Here's how I first met Jay Brown.
I was into bottle service, low-rise jeans, and had just done a cameo on Entourage.
- Hey. - Hey.
We're looking for my dad. Have you seen him?
Uh, yeah, yeah.
He's, uh, in Coach's office, yelling at your brothers.
But it wasn't until I sat in on the draft night war room
that we became friends.
We stayed up all night talking about basketball and the Mad Men finale.
Hey.
After that, we leaned on each other.
Part of me wondered what it'd be like to be with him.
But what's that saying? Right person, wrong time.
Okay.
Thank you.
Maybe we were never meant to be.
Uh, green tea, splash of oat milk, no sweetener for Jay?
Or maybe we are?
- Jay! What? - Hey.
- What are you doing here? - I, uh… I just got in town.
Yeah, we, uh, got a few days off before the playoffs.
And Olivia Anne wanted the girls to see their LA doctor
for their vaccine exemptions.
- Well, it's great to see you. - Yeah, congrats on a great season.
Oh, thank you.
Um, yeah, your… your defense is…
You know, I'm sorry. I am physically unable to compliment Boston.
- How long are you in town? - Not long, but I'd love to…
Sorry, hold on.
Work stuff…
- I gotta get going. I'm sorry. - It's okay.
Caramel frappé, extra whip, and four birthday cake pops for Isla.
Huh.
- Four? - I did not order that.
I walk in chill Still shut shit down
Smile real sweet But I ain't no clown
I keep it real cute But I cut real quick…
Ali, I'm telling you. He was seconds from asking me out.
Was he? Sounds like you were seconds away from offering up your body.
Ali, there was a pregnant pause. Now I know what that means.
I think it's finally our time.
Okay, that's a very judgy "hmm."
You just got out of an eight-year relationship. Have some fun.
I am trying to have fun, Ali. I'm trying to have fun with Jay.
Isla, your first post-Lev hookup needs to be low stakes.
Someone you'll never see again.
You know, like that guy when we were in Vegas.
Or that guy in Cabo. Or that other guy in Cabo.
Okay, I get the point. I'm a retired slut.
And it's time for you to get back to the streets, so please don't text Jay.
Or send him conspiracy reels on Instagram.
Ali, the sinking of the Titanic was not an accident.
- There is proof. - Uh… I'm leaving.
Feeling pretty good. We locked up the top seed of the playoffs.
Tommy and Travis are playing well together,
and Ness stopped FaceTiming us from the bathroom.
We're gonna have to figure something out because my office is a dead zone.
Before we pop champagne, I have a potential problem to address.
The LA Snowcats want out of their lease so they can play at the new Cal Center.
What?
- What? - Fucking McShays!
They have one year left on their contract. Who do they think they are?
Seriously, who are they?
The McShays. They're the owners of the LA Snowcats hockey team.
They've been our arena tenants for decades.
Our families have never gotten along
'cause their granddaddy had California citrus money,
and he looked down on our pappy
for making his fortune stealing Western Union money grams.
And now they're jealous of us because we own LA's premier franchise,
and they have… hockey.
I got an idea.
Jackie, send them a fax that says, "Choke on deez nuts."
Guys, I hate them as much as you do, but we don't have a lot of options here.
I think we should sue them for breach of contract.
If we sue them, they'll just leave in a year anyway.
Their rent makes up 25% of our arena income.
As much as they suck, we have to get them to stay.
Yeah, well, I'm not talking to Luke McShay.
He ratted on me when I cheated in high school.
I'll handle Luke.
Cam Gordon.
Can I help you?
I'm Missy Farnioli with the LA County Probation Department.
This is a random work drug test court ordered by the City of LA.
Are you fucking kidding me? It's Good Friday. Shame on you.
I cannot leave this building without your urine.
Noncompliance will result in a violation of the terms of your probation.
Fine.
I'll have to push a few meetings, so you're gonna have to wait.
Okay.
Fucking narc.
