1 00:00:47,976 --> 00:00:50,226 They say it's spring 2 00:00:52,226 --> 00:00:56,101 This feeling light as a feather 3 00:00:56,185 --> 00:00:59,018 They say this thing 4 00:01:00,435 --> 00:01:03,935 This magic we share together 5 00:01:04,018 --> 00:01:07,476 Came with the weather too… 6 00:01:08,976 --> 00:01:11,268 Here are some things I love about New York, 7 00:01:12,101 --> 00:01:14,768 that week in spring when it's warm, but not hot, 8 00:01:14,893 --> 00:01:16,893 and the trees are just beginning to bloom, 9 00:01:17,310 --> 00:01:18,351 men in suits, 10 00:01:19,226 --> 00:01:21,685 three papers and 12 gossip columns, 11 00:01:22,101 --> 00:01:24,393 It's easy for me to say, "I love you, New York." 12 00:01:24,768 --> 00:01:28,018 It's not so easy to say, "I love you, Mr. Big." 13 00:01:29,393 --> 00:01:32,351 The first time I realized I actually loved Big, 14 00:01:32,518 --> 00:01:34,685 was over toast and coffee one morning. 15 00:01:35,226 --> 00:01:36,268 What? 16 00:01:38,310 --> 00:01:39,893 Huh? Oh. 17 00:01:40,351 --> 00:01:41,351 Thanks, honey. 18 00:01:46,643 --> 00:01:47,643 What? 19 00:01:47,810 --> 00:01:48,810 Nothing. 20 00:01:49,268 --> 00:01:51,226 The first time I actually felt like saying it 21 00:01:51,310 --> 00:01:53,351 was the night he took me to the ballet. 22 00:01:53,435 --> 00:01:54,601 And he hates the ballet. 23 00:01:55,268 --> 00:01:56,810 I don't wanna disappoint you. 24 00:01:57,393 --> 00:01:59,768 But I think a couple of those dancers had on wires. 25 00:02:01,143 --> 00:02:02,351 They were not on wires. 26 00:02:02,435 --> 00:02:05,310 Oh, yeah. On a couple of those big leaps, I saw the wires. 27 00:02:06,601 --> 00:02:07,685 You know what? 28 00:02:08,643 --> 00:02:09,643 What? 29 00:02:11,185 --> 00:02:13,726 I love… your hair like that. 30 00:02:14,601 --> 00:02:15,935 Cut it out. 31 00:02:19,851 --> 00:02:23,018 And then there was the time I never expected to say it. 32 00:02:24,435 --> 00:02:27,685 Last Friday night at approximately 7:20 p.m., 33 00:02:29,226 --> 00:02:30,935 Big was picking me up to take me out to dinner. 34 00:02:31,018 --> 00:02:32,310 Hey, hi. 35 00:02:32,768 --> 00:02:34,893 I just have to, um, change my shoes. 36 00:02:35,143 --> 00:02:36,601 Well, hurry up. We don't wanna be late. 37 00:02:36,685 --> 00:02:39,143 If we grab a cab on Madison, we can be there in five minutes. 38 00:02:46,226 --> 00:02:48,435 - Okay. Okay. - Here. 39 00:02:50,476 --> 00:02:51,643 Well, what's this for? 40 00:02:52,351 --> 00:02:54,310 Well, I just saw it and thought of you. 41 00:03:06,976 --> 00:03:09,226 It was just…wrong. 42 00:03:09,518 --> 00:03:10,851 It was wrong. 43 00:03:11,185 --> 00:03:12,893 I didn't know what to say except… 44 00:03:16,268 --> 00:03:17,435 I love you. 45 00:03:18,351 --> 00:03:20,935 You told Big, "I love you" because he gave you that? 46 00:03:21,018 --> 00:03:23,560 What did you think it was, a large diamond duck ring? 47 00:03:23,726 --> 00:03:26,393 I think my mother has one of these in the shape of a squirrel. 48 00:03:26,476 --> 00:03:29,643 Note, I did not say, "I love the purse." 49 00:03:29,726 --> 00:03:30,851 And then what did he say? 50 00:03:31,185 --> 00:03:35,726 Well, he just sort of reacted stunned for a moment and then he said… 51 00:03:35,810 --> 00:03:37,101 Well. 52 00:03:38,601 --> 00:03:42,018 You're welcome. I'll just wait for you outside. 53 00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:46,310 Well, maybe he thought you said, "I love it." 54 00:03:46,643 --> 00:03:49,643 No, it was a very deliberate and distinct "you." 55 00:03:50,060 --> 00:03:52,143 So, he just sort of pretended like you didn't say it? 56 00:03:52,226 --> 00:03:54,226 Yeah, sort of. But we both know I did. 57 00:03:54,810 --> 00:03:56,476 So, now I've laid down the gauntlet. 