1 00:00:03,213 --> 00:00:04,464 Mr. and Mrs. Smith, 2 00:00:04,548 --> 00:00:06,383 thank you for taking time off work to come in. 3 00:00:06,466 --> 00:00:08,677 So, what's this about, Principal Vagina? 4 00:00:08,760 --> 00:00:10,262 Yeah, what is this about? 5 00:00:10,345 --> 00:00:12,264 You're not a leaner. You don't have that in you. 6 00:00:12,347 --> 00:00:14,933 Go sit at your desk like the outer city principal you are. 7 00:00:15,016 --> 00:00:16,351 Morty! Summer! Stop. 8 00:00:16,435 --> 00:00:17,769 Their latest offense had students 9 00:00:17,853 --> 00:00:19,980 packing their gums with this. 10 00:00:20,063 --> 00:00:22,315 This growth gives users perfect memories. 11 00:00:22,399 --> 00:00:24,401 And there's no light way to put this, 12 00:00:24,484 --> 00:00:26,361 the student body now do nothing 13 00:00:26,445 --> 00:00:29,448 but relive their intimate achievements. 14 00:00:29,531 --> 00:00:31,742 Yes, more! More canola oil! 15 00:00:31,825 --> 00:00:34,578 Add to that Morty replacing himself with ninja clones, 16 00:00:34,661 --> 00:00:37,330 Summer making toilets chant your weight when you sit, 17 00:00:37,414 --> 00:00:39,708 and this is their third sci-fi strike this semester. 18 00:00:39,791 --> 00:00:42,586 Morty and Summer are officially expelled. 19 00:00:42,669 --> 00:00:45,005 Expelled? Can't you just suspend them with pay? 20 00:00:45,088 --> 00:00:46,715 What has gotten into you two? 21 00:00:46,798 --> 00:00:48,633 You're unrecognizable lately! 22 00:00:54,514 --> 00:00:55,974 Mom gets red when she's angry. 23 00:00:56,057 --> 00:00:57,684 Do we have any canola oil? 24 00:01:00,270 --> 00:01:01,605 Add muting adults to the list. 25 00:01:01,688 --> 00:01:03,940 So I wasn't having a mental breakdown. Phew! 26 00:01:04,024 --> 00:01:06,318 Quit summoning me like this. People are gonna think I'm a genie. 27 00:01:06,401 --> 00:01:08,653 Dad, the kids just got expelled 28 00:01:08,737 --> 00:01:10,822 for being high-concept assholes. 29 00:01:14,367 --> 00:01:15,494 Turning people into carrots 30 00:01:15,577 --> 00:01:17,579 won't help you beat the genie allegations. 31 00:01:17,662 --> 00:01:19,539 I won't dignify that with a response, Jerry, 32 00:01:19,623 --> 00:01:21,458 but I will make you a carrot at some point. 33 00:01:23,126 --> 00:01:24,127 Too much. Too much! 34 00:01:24,211 --> 00:01:25,879 My bones were my skin and my organs were frozen 35 00:01:25,962 --> 00:01:27,130 in the orange marrow my blood became. 36 00:01:27,214 --> 00:01:28,799 - Oh, dear. - Kids aren't expelled. 37 00:01:28,882 --> 00:01:31,885 They aren't expelled! A! All As! Every class! 38 00:01:31,968 --> 00:01:33,804 Dad, this is why they're so spoiled. 39 00:01:33,887 --> 00:01:36,097 You bail them out before they ever learn a lesson. 40 00:01:36,181 --> 00:01:38,433 Yeah, you turned out so awesome without him. 41 00:01:38,517 --> 00:01:41,102 Don't give Rick that much credit, he's not bailing us out, 42 00:01:41,186 --> 00:01:42,979 he's being a lazy piece of shit. 43 00:01:43,063 --> 00:01:44,064 The fuck you just say? 44 00:01:45,065 --> 00:01:46,316 Little bitch ninja-logged me. 45 00:01:46,399 --> 00:01:48,109 - See? - Okay, you win. 46 00:01:48,193 --> 00:01:49,820 I heard about this sleepaway camp off-world 47 00:01:49,903 --> 00:01:51,655 that rich people ship their spoiled kids to. 48 00:01:51,738 --> 00:01:53,365 You're sending them away? 49 00:01:53,448 --> 00:01:54,908 Shouldn't you be handling it yourself? 50 00:01:54,991 --> 00:01:56,409 This is me handling it. 51 00:01:56,493 --> 00:01:58,370 You want me to find a switch? Bend 'em over? 52 00:01:58,453 --> 00:02:00,789 - Give 'em the ol' hot seat? - I know you're being sarcastic, 53 00:02:00,872 --> 00:02:02,666 but I don't like the excitement in your voice. 