Yeah, that's not an insult. I literally am one.
I got your text. What's up?
Be cool.
- I need you to pee in this cup. - Oh, I peed when I got in here.
What? Why else would I tell you to come in here?
I thought it was weird,
but the relationship is too new for me to ask questions.
You're gonna squeak out a few more drops. Come on.
Luke McShay, it's been a long time.
How's your…
Having trouble finishing the sentence because you don't know anything about me?
- Come on, we've been friends for decades. - Really?
Is that why you and your brothers used to call me Puke McGay?
- I'm gay, so I can laugh. - And I was laughing about something else.
Now, Luke, what can we do to keep you in the arena?
You wanna know the best part about the new arena?
It's not the VIP suites, the state-of-the-art locker rooms.
It's the fact that we'll never have to deal with you lowlifes ever again.
- Lowlifes? - Lowlifes.
Do I have to remind you that you own a hockey team?
Oh my God, there it is.
Your dad bought a cheap-ass basketball team 50 years ago,
and now you think you have class?
But you're still the same dirtbags you always were.
I don't think your mom thought my dad was a dirtbag
that week they just happened to be in Honolulu.
She was scouting a player.
Oh right, there's all those really famous Hawaiian hockey players.
You know what? Good luck filling your arena 45 nights a year.
- Good luck with that. - We'll sue you.
- You have a year left in your contract. - I hope this isn't how you run your team.
We're in the playoffs. What's it take to run a hockey team?
You just go to a bar
and see who's stupid enough to beat people up on ice?
Do you know how coordinated you have to be to skate and control a puck with a stick?
- No, because I'm cool and popular. - You all think you're better than us.
My family could whip your family in any sport, even basketball.
- You want to bet? - Yeah.
Gordons vs. McShays in a game of hoops. We win. You sign a new lease.
What? That's insane. Why would I agree to that?
Because if you win, I'll let you out of your contract early.
- Isla. - Whoa. Hold on.
Otherwise, you will be tied up in court for years, buried in legal fees.
It's your chance, Luke, to prove that you're better than us once and for all.
We win. We're out. 100%?
- 100%. - Fine.
It'll be an easy W.
Mr. Gordon, it's been 12 minutes.
I just need urine.
- Ready? One, go. Jump. - You can't do a count of one.
Do it on two, then. One, two. God, you're…
I'm not afraid to come in there. I have seen everything.
Jump. It's not that high.
All right, I'm coming in.
The children are four and two.
We cannot put them on a diet, Grandma.
Jackie? What happened?
Here you go.
It's nice and hot for you.
So the McShays have agreed to a new lease…
- Really? - Way to go, sis.
She didn't finish.
…if we, as a family, beat them in a five-on-five basketball game.
- Jesus Christ. - What?
Are you out of your mind? Have you seen Sandy play?
Luke was gonna walk,
and there's no other hockey team in LA to replace them.
Okay, let's think this through.
All right, Ness can obviously play. I'm pretty decent.
Isla, you're good when you're not bloated.
- True. - I think Jackie's out.
- Wait, where is Jackie? - He's at the urgent care.
He is?
He said he opened the bathroom window to look at a bird and fell out.
- What? - We have to get mesh up there.
We all love birds, but we love brothers more.
So are we just gonna play four-on-five? The McShays are gonna kill us.
What if we say that Marcus is our stepbrother?
I mean, Dad did love Black women.
I've already thought of that. No, it has to be a blood relative.
Well, that leaves us only one option.
Is there anyone else?
Ugh.
Bennie, thank you so much for coming on such short notice.
No problem, cuz.
It's a very short trip from the hot V.
Bennie, how you been, man?
Just got a new startup going. Taking up all my time.
- Tech? - Skittles.
You know the M&M store? I'm doing it, but with Skittles.
Oh my God!
- Jesus Christ! - Oh.
Don't eat it! It's my fucking seed money, man!
Bennie, we need you to help us
in a five-on-five basketball game against the McShays.