58 00:03:56,560 --> 00:03:58,060 He either has to say "I love you" back, 59 00:03:58,185 --> 00:04:00,101 or I guess, I'm gonna have to break up with him. 60 00:04:00,518 --> 00:04:01,935 Well, how long are you gonna give him? 61 00:04:02,143 --> 00:04:04,268 Well, I didn't put an expiration date on the sentiment, 62 00:04:04,393 --> 00:04:06,518 but I figure it's got the shelf life of a dairy product, 63 00:04:06,601 --> 00:04:08,101 it's gonna start to curdle in about a week. 64 00:04:08,226 --> 00:04:09,768 You know, it's so interesting. 65 00:04:09,893 --> 00:04:12,976 You can tell a man, "I hate you," you have the best sex of your life. 66 00:04:13,060 --> 00:04:16,810 But tell him, "I love you," you'll probably never see him again. 67 00:04:17,060 --> 00:04:19,268 Well, it's just very… It's very comforting right now. 68 00:04:19,518 --> 00:04:20,935 Wait a minute. Time out. 69 00:04:21,435 --> 00:04:24,101 Did you ever think that at this very moment, 70 00:04:24,185 --> 00:04:28,185 the man might be trying to find his own way to tell Carrie that he loves her? 71 00:04:28,893 --> 00:04:31,726 Listening to Miranda wax optimistic about love, 72 00:04:31,810 --> 00:04:34,851 was more disorienting than a heat wave in February. 73 00:04:35,101 --> 00:04:37,018 No. No. 74 00:04:37,101 --> 00:04:40,018 But, it seemed that Miranda, formally love's greatest skeptic, 75 00:04:40,226 --> 00:04:43,185 had recently experienced a romantic epiphany. 76 00:04:43,393 --> 00:04:45,685 Go, grab us a seat outside. I'll meet you out there. 77 00:04:46,060 --> 00:04:47,226 Will you let me pay this time? 78 00:04:47,351 --> 00:04:50,101 No, no, no. Your money's no good here. Grab us a bench. 79 00:04:51,476 --> 00:04:52,476 All right. 80 00:04:54,393 --> 00:04:55,643 - How much? - $5.90. 81 00:04:57,101 --> 00:04:59,643 She was dating a bartender who worshiped her. 82 00:04:59,768 --> 00:05:02,101 And Miranda was so crazy about him in return 83 00:05:02,268 --> 00:05:04,226 that she let him take her out to dinner. 84 00:05:04,310 --> 00:05:06,768 But only to places she knew he could afford. 85 00:05:06,851 --> 00:05:08,768 - Mm. - Best slices in the city. 86 00:05:08,851 --> 00:05:10,185 - Don't you think? - Mm. 87 00:05:12,101 --> 00:05:13,310 So. 88 00:05:13,643 --> 00:05:15,226 - Saturday. - Mm-hm. 89 00:05:15,310 --> 00:05:17,018 My firm is having its annual dinner thing. 90 00:05:17,143 --> 00:05:18,045 Mm-hm. 91 00:05:18,060 --> 00:05:21,351 And I was wondering if you think that maybe the bar 92 00:05:21,476 --> 00:05:23,018 could spare you for a night, you could be my date. 93 00:05:23,101 --> 00:05:25,018 I warn you, it's gonna be totally boring. 94 00:05:25,560 --> 00:05:27,310 It's not gonna be boring if I'm there with you. 95 00:05:34,226 --> 00:05:36,226 You probably should wear a suit. 96 00:05:38,768 --> 00:05:41,518 So it's gonna be a big fancy affair. 97 00:05:42,810 --> 00:05:45,435 - You do have a suit, right? - Sure I do. 98 00:05:45,560 --> 00:05:47,810 It's… It's really nice. It's gold. 99 00:05:49,310 --> 00:05:50,435 It's gold? 100 00:05:50,518 --> 00:05:53,143 Yeah, you know, corduroy. 101 00:05:56,726 --> 00:05:58,310 What's wrong with corduroy? 102 00:05:59,018 --> 00:06:02,185 I don't have enough time to tell you what's wrong with corduroy. 103 00:06:06,393 --> 00:06:09,851 For the first time, Steve took Miranda back to his place. 104 00:06:12,601 --> 00:06:15,435 So, this is your apartment. 105 00:06:15,518 --> 00:06:17,560 Yeah. You like? 106 00:06:18,768 --> 00:06:19,935 It's sweet. 107 00:06:20,560 --> 00:06:23,560 I modeled it after DeNiro's place in Taxi Driver. 108 00:06:25,726 --> 00:06:28,685 - I'm kidding. - Yeah. 109 00:06:29,810 --> 00:06:32,060 It's cheap and it's near the bar. 110 00:06:32,851 --> 00:06:34,726 And you never have to come here again. 111 00:06:48,893 --> 00:06:50,560 That evening, Miranda experienced 112 00:06:50,726 --> 00:06:52,726 her first pangs of yuppie guilt. 113 00:06:54,226 --> 00:06:57,226 A lot of wonderful artists worked as bartenders for years. 114 00:06:57,435 --> 00:06:59,726 It doesn't mean he won't make money someday. 115 00:06:59,810 --> 00:07:02,226 He's not an artist, slash, bartender. 116 00:07:02,310 --> 00:07:05,101 He's just happy being a bartender, period. 117 00:07:05,268 --> 00:07:07,726 No aspirations beyond shaking the cocktails 118 00:07:07,893 --> 00:07:09,268 and refilling the peanut bowls. 