1 00:00:01,835 --> 00:00:04,236 Anyway, that's how I escaped from space prison! 2 00:00:04,271 --> 00:00:05,504 Oh, scary place. 3 00:00:05,539 --> 00:00:08,073 Wow, Rick! That's... That's one... one heck of a story. 4 00:00:08,108 --> 00:00:10,253 I sure do wish I could have been there to see it happen. Oh, come on. 5 00:00:10,277 --> 00:00:13,178 Who wants to watch a mad scientist use handmade sci-fi tools 6 00:00:13,213 --> 00:00:15,147 to take out highly trained alien guards 7 00:00:15,182 --> 00:00:17,182 when we can sit here and be a family at Shoney's? 8 00:00:17,217 --> 00:00:20,085 Dad, it's great to have you back, no matter where we are, 9 00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:21,786 but wouldn't you like to go home? 10 00:00:21,821 --> 00:00:23,989 Emotionally speaking, honey, Shoney's is my home. 11 00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:25,368 Yeah, but you just got out of prison. 12 00:00:25,392 --> 00:00:27,859 I mean, how much of a step up from that is... 13 00:00:27,894 --> 00:00:29,639 Jerry, get out of the booth, take all your clothes off, 14 00:00:29,663 --> 00:00:30,829 and fold yourself 12 times. 15 00:00:30,864 --> 00:00:32,297 You got it. 16 00:00:37,571 --> 00:00:39,004 Six folds, huh? 17 00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:40,883 W-W-What, have you guys got me in a Series 9000? 18 00:00:40,907 --> 00:00:43,942 You cheap insect fucks didn't think I was worth your best equipment? 19 00:00:43,977 --> 00:00:46,811 Man, I told the money bugs. 20 00:00:46,846 --> 00:00:48,880 I said, "You know who this guy is, right?" 21 00:00:48,915 --> 00:00:50,949 You want me to get intel out of the smartest mammal 22 00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:53,785 "in the galaxy, you better give me a decent brainalyzer." 23 00:00:53,820 --> 00:00:55,464 Well, you might as well order some pancakes, 24 00:00:55,488 --> 00:00:57,700 because I don't see the need to leave this part of my brain. 25 00:00:57,724 --> 00:00:59,157 Oh, I think you do. 26 00:00:59,192 --> 00:01:01,370 Eventually, you're either gonna relax your cerebellum... 27 00:01:01,394 --> 00:01:04,329 Shoney's. - ... or the Series 9000 is going to turn it into mush. 28 00:01:04,364 --> 00:01:06,665 Relaxed enough? 29 00:01:06,700 --> 00:01:07,866 I admire you, Rick. 30 00:01:09,102 --> 00:01:10,368 When I... 31 00:01:11,605 --> 00:01:12,804 Rick, here's... 32 00:01:15,375 --> 00:01:16,675 What's going on? 33 00:01:16,710 --> 00:01:18,854 It's hard to tell. He may have manifested some sort of butt. 34 00:01:18,878 --> 00:01:20,078 He can do that? 35 00:01:20,113 --> 00:01:23,215 He is the smartest man in the universe. 36 00:01:59,719 --> 00:02:02,354 I tell ya, the Galactic Federation taking over Earth... 37 00:02:02,389 --> 00:02:04,356 Best thing that's ever happened to this family. 38 00:02:04,391 --> 00:02:06,224 I just got my sixth promotion this week, 39 00:02:06,259 --> 00:02:07,536 and I still don't know what I do. 40 00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:09,194 Who cares how high they promote you? 41 00:02:09,229 --> 00:02:10,929 Everyone just gets paid in pills. 42 00:02:10,964 --> 00:02:12,942 Well, when you're not sure what you do for a living, 43 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:14,199 you can make your own rules. 44 00:02:14,234 --> 00:02:16,368 Summer, show your father some respect. 45 00:02:16,403 --> 00:02:18,770 He's pulling down - a six-chewable figure income. 46 00:02:20,273 --> 00:02:22,051 I'll get that in a moment. How are everyone's pills? 47 00:02:22,075 --> 00:02:24,042 Oh, Morty, you've hardly touched your pills. 48 00:02:24,077 --> 00:02:26,044 I kind of had big pills for lunch, and I 49 00:02:26,079 --> 00:02:28,213 wasn't gonna eat any more pills. 50 00:02:29,449 --> 00:02:30,649 Thank you, Conroy. 51 00:02:30,684 --> 00:02:31,950 You spoil us, Conroy. 52 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,718 Grandpa Rick wouldn't put up with this! 53 00:02:33,753 --> 00:02:36,421 Stop saying his name! He abandoned us. 54 00:02:36,456 --> 00:02:37,722 Willem Dafoe! 55 00:02:37,757 --> 00:02:39,958 Th-That's the guy I couldn't think of this morning. 56 00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:41,259 Don't make my mistake, Summer. 57 00:02:41,294 --> 00:02:43,228 Don't deify the people that leave you. 58 00:02:43,263 --> 00:02:46,564 You'll end up a horse surgeon in a world controlled by aliens 59 00:02:46,599 --> 00:02:48,266 whose medicine keeps horses 60 00:02:48,301 --> 00:02:50,068 healthy forever. 61 00:02:50,103 --> 00:02:51,970 Horses live longer than tortoises now. 62 00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:53,405 Is that what you want for yourself? 63 00:02:53,440 --> 00:02:56,675 Maybe I just want you to care if I run away yelling! 64 00:02:56,710 --> 00:02:58,009 Who saved room for pill brûlée? 65 00:02:58,044 --> 00:02:59,577 Ooh! 66 00:02:59,612 --> 00:03:02,080 I can see why you chose this family-friendly restaurant 67 00:03:02,115 --> 00:03:03,748 to represent your cerebellum. 