1 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:07,489 I am about to sit down with AT&T, 2 00:00:07,490 --> 00:00:09,219 trying to close this massive deal, 3 00:00:09,220 --> 00:00:12,320 but that all depends on getting Hawaii right. 4 00:00:12,324 --> 00:00:14,450 And you would rather do Hawaii than RussFest? 5 00:00:14,451 --> 00:00:18,039 I would rather... do my own mother... 6 00:00:18,040 --> 00:00:19,279 than RussFest. 7 00:00:19,280 --> 00:00:22,029 I've made myself the CEO of YaoNet, 8 00:00:22,030 --> 00:00:23,819 which I'm moving back to the US. 9 00:00:23,820 --> 00:00:27,319 Son of Anton, it's the name I've given our new inference API. 10 00:00:27,320 --> 00:00:28,548 He can do whatever he wants. 11 00:00:28,549 --> 00:00:31,909 I call for the attorney general of the state of California 12 00:00:31,910 --> 00:00:34,069 to launch an immediate investigation 13 00:00:34,070 --> 00:00:36,764 of my conduct as CEO of Hooli. 14 00:00:36,765 --> 00:00:39,429 Enjoy the injunction, thumb ass. 15 00:00:39,430 --> 00:00:41,759 Don Delarenta, the AG of California, is gonna do 16 00:00:41,760 --> 00:00:43,020 - what I tell him to do. - Why? 17 00:00:43,021 --> 00:00:44,188 'Cause I have dirt on him. 18 00:00:44,189 --> 00:00:47,192 You ready to dump Hawaii and join RussFest? 19 00:00:48,100 --> 00:00:50,028 It's beautiful. 20 00:00:50,029 --> 00:00:51,520 Boom! 21 00:00:58,036 --> 00:01:00,454 And upon entering RussFest, 22 00:01:00,455 --> 00:01:01,869 each attendee will be given 23 00:01:01,870 --> 00:01:04,369 a PiperNet enabled smartphone, 24 00:01:04,370 --> 00:01:07,519 which will give them access to secure messaging, 25 00:01:07,520 --> 00:01:09,046 social, voice, Internet... 26 00:01:09,047 --> 00:01:10,756 So boring, right? 27 00:01:10,757 --> 00:01:13,384 You see the new logo? Huh? 28 00:01:13,385 --> 00:01:15,052 Huh? Check. 29 00:01:15,053 --> 00:01:17,619 One, two, three. 30 00:01:17,620 --> 00:01:19,557 Tres Comas Tequila. 31 00:01:19,558 --> 00:01:20,976 My brand. Dollar sign. 32 00:01:20,977 --> 00:01:22,489 Billionaire. 33 00:01:22,490 --> 00:01:24,640 Russ. Fest! 34 00:01:25,660 --> 00:01:27,729 RussFest. 35 00:01:27,730 --> 00:01:29,317 Right. 36 00:01:29,318 --> 00:01:31,619 No, yeah, it's-it's gonna be good. 37 00:01:31,620 --> 00:01:32,629 - Uh... - Yeah, it's gonna be great. 38 00:01:32,630 --> 00:01:35,489 Yeah. Well, uh, anyway, uh... 39 00:01:35,490 --> 00:01:38,159 Crazy Town's gonna be there. 40 00:01:38,160 --> 00:01:40,559 So is Puddle of Mudd. You know Puddle of Mudd? 41 00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:41,989 No. 42 00:01:41,990 --> 00:01:43,879 Fucking Puddle of Mudd! Dude, listen. 43 00:01:55,886 --> 00:01:58,471 Right? Yeah, you know Puddle of Mudd. Awesome. 44 00:01:58,472 --> 00:02:00,579 This is a good meeting, guys, excellent. 45 00:02:00,580 --> 00:02:04,899 I gotta jet. Bye, guys. Cory, where you at, dawg? 46 00:02:04,900 --> 00:02:07,104 We're really excited about the possibility of working with you. 47 00:02:07,105 --> 00:02:08,799 Cool. 48 00:02:08,800 --> 00:02:14,259 Yeah. So, uh, what do you, uh... 49 00:02:14,260 --> 00:02:17,489 What do you think, Michael? Uh, you and us. 50 00:02:17,490 --> 00:02:20,117 AT&T, Pied Piper. Dealy deal. 51 00:02:20,118 --> 00:02:22,029 Richard, your tech is impressive, 52 00:02:22,030 --> 00:02:25,479 but we're going with YaoNet, they're a safe bet. 53 00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:27,124 And by the way, it doesn't seem like 54 00:02:27,125 --> 00:02:29,252 you're telling your people out there what's really happening. 55 00:02:29,253 --> 00:02:31,059 - Hang on... - No. Maybe you can do 56 00:02:31,060 --> 00:02:32,756 a deal with someone else. You know, there's, uh... 57 00:02:32,757 --> 00:02:34,382 - No, no, we can't, Michael. - Look, 58 00:02:34,383 --> 00:02:36,423 we already have an agreement in principle. 59 00:02:36,424 --> 00:02:39,579 Okay, well, if you have an agreement in principle, 60 00:02:39,580 --> 00:02:41,029 you can have a disagreement in principle. 61 00:02:41,030 --> 00:02:43,569 I'm sorry. I'm very sorry. 62 00:02:43,570 --> 00:02:47,270 Michael, I'm sorry that you're missing out on this opportunity. 