1 00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:52,191 I ran into my friend, Skipper, on the street the other day. 2 00:00:52,441 --> 00:00:55,858 He was bruised and frantic. He'd just broken up with another girl. 3 00:00:55,941 --> 00:00:57,900 I mean, I thought everything was going fine. 4 00:00:57,983 --> 00:00:59,941 That's when they tiptoe up and clobber you. 5 00:01:00,025 --> 00:01:02,108 Well, what did she say she thought was wrong? 6 00:01:03,233 --> 00:01:05,566 Skipper, you're a very sweet guy. 7 00:01:06,150 --> 00:01:07,816 I mean, this isn't about anything you did. 8 00:01:07,900 --> 00:01:11,066 It's just that we're in very different places right now. 9 00:01:11,150 --> 00:01:13,108 We want different things from life. 10 00:01:13,858 --> 00:01:15,941 I feel like I need to spend more time alone. 11 00:01:16,025 --> 00:01:18,150 So, actually, we want the same thing. 12 00:01:18,233 --> 00:01:20,316 We both wanna spend more time with you. 13 00:01:20,733 --> 00:01:23,691 Three months before that, it was a dental hygienist named Tiffany. 14 00:01:23,816 --> 00:01:26,066 The timing is wrong, that's all. 15 00:01:26,525 --> 00:01:28,650 You're one of the nicest guys I've ever known. 16 00:01:28,983 --> 00:01:32,441 It's just that I feel like I've reached a time in my life 17 00:01:32,608 --> 00:01:34,483 when I need to focus on my career. 18 00:01:34,691 --> 00:01:36,691 And I don't wanna feel guilty about that. 19 00:01:36,816 --> 00:01:38,566 But I don't want you to give up your career. 20 00:01:38,650 --> 00:01:41,191 I know. I know. You've been great. 21 00:01:41,483 --> 00:01:44,691 You really deserve someone who will appreciate you. 22 00:01:45,233 --> 00:01:48,150 I just don't feel like I have anything to give at the moment. 23 00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:51,525 And last year, it was Miranda. 24 00:01:51,775 --> 00:01:54,441 I feel like I need to spend more time alone. 25 00:01:55,691 --> 00:01:59,691 I've just reached a point in my life where I need to focus on my career. 26 00:02:00,441 --> 00:02:03,066 I just don't think that I have anything to give at the moment. 27 00:02:04,025 --> 00:02:05,733 Skipper, what else can I say? 28 00:02:06,191 --> 00:02:08,233 I have such horrible luck with women. 29 00:02:08,650 --> 00:02:10,900 I totally should've seen this coming, but of course, I didn't. 30 00:02:11,316 --> 00:02:15,191 Because they wait for you to get relaxed and get comfortable 31 00:02:15,275 --> 00:02:18,191 before they bring the ice pick down right between your eyes. 32 00:02:18,275 --> 00:02:19,358 Not all women, 33 00:02:19,441 --> 00:02:21,816 just the types of women you seem to be attracted to. 34 00:02:21,900 --> 00:02:24,483 Yeah. Over and over and over again. 35 00:02:24,941 --> 00:02:27,525 Well, those ladies don't know what they're missing, 36 00:02:27,608 --> 00:02:29,150 and missing and missing. 37 00:02:29,316 --> 00:02:31,150 Skipper's pattern was clear to both of us. 38 00:02:31,441 --> 00:02:34,400 He was a sweet guy who was perpetually attracted to women 39 00:02:34,483 --> 00:02:35,691 who were looking for jerks. 40 00:02:36,316 --> 00:02:38,358 Later that night, on a date across town, 41 00:02:38,441 --> 00:02:40,691 Miranda was repeating a pattern of her own. 42 00:02:40,775 --> 00:02:44,108 She had been dating a lawyer she met when they got into a big fight in court. 43 00:02:44,400 --> 00:02:48,525 A frequent guest on MSNBC, Kevin was not just argumentative, 44 00:02:48,650 --> 00:02:50,275 he was an anger professional. 45 00:02:50,566 --> 00:02:52,650 You know, I think I gotta revise my opinion 46 00:02:52,733 --> 00:02:55,858 that you gotta be an idiot to want to go out to a movie these days. 47 00:02:55,941 --> 00:02:59,816 I mean, it was worth the $19, plus $10 in snacks and water, 48 00:02:59,900 --> 00:03:03,233 just to hear that bus driver behind us explaining filmmaking to his wife. 49 00:03:03,316 --> 00:03:05,483 He certainly had some wonderful insights to share. 50 00:03:05,566 --> 00:03:08,316 But at least, on the bright side, it was an interesting movie, right? 51 00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:10,233 Oh, yeah, right. It was a real Citizen Kane. 52 00:03:10,316 --> 00:03:12,608 Well, I thought the actor who played Carlo was kind of charming. 