54 00:02:02,749 --> 00:02:03,959 - Good. - Oh, whatever. 55 00:02:04,042 --> 00:02:05,627 Keep turning your problems into carrots. 56 00:02:05,710 --> 00:02:06,711 Beth! 57 00:02:07,754 --> 00:02:08,880 Pack your shit. 58 00:02:44,624 --> 00:02:45,625 This is bullshit. 59 00:02:45,709 --> 00:02:47,502 How else are we supposed to treat our normie-ass classmates? 60 00:02:47,586 --> 00:02:49,296 We're literally in space right now. 61 00:02:49,379 --> 00:02:51,840 Yeah, why do we get punished for being better than everyone? 62 00:02:51,923 --> 00:02:53,800 Because you aren't. I am. 63 00:02:53,884 --> 00:02:54,885 You two are remora, 64 00:02:54,968 --> 00:02:57,095 too fucking spoiled to know you're mooching off a shark. 65 00:02:57,178 --> 00:02:58,388 Ugh! Whatever, bro. 66 00:02:58,471 --> 00:03:01,057 Me and Summer have grown so much we arced onto the same page. 67 00:03:01,141 --> 00:03:02,934 But I guess we haven't grown 68 00:03:03,018 --> 00:03:05,896 as much as your fucking bald spot. 69 00:03:05,979 --> 00:03:07,230 Yeah, you dumb bitch! 70 00:03:07,314 --> 00:03:08,982 - It's pickleball-sized now. - Oh, wow. Wow! 71 00:03:09,065 --> 00:03:11,818 Look at Beyoncé, rolling up the partition. 72 00:03:16,531 --> 00:03:17,532 Did I make the cover? 73 00:03:18,074 --> 00:03:20,160 I can't believe you wanted to, you fucking loser. 74 00:03:20,243 --> 00:03:21,953 - Goddamn it! - His thirsty ass picked up 75 00:03:22,037 --> 00:03:23,163 on the first ring. 76 00:03:24,372 --> 00:03:27,000 - What are you doing? - Reminding you who the shark is. 77 00:03:32,339 --> 00:03:35,550 Oh! Thank God. It's… over. 78 00:03:35,634 --> 00:03:37,260 If you thought that dial was bad, 79 00:03:37,344 --> 00:03:38,595 check out this button. 80 00:03:46,895 --> 00:03:48,980 - On your feet, maggots! Let's go! - Move! Move! Move! Move! 81 00:03:49,064 --> 00:03:51,149 Listen, whatever this is, I can't dig holes all summer. 82 00:03:51,232 --> 00:03:53,068 I have gentle hands, piano player's hands! 83 00:03:53,151 --> 00:03:55,028 Well, put those hands to work… 84 00:03:55,111 --> 00:03:58,031 - Doin' whatever the fuck you want! - …doin' whatever the fuck you want! 85 00:03:58,114 --> 00:03:59,866 So, just to be clear… 86 00:03:59,950 --> 00:04:02,118 The kids took over the camp. 87 00:04:02,202 --> 00:04:04,996 Oh. Good? 88 00:04:06,373 --> 00:04:08,458 - You feel that? - The AC? 89 00:04:08,541 --> 00:04:11,753 Beth, you know if it's over 65 degrees, I get hives. 90 00:04:11,836 --> 00:04:15,465 No. This is the first time we've had the house to ourselves since… 91 00:04:16,299 --> 00:04:18,134 I know she keeps drugs in here. 92 00:04:18,218 --> 00:04:20,261 She's 17 and hangs out with my dad. 93 00:04:21,012 --> 00:04:22,263 Ooh, I think I found some. 94 00:04:22,347 --> 00:04:25,308 Oh, thank God. I mean, oh no. 95 00:04:25,392 --> 00:04:27,435 Not sure what goes in what orifice. 96 00:04:27,519 --> 00:04:29,354 This looks familiar enough. 97 00:04:38,530 --> 00:04:40,031 Still got it. 98 00:04:40,991 --> 00:04:42,575 Do you feel anything? 99 00:04:42,659 --> 00:04:43,952 I mean… 100 00:04:44,035 --> 00:04:45,912 I'm feeling… 101 00:04:51,292 --> 00:04:52,585 Great. 102 00:04:53,253 --> 00:04:54,754 We should steal a car! 103 00:04:54,838 --> 00:04:56,673 Beth? Future carrot? 104 00:04:56,756 --> 00:04:59,300 I dropped off the little freaks. You two wanna grab a drink? 105 00:05:00,343 --> 00:05:01,845 We… we are… 106 00:05:01,928 --> 00:05:03,138 We aren't home! 107 00:05:03,221 --> 00:05:05,098 What? Oh! Beth, gross. 108 00:05:05,181 --> 00:05:06,808 Just don't reply next time. 109 00:05:09,477 --> 00:05:11,604 How'd Summer get drugs from Japan? 110 00:05:11,688 --> 00:05:14,232 What even is this stuff? 