68 00:03:03,783 --> 00:03:06,751 So safe, so comfortable, so Shoney's. 69 00:03:06,786 --> 00:03:10,088 But admit it, Rick... you're going crazy cooped up in here. 70 00:03:10,123 --> 00:03:11,589 Let's go visit some memories. 71 00:03:11,624 --> 00:03:12,757 Oh, any particular ones? 72 00:03:12,792 --> 00:03:14,292 You want to see my first boner, 73 00:03:14,327 --> 00:03:15,438 or should we go straight to the moment 74 00:03:15,462 --> 00:03:17,429 I discovered interdimensional travel? 75 00:03:17,464 --> 00:03:19,764 Ooh, your little flappy doodles are twitching. 76 00:03:19,799 --> 00:03:22,111 Does that mean you're aroused, or did you just get a signal 77 00:03:22,135 --> 00:03:23,612 that one of your buddies found a grape? 78 00:03:23,636 --> 00:03:24,936 It's arousal. 79 00:03:24,971 --> 00:03:26,805 Yes, I'd like very much to visit the memory 80 00:03:26,840 --> 00:03:28,117 of you inventing your portal gun. 81 00:03:28,141 --> 00:03:30,775 Yeah, well, tough titties. 82 00:03:30,810 --> 00:03:33,445 There's no tougher titty than a psychotic break, Rick. 83 00:03:33,480 --> 00:03:37,549 Well, that depends on who breaks first... me or the titty. 84 00:03:39,386 --> 00:03:40,952 Someone special you remember? 85 00:03:40,987 --> 00:03:42,887 Is that your memory of her out there... 86 00:03:42,922 --> 00:03:44,356 Between where you were on 9/11 87 00:03:44,391 --> 00:03:46,124 and your favorite sports blooper? 88 00:03:48,328 --> 00:03:52,030 If we stay here, you'll die, along with all your memories. 89 00:03:52,065 --> 00:03:53,998 If you take me where I want to go... 90 00:03:54,033 --> 00:03:55,633 she'll be there, too, won't she? 91 00:03:55,668 --> 00:03:58,903 The day I invented the portal gun is the day I lost her. 92 00:03:58,938 --> 00:04:00,305 Oh, that sounds cool. 93 00:04:00,340 --> 00:04:02,240 I can get what I want and you can say goodbye. 94 00:04:02,275 --> 00:04:05,210 Fine, but I'm driving. 95 00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,245 As an excuse to strip away our freedom. 96 00:04:10,183 --> 00:04:12,083 Huh? What are you... What are you doing? 97 00:04:12,118 --> 00:04:14,652 Grandpa Rick must have some secret lab, right? 98 00:04:14,687 --> 00:04:17,489 With, like, laser guns and jets packs and a space tank! 99 00:04:17,524 --> 00:04:19,057 And we can go break him out of prison! 100 00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:20,392 Look at these dead flies! 101 00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:22,004 Maybe if we arrange them in a certain order, 102 00:04:22,028 --> 00:04:23,828 it plays a hologram or it opens a secret door. 103 00:04:23,863 --> 00:04:25,363 Summer, you're freaking me out. 104 00:04:25,398 --> 00:04:27,510 I know things have changed a lot, and I know you miss Rick, 105 00:04:27,534 --> 00:04:29,501 but getting him back wouldn't make things better. 106 00:04:29,536 --> 00:04:31,069 And, you know, we're not doing so bad. 107 00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:32,604 We're miserable, Morty! 108 00:04:32,639 --> 00:04:36,007 There's a mandatory curfew, their weird calendar made me 47, 109 00:04:36,042 --> 00:04:37,675 and they weaponized the Eiffel Tower! 110 00:04:37,710 --> 00:04:40,512 Hey, I like being 35. I-I can rent a car now. 111 00:04:40,547 --> 00:04:41,613 Because you suck. 112 00:04:41,648 --> 00:04:43,192 You've been keeping your lip zipped about it 113 00:04:43,216 --> 00:04:45,049 since Grandpa got arrested, but the fact is, 114 00:04:45,084 --> 00:04:46,918 you're freaking stoked to bail on him. 115 00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:48,353 He bails on everybody! 116 00:04:48,388 --> 00:04:50,188 He bailed on Mom when she was a kid! 117 00:04:50,223 --> 00:04:51,723 He... He bailed on tiny planet! 118 00:04:51,758 --> 00:04:53,569 And in case I never made this clear to you, Summer, 119 00:04:53,593 --> 00:04:54,759 he bailed on you. 120 00:04:54,794 --> 00:04:56,628 He left you to rot in a world that he ruined 121 00:04:56,663 --> 00:04:57,896 because he doesn't care! 122 00:04:57,931 --> 00:04:59,597 Because nobody's special to him, Summer, 123 00:04:59,632 --> 00:05:00,999 not even himself. 124 00:05:01,034 --> 00:05:03,045 So, if you really want your grandpa back, grab a shovel. 125 00:05:03,069 --> 00:05:05,870 The one that won't let you down is buried in your backyard! 126 00:05:05,905 --> 00:05:07,038 You're right! 127 00:05:07,073 --> 00:05:08,573 What? No, I'm not right. 128 00:05:08,608 --> 00:05:10,875 I-I was using ghoulish overkill! 129 00:05:10,910 --> 00:05:12,143 Ghoulish overkill, Summer! 130 00:05:15,648 --> 00:05:18,049 Oh, God! Oh, God! 131 00:05:18,084 --> 00:05:19,084 Whoa, whoa! 132 00:05:21,921 --> 00:05:23,154 Where are we going? 133 00:05:23,189 --> 00:05:25,056 To the day it all began... and ended. 134 00:05:25,091 --> 00:05:27,325 The moment that changed everything. 135 00:05:28,528 --> 00:05:30,495 Welcome to McDonald's. Can I take your order? 136 00:05:30,530 --> 00:05:32,230 Yeah, I'd like to get a 10-piece McNugget 137 00:05:32,265 --> 00:05:34,098 and a bunch of the Szechuan sauce. 