63 00:02:48,740 --> 00:02:53,219 Honestly, I walk everyone to their car. Yeah. 64 00:02:53,220 --> 00:02:55,069 What can we do to sweeten the pot? 65 00:02:55,070 --> 00:02:58,699 You know? Oh, we could add cashless transactions. 66 00:02:58,700 --> 00:03:01,073 What if everything is handled on the phone? 67 00:03:01,074 --> 00:03:03,379 Right? You use it to swipe into parties 68 00:03:03,380 --> 00:03:04,909 - or VIP areas... - Richard, 69 00:03:04,910 --> 00:03:07,029 this is done. 70 00:03:07,030 --> 00:03:09,569 - Okay? - What about holograms? 71 00:03:09,570 --> 00:03:12,838 Okay, this is your last chance. Are you in or out? 72 00:03:17,259 --> 00:03:20,761 - Fuck! - That appears to imply out. 73 00:03:20,762 --> 00:03:22,879 Fuck. Fuck it. Fucker. 74 00:03:22,880 --> 00:03:24,719 - Cockfucker. - Richard, people in there 75 00:03:24,720 --> 00:03:26,899 have been working themselves half to death for weeks 76 00:03:26,900 --> 00:03:28,029 for no pay. 77 00:03:28,030 --> 00:03:30,430 This is not going to go over well. 78 00:03:31,620 --> 00:03:33,880 I'm gonna wait out here while you go in and tell them. 79 00:03:34,880 --> 00:03:36,649 I'm not gonna say anything. 80 00:03:36,650 --> 00:03:38,609 If I keep my mouth shut, 81 00:03:38,610 --> 00:03:41,279 then there's still a chance at snaking the YaoNet deal. 82 00:03:41,280 --> 00:03:43,574 But if I tell everyone in there what's really going on, 83 00:03:43,575 --> 00:03:45,799 we won't make it to RussFest, and we'll be dead. 84 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:48,415 - Is that what you want? - That's a fair point. 85 00:03:49,410 --> 00:03:51,259 That's what I thought. Okay. 86 00:03:51,260 --> 00:03:53,839 Let's get back to work. Let's go. 87 00:03:53,840 --> 00:03:57,069 If this comes out, I'll cover your ass if you cover mine. 88 00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,679 If what comes out? 89 00:03:58,680 --> 00:04:00,909 - My man. - No. 90 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:11,679 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - www.addic7ed.com ... 91 00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:21,656 Oh! 92 00:04:26,490 --> 00:04:28,949 Dodgy gadin, my merry knights of Piper. 93 00:04:28,950 --> 00:04:30,319 Sir Owen, 94 00:04:30,320 --> 00:04:33,159 doing valiant battle with the authentication service. 95 00:04:33,160 --> 00:04:34,659 Yes, good. Yeah. 96 00:04:34,660 --> 00:04:37,279 Oh, and prithee, Becky, 97 00:04:37,280 --> 00:04:38,422 my queen, 98 00:04:38,423 --> 00:04:41,175 how goeth cashless payments? 99 00:04:41,176 --> 00:04:42,760 Russ's pricing keeps tripping us up. 100 00:04:42,761 --> 00:04:44,261 - Okay, how so? - Well, 101 00:04:44,262 --> 00:04:46,329 this morning, he decided everyone at RussFest 102 00:04:46,330 --> 00:04:47,409 should be a billionaire, 103 00:04:47,410 --> 00:04:49,919 so every dollar someone puts into their account 104 00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:51,895 will now be worth one billion RussBucks. 105 00:04:51,896 --> 00:04:53,063 Zwoons! 106 00:04:54,310 --> 00:04:56,799 So, what, like a sandwich will be worth 107 00:04:56,800 --> 00:04:58,651 15 billion RussBucks or something? 108 00:04:58,652 --> 00:05:00,999 Fourteen billion, nine hundred and ninety-nine million, 109 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:02,159 nine hundred and ninety-nine thousand, 110 00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:03,529 nine hundred and ninety-nine RussBucks 111 00:05:03,530 --> 00:05:05,069 and ninety-nine RussCents, 112 00:05:05,070 --> 00:05:06,826 because he thought that would sound cheaper. 113 00:05:06,827 --> 00:05:09,245 It's kind of screwing up the interface, 114 00:05:09,246 --> 00:05:11,879 but the whole AT&T deal is riding on this, right? 115 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:13,040 We'll get there. 116 00:05:13,041 --> 00:05:15,179 Good. Okay. Excellent. 117 00:05:15,180 --> 00:05:20,379 Well, uh, code like the wind, my lady. Yeah. 118 00:05:20,380 --> 00:05:22,699 Ho, ho! Good Friar Gabriel. 119 00:05:22,700 --> 00:05:26,096 How dost thou fair with the ticketing module? 