53 00:03:12,691 --> 00:03:16,066 That moron looked like he walked into work before the anesthesia 54 00:03:16,150 --> 00:03:17,358 wore off from his lobotomy. 55 00:03:17,441 --> 00:03:19,691 All right, all right, I'll just get us a cab, okay? 56 00:03:20,150 --> 00:03:21,150 Taxi! 57 00:03:21,233 --> 00:03:23,233 You gotta face uptown to get a cab around here. 58 00:03:23,816 --> 00:03:25,941 I've caught plenty of cabs this way. 59 00:03:26,025 --> 00:03:28,316 Yeah, in Never-Never land, where people constantly confuse 60 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:30,483 a complete lack of talent with charm. 61 00:03:32,191 --> 00:03:34,316 Come on, Gene Shalit, get in the damn cab. 62 00:03:35,441 --> 00:03:36,483 Come on. 63 00:03:38,191 --> 00:03:39,566 Get in, sore loser. 64 00:03:39,733 --> 00:03:41,191 Come on, in. 65 00:03:42,108 --> 00:03:43,983 - In, come on. - Jesus! 66 00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:47,858 Miranda hated how he ordered her around and told her what do, 67 00:03:48,233 --> 00:03:50,191 every place except one. 68 00:03:51,358 --> 00:03:52,650 Put your hands up over your head. 69 00:03:57,608 --> 00:03:58,691 Spread your legs. 70 00:04:10,108 --> 00:04:15,691 The weird thing is, when he tells me what to do in life, it drives me crazy. 71 00:04:15,775 --> 00:04:19,400 But when tells me what to do during sex, it really drives me crazy. 72 00:04:19,483 --> 00:04:20,733 - Oh. - It's totally hot! 73 00:04:21,316 --> 00:04:22,441 That looks like a good spot. 74 00:04:22,941 --> 00:04:24,525 Everybody, check for park poo. 75 00:04:24,775 --> 00:04:26,108 I mean, isn't that funny? 76 00:04:26,566 --> 00:04:29,441 That what I hate in life, I love in sex? 77 00:04:29,566 --> 00:04:33,275 So, how about if you limit your contact with him to just sex? 78 00:04:33,483 --> 00:04:35,733 Oh, that's a nice, healthy relationship. 79 00:04:36,025 --> 00:04:38,483 The thing is, I'm not ready yet, to throw in the towel. 80 00:04:38,566 --> 00:04:40,108 No, you're just ready to wrap it around his neck. 81 00:04:41,608 --> 00:04:45,108 He's going through a very stressful time waiting to make partner at his firm. 82 00:04:45,191 --> 00:04:48,108 When that finally works out, I think maybe he'll lighten up a bit. 83 00:04:48,275 --> 00:04:51,441 Or maybe you should face the fact that you're attracted to angry guys. 84 00:04:51,525 --> 00:04:54,108 - Deviled eggs? - Wait a second, hold the eggs! 85 00:04:54,191 --> 00:04:56,400 What about Skipper? He never got angry. 86 00:04:56,483 --> 00:04:58,233 Yeah. And you dumped him. Fits a pattern. 87 00:04:58,316 --> 00:04:59,566 I don't have a pattern. 88 00:04:59,650 --> 00:05:01,733 In math, randomness is considered a pattern. 89 00:05:01,816 --> 00:05:04,566 Yes, and I'm what they call a prime number. 90 00:05:05,066 --> 00:05:07,025 She's got a very obvious pattern, you know? 91 00:05:07,358 --> 00:05:09,608 I do? What? Tell me! 92 00:05:09,858 --> 00:05:12,775 You wait for a perfect guy to ask you on a perfect date… 93 00:05:12,858 --> 00:05:16,316 And when he does, you project this huge fantasy on him, 94 00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:18,608 setting up these enormous expectations… 95 00:05:18,691 --> 00:05:20,900 Which promptly blow up in your pretty little face. 96 00:05:20,983 --> 00:05:23,358 You put all your deviled eggs in one basket, so to speak. 97 00:05:23,775 --> 00:05:25,233 That's a horrible pattern. 98 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:27,525 Well, spread it around a little more. 99 00:05:27,608 --> 00:05:31,025 Date a few guys at once and then you won't feel so disappointed. 100 00:05:31,108 --> 00:05:34,650 - Are you asking Charlotte to juggle? - It's all about multi-tasking. 101 00:05:35,025 --> 00:05:38,316 None of us can afford to fall into this "one man at a time" pattern. 102 00:05:38,400 --> 00:05:40,941 I mean, look at how much time you wasted with Big. 103 00:05:41,150 --> 00:05:42,733 Yeah, but Big was an aberration. 104 00:05:42,816 --> 00:05:44,816 Next time I meet a handsome, wealthy, 105 00:05:44,941 --> 00:05:46,525 and emotionally unavailable 43-year-old man, 106 00:05:46,608 --> 00:05:47,816 I'll know what to expect. 