00:13:08,585 --> 00:13:11,888
although it is, sadly,
one of the nicest spots in town.

303
00:13:11,959 --> 00:13:13,929
I am so sick
of this, Lindsay.

304
00:13:13,996 --> 00:13:16,159
Wait, Leslie.
I've got this.

305
00:13:16,667 --> 00:13:19,400
You listen to me,
Lindsay Carlisle Shay.

306
00:13:19,473 --> 00:13:21,136
Why don't you take
your fancy dog,

307
00:13:21,210 --> 00:13:22,542
get in your Escalade,

308
00:13:22,613 --> 00:13:24,480
and if you have
any job openings,

309
00:13:24,550 --> 00:13:25,779
maybe you should let
me know about 'em.

310
00:13:25,853 --> 00:13:27,481
Come on, man.
No!

311
00:13:27,957 --> 00:13:29,391
I'm sick of
being treated

312
00:13:29,460 --> 00:13:33,332
like I'm not willing to relocate
to Eagleton, because I am!

313
00:13:33,869 --> 00:13:36,203
So here's what
you could do, lady.

314
00:13:36,842 --> 00:13:38,333
Take this resume

315
00:13:38,411 --> 00:13:41,315
and shove it into
your human resources slot.

316
00:13:42,786 --> 00:13:45,121
Oh, yeah!
Shove it there!

317
00:13:45,192 --> 00:13:46,182
No.

318
00:13:46,327 --> 00:13:50,427
You might have a fancy car
and a mahogany purse,

319
00:13:50,502 --> 00:13:51,903
or whatever rich people have,

320
00:13:51,972 --> 00:13:54,272
but I remember something
that you're trying to forget.

321
00:13:54,343 --> 00:13:56,210
You're a Pawnee girl.

322
00:13:56,714 --> 00:13:59,083
No, Leslie, I'm not.

323
00:13:59,153 --> 00:14:00,519
Well, then why do you
come here at dinnertime

324
00:14:00,589 --> 00:14:02,752
and get takeout from the
legendary J.J.'s Diner?

325
00:14:03,428 --> 00:14:04,691
It's not for me.

326
00:14:05,031 --> 00:14:07,661
These waffles make
great dog laxatives.

327
00:14:07,736 --> 00:14:09,296
Don't you dare

328
00:14:10,041 --> 00:14:12,511
feed that waffle to that dog
to get it to poop.

329
00:14:14,250 --> 00:14:15,548
Sambuca need to make?

330
00:14:15,619 --> 00:14:16,952
There you go.

331
00:14:17,723 --> 00:14:19,056
Leslie.
How dare you?

332
00:14:19,126 --> 00:14:20,526
No!
- Get her, Leslie!

333
00:14:20,595 --> 00:14:22,394
No!

334
00:14:24,537 --> 00:14:26,336
Garbage fight!

335
00:14:26,407 --> 00:14:27,397
Ugh!