120 00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:28,557 It's gone. 121 00:05:29,370 --> 00:05:30,724 What do you mean gone? 122 00:05:30,725 --> 00:05:33,686 For some reason, Gilfoyle deleted the whole thing 123 00:05:33,687 --> 00:05:35,499 - a few minutes ago. - What? 124 00:05:35,500 --> 00:05:37,309 Yeah. 125 00:05:37,310 --> 00:05:40,479 - Gilfoyle? - Yes, Richard. I'm aware. 126 00:05:40,480 --> 00:05:42,319 The drone dispatching code has been deleted, 127 00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:45,239 and I'm working very hard to restore the right version. 128 00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:46,919 Whoa, whoa. Drone code? 129 00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:49,326 Gabe just told me that the ticketing module got deleted. 130 00:05:49,327 --> 00:05:51,199 Ticketing, too? 131 00:05:51,200 --> 00:05:53,706 Fuck, that's problematic. I'll get on that next. 132 00:05:53,707 --> 00:05:55,829 What the fuck is going on? 133 00:05:55,830 --> 00:05:58,239 Based on the amount of work left to do 134 00:05:58,240 --> 00:06:00,059 and the number of hours left before the festival, 135 00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:01,929 I decided to task Son of Anton 136 00:06:01,930 --> 00:06:04,758 to use machine learning to debug some of our code. 137 00:06:04,759 --> 00:06:08,129 What? Gilfoyle, are you fucking kidding me? 138 00:06:08,130 --> 00:06:10,399 You gave your AI permission 139 00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:12,892 to overwrite code in the internal file system? 140 00:06:12,893 --> 00:06:15,103 - Were you gonna tell me about this? - No. 141 00:06:15,104 --> 00:06:17,771 I thought that was the company policy 142 00:06:17,772 --> 00:06:19,815 - these days. - Okay, well, 143 00:06:19,816 --> 00:06:22,269 your AI just failed, epically. 144 00:06:22,270 --> 00:06:24,529 That's unclear. 145 00:06:24,530 --> 00:06:26,479 It's possible that Son of Anton decided that 146 00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:28,999 the most efficient way to get rid of all the bugs 147 00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:30,499 was to get rid of all the software, 148 00:06:30,500 --> 00:06:33,579 which is technically and statistically correct. 149 00:06:33,580 --> 00:06:36,419 But artificial neural nets are sort of a black box, 150 00:06:36,420 --> 00:06:38,876 - so we'll never know for sure. - Hey, Richard. 151 00:06:38,877 --> 00:06:42,296 Did you order meat? Like a bunch of meat? 152 00:06:42,297 --> 00:06:46,600 Like 4,000 pounds of meat? 153 00:06:47,802 --> 00:06:49,619 Interesting. 154 00:06:49,620 --> 00:06:53,079 I put Son of Anton on finding us cheap hamburgers for lunch. 155 00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:56,810 It looks like the reward function was a little under-specified. 156 00:06:56,811 --> 00:06:59,356 Okay, from now on, Son of Anton is banned. 157 00:06:59,357 --> 00:07:03,339 Just write code like a normal human fucking being, please. 158 00:07:03,340 --> 00:07:04,483 Hey, Gilfoyle. 159 00:07:04,484 --> 00:07:06,219 So, I've been thinking about your AI, 160 00:07:06,220 --> 00:07:07,959 and its many deficits. 161 00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:09,619 I think Son of Anton's issue 162 00:07:09,620 --> 00:07:11,659 might be how it's handling reward uncertainty. 163 00:07:11,660 --> 00:07:14,099 Your issue may be insecurity, 164 00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:17,665 masked by false bravado and unisex cologne. 165 00:07:17,666 --> 00:07:20,329 Fuck off. It's not unisex. 166 00:07:26,410 --> 00:07:28,175 Hey, um, Richard? 167 00:07:28,176 --> 00:07:31,261 I was curious if you had a moment to clear the air. 168 00:07:31,262 --> 00:07:32,721 Is this about Holden? 169 00:07:32,722 --> 00:07:35,057 No. Holden's a bitch and he quit. 170 00:07:35,058 --> 00:07:36,851 No, I-I wanted to talk to you 171 00:07:36,852 --> 00:07:39,819 about the Gwart-shaped tension between us. 172 00:07:39,820 --> 00:07:41,939 You know, she and I worked very closely together, 173 00:07:41,940 --> 00:07:43,979 and now she's working for YaoNet. 174 00:07:43,980 --> 00:07:45,949 She's, essentially, the enemy, 175 00:07:45,950 --> 00:07:48,862 so it would be fair for you to have concerns. 176 00:07:48,863 --> 00:07:50,406 I have no concerns. 