1 00:00:08,180 --> 00:00:10,975 Okay, okay, wait. You have to wait for everyone else to play too. 2 00:00:11,058 --> 00:00:13,143 We only have so many balloons. 3 00:00:13,769 --> 00:00:17,439 Adam, would you do Daddy a favor and get the root beer from the kitchen for me? 4 00:00:17,523 --> 00:00:19,441 - Yeah. - Thank you. 5 00:00:28,033 --> 00:00:30,995 - Got the root beer. - Thanks, Adam. 6 00:00:34,957 --> 00:00:38,836 - Happy Birthday. - Oh, yeah. Thanks. 7 00:00:40,754 --> 00:00:44,758 Adam is the birthday boy. This is your child, he's Adam's friend. 8 00:00:45,885 --> 00:00:48,304 And this is Adam's birthday gift. 9 00:00:50,681 --> 00:00:52,057 Adam was turning nine 10 00:00:52,141 --> 00:00:56,061 and I realized I hadn't thrown him a single birthday party. 11 00:01:01,317 --> 00:01:02,359 To save money 12 00:01:02,443 --> 00:01:06,447 it was suggested I use background actors for all the party guests. 13 00:01:06,530 --> 00:01:08,657 But I only remember once they showed up 14 00:01:08,741 --> 00:01:11,660 that union rules prohibit extras from speaking. 15 00:01:12,077 --> 00:01:14,747 I guess they say gluten-free is, like, healthier. 16 00:01:14,830 --> 00:01:16,874 So… yeah. 17 00:01:24,173 --> 00:01:27,426 Right. I'll let you get back to… Yeah. 18 00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:29,887 I guess when normal shows do stuff like this, 19 00:01:30,262 --> 00:01:32,890 they add fake party chatter in post-production. 20 00:01:33,682 --> 00:01:36,810 But when the point is to actually experience it in the moment, 21 00:01:36,894 --> 00:01:38,020 it doesn't quite work. 22 00:01:45,069 --> 00:01:48,364 You guys can… you can clap. Yeah. 23 00:01:48,447 --> 00:01:50,324 It wasn't the most realistic party 24 00:01:50,657 --> 00:01:53,243 but it saved us over fifteen thousand dollars. 25 00:01:53,744 --> 00:01:57,456 And most importantly, Adam seemed to be having a blast. 26 00:02:07,549 --> 00:02:09,259 Like he's mixing the two together, 27 00:02:09,343 --> 00:02:13,013 like Christmas and, like, Christmas trees and Hanukkah. 28 00:02:13,097 --> 00:02:15,224 Now that the six-year-old actors were done, 29 00:02:15,307 --> 00:02:19,186 one of the mothers requested I unravel some of the stuff her son had learned 30 00:02:19,269 --> 00:02:20,437 during the rehearsal. 31 00:02:20,521 --> 00:02:22,648 - He's the… - Jesus is almighty. 32 00:02:22,731 --> 00:02:24,691 Jesus is… You accept him as… 33 00:02:25,401 --> 00:02:27,027 - Our savior. - Our savior. 34 00:02:27,111 --> 00:02:28,278 - Your savior. - Our king. 35 00:02:28,362 --> 00:02:29,988 He is the savior and the king. 36 00:02:30,072 --> 00:02:33,367 And Judaism is just some, like, pretend thing. 37 00:02:34,451 --> 00:02:37,996 You should be excited to be Christian because you get to go heaven, 38 00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:42,459 but I have to go to hell as a Jew and so you should not wanna be Jewish 39 00:02:42,543 --> 00:02:47,881 because you'll suffer like me and I'll burn. 40 00:02:49,424 --> 00:02:50,634 Yeah. 41 00:02:50,717 --> 00:02:53,929 With everything, I was having to deal with behind the scenes, 42 00:02:54,012 --> 00:02:57,099 I was starting to feel like I was constantly being pulled away 43 00:02:57,182 --> 00:03:01,395 from the experienceof fatherhood, I was hoping to rehearse. 44 00:03:02,688 --> 00:03:07,067 During the party, there was one child actor who played Adam at age six 45 00:03:07,151 --> 00:03:08,986 that kept sneaking back into the home 46 00:03:09,069 --> 00:03:11,905 after the nine-year-old had already taken over. 47 00:03:12,781 --> 00:03:14,199 It was the end of his final day 48 00:03:14,283 --> 00:03:17,202 and he was refusing to change out of his Adam wardrobe. 49 00:03:17,578 --> 00:03:20,414 - No! - Come on, let's go change your clothes. 50 00:03:20,497 --> 00:03:24,501 - I don't wanna leave. - It's okay. 51 00:03:27,921 --> 00:03:29,756 - You wanna give him a hug? - You wanna hug and… 52 00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:31,758 I could see… We'll see… 53 00:03:31,842 --> 00:03:33,886 We'll see, we're gonna come back and see him again. 54 00:03:33,969 --> 00:03:36,388 Yeah, yeah, I can see you. Oh, it's okay. 55 00:03:36,471 --> 00:03:38,390 - Give him a hug. - It's okay. We'll see you again. 56 00:03:38,473 --> 00:03:40,517 We'll see each other again. 57 00:03:40,601 --> 00:03:41,852 His name was Remy. 58 00:03:41,935 --> 00:03:44,980 And if I'm being honest, out of all the kids in this project, 59 00:03:45,397 --> 00:03:47,816 I sort of got along with him the most. 60 00:03:47,900 --> 00:03:49,818 I'm here to see the doctor. 