107 00:05:47,900 --> 00:05:48,900 Will you? 108 00:05:48,983 --> 00:05:51,275 Or will you just make the same mistake all over again? 109 00:05:51,900 --> 00:05:52,900 I wondered, 110 00:05:52,983 --> 00:05:55,816 were we all just victims of conditioned responses? 111 00:05:56,191 --> 00:05:59,275 Doomed to repeat the same unconscious relationship patterns? 112 00:05:59,733 --> 00:06:02,191 Were we all, in fact, just dating 113 00:06:02,525 --> 00:06:04,983 the same person over and over again? 114 00:06:05,316 --> 00:06:08,150 Well, I guess I have dated quite a few artists. 115 00:06:08,275 --> 00:06:10,650 But I don't think they were all the same person. 116 00:06:10,900 --> 00:06:15,150 Okay, yes. They were all narcissists with commitment phobias 117 00:06:15,233 --> 00:06:16,691 and substance abuse issues. 118 00:06:16,775 --> 00:06:20,733 But, in my opinion, the painters were very different from the sculptors. 119 00:06:21,733 --> 00:06:24,358 Handsome waspy assholes who treat me like shit. 120 00:06:24,566 --> 00:06:26,816 I only date girls with Sony Playstations. 121 00:06:26,941 --> 00:06:28,150 Or breasts. 122 00:06:30,566 --> 00:06:32,525 That night, Samantha became acquainted 123 00:06:32,608 --> 00:06:34,025 with the new neighbors next door. 124 00:06:36,150 --> 00:06:38,191 Though she had never met them face to face, 125 00:06:38,275 --> 00:06:39,775 she already knew them intimately. 126 00:06:42,691 --> 00:06:45,900 The idea that someone else was having great sex and flaunting it 127 00:06:45,983 --> 00:06:47,316 was more than she could bear. 128 00:06:47,900 --> 00:06:50,441 So she decided, if you can't join 'em, 129 00:06:51,816 --> 00:06:52,816 beat it. 130 00:06:55,900 --> 00:06:58,441 It all fit Samantha's pattern to a T. 131 00:06:59,441 --> 00:07:02,900 Having a wall between her and the person she was having sex with. 132 00:07:04,400 --> 00:07:06,691 After a few weeks of not seeing Big, 133 00:07:06,775 --> 00:07:10,150 I was beginning to fall into some familiar patterns of my own. 134 00:07:10,358 --> 00:07:12,941 Staying out till 3:00 a.m. and sleeping till noon, 135 00:07:13,025 --> 00:07:15,483 ordering takeout from the same greasy Chinese, 136 00:07:15,650 --> 00:07:19,775 and calling old friends who would always be there for me when I was feeling… 137 00:07:20,316 --> 00:07:21,316 restless. 138 00:07:23,650 --> 00:07:24,941 McFadden. 139 00:07:25,066 --> 00:07:26,525 Hey John, it's Carrie. 140 00:07:26,816 --> 00:07:29,775 Carrie, hey, how are you? Long time. 141 00:07:29,900 --> 00:07:33,608 Yeah, I know. Listen, I thought if you weren't doing anything, 142 00:07:33,775 --> 00:07:35,941 you might want to meet for a drink after work. 143 00:07:36,191 --> 00:07:37,691 Yeah. Sure, that would be great. 144 00:07:37,775 --> 00:07:39,775 How about six-ish? 145 00:07:39,858 --> 00:07:41,358 I could be there about 6:30. 146 00:07:41,441 --> 00:07:42,608 Perfect, I'll see you then. 147 00:07:47,816 --> 00:07:49,858 That evening, at 6:30 sharp, 148 00:07:52,983 --> 00:07:55,858 - Hey! You, too. - Hey. Wow, it's great to see you. 149 00:07:55,941 --> 00:07:56,885 Wow. 150 00:07:56,900 --> 00:07:59,608 Come on in. I was just gonna open up a bottle of red. 151 00:07:59,691 --> 00:08:01,316 Oh, red, yeah, beautiful. 152 00:08:02,108 --> 00:08:05,233 I just… I gotta be somewhere by 8:30. 153 00:08:05,941 --> 00:08:07,775 Oh, that's okay. I've got dinner plans at 8:00. 154 00:08:07,858 --> 00:08:08,941 Okay. 155 00:08:20,358 --> 00:08:23,775 John was as dependable a pal as a gal could ever hope for. 156 00:08:25,150 --> 00:08:27,566 Fun, comfortable and easy to be with. 157 00:08:28,025 --> 00:08:30,275 The kind of guy who you could shed all inhibitions 158 00:08:30,358 --> 00:08:32,066 and really be yourself around. 159 00:08:32,275 --> 00:08:34,983 No muss… no fuss. 160 00:08:35,566 --> 00:08:36,816 Phew. 161 00:08:39,733 --> 00:08:41,483 So how's the… 162 00:08:42,316 --> 00:08:44,275 - going? - Great. 163 00:08:45,025 --> 00:08:46,025 It's great. 164 00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:48,358 - How's work with you? - Never dull. 165 00:08:49,066 --> 00:08:50,150 Never dull. 166 00:08:51,191 --> 00:08:53,775 How's your younger sister doing? 167 00:08:53,941 --> 00:08:54,941 Brother. 168 00:08:56,441 --> 00:09:00,025 The one that moved to Phoenix? 