177 00:07:50,407 --> 00:07:51,989 Okay, good. 178 00:07:51,990 --> 00:07:54,219 Because I don't think about her, you know, 179 00:07:54,220 --> 00:07:56,575 or if she's hungry or cold right now, 180 00:07:56,576 --> 00:07:59,159 or if she's still giving most of her income to Rand Paul. 181 00:07:59,160 --> 00:08:01,029 Richard! 182 00:08:01,030 --> 00:08:03,419 Check it! Okay. 183 00:08:03,420 --> 00:08:05,295 Hologram question. 184 00:08:05,296 --> 00:08:08,800 You told AT&T that the hologram would be interactive, right? 185 00:08:09,450 --> 00:08:11,659 - Yes. - See, asshole? 186 00:08:11,660 --> 00:08:13,759 My hologram can 100% 187 00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:15,779 dry hump festival-goers from behind. 188 00:08:15,780 --> 00:08:18,058 If they ask for it. Hashtag woke. 189 00:08:18,059 --> 00:08:20,477 All right. Let's go! 190 00:08:20,478 --> 00:08:23,229 Spidey jump. 191 00:08:49,070 --> 00:08:51,239 Ticketing's running smoothly. 192 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:53,599 Mobile purchasing seems stable. 193 00:08:53,600 --> 00:08:54,845 That's good. 194 00:08:54,846 --> 00:08:57,339 - Russ. Hey. - I fucked up, Richard. 195 00:08:57,340 --> 00:08:59,579 Why did I make one dollar worth a billion RussBucks? 196 00:08:59,580 --> 00:09:00,919 I mean, everyone wants to be a billionaire, 197 00:09:00,920 --> 00:09:02,279 but they didn't earn it, so are they gonna feel bad 198 00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:03,799 about themselves? Why would I do that? 199 00:09:03,800 --> 00:09:05,759 I guess because I'm an asshole and I wanna have a bad festival! 200 00:09:05,760 --> 00:09:07,309 No, no, Russ. 201 00:09:07,310 --> 00:09:09,559 Don't worry about it. Everything is amazing. 202 00:09:09,560 --> 00:09:11,109 - Yeah? - Yeah, I tell you what. 203 00:09:11,110 --> 00:09:12,322 Why don't we see the hologram? 204 00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:16,319 - The hologram's ready? - It's up. 205 00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:18,199 - Yeah, let's go see the hologram. - Okay, come on. 206 00:09:18,200 --> 00:09:21,140 - This way. - Fuck yeah! Fucking hologram! 207 00:09:36,740 --> 00:09:39,999 - See? There he is. - Okay. 208 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:43,139 Yeah, that's pretty sweet. 209 00:09:43,140 --> 00:09:44,879 Fist bump! 210 00:09:44,880 --> 00:09:46,659 Dry hump! 211 00:09:46,660 --> 00:09:48,869 Double guns! 212 00:09:48,870 --> 00:09:50,235 Wait, what's it doing? 213 00:09:52,840 --> 00:09:54,190 Richard, what the fuck? 214 00:09:55,660 --> 00:09:57,239 Well, uh, uh... 215 00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:58,859 Once more people show up, 216 00:09:58,860 --> 00:10:01,359 the network effect will take over, 217 00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:02,994 and it will stabilize, I promise. 218 00:10:02,995 --> 00:10:05,059 Do you swear? Because one time, I threw a party 219 00:10:05,060 --> 00:10:07,409 and David Copperfield said it was beat. 220 00:10:07,410 --> 00:10:08,859 Promise me that this will not be beat. 221 00:10:08,860 --> 00:10:09,878 It won't be beat. 222 00:10:09,879 --> 00:10:12,470 - Okay. Okay. - Yeah. 223 00:10:13,800 --> 00:10:15,551 I know, I know. Why did I wear these pants? 224 00:10:15,552 --> 00:10:17,489 Part denim, part leather. 225 00:10:17,490 --> 00:10:18,819 Pick a lane, Russ. 226 00:10:18,820 --> 00:10:20,848 Fuck. Fuck. 227 00:10:20,849 --> 00:10:23,389 Fuck, I'm gonna change my pants! 228 00:10:31,901 --> 00:10:34,028 Jared, what are you doing? Come on! 229 00:10:37,370 --> 00:10:38,782 Hey, what the fuck is going on? 230 00:10:38,783 --> 00:10:40,679 Russ's hologram is glitching like crazy. 231 00:10:40,680 --> 00:10:42,039 We don't know. Everything's lagging: 232 00:10:42,040 --> 00:10:44,529 our apps, third party apps, transactions. 233 00:10:44,530 --> 00:10:46,139 Everything was fine and then the network 234 00:10:46,140 --> 00:10:47,373 started deteriorating. 235 00:10:47,374 --> 00:10:50,499 We should be way closer to 100% capacity by now. 236 00:10:50,500 --> 00:10:52,796 I'm running diagnostics, but I haven't found anything. 