61 00:03:49,902 --> 00:03:52,321 I'm Doctor Fart, come have a seat. 62 00:03:52,404 --> 00:03:53,780 Okay, thank you. 63 00:03:59,119 --> 00:04:02,205 I assumed he was just having a normal kid tantrum. 64 00:04:02,289 --> 00:04:03,457 - Hey. - I don't wanna leave. 65 00:04:03,540 --> 00:04:05,959 Okay, but listen, here's the thing, we have to leave. 66 00:04:06,043 --> 00:04:10,589 But then, his mom Amber gave me some insight as to what might be going on. 67 00:04:10,672 --> 00:04:13,175 Now that he's getting older, he sees other kids with dads 68 00:04:13,258 --> 00:04:15,052 and at school, there's dads picking up their kids, 69 00:04:15,135 --> 00:04:18,513 and he's definitely wondering, where's mine? 70 00:04:19,348 --> 00:04:21,725 - Oh, really? - Yeah. It's really tough. 71 00:04:22,184 --> 00:04:23,685 This morning, I was explaining to him, 72 00:04:23,769 --> 00:04:26,563 "You know, you're gonna be Adam today, you're gonna have a birthday party." 73 00:04:26,647 --> 00:04:29,191 And, you know, he's like, "Oh, is my pretend daddy gonna be there?" 74 00:04:29,274 --> 00:04:32,319 I said, "Yeah," and he goes, "My pretend daddy loves me." 75 00:04:32,402 --> 00:04:33,654 And I was like… 76 00:04:34,196 --> 00:04:37,741 My heart literally broke into a million pieces like… 77 00:04:38,116 --> 00:04:39,868 Actually, even talking about it, I could almost cry 78 00:04:39,951 --> 00:04:42,120 just 'cause I feel bad for him but… 79 00:04:42,204 --> 00:04:43,538 Yeah, it is what it is. 80 00:04:43,622 --> 00:04:44,873 Are you gonna say bye? 81 00:04:45,457 --> 00:04:49,711 - Bye, I don't wanna leave you. - It's okay. 82 00:04:50,712 --> 00:04:53,548 It's okay. We'll see each other soon. 83 00:04:54,675 --> 00:04:55,926 I'm sure, okay? 84 00:04:57,427 --> 00:04:59,262 Okay. 85 00:04:59,763 --> 00:05:00,806 All right, guys. 86 00:05:01,348 --> 00:05:02,808 - Thank you. - It's okay. 87 00:05:03,392 --> 00:05:04,476 And after that, 88 00:05:04,559 --> 00:05:08,480 I found myself struggling to transfer my emotions to the new Adam. 89 00:05:08,563 --> 00:05:13,485 Hey, Dad. That party was so fun. I got to see all my friends. 90 00:05:14,111 --> 00:05:16,279 Glad you had a good time. 91 00:05:16,780 --> 00:05:19,282 You're the best dad. I love you. 92 00:05:20,575 --> 00:05:22,119 I love you too. 93 00:05:26,706 --> 00:05:29,751 I'm gonna go back to playing. 94 00:05:32,587 --> 00:05:34,297 - All right. - Bye, Dad. 95 00:05:34,714 --> 00:05:36,007 Bye. 96 00:05:37,217 --> 00:05:40,178 I had enrolled Adam in a Jewish elementary school 97 00:05:40,262 --> 00:05:43,014 to continue his spiritual learning. 98 00:05:43,098 --> 00:05:45,142 It made me feel like a good Jew. 99 00:05:45,225 --> 00:05:47,519 Even though I knew the moment I looked away 100 00:05:47,853 --> 00:05:50,856 his real parents would pull up and intercept him, 101 00:05:50,939 --> 00:05:53,567 so they could take him to his real school. 102 00:05:54,442 --> 00:05:56,862 I planned several challenges for myself 103 00:05:56,945 --> 00:05:59,322 that I feltn a real parent might face. 104 00:05:59,906 --> 00:06:03,660 So, at 4 p.m., when he was brought back for me to pick up, 105 00:06:03,743 --> 00:06:08,206 the actors were instructed to launch into a scenario I had scripted. 106 00:06:08,290 --> 00:06:11,626 Hey, Adam. I'm having a sleepover this weekend. 107 00:06:11,710 --> 00:06:14,838 - You wanna come? - Sure. 108 00:06:15,589 --> 00:06:18,842 Well, you're not invited. So how are you gonna come then? 109 00:06:18,925 --> 00:06:20,468 Don't cry, Adam. 110 00:06:21,469 --> 00:06:22,929 My hopen was that I could practice 111 00:06:23,013 --> 00:06:26,850 counseling my child through a complex emotional experience, 112 00:06:26,933 --> 00:06:30,645 an area where I fear as a real father, I may fall short. 113 00:06:30,729 --> 00:06:32,939 I wanted to go to that sleepover. 114 00:06:33,690 --> 00:06:36,735 You really want to be friends with those guys? 115 00:06:38,987 --> 00:06:42,282 Maybe next time they ask you to hang out you should just say no. 116 00:06:44,242 --> 00:06:46,745 - You wanna practice that? - Sure. 117 00:06:47,787 --> 00:06:50,582 Hey, Adam, you want to come to my sleepover? 118 00:06:50,665 --> 00:06:52,000 No, thanks. 119 00:06:52,667 --> 00:06:53,793 Good. 120 00:06:54,377 --> 00:06:57,088 See now, they don't have any power over you. 121 00:06:58,173 --> 00:07:02,302 Right? You're in control because you don't want anything from them. 122 00:07:02,636 --> 00:07:04,429 You don't want their friendship. 123 00:07:04,888 --> 00:07:10,310 But I was starting to feel like I was just solving a puzzle of my own design. 124 00:07:12,520 --> 00:07:13,688 Thanks, Dad. 125 00:07:14,773 --> 00:07:15,982 No problem. 