119 00:07:09,351 --> 00:07:10,518 How's he in bed? 120 00:07:11,893 --> 00:07:13,226 There are no words. 121 00:07:13,643 --> 00:07:15,685 Sounds like a dream relationship to me. 122 00:07:15,768 --> 00:07:18,560 Yeah. He can make you cum, and then make you a Cosmopolitan. 123 00:07:19,601 --> 00:07:22,476 Honestly! I don't know how you can get serious with a guy 124 00:07:22,560 --> 00:07:24,435 whose entire future is based on tips? 125 00:07:24,768 --> 00:07:26,060 Wait a minute. 126 00:07:26,268 --> 00:07:29,518 Rich men date not-so-rich women all the time. 127 00:07:29,935 --> 00:07:31,601 I mean, come on. Look at me and Big. 128 00:07:31,685 --> 00:07:34,351 It's not about money, it's about compatibility. 129 00:07:34,435 --> 00:07:37,018 Yeah, but it's normal for the guy to have more money. 130 00:07:37,101 --> 00:07:38,851 - Oh, God! - Oh, come on! 131 00:07:39,101 --> 00:07:42,101 I know lots of women who make more money than their husbands. 132 00:07:42,226 --> 00:07:43,685 You're all missing my point. 133 00:07:44,018 --> 00:07:45,601 None of this matters to me. 134 00:07:45,685 --> 00:07:47,476 I just don't want it to matter to him. 135 00:07:47,601 --> 00:07:50,851 It's like, when single men have a lot of money, it works to their advantage. 136 00:07:50,935 --> 00:07:54,560 But when a single woman has money, it's a problem you have to deal with. 137 00:07:54,768 --> 00:07:55,753 - It's ridiculous! - Mm-hm. 138 00:07:55,768 --> 00:07:58,268 I want to enjoy my success, not apologize for it. 139 00:07:58,351 --> 00:08:00,601 Bravo, honey. Bravo! 140 00:08:01,476 --> 00:08:04,643 But you're talking about more than a difference in income. 141 00:08:04,810 --> 00:08:07,810 You're talking about a difference in background and education. 142 00:08:07,893 --> 00:08:09,560 This guy is working class. 143 00:08:09,643 --> 00:08:11,060 "Working class"? 144 00:08:11,268 --> 00:08:12,810 - Yeah. - It's the Millennium, sweetie. 145 00:08:12,893 --> 00:08:15,018 We don't say things like "working class" anymore. 146 00:08:15,101 --> 00:08:18,393 But you're trying to pretend that we live in a classless society, 147 00:08:18,851 --> 00:08:19,851 and we don't. 148 00:08:24,726 --> 00:08:26,810 Okay, Marie-Antoinette, we get the picture. 149 00:08:27,810 --> 00:08:28,810 Thank you. 150 00:08:28,893 --> 00:08:30,310 You know, she's right. 151 00:08:30,476 --> 00:08:34,435 I'm dating a guy right now, and he's got an actual servant. 152 00:08:34,518 --> 00:08:35,810 - What? - Really? 153 00:08:35,893 --> 00:08:36,893 Yeah. 154 00:08:36,976 --> 00:08:39,893 It seems that Samantha was dating Harvey Terkel, 155 00:08:39,976 --> 00:08:43,435 a real estate investor who had just made a killing in the market 156 00:08:43,518 --> 00:08:47,518 turning Chelsea sweatshops into luxury co-ops for the upwardly trendy. 157 00:08:47,601 --> 00:08:49,560 - Sum is a fantastic cook. - Hm. 158 00:08:49,726 --> 00:08:51,685 You won't eat better Thai food in Bangkok. 159 00:08:52,101 --> 00:08:54,101 More noodle, Mr. Harvey? 160 00:08:54,851 --> 00:08:55,851 Yes, please. 161 00:08:57,643 --> 00:08:59,976 You like spicy like Mr. Harvey, miss? 162 00:09:00,101 --> 00:09:01,810 I love spicy. 163 00:09:02,018 --> 00:09:03,143 Enjoy. 164 00:09:05,185 --> 00:09:06,518 Isn't she the best? 165 00:09:06,851 --> 00:09:08,851 I tell you I could not live without her. 166 00:09:10,518 --> 00:09:14,268 I wondered, was New York really any different from New Delhi? 167 00:09:14,476 --> 00:09:17,435 Had our class system been replaced by a caste system? 168 00:09:17,810 --> 00:09:21,018 And if so, can we date outside our caste? 169 00:09:22,435 --> 00:09:25,643 That night, Big took me out for a romantic dinner. 170 00:09:25,726 --> 00:09:27,185 I could smell it coming, 171 00:09:27,268 --> 00:09:29,810 the way you can smell a thunderstorm right before it hits. 172 00:09:30,268 --> 00:09:32,851 A mere two days after I had said, "I love you," 173 00:09:33,143 --> 00:09:36,685 Big had found his own way to say "I love you" to me. 174 00:09:36,810 --> 00:09:38,060 You're gonna love this. 175 00:09:38,685 --> 00:09:41,226 It's from a small winery in the heart of Tuscany. 