1 00:00:49,138 --> 00:00:51,680 Despite the fact there are over 8 million people… 2 00:00:51,763 --> 00:00:53,263 …on the island of Manhattan… 3 00:00:53,346 --> 00:00:57,513 …there are times when you still feel shipwrecked and alone. 4 00:00:58,013 --> 00:01:00,471 Times when even the most resourceful survivor 5 00:01:00,555 --> 00:01:04,430 will feel the need to put a message in a bottle, or on an answering machine. 6 00:01:06,346 --> 00:01:08,596 Hey, this is Aidan. I'm not in. Leave a message. 7 00:01:18,263 --> 00:01:19,805 Ah, yes! 8 00:01:20,471 --> 00:01:22,638 Strong arms. 9 00:01:22,721 --> 00:01:24,096 Earth to heaven, yes. 10 00:01:24,180 --> 00:01:26,930 Remember, every movement has a meaning. 11 00:01:27,013 --> 00:01:28,846 I couldn't help but wonder what it meant 12 00:01:28,930 --> 00:01:30,930 that I wanted to talk to my ex-boyfriend again. 13 00:01:31,013 --> 00:01:33,513 I've been making faux calls to Aidan. 14 00:01:33,596 --> 00:01:36,305 - What? - "Faux." F-A-U-X, where you dial… 15 00:01:36,388 --> 00:01:38,805 …but you have no idea what to say if he actually answers. 16 00:01:38,888 --> 00:01:40,513 It's emotional Russian roulette. 17 00:01:40,596 --> 00:01:42,846 You mean, you call and you hang up? 18 00:01:42,930 --> 00:01:45,221 - Yeah, that's pretty much the drill. - Why would you do that? 19 00:01:45,305 --> 00:01:49,388 I don't know. I don't even know why I'm telling you. Don't tell anybody else. 20 00:01:51,846 --> 00:01:53,638 Carrie, tell them what you told me. 21 00:01:53,971 --> 00:01:56,180 That I'm not going to your African dance class ever again 22 00:01:56,263 --> 00:01:57,721 or that you can't keep a secret? 23 00:01:58,388 --> 00:01:59,763 Carrie's calling Aidan. 24 00:01:59,846 --> 00:02:02,471 - And hanging up. - Why are you calling him? 25 00:02:05,221 --> 00:02:06,930 I think I want him back. 26 00:02:08,888 --> 00:02:10,013 How do I do this? 27 00:02:10,638 --> 00:02:12,805 Well first, you have to be willing to accept the fact that 28 00:02:12,888 --> 00:02:14,638 after what happened, he might not want to hear it. 29 00:02:14,721 --> 00:02:16,680 I am willing to accept that fact. How do I do this? 30 00:02:16,763 --> 00:02:20,471 You don't. One word, honey. "Granola." So not you. 31 00:02:20,555 --> 00:02:22,930 Aidan's perfect. He stripped her floors. 32 00:02:23,013 --> 00:02:25,888 He just needs to get rid of the turquoise rings and the tummy. 33 00:02:25,971 --> 00:02:28,638 Oh, the tummy is gone! At that thing last week, he looked… 34 00:02:29,221 --> 00:02:30,596 …disturbingly good. 35 00:02:30,680 --> 00:02:33,305 - He's the new, improved Aidan. - Low-fat granola. 36 00:02:33,388 --> 00:02:35,805 Yeah, yeah, yeah. He looks good. 37 00:02:36,430 --> 00:02:38,805 That's not why I want him back, though. I just miss him. 38 00:02:39,180 --> 00:02:41,596 - Did you miss him before you saw him? - What about the turquoise? 39 00:02:41,680 --> 00:02:44,721 I miss him! I've missed him for months. 40 00:02:46,513 --> 00:02:50,013 Okay, you need a safe approach, in case he rejects you. 41 00:02:50,596 --> 00:02:53,263 - E-mail him. - No, I don't believe in e-mail. 42 00:02:53,346 --> 00:02:55,888 I'm old-fashioned gal, I prefer calling and hanging up. 43 00:02:55,971 --> 00:02:59,180 Oh, come on, honey! You gotta get online, if only for the porn. 44 00:02:59,263 --> 00:03:01,305 Yeah. Would you please stop sending me those? 45 00:03:01,388 --> 00:03:03,430 Come on, it's funny. 46 00:03:03,513 --> 00:03:07,013 No, I can't get e-mail just to write to Aidan, that's pathetic. 47 00:03:07,096 --> 00:03:09,180 It's not just e-mail, you can shop online. 48 00:03:09,263 --> 00:03:12,971 - No, shopping is my cardio. - Okay, I know what to do. 49 00:03:13,430 --> 00:03:15,430 Don't call, don't e-mail, 50 00:03:15,513 --> 00:03:17,971 just show up at his furniture store… 51 00:03:19,305 --> 00:03:20,346 …wearing these. 52 00:03:20,430 --> 00:03:22,805 - Ew! What are those? - Fake nipples. 53 00:03:22,888 --> 00:03:24,971 And why are we carrying them around? 54 00:03:25,055 --> 00:03:27,221 They were sent to me, some kind of promotional thing. 