Mm-hmm.
That's why I came here from the sleazy-Veezy?
- Yeah. - I thought you maybe wanted to,
I don't know, reconnect with your cousin,
but you just wanna use my body and my athleticism.
Whoa, Bennie! Bennie, Bennie, Bennie. We love you, man.
I love you too, Ness, okay? But I'm a busy person.
I am a named defendant
in a lawsuit brought against me by the Mars Corporation.
- I'm trying to get… - All right, we will give you $500.
I'm in. That's all you had to say.
It's good to see you guys, man.
Hey, uh, Cam is waiting on the court, and he has a surprise.
- It's typical street rules. - Not street rules. We're not in a street.
What?
Thought if we were gonna win, we're gonna need a real coach.
Look, this isn't, uh, something I saw myself doing, but I do owe you guys.
And also, fuck the McShays.
Let's do it. Come on.
- Whoo! - Thank God you're here.
- What's up, my man? - What's up?
Hey, where do you get your clothes? They can't dress me in Vegas.
I gotta order all my shit from Slovenia,
and the exchange rate and the VAT is fucking killing me.
- Bennie. - I'd love to…
- I'll go warm up. I'll go warm up. - Yeah.
- Hey. - Good to see you back on the Waves court.
- I look good here, don't I? - Oh, everybody does. It's the lighting.
Hey, we gonna play ball,
or you gonna stand around and flirt all day?
- That is not… - What? No.
Look, I've seen you guys play basketball. We got a lot of work to do.
Left hand. Left hand.
Good job. Switch it over to your right. Good job.
Left, right. Left, right.
Down here. Look at me, down here.
Left, left. Good job, guys. Bennie, get your ass down. Left.
With all due respect, a little lower, I'll shit right on this floor.
You got this, Sandy. Ok… Okay.
The basket, bud.
- Let's go. - Whoo!
- Shit. - Oh, that was me.
There we go. It's not bad.
You'll get there.
Cam with the hook.
Feet, feet. Move your feet, move your feet. Hands up, hands up.
BDB from Las Vegas.
Good job, Isla.
You gotta go around them, Cam.
You go…
Come on, come on. Run, run, run.
- I have a stitch. - Get up!
- Cam, if you don't get your ass up… - I have a cramp in my side.
All right, guys.
You, uh, get some rest, hydrate.
I don't know, maybe pray.
Tomorrow's gonna be a lot tougher than today. You got it.
Yeah.
- See you later. - Isla.
- Thank you for doing this, my guy. - No problem. It's good to see everybody.
How's Boston treating you?
I mean, it's hard to text with mittens on, but I can't complain.
LA misses you.
Something tells me you feel the same way.
Later, Cam.
See you later.
These guys are gonna get fucking killed.
So I'm gonna ask Jay to dinner tonight.
Ali, this has been a long time coming. We're finally single at the same time.
You're single.
Okay, I… I really didn't want to show you this.
He's dating Keke Palmer?
- Yeah. - She's so likable.
I know.
I'm sorry.
For what it's worth, he's looking more run-down since moving to Boston.
No, he isn't.
Yeah. Damn, he has no bad days.
Wha…?
Goddammit!
Yeah. Looks like you ran over a nail.
Oh, thank you. Anything else obvious you'd like to point out?
Looks like there's an old salad in the back of your car.
It's not that old. It's from a week ago.
- Do you need help with the tire? - I'm fine. I have AAA.
- Ah. - And it will be here in…
145 minutes.
Let me see if I have a spare. I'll be back.
- Hey, man, you're pulling my hair out. - You got a lot of it.
Yeah.
All right. What are we doing tonight, boys?
Getting down and dirty at Dave & Buster's. Got my Power Tap wristband.
Cool, cool. Count me in.
Yep. Yeah.
You never wanna go to Dave & Buster's, not even on my half-birthday.
What, I can't hang out with my bro and my cuz?
What's going on?
Are you sick?