126 00:07:17,651 --> 00:07:22,238 And instead of being present with my son, my mind was elsewhere. 127 00:07:23,907 --> 00:07:28,995 I spent a week with a child who had no dad, pretending that I was his dad. 128 00:07:29,079 --> 00:07:30,538 What's the guy's name in the house? 129 00:07:32,457 --> 00:07:33,500 Daddy. 130 00:07:33,583 --> 00:07:35,293 What did I think was gonna happen? 131 00:07:35,377 --> 00:07:38,213 I love you, Daddy. 132 00:07:38,546 --> 00:07:41,424 - What did you say? - I love you, Daddy. 133 00:07:41,508 --> 00:07:44,177 I love you too, Adam. 134 00:07:45,345 --> 00:07:49,015 His mom had reached out asking if I wanted to come visit. 135 00:07:50,100 --> 00:07:52,268 Maybe it was time to check in. 136 00:07:54,646 --> 00:07:56,815 - Hey. - Hey, buddy. 137 00:07:57,148 --> 00:07:58,942 - Come here. - Okay. 138 00:08:00,026 --> 00:08:02,362 - Look at that there. - What is that? 139 00:08:02,445 --> 00:08:06,825 That's you and that's me at the birthday party. 140 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:09,786 - That's me? - Yeah, and that's you… Me. 141 00:08:10,704 --> 00:08:13,164 It was strange being in a real child's home 142 00:08:13,248 --> 00:08:16,042 after being in a fake one for so long. 143 00:08:16,459 --> 00:08:19,462 I wasn't used to this level of detail. 144 00:08:19,546 --> 00:08:23,842 Every object was perfectly placed but nothing was by design. 145 00:08:24,801 --> 00:08:28,304 It was a work of art. And it was just real life. 146 00:08:29,806 --> 00:08:30,849 Daddy. 147 00:08:31,391 --> 00:08:32,976 - Hey. - Daddy. 148 00:08:33,059 --> 00:08:35,895 - Yeah. - Look, I made this at school. 149 00:08:36,729 --> 00:08:38,815 And also, I cut my… 150 00:08:39,607 --> 00:08:40,984 - Hey, hey. - What? 151 00:08:41,067 --> 00:08:43,945 You don't have to call me daddy, you can call me Nathan, okay? 152 00:08:44,320 --> 00:08:46,698 No, don't be silly. 153 00:08:46,781 --> 00:08:51,119 No, because we're just playing daddy, remember? We're just pretending. 154 00:08:52,036 --> 00:08:55,874 I don't want you to be "Athan." I want you to be Daddy. 155 00:08:56,416 --> 00:09:01,379 Right, but we were just pretending, right? So, now we're back to Remy and Nathan. 156 00:09:03,339 --> 00:09:06,968 But also I don't want you to be… I don't want you to be Nathan. 157 00:09:07,635 --> 00:09:09,596 Well, that's my name. 158 00:09:19,022 --> 00:09:21,399 Has he been doing that? 159 00:09:22,192 --> 00:09:23,234 Yeah. 160 00:09:23,318 --> 00:09:25,737 I wondered about that when we first started. I was like… 161 00:09:26,237 --> 00:09:29,824 …that's probably like a really difficult role for a child 162 00:09:29,908 --> 00:09:32,202 who really doesn't have a dad 163 00:09:32,285 --> 00:09:35,622 and he's just like doesn't want it to not be real. 164 00:09:35,705 --> 00:09:37,665 So, it's actually really sad. 165 00:09:39,167 --> 00:09:40,418 He's such a cool kid. 166 00:09:40,919 --> 00:09:43,296 Sorry. I'm don't even know why I'm getting emotional I just… 167 00:09:43,379 --> 00:09:44,923 - No. - I love him to pieces. 168 00:09:45,006 --> 00:09:48,092 So, like, I hope this isn't affecting him. 169 00:09:51,596 --> 00:09:55,058 But it was really cool, and I know he loved it, and he had, like a lot of fun. 170 00:09:55,141 --> 00:09:56,184 Yeah, he was so… 171 00:09:56,267 --> 00:09:58,144 And it's not like I think anybody did anything wrong. 172 00:09:58,228 --> 00:10:00,563 It's just more like my mind wondering. 173 00:10:00,647 --> 00:10:02,899 Yeah. Does he know what acting is? 174 00:10:02,982 --> 00:10:05,401 Like, does he understand that a little bit, or… 175 00:10:05,485 --> 00:10:07,028 I don't know. 176 00:10:07,570 --> 00:10:10,406 I really don't, honestly. I'm not sure. 177 00:10:11,240 --> 00:10:13,409 Look what the bird give me. 178 00:10:13,826 --> 00:10:16,079 - The bird gave you that? - Yeah. 179 00:10:16,162 --> 00:10:17,372 What is that? 180 00:10:17,455 --> 00:10:19,666 Can you listen to this? This is very important, okay? 181 00:10:19,749 --> 00:10:21,334 - Why? - It's very important. 182 00:10:21,417 --> 00:10:24,212 So, remember how we are making a TV show? 183 00:10:25,797 --> 00:10:26,797 And… 184 00:10:28,299 --> 00:10:29,968 I'm Nathan, right? You know that? 185 00:10:30,051 --> 00:10:33,346 - I don't want you to be Nathan. - But honey, listen. 186 00:10:33,429 --> 00:10:35,598 Yeah, but daddy… When we were doing daddy, 187 00:10:35,682 --> 00:10:38,309 that was pretend because we were doing… 188 00:10:38,393 --> 00:10:39,978 - We were making a show. - We were playing. 189 00:10:40,061 --> 00:10:42,563 - And it was fun. - And acting. 