55 00:03:27,305 --> 00:03:30,388 Really? Is there a Nipple Council? Are nipples getting a bad rep? 56 00:03:30,471 --> 00:03:32,138 Nipples are huge right now. 57 00:03:32,930 --> 00:03:35,555 Open any magazine. It's not that cold. 58 00:03:35,638 --> 00:03:38,555 Those girls are either tweaking, or they're wearing these. 59 00:03:38,638 --> 00:03:40,471 Sam, put them in. I wanna see how they work. 60 00:03:40,555 --> 00:03:43,555 Samantha already leads with her breasts. It's not a very good experiment. 61 00:03:43,638 --> 00:03:45,096 Miranda, you try them. 62 00:03:45,180 --> 00:03:48,471 Oh, yeah! Now that, I'd like to see. 63 00:03:48,555 --> 00:03:51,888 I'm not certain, but I have a feeling my boobs were just insulted. 64 00:03:52,596 --> 00:03:54,180 - All right, cover me. - All right. 65 00:03:54,263 --> 00:03:56,096 - That's it. - Oh. 66 00:03:56,805 --> 00:03:59,180 That's obscene. Okay, walk. 67 00:04:03,055 --> 00:04:06,263 "We have secretly replaced Miranda's normal nipples with rubber ones. 68 00:04:06,346 --> 00:04:07,846 Let's see what happens." 69 00:04:13,680 --> 00:04:15,846 Okay, that's it, I want my nipples back. 70 00:04:16,305 --> 00:04:18,471 The next day, sans nipples, 71 00:04:18,555 --> 00:04:21,596 Miranda's cardio put my cardio to shame. 72 00:04:21,680 --> 00:04:23,763 She was training for the marathon. 73 00:04:23,846 --> 00:04:26,638 And running wasn't the only thing getting her heart rate going. 74 00:04:26,721 --> 00:04:28,471 You sure you're in the right group? 75 00:04:28,555 --> 00:04:30,596 Ten-minute mile, right? I was here last week. 76 00:04:30,680 --> 00:04:33,138 Yeah, I know. But the thing is… 77 00:04:33,221 --> 00:04:35,388 …we never get any cute guys in this group. 78 00:04:35,471 --> 00:04:37,596 All the cute guys are in the seven-minute mile group. 79 00:04:37,680 --> 00:04:40,263 So, I'm the cutest of the slow guys, is what you're saying? 80 00:04:41,471 --> 00:04:42,805 - Knee surgery. - Oh! 81 00:04:45,096 --> 00:04:47,013 Have you run the marathon before? 82 00:04:47,096 --> 00:04:48,763 - Past four years. - Wow. 83 00:04:48,846 --> 00:04:51,013 - What about you? - First time. 84 00:04:52,888 --> 00:04:56,138 - We should train during the week. - Are there runs during the week? 85 00:04:56,221 --> 00:04:58,721 I don't know. I meant just the two of us. 86 00:04:58,805 --> 00:05:01,471 Oh. Sure, that'd be great. 87 00:05:01,555 --> 00:05:05,263 Miranda was thrilled, but she still wasn't sure… 88 00:05:05,346 --> 00:05:08,263 …if he was interested in anything more than a running buddy. 89 00:05:08,346 --> 00:05:10,096 Stay in line. 90 00:05:10,180 --> 00:05:14,388 And uptown, Charlotte's marathon redecoration continued. 91 00:05:14,471 --> 00:05:17,388 I can't believe I ever questioned this wallpaper. 92 00:05:17,471 --> 00:05:19,055 I love this wallpaper. 93 00:05:20,096 --> 00:05:21,305 - And I love you. - Aw! 94 00:05:24,096 --> 00:05:27,971 Well, I guess we're done with this room. Time to move on to the study. 95 00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:33,221 There's one room in every marriage that forces the question: 96 00:05:33,555 --> 00:05:36,721 "How long do we want it to be just the two of us?" 97 00:05:37,138 --> 00:05:39,221 It's right off our bedroom, so… 98 00:05:40,513 --> 00:05:41,513 Well… 99 00:05:42,388 --> 00:05:46,346 - What do you want to do with this room? - It could be a good room for a… 100 00:05:47,263 --> 00:05:48,430 B… 101 00:05:48,513 --> 00:05:49,513 A… 102 00:05:50,180 --> 00:05:51,180 B-Y? 103 00:05:52,305 --> 00:05:54,763 I think we already have enough bathrooms. 104 00:05:57,471 --> 00:06:00,346 Trey and Charlotte were finally on the same page. 105 00:06:00,430 --> 00:06:02,680 And the page had a baby on it. 106 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:07,055 Meanwhile, Samantha went shopping, nipples blazing, 107 00:06:07,138 --> 00:06:11,013 and picked up a '94 cabernet and an '84 Harvard MBA. 108 00:06:11,096 --> 00:06:13,680 Believe me, this is nothing. It's a blip. 109 00:06:14,221 --> 00:06:17,138 No, we can't retract it, because that's what you said. 110 00:06:17,221 --> 00:06:20,888 Warren Dreyfous was a founder of the communications strategy firm, 111 00:06:20,971 --> 00:06:23,888 that made the Exxon oil spill an "incident"… 112 00:06:23,971 --> 00:06:25,638 …rather than a "debacle." 