138 00:05:34,133 --> 00:05:35,744 Like, as much as you're allowed to give me. 139 00:05:35,768 --> 00:05:38,803 In 1998, they had this promotion for the Disney film "Mulan," 140 00:05:38,838 --> 00:05:40,104 where they... Where they... 141 00:05:40,139 --> 00:05:41,779 They created a new sauce for the McNuggets 142 00:05:41,808 --> 00:05:44,342 called Szechuan sauce, and it's delicious! 143 00:05:44,377 --> 00:05:46,411 And then they got rid of it, and now it's gone. 144 00:05:46,446 --> 00:05:48,290 This is the only place we're gonna be able to try it, is in my memory. 145 00:05:48,314 --> 00:05:50,259 Rick, you're doing this bit while your brain is melting. 146 00:05:50,283 --> 00:05:52,117 Okay. All right, all right. 147 00:05:55,121 --> 00:05:57,155 - Is that... - Me. 148 00:05:57,190 --> 00:05:59,124 I used to wear blue pants. 149 00:06:03,796 --> 00:06:06,097 When'd you make the leap to interdimensional travel? 150 00:06:06,132 --> 00:06:07,832 I didn't. I did. 151 00:06:07,867 --> 00:06:10,268 Well, well, well. 152 00:06:10,303 --> 00:06:11,836 If it isn't us. 153 00:06:11,871 --> 00:06:13,682 You know the worst part about inventing teleportation? 154 00:06:13,706 --> 00:06:15,284 Suddenly, you're able to travel the whole galaxy, 155 00:06:15,308 --> 00:06:16,608 and the first thing you learn is, 156 00:06:16,643 --> 00:06:18,510 you're the last guy to invent teleportation. 157 00:06:18,545 --> 00:06:21,946 Fortunately, you're about to invent something much more powerful. 158 00:06:23,349 --> 00:06:24,583 What? 159 00:06:31,324 --> 00:06:33,291 Summer, nobody has to know about that. 160 00:06:33,326 --> 00:06:35,471 We could put it right back and pretend we never saw it, 161 00:06:35,495 --> 00:06:36,906 like we did with Dad's mannequin leg. 162 00:06:36,930 --> 00:06:39,464 - Fine, stay here. - I'll rescue Grandpa myself. 163 00:06:39,499 --> 00:06:41,310 - And how are you gonna do that? - I don't know yet. 164 00:06:41,334 --> 00:06:42,500 I'll make it up as I go. 165 00:06:42,535 --> 00:06:43,968 That's what Grandpa Rick does. 166 00:06:44,003 --> 00:06:45,203 That's what heroes do. 167 00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:47,071 Y-You want to see what a hero Rick is? 168 00:06:47,106 --> 00:06:48,873 I-I'll bring you somewhere, Summer. 169 00:06:48,908 --> 00:06:51,576 - Um... - My goodness, children. 170 00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:54,245 Relinquish the illegal technology 171 00:06:54,280 --> 00:06:56,481 to the nearest - Federation representative. 172 00:06:56,516 --> 00:06:58,783 And then we'll all play Balderdash. 173 00:07:14,567 --> 00:07:17,168 Oh, my goodness! Oh, oh! My goo... 174 00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:22,440 Oh, my God. 175 00:07:22,475 --> 00:07:24,909 I have that exact same top. 176 00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:26,344 What is this place? 177 00:07:26,379 --> 00:07:28,179 And what's with "Hunger Games" Summer? 178 00:07:28,214 --> 00:07:32,183 - That's my sister. - This used to be my home. 179 00:07:32,218 --> 00:07:33,685 Imagine doing anything you want, 180 00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:35,753 then hopping to a timeline where you never did it. 181 00:07:35,788 --> 00:07:37,388 Imagine going anywhere, anytime, 182 00:07:37,423 --> 00:07:38,957 with nobody able to stop you. 183 00:07:38,992 --> 00:07:40,558 Sounds lonely. 184 00:07:40,593 --> 00:07:42,360 Lonely? Dude, you have yourself... 185 00:07:42,395 --> 00:07:43,561 Your infinite selves. 186 00:07:43,596 --> 00:07:45,296 It's a nonstop party where all the guests 187 00:07:45,331 --> 00:07:46,764 are the only person we like. 188 00:07:46,799 --> 00:07:48,410 You think it's cool being the smartest man on Earth, 189 00:07:48,434 --> 00:07:50,034 but once we give you this technology, 190 00:07:50,069 --> 00:07:53,037 you become the smartest thing in every conceivable universe... 191 00:07:53,072 --> 00:07:55,607 The Infinite Rick, a god. 192 00:07:55,642 --> 00:07:56,774 Eh, pass. 193 00:07:56,809 --> 00:07:59,544 - Excuse me? - Bro, Ricks don't pass on this. 194 00:07:59,579 --> 00:08:00,778 Who do you think you are? 195 00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:03,047 A different kind of Rick, I guess. 196 00:08:03,082 --> 00:08:05,584 Well, we'll see how long that lasts. 197 00:08:07,620 --> 00:08:09,554 I heard sci-fi noises. 198 00:08:09,589 --> 00:08:11,089 Did you make a breakthrough? 199 00:08:11,124 --> 00:08:12,290 Sort of. 200 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:13,791 I just took a long look at myself, 201 00:08:13,826 --> 00:08:16,628 and I don't think this science thing is gonna pay off. 202 00:08:16,663 --> 00:08:20,131 Well, why don't I get Beth and we'll go out for ice cream? 203 00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:22,233 That, Dianne, is the last great idea 204 00:08:22,268 --> 00:08:24,736 that will ever be had in this garage. 205 00:08:27,540 --> 00:08:30,341 Good roasted Cronenberg, I assume. 206 00:08:30,376 --> 00:08:33,945 Mom, you're looking... feral. 207 00:08:35,014 --> 00:08:36,447 I can't believe Rick did this. 208 00:08:36,482 --> 00:08:37,860 These are the parts of Rick's adventures 209 00:08:37,884 --> 00:08:40,485 you don't get to see... The parts he leaves behind. 