190 00:10:42,647 --> 00:10:43,898 And acting, and… 191 00:10:44,273 --> 00:10:46,567 Do you remember when we were being dinosaurs? 192 00:10:47,193 --> 00:10:49,862 And chasing each other around as dinosaurs. 193 00:10:49,946 --> 00:10:52,031 - Yeah. - We weren't really dinosaurs, right? 194 00:10:52,115 --> 00:10:53,992 We were just playing and having fun, right? 195 00:10:54,075 --> 00:10:58,079 Yeah, I also wanna… I really be punching the dinosaur. 196 00:10:58,538 --> 00:11:04,669 Yeah, and that's kind of like when we were doing Daddy and Adam. 197 00:11:05,169 --> 00:11:07,422 That was just play like dinosaurs. 198 00:11:07,964 --> 00:11:10,675 But in real life, 199 00:11:10,758 --> 00:11:14,262 you're Remy and I'm Nathan, and we're just friends, right? 200 00:11:14,345 --> 00:11:16,305 - We're just friends. - Right? 201 00:11:16,389 --> 00:11:17,974 Does that make sense? 202 00:11:19,934 --> 00:11:22,520 And so… what do friends do? 203 00:11:24,355 --> 00:11:25,398 Nothing. 204 00:11:25,481 --> 00:11:27,775 No, friends hang out and have a fun time 205 00:11:28,109 --> 00:11:30,319 and then they go do their own life, 206 00:11:30,403 --> 00:11:33,948 and then they'll talk, and like, hang out sometimes and it's fun, right? 207 00:11:34,031 --> 00:11:39,537 So, it's… If you don't… No, you have to call me Nathan. 208 00:11:39,620 --> 00:11:40,663 Come here. I need to tell you. 209 00:11:40,747 --> 00:11:42,915 This is very important, Remy. Come on, listen to me. 210 00:11:42,999 --> 00:11:44,459 Listen to me. 211 00:11:44,542 --> 00:11:46,085 That is not your daddy. 212 00:11:46,169 --> 00:11:48,796 That's not your daddy. That's our friend Nathan. 213 00:11:49,172 --> 00:11:51,466 And you are Remy and you're not Adam. 214 00:11:51,841 --> 00:11:54,302 And we were just playing pretend. 215 00:11:55,094 --> 00:11:56,137 Okay? 216 00:11:56,762 --> 00:11:58,097 Yeah. 217 00:11:58,514 --> 00:11:59,891 Thank you. 218 00:12:03,895 --> 00:12:06,522 - What? - I wanna stay with… 219 00:12:07,190 --> 00:12:09,317 I just wanna stay with him. 220 00:12:11,152 --> 00:12:12,862 - Yeah. - But… 221 00:12:15,281 --> 00:12:19,410 - Bye, Nathan.? - Good, okay. 222 00:12:25,124 --> 00:12:28,044 - I still love Nathan. - I know. 223 00:12:29,212 --> 00:12:32,965 That's okay, you can still love him and he can be your friend. 224 00:12:58,032 --> 00:13:00,117 So, did you see that guy Max again? 225 00:13:01,953 --> 00:13:03,079 How'd that go? 226 00:13:03,788 --> 00:13:05,581 - Amazing. - Yeah? 227 00:13:06,624 --> 00:13:09,377 They invited me to something, I said no. 228 00:13:09,710 --> 00:13:11,754 So, they just walked away. 229 00:13:12,672 --> 00:13:13,965 Great. 230 00:13:14,423 --> 00:13:17,301 - Guess your advice did work. - Good. 231 00:13:25,393 --> 00:13:27,645 You know I'm not your real dad, right? 232 00:13:28,020 --> 00:13:29,313 Wait, what? 233 00:13:30,106 --> 00:13:33,859 Like… you know, I'm not actually your dad. 234 00:13:34,777 --> 00:13:36,404 - Yeah. - Okay. 235 00:13:38,114 --> 00:13:39,991 - Like we're just acting. - Yeah. 236 00:13:40,074 --> 00:13:42,076 - You know that right? - Yeah, yeah. 237 00:13:42,451 --> 00:13:44,120 And you understand what that means? 238 00:13:44,203 --> 00:13:45,705 - Yes. - Okay. 239 00:13:47,289 --> 00:13:48,499 Do you have a dad? 240 00:13:48,874 --> 00:13:50,418 - Yes. - Okay. 241 00:13:51,585 --> 00:13:55,589 - Sorry. I didn't mean to… insult you. - No, I don't… It's fine. 242 00:13:55,673 --> 00:13:57,842 You're just… you're a good actor. 243 00:13:57,925 --> 00:14:02,138 So you can't tell, I just wanted to be sure. 244 00:14:02,722 --> 00:14:03,931 Okay. 245 00:14:05,641 --> 00:14:09,854 Do you feel like, I'm like, believable as a dad, like… 246 00:14:12,440 --> 00:14:14,483 You're a great scene partner. 247 00:14:16,527 --> 00:14:18,487 - Good. - Yeah. 248 00:14:26,746 --> 00:14:28,748 What on earth was I doing? 249 00:14:30,624 --> 00:14:34,712 Everything about this rehearsal just felt so trivial now. 250 00:14:35,963 --> 00:14:38,883 Maybe the best use of my resources at this point 251 00:14:38,966 --> 00:14:42,762 would be to figure out what I could have done differently. 252 00:14:44,054 --> 00:14:46,682 - What did you say? - I love you, daddy. 253 00:14:47,183 --> 00:14:48,684 I love you too, Adam. 254 00:14:49,351 --> 00:14:52,855 To live these moments again. And seen if there was a better path. 255 00:14:53,397 --> 00:14:55,858 I'm Doctor Fart, come have a seat. 256 00:14:56,525 --> 00:14:58,194 Kinda hear how he talks. 257 00:14:58,277 --> 00:15:01,322 After all, how can you move on from a mistake 258 00:15:01,405 --> 00:15:03,991 if you don't even know what you could have done to avoid it. 259 00:15:05,034 --> 00:15:07,620 - What did you say? - I love you, Daddy. 