113 00:06:25,721 --> 00:06:27,596 Look, I gotta go. Yeah. 114 00:06:28,305 --> 00:06:30,930 Next time, talk to me before you talk to the press. 115 00:06:31,430 --> 00:06:32,596 All right, man. Bye. 116 00:06:33,305 --> 00:06:34,555 Sorry about that. 117 00:06:34,888 --> 00:06:37,888 About talking on the phone, or staring at my nipples? 118 00:06:38,513 --> 00:06:39,805 About talking on the phone. 119 00:06:48,971 --> 00:06:52,221 That night, I tried to compose my first e-mail. 120 00:06:52,305 --> 00:06:55,846 A witty, yet sexy, yet sensitive note to Aidan. 121 00:07:16,096 --> 00:07:19,971 And across town, Samantha was getting some male, as well. 122 00:07:25,888 --> 00:07:28,596 As a lover, Warren was fantastic. 123 00:07:28,680 --> 00:07:33,346 But as a communications strategist, he made one major mistake. 124 00:07:33,430 --> 00:07:37,471 Samantha, does your gina-wina want a little visit 125 00:07:37,555 --> 00:07:39,721 from my mister-mister? 126 00:07:43,763 --> 00:07:46,180 - No. - Ick! He didn't say that. 127 00:07:46,263 --> 00:07:49,888 It's not what he said, it's how he said it, in baby talk. 128 00:07:49,971 --> 00:07:53,346 Ugh, baby talk's the worst. How can they think it's sexy? 129 00:07:53,888 --> 00:07:57,763 It's like putting ketchup on prime rib. Stop, you're ruining it. 130 00:07:57,846 --> 00:08:00,513 I know, it's such a shame, because this guy is hot. 131 00:08:01,138 --> 00:08:03,763 I finally had to sit on his face to shut him up. 132 00:08:03,846 --> 00:08:06,471 You know, some men use baby talk to avoid intimacy. 133 00:08:06,555 --> 00:08:09,596 While others simply choose not to respond to your e-mail. 134 00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:13,138 - Aidan still hasn't written back? - Fourteen hours, but who's counting? 135 00:08:13,638 --> 00:08:15,680 Oh, my God! Oh! 136 00:08:16,805 --> 00:08:18,305 Isn't this adorable? 137 00:08:18,846 --> 00:08:21,555 Don't you think that maybe it's a wee bit small? 138 00:08:21,638 --> 00:08:23,055 Oh, you guys. 139 00:08:24,013 --> 00:08:25,888 Trey and I are trying to have a baby. 140 00:08:26,221 --> 00:08:27,471 Oh. 141 00:08:27,555 --> 00:08:28,971 Why? 142 00:08:29,055 --> 00:08:31,430 Don't you think that maybe you should wait awhile? 143 00:08:31,513 --> 00:08:33,430 - You guys just got back together. - I can't wait. 144 00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:35,513 I'm the oldest woman I know who doesn't have a baby. 145 00:08:36,971 --> 00:08:40,513 The oldest married woman who wants one. You know what I mean. 146 00:08:40,596 --> 00:08:42,930 Sweetie, if that's what you want, I'm very happy for you. 147 00:08:43,013 --> 00:08:44,346 - Thanks. - You're welcome. 148 00:08:44,805 --> 00:08:47,388 And I promise, I won't become one of those mothers 149 00:08:47,471 --> 00:08:50,430 - who can only talk about Diaper Genies. - Good. 150 00:08:52,096 --> 00:08:53,930 Oh! Look over here. 151 00:08:54,013 --> 00:08:56,471 - What the hell is a Diaper Genie? - I don't know. 152 00:08:57,055 --> 00:08:58,846 Someone you hire to change a kid's diaper? 153 00:08:58,930 --> 00:08:59,930 Huh. 154 00:09:00,513 --> 00:09:02,013 Charlotte. 155 00:09:02,721 --> 00:09:04,013 Hi, Tricia! 156 00:09:04,096 --> 00:09:06,388 Tricia Watson was one of those hip moms 157 00:09:06,471 --> 00:09:10,221 for whom Barneys would always be stores, not dinosaurs. 158 00:09:10,305 --> 00:09:13,596 Cliff told me you and Trey are back together. I'm so glad. 159 00:09:14,513 --> 00:09:15,846 This is Mary Elizabeth. 160 00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:19,180 - Hello, Mary Elizabeth. I'm Charlotte. - Pleased to meet you. 161 00:09:20,596 --> 00:09:23,930 - Trey and I are trying to get pregnant. - Oh, that's great. 162 00:09:24,763 --> 00:09:26,930 You and Cliff should come over for dinner this week. 163 00:09:27,013 --> 00:09:29,888 We just redecorated our dining room. We haven't even used it yet. 164 00:09:30,263 --> 00:09:33,846 I'd love to, but try finding a sitter for three kids under eight. 165 00:09:34,596 --> 00:09:37,430 I can't believe I'm 34 with three kids. 166 00:09:40,846 --> 00:09:44,180 I invited the Watsons over for dinner Tuesday. They're bringing their kids. 167 00:09:44,555 --> 00:09:45,680 All righty. 