and last but not least,
tonight is our yearly
White Elephant Gift Exchange.
Whoo!
Hear that, sugar plums?
White Elephant!
You all know Muscle Man
brings it with the gifts!
I'm gonna start bringing in
the holiday cheer right now!
Whoo-hoo!
Whoo! Whoo!
Benson, you've got to
call off the White Elephant.
Yeah. You know Muscle Man
always pranks us
by getting terrible gifts.
Every year,
his gifts ruin Christmas!
Yeah! I love the guy, but
he doesn't know when to quit.
You remember
the glove incident.
Don't remind me.
Every time you think you're
gonna get something you want,
then, bam!
Muscle Man swoops in,
steals your good gift, and
you're stuck with his prank one.
But this year's
gonna be different.
This year, we're gonna
give him the horrible gifts.
Really? Okay.
Nice!
But there's
no way of knowing
if he'll pick
the right gift.
It's impossible to rig it.
It's not
impossible
if the odds are stacked
in your favor.
What do you mean?
I mean I've got a plan.
The order of the White
Elephant Gift Exchange
is decided by picking random
numbers out of a hat.
Next up is number 6!
Ohhh! Lucky number 6!
But what if it wasn't random?
What if we write
the exact same number
on every slip of paper,
pretend to have
our numbers called?
Lucky number 6!
I wonder what it could be.
Yes. What could it be?
What's something Muscle Man
wouldn't want to steal?
Something even he would find
absolutely horrible?
Deodorant.
Oh, a new tie
A Hugstable doll?
Close but no.
Aww. Salad accessories?
Yes, salad accessories!
It's a known fact
that Muscle Man
hates anything
salad-related.
Ohh!
Keep doing this
gift after gift.
Nothing but salad accessories
until Muscle Man
is the only one
left in the game
who hasn't stolen anything...
Blech!
leaving him no choice
but to pick
the last remaining gift
we set up for him.
And when he goes
to open the gift...
Yeah? Yeah?
I don't know. I haven't
thought that far ahead.
Awww!
That's where
you guys come in.
I already bought
all the salad stuff.
We just need to find
something that will make
the worst possible gift
for Muscle Man.
Hm-hm!
With pleasure.
Yeah. We could
totally do that!
All right, then.
Let's split up and get shopping.
We're out for revenge here,
people, so go, go, go!
Ha ha!
What about
this?
Can't get worse
than expired tuna!
Isn't that a bit much?
No way!
Remember what he did to you
in last year's
White Elephant?
Oh, it's perfect!
It looks just like
the S.S. Constantinople!
I was hoping
you'd pick
that one, Pops.
I love it.
not so fast, Pops.
It's my turn now,
and I choose to steal...
this gift!
Don't worry, Pops.
It's all part of the game.
Now you get to open
the last gift.
Oh!
Ooh! What on Earth is this?
Eww!
It used to be ranch dressing,
20 years ago.
Now, boom!
Brand-new paper weight.
You there,
what's the worst expired
food item you've got?
Oh, dude!
We got to get this!
I don't know. Don't you think
this is too harsh?
Oh, so Muscle Man's gifts
were never too harsh?
Itching powder in the sweater.
Classic White Elephant gift.
My eyes!
It's in my eyes!
You're right.
It's not harsh at all.
Let's buy it.
How much?
$500 for the day.
Benson, do you really want
to go through with this?
Wow!
These gloves are great!
Do you think so?
Yeah, they're so soft!
Do you really think so?
Yeah, I do! Why?
Because they're made
of my old underwear!
Nooo!
I didn't want
to retire at 65 anyway.
Pleasure doing
business with you.
Man.
Which one
should we give him?
I don't know
which one's worse.
All of them.
All of them!
Put all of them together.
Now!
Okay, okay, okay.
Cool it. He's here.
Happy White Elephant, Benson!
['JINGLE BELLS"
CONTINUES PLAYING]
Geez. What's with
all the salad stuff?
You guys on a diet
or something?
All right, everybody.
We're down to
the last two gifts.
I wonder what they could be.
Next up is number 6!
Ohhh! Lucky number 6!
Rigby, come on up
and pick your gift!
Hmm.
Which one?
Good choice, bro.
Yeah, I know.
Good. I know you know.
Well, I know you know I know.
Just open it!
Open it.
Huh?
A new TV?
Happy White Elephant, bro!
Oh. What?
What?
Okay. What's the deal,
Muscle Man?
What are you
talking about, bro?
Come on.
We know this is a prank.
Yeah! Is this thing
gonna electrocute me
if I plug it in
or something?
No, bro!
It's not a prank!
It's an honest-to-goodness
flat-screen TV.
Look,
I admit I haven't been the
best White Elephant participant
in the last few years.
Some of you may have even
called my pranks harsh
or out of line.
And I thought this gift
would bring us
closer together,
'cause you guys
are like my family.
That's what the holidays
are all about.
Family.
Anyways,
since there's nothing good
left to steal,
I'll just
take this one.
Mordecai, Rigby,
others,
you have ruined
the spirit
of the White Elephant
Gift Exchange.
Now you get to spend
all of eternity
in my temple of gifts.
P.S. You don't get
to open the gifts.
Aw, man!
Look, I know we went
a little overboard
with the prank gift
for Muscle Man,
but did you see
the ones he gave us?
The ranch dressing, sweaters,
the underwear gloves?
I could go on.
You're not supposed
to get gifts you like.
You're supposed to give
gifts you don't like.
That's what makes it fun.
Except you had to go
and rig the game
and get revenge.
Well,
I hope you're happy
with yourselves.
I guess he's right.
Maybe we got
too hung up on it.
It really is just
a silly game, after all.
And he did give us
that sweet TV.
Yeah. Muscle Man was just
trying to have a good time,
and maybe that's what
we should do, too.
Mr. White Elephant,
sir...
Yes?
send us back so
we can stop Muscle Man
from opening
that gift.
Well, I don't know.
I've never really
done that before.
I suppose you could go home,
or you could see
what's in this box.
Can we see
what's in it first?
Oww!
No, thanks.
I think we'll
just go home.
Fine.
Muscle Man, wait.
What is it, bro?
The truth isâ€”
Benson, wait!
It's not a TV!
It's just a box full
of old Chinese food!
What?
Huh?
Gotcha, bros!
Heartfelt speech
gets 'em every time!
What were you
gonna say, Benson?
Enjoy opening
that gift.
Okay, bro.
Now, this is fun!