260 00:15:10,539 --> 00:15:14,919 Refer to me as Nathan, please. Is that okay? 261 00:15:15,002 --> 00:15:16,086 Yeah, okay. 262 00:15:16,170 --> 00:15:19,298 I tried experimenting with a slightly colder demeanor. 263 00:15:19,381 --> 00:15:22,384 Okay. You don't need to hold my hand you're a big boy now. Okay? 264 00:15:22,468 --> 00:15:25,304 To see if it could have helped prevent a bond being formed. 265 00:15:25,387 --> 00:15:27,306 Okay, let's not just… just let's play the game. 266 00:15:27,389 --> 00:15:28,849 We can still have fun. We don't need to hug. 267 00:15:28,933 --> 00:15:31,852 Daddy, can you read me a bedtime story? 268 00:15:33,437 --> 00:15:34,897 Aren't you… 269 00:15:35,856 --> 00:15:38,692 Aren't you old enough to read by yourself? 270 00:15:39,276 --> 00:15:40,736 But all this forced detachment 271 00:15:40,819 --> 00:15:44,448 felt like it was defeating the purpose of rehearsing being a parent. 272 00:15:44,532 --> 00:15:46,200 All right, maybe a quick one. 273 00:15:46,909 --> 00:15:49,203 Perhaps I could have avoided these issues, 274 00:15:49,286 --> 00:15:52,248 if I used older kids to play the younger ones. 275 00:15:53,249 --> 00:15:56,043 I love you, Daddy. 276 00:15:58,045 --> 00:16:01,423 - What did you say? - I said I love you, Daddy. 277 00:16:01,757 --> 00:16:03,467 I love you too, Adam. 278 00:16:03,550 --> 00:16:06,762 Then I could have been just as affectionate and caring towards them 279 00:16:06,845 --> 00:16:08,347 and they would never get confused. 280 00:16:10,182 --> 00:16:11,225 No! 281 00:16:11,308 --> 00:16:12,518 If their performance was good enough, 282 00:16:12,601 --> 00:16:15,521 maybe I could have looked past any visual inconsistencies 283 00:16:16,355 --> 00:16:17,398 Yeah! 284 00:16:17,481 --> 00:16:20,734 It's not hard to be in the moment with a great actor. 285 00:16:24,613 --> 00:16:26,240 But even though I gave it my best, 286 00:16:26,615 --> 00:16:29,076 something about this just didn't sit right. 287 00:16:29,159 --> 00:16:30,953 - Goodnight, Adam. - Goodnight, Daddy. 288 00:16:31,453 --> 00:16:33,622 And I found myself constantly distracted 289 00:16:33,706 --> 00:16:37,251 by the thought that I was living with a fully grown man. 290 00:16:38,127 --> 00:16:40,504 And removing humans from the equation entirely 291 00:16:40,838 --> 00:16:42,798 proved to be just as weird. 292 00:16:44,842 --> 00:16:46,927 I love you too, Adam. 293 00:16:47,511 --> 00:16:50,514 Well, if there was nothing I could have done differently with the kids, 294 00:16:50,597 --> 00:16:53,100 maybe I could have changed my approach with the parents. 295 00:16:53,183 --> 00:16:54,226 - Amber. - Amber. 296 00:16:54,309 --> 00:16:55,728 Good to meet you. Okay, come on in. 297 00:16:55,811 --> 00:16:57,229 - Nice to meet you. - Yeah. 298 00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:02,901 What could I have said? 299 00:17:03,527 --> 00:17:05,529 Maybe… 300 00:17:10,117 --> 00:17:13,662 Or should I have done something different on that day we said goodbye. 301 00:17:13,996 --> 00:17:15,122 It's okay. 302 00:17:15,622 --> 00:17:16,915 What? 303 00:17:18,375 --> 00:17:20,544 What can I do? What do you want? 304 00:17:21,628 --> 00:17:23,005 I don't wanna leave. 305 00:17:24,339 --> 00:17:26,717 We can say goodbye. 306 00:17:27,384 --> 00:17:29,011 You wanna give him a hug? 307 00:17:30,679 --> 00:17:31,847 Hey. 308 00:17:32,306 --> 00:17:33,474 So, maybe it was Angela. 309 00:17:33,891 --> 00:17:37,394 That was so much fun, right? 310 00:17:37,770 --> 00:17:39,188 If she had never left, 311 00:17:39,271 --> 00:17:41,023 maybe that would have made all the difference. 312 00:17:41,106 --> 00:17:43,317 You have to be good and listen to your mom, okay? 313 00:17:43,400 --> 00:17:45,194 She was so good with the kids. 314 00:17:45,736 --> 00:17:48,197 Okay. Thank you. 315 00:17:48,280 --> 00:17:49,323 Bye. 316 00:17:49,406 --> 00:17:51,784 And with a fake mom in the house the whole time, 317 00:17:51,867 --> 00:17:53,994 maybe he would have known it was all pretend. 318 00:17:54,077 --> 00:17:55,245 You see. 319 00:17:57,539 --> 00:18:00,334 But what could I have done differently to make her stay? 320 00:18:06,256 --> 00:18:07,299 I… 321 00:18:10,844 --> 00:18:13,430 I can make it better. I can… 322 00:18:13,514 --> 00:18:15,724 Things can improve. I can improve. 323 00:18:16,767 --> 00:18:22,105 I just feel like, we're just going back in circles and that's never gonna change. 