168 00:09:45,763 --> 00:09:51,138 Charlotte, 35 with no kids, decided it was time to get serious. 169 00:09:52,596 --> 00:09:56,138 The next day, I worked on a little piece I was calling: 170 00:09:56,221 --> 00:09:59,096 "Thirty-six hours, and still no response from Aidan." 171 00:10:00,180 --> 00:10:03,346 The Indians had to wait up to six months for a response. 172 00:10:03,430 --> 00:10:07,263 It took me six months to get the message that I wanted to be with Aidan. 173 00:10:07,346 --> 00:10:09,638 And now I couldn't wait another minute. 174 00:10:10,263 --> 00:10:12,555 Are all these improvements in communication… 175 00:10:12,638 --> 00:10:14,305 …really helping us communicate? 176 00:10:14,930 --> 00:10:16,013 In matters of love, 177 00:10:16,346 --> 00:10:19,055 do actions really speak louder than words? 178 00:10:19,930 --> 00:10:21,721 I decided to take action. 179 00:10:22,055 --> 00:10:24,471 And this time… he answered. 180 00:10:24,971 --> 00:10:27,680 - Hello. - Why won't you respond to my e-mail? 181 00:10:28,096 --> 00:10:29,555 - Who is this? - Oh. 182 00:10:29,930 --> 00:10:32,930 - It's Carrie, hi. - Hey. 183 00:10:33,013 --> 00:10:36,096 I was just asking if you ever got my e-mail. 184 00:10:36,805 --> 00:10:37,805 - "Shoegal." - What? 185 00:10:37,888 --> 00:10:39,888 That's my screen name. Shoegal. 186 00:10:39,971 --> 00:10:42,180 Oh yeah, yeah, I think I got it and deleted it. 187 00:10:42,263 --> 00:10:43,638 That's not very neighborly. 188 00:10:43,971 --> 00:10:47,263 I get so much damn junk mail, if I don't know an address. 189 00:10:47,346 --> 00:10:51,305 Oh, I have the opposite problem. I've received two e-mails total. 190 00:10:51,388 --> 00:10:53,971 One from Miranda, and one welcoming me to AOL. 191 00:10:54,555 --> 00:10:56,388 - What did it say? - Just, you know… 192 00:10:56,721 --> 00:11:00,930 …how to use the different features and stuff, and "welcome." 193 00:11:01,013 --> 00:11:03,471 - No, the one you… - Oh! 194 00:11:03,555 --> 00:11:04,638 Oh. The one I… 195 00:11:04,721 --> 00:11:06,888 The one to you. Oh. Um… 196 00:11:07,430 --> 00:11:10,638 It doesn't even matter. You know what I was thinking? 197 00:11:11,013 --> 00:11:14,430 I was thinking that you and Steve and Miranda and me could go out sometime. 198 00:11:14,763 --> 00:11:15,805 You know, just like as a… 199 00:11:17,221 --> 00:11:20,805 - you know, a fun group thing. - Yeah, yeah, sounds good. 200 00:11:21,138 --> 00:11:22,763 Okay, great, so I'll set it up? 201 00:11:22,846 --> 00:11:24,388 - Okay. - Okay. 202 00:11:24,471 --> 00:11:25,680 - Okay. - Okay. 203 00:11:26,680 --> 00:11:28,096 - Bye. - Bye. 204 00:11:34,430 --> 00:11:36,471 Meanwhile, Miranda's run led to: 205 00:11:36,555 --> 00:11:39,013 "Wanna come up for coffee?" which led to sex, 206 00:11:39,096 --> 00:11:43,138 which led her to believe that Marathon Man could be more than a running buddy. 207 00:11:45,513 --> 00:11:46,971 I'm all sweaty. 208 00:11:47,555 --> 00:11:49,138 You taste great. 209 00:12:11,930 --> 00:12:14,846 Hey Miranda, did you get my e-mail about our double whatever-it-is? 210 00:12:14,930 --> 00:12:16,305 Yes, and I'm ignoring it. 211 00:12:17,763 --> 00:12:19,305 So far, not impressed with the e-mail. 212 00:12:19,388 --> 00:12:20,805 Why would I go out with Steve? 213 00:12:20,888 --> 00:12:22,930 No, no, you're not going out with Steve. 214 00:12:23,013 --> 00:12:25,555 You're going as my airbag, in case there's an impact. 215 00:12:25,971 --> 00:12:28,013 And Steve's going as Aidan's air bag. 216 00:12:29,013 --> 00:12:30,388 Well, would you explain that to Steve? 217 00:12:30,471 --> 00:12:32,263 Because I don't want him to get the wrong impression. 218 00:12:32,346 --> 00:12:34,180 - I'm dating other people now. - Who? 219 00:12:34,263 --> 00:12:35,971 - Marathon Man? - Yes. 220 00:12:36,055 --> 00:12:39,513 - We slept together after our run. - Well, I guess he was interested. 221 00:12:39,596 --> 00:12:41,513 Did he live up to his nickname? 