237 00:10:52,797 --> 00:10:55,424 Also, this trailer is filled with ants. 238 00:10:55,425 --> 00:10:57,549 Fucking Gabe. 239 00:10:57,550 --> 00:10:59,699 I'm sorry, ma'am, I don't know anything 240 00:10:59,700 --> 00:11:02,519 about a Pied Piper girls' coding camp. 241 00:11:02,520 --> 00:11:05,559 Oh, ask Priyanka. That sounds like her bag of bullshit. 242 00:11:05,560 --> 00:11:07,659 I did, it's not hers. 243 00:11:07,660 --> 00:11:09,819 I'm sorry. You said you spoke to an employee 244 00:11:09,820 --> 00:11:12,390 named Eric Bachman? 245 00:11:13,720 --> 00:11:16,199 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 246 00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:18,430 Hey. Give me that. 247 00:11:19,570 --> 00:11:22,339 Hi. Does your Eric Bachman 248 00:11:22,340 --> 00:11:24,160 have a Chinese accent? 249 00:11:34,110 --> 00:11:36,779 Okay. I tweaked the microwave backhaul antennas. 250 00:11:36,780 --> 00:11:38,843 Did that make any difference to the... 251 00:11:39,910 --> 00:11:41,721 Is there something you wanna tell us? 252 00:11:42,870 --> 00:11:45,089 I respect you all? 253 00:11:46,309 --> 00:11:49,645 Hello. I am giving a press conference, 254 00:11:49,646 --> 00:11:53,273 and I am so happy to be in partnership with Ah-Tay-ee-Tay. 255 00:11:53,274 --> 00:11:55,400 You can surf our decentralized Internet 256 00:11:55,401 --> 00:11:58,369 like Hawaiian surfers can surf the big waves. 257 00:12:00,380 --> 00:12:03,360 Whoa. Bombshell. 258 00:12:03,368 --> 00:12:06,099 Michael must've known they were going with YaoNet. 259 00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:07,538 Did you know? 260 00:12:09,370 --> 00:12:10,779 You knew, 261 00:12:10,780 --> 00:12:12,869 and you added more features. 262 00:12:12,870 --> 00:12:16,039 Ticketing, banking, the fucking hologram. 263 00:12:16,040 --> 00:12:18,419 You've had us on a death march for nothing. 264 00:12:18,420 --> 00:12:21,549 What? Richard! No. 265 00:12:21,550 --> 00:12:23,804 Aah! 266 00:12:23,805 --> 00:12:27,391 Gilfoyle, you're being awfully quiet. 267 00:12:27,392 --> 00:12:29,935 - Did you know? - Now look, guys, 268 00:12:29,936 --> 00:12:32,938 these deals never really ever close. 269 00:12:32,939 --> 00:12:35,849 "AT&T and YaoNet close deal." 270 00:12:35,850 --> 00:12:38,040 That seems pretty closed to me. 271 00:12:38,050 --> 00:12:39,949 My guys. 272 00:12:39,950 --> 00:12:42,279 How dare you do this to my guys? 273 00:12:42,280 --> 00:12:45,379 Can we just please have this discussion later 274 00:12:45,380 --> 00:12:46,989 because right now, we need to figure out... 275 00:12:46,990 --> 00:12:49,199 We? Who's we? 276 00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:51,124 - We're out. - Yeah. 277 00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:54,869 What? Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa. 278 00:12:54,870 --> 00:12:55,999 My guys. 279 00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:57,320 Gabe... 280 00:12:57,940 --> 00:12:59,209 You can go. 281 00:12:59,210 --> 00:13:02,499 I'll contact you all later for your exit interviews, 282 00:13:02,500 --> 00:13:04,886 and I'm sorry about the ants. 283 00:13:04,887 --> 00:13:07,347 Well, at least we all stuck together. 284 00:13:07,348 --> 00:13:08,849 Okay. Look, 285 00:13:08,850 --> 00:13:11,319 all the systems are built. 286 00:13:11,320 --> 00:13:14,029 I mean, screw those guys for leaving. Their loss. 287 00:13:14,030 --> 00:13:15,857 We can still do this without them, right? 288 00:13:15,858 --> 00:13:18,139 No. Unless the three of us 289 00:13:18,140 --> 00:13:21,399 stay up 24 hours a day for three days in a row. Fuck. 290 00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:22,879 Yeah, exactly! Okay. All we need to do 291 00:13:22,880 --> 00:13:26,419 is just find the bug that's stalling us and squash it, 292 00:13:26,420 --> 00:13:28,610 just like these fucking ants. 293 00:13:28,619 --> 00:13:31,739 No sleep for three days straight. 294 00:13:31,740 --> 00:13:32,790 Sweet. 295 00:13:35,030 --> 00:13:39,046 - Is that Gwart? - Oh, no. It's a garbage can. 296 00:13:39,047 --> 00:13:41,669 No, that's Gwart. 