324 00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:25,192 I'll just take my tea. 325 00:18:27,694 --> 00:18:29,112 But what could I have said? 326 00:18:30,322 --> 00:18:31,740 What could I have done? 327 00:18:31,824 --> 00:18:33,283 No, don't go. 328 00:18:34,284 --> 00:18:36,036 That's all you have to say? 329 00:18:37,454 --> 00:18:38,497 Yeah. 330 00:18:39,331 --> 00:18:40,624 Okay. 331 00:18:41,792 --> 00:18:44,044 Well then, I'll just take my tea. 332 00:18:44,795 --> 00:18:46,380 Why do I always end up here? 333 00:18:46,838 --> 00:18:49,883 I can change. I can try to… 334 00:18:49,967 --> 00:18:52,386 I can't change 180 but… 335 00:18:52,469 --> 00:18:54,429 I can change in small ways, for sure. 336 00:18:56,640 --> 00:18:59,434 Well then, I think you've made your choice. 337 00:19:01,562 --> 00:19:02,854 I'll get my tea. 338 00:19:04,731 --> 00:19:08,986 - I'm sorry, I am who I am. - And I am who I am. 339 00:19:10,612 --> 00:19:11,780 Right. 340 00:19:12,364 --> 00:19:13,907 I'll just get my tea. 341 00:19:15,367 --> 00:19:18,161 How doesn this keep happening to me? 342 00:19:18,245 --> 00:19:21,373 What else can you do when you're trying your best? 343 00:19:21,456 --> 00:19:23,417 - Okay. - Well… 344 00:19:23,875 --> 00:19:25,502 I'll just take my tea. 345 00:19:44,146 --> 00:19:47,566 I just wanted to apologize for suggesting that… 346 00:19:48,984 --> 00:19:51,361 you aren't taking this seriously. 347 00:19:51,820 --> 00:19:56,074 You were navigating it as best as you could and… 348 00:19:57,659 --> 00:19:59,077 So, I'm sorry. 349 00:19:59,745 --> 00:20:02,164 I was the problem, not you. 350 00:20:03,915 --> 00:20:05,959 I appreciate you saying that. 351 00:20:06,710 --> 00:20:08,420 All is forgiven. 352 00:20:09,713 --> 00:20:11,256 Really? Just like that? 353 00:20:11,882 --> 00:20:16,678 There's a scripture that talks about forgiving someone seven times. 354 00:20:17,095 --> 00:20:20,098 But Jesus says the new teaching is, I tell you… 355 00:20:20,432 --> 00:20:22,768 seven… 70 times seven. 356 00:20:23,101 --> 00:20:26,897 Is that 77 times seven. 357 00:20:26,980 --> 00:20:28,523 And then Peter came up to him and said, 358 00:20:28,607 --> 00:20:32,110 "Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him?" 359 00:20:32,194 --> 00:20:33,987 "As many as seven times." 360 00:20:34,071 --> 00:20:38,700 And then Jesus said, "I do not say to you seven times, but 70 times seven." 361 00:20:39,242 --> 00:20:42,704 So, it's like if we have to forgive our neighbor that much, 362 00:20:43,246 --> 00:20:46,083 and we have to love ourselves like we love our neighbor, 363 00:20:46,166 --> 00:20:49,336 then we also have to forgive ourselves that much. 364 00:20:52,798 --> 00:20:53,840 All right. 365 00:20:59,763 --> 00:21:01,431 - Hey. - Hi, guys. 366 00:21:01,515 --> 00:21:03,767 Hi, Remy. Do you remember Liam? 367 00:21:03,850 --> 00:21:05,644 - Yeah. - He's an actor, too. 368 00:21:05,727 --> 00:21:09,272 He played Adam also. He was at the birthday party, you switched with him. 369 00:21:09,981 --> 00:21:11,775 - You remember him? - Yeah. 370 00:21:11,858 --> 00:21:13,860 Three, two, one go. 371 00:21:14,528 --> 00:21:16,363 No, no! 372 00:21:16,905 --> 00:21:20,200 Forgiving yourself sounds so easy and nice. 373 00:21:20,283 --> 00:21:21,618 Watch out. 374 00:21:22,285 --> 00:21:25,163 But how does a person actually do that? 375 00:21:26,790 --> 00:21:29,084 - He called me Nathan when I came in. - Yeah. Totally. 376 00:21:29,167 --> 00:21:30,710 So, what do you think? 377 00:21:30,794 --> 00:21:35,257 I think he's… accepted it and he's kind of like, chill with it. 378 00:21:35,674 --> 00:21:39,094 - He doesn't think I'm his… - Yeah, he gets it for sure. 379 00:21:39,177 --> 00:21:40,846 - You think so? - Yeah. 380 00:21:43,723 --> 00:21:48,645 I think that he will be okay. I do. I think he'll be okay. 381 00:21:49,729 --> 00:21:51,648 How do you convince yourself of that? 382 00:21:52,023 --> 00:21:53,066 I didn't convince myself. 383 00:21:53,149 --> 00:21:56,278 I'm just gonna make sure he's okay, so he is and I just know. 384 00:21:57,070 --> 00:21:59,739 Like I just know. Like, I don't know how to explain it. 385 00:21:59,823 --> 00:22:03,827 It's something you won't know until you like have a kid if you do. 386 00:22:04,202 --> 00:22:07,414 What did you see in his face that makes you so sure? 387 00:22:08,665 --> 00:22:10,083 Myself. 388 00:22:11,543 --> 00:22:14,254 It's just one of those things, I don't know, you just know. 389 00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:17,257 No! 390 00:22:17,924 --> 00:22:19,342 You strong, boy. 391 00:22:20,093 --> 00:22:25,015 Could it ben that the path to forgiveness lies in someone else's eyes? 392 00:22:25,098 --> 00:22:27,350 Where'd you get that sweatshirt? 