222 00:12:41,596 --> 00:12:43,596 It was good, except he kind of… 223 00:12:45,846 --> 00:12:46,846 …licked my butt. 224 00:12:48,513 --> 00:12:52,638 - Be specific. You mean the cheeks or… - It was more localized than that. 225 00:12:52,721 --> 00:12:53,846 Ah… 226 00:12:53,930 --> 00:12:58,055 Wait a minute, are we talking tuchis-lingus? 227 00:12:58,138 --> 00:12:59,263 I'm afraid so. 228 00:13:00,013 --> 00:13:04,055 And I thought it was weird. It's weird, right? I mean, are we doing this now? 229 00:13:04,138 --> 00:13:07,763 - If the guy is willing, why not? - Anyone other than Samantha? 230 00:13:08,346 --> 00:13:11,263 No, no, I never had a guy do the TL on me. Nope! 231 00:13:12,263 --> 00:13:14,013 Well actually no, one time, it almost happened, 232 00:13:14,096 --> 00:13:15,971 but I got the feeling he just lost his way. 233 00:13:17,846 --> 00:13:19,221 Well, Trey likes to do it. 234 00:13:21,555 --> 00:13:22,555 We're married. 235 00:13:23,055 --> 00:13:27,430 Okay, I'm definitely in the slow sexual group if even Charlotte is open to this. 236 00:13:27,513 --> 00:13:30,305 There's something happening with men and the ass. 237 00:13:30,388 --> 00:13:31,290 It's true. 238 00:13:31,305 --> 00:13:34,763 The last few guys I've been with have been much more eager to attend to it, 239 00:13:34,846 --> 00:13:36,055 you know, digitally. 240 00:13:36,471 --> 00:13:38,180 How did this happen? How did they get the message 241 00:13:38,263 --> 00:13:40,138 that the ass is now on the menu? 242 00:13:40,221 --> 00:13:43,846 I bet there's one loud-mouthed guy who found some woman who loved it 243 00:13:43,930 --> 00:13:46,263 and told everybody, "Women love this!" 244 00:13:46,346 --> 00:13:48,805 - Who is this guy? - Who's the woman who loved it? 245 00:13:48,888 --> 00:13:51,513 - Don't knock it until you try it. - Bingo. 246 00:13:51,596 --> 00:13:54,888 Maybe I shouldn't have pulled away so fast. Was this my last shot? 247 00:13:54,971 --> 00:13:57,221 Am I out of the ass loop forever? I mean… 248 00:13:57,305 --> 00:13:58,930 I can't bring myself to ask for it. 249 00:13:59,013 --> 00:14:01,513 You don't have to ask for it, just lean into it. 250 00:14:01,596 --> 00:14:04,305 No words necessary. He'll get the signal. 251 00:14:04,388 --> 00:14:07,180 But then…do I have to reciprocate? 252 00:14:07,721 --> 00:14:10,180 No. I would never do it back to them. 253 00:14:10,263 --> 00:14:11,971 - Neither would I. - Me neither. 254 00:14:12,346 --> 00:14:13,388 You wouldn't? 255 00:14:15,513 --> 00:14:19,430 That night, Charlotte performed a more traditional wifely duty. 256 00:14:19,971 --> 00:14:22,471 She cooked dinner for her husband and their guests. 257 00:14:22,805 --> 00:14:23,805 Go ahead, everyone. 258 00:14:26,388 --> 00:14:28,305 This looks amazing, Charlotte! 259 00:14:28,638 --> 00:14:29,971 Trish is amazed that anyone cooks. 260 00:14:30,346 --> 00:14:32,971 Well, Trish has three kids, which keeps her kind of busy. 261 00:14:33,055 --> 00:14:35,555 I don't want to sit next to the lady. 262 00:14:35,638 --> 00:14:37,513 - Martin, that's "one." - Hmmph! 263 00:14:38,305 --> 00:14:40,138 - How many does he get? - Forty-five. 264 00:14:40,596 --> 00:14:42,305 But I don't wanna. 265 00:14:42,388 --> 00:14:44,346 Martin! 266 00:14:44,430 --> 00:14:47,221 - We can rearrange, if you want. - No, it's fine. 267 00:14:49,388 --> 00:14:51,596 - Martin. Do you need your inhaler? - No. 268 00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:54,430 He's asthmatic. Not going to be much in the sports department. 269 00:14:54,513 --> 00:14:56,596 Not all little boys have to play sports. 270 00:14:56,680 --> 00:14:59,430 Don't talk to me like you talk to the kids. 271 00:14:59,513 --> 00:15:01,221 Martin, up here. 272 00:15:05,263 --> 00:15:07,930 - Fancy shoes there, Hank. - They used to be mine. 273 00:15:08,013 --> 00:15:09,430 And now he won't go out without 'em. 274 00:15:09,513 --> 00:15:11,055 Don't talk about him like that. 275 00:15:11,138 --> 00:15:12,721 Don't you talk to me like that. 276 00:15:14,471 --> 00:15:16,763 That night, Trey and Charlotte didn't have sex. 277 00:15:17,388 --> 00:15:19,846 And they didn't have sex the next night, either. 278 00:15:20,180 --> 00:15:23,221 This time, inaction was speaking louder than words. 