169 00:09:00,441 --> 00:09:02,358 - Tallahassee. Yeah. - Right. 170 00:09:03,650 --> 00:09:05,525 So how's he doing down there? 171 00:09:05,733 --> 00:09:07,816 - He's doing great, thanks for asking. - Sure. 172 00:09:12,858 --> 00:09:14,525 And then I realized it. 173 00:09:14,900 --> 00:09:19,191 I didn't have a relationship pattern, I had a between-relationship pattern. 174 00:09:19,566 --> 00:09:22,358 I always went back to John after every devastating, 175 00:09:22,441 --> 00:09:24,358 soul-shattering, gut-wrenching break up. 176 00:09:24,816 --> 00:09:27,150 He was sweet, handsome, uncomplicated. 177 00:09:27,358 --> 00:09:29,858 A real shot in the arm for my sexual self-esteem. 178 00:09:29,941 --> 00:09:31,358 Thanks for the call, gorgeous. 179 00:09:35,150 --> 00:09:36,983 Sure put a cherry on my sundae. 180 00:09:37,941 --> 00:09:40,525 Why had I been keeping him on the bench all these years? 181 00:09:40,983 --> 00:09:44,566 Did I really believe a relationship had to be difficult in order to work? 182 00:09:46,400 --> 00:09:47,483 Hey. 183 00:09:48,150 --> 00:09:49,691 Do you want to have dinner Friday night? 184 00:09:50,191 --> 00:09:51,191 Dinner? 185 00:09:51,316 --> 00:09:52,900 Uh, yeah. 186 00:09:53,441 --> 00:09:55,566 Sure. I should check my schedule, but I think I can make it. 187 00:09:55,816 --> 00:09:56,816 Great. 188 00:09:56,941 --> 00:09:58,358 You want to say, like… 189 00:09:58,691 --> 00:09:59,775 eight o' clock? 190 00:10:00,025 --> 00:10:01,233 How about 8:15? 191 00:10:01,441 --> 00:10:04,275 And just like that, I broke my pattern. 192 00:10:05,566 --> 00:10:08,358 Carrie, you can't date your fuck buddy. 193 00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:11,691 Say it a little louder. I don't think the old lady in the last row heard you. 194 00:10:11,775 --> 00:10:14,941 You're gonna take the only person in your life that's there purely for sex 195 00:10:15,025 --> 00:10:17,233 no strings attached, and turn him into a human being? 196 00:10:17,358 --> 00:10:18,358 Why? 197 00:10:18,816 --> 00:10:20,983 Excuse me, "fuck buddy"? 198 00:10:21,608 --> 00:10:23,275 What is a "fuck buddy"? 199 00:10:23,358 --> 00:10:25,650 Oh, come on. 200 00:10:26,650 --> 00:10:29,566 A fuck buddy is a guy you probably dated once or twice, 201 00:10:29,650 --> 00:10:30,816 and it didn't really go anywhere, 202 00:10:30,900 --> 00:10:33,733 but the sex is so great, you sort of keep him on call. 203 00:10:33,858 --> 00:10:35,233 Hm, he's like "dial-a-dick." 204 00:10:35,441 --> 00:10:40,566 You mean you just call this guy up when you're, you know, horny? 205 00:10:40,650 --> 00:10:41,941 - Mm-hm. - Yes. 206 00:10:42,025 --> 00:10:43,441 And he just comes right over? 207 00:10:43,525 --> 00:10:46,233 Well, he's not a slave, sweetheart. He does have a life. 208 00:10:46,358 --> 00:10:48,191 But you don't really have to know about it. 209 00:10:48,275 --> 00:10:51,650 And you're generally guaranteed delivery within Manhattan in six hours or less. 210 00:10:52,066 --> 00:10:53,650 And you guys all have one? 211 00:10:53,900 --> 00:10:57,400 Well, mine moved to Chicago but now we have phone sex. 212 00:10:57,525 --> 00:10:59,025 What's he doing in Chicago? 213 00:10:59,150 --> 00:11:01,066 I have absolutely no idea. 214 00:11:02,025 --> 00:11:04,316 A few moments later, emboldened by our conversation, 215 00:11:04,400 --> 00:11:06,858 and high from too many tantric headstands, 216 00:11:07,191 --> 00:11:10,150 Charlotte asked a man out for the first time. 217 00:11:10,233 --> 00:11:11,775 Man, that class was tough. 218 00:11:12,108 --> 00:11:13,983 I never sweated so much in my entire life. 219 00:11:15,858 --> 00:11:17,816 Would you like to go out to dinner Friday night? 220 00:11:19,025 --> 00:11:20,025 Sure. 221 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:25,400 I wondered, 222 00:11:25,608 --> 00:11:27,941 if Charlotte could break her pattern and start asking out 223 00:11:28,066 --> 00:11:31,358 every man in Manhattan, why couldn't I start having a deeper relationship 224 00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:33,191 with a man I have shallow sex with? 225 00:11:38,941 --> 00:11:40,483 Wow. 226 00:11:41,233 --> 00:11:43,150 You're all dressy. Yeah. 227 00:11:43,733 --> 00:11:45,358 Well, I guess. 