297 00:13:41,670 --> 00:13:44,889 Well, she works for YaoNet, 298 00:13:44,890 --> 00:13:46,300 so what is she doing here? 299 00:13:46,304 --> 00:13:49,529 And why does she have access to the staff only area? 300 00:13:49,530 --> 00:13:52,685 Gwart hates Puddle of Mudd. She's a Linkin Park girl. 301 00:14:01,152 --> 00:14:03,319 You gotta be fucking kidding me. 302 00:14:19,700 --> 00:14:22,909 Big Head! What the hell is going on here? 303 00:14:22,910 --> 00:14:25,300 - What do you mean? - Who let her in? 304 00:14:25,301 --> 00:14:27,928 I take one lousy shit... 305 00:14:27,929 --> 00:14:31,049 Jian-Yang, what is going on here? 306 00:14:31,050 --> 00:14:33,219 All girls coding camp. 307 00:14:33,220 --> 00:14:35,560 I support woman. 308 00:14:35,561 --> 00:14:38,600 Mr. Eric, I'm finished. 309 00:14:40,950 --> 00:14:44,236 "This diet cream helped my husband lose weight. 310 00:14:44,237 --> 00:14:47,239 He was fat fuck. Now, he not. 311 00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:49,739 Fi star, the end." 312 00:14:49,740 --> 00:14:51,868 I wrote exactly like Mr. Eric told me to. 313 00:14:51,869 --> 00:14:54,079 It's very good, Sophie. 314 00:14:54,080 --> 00:14:55,748 Very good. 315 00:14:57,910 --> 00:15:00,059 You're using underage girls 316 00:15:00,060 --> 00:15:03,159 as slave labor for a fake Amazon review farm? 317 00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:04,339 Yes. 318 00:15:04,340 --> 00:15:07,050 And-And you're using the Pied Piper name? 319 00:15:07,051 --> 00:15:08,344 Yes. 320 00:15:09,950 --> 00:15:11,659 It's okay. 321 00:15:11,660 --> 00:15:12,931 I have money. 322 00:15:13,990 --> 00:15:16,477 Girls! Call your parents. 323 00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:22,442 - God, that really is her. - What the fuck? 324 00:15:24,530 --> 00:15:26,189 It's sabotage. 325 00:15:26,190 --> 00:15:28,479 Guys, nobody's eating the peyote. Will you eat the peyote, 326 00:15:28,480 --> 00:15:31,069 and then that'll break the ice and they'll eat the peyote? 327 00:15:31,070 --> 00:15:33,119 What? 328 00:15:33,120 --> 00:15:34,370 You hate the shorts? 329 00:15:36,920 --> 00:15:39,310 You hate the shorts. 330 00:15:40,220 --> 00:15:41,819 Fuck it. 331 00:15:41,820 --> 00:15:44,254 Just look at my fucking legs! 332 00:15:44,255 --> 00:15:46,430 Let's go. Go. 333 00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:51,869 I knew it! I knew it. 334 00:15:51,870 --> 00:15:53,979 Our network's not slowing down because we fucked up. 335 00:15:53,980 --> 00:15:56,141 It's because YaoNet's here and they are attacking us. 336 00:15:56,142 --> 00:15:57,819 Is SlipSox even a real company? 337 00:15:57,820 --> 00:16:00,563 Incorporated a week ago, no website. 338 00:16:01,620 --> 00:16:03,849 It's a cover. It's YaoNet! 339 00:16:03,850 --> 00:16:05,499 Laurie is somehow fucking 340 00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:06,860 with our routing to slow down the network. 341 00:16:06,861 --> 00:16:08,679 But why would they bother attacking us? 342 00:16:08,680 --> 00:16:10,699 They have the AT&T deal all locked up. 343 00:16:10,700 --> 00:16:14,279 Unless... they don't. 344 00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:16,879 If she thinks their Hawaii launch might fail, 345 00:16:16,880 --> 00:16:18,439 that would be a reason to try to wipe us out 346 00:16:18,440 --> 00:16:19,959 while they have the chance. 347 00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:23,409 So, if we can stay alive till YaoNet fucks up Hawaii, 348 00:16:23,410 --> 00:16:24,503 we could swoop in. 349 00:16:24,504 --> 00:16:26,588 Like a basketball dunker. 350 00:16:26,589 --> 00:16:28,924 - We're still in this, boys. - All right. 351 00:16:28,925 --> 00:16:32,319 So, let's boot those meddling bums off of the network. 352 00:16:32,320 --> 00:16:33,929 Enough of this crap! 353 00:16:33,930 --> 00:16:36,699 Yeah. Well, uh, that's impossible 354 00:16:36,700 --> 00:16:39,199 'cause the whole point of a decentralized network 355 00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:42,619 is to prevent a single host from controlling access. 356 00:16:42,620 --> 00:16:44,859 So dictators can't ban dissidents. 357 00:16:44,860 --> 00:16:46,519 Right now, there's no way to kill them 358 00:16:46,520 --> 00:16:48,778 or stop them throttling the network. 