111 00:05:20,572 --> 00:05:22,699 Oh man, we totally had you guys. 112 00:05:22,782 --> 00:05:24,367 It's not a real camp anymore. 113 00:05:24,451 --> 00:05:27,120 We campers overthrew the counselors years ago. 114 00:05:27,203 --> 00:05:29,330 - Years ago. - Yeah, you goofy hoes! 115 00:05:29,414 --> 00:05:30,623 We run this shit now. 116 00:05:30,707 --> 00:05:32,417 Anything you want, we got. 117 00:05:32,500 --> 00:05:34,377 Anything you wanna do, you do. 118 00:05:34,461 --> 00:05:36,504 Can I fire a bazooka on a skateboard? 119 00:05:36,588 --> 00:05:37,756 Come on, you know the answer. 120 00:05:37,839 --> 00:05:39,174 Oh my God, I'm gonna do it. 121 00:05:39,257 --> 00:05:41,384 So what happened to the counselors? 122 00:05:41,468 --> 00:05:42,635 Murdered 'em. 123 00:05:44,804 --> 00:05:45,889 - Fuck. - Oh God. 124 00:05:45,972 --> 00:05:47,307 That's where we dump our lame. 125 00:05:47,390 --> 00:05:48,892 Pretty sick, right? 126 00:05:48,975 --> 00:05:52,187 Sickly… awesome. 127 00:05:52,270 --> 00:05:53,646 Let's give 'em a tour. 128 00:05:55,356 --> 00:05:56,357 Ow! Ow! Ow! 129 00:05:56,441 --> 00:05:58,485 - Is he okay? - Oh God. Who gives a shit? 130 00:05:59,861 --> 00:06:02,280 That's the amphitheater. Great place to get fucked. 131 00:06:04,157 --> 00:06:05,408 That's the archery range. 132 00:06:05,492 --> 00:06:07,035 Perfect place to get fucked. 133 00:06:07,118 --> 00:06:08,536 That's the cafeteria. 134 00:06:08,620 --> 00:06:10,246 - Super awesome place… - We get it. 135 00:06:10,330 --> 00:06:12,874 But where does everything else, like, come from? 136 00:06:12,957 --> 00:06:16,169 A bunch of us have trust funds, so we just DoorDash anything we want. 137 00:06:16,252 --> 00:06:18,797 Greek food incoming. 138 00:06:18,880 --> 00:06:20,548 And… no tip. 139 00:06:20,632 --> 00:06:22,634 What? I didn't see him make it. 140 00:06:22,717 --> 00:06:26,387 Excuse me, Edward Merlot Hands coming through. 141 00:06:26,471 --> 00:06:29,182 Look, you're the first kids to show up here in ages. 142 00:06:29,265 --> 00:06:31,643 - So… - Do you two solemnly swear 143 00:06:31,726 --> 00:06:33,645 to dedicate your life to the party? 144 00:06:36,689 --> 00:06:38,191 - Whoop-whoop! - Yeah! 145 00:06:38,274 --> 00:06:40,610 I'm gonna party 'til my face fucking melts off! 146 00:06:43,696 --> 00:06:46,074 Well, I guess being high forever isn't all bad. 147 00:06:46,157 --> 00:06:47,283 I'll lose my job 148 00:06:47,367 --> 00:06:49,744 and try to understand Jackson Pollock paintings. 149 00:06:49,828 --> 00:06:51,538 It was a visualization of suicide. 150 00:06:51,621 --> 00:06:53,540 Aw, it totally was. 151 00:06:53,623 --> 00:06:55,083 You ruined it! 152 00:06:55,166 --> 00:06:56,543 Are we really gonna be high forever? 153 00:06:56,626 --> 00:06:57,836 Can we Google this? 154 00:06:57,919 --> 00:06:59,671 We can Google anything. 155 00:07:03,383 --> 00:07:04,384 Oh, Jer Bear, look! 156 00:07:04,467 --> 00:07:06,219 They have some version of Narcan at a pharmacy 157 00:07:06,302 --> 00:07:07,512 the next solar system over. 158 00:07:07,595 --> 00:07:08,930 How are we supposed to get there? 159 00:07:09,013 --> 00:07:11,224 My dad has a way to hail space cabs in the garage. 160 00:07:11,307 --> 00:07:13,601 - Come on. - How's this not needing him? 161 00:07:13,685 --> 00:07:16,813 'Cause we're doing it behind his back. 162 00:07:19,232 --> 00:07:21,568 How do these work again? 163 00:07:21,651 --> 00:07:24,237 Like this. Watch. 164 00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:25,488 Oh, wow. 165 00:07:27,740 --> 00:07:29,075 Oh, that's way easier! 166 00:07:29,159 --> 00:07:30,660 You can't back out of this deal. 167 00:07:30,743 --> 00:07:33,121 I got a pallet full of people-sized carrots. 