210 00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:42,520 All right, it's been great, guys. 211 00:08:42,555 --> 00:08:45,490 I really only wanted to stop by here for a quick "I told ya so." 212 00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:47,458 So, uh... Looking for this? 213 00:08:47,493 --> 00:08:48,671 What are you doing with that? 214 00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:51,029 It stinks of Rick. 215 00:08:51,064 --> 00:08:53,264 No! Why? Why would you do that? 216 00:08:53,299 --> 00:08:55,433 W-W-What is the matter with you people? 217 00:08:55,468 --> 00:08:59,504 You're a bunch of back-savages, backwoods savage morons! 218 00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:03,007 You can never leave. She cannot remain. 219 00:09:03,042 --> 00:09:04,376 She stinks of Rick. 220 00:09:07,847 --> 00:09:09,280 Hold your fire! Hold your fire! 221 00:09:09,315 --> 00:09:11,182 I'm Morty C-137. 222 00:09:11,918 --> 00:09:14,886 We detected a compromised portal gun. Where is your Rick? 223 00:09:14,921 --> 00:09:16,120 He's in prison. Summer. 224 00:09:16,155 --> 00:09:17,622 He got captured by the Federation 225 00:09:17,657 --> 00:09:19,023 and we were going to rescue him. 226 00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:21,459 - Very troubling. - We can't risk Citadel secrets 227 00:09:21,494 --> 00:09:22,960 falling into the Federation's hands. 228 00:09:22,995 --> 00:09:25,196 We'll dispatch S.E.A.L. Team Ricks immediately 229 00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:27,065 to break into the prison holding C-137. 230 00:09:27,100 --> 00:09:29,567 - Boo-yah. - And assassinate him. 231 00:09:29,602 --> 00:09:31,302 Boo-nah? 232 00:09:31,337 --> 00:09:35,073 Come on, girls! The ice cream's gonna melt. 233 00:09:45,752 --> 00:09:49,487 Nooooooo! 234 00:09:49,522 --> 00:09:52,323 Wow. This sauce is fucking amazing. 235 00:09:52,358 --> 00:09:53,758 You said it was promoting a movie? 236 00:09:58,464 --> 00:10:00,998 Carry the three, add a two. 237 00:10:01,033 --> 00:10:03,835 I got it. I fucking got it. 238 00:10:03,870 --> 00:10:06,270 - Whoa. - I-Is that it, the portal gun? 239 00:10:06,305 --> 00:10:08,406 Yeah. That's the three lines of math 240 00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:11,743 that separates my life as a man from my life as an unfeeling ghost. 241 00:10:11,778 --> 00:10:13,211 Awesome-possum. 242 00:10:14,647 --> 00:10:16,047 Mission Control, you getting this? 243 00:10:16,082 --> 00:10:18,783 Holy shit, yes! Yes, we got it! Yeah! 244 00:10:18,818 --> 00:10:21,753 Thanks, Rick. I'll try to remember to shut off the brainalyzer. 245 00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:24,188 Actually, I think - it shuts off automatically 246 00:10:24,223 --> 00:10:25,590 once your brain is liquid. 247 00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:26,758 Don't know, don't care. 248 00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:28,693 Pull me out. 249 00:10:28,728 --> 00:10:30,528 Hey, pull me out. Can you hear me? 250 00:10:30,563 --> 00:10:32,430 - Nope, they cannot. - Why not? 251 00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:35,277 Because the code you just uploaded wasn't actually my portal-gun formula, 252 00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:38,136 it was a virus giving me full control over the brainalyzer. 253 00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:39,915 What are you talking about? This is a memory. 254 00:10:39,939 --> 00:10:41,773 Y-You can't alter details of a memory. 255 00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:44,041 True, but you can alter anything you want 256 00:10:44,076 --> 00:10:46,478 about a totally fabricated origin story. 257 00:10:47,013 --> 00:10:49,113 It's a trap! Abort! I'm still in his Shoney's! 258 00:10:49,148 --> 00:10:51,115 Repeat... we never left his Shoney's! 259 00:10:51,150 --> 00:10:53,417 Mission accomplished, boys. Pull me out. 260 00:10:53,452 --> 00:10:54,619 Roger that. 261 00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:55,831 Okay, have fun in what's left of my brain. 262 00:10:55,855 --> 00:10:57,221 I'm gonna transfer to yours. 263 00:10:57,256 --> 00:10:59,223 Oh, there's not enough room for all my genius, 264 00:10:59,258 --> 00:11:01,325 so I'm leaving you with my fear of wicker furniture, 265 00:11:01,360 --> 00:11:02,794 my desire to play the trumpet, 266 00:11:02,829 --> 00:11:04,269 my tentative plans to purchase a hat, 267 00:11:04,297 --> 00:11:05,930 and six years of improv workshops. 268 00:11:05,965 --> 00:11:07,298 Comedy comes in threes. 269 00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:08,900 It's a trap! Abort! We never left his... 270 00:11:11,270 --> 00:11:13,204 No! 271 00:11:15,942 --> 00:11:17,141 Another day, another dollar. 272 00:11:17,176 --> 00:11:18,743 Am I great insect creature or what? 273 00:11:18,778 --> 00:11:19,944 Congratulations, Agent. 