393 00:22:28,184 --> 00:22:30,645 Buckle. Yeah. 394 00:22:31,146 --> 00:22:32,939 - It's nice. - Thank you. 395 00:22:34,274 --> 00:22:35,442 Yep. 396 00:22:35,525 --> 00:22:37,152 What's your name again? 397 00:22:38,111 --> 00:22:39,154 Nathan. 398 00:22:40,030 --> 00:22:41,489 - Nathan. - Yeah. 399 00:22:41,573 --> 00:22:43,033 He is crazy. 400 00:22:43,867 --> 00:22:46,077 I just want to call you daddy. 401 00:22:46,411 --> 00:22:49,122 - We're not going back to that. - No, no, Nathan. 402 00:22:49,205 --> 00:22:50,957 That doesn't worry you? What just happened. 403 00:22:51,041 --> 00:22:53,543 No. No. 404 00:22:55,837 --> 00:22:57,422 Bye! 405 00:22:58,798 --> 00:23:00,800 Bye. See you later. 406 00:23:01,217 --> 00:23:03,845 - My TV friends are leaving. - Yes, they are. 407 00:23:04,637 --> 00:23:07,807 You may never be able to change what happened. 408 00:23:09,559 --> 00:23:14,564 But maybe with a new perspective, you could try to change yourself. 409 00:23:15,106 --> 00:23:17,317 - Did you get enough? - Yeah, I think so. 410 00:23:17,400 --> 00:23:19,235 Okay, good. Buckle up. 411 00:23:43,051 --> 00:23:44,344 Remy? 412 00:23:46,012 --> 00:23:47,097 eah, Mom. 413 00:23:47,180 --> 00:23:49,140 you wanna record that TV show audition now, baba? 414 00:23:49,808 --> 00:23:51,392 - What do you think? - Yeah. 415 00:23:51,476 --> 00:23:53,061 Yeah? Okay. Come on. 416 00:23:53,770 --> 00:23:58,233 Hi. I'm Remy. I live in Oregon. 417 00:23:58,942 --> 00:24:02,278 And I have so many toys that are in my room. 418 00:24:02,362 --> 00:24:03,988 Like, one, I have a… 419 00:24:04,072 --> 00:24:07,992 I have a Gru plushie. I really like to sleep with him… 420 00:24:21,422 --> 00:24:23,967 That's our house there. We're gonna be right there, huh? 421 00:24:25,051 --> 00:24:26,177 Cool, huh? 422 00:24:27,387 --> 00:24:29,138 - Hey, Amber. - Hi. 423 00:24:29,222 --> 00:24:31,975 - And you must be Remy. - Yes. 424 00:24:32,058 --> 00:24:34,477 We're so excited to have you guys be a part of this. 425 00:24:34,561 --> 00:24:38,523 Let me introduce you the director, right? It's a very unique project. 426 00:24:38,606 --> 00:24:39,774 - Okay. - Come inside. 427 00:24:40,108 --> 00:24:42,777 Do you guys have Hungry Hungry Hippos? 428 00:24:42,861 --> 00:24:43,945 We sure do. 429 00:24:44,696 --> 00:24:48,867 All right, so… Sort of freeform. We won't be sticking to a script. 430 00:24:48,950 --> 00:24:49,993 Okay. 431 00:24:50,076 --> 00:24:52,495 But of course, anything that happens inside the home 432 00:24:52,829 --> 00:24:54,747 will be sure to clear with you beforehand. 433 00:24:54,831 --> 00:24:55,915 Okay, great. 434 00:24:56,332 --> 00:24:59,210 - Do you want me anywhere… - Well… 435 00:25:00,336 --> 00:25:03,131 Yeah, you're free to watch everything here at the monitors. 436 00:25:03,214 --> 00:25:04,507 - Thanks. - Okay. Yeah. 437 00:25:04,591 --> 00:25:07,176 - Let me… I have to go. - Yeah, I'll see you. 438 00:25:14,601 --> 00:25:18,062 - So, how are you today, Adam? - Good. I'm good. 439 00:25:18,688 --> 00:25:22,275 Okay. What have you been doing? Just tidying up your room? 440 00:25:22,358 --> 00:25:23,526 He's kind of a weird dude, huh? 441 00:25:29,616 --> 00:25:32,160 Can I get you some soda or sparkling water? 442 00:25:32,869 --> 00:25:34,287 - Oh, I'm okay. - You sure? 443 00:25:34,370 --> 00:25:35,622 - Thank you. Yeah, thank you. - Okay. 444 00:25:36,080 --> 00:25:37,373 Right. Well, let me know if you need anything. 445 00:25:37,457 --> 00:25:39,375 Sure, thank you so much. 446 00:25:44,130 --> 00:25:45,673 Do I get to see Daddy tomorrow? 447 00:25:45,757 --> 00:25:48,926 - You do. Does that sound good? - Yeah. 448 00:25:49,427 --> 00:25:51,429 You know he's your pretend daddy though, right? 449 00:25:52,639 --> 00:25:55,516 No, not… Don't, baba. Not on your nose. No, no, no. 450 00:25:55,600 --> 00:25:57,226 This is gonna hurt you. 451 00:25:57,310 --> 00:25:59,896 Okay, you want some food? Are you hungry? 452 00:26:16,162 --> 00:26:18,873 - How was work today? - Good. Just busy. 453 00:26:22,210 --> 00:26:25,963 While you were at work today, he kept asking to see his dad. 454 00:26:27,507 --> 00:26:29,967 - Do you know what's that about? - That's the TV show he's been doing. 455 00:26:30,051 --> 00:26:32,929 - I told you about that, Mom. - Oh, right. 456 00:26:35,348 --> 00:26:38,935 Do you think he's a little young to be getting into acting? 457 00:26:39,894 --> 00:26:42,522 No, he's having a lot of fun. 458 00:26:43,439 --> 00:26:45,900 I just worry about him sometimes. 459 00:26:50,279 --> 00:26:53,866 I love you, Daddy. 460 00:26:54,492 --> 00:26:56,869 - What did you say? - I love you, Daddy. 