168 00:07:33,204 --> 00:07:34,455 Not your problem? 169 00:07:34,539 --> 00:07:35,999 Oh, it's about to be. 170 00:07:36,875 --> 00:07:39,169 If we make irregular rhythms, 171 00:07:39,252 --> 00:07:41,045 he can't hear us under there. 172 00:07:41,129 --> 00:07:44,132 He's your dad, not the god of Arrakis. 173 00:07:46,551 --> 00:07:48,469 All right, Zarz Dinnarz will be here 174 00:07:48,553 --> 00:07:51,639 in what I'm guessing is three minutes… 175 00:07:52,223 --> 00:07:53,683 Oh, that was seconds. 176 00:07:53,766 --> 00:07:56,311 Hey! For Rick? 177 00:07:56,394 --> 00:07:58,730 You may enter me. 178 00:07:59,647 --> 00:08:00,648 Okay. 179 00:08:02,567 --> 00:08:03,693 Please sit still. 180 00:08:03,776 --> 00:08:06,863 I have taken a form your butts desire. 181 00:08:07,572 --> 00:08:10,575 Oh my God! This is the exact limo we took to prom. 182 00:08:10,658 --> 00:08:12,702 Those can't be real pretzels? 183 00:08:12,785 --> 00:08:14,454 Oh, isn't this amazing? 184 00:08:14,537 --> 00:08:16,497 It's like we're hanging out as kids again. 185 00:08:16,581 --> 00:08:19,459 Oh, everything's slick like a womb. 186 00:08:19,542 --> 00:08:21,252 Oh, I need to get baby-sized. 187 00:08:21,336 --> 00:08:23,379 If I'm born, I'll rip my mother from crack to crack! 188 00:08:23,463 --> 00:08:25,048 Everything okay back there? 189 00:08:25,131 --> 00:08:27,050 Do you have an umbilical cord? 190 00:08:27,133 --> 00:08:29,469 What? Are you people high? 191 00:08:29,552 --> 00:08:31,012 Oh, we shouldn't have done this, Beth. 192 00:08:31,095 --> 00:08:32,764 We're too old to be this high. 193 00:08:32,847 --> 00:08:34,933 Oh, sweetie, I'm right here with you. 194 00:08:35,016 --> 00:08:37,352 You're safe. We're safe. 195 00:08:42,482 --> 00:08:43,816 Wow. 196 00:08:43,900 --> 00:08:45,902 It's like prom night all over again. 197 00:08:45,985 --> 00:08:47,612 You found the right hole eventually. 198 00:08:47,695 --> 00:08:48,780 Where's the moonroof? 199 00:08:48,863 --> 00:08:51,616 I need to tell the universe that Beth Sanchez is the best thing 200 00:08:51,699 --> 00:08:53,201 that's ever happened to me! 201 00:08:53,284 --> 00:08:55,203 - Aw, Jer. - What? Please remain seated. 202 00:08:55,286 --> 00:08:58,414 But how will the cosmos know how I feel? 203 00:09:00,917 --> 00:09:02,335 No, no, no, no, no, no! 204 00:09:03,503 --> 00:09:05,088 My dermis! 205 00:09:08,633 --> 00:09:09,634 Oh my God! 206 00:09:19,102 --> 00:09:22,313 Thank you for choosing Zarz Dinnarz. 207 00:09:22,397 --> 00:09:24,107 Oh my gosh, is he dying? 208 00:09:24,190 --> 00:09:26,025 No, I'm just tired. 209 00:09:26,901 --> 00:09:29,362 I've been doing a lot of airport runs at night. 210 00:10:24,959 --> 00:10:26,252 Bitch, move. 211 00:10:26,336 --> 00:10:29,422 These assholes have way more stamina 212 00:10:29,505 --> 00:10:30,923 for being assholes. 213 00:10:31,424 --> 00:10:35,219 Boys… Margo's gonna blow! 214 00:10:38,348 --> 00:10:40,141 Oh, look at that, a fart baby! 215 00:10:40,224 --> 00:10:41,225 What the fuck? 216 00:10:41,309 --> 00:10:44,395 - Oh my God. - False alarm. Just another baby. 217 00:10:44,479 --> 00:10:45,980 Get that fart baby a beer! 218 00:10:46,064 --> 00:10:48,316 Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! 219 00:10:48,399 --> 00:10:50,318 Is that kid gonna be okay? 220 00:10:50,401 --> 00:10:53,029 Fart Baby? Yeah, man. He will be if he parties. 221 00:10:53,112 --> 00:10:55,531 - Fart Baby party! - Dude, this has gotten out of hand. 222 00:10:55,615 --> 00:10:58,534 Yeah, we gotta bounce before we turn into even bigger assholes. 223 00:10:58,618 --> 00:11:00,536 What's this talk about leavin'? 224 00:11:00,620 --> 00:11:03,039 Yeah, we're having a good time, right? 