274 00:11:19,979 --> 00:11:21,579 You'll be highly commended for this. 275 00:11:21,614 --> 00:11:23,614 Always wait for permission to feel accomplishment. 276 00:11:23,649 --> 00:11:25,983 That's my motto. One thing still perplexes me... 277 00:11:26,018 --> 00:11:27,819 Why would Rick Sanchez turn himself in? 278 00:11:27,854 --> 00:11:30,321 Well, I'm just a dumb-ass bug, but it's possible Rick knew 279 00:11:30,356 --> 00:11:32,023 he'd be interrogated at this facility, 280 00:11:32,058 --> 00:11:33,825 where we not only keep our most wanted, 281 00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:35,293 but our most sensitive data. 282 00:11:35,328 --> 00:11:37,094 Anyone here with level-nine access could 283 00:11:37,129 --> 00:11:38,830 I don't know, collapse a government. 284 00:11:38,865 --> 00:11:40,198 I'm just gonna go take a dump. 285 00:11:40,233 --> 00:11:42,300 Is it cool if I use the level-nine bathroom? 286 00:11:42,335 --> 00:11:44,702 W-W-What's the level-nine master access code again? 287 00:11:44,737 --> 00:11:47,271 Oh, that's easy... 8-3... 288 00:11:47,306 --> 00:11:48,306 Yeah! 289 00:11:48,341 --> 00:11:49,974 S.E.A.L. Team Ricks in the house! 290 00:11:52,378 --> 00:11:53,511 Hi, Rick. 291 00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:55,013 Bye, Rick. 292 00:11:58,885 --> 00:12:00,518 D-99, y-you okay? 293 00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:05,234 I'm bummed I didn't get to give that insect dick a test-drive. 294 00:12:05,258 --> 00:12:07,169 Wait, wait, wait, wait! T-The Council of Ricks sent us. 295 00:12:07,193 --> 00:12:08,370 We have your Morty and Summer. 296 00:12:08,394 --> 00:12:09,861 They're prisoners on the Citadel. 297 00:12:09,896 --> 00:12:11,195 Great! 298 00:12:11,230 --> 00:12:13,497 Security breach in room 6755. 299 00:12:13,532 --> 00:12:15,900 Lovely. Not only is my plan screwed up, 300 00:12:15,935 --> 00:12:17,401 I also forgot how to improvise. 301 00:12:17,436 --> 00:12:19,370 All security people approach. 302 00:12:19,405 --> 00:12:20,572 Security breach. 303 00:12:27,847 --> 00:12:29,380 A city of Grandpas? 304 00:12:29,415 --> 00:12:31,082 It's the Citadel of Ricks. 305 00:12:31,117 --> 00:12:32,895 All the different Ricks from all the different realities 306 00:12:32,919 --> 00:12:34,563 got together to hide here from the government. 307 00:12:34,587 --> 00:12:36,354 But if every Rick hates the government, 308 00:12:36,389 --> 00:12:37,822 why would they hate Grandpa? 309 00:12:37,857 --> 00:12:39,824 Because Ricks hate themselves the most. 310 00:12:39,859 --> 00:12:42,526 And our Rick is the most... himself. 311 00:12:42,561 --> 00:12:43,828 Not anymore, homey. 312 00:12:43,863 --> 00:12:45,240 S.E.A.L. Team Ricks turned his unibrow 313 00:12:45,264 --> 00:12:47,698 into two brows... With a bullet. 314 00:12:48,968 --> 00:12:51,736 Your Rick's dead! Your Rick's dead! 315 00:12:54,040 --> 00:12:57,341 Sir, Rick D-99 is returning from the mission alone. 316 00:12:57,376 --> 00:13:00,411 Apparently, S.E.A.L. Team Ricks suffered heavy casualties. 317 00:13:00,446 --> 00:13:01,746 Bring him in. 318 00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:04,548 He says he'll only talk to a Rick with higher clearance. 319 00:13:04,583 --> 00:13:06,250 La-di-da. Give me that. 320 00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:09,787 D-99, this is the commander in chief of the Citadel's militia. 321 00:13:09,822 --> 00:13:11,956 Go... Good enough. 322 00:13:13,459 --> 00:13:16,427 He's a spy. Blow him up. I'm gonna go take a shit. 323 00:13:16,462 --> 00:13:18,696 Operating an unregistered portal gun, 324 00:13:18,731 --> 00:13:20,264 radicalizing a Summer, 325 00:13:20,299 --> 00:13:21,933 conspiring with a traitorous Rick. 326 00:13:21,968 --> 00:13:23,100 How do you plead? 327 00:13:23,135 --> 00:13:24,568 How is this a fair trial? 328 00:13:24,603 --> 00:13:26,070 O-Our lawyer is a Morty. 329 00:13:26,105 --> 00:13:28,372 It's not fair, you have no rights, and he's not a lawyer. 330 00:13:28,407 --> 00:13:30,107 We just keep him here because he's fun. 331 00:13:30,142 --> 00:13:31,475 Look at him go. 332 00:13:31,510 --> 00:13:32,610 Ha ha, yeah! 333 00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:35,146 We'll be lenient if you renounce your Rick. 334 00:13:35,181 --> 00:13:36,614 What say you, Summer? 335 00:13:36,649 --> 00:13:37,815 I say fuck you! 336 00:13:37,850 --> 00:13:39,417 My grandpa was my hero. 337 00:13:39,452 --> 00:13:41,263 You killed him - because you were jealous of him. 338 00:13:41,287 --> 00:13:42,920 That's pretty obvious from the haircuts. 339 00:13:42,955 --> 00:13:45,222 So do what you want to me, but let my brother go. 340 00:13:45,257 --> 00:13:46,824 He already renounced Rick. 341 00:13:46,859 --> 00:13:48,059 Morty? 342 00:13:48,094 --> 00:13:49,460 What? 343 00:13:49,495 --> 00:13:52,063 N-No, I don't want to see your Pog collection. 344 00:13:52,098 --> 00:13:54,432 I don't renounce Rick, and I never have. 345 00:13:54,467 --> 00:13:56,934 I was just trying to protect my sister. 