359 00:16:48,779 --> 00:16:52,820 This is why things are easier in China. 360 00:16:54,540 --> 00:16:57,280 China... 361 00:17:00,030 --> 00:17:03,416 Don't mess with Pied Piper again, you little fucker. 362 00:17:08,570 --> 00:17:10,589 Hello? 363 00:17:10,590 --> 00:17:12,059 Jian-Yang! Hey! 364 00:17:12,060 --> 00:17:15,345 Hey, uh, what's going on, boss man? 365 00:17:15,346 --> 00:17:18,557 It's, uh, Richard Hendricks, from Pied Piper. 366 00:17:18,558 --> 00:17:20,109 How's it going, dude? 367 00:17:20,110 --> 00:17:21,319 Very bad. 368 00:17:21,320 --> 00:17:24,187 My underage girl slaves all left. 369 00:17:24,188 --> 00:17:26,064 Oh, yeah, totally. Bummer. 370 00:17:26,065 --> 00:17:27,482 Well, you'll find them. 371 00:17:27,483 --> 00:17:29,943 Anyway, kind of a silly question, um... 372 00:17:29,944 --> 00:17:32,529 You know how you stole the Pied Piper source code? 373 00:17:32,530 --> 00:17:35,119 - Yes. - Yeah, and then you rewrote it 374 00:17:35,120 --> 00:17:36,679 into what is now YaoNet? 375 00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:38,459 - Yes. - Right, um, 376 00:17:38,460 --> 00:17:40,939 did the Chinese government, by any chance, 377 00:17:40,940 --> 00:17:42,831 require you to add a back door? 378 00:17:42,832 --> 00:17:45,449 Yes, I have a SSH key in my house, 379 00:17:45,450 --> 00:17:49,459 - written down. - Cool! Wow! Uh... 380 00:17:49,460 --> 00:17:51,559 I don't suppose I could get that from you. 381 00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:54,343 Uh, it's just that Pied Piper's in kind of a jam. 382 00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:58,869 Yes. Pied Piper... 383 00:17:58,870 --> 00:18:02,960 Your white witch just shut down my business. 384 00:18:02,977 --> 00:18:05,260 Oh. Okay. 385 00:18:07,940 --> 00:18:09,149 So? 386 00:18:15,660 --> 00:18:17,810 Hey, Richard, what's up? 387 00:18:22,340 --> 00:18:25,319 Fuck. 388 00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:26,958 Jian-Yang, please. 389 00:18:26,959 --> 00:18:28,877 Monica, 390 00:18:28,878 --> 00:18:32,757 for the last five years, you have been horrible. 391 00:18:33,660 --> 00:18:35,342 You never smile. 392 00:18:35,343 --> 00:18:37,509 You never kiss me. 393 00:18:37,510 --> 00:18:41,539 I'll never give you anything you want. 394 00:18:41,540 --> 00:18:43,640 I hate you. 395 00:18:43,643 --> 00:18:45,936 Jian-Yang, I need that key. 396 00:18:47,030 --> 00:18:48,189 This key? 397 00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:52,760 Okay, let's... let's just be reasonable. 398 00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:55,270 - Gimme it! - Shit! 399 00:18:55,279 --> 00:18:57,614 Come on! Fuck! 400 00:18:59,740 --> 00:19:02,410 - No! Stop! - Oh. 401 00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:08,119 Oh, my God! 402 00:19:08,120 --> 00:19:09,293 Yikes. 403 00:19:14,423 --> 00:19:17,529 You and I, we could've run this town, 404 00:19:17,530 --> 00:19:20,029 but you blew it, mister. 405 00:19:25,490 --> 00:19:28,561 A, four, six, capital G, 406 00:19:28,562 --> 00:19:32,499 two, nine, lowercase J, four, three... 407 00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:35,020 Wait, wait, wait. Wha-what are you singing? 408 00:19:35,027 --> 00:19:36,986 Is-Is that the key? 409 00:19:36,987 --> 00:19:39,739 Key? No. That's just the letters 410 00:19:39,740 --> 00:19:41,399 and numbers that were on that little sheet of paper 411 00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:42,859 that Jian-Yang swallowed. 412 00:19:42,860 --> 00:19:44,719 Yeah, for some reason, stuff's really like sticking 413 00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:46,079 in my head these days. 414 00:19:46,080 --> 00:19:48,419 Wait. Big Head, Richard needs those letters and numbers. 415 00:19:48,420 --> 00:19:50,041 Can-can you sing it again? 416 00:19:50,042 --> 00:19:51,659 Uh, sure. Yeah. 417 00:19:51,660 --> 00:19:53,759 A, four, six, 418 00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:56,639 capital G, two, nine, lowercase J... 419 00:19:56,640 --> 00:19:58,659 Wait, do you wanna maybe call Richard first, 420 00:19:58,660 --> 00:20:02,178 - and then I could sing it? - Holy shit! Yes! Thank you! 421 00:20:02,179 --> 00:20:04,890 Capital M, capital R... 422 00:20:05,620 --> 00:20:06,970 that's it? 423 00:20:08,894 --> 00:20:10,659 Okay! 424 00:20:10,660 --> 00:20:12,619 Yeah, we're in! It worked! 