225 00:11:03,122 --> 00:11:06,042 Kind of feels like we aren't free to go. 226 00:11:06,125 --> 00:11:08,044 - Isn't that technically a rule? - Nah, man. 227 00:11:08,127 --> 00:11:10,546 Besides, all that's out there is that shitty-ass town. 228 00:11:10,630 --> 00:11:12,548 - We just need to call our grandpa. - No phone calls. 229 00:11:12,632 --> 00:11:15,051 Okay. I'm sorry, but see, that's two rules. 230 00:11:15,134 --> 00:11:17,553 Fuck that shit. You guys took an oath to rage, 231 00:11:17,637 --> 00:11:19,055 and now you want to skip out on one? 232 00:11:19,138 --> 00:11:22,058 Yeah, I'm starting to get a real lame vibe from these two. 233 00:11:22,141 --> 00:11:26,020 And you saw the dead pile of lame people, right? 234 00:11:27,814 --> 00:11:28,981 Oh, now look what you did. 235 00:11:29,065 --> 00:11:30,358 Fart Baby's crying. 236 00:11:30,441 --> 00:11:31,818 It's okay, Fart Baby. 237 00:11:31,901 --> 00:11:33,069 They're not going anywhere. 238 00:11:33,152 --> 00:11:34,153 They're gonna rage. 239 00:11:34,237 --> 00:11:36,322 Oh, no, no. We're cool. 240 00:11:36,406 --> 00:11:38,032 Then prove it. 241 00:11:45,498 --> 00:11:47,917 I wish we hadn't given beer to that baby. 242 00:11:50,503 --> 00:11:53,798 Oh, Beth, I had the strangest dream 243 00:11:53,881 --> 00:11:56,134 we got high forever. 244 00:11:58,010 --> 00:12:01,097 Yeah, this makes a lot more sense. 245 00:12:02,140 --> 00:12:05,351 Honey, how long have we been here? 246 00:12:05,435 --> 00:12:06,727 Couple days? Couple weeks? 247 00:12:06,811 --> 00:12:09,272 This store planet has an artificial sky. 248 00:12:09,355 --> 00:12:10,481 Jerry, look! 249 00:12:16,904 --> 00:12:19,282 Damn it! It's in jail with the deodorant. 250 00:12:19,365 --> 00:12:20,908 Paging associate. Please wait. 251 00:12:20,992 --> 00:12:23,327 Okay, he's on his way. 252 00:12:23,411 --> 00:12:25,204 Paging associate. Please wait. 253 00:12:27,498 --> 00:12:28,624 Paging associate. Please wait. 254 00:12:28,708 --> 00:12:30,668 Because he was a bus ride away. Right. 255 00:12:30,751 --> 00:12:32,211 The whole planet is a mall. 256 00:12:32,295 --> 00:12:34,172 - Paging associate. Please wait. - I hope he gets here soon. 257 00:12:34,839 --> 00:12:36,591 - Oh my God. - Oh. 258 00:12:36,674 --> 00:12:38,509 - He's at an airport. - Paging associate. Please wait. 259 00:12:38,593 --> 00:12:40,803 - Connecting flight? - I can't take this anymore! 260 00:12:42,847 --> 00:12:44,390 Hey, stop right there! 261 00:12:44,974 --> 00:12:46,434 - Oh! - Yes! 262 00:12:56,903 --> 00:12:58,029 Did it work? 263 00:12:58,112 --> 00:13:01,115 Are we un-high? 264 00:13:02,867 --> 00:13:05,119 We have too few hearts, Jerry. 265 00:13:05,203 --> 00:13:07,079 Too few hearts! 266 00:13:07,163 --> 00:13:09,874 - Beth, I called Rick. - What? 267 00:13:09,957 --> 00:13:12,502 You have a cosmic safety net for a dad. 268 00:13:12,585 --> 00:13:13,586 Embrace it. 269 00:13:13,669 --> 00:13:15,254 Well, that makes me feel like a baby. 270 00:13:15,338 --> 00:13:17,423 It's okay to be a baby sometimes. 271 00:13:17,507 --> 00:13:19,509 I've been a baby our entire marriage. 272 00:13:19,592 --> 00:13:21,427 But we should all get a turn. 273 00:13:21,511 --> 00:13:22,762 Well… 274 00:13:22,845 --> 00:13:24,430 Well, I did have fun. 275 00:13:24,514 --> 00:13:25,515 Me too. 276 00:13:25,598 --> 00:13:28,643 Oh, now I'm invited to hang. 277 00:13:30,853 --> 00:13:33,523 Oh, everyone wants Grandpa's help, 278 00:13:33,606 --> 00:13:36,025 but nobody wants Grandpa. 279 00:13:36,943 --> 00:13:38,861 If we had a car, I'd roll the windows up. 280 00:13:38,945 --> 00:13:40,613 Bars have phones, right? 