346 00:13:56,969 --> 00:13:58,602 I wanted you to have a normal life. 347 00:13:58,637 --> 00:14:00,582 That's something you can't have when Rick shows up. 348 00:14:00,606 --> 00:14:03,341 Everything real turns fake. Everything right is wrong. 349 00:14:03,376 --> 00:14:06,143 All you know is that you know nothing and he knows everything. 350 00:14:06,178 --> 00:14:08,913 And, well... well, - he's not a villain, Summer, 351 00:14:08,948 --> 00:14:10,648 but he shouldn't be your hero. 352 00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:13,985 He's more like a demon or a super fucked up god. 353 00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:16,253 Let's not suck the ghost of his dick too hard. 354 00:14:16,288 --> 00:14:17,788 He was a terrorist, and now he's dead. 355 00:14:17,823 --> 00:14:19,768 Oh, yeah? If you think my Rick's dead, he's alive. 356 00:14:19,792 --> 00:14:21,926 And if you think you're safe, he's coming for you! 357 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:29,711 - Hey, whoa, whoa! - What are you doing in here? 358 00:14:29,735 --> 00:14:32,203 This area's for teleporting the entire Citadel 359 00:14:32,238 --> 00:14:34,839 to somewhere else - using only buttons and dials. 360 00:14:34,874 --> 00:14:36,507 Yeah, well, it's a bad idea 361 00:14:36,542 --> 00:14:39,477 to have it designed that way then, isn't it? 362 00:14:44,517 --> 00:14:46,384 What the fuck 363 00:14:46,419 --> 00:14:48,986 We just teleported into a galactic federal prison. 364 00:14:49,021 --> 00:14:51,489 I'm gonna go take a shit. 365 00:14:51,524 --> 00:14:52,890 Order in the court! 366 00:14:52,925 --> 00:14:54,692 Whoa! What the hell? Oh, my God! 367 00:14:58,397 --> 00:15:00,331 Wait, wait, wait, wait! No, no, no! 368 00:15:02,868 --> 00:15:05,903 Whoa! 369 00:15:05,938 --> 00:15:07,438 Whoa! 370 00:15:14,046 --> 00:15:18,149 The Citadel's been teleported to Federation space. 371 00:15:18,184 --> 00:15:20,684 It's doomed. This has to be C-137, you guys. 372 00:15:20,719 --> 00:15:22,397 What are we gonna do? You know he's coming for us. 373 00:15:22,421 --> 00:15:24,655 All right, calm down! We have his Summer as a hostage. 374 00:15:24,690 --> 00:15:25,823 Obviously, I get her. 375 00:15:25,858 --> 00:15:28,393 You guys play Rick, Laser, Scissors for the Morty. 376 00:15:29,895 --> 00:15:31,395 W-W-What the hell is that? 377 00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:32,964 Payback. 378 00:15:35,534 --> 00:15:37,034 Grandpa Rick! 379 00:15:37,069 --> 00:15:38,602 - Duh! - You're alive! 380 00:15:38,637 --> 00:15:40,905 Rick! - Morty, take this. - You're gonna need it later. 381 00:15:45,311 --> 00:15:47,178 Hold on, hold on. Whoa! 382 00:15:47,213 --> 00:15:48,779 That's enough, Rick. 383 00:15:48,814 --> 00:15:50,581 What... What's this supposed to accomplish? 384 00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:52,583 We have infinite grandkids. 385 00:15:52,618 --> 00:15:54,563 You're trying to use Disney bucks at a Caesar's Palace here. 386 00:15:54,587 --> 00:15:57,121 That's a bluff. He's bluffing, sir. He loves me. 387 00:15:57,156 --> 00:15:59,690 You're a rogue Rick... Irrational, passionate. 388 00:15:59,725 --> 00:16:02,426 You love your grandkids. You came to rescue them. 389 00:16:02,461 --> 00:16:04,228 I came to kill you, bro. 390 00:16:04,263 --> 00:16:05,763 That's not even my original Summer. 391 00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:07,609 Oh, my God. He's not bluffing. He's not bluffing! 392 00:16:07,633 --> 00:16:09,567 R-Rick? Why not shoot through her? 393 00:16:09,602 --> 00:16:11,802 20 yards, nine-gauge plasma pistol, 394 00:16:11,837 --> 00:16:14,271 My first shot would liquify her insides and injure you, 395 00:16:14,306 --> 00:16:15,940 second shot adds recoil. 396 00:16:15,975 --> 00:16:18,120 The risk to me is minimized if I wait for you to shoot her, 397 00:16:18,144 --> 00:16:19,543 which I'm encouraging you to do. 398 00:16:19,578 --> 00:16:21,112 What the fuck Or let her go, 399 00:16:21,147 --> 00:16:22,880 which I will reward with a quicker death. 400 00:16:22,915 --> 00:16:24,448 Because you love her! 401 00:16:24,483 --> 00:16:27,218 Because it's incentive for you to give me my cleanest shot, 402 00:16:27,253 --> 00:16:28,886 which will be your least painful death. 403 00:16:28,921 --> 00:16:31,388 But if you want to die slower than that, I'm super into it. 404 00:16:31,423 --> 00:16:33,401 All you got to do to get that started is kill the girl. 405 00:16:33,425 --> 00:16:35,759 - I hate you! - Not an issue, sweetie. 406 00:16:35,794 --> 00:16:37,628 That's enough! Drop the gun, Rick! 407 00:16:37,663 --> 00:16:39,463 Morty, I know you're too stupid to get this, 408 00:16:39,498 --> 00:16:41,143 but you're really fucking this up right now. 409 00:16:41,167 --> 00:16:43,667 I'm not letting you let my sister die! Drop the gun! 410 00:16:43,702 --> 00:16:45,669 I wasn't gonna let her die, you fucking moron! 411 00:16:45,704 --> 00:16:46,904 - Ha! - Aww. 412 00:16:46,939 --> 00:16:48,506 The point is he thought I was going to. 413 00:16:48,541 --> 00:16:49,940 I totally did, by the way. 414 00:16:49,975 --> 00:16:51,408 You're a fucking moron, Morty. 415 00:16:51,443 --> 00:16:52,676 Morty, you fucking idiot! 