279 00:15:24,055 --> 00:15:26,013 So, this guy from pest control comes over 280 00:15:26,096 --> 00:15:28,013 and sticks a few dead ones on a tape strip… 281 00:15:28,096 --> 00:15:30,221 I, on the other hand, was full of words. 282 00:15:30,305 --> 00:15:33,846 They're everywhere. So I say to him, "What are they?" 283 00:15:33,930 --> 00:15:37,555 He says, "Lady, I don't know, that's why I'm sending them in to the lab." 284 00:15:37,638 --> 00:15:40,763 And I'm thinking, "This is New York, this is the pest guy. 285 00:15:40,846 --> 00:15:43,430 And I got something. He doesn't know what it is… 286 00:15:43,513 --> 00:15:45,471 …and that ain't good!" 287 00:15:51,805 --> 00:15:53,763 I gotta take a leak, I'm laughing too hard. 288 00:15:53,846 --> 00:15:55,430 Man, I was gonna go. 289 00:15:55,888 --> 00:15:58,680 - And? - And we're men. We don't do that. 290 00:15:58,763 --> 00:16:00,305 Women can do that. Men can't. 291 00:16:00,388 --> 00:16:02,180 You should go. Break with convention. 292 00:16:02,971 --> 00:16:04,180 What the hell, I'm man enough. 293 00:16:04,888 --> 00:16:08,263 Do I get a say in this? We're already partners in the bar. 294 00:16:08,346 --> 00:16:10,680 - People are going to talk. - We're going to the bathroom. 295 00:16:12,763 --> 00:16:15,430 So apparently Aidan needed an airbag in the bathroom. 296 00:16:15,513 --> 00:16:17,013 You know what? I think I'm okay. 297 00:16:17,096 --> 00:16:19,513 - You mean, you think you're over him. - No, I think you can go. 298 00:16:20,805 --> 00:16:22,305 I don't even get flan? 299 00:16:22,388 --> 00:16:24,513 The thing is, if you don't leave now… 300 00:16:24,596 --> 00:16:27,221 then we're gonna have to end the night together, you know, 301 00:16:27,305 --> 00:16:29,721 we have to hug and share cabs according to neighborhood. 302 00:16:29,805 --> 00:16:32,221 And then I won't have any time alone with him. 303 00:16:32,305 --> 00:16:34,763 Yeah… yeah, okay. 304 00:16:34,846 --> 00:16:37,221 Okay. And can you take Steve with you? 305 00:16:45,180 --> 00:16:47,430 - Thank you for walking me home. - Oh. 306 00:16:47,930 --> 00:16:51,388 You live four blocks from the restaurant. It's the least I could do. 307 00:16:54,388 --> 00:16:55,471 Good to see you tonight. 308 00:16:56,430 --> 00:16:58,096 I think I want to get back together. 309 00:16:58,180 --> 00:16:59,430 Oh, fuck, I… 310 00:17:01,346 --> 00:17:04,055 …was afraid you were going to say something like that. 311 00:17:06,680 --> 00:17:09,471 I was willing to try the friendship thing, but I can't… 312 00:17:09,930 --> 00:17:11,513 do the relationship thing. 313 00:17:12,930 --> 00:17:16,221 But… you… 314 00:17:17,346 --> 00:17:20,471 You put your hand on my hand. 315 00:17:21,763 --> 00:17:24,471 - What? - At the restaurant, you… 316 00:17:24,930 --> 00:17:27,638 Oh. I was trying to make you comfortable. 317 00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:31,180 You seemed so nervous telling that bug story. 318 00:17:32,471 --> 00:17:33,471 Oh. 319 00:17:37,471 --> 00:17:39,180 Oh, well… like 320 00:17:40,138 --> 00:17:41,763 then I guess I should… 321 00:17:47,013 --> 00:17:48,346 Good night. 322 00:17:58,721 --> 00:17:59,721 Good night. 323 00:18:01,263 --> 00:18:04,513 Miranda didn't answer her phone so I left a desperate message 324 00:18:04,596 --> 00:18:06,638 and started to send her a desperate e-mail. 325 00:18:11,471 --> 00:18:12,638 - Hello? - Hey. 326 00:18:12,721 --> 00:18:16,305 I was just about to call you. I was IM-ing Marathon Man. 327 00:18:16,388 --> 00:18:19,221 Interesting. Will your tuchis be wanting some lingus? 328 00:18:19,305 --> 00:18:21,888 Uh, listen, if things work out between him and me… 329 00:18:21,971 --> 00:18:24,846 we never had that conversation. He's coming over. 330 00:18:24,930 --> 00:18:28,180 Well, I guess you'll be having dessert after all. 331 00:18:28,596 --> 00:18:32,430 What happened to my airbag outside the restaurant? Steve tried to kiss me. 332 00:18:32,513 --> 00:18:33,596 Aidan kissed me. 333 00:18:33,680 --> 00:18:35,346 Although, we kinda miskissed. 334 00:18:35,430 --> 00:18:37,971 And I wasn't gonna kiss him at all, coz he said he just wanted to be friends. 335 00:18:38,055 --> 00:18:40,305 But then he kissed me. What does that mean? 336 00:18:41,930 --> 00:18:44,721 Oh, my God, he's online. Can he see me? 337 00:18:44,805 --> 00:18:46,846 No, just step away from the computer. 