281 00:13:42,323 --> 00:13:43,741 Well, woo! 282 00:13:43,824 --> 00:13:45,117 Look who came down the mountain 283 00:13:45,201 --> 00:13:47,745 to grace us with their presence. 284 00:13:47,828 --> 00:13:49,580 I didn't think you camp assholes 285 00:13:49,664 --> 00:13:50,831 ever left your bubble. 286 00:13:50,915 --> 00:13:52,208 Who gives a shit, lady? 287 00:13:52,291 --> 00:13:54,585 This may be a literal matter of life and death. 288 00:13:54,669 --> 00:13:56,045 Can we phone our grandfather? 289 00:13:56,128 --> 00:13:58,089 Did not hear a "please." 290 00:13:58,172 --> 00:13:59,590 - Bitch, oh my God! - Fine, please! 291 00:13:59,674 --> 00:14:01,133 "Bitch"? Excuse me? 292 00:14:01,217 --> 00:14:03,219 I don't think you can reclaim words, 293 00:14:03,302 --> 00:14:05,471 so I don't appreciate that. One call. 294 00:14:05,555 --> 00:14:07,473 Oh my God, thank you so much. 295 00:14:07,557 --> 00:14:09,100 - What's his number? - Twelve. 296 00:14:09,183 --> 00:14:11,185 Twelve? That's a phone number? 297 00:14:14,939 --> 00:14:16,315 Grandpa Rick, you need to come get us! 298 00:14:16,399 --> 00:14:17,817 The campers killed the guards and counselors, 299 00:14:17,900 --> 00:14:19,652 and now they're living it up by themselves and won't let us leave, 300 00:14:19,735 --> 00:14:21,153 and I know it seems like we've learned nothing 301 00:14:21,237 --> 00:14:23,281 but we're done being spoiled assholes. 302 00:14:24,532 --> 00:14:25,533 Here's the thing. 303 00:14:27,118 --> 00:14:28,703 Rick? Hello? 304 00:14:32,665 --> 00:14:33,666 Bye. 305 00:14:34,250 --> 00:14:35,293 Okay, what the fuck? 306 00:14:35,376 --> 00:14:38,462 Couldn't help but hear there's a load of rich kids 307 00:14:38,546 --> 00:14:42,341 up at that camp completely unsupervised. 308 00:14:42,425 --> 00:14:46,971 Oh, not sure if there's a reason everyone needs to know that. 309 00:14:47,054 --> 00:14:48,264 Oh, there is. 310 00:14:48,889 --> 00:14:50,349 It's visiting day. 311 00:14:51,100 --> 00:14:52,977 For our guns. 312 00:14:53,060 --> 00:14:56,272 Am I high or are the kids in danger? 313 00:14:56,355 --> 00:14:57,356 Both. 314 00:14:58,899 --> 00:15:00,651 We're being punished by the universe. 315 00:15:00,735 --> 00:15:02,903 Beth, slap me. It'll sober me up. 316 00:15:04,071 --> 00:15:05,239 Ow! Ow! 317 00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:08,451 Did you see how I went up and back down? 318 00:15:08,534 --> 00:15:10,911 Dad, we need to save the kids in a way 319 00:15:10,995 --> 00:15:13,414 where they think we're not fuckups they can just blow off. 320 00:15:13,497 --> 00:15:16,751 Okay, okay, just give me a sec. 321 00:15:17,543 --> 00:15:19,795 - Dad! - Am I not standing yet? 322 00:15:20,755 --> 00:15:23,883 Why are you so dense? 323 00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:29,388 Carry the two… 324 00:15:29,472 --> 00:15:31,057 All right. All right. 325 00:15:31,140 --> 00:15:33,309 Kids, ho! 326 00:15:35,978 --> 00:15:38,022 Ow. Did it work? 327 00:15:39,106 --> 00:15:41,400 Are you Rick? 328 00:15:41,484 --> 00:15:43,110 Yes. 329 00:15:43,194 --> 00:15:47,114 The same Rick we just pushed through? 330 00:15:47,198 --> 00:15:48,366 Oh God. 331 00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:51,077 Is this where the kids are? 332 00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:52,620 I'm too fuckin' high for this. 333 00:15:52,703 --> 00:15:54,288 We pushed you through… 334 00:15:54,372 --> 00:15:57,625 and you came out. 335 00:16:01,545 --> 00:16:03,714 Do you feel different? 336 00:16:04,799 --> 00:16:05,800 I don't know. 337 00:16:06,384 --> 00:16:07,551 Do I? 338 00:16:09,595 --> 00:16:11,972 Okey dokey, artichokey. 339 00:16:12,056 --> 00:16:14,642 It's ransom time. 340 00:16:14,725 --> 00:16:16,811 We googled your parents, and I gotta tell you something, 341 00:16:16,894 --> 00:16:20,398 you kids are some real silver spoon fucks. 