- Oh, is it that mole? - No.
- I gotta say, you look bad. - Shut up. I'm healthier than both of you.
Look, Bennie, can you excuse us for a second, please?
All right, fine.
I gotta, uh, FaceTime my girlfriend's kids anyway.
- I'll see you in the car. - Yeah.
Look, I do not want to go home
because I, uh, am dating Tommy White.
What? Tommy?
Our Tommy White?
Yes, he's gay, Ness, okay? There are gay athletes.
I know, okay? I'm just in shock.
This is so unlike you.
I know. I love rules, and I'm currently breaking all of them.
No, Tommy White's a stallion,
and you're used to bagging fives and sixes.
Okay, well, Tommy is unbearable.
I think what's going on here is
that you've been eating dog food your whole life.
Now you're getting a little taste of some A5 Wagyu. All right?
Your tummy's a little upset, but that's okay. You'll adapt.
So what, I'm just supposed to get used to his bad personality?
I mean, you work at the same company. Just find something you got in common.
Wanna bring him to Dave & Buster's? We could use him on the Pop-a-Shot.
Maybe we'll win enough tickets to get the drone.
You know what? I'm going home.
You just want to make sure you keep all your lug nuts in a safe place
so you don't lose any.
Hey, are you even watching me?
- What? - Are you watching me?
- Are you watching this… this tire thing? - You'd love that, wouldn't you?
Pervert.
Oh my God.
Okay.
I'm done.
- Okay. - You're good to go.
- What are you waiting for? A Yelp review? - I mean, a thank you would be nice.
Right. Thank you.
- Hey, we're gonna kick your ass tomorrow. - You wish.
Oh God, I'm so happy you're back.
You waited up for me?
I spilled a Slurpee on my side of the bed, so you have to sleep on the couch tonight.
Why didn't you change the sheets?
Um, dude, I can't risk pulling a muscle putting on a fitted sheet.
Right.
Do you mind? The game's almost over.
No, no, no. It's fine. I like basketball too.
In fact, I could use a few pointers for tomorrow's game.
- Oh, yeah, what do you need help with? - Uh, shooting, dribbling, uh, traveling.
Or is it not traveling?
- No. - I can't…
Stand up. Let me see your form.
Come on.
- All right. Uh… - Yeah.
- It's just kind of a… - Yeah, just stand up normal.
- Yeah, yeah. - Okay, yeah.
It's not terrible. You just need to adjust a little.
- Come here. - Right.
Elbow in.
And then shoot.
Yeah, don't forget to follow through.
- Right. - Let me see one more of those.
Elbow in and then… and then follow through.
Yeah.
- You're gonna be great. - Thanks.
You know that?
I switched out your shorts for the game tomorrow.
You really can't pull off the Billie Eilish look.
I know. Why can't everyone just wear skinny jeans again?
That reply was way too fast.
Stop stalking Keke's man!
You need to clear your head. We can't afford to lose tomorrow.
Here I come
Shit.
Bring the pain.
Ow!
- Stop. - Sorry, sorry.
- Hey. - Hey.
This is yours.
Oh. No, I thought you could keep it.
Thanks, but I'll get my own.
Okay.
All right, I think it'd be good to get some ground rules out of the way.
I took the liberty of writing a few of them up.
Maybe you wanna check 'em out?
Sure.
"Choke on deez nuts."
- Took it and read it. - I didn't read it.
- You already choked… - I didn't choke on anybody's nuts.
Wait a second.
There's only four of you.
Anything else obvious you wanna point out?
Our brother got called up to the National Guard yesterday.
He's putting his life on the line for your freedom.
- Where is he stationed? - San Diego.
- Is he protecting Comic-Con? - Okay, let's play four-on-four.
No, we flew in our annoying cousin for this.
I took a bus, but I'm here now.
No, this works out perfectly. Four-on-four. Sandy, sit on the bench.
- Happy to. Thanks. - All right, let's do this.
You got this. Let's go, Ness.