425 00:20:12,620 --> 00:20:16,369 Thank you. Uh, thanks, guys. Thanks, Big Head. 426 00:20:16,370 --> 00:20:18,679 All right, YaoNet, SlipSox, 427 00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:21,930 whoever the fuck you are, you think you can fuck with us? 428 00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:24,279 They hung up. 429 00:20:24,280 --> 00:20:26,620 - Oh. - Yeah. 430 00:20:27,570 --> 00:20:30,299 - Wait, what the fuck is this? - This is YaoNet's server? 431 00:20:30,300 --> 00:20:32,876 Fuck. It's a honeypot. 432 00:20:32,877 --> 00:20:34,335 What, is that a good thing? 433 00:20:34,336 --> 00:20:37,459 No. It's not. Run the "file" command. 434 00:20:37,460 --> 00:20:39,819 It's basically a bullshit shell in case 435 00:20:39,820 --> 00:20:41,779 the Chinese government actually used the key. 436 00:20:41,780 --> 00:20:42,989 It's like a fake storefront. 437 00:20:42,990 --> 00:20:45,388 Okay, so they have to be running SSH on a different port. 438 00:20:45,389 --> 00:20:46,779 How do we find the real one? 439 00:20:46,780 --> 00:20:48,859 We could N-map it to check every single one, 440 00:20:48,860 --> 00:20:50,970 but that would take forever. 441 00:20:52,450 --> 00:20:55,199 Okay. Fuck. Well, 442 00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:57,317 somehow, we have to find the correct port number. 443 00:20:57,318 --> 00:21:00,488 Wait, what time is it? 444 00:21:05,980 --> 00:21:08,069 One large artichoke, 445 00:21:08,070 --> 00:21:10,830 extra rare, cup of mayonnaise. 446 00:21:10,831 --> 00:21:14,293 I see you still take your snack at 3:17. 447 00:21:17,421 --> 00:21:19,214 I know that SlipSox is YaoNet, 448 00:21:19,215 --> 00:21:21,419 and that you've infiltrated Pied Piper, 449 00:21:21,420 --> 00:21:24,879 and I know that you're here, working with Laurie Bream. 450 00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:26,419 No, let me finish. 451 00:21:26,420 --> 00:21:29,949 We didn't end on the best of terms, but... 452 00:21:29,950 --> 00:21:33,639 when we were together, I feel like I really saw you, 453 00:21:33,640 --> 00:21:35,319 the real you. 454 00:21:35,320 --> 00:21:38,233 I saw you, Gwart! I know you! 455 00:21:38,234 --> 00:21:40,339 No, let me finish. I have to say this 456 00:21:40,340 --> 00:21:41,819 or I'm never gonna get it out. 457 00:21:41,820 --> 00:21:45,489 Now, I wish I was asking you to go for a walk with me 458 00:21:45,490 --> 00:21:48,719 or to watch Magic Mike XL for the umpteenth time, 459 00:21:48,720 --> 00:21:51,099 but I'm asking you to give us access to YaoNet, 460 00:21:51,100 --> 00:21:53,279 and not just to save my company, 461 00:21:53,280 --> 00:21:55,125 but to save my sanity. 462 00:21:56,335 --> 00:22:00,069 Because if I was wrong about who you are, 463 00:22:00,070 --> 00:22:02,758 then I don't know who I am. 464 00:22:05,370 --> 00:22:07,529 So there you have it. 465 00:22:07,530 --> 00:22:11,919 I've said all I gotta say, and... 466 00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:14,010 it's up to you now. 467 00:22:25,700 --> 00:22:28,239 I see. So, 468 00:22:28,240 --> 00:22:32,159 Pied Piper's network capacity is degrading steadily. 469 00:22:32,160 --> 00:22:35,369 Hmm, wonderful. 470 00:22:35,370 --> 00:22:38,779 And their adaptive routing optimization techniques 471 00:22:38,780 --> 00:22:41,220 aren't helping them. 472 00:22:58,110 --> 00:23:00,699 Hey, guys. Um, I'm so sorry... 473 00:23:00,700 --> 00:23:03,568 I don't know what you did, but it worked. 474 00:23:03,569 --> 00:23:06,279 - What? - Someone just messaged us 475 00:23:06,280 --> 00:23:07,949 the correct port 476 00:23:07,950 --> 00:23:09,991 - to YaoNet's ad server. - Yeah! 477 00:23:09,992 --> 00:23:11,701 Really? 478 00:23:11,702 --> 00:23:13,661 Yep. Gilfoyle revoked all their access, 479 00:23:13,662 --> 00:23:16,419 and is removing their app from every client on PiperNet. 480 00:23:16,420 --> 00:23:18,875 In a couple of minutes, we'll be back up to speed. 481 00:23:18,876 --> 00:23:21,779 Plus, we cloned their repository, 482 00:23:21,780 --> 00