228 00:11:46,483 --> 00:11:47,483 Thanks. 229 00:11:47,650 --> 00:11:50,608 The fact was, I wanted to tell him that he'd never actually seen me in clothes. 230 00:11:50,983 --> 00:11:53,150 Uh, so, do you want a glass of wine first, or… 231 00:11:53,233 --> 00:11:55,941 No, I'm fine, thanks. 232 00:11:59,108 --> 00:12:01,483 - Hey, wait, wait, wait. Wait. - Oh. 233 00:12:02,150 --> 00:12:04,566 - I made reservations. - Huh? 234 00:12:04,941 --> 00:12:07,108 - At a sushi restaurant. - Oh. 235 00:12:08,191 --> 00:12:10,816 Oh, cool. I see. 236 00:12:11,108 --> 00:12:13,233 No! I mean, God! 237 00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:15,775 I mean sushi. 238 00:12:16,525 --> 00:12:18,650 - Japanese food! - Oh! 239 00:12:18,733 --> 00:12:21,191 When you said dinner, you meant dinner. 240 00:12:21,316 --> 00:12:22,260 Yeah. 241 00:12:22,275 --> 00:12:24,191 Oh, no. It's just that, whenever we've had dinner, 242 00:12:24,316 --> 00:12:25,218 we've always, you know… 243 00:12:25,233 --> 00:12:26,358 Yeah, I know. I know. 244 00:12:27,941 --> 00:12:30,816 All right. I'm gonna… I'm just gonna get my purse. 245 00:12:31,483 --> 00:12:34,566 Like most first dates, we were off to an awkward start. 246 00:12:43,733 --> 00:12:49,566 Um, the yellow tail sashimi, two pieces of salmon sushi, 247 00:12:49,650 --> 00:12:51,941 and a spicy tuna hand roll. 248 00:12:52,025 --> 00:12:53,483 Oh, do you like eel? 249 00:12:53,691 --> 00:12:54,983 Uh, no way. 250 00:12:55,066 --> 00:12:58,275 I'll have the chicken teriyaki, well done. 251 00:12:58,483 --> 00:13:01,066 No, the sushi's so amazing here. 252 00:13:01,150 --> 00:13:02,150 No, I just… 253 00:13:02,191 --> 00:13:04,108 I can't deal with the raw stuff. Yeah, it just doesn't work. 254 00:13:04,191 --> 00:13:06,233 Well, why didn't you tell me? We could've gone someplace else. 255 00:13:06,316 --> 00:13:08,941 No, don't worry about it. If I'm hungry, I'll grab a burger after. 256 00:13:09,233 --> 00:13:10,233 Okay. 257 00:13:11,483 --> 00:13:13,900 Oh, hey, listen, before I forget, 258 00:13:14,983 --> 00:13:16,483 this is for you. 259 00:13:17,066 --> 00:13:19,566 Oh! Thanks. What is it? 260 00:13:19,650 --> 00:13:23,858 Forty minutes free long distance, continental U.S., no strings attached. 261 00:13:24,108 --> 00:13:26,650 It's to promote our new 7-7-3 service, see? 262 00:13:26,733 --> 00:13:29,858 Seven days, seven hours, $3 a day. 263 00:13:30,566 --> 00:13:31,858 Well. Thank you. 264 00:13:31,941 --> 00:13:33,066 So you, like… 265 00:13:33,150 --> 00:13:36,150 Think these gimmicks up? Sort of. I mean, officially, I sell time. 266 00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:39,358 But I get these incentive minutes which I can distribute at my own discretion. 267 00:13:39,566 --> 00:13:40,566 Oh. 268 00:13:40,816 --> 00:13:43,441 So, if I'm lucky, I might get a whole hour next time? 269 00:13:43,566 --> 00:13:44,941 I don't think so. But if you're 270 00:13:45,025 --> 00:13:46,775 currently an MCI customer and you switch, 271 00:13:46,858 --> 00:13:48,566 then you get two hours for free. Hm? 272 00:13:48,941 --> 00:13:50,150 I was kidding. 273 00:13:50,358 --> 00:13:52,233 Oh. Right, gotcha. 274 00:13:56,108 --> 00:13:59,150 So, maybe we should just order some sake? 275 00:13:59,566 --> 00:14:00,566 Oh, yeah, sure. 276 00:14:00,608 --> 00:14:02,275 Hey, sake to me! 277 00:14:05,858 --> 00:14:07,816 We went back to my place for a quickie. 278 00:14:09,233 --> 00:14:12,400 I needed to erase the stagnant memory of the past two hours. 279 00:14:12,733 --> 00:14:15,650 Was it really possible that someone so stimulating in bed 280 00:14:15,733 --> 00:14:17,441 could be so tedious in life? 281 00:14:28,941 --> 00:14:31,650 Meanwhile, Samantha was actually beginning to look forward 282 00:14:31,733 --> 00:14:33,358 to the company of her new neighbors. 283 00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:35,733 Every night, like clockwork, 284 00:14:35,816 --> 00:14:38,191 right after the end of the 11 o'clock news… 285 00:14:46,525 --> 00:14:49,483 Samantha relished her role as the invisible guest vocalist 286 00:14:49,566 --> 00:14:50,650 to an unseen band. 287 00:14:56,941 --> 00:14:59,316 Until one night, she wasn't so invisible. 