Here we go, bitch. Here we go, baby.
What the fuck?
- It was a foul! - Oh my God.
It's my pinky.
- What was that? - Nothing.
- You all right? - I'm fine. I'm fine.
- Oh fuck! Gross. - That's not fine.
- Oh fuck! - It was an accident.
It was not an accident. You went like that.
Just walk it off.
Come on, Sandy. We got this. Come on.
- You got this. - Between him and the basket.
Come on, Bennie. All right, Bennie.
- Stay here. - I got it.
- Back door. - Go, go, go.
- Let's go! - Let's go, Gordons!
- Come on! - No, no!
Dammit!
Cam!
- Isla, what are you doing? - Oh. What kinda pass was that?
You were open. What were you looking at?
We suck.
Specifically you, Sandy.
You too, Bennie.
It's the altitude and the jet lag and… and the time difference.
You took a bus from Vegas.
You're the one who made this stupid bet, Isla.
Oh my God. It's not like you came up with a better plan.
- I said… - Hey, all right, enough. Enough, okay?
You guys are not gonna win if you are fighting each other.
Jay is right.
We need to fight them.
Literally and physically.
- No, that's not what I was… - I am talking dirty picks.
- Elbows to the face. - Yeah.
- Ball punching. - Yes.
We are gonna claw ourselves up from the dead.
- And we are gonna end up on top! - Yes!
Gordons on three.
- Yeah, baby! - One, two, three.
Gordons!
Bring it back in real quick. Bradzackis, three, two, one.
Bradzackis!
What is that?
- Who is that? - What's that mean?
- That's my last name. - Really?
All right, here we go.
Switch! Switch! Switch!
Yeah!
Bennie!
- That's a travel. - What're you doing?
- Hey, hey. - Come on.
- Oh! - There we go.
There we go.
Go. Get it, girl.
- Yes! - Oh!
- Sandy, go through. - Pick him up.
I got it!
Stay wide.
Here we go. Bennie, shuffle.
Cam, you gotta move!
Stay wide! Isla, stay wide! Back door, Cam.
Yeah, here we go.
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
Here we go.
Eight seconds to go. You're down one. Here's the plan.
Cam, set a screen for Bennie.
- Yeah. - Isla, get Bennie the ball.
Bennie, as soon as they double-team you, Sandy's gonna be wide open.
- No, Sandy? - Huh?
- Oh. Are you sure? - Hey, they will never see it coming.
Sandy, you got this.
Wow. Wow, this means so much.
I know this day has not gone how we thought it was gonna go,
but the fact that you believe in me, it reminds me of a dream I had as a kid.
- Shut up. We don't have time. - Okay.
Seriously, you just gotta hit the shot.
- Okay. - Hey, hey, hey.
- Gordons never lose. - Yes! Put 'em in.
- Bradzackis on three, two, one. - We're not doing that.
- Okay, let's just go. - Come on. Go, go, go, get out there.
All right, come on, guys.
You got it. All right, Isla, take your time.
Get open, Bennie. Get open. There you go.
Bennie, look up. Look up, Bennie. Bennie, look up.
Bennie, look up.
Get up! Get up!
Come on!
Go, Isla, go!
Go, go, go.
Shoot it!
Oh my God!
Oh my God! Oh my God!
In your face.
Oh my God.
Did you see that? My face made the assist.
Yeah.
Do you know what the ick is?
Yes.
It's so crazy.
Hey.
Me?
Guess whose rent is going way up next year.
Now I'm gonna feel this bony little elbow in the morning.
- Want me to hit the other side to even it? - Sure, if you let me buy you dinner first.
All right, sign the new lease. We'll see.
Can I just say that we were looking really bad there for a while.
Down big at the half, but then we came through.
Dad would be so proud of us.
- Hear, hear. - I love you all.
- Cheers. - Yeah, cheers.
Cheers.
Gotcha.
Gonna see you-know-who tonight?
No, he saw me play basketball and said he wants to see other people.
Oh.
That's okay, buddy.
At some point, a beautiful seven's gonna make you real happy.
Guys, are we hot-tubbing or what?
Hey, hey, hey, hey. Usain Bolt, where are you going?
Slow down.
Listen.
I wanna thank you so much for what you did the other day.
I really appreciate that.
I'm not gonna forget that, you know what I mean?
- Yeah. - I'm glad to see you up and running again.
Actually, my foot still hurts a lot.
Hey, look, if any of those doctors try and push that poison on you,
Vicodin, stuff like that, I want you to give it right to me.
I wanna throw that in the trash for you, understand?
Yeah.
All right.
Oh, I thought everyone left.
I was, um… not going to eat this.
So, you and Luke McShay, huh?
Maybe.
Probably.
- Haven't decided yet. Might marry him. - Wow, I didn't know it was like that.
What do you care? Aren't you dating someone?
What? Who?
Keke Palmer.
I saw you on your romantic dinner, hands touching.
Are you ser…?
Uh, Keke and I were shooting a Turkish Air commercial.
Wait? Is that why you gave me my ring back?
- Giving rings back is kinda my thing. - Uh-huh.
You can't be annoyed about Luke.
If you're single, why haven't you asked me out
or even called me?
Because you just got out of a long-term relationship.
All right, I didn't want to be the guy who just swooped in.
That sounds like an excuse.
Isla.
Look, the minute that I heard about you and Lev,
I don't know what that kiss meant to you, but I can't stop thinking about it.
Me too.
If I got a penny or a dime
Or any piece of mind
Oh.
Your love brought it
If I got a house Got a home
A little meat left on my bones
If I got it Ooh, baby, your love brought it
You're the sugar in my tea
You're everything to me
If I got it Ooh, baby, your love brought it
Yeah, yeah
- Oh my God. - Mmm!
Oh God. Bennie!
I was told we were gonna do a little skinny-tubbing.
- No. - Hey, is Ali still here?
Everyone's gone!
I just wanted to say
thank you for including me in the family thing, and I appreciate it.
- I love you. - Hey, Bennie.
Grab your phone and get the hell out of my house.
- My phone. Sorry, I put it down. - Oh my God.
- Get out of my house! - Are you still here?
- I'm out. I can take a hint. - Whose robe is that?
I get it. Goodbye.
Is this your whole family?
I'm not just smiling because I got laid.
Although last night did put those daydreams to shame.
But we beat the McShays,
the team's rested and ready for the playoffs,
and once again, to be clear, Jay and I did it.
What's going on?
Isla, um…
I'm sorry, but I decided to sell my shares to Al Fleischman.
What?
Pretty good, right?
And I also got two more board members to sell,
so, uh, I'm gonna own 40% of the team.
With my 12%, Al and I will control the board.
And we think it would be best
to reinstate Cam as president of the Waves.
Mother…
I understand that life is a gamble
Easily you can get played like a piano
The road gets rocky like Marciano
You think of giving up But you can't though
The vision that you watch Change the channel
Load your brain With some pragmatic ammo
Time to start trying to Change up your plan, yo
Make your life a thing of beauty Like a Van Gogh
As far as friends go You need a handful
All the negative ones you dismantle Come on
'Cause remember, y'all It takes two to tango
So don't let them try to Play you like a banjo
You keep trucking a Dodge Like a Durango
And stay away from those Flaky like Panko
Be a boss like Tony Soprano
With all the infinity stones Just like Thanos
Come on, come on, come on, come on
I do what I do And it's like that, yeah
I do what I do And they like that, uh-huh
I do what I do And it's like that, okay
I do what I do And they like that, like that
I do what I do And it's like that, uh-huh
I do what I do And they like that, yeah
I do what I do And it's like that, okay
You know the deal, it's like that Like that, uh-huh
I do what I do And they like that, yeah
I do what I do And it's like that, okay
You know the deal, it's like that Like that, like that