176 00:09:42,601 --> 00:09:45,810 Mm. Delicioso. 177 00:09:48,560 --> 00:09:50,976 I rented a villa there one summer with the ex. 178 00:09:51,685 --> 00:09:52,935 It was incredible. 179 00:09:56,101 --> 00:09:58,976 I've always wanted to go back with someone I actually liked. 180 00:10:03,018 --> 00:10:06,185 Listen, there's something I've been meaning to tell you ever since 181 00:10:06,268 --> 00:10:07,851 the night I gave you the purse. 182 00:10:10,518 --> 00:10:11,518 Yeah? 183 00:10:13,851 --> 00:10:15,643 You can take it back if you don't like it. 184 00:10:16,685 --> 00:10:19,018 That became the first night I wanted to tell Big, 185 00:10:19,893 --> 00:10:21,101 "I hate you." 186 00:10:25,768 --> 00:10:28,393 The next afternoon, Charlotte made the acquaintance 187 00:10:28,476 --> 00:10:30,351 of a member of the very highest caste. 188 00:10:30,685 --> 00:10:33,685 A caste that from coast to coast, rich and poor, 189 00:10:33,893 --> 00:10:36,476 everyone deferred to and honored without question. 190 00:10:37,393 --> 00:10:38,601 The movie star. 191 00:10:41,893 --> 00:10:42,893 Hi. 192 00:10:42,935 --> 00:10:45,476 I'm Charlotte York. I'm the director of the gallery. 193 00:10:45,935 --> 00:10:47,518 Wylie Ford. 194 00:10:47,976 --> 00:10:49,226 Yeah, I know. 195 00:10:51,226 --> 00:10:52,560 How much for this piece? 196 00:10:53,810 --> 00:10:55,851 The fire extinguisher? 197 00:10:57,768 --> 00:10:59,060 Oh. No, no, no. 198 00:10:59,476 --> 00:11:01,810 That's a real fire extinguisher. 199 00:11:01,893 --> 00:11:05,601 You know, like, for the gallery, in case there's a fire. 200 00:11:08,476 --> 00:11:09,851 I guess I'm a total idiot. 201 00:11:09,935 --> 00:11:12,768 Oh, no, no. It happens all the time. 202 00:11:13,893 --> 00:11:15,560 You can have it. Take it. 203 00:11:15,976 --> 00:11:18,393 You could say you got it here at the gallery and… 204 00:11:18,476 --> 00:11:22,351 people will probably think it's a Jeff Koons. 205 00:11:22,476 --> 00:11:25,226 You are adorable. 206 00:11:26,601 --> 00:11:29,393 Hey, what do you think about closing up for the rest of the afternoon? 207 00:11:34,518 --> 00:11:36,768 Man, Charlene, you are so hot. 208 00:11:37,018 --> 00:11:38,851 Can't wait to get you to bed. 209 00:11:39,935 --> 00:11:42,476 Charlotte. My name is Charlotte. 210 00:11:42,560 --> 00:11:45,101 Oh. I prefer Charlene. 211 00:11:45,185 --> 00:11:46,560 Okay. 212 00:11:50,851 --> 00:11:52,435 Man, this champagne is running through me. 213 00:11:52,518 --> 00:11:55,601 Yo, bud, pull over, I need to take a leak. 214 00:12:01,685 --> 00:12:03,143 All right. Sit tight, beautiful. 215 00:12:03,226 --> 00:12:04,268 Okay. 216 00:12:14,101 --> 00:12:15,101 Hello? 217 00:12:15,268 --> 00:12:17,060 You'll never believe where I am. 218 00:12:17,810 --> 00:12:21,185 I'm in the back of a limo about to go have sex with Wiley Ford. 219 00:12:21,268 --> 00:12:22,351 But where is he now? 220 00:12:22,435 --> 00:12:25,018 He's taking a leak out in the alley, isn't that cute? 221 00:12:25,560 --> 00:12:27,560 Yeah, it's adorable. Now, Charlotte, listen to me, 222 00:12:27,643 --> 00:12:29,393 get out of there immediately. 223 00:12:29,560 --> 00:12:31,560 All my rules just went right out the window. 224 00:12:31,976 --> 00:12:34,685 It's like, he wants me and I have to obey. 225 00:12:34,810 --> 00:12:37,643 Oh! He's zipping up. I gotta go. 226 00:12:40,726 --> 00:12:42,018 - Hey, hey. - Hey, hey. 227 00:12:44,226 --> 00:12:45,726 - Yeah. Come on. - Mm. 228 00:12:48,643 --> 00:12:51,393 While Charlotte began to enjoy the perks of celebrity, 229 00:12:51,685 --> 00:12:55,935 Samantha discovered that Harvey Terkel came with some nice perks of his own. 230 00:12:56,768 --> 00:12:59,185 Now you stay in bed as long as you want. 231 00:12:59,268 --> 00:13:00,935 And Sum will make you breakfast. 232 00:13:01,018 --> 00:13:02,893 Oh, that's really not necessary. 