288 00:15:17,608 --> 00:15:19,525 That Saturday, Miranda planned for us all 289 00:15:19,650 --> 00:15:21,316 to meet her latest fling for brunch. 290 00:15:21,608 --> 00:15:23,983 Apparently, he had flung himself elsewhere. 291 00:15:24,066 --> 00:15:25,900 He should be here any minute, really. 292 00:15:25,983 --> 00:15:28,108 Hey, don't worry about it. If it's just us, it's fine. 293 00:15:28,191 --> 00:15:30,316 It's not like we've got anywhere else to go. 294 00:15:30,566 --> 00:15:31,858 I do have a date tonight. 295 00:15:31,941 --> 00:15:33,733 - With whom? - That yoga guy. 296 00:15:34,025 --> 00:15:35,108 I asked him out. 297 00:15:35,275 --> 00:15:37,316 - Hm? - Wow, I'm impressed. 298 00:15:37,566 --> 00:15:40,775 You know, once I broke the ice with him, it was just like riding a bike. 299 00:15:41,233 --> 00:15:44,358 I have so many dates this week, that I just scheduled two in one night. 300 00:15:44,483 --> 00:15:46,733 - You double-booked? - Well, I had to. 301 00:15:46,816 --> 00:15:48,525 This one guy was going out of town for three weeks, 302 00:15:48,608 --> 00:15:50,066 and the other guy, I didn't wanna cancel. 303 00:15:50,150 --> 00:15:52,275 So, how do you conceive pulling this one off? 304 00:15:52,358 --> 00:15:55,400 Early dinner with bachelor one, late supper with bachelor two. 305 00:15:55,483 --> 00:15:58,191 My God, you're turning into a man. 306 00:15:58,275 --> 00:16:00,941 Apparently, Charlotte had done more than break a pattern. 307 00:16:01,025 --> 00:16:02,900 She had actually changed genders. 308 00:16:03,733 --> 00:16:06,566 I just don't know how I'm ever gonna eat two dinners in a row. 309 00:16:06,650 --> 00:16:09,608 And then, just like that, she was a woman again. 310 00:16:09,858 --> 00:16:10,858 Sorry, babe. 311 00:16:10,941 --> 00:16:14,650 The idiot who drove me here apparently passed his driving test in Bangladesh. 312 00:16:15,150 --> 00:16:17,900 I'm just happy to get off that fuckin' rickshaw in one piece. 313 00:16:17,983 --> 00:16:21,400 Kevin, this is Carrie, and Samantha and Charlotte. 314 00:16:21,483 --> 00:16:22,941 - This is Kevin. - Oh, it's nice to meet you. 315 00:16:23,025 --> 00:16:24,775 I have to go make a quick phone call, I'll be right back. 316 00:16:25,108 --> 00:16:26,733 Waitress! Draft beer here. 317 00:16:29,025 --> 00:16:30,150 He's cute. 318 00:16:30,233 --> 00:16:32,316 In a tightly wound sort of way. 319 00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:35,150 He's finding out on Tuesday whether he made partner. 320 00:16:35,316 --> 00:16:38,358 I'm keeping my fingers crossed that he'll unwind some after that. 321 00:16:43,358 --> 00:16:44,483 What are you doing? 322 00:16:44,733 --> 00:16:47,233 I just… I just don't want him going off on the waitress. 323 00:16:48,983 --> 00:16:51,650 That evening, Charlotte set out to break her pattern. 324 00:16:51,775 --> 00:16:53,941 A casual meal with Eric from yoga, 325 00:16:54,025 --> 00:16:57,275 where they discovered a mutual love for long drives up Maine coasts, 326 00:16:57,358 --> 00:16:59,316 and reruns of "Nanny and the Professor". 327 00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:01,650 - She was psychic, wasn't she? - Absolutely. 328 00:17:01,775 --> 00:17:04,275 No, but it was very subtle, very sophisticated. 329 00:17:04,358 --> 00:17:06,941 I don't even think that kids today would understand it. 330 00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:08,400 No. 331 00:17:08,566 --> 00:17:09,941 I'll tell you something, when I have kids, 332 00:17:10,191 --> 00:17:12,108 I'm gonna be a total Nazi with the remote. 333 00:17:12,191 --> 00:17:13,358 I want them to read. 334 00:17:13,441 --> 00:17:14,816 How many kids do you want to have? 335 00:17:15,233 --> 00:17:16,816 Two, one of each. 336 00:17:17,233 --> 00:17:18,441 Sounds perfect. 337 00:17:19,191 --> 00:17:21,275 Just as Charlotte began to swim in visions 338 00:17:21,358 --> 00:17:23,316 of family summers in Kennebunkport, 339 00:17:23,608 --> 00:17:25,775 she realized she was late for the second shift. 340 00:17:25,941 --> 00:17:26,941 Oh, my God. 341 00:17:28,025 --> 00:17:29,025 What's wrong? 342 00:17:31,650 --> 00:17:34,483 My throat is so sore. 343 00:17:35,108 --> 00:17:38,191 I've just been fighting this cold all week. 344 00:17:39,316 --> 00:17:40,608 Let me get the check. 