338 00:18:46,930 --> 00:18:49,096 - No, I'm going to go back there. - Where? To Aidan's? 339 00:18:49,180 --> 00:18:50,471 I know he's home. 340 00:18:50,555 --> 00:18:52,763 Carrie, pace yourself, send him an e-mail or something. 341 00:18:53,180 --> 00:18:57,346 No, because then he'll just say that he doesn't wanna see me but I know he does. 342 00:18:58,180 --> 00:18:59,930 His words said "no," but his kiss said "yes." 343 00:19:00,013 --> 00:19:02,346 That's the defense invoked by date rapists. 344 00:19:03,138 --> 00:19:04,513 I know he still feels it. 345 00:19:06,513 --> 00:19:11,055 When men attempt bold gestures, it's generally considered romantic. 346 00:19:17,888 --> 00:19:22,096 When women do it, it's often considered desperate or psycho. 347 00:19:22,555 --> 00:19:24,971 I was hoping to prove I was neither. 348 00:19:29,971 --> 00:19:31,305 Hey again, you. 349 00:19:34,221 --> 00:19:35,930 You haven't been out here since I went up, have you? 350 00:19:36,013 --> 00:19:38,471 No, no, I went home. 351 00:19:39,596 --> 00:19:40,680 And you came back? 352 00:19:41,846 --> 00:19:43,263 Yeah, I came back. 353 00:19:44,846 --> 00:19:46,096 See, I… 354 00:19:47,388 --> 00:19:48,555 I think… 355 00:19:49,805 --> 00:19:53,513 No, I feel fairly certain that there is still something between us. 356 00:19:56,055 --> 00:19:57,846 I had a nice time tonight… 357 00:19:58,638 --> 00:19:59,680 with you, I did. 358 00:19:59,763 --> 00:20:01,471 But I just want to leave it at that. 359 00:20:02,221 --> 00:20:03,221 Well… 360 00:20:04,305 --> 00:20:06,805 Can I come up and talk to you for a few minutes? 361 00:20:07,180 --> 00:20:08,763 I don't think that's a good idea. 362 00:20:10,971 --> 00:20:12,721 Because of what might happen? 363 00:20:15,763 --> 00:20:18,013 Because it's not a good time. 364 00:20:20,638 --> 00:20:23,805 Look, I know that you're probably scared and I would be too. 365 00:20:23,888 --> 00:20:25,388 But it's different now. 366 00:20:25,805 --> 00:20:28,555 Things are different. I'm different. 367 00:20:28,971 --> 00:20:31,430 In fact, wait a second. 368 00:20:32,263 --> 00:20:34,513 In fact, cigarettes? Gone. 369 00:20:35,096 --> 00:20:39,096 Seriously, all bad habits, gone. This is a whole new thing. 370 00:20:39,180 --> 00:20:42,930 Because I miss you. And I've missed you. 371 00:20:43,388 --> 00:20:47,513 And it's not just because you look so good, you do, and you should know that. 372 00:20:47,971 --> 00:20:50,680 But I lie in bed at night, and I think about us. 373 00:20:50,763 --> 00:20:53,055 And I think about you holding me and… 374 00:20:53,138 --> 00:20:54,971 You broke my heart! 375 00:21:01,763 --> 00:21:02,763 Carrie. 376 00:21:07,221 --> 00:21:10,346 Samantha, I love your titty-witties. 377 00:21:10,430 --> 00:21:12,971 As I was wishing I had said nothing… 378 00:21:13,055 --> 00:21:15,430 …Samantha decided she had to say something. 379 00:21:15,513 --> 00:21:16,805 Warren… 380 00:21:17,805 --> 00:21:21,430 You're a great fuck, but I don't need the baby talk. 381 00:21:22,638 --> 00:21:26,180 You don't have to call these my titty-witties, these are my breasts. 382 00:21:26,263 --> 00:21:28,555 And you don't have to say anything about them. 383 00:21:29,471 --> 00:21:32,388 It's just sex, and it's fine. 384 00:21:37,721 --> 00:21:39,346 Warren? 385 00:21:43,555 --> 00:21:44,805 Warren? 386 00:21:46,846 --> 00:21:50,096 Would you please come out of there? Can we talk about this like adults? 387 00:21:52,013 --> 00:21:53,221 We're not finished. 388 00:21:55,680 --> 00:21:58,013 I was very closey-wosey. 389 00:22:00,846 --> 00:22:03,346 Okay, you can call them titty-witties. 390 00:22:03,971 --> 00:22:07,263 I'm leaving. I got an early day tomorrow. 391 00:22:08,430 --> 00:22:12,096 Come on, don't pout. We were having such a nice time. 392 00:22:12,180 --> 00:22:14,096 It was only a suggestion. 393 00:22:14,596 --> 00:22:16,096 Where are my shoes? Ah. 394 00:22:19,888 --> 00:22:24,346 Samantha realized that she wore the nipples and attracted a big baby. 395 00:22:25,971 --> 00:22:29,596 And speaking of babies, Charlotte and Trey still were not. 396 00:22:31,513 --> 00:22:32,930 This was delivered today. 