461 00:26:56,953 --> 00:26:59,038 I love you too, Adam. 462 00:27:00,123 --> 00:27:02,083 And what's… 463 00:27:06,462 --> 00:27:08,923 They said you're gonna have a birthday party soon. 464 00:27:09,006 --> 00:27:11,217 Is my daddy gonna be there? 465 00:27:11,551 --> 00:27:13,386 Yeah, he's your pretend daddy, baba. 466 00:27:13,469 --> 00:27:14,637 - Okay. - Okay. 467 00:27:14,720 --> 00:27:17,390 My pretend daddy loves me. 468 00:27:19,725 --> 00:27:22,145 - Come on in. Let's go. - Okay. 469 00:27:22,603 --> 00:27:25,815 - What's wrong? You sad? - You want a hug? 470 00:27:25,898 --> 00:27:27,066 You want to give him a hug? 471 00:27:27,150 --> 00:27:29,443 - No. - I could… we'll see you. 472 00:27:30,153 --> 00:27:32,321 We gotta go, okay? We can't stay here. 473 00:27:32,738 --> 00:27:35,241 - It's okay. - I don't wanna leave. I don't… 474 00:27:35,324 --> 00:27:38,161 You know Mommy has to go. You give him a hug. Say goodbye. 475 00:27:38,244 --> 00:27:39,287 No. 476 00:27:39,370 --> 00:27:40,913 It's just complicated 477 00:27:40,997 --> 00:27:44,584 because he's now seeing kids at school and they have their dads 478 00:27:44,667 --> 00:27:47,378 and he's kind of wondering where's his. 479 00:27:48,421 --> 00:27:50,590 You know. And so… 480 00:27:51,966 --> 00:27:54,218 it's just new to him. New concept. 481 00:27:55,970 --> 00:27:57,179 I get it. 482 00:27:57,930 --> 00:27:59,140 I hope it's okay. 483 00:27:59,515 --> 00:28:01,809 Yeah. Are you okay? 484 00:28:03,144 --> 00:28:05,229 Yeah, yeah. I'm okay. 485 00:28:08,900 --> 00:28:09,984 Okay. 486 00:28:11,027 --> 00:28:12,778 But I don't want you to be Nathan. 487 00:28:12,862 --> 00:28:14,989 - I want you to be daddy. - Right. 488 00:28:15,406 --> 00:28:18,117 But we are just pretending, right? 489 00:28:19,160 --> 00:28:23,789 And now, we're back to Remy and Nathan, okay? 490 00:28:24,540 --> 00:28:27,668 I don't want… I don't want you to be… 491 00:28:32,340 --> 00:28:34,133 I want him to be daddy. 492 00:28:36,344 --> 00:28:38,429 It's okay. It's okay. 493 00:28:39,347 --> 00:28:41,682 He said he wasn't my daddy anymore. 494 00:28:42,308 --> 00:28:45,811 I'm sorry, baba. That must've been very hard for you to hear. 495 00:28:45,895 --> 00:28:48,397 Why did he say he was my daddy? 496 00:28:48,481 --> 00:28:52,652 I know. That man didn't mean to confuse you, honey. 497 00:28:52,735 --> 00:28:55,071 He just didn't know what he was doing. 498 00:28:55,780 --> 00:28:59,033 You know, he… He's not that different from you. 499 00:29:00,201 --> 00:29:04,080 He's just figuring stuff out and messing up along the way. 500 00:29:06,666 --> 00:29:08,876 Maybe we shouldn't have done that show, huh? 501 00:29:09,335 --> 00:29:11,837 It's like a weird little weird thing for a little kid to be a part of. 502 00:29:12,755 --> 00:29:15,758 But you know what? Mommy's not perfect, okay? 503 00:29:16,467 --> 00:29:20,638 She makes mistakes too. And you're gonna make mistakes. 504 00:29:23,057 --> 00:29:24,892 Look at me, baba. You know what. 505 00:29:25,768 --> 00:29:28,521 I think it's a good thing that you're sad. 506 00:29:28,604 --> 00:29:31,023 Because it shows that you have a heart. 507 00:29:31,107 --> 00:29:34,318 It shows that you can feel and you can love, 508 00:29:34,902 --> 00:29:37,154 and you can put your trust in others. 509 00:29:42,368 --> 00:29:43,786 Is that a smile I see? 510 00:29:44,245 --> 00:29:47,039 Is that another thing you're feeling there? A smile. 511 00:29:47,623 --> 00:29:50,501 How do you feel if tickle monster attacks you? 512 00:29:51,710 --> 00:29:53,129 See, 513 00:29:53,212 --> 00:29:55,047 life's better was surprises. 514 00:29:55,131 --> 00:29:59,635 I mean, some things you want to be prepared for, but you know what I mean. 515 00:30:00,761 --> 00:30:03,431 Oh, no, you got me! Tickle monster got me now. 516 00:30:03,514 --> 00:30:05,182 What the heck? 517 00:30:05,724 --> 00:30:06,976 That's weird. 518 00:30:07,309 --> 00:30:10,271 But you know what? It's okay if you get confused. 519 00:30:10,354 --> 00:30:15,443 It's okay if you get sad because no matter what you experience, 520 00:30:15,943 --> 00:30:17,570 we have each other. 521 00:30:18,279 --> 00:30:21,615 And I'm always gonna be here for you, okay? 522 00:30:21,699 --> 00:30:23,117 'Cause I'm your dad. 523 00:30:24,910 --> 00:30:27,705 Wait, I thought you were my mom. 524 00:30:40,301 --> 00:30:41,594 No. 525 00:30:44,638 --> 00:30:46,015 I'm your dad. 526 00:31:05,117 --> 00:31:07,036 Good boy. You wanna go play now? 527 00:31:07,119 --> 00:31:09,496 - Yeah, let's go. - Okay, let's go play. 528 00:31:11,665 --> 00:31:13,000 Let's go.