345 00:17:40,900 --> 00:17:42,316 I'm so sorry. 346 00:17:42,900 --> 00:17:44,858 I had a really great time. 347 00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:47,400 Yeah. Me, too. 348 00:17:49,108 --> 00:17:51,525 While Charlotte was off to her next engagement, 349 00:17:51,816 --> 00:17:54,941 Samantha was imagining an engagement of her own. 350 00:18:02,608 --> 00:18:04,233 Excuse me, Jesus! 351 00:18:07,066 --> 00:18:08,900 Hi, I was just wondering, 352 00:18:09,066 --> 00:18:11,191 do you know who lives in that apartment right there? 353 00:18:12,108 --> 00:18:13,983 Yes, yes. 354 00:18:15,150 --> 00:18:16,275 Very nice. 355 00:18:16,941 --> 00:18:19,650 Musician. His wife, a dancer. 356 00:18:19,983 --> 00:18:23,275 Really? And are they… nice looking? 357 00:18:24,108 --> 00:18:26,733 Yes, very nice. 358 00:18:28,150 --> 00:18:29,150 Very good. 359 00:18:29,233 --> 00:18:31,108 Okay, then. Carry on. 360 00:18:35,275 --> 00:18:37,316 Later that night, Charlotte was returning 361 00:18:37,441 --> 00:18:41,150 from a second dinner of steamed mussels and fries with bachelor number two, 362 00:18:41,316 --> 00:18:43,066 an art loving commodities broker. 363 00:18:43,150 --> 00:18:45,233 - I had a really great time. - Me, too. 364 00:18:46,025 --> 00:18:47,010 - Yeah. - Oh. 365 00:18:47,025 --> 00:18:48,775 Excuse me. 366 00:18:49,775 --> 00:18:51,525 So, can I call you? 367 00:18:51,983 --> 00:18:54,066 - Definitely. - Okay. 368 00:19:01,775 --> 00:19:02,816 Charlotte? 369 00:19:03,900 --> 00:19:06,275 Eric, what are you doing here? 370 00:19:06,525 --> 00:19:08,316 I was just leaving you some chicken soup 371 00:19:08,900 --> 00:19:09,900 for your throat. 372 00:19:10,358 --> 00:19:11,566 But I see you've healed. 373 00:19:12,608 --> 00:19:13,816 Who is this guy? 374 00:19:13,900 --> 00:19:16,400 I'm the guy she had dinner with before you. 375 00:19:17,733 --> 00:19:18,983 You… You double-booked us? 376 00:19:19,066 --> 00:19:20,275 Hey, hey. Don't feel bad, bud. 377 00:19:20,358 --> 00:19:22,858 At least, you got the late shift. I mean, you get to take her upstairs. 378 00:19:22,941 --> 00:19:23,983 I don't think so. 379 00:19:24,525 --> 00:19:27,025 Hey, you know what? Enjoy the soup. 380 00:19:28,025 --> 00:19:29,191 Hey, you going uptown? 381 00:19:30,233 --> 00:19:32,275 - Yeah, West Side. - Wanna share a cab? 382 00:19:32,900 --> 00:19:33,900 Sure. 383 00:19:35,441 --> 00:19:37,941 From that moment on, Charlotte developed a new pattern. 384 00:19:38,150 --> 00:19:41,358 She made it a rule never to take advice from her friends again. 385 00:19:45,108 --> 00:19:46,691 Very late that night, 386 00:19:46,775 --> 00:19:50,650 Samantha decided to roll out the welcome mat for her new neighbors. 387 00:19:57,025 --> 00:19:59,858 The musician and the dancer turned out to be a middle-aged, 388 00:19:59,941 --> 00:20:01,441 Eastern European couple. 389 00:20:01,733 --> 00:20:04,400 He played in a polka band. She was a dancer… 390 00:20:04,691 --> 00:20:06,025 once upon a time. 391 00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:07,650 Samantha? 392 00:20:09,983 --> 00:20:11,816 Would you mind keeping it down? 393 00:20:12,566 --> 00:20:14,275 I'm trying to get some sleep. 394 00:20:16,941 --> 00:20:18,650 Samantha broke a pattern after all. 395 00:20:21,108 --> 00:20:23,650 She decided to move her bed to the opposite wall. 396 00:20:25,358 --> 00:20:28,191 Later that week, Kevin experienced a dream come true. 397 00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:31,400 He was made a full partner of the law firm where he worked. 398 00:20:31,733 --> 00:20:33,733 He took Miranda out to celebrate. 399 00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:36,400 A toast. 400 00:20:36,691 --> 00:20:39,233 - To a very happy occasion. - Oh, yeah. 401 00:20:39,316 --> 00:20:41,275 I'm falling all over myself with glee. 402 00:20:41,358 --> 00:20:43,816 Now I get to work 60 hours a week for pretty much the same salary. 403 00:20:43,900 --> 00:20:45,066 I'm walking on air. 404 00:20:45,150 --> 00:20:47,316 Can't we enjoy your success for one fucking second? 405 00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:49,941 You know, it just pisses me off you don't get how much pressure I'm under. 