233 00:13:02,976 --> 00:13:05,935 What? No, no, no. Woah. Hey, please, she loves it. 234 00:13:06,685 --> 00:13:09,310 - Do you like fresh orange or grapefruit? - Hm? 235 00:13:09,935 --> 00:13:11,310 - Orange. - Orange. 236 00:13:11,435 --> 00:13:12,810 - Eggs? - Coddled. 237 00:13:12,893 --> 00:13:14,476 "Coddled." 238 00:13:14,726 --> 00:13:15,768 Coming right up. 239 00:13:19,601 --> 00:13:21,060 - I'll call you. - Mm-hm. 240 00:13:22,185 --> 00:13:24,393 While Samantha didn't believe in having servants, 241 00:13:24,768 --> 00:13:27,435 she realized she had no problem dating a man who did. 242 00:13:27,768 --> 00:13:31,268 She knew it might take some adjusting, but she could get used to this. 243 00:13:33,310 --> 00:13:34,976 Oh. Bye, Sum. 244 00:13:35,226 --> 00:13:36,643 Now, take good care of Samantha. 245 00:13:38,435 --> 00:13:40,643 Bye-bye, Mr. Harvey. 246 00:13:41,893 --> 00:13:42,893 Okay. 247 00:13:47,726 --> 00:13:50,393 Okay, lazy bones, out of bed. 248 00:13:50,768 --> 00:13:53,560 - Excuse me? - Up, up. Must wash sheets. 249 00:13:53,685 --> 00:13:56,893 Hey. Should I have my breakfast in the dining room or… 250 00:13:56,976 --> 00:14:00,101 Breakfast? I got no time to make breakfast. 251 00:14:00,226 --> 00:14:02,643 Got a lot of work to do around here. 252 00:14:06,476 --> 00:14:08,351 It was then that Samantha realized 253 00:14:08,435 --> 00:14:11,101 that Sum was not so servile, after all. 254 00:14:11,810 --> 00:14:15,685 That afternoon, during her lunch break, Miranda took Steve shopping. 255 00:14:15,768 --> 00:14:16,976 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 256 00:14:17,435 --> 00:14:18,518 What do you think? 257 00:14:18,893 --> 00:14:21,310 I think it's kind of frightening how good I look. 258 00:14:21,393 --> 00:14:22,810 It's a beautiful suit. 259 00:14:23,601 --> 00:14:25,018 I think we should take it. 260 00:14:25,810 --> 00:14:28,018 Could you do a cuff with a nice little break? 261 00:14:28,101 --> 00:14:30,976 - Will these be the shoes? - I think we should take the shoes. 262 00:14:31,685 --> 00:14:33,143 Don't you think we should take the shoes? 263 00:14:34,018 --> 00:14:35,851 I guess we're taking the shoes. 264 00:14:38,560 --> 00:14:40,101 Uh-huh, yeah! Just like that. 265 00:14:41,726 --> 00:14:44,393 Jesus! $1,800. 266 00:14:45,351 --> 00:14:47,185 I guess I better not spill anything. 267 00:14:49,351 --> 00:14:51,476 Don't worry. It's my treat. 268 00:14:52,351 --> 00:14:53,351 What? 269 00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:55,810 I invited you to this thing. I want to pay for the suit. 270 00:14:55,893 --> 00:14:58,185 No way, you're not buying me a suit. 271 00:15:04,351 --> 00:15:06,435 But I wanted to do this for you. 272 00:15:07,560 --> 00:15:09,726 Then I start to think of you like my mother 273 00:15:09,810 --> 00:15:12,018 and that can get a little weird for me. 274 00:15:12,976 --> 00:15:14,518 Sorry, sir, it was declined. 275 00:15:14,976 --> 00:15:17,643 - Would you like to try another one? - Why don't you try one of mine? 276 00:15:17,768 --> 00:15:19,726 No, no, no. All right, how about this? 277 00:15:20,226 --> 00:15:23,226 Let's try $800 on the card, I'll write you a check for $1,000 278 00:15:23,310 --> 00:15:24,643 and I'll give you the rest in cash. 279 00:15:24,810 --> 00:15:26,685 Steve, forget it. It's just too expensive. 280 00:15:27,060 --> 00:15:29,560 Would you just let me buy the fucking suit? 281 00:15:35,893 --> 00:15:38,851 That Saturday, Big took me to a cocktail party 282 00:15:38,935 --> 00:15:40,685 at the home of Serena Bush… 283 00:15:41,310 --> 00:15:42,726 Great purse, fabulous. 284 00:15:43,060 --> 00:15:45,393 Careful! White rugs. 285 00:15:46,268 --> 00:15:49,268 An Upper East Side hostess famous for her husband's money 286 00:15:49,351 --> 00:15:51,810 and a close personal friendship with Tina Brown. 287 00:15:51,935 --> 00:15:53,393 I used to know her ten years ago, 288 00:15:53,476 --> 00:15:55,310 when she was famous for her father's money 289 00:15:55,393 --> 00:15:57,768 and a close, personal friendship with her drug dealer. 