397 00:22:35,055 --> 00:22:36,638 I ordered that a week ago. 398 00:22:37,930 --> 00:22:40,305 They needed time to engrave, and I totally forgot. 399 00:22:41,013 --> 00:22:43,388 "We had each other and then we had you. 400 00:22:44,721 --> 00:22:46,513 And then we had everything. 401 00:22:46,846 --> 00:22:48,305 Love, Mommy and Daddy." 402 00:22:49,555 --> 00:22:52,805 It's completely premature. I was just so excited. 403 00:22:53,180 --> 00:22:54,180 And now? 404 00:22:55,305 --> 00:22:56,971 Do you not want a baby anymore? 405 00:22:59,596 --> 00:23:00,930 Of course I do. 406 00:23:02,096 --> 00:23:03,180 Don't you? 407 00:23:03,263 --> 00:23:06,013 We pretty much stopped trying after the Watsons came over. 408 00:23:07,138 --> 00:23:08,138 Yeah. 409 00:23:10,596 --> 00:23:12,263 Kids don't even want to sit by me. 410 00:23:15,721 --> 00:23:17,805 I want to sit next to you. 411 00:23:26,013 --> 00:23:29,846 I knew Cliff and Tricia when they were first married, they were so in love. 412 00:23:31,513 --> 00:23:33,305 Now they're just… 413 00:23:35,138 --> 00:23:36,555 Parents. 414 00:23:37,555 --> 00:23:38,555 Yeah. 415 00:23:43,805 --> 00:23:46,930 Maybe… if we only have one child. 416 00:23:48,513 --> 00:23:50,221 Have one, to start. 417 00:23:51,888 --> 00:23:53,346 See how we do. 418 00:23:54,305 --> 00:23:55,346 Besides… 419 00:23:55,430 --> 00:23:59,305 Then Trey told the lie that all parents-to-be have to tell themselves 420 00:23:59,388 --> 00:24:00,930 in order to procreate. 421 00:24:01,013 --> 00:24:02,596 Our kids will be different. 422 00:24:03,638 --> 00:24:06,930 Even though the whole experience had them a little rattled… 423 00:24:07,013 --> 00:24:11,138 that night Trey and Charlotte made love and possibly a baby. 424 00:24:11,971 --> 00:24:16,555 And downtown, Miranda seemingly had her communication problem licked. 425 00:24:19,763 --> 00:24:22,638 And she felt like she should do something in return. 426 00:24:25,180 --> 00:24:26,763 Would you like a massage? 427 00:24:27,638 --> 00:24:29,221 I would love one. 428 00:24:55,888 --> 00:24:57,346 I don't want to do that! 429 00:24:58,763 --> 00:25:00,305 Why didn't you just say you weren't interested, 430 00:25:00,388 --> 00:25:02,221 before you were talking into my ass? 431 00:25:33,596 --> 00:25:35,721 This time, we didn't need any words. 432 00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:26,680 You wanna do this to make up for the past? 433 00:26:29,138 --> 00:26:30,513 Relieve your conscience? 434 00:26:31,555 --> 00:26:32,930 'Cause we're okay. 435 00:26:34,846 --> 00:26:37,680 I've mentally kicked your butt all over Manhattan. 436 00:26:41,138 --> 00:26:42,430 I'm fine now. 437 00:26:43,096 --> 00:26:44,138 No. 438 00:26:45,805 --> 00:26:47,346 No, I just… 439 00:26:50,680 --> 00:26:51,846 I love you. 440 00:26:55,013 --> 00:26:56,513 I still love you, I just… 441 00:26:59,805 --> 00:27:02,346 wish that I could be your girlfriend again. 442 00:27:11,096 --> 00:27:12,888 I need to think about that. 443 00:27:20,805 --> 00:27:25,221 His actions said he still loved me, or maybe he just missed me… 444 00:27:25,305 --> 00:27:26,971 or maybe he needed closure. 445 00:27:27,888 --> 00:27:29,180 Maybe I'd never know. 446 00:27:33,596 --> 00:27:36,305 The next morning, due to sheer embarrassment, 447 00:27:36,388 --> 00:27:38,388 Miranda got what she needed. 448 00:27:39,305 --> 00:27:43,138 A running buddy who pushed her into the nine-minute mile group. 449 00:27:47,388 --> 00:27:49,555 And I still had no response from Aidan. 450 00:27:59,430 --> 00:28:01,388 Hey, Carrie, you up there? 451 00:28:06,305 --> 00:28:07,930 Okay, let's give it a shot. 452 00:28:08,513 --> 00:28:09,846 Really? 453 00:28:11,055 --> 00:28:12,513 Do you wanna come upstairs? 454 00:28:12,596 --> 00:28:14,971 No, I promised Pete I'd take him for a walk. 455 00:28:15,055 --> 00:28:16,055 Oh. 456 00:28:16,638 --> 00:28:17,930 You wanna go for a walk? 457 00:28:18,013 --> 00:28:19,221 Yeah! 458 00:28:19,971 --> 00:28:21,763 Yeah, let's go for a walk. 459 00:28:22,596 --> 00:28:25,680 - Okay. - Don't move, okay? 460 00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:30,888 I'll be right there!