342 00:16:20,481 --> 00:16:22,525 Except for you two, you two aren't rich at all. 343 00:16:22,608 --> 00:16:23,609 - Ouch. - Hurtful. 344 00:16:23,693 --> 00:16:27,571 What'll be "hurtful" is if we don't get our money! 345 00:16:27,655 --> 00:16:30,658 So you better pray Mommy and Daddy pick up the phone. 346 00:16:30,741 --> 00:16:32,910 Yeah? Let's hit it, boys. 347 00:16:34,578 --> 00:16:35,621 We're screwed! 348 00:16:35,705 --> 00:16:38,332 Someone's folks will pay up, and we'll be out of here in no time. 349 00:16:38,416 --> 00:16:39,417 You don't know that. 350 00:16:39,500 --> 00:16:40,751 All of our parents left us here 351 00:16:40,835 --> 00:16:42,753 'cause we're spoiled pieces of shit. 352 00:16:42,837 --> 00:16:44,964 Maybe they aren't ever coming back. 353 00:16:45,631 --> 00:16:46,757 Oh, thank Christ. 354 00:16:47,717 --> 00:16:49,009 It's different. 355 00:16:49,093 --> 00:16:50,594 Wow, it is. 356 00:16:50,678 --> 00:16:53,139 Hey, Morty! You're here. 357 00:16:53,723 --> 00:16:55,391 Rick, get us out of this nightmare. 358 00:16:55,474 --> 00:16:58,060 Sure thing, Morty. 359 00:16:58,144 --> 00:17:00,146 Morty. 360 00:17:00,229 --> 00:17:02,106 Morty. 361 00:17:02,189 --> 00:17:03,774 - I like that. - What the… 362 00:17:03,858 --> 00:17:05,234 Quit messing around. 363 00:17:05,317 --> 00:17:06,652 Where's the portal gun? 364 00:17:06,736 --> 00:17:09,864 I think I… I think I left it in the shopping cart. 365 00:17:09,947 --> 00:17:11,407 - What? - Did you guys smoke 366 00:17:11,490 --> 00:17:12,825 my High Forever? 367 00:17:12,908 --> 00:17:14,827 Look at me. Look at me. 368 00:17:14,910 --> 00:17:16,662 You can't get angry, Summer. 369 00:17:16,746 --> 00:17:18,247 I gave it to you. Probably. 370 00:17:18,330 --> 00:17:20,207 - Oh my God! - Wow. They're out of their gourds. 371 00:17:20,291 --> 00:17:21,959 We are zooted. 372 00:17:22,042 --> 00:17:23,753 This is why we've been acting out. 373 00:17:23,836 --> 00:17:26,297 Because we have absolute psychos as role models. 374 00:17:26,380 --> 00:17:27,798 You guys are bad parents. 375 00:17:27,882 --> 00:17:29,300 Boo! 376 00:17:30,259 --> 00:17:32,136 This version of everyone's mean. 377 00:17:32,219 --> 00:17:35,806 You know what? That man over there is the smartest man in the universe, 378 00:17:35,890 --> 00:17:37,433 and he always bails us out. 379 00:17:37,516 --> 00:17:39,268 But he ain't bailing out shit right now. 380 00:17:39,351 --> 00:17:40,561 We need to save ourselves. 381 00:17:40,644 --> 00:17:42,813 Now put that affluenza to good use 382 00:17:42,897 --> 00:17:44,899 and be the campers who took over this camp. 383 00:17:44,982 --> 00:17:45,983 Great speech, Summer. 384 00:17:46,066 --> 00:17:47,818 You think so? I tried to keep it tight. 385 00:17:47,902 --> 00:17:49,403 No, no. It felt good. I'm fired up. 386 00:17:49,487 --> 00:17:51,489 If we could just get to the archery shed. 387 00:17:51,572 --> 00:17:52,865 We just need a distraction. 388 00:17:54,116 --> 00:17:56,744 Can't believe these kids had access to bidets 389 00:17:56,827 --> 00:17:57,912 and didn't think to use them. 390 00:17:57,995 --> 00:17:59,371 I really hate standing guard. 391 00:17:59,455 --> 00:18:01,457 I want to get back to powerwashing my asshole. 392 00:18:02,082 --> 00:18:03,083 Huh? 393 00:18:04,919 --> 00:18:06,879 Look, pal, don't know how you got here, 394 00:18:06,962 --> 00:18:08,672 but you are clearly lost. 395 00:18:11,759 --> 00:18:14,136 Fuckin' die, you stupid bitch. 396 00:18:14,220 --> 00:18:17,556 Jesus Christ! He's so high he's walkin' through people! 