290 00:15:58,268 --> 00:16:00,601 Oh, God, I hate Park Avenue. 291 00:16:01,060 --> 00:16:02,851 It's like being in a foreign country. 292 00:16:03,351 --> 00:16:05,393 Just think of me as your passport, baby. 293 00:16:05,935 --> 00:16:07,601 As we walked through the room 294 00:16:07,685 --> 00:16:11,726 of women clutching their bejeweled swan, kitten and asparagus purses, 295 00:16:12,101 --> 00:16:16,101 I realized, to my horror, that not only did Big not love me, 296 00:16:16,476 --> 00:16:19,560 he had absolutely no idea who I was. 297 00:16:19,810 --> 00:16:22,435 - Can I get you a drink? - Uh, yeah. Tanqueray and tonic. 298 00:16:22,518 --> 00:16:23,643 Carrie, a drink? 299 00:16:24,268 --> 00:16:25,643 Oh, um… 300 00:16:25,768 --> 00:16:27,393 Uh, red wine, please. 301 00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:30,810 I'm sorry, Ms. Bush doesn't serve any brown food or drink. 302 00:16:31,810 --> 00:16:33,101 Can I get you something clear? 303 00:16:35,643 --> 00:16:37,476 Uh, yeah. Uh… 304 00:16:37,560 --> 00:16:38,685 Vodka on the rocks. 305 00:16:41,018 --> 00:16:42,893 No brown food? 306 00:16:43,143 --> 00:16:47,018 I think we've just encountered a mutant strain of Upper East Side anal. 307 00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:50,601 She's a little strange. I've known her for years, she's okay. 308 00:16:50,685 --> 00:16:53,351 Oh, yeah. I'm sure she's fabulous until you spill something. 309 00:16:53,435 --> 00:16:56,185 It's like she's consciously trying to cultivate an eccentricity, 310 00:16:56,268 --> 00:16:59,310 so people won't notice that she's completely devoid of personality. 311 00:17:00,310 --> 00:17:01,393 Well, don't be a bitch. 312 00:17:01,476 --> 00:17:03,268 I'm not being a bitch, I'm just being myself. 313 00:17:03,351 --> 00:17:04,935 You're being a little bit of a bitch. 314 00:17:05,018 --> 00:17:06,185 Sweetheart! 315 00:17:06,518 --> 00:17:09,560 - Hey! - How are you? It's been forever. 316 00:17:11,643 --> 00:17:12,893 Thank you for having us. 317 00:17:13,351 --> 00:17:15,143 Serena, you know Carrie. 318 00:17:15,435 --> 00:17:17,101 - Yes. - Hey. 319 00:17:18,310 --> 00:17:21,101 Uh, darling, can't smoke in here. 320 00:17:21,560 --> 00:17:23,726 No, no. Uh, terrace. 321 00:17:24,435 --> 00:17:25,935 Then that's where I'll be. 322 00:17:27,476 --> 00:17:31,268 And just like that, I was cast out of the fancy party. 323 00:17:32,476 --> 00:17:34,351 That same evening, Charlotte found herself 324 00:17:34,435 --> 00:17:36,893 the newest member of Wiley Ford's entourage. 325 00:17:37,518 --> 00:17:40,601 When did marijuana become legal in restaurants? 326 00:17:42,310 --> 00:17:43,253 It didn't. 327 00:17:43,268 --> 00:17:45,560 - Here. All right. - Oh. Thank you. 328 00:17:46,726 --> 00:17:48,643 - Here. - Oh. No, thank you. 329 00:17:48,726 --> 00:17:50,393 I don't smoke pot. 330 00:17:55,268 --> 00:17:56,560 You do now. 331 00:18:08,851 --> 00:18:09,851 You know… 332 00:18:10,435 --> 00:18:12,976 Sum was very rude to me the other morning. 333 00:18:13,601 --> 00:18:15,601 She practically threw me out of bed. 334 00:18:17,935 --> 00:18:19,393 You must've misunderstood. 335 00:18:19,476 --> 00:18:21,935 Her English isn't really that good. 336 00:18:25,768 --> 00:18:27,560 More asparagus, miss? 337 00:18:27,976 --> 00:18:30,310 It was then Samantha realized, 338 00:18:30,810 --> 00:18:33,101 she wasn't so dim, that Sum. 339 00:18:34,226 --> 00:18:35,726 That night, I realized that relationships 340 00:18:35,810 --> 00:18:37,643 had a caste system of their own. 341 00:18:37,893 --> 00:18:40,101 There's the person who says, "I love you." 342 00:18:40,185 --> 00:18:42,185 And there's the person who never responds. 343 00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:43,560 Carrie. 344 00:18:44,643 --> 00:18:47,268 Hey, Jeremiah? 345 00:18:47,810 --> 00:18:49,685 - What are you doing here? - Uh… 346 00:18:49,768 --> 00:18:51,310 Purveying the beverages. 347 00:18:52,185 --> 00:18:54,685 - Just snuck out here to smoke. - Ah! Good. 348 00:18:54,768 --> 00:18:57,060 Are you friends with these people? 