406 00:20:50,025 --> 00:20:52,191 You really do live in Never-Never land, don't you? 407 00:20:54,608 --> 00:20:55,608 By the way, 408 00:20:56,025 --> 00:20:58,191 if there's a difference between this $100 bottle of champagne 409 00:20:58,275 --> 00:20:59,525 and the crap they sell for 29 bucks, 410 00:20:59,608 --> 00:21:02,150 it takes a more delicate palate than mine to detect it. I don't know. 411 00:21:02,233 --> 00:21:05,316 Well, I like the champagne, and the bread is fabulous. 412 00:21:05,441 --> 00:21:08,025 Oh my God, look at those flowers. 413 00:21:08,233 --> 00:21:09,316 Don't piss me off. 414 00:21:13,233 --> 00:21:14,358 Where are you going? 415 00:21:14,816 --> 00:21:16,358 Back to Never-Never land. 416 00:21:16,441 --> 00:21:19,941 And by the way, never-never call me again. 417 00:21:20,108 --> 00:21:21,275 Have a nice day. 418 00:21:21,608 --> 00:21:22,650 What? 419 00:21:22,858 --> 00:21:26,233 Miranda broke her pattern in a way that she had never expected. 420 00:21:26,566 --> 00:21:29,858 The angry guy had turned her into a cock-eyed optimist. 421 00:21:30,441 --> 00:21:32,858 There could not have been a more perfect moment 422 00:21:32,941 --> 00:21:35,566 for her to run into Skipper for the first time since she dumped him. 423 00:21:35,650 --> 00:21:37,733 Hey, Skipper! 424 00:21:39,358 --> 00:21:40,441 Hey. Slow down a minute. 425 00:21:40,525 --> 00:21:42,608 Hey, you know what? Don't tell me what to do, okay? 426 00:21:43,316 --> 00:21:46,025 I just wanted to say hello. How've you been? 427 00:21:46,816 --> 00:21:47,941 How've I been? 428 00:21:48,150 --> 00:21:50,983 You know, you got a lot of nerve talking to me like nothing happened, 429 00:21:51,066 --> 00:21:53,525 ever since you tossed me out like bad milk. 430 00:21:53,608 --> 00:21:55,441 You know, I'll tell you how I've been. Friggin' wonderful, 431 00:21:55,525 --> 00:21:57,316 now that I've got you out of my system. 432 00:21:57,650 --> 00:21:59,650 Can't I just talk to you for a minute? 433 00:22:00,150 --> 00:22:02,191 Could I buy you a beer or something? 434 00:22:02,525 --> 00:22:04,816 Miranda had never seen him as angry as this before. 435 00:22:04,941 --> 00:22:07,233 Much to her horror, she was attracted. 436 00:22:07,441 --> 00:22:08,858 That's the thing about patterns. 437 00:22:09,191 --> 00:22:11,066 They don't just break because you tell them to. 438 00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:12,858 Have you been working out? 439 00:22:13,816 --> 00:22:17,358 And a few nights later, John and I went out for a movie. 440 00:22:17,650 --> 00:22:20,650 I refused to believe that a passionate sexual connection 441 00:22:20,733 --> 00:22:23,983 could not be translated into a meaningful friendship at the very least. 442 00:22:25,108 --> 00:22:26,441 So, did you like the movie? 443 00:22:26,608 --> 00:22:28,525 - Was it a comedy? - No. 444 00:22:28,608 --> 00:22:29,775 I didn't think so. 445 00:22:31,691 --> 00:22:34,150 Isn't this the most amazing block? 446 00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:36,941 All these brownstones are over 100 years old. 447 00:22:37,025 --> 00:22:38,650 You know, it's like being in the New York 448 00:22:38,733 --> 00:22:41,275 of Edith Wharton and Henry James. 449 00:22:43,191 --> 00:22:46,900 Sometimes, I can't believe how lucky I am to live right here. 450 00:22:51,650 --> 00:22:52,650 What? 451 00:22:53,441 --> 00:22:55,066 Your tits look really great in that thing. 452 00:22:55,275 --> 00:22:58,691 At that moment, I knew we only had two things in common. 453 00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:01,316 Listen, I'd invite you in, but… 454 00:23:01,400 --> 00:23:02,858 Oh, no, that's okay. 455 00:23:03,150 --> 00:23:04,900 I got to be up really early tomorrow. So… 456 00:23:05,858 --> 00:23:06,941 Okay. 457 00:23:13,316 --> 00:23:14,316 I'll call you. 458 00:23:14,691 --> 00:23:15,691 Goodnight. 459 00:23:18,775 --> 00:23:21,150 I knew it was the last time we'd ever see each other. 460 00:23:25,066 --> 00:23:26,191 And just like that, 461 00:23:26,275 --> 00:23:28,358 I was thrown right back into my old pattern, 462 00:23:29,233 --> 00:23:32,775 Greasy Chinese, sleeping till noon, 463 00:23:33,150 --> 00:23:35,233 and feeling restless.