397 00:18:34,365 --> 00:18:36,367 Goddamn, maybe I could have just yelled 398 00:18:36,450 --> 00:18:37,868 "Over there!" or something? 399 00:18:41,497 --> 00:18:44,500 Let's take back this camp… again. 400 00:19:02,268 --> 00:19:03,310 Headshot! 401 00:19:06,105 --> 00:19:07,106 Rad. 402 00:19:07,189 --> 00:19:09,483 Jesus! I'm saying 403 00:19:09,567 --> 00:19:12,111 I have captured your child. 404 00:19:12,194 --> 00:19:13,445 Be more worried! 405 00:19:13,529 --> 00:19:15,948 Oh, that's good to hear he's still having a nice time at camp. 406 00:19:16,657 --> 00:19:18,951 Hello? Oh my… They… Click? 407 00:19:19,034 --> 00:19:21,996 Click? I'll click you! That motherfucker hung up. 408 00:19:25,666 --> 00:19:27,585 Do not just stand there. Get him! 409 00:19:30,254 --> 00:19:32,256 Oh God! I'm only one guy. 410 00:19:32,339 --> 00:19:34,425 I already got hit with an arrow! 411 00:19:36,302 --> 00:19:38,804 Why is this so triumphant? 412 00:19:39,430 --> 00:19:40,431 - Mom! - Mom! 413 00:19:41,015 --> 00:19:43,267 Put the bows down slowly. 414 00:19:43,350 --> 00:19:45,603 Jerry, tell me you see that. 415 00:19:46,353 --> 00:19:48,689 Oh, look, there's more over there. 416 00:19:48,772 --> 00:19:50,566 What's going on? What are they doing? 417 00:19:50,649 --> 00:19:51,650 Ow! 418 00:19:51,734 --> 00:19:53,652 Damn it. "Look over there" would have worked. 419 00:19:53,736 --> 00:19:55,863 All right, all right! Dial it down. 420 00:19:55,946 --> 00:19:57,990 I'm surrendering. I know when I'm beat. 421 00:19:58,073 --> 00:19:59,950 Fuckin' A right. See ya. 422 00:20:00,034 --> 00:20:01,785 Whoa, guys! We won! 423 00:20:01,869 --> 00:20:04,163 Jesus, these rich kids are nutballs. 424 00:20:04,246 --> 00:20:05,998 See what I mean? We're the same. 425 00:20:06,081 --> 00:20:07,625 I wouldn't go that far. 426 00:20:23,182 --> 00:20:24,475 Won't he drown? 427 00:20:25,559 --> 00:20:26,727 Nah, he'll be fine. 428 00:20:26,810 --> 00:20:28,228 Might even sober him up. 429 00:20:28,812 --> 00:20:31,106 Dad, I want you to meet Fart Baby. 430 00:20:31,190 --> 00:20:32,566 It only drinks beer. 431 00:20:36,528 --> 00:20:38,280 Thanks for coming to pick us up, Space Mom. 432 00:20:38,364 --> 00:20:39,490 Yeah, yeah. No problem. 433 00:20:39,573 --> 00:20:41,742 Let's get out of this camp that didn't work at all. 434 00:20:41,825 --> 00:20:43,953 Is that Bill fucking Pullman? 435 00:20:44,578 --> 00:20:46,872 Maybe this was good for all of us. 436 00:20:46,956 --> 00:20:48,999 Maybe it will chill us all out. 437 00:20:49,083 --> 00:20:51,085 Shut up. Don't tell your parents how to parent. 438 00:20:51,168 --> 00:20:52,544 I want Del Taco now! 439 00:20:52,628 --> 00:20:54,129 How long does this high even last? 440 00:20:54,213 --> 00:20:57,007 - Forever! - That's just the name, Mom. 441 00:20:57,091 --> 00:20:59,009 Should be normal… in a few days. 442 00:20:59,093 --> 00:21:01,887 Summer, did they take that stuff I gave you for a rainy day? 443 00:21:01,971 --> 00:21:03,764 Why don't you fuck us anymore? 444 00:21:03,847 --> 00:21:05,683 Yeah! We had a good thing going. 445 00:21:05,766 --> 00:21:07,518 Del Taco! 446 00:21:07,601 --> 00:21:08,894 The one Dawn works at. 447 00:21:08,978 --> 00:21:10,729 - Fucking throuple us. - Come on. 448 00:21:10,813 --> 00:21:12,022 We're gonna see Dawn! 449 00:21:12,106 --> 00:21:14,775 This ride is all the scared straight we need. 450 00:21:46,473 --> 00:21:48,809 Kids these days love two things: 451 00:21:48,892 --> 00:21:52,187 the latest trends and animals selling vices. 452 00:21:52,271 --> 00:21:56,275 Ladies and gentlemen, I give you "Cool Horse." 453 00:22:07,077 --> 00:22:09,705 Just fucking do it already! 454 00:22:09,788 --> 00:22:12,833 The horse does seem cool. 455 00:22:14,418 --> 00:22:15,836 Did you get any of that?