349 00:18:57,143 --> 00:18:58,393 Oh, God, no. No. 350 00:18:58,518 --> 00:19:00,143 Yeah, a little uptight. 351 00:19:00,268 --> 00:19:02,976 - What's with the no brown food deal? - Whatever. 352 00:19:03,143 --> 00:19:06,143 Jeremiah was a famous downtown performance artist 353 00:19:06,226 --> 00:19:07,893 who was best known uptown as, 354 00:19:07,976 --> 00:19:09,518 "Hey, kid, let me have another scotch and soda." 355 00:19:09,976 --> 00:19:12,976 We had engaged in a mild flirtation for years. 356 00:19:13,060 --> 00:19:14,143 So, who're you here with? 357 00:19:14,351 --> 00:19:16,768 Oh. Some guy. 358 00:19:18,351 --> 00:19:20,518 Hey! I just got a new tattoo. You want to see it? 359 00:19:20,601 --> 00:19:22,060 - Yeah. Sure. - Yeah? 360 00:19:25,226 --> 00:19:27,101 - Is that real? - Yeah, it's real. 361 00:19:27,268 --> 00:19:28,518 - Wowzah. - Hm. 362 00:19:28,601 --> 00:19:30,185 How far down does that go? 363 00:19:32,226 --> 00:19:33,560 Pretty far. 364 00:19:33,976 --> 00:19:34,976 Check it out. 365 00:19:38,685 --> 00:19:39,685 Oh. 366 00:19:41,018 --> 00:19:43,018 Holy moly. 367 00:19:43,726 --> 00:19:44,810 - Shit. - Oh. 368 00:19:45,810 --> 00:19:46,893 Excuse me. 369 00:19:49,685 --> 00:19:50,810 Ah, shit. 370 00:20:08,726 --> 00:20:09,726 Uh… 371 00:20:10,810 --> 00:20:12,893 Were you really out there giving the caterer a blow job? 372 00:20:13,351 --> 00:20:15,018 First of all, he's not a caterer. 373 00:20:15,476 --> 00:20:17,601 He's a very well-known performance artist. 374 00:20:17,685 --> 00:20:18,685 Oh. 375 00:20:18,851 --> 00:20:20,518 Well, that didn't answer my question. 376 00:20:20,601 --> 00:20:22,060 Because it was offensive. 377 00:20:23,518 --> 00:20:26,476 Well, whatever you were doing, please stop. 378 00:20:27,268 --> 00:20:28,643 You're embarrassing me. 379 00:20:28,935 --> 00:20:30,310 I'm embarrassing you? 380 00:20:30,851 --> 00:20:33,518 Well, maybe if you'd joined me on the terrace like a gentleman, 381 00:20:33,643 --> 00:20:36,060 we wouldn't be standing here having this conversation. 382 00:20:36,310 --> 00:20:37,310 Let's just go. 383 00:20:37,601 --> 00:20:39,393 No, you go, I'm having a good time. 384 00:20:45,351 --> 00:20:48,518 And across town, Miranda was late for the firm dinner. 385 00:20:50,935 --> 00:20:51,935 Okay. 386 00:20:58,601 --> 00:20:59,810 Why are you dressed like that? 387 00:21:00,935 --> 00:21:02,143 I returned the suit. 388 00:21:03,435 --> 00:21:05,310 Frankly, I couldn't afford it. 389 00:21:06,435 --> 00:21:08,310 Then why didn't you let me pay for it? 390 00:21:09,018 --> 00:21:10,018 Miranda, 391 00:21:10,476 --> 00:21:13,018 you need to be with a guy who's more on your level. 392 00:21:14,268 --> 00:21:16,435 - Steve… - Being in that store with you… 393 00:21:18,060 --> 00:21:19,726 I didn't feel good about myself. 394 00:21:21,435 --> 00:21:23,810 Look, I think you're an incredible lady. 395 00:21:24,935 --> 00:21:27,018 You want to break up with me over a suit? 396 00:21:28,810 --> 00:21:30,310 Fuck the suit. 397 00:21:31,185 --> 00:21:32,768 It's not just the suit. 398 00:21:34,310 --> 00:21:36,351 There's always gonna be things out of my reach. 399 00:21:38,768 --> 00:21:40,560 So, I'm being punished for being successful. 400 00:21:42,810 --> 00:21:44,143 That's not how I mean it. 401 00:21:46,268 --> 00:21:47,268 Got it. 402 00:21:48,018 --> 00:21:49,018 Well. 403 00:21:49,935 --> 00:21:52,518 Thanks for the info and standing me up. 404 00:21:52,601 --> 00:21:54,143 And it's been nice knowing you. 405 00:21:55,726 --> 00:21:59,185 An hour later, adrift in a sea of Italian wool crepe, 406 00:21:59,726 --> 00:22:02,893 Miranda wondered what was really so wrong with corduroy anyway. 407 00:22:07,143 --> 00:22:10,810 In the space of one evening, Charlotte had gone from girlfriend, 408 00:22:11,518 --> 00:22:12,768 to groupie. 409 00:22:13,185 --> 00:22:14,476 Who had the rum and coke? 410 00:22:27,185 --> 00:22:28,810 Listen, Charlene. 