416 00:16:52,711 --> 00:16:54,411 You're a serious fucking idiot, Morty! 417 00:16:54,446 --> 00:16:55,980 You basically killed us all! 418 00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:57,975 You're the worst! You're as dumb as a bag of sand. 419 00:17:03,522 --> 00:17:05,156 Who's stupid now, bitch? 420 00:17:05,191 --> 00:17:07,191 Morty, we just got him back! 421 00:17:08,527 --> 00:17:09,927 That was amazing, Morty. 422 00:17:09,962 --> 00:17:11,295 Oh, my God. Wow. 423 00:17:11,330 --> 00:17:12,697 Okay, let's wrap this... 424 00:17:14,366 --> 00:17:16,000 Good job, Morty. Let's go, kids. 425 00:17:16,035 --> 00:17:17,334 What? What happened? 426 00:17:17,369 --> 00:17:19,103 Oldest Rick trick in the book. 427 00:17:19,138 --> 00:17:21,172 "Fake gun, shoot me in standoff." 428 00:17:21,207 --> 00:17:22,473 - Brilliant. - Ha, yeah. 429 00:17:22,508 --> 00:17:25,009 G-Good thing I saw that note. 430 00:17:31,217 --> 00:17:33,017 Can't we just portal home? 431 00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,785 Not until I finish what I started. 432 00:17:34,820 --> 00:17:37,688 And that is how you get level-nine access 433 00:17:37,723 --> 00:17:39,190 without a password. 434 00:17:39,225 --> 00:17:40,958 Freeze! 435 00:17:40,993 --> 00:17:42,826 Employee of the month, ladies and gentlemen. 436 00:17:42,861 --> 00:17:44,906 So, what are you doing with level-nine access anyways? 437 00:17:44,930 --> 00:17:47,698 Destroying the galactic government. Awesome! Whoa, cool! 438 00:17:47,733 --> 00:17:49,811 Are you going to set all their nukes to target each other? 439 00:17:49,835 --> 00:17:51,580 Ooh, or... or reprogram their military portals 440 00:17:51,604 --> 00:17:53,248 to disintegrate - their entire space fleet? 441 00:17:53,272 --> 00:17:55,306 Good pitches, kids. I'm almost proud. 442 00:17:55,341 --> 00:17:57,575 But watch closely as Grandpa topples an empire 443 00:17:57,610 --> 00:18:00,878 by changing a one... to a zero. 444 00:18:03,749 --> 00:18:06,383 Mr. President, the Blemflarck's value just dropped to nothing. 445 00:18:06,418 --> 00:18:09,687 What do you mean? I mean, our single centralized galactic currency 446 00:18:09,722 --> 00:18:13,490 just went from being worth one of itself to zero of itself. 447 00:18:13,525 --> 00:18:15,359 Calm down, people. 448 00:18:15,394 --> 00:18:17,728 Deploy the galactic militia and declare martial law. 449 00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:18,729 Yes, sir. 450 00:18:18,764 --> 00:18:20,564 Uh, what should I pay them with? 451 00:18:20,599 --> 00:18:23,500 Their payment is the honor they'll feel to serve their... 452 00:18:23,535 --> 00:18:25,502 Wait. Who's paying me to yell at this guy? 453 00:18:25,537 --> 00:18:27,905 I can answer that... For money. 454 00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:29,417 I never thought I'd live to see this day. 455 00:18:29,441 --> 00:18:30,774 Gentlemen, gentlemen, gentlemen! 456 00:18:30,809 --> 00:18:33,277 There's a solution here you're not seeing. 457 00:18:36,749 --> 00:18:38,449 Give me your jacket! Give me those pants! 458 00:18:44,290 --> 00:18:46,523 There's no rich people or poor people! 459 00:18:46,558 --> 00:18:48,259 I want more jackets! 460 00:18:48,294 --> 00:18:50,928 He who controls the pants controls the galaxy! 461 00:19:05,077 --> 00:19:09,413 No longer will the insects have domain over surface world! 462 00:19:17,289 --> 00:19:19,556 Jerry, what the hell is happening? 463 00:19:19,591 --> 00:19:21,625 The galactic government collapsed. 464 00:19:21,660 --> 00:19:22,893 Are you okay? 465 00:19:22,928 --> 00:19:24,572 Look, I-I'm not proud to share this, but the truth is, 466 00:19:24,596 --> 00:19:26,297 I just kept crawling, and it kept working. 467 00:19:26,332 --> 00:19:28,132 - Oh, I'm glad you're okay. 468 00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:32,169 Are we ever going to stop paying for indulging your father? 469 00:19:32,204 --> 00:19:35,105 Our children, our planet, our jobs? 470 00:19:35,140 --> 00:19:36,573 Is there anything left to lose? 471 00:19:36,608 --> 00:19:38,942 Just each other, - and I'll never let you go. 472 00:19:38,977 --> 00:19:42,046 And I'm so sorry I ever did this to us. 473 00:19:42,648 --> 00:19:44,915 Guess who dismantled the government? 474 00:19:44,950 --> 00:19:46,850 Please don't leave me again. I never will, baby. 475 00:19:46,885 --> 00:19:48,819 I was right. He turned himself in on purpose. 476 00:19:48,854 --> 00:19:50,254 It was all part of his plan! 477 00:19:50,289 --> 00:19:51,822 Jerry, is there any light beer left? 478 00:19:51,857 --> 00:19:53,590 It's insane what you miss in prison. 479 00:19:53,625 --> 00:19:55,592 Um... okay. No. 480 00:19:55,627 --> 00:19:57,661 No, no, no. Foot down time. 481 00:19:57,696 --> 00:19:59,296 No, you're right. Where's the vodka? 482 00:19:59,331 --> 00:20:01,565 Beth, it's him or me! 483 00:20:04,903 --> 00:20:07,371 Seems like you guys need some privacy. 484 00:20:07,406 --> 00:20:09,707 I'll, uh... I'll be in the garage. 485 00:20:11,710 --> 00:20:15,145 What the fuck Not cool, Jerry! 486 00:20:15,180 --> 00:20:18,949 A man's garage is his castle. 487 00:20:24,590 --> 00:20:26,290 Jerry's going to... 488 00:20:26,325 --> 00:20:28,359 spend some time... 489 00:20:28,394 --> 00:20:29,626 divorced. 490 00:20:29,661 --> 00:20:31,328 Oh, I-I'm sorry to hear that, sweetie. 491 00:20:31,363 --> 00:20:32,741 I hope I had nothing to do with that. 492 00:20:32,765 --> 00:20:35,499 Oh, God, Dad, that is not your burden to bear. 493 00:20:35,534 --> 00:20:38,335 I feel terrible that I misjudged you. 494 00:20:38,370 --> 00:20:40,137 This is gonna be good for Jerry. 495 00:20:40,172 --> 00:20:42,072 For everybody. For everybody. 496 00:20:43,342 --> 00:20:45,209 I better tend to Jerry 497 00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:47,878 before he changes his mind and doesn't move out. 498 00:20:47,913 --> 00:20:50,214 I will leave you two to your adventures. 499 00:20:50,249 --> 00:20:51,915 Oh, my God. Nancy says 500 00:20:51,950 --> 00:20:54,418 they're drawing and quartering aliens in the school courtyard, 501 00:20:54,453 --> 00:20:56,720 and it technically counts as patriotism. 502 00:20:56,755 --> 00:20:59,690 Geez! Are my parents seriously gonna get divorced? 503 00:20:59,725 --> 00:21:01,102 All right, Rick, I'm gonna go to my... 504 00:21:01,126 --> 00:21:02,993 Not so fast, Morty. You heard your mom. 505 00:21:03,028 --> 00:21:05,529 We've got adventures to go on, Morty... just you and me... 506 00:21:05,564 --> 00:21:07,564 And sometimes your sister and sometimes your mom, 507 00:21:07,599 --> 00:21:09,066 but never your dad. 508 00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:10,578 You want to know why, Morty? Because he crossed me. 509 00:21:10,602 --> 00:21:12,403 Okay, take it easy, Rick. T-T-That's dark. 510 00:21:12,438 --> 00:21:13,904 Oh, it gets darker, Morty. 511 00:21:13,939 --> 00:21:15,873 Welcome to the darkest year of our adventures. 512 00:21:15,908 --> 00:21:18,409 First thing that's different... no more Dad, Morty. - Oh, geez. 513 00:21:18,444 --> 00:21:19,921 He threatened to turn me in to the government, 514 00:21:19,945 --> 00:21:22,012 so I made him - and the government go away. 515 00:21:22,047 --> 00:21:23,247 Oh fuck 516 00:21:23,282 --> 00:21:25,616 I've replaced them both as the de facto patriarch 517 00:21:25,651 --> 00:21:27,384 of your family and your universe. 518 00:21:27,419 --> 00:21:29,264 Your mom wouldn't have accepted me if I came home... - Oh, man. 519 00:21:29,288 --> 00:21:30,854 Without you and your sister, 520 00:21:30,889 --> 00:21:32,700 so now you know the real reason I rescued you. - Oh! 521 00:21:32,724 --> 00:21:34,269 I just took over the family, Morty, and if you tell your mom... 522 00:21:34,293 --> 00:21:36,404 Oh, man. - ... or sister I said any of this, I'll deny it, 523 00:21:36,428 --> 00:21:37,939 You're gonna deny it... and they'll take my side because I'm a hero, Morty. 524 00:21:37,963 --> 00:21:39,441 - And now you're gonna have to go... - Oh. 525 00:21:39,465 --> 00:21:41,098 And do whatever I say, Morty, forever! 526 00:21:41,133 --> 00:21:42,977 And I'll... I'll go out and I'll find some more of that 527 00:21:43,001 --> 00:21:46,103 "Mulan" Szechuan teriyaki dipping sauce, Morty. 528 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:48,483 What are you talking about? Because that's that's what this is all about, Morty. 529 00:21:48,507 --> 00:21:50,107 Szechuan? That's my one-armed man! 530 00:21:50,142 --> 00:21:52,242 I'm not driven by avenging my dead family, Morty! 531 00:21:52,277 --> 00:21:53,544 That was fake. 532 00:21:53,579 --> 00:21:55,089 I-I-I'm driven by finding that McNugget sauce. 533 00:21:55,113 --> 00:21:57,381 McNuggets? - I want that "Mulan" McNugget sauce, Morty! 534 00:21:57,416 --> 00:21:58,660 That's my series arc, Morty. What the hell? 535 00:21:58,684 --> 00:22:00,951 If it takes nine seasons, 536 00:22:00,986 --> 00:22:03,698 I want my McNugget dipping sauce, Szechuan sauce, Morty. What are you talking about, Rick? 537 00:22:03,722 --> 00:22:05,567 That's what's gonna take us all the way to the end, Morty. What are you talking about? 538 00:22:05,591 --> 00:22:07,157 Season... Nine more seasons, Morty. 539 00:22:07,192 --> 00:22:09,626 Nine more seasons until I get that dipping Szechuan sauce. 540 00:22:09,661 --> 00:22:11,562 What is that? For 97 more years, Morty! 541 00:22:11,597 --> 00:22:12,763 What are you talking about? 542 00:22:12,798 --> 00:22:14,798 I want that McNugget sauce, Morty! 543 00:22:50,035 --> 00:22:51,001 Is it ready? 544 00:22:51,036 --> 00:22:52,803 - Yes. - We can bring it online now. 545 00:22:52,838 --> 00:22:54,038 Do it. 546 00:22:57,376 --> 00:23:00,110 I am Phoenix Person. 547 00:23:00,145 --> 00:23:02,212 - Phoenix Person? - Is that what we settled on? 548 00:23:02,247 --> 00:23:04,147 I thought we all agreed on Cyber Bird. 549 00:23:04,182 --> 00:23:05,860 You said you didn't care what he was called 550 00:23:05,884 --> 00:23:07,384 as long as we brought him back. 551 00:23:07,419 --> 00:23:08,852 Yeah, but Phoenix Person? 552 00:23:08,887 --> 00:23:10,454 Fine fuck it. Who cares? 553 00:23:11,890 --> 00:23:13,691 Ka-kaw!