411 00:22:29,726 --> 00:22:31,601 I want you to do something for me. 412 00:22:32,643 --> 00:22:35,018 I want you to go to the ladies' room, 413 00:22:35,101 --> 00:22:36,851 stick your finger in your pussy, 414 00:22:37,726 --> 00:22:40,185 come back and let me smell it. 415 00:22:48,935 --> 00:22:50,185 I don't think so. 416 00:22:54,768 --> 00:22:56,810 - Excuse me. - Charlene? 417 00:22:56,893 --> 00:22:59,101 Charlotte realized, another moment at the top, 418 00:22:59,185 --> 00:23:01,018 and she would have become an Untouchable. 419 00:23:03,185 --> 00:23:06,685 - Jeremiah was a bullfrog… - Ba, ba, bam 420 00:23:06,768 --> 00:23:10,310 - Was a good friend of mine - Ba, ba, bam 421 00:23:10,393 --> 00:23:13,560 I never understood a single word he said 422 00:23:13,768 --> 00:23:15,518 But I helped him drink… 423 00:23:15,601 --> 00:23:18,643 After Jeremiah got fired, we celebrated downtown 424 00:23:18,726 --> 00:23:20,560 with a couple of pitchers of Margaritas. 425 00:23:20,935 --> 00:23:23,268 joy to the world… 426 00:23:23,351 --> 00:23:24,253 Yeah! 427 00:23:24,268 --> 00:23:27,185 All the boys and girls! 428 00:23:27,935 --> 00:23:29,101 Joy to the… 429 00:23:36,851 --> 00:23:39,226 Joy to the fishes in the deep blue… 430 00:23:39,310 --> 00:23:40,810 I don't live here. Woah! 431 00:23:41,685 --> 00:23:42,685 Joy to you and me… 432 00:23:42,726 --> 00:23:44,601 That was the last thing I could remember that night. 433 00:23:44,685 --> 00:23:47,768 If I were the king of the world… 434 00:23:49,351 --> 00:23:51,435 Mm. 435 00:23:52,851 --> 00:23:54,643 - You just relax. - I will. 436 00:23:54,726 --> 00:23:57,226 - I'm gonna go grab a shower. - Mm-hm. 437 00:24:04,851 --> 00:24:06,018 Excuse me. 438 00:24:06,935 --> 00:24:08,060 Nasty. 439 00:24:08,768 --> 00:24:10,101 Nasty girl. 440 00:24:10,435 --> 00:24:13,351 You dirty cock-sucking whore. 441 00:24:14,476 --> 00:24:16,768 Must wash sheets right away. 442 00:24:17,268 --> 00:24:20,560 Stop it! Let go. You're crazy! 443 00:24:21,768 --> 00:24:23,185 What's going on out here? 444 00:24:24,518 --> 00:24:25,768 Mr. Harvey. 445 00:24:26,310 --> 00:24:27,768 I'm so sorry. 446 00:24:28,768 --> 00:24:33,101 I just tried to wash the sheets, but that lady hit me. 447 00:24:33,185 --> 00:24:34,893 Oh, come on! 448 00:24:35,018 --> 00:24:36,851 How dare you treat Sum that way. 449 00:24:36,935 --> 00:24:38,726 - Let me explain. - No! 450 00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:40,935 There's no explanation. 451 00:24:41,976 --> 00:24:43,143 Just get out of here. 452 00:24:44,601 --> 00:24:46,643 Samantha realized there was only room 453 00:24:46,726 --> 00:24:47,935 for one woman in Harvey's life. 454 00:24:48,018 --> 00:24:49,310 Sh, sh… 455 00:24:54,101 --> 00:24:55,226 Oh, Jesus. 456 00:24:58,768 --> 00:24:59,810 Hello? 457 00:25:00,185 --> 00:25:01,393 Listen. 458 00:25:01,810 --> 00:25:03,560 I know what you're really pissed off about. 459 00:25:04,560 --> 00:25:07,893 But it's just something I gotta do in my own time. 460 00:25:10,143 --> 00:25:11,143 Okay? 461 00:25:13,476 --> 00:25:15,518 Well, I fucking love you. 462 00:25:16,060 --> 00:25:17,310 All right? You know I do. 463 00:25:18,643 --> 00:25:20,268 - Hey, good morning. - But i-it… 464 00:25:20,351 --> 00:25:22,726 It's just a tough thing for me to say 465 00:25:23,726 --> 00:25:25,560 because it always seems to get me in trouble 466 00:25:26,726 --> 00:25:27,726 when I say it. 467 00:25:28,518 --> 00:25:29,518 Okay? 468 00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:31,560 Okay. 469 00:25:32,976 --> 00:25:34,226 Are we okay? 470 00:25:36,518 --> 00:25:37,560 We're great. 471 00:25:38,976 --> 00:25:40,435 Hey, I love you, too. 472 00:25:41,143 --> 00:25:42,601 I'll call you later, okay? 473 00:25:52,351 --> 00:25:53,351 Did we? 474 00:25:55,810 --> 00:25:57,101 Definitely not. 475 00:25:58,268 --> 00:25:59,351 I didn't think so. 476 00:26:06,643 --> 00:26:09,018 I felt like I was the lowest of the low. 477 00:26:09,560 --> 00:26:10,976 But I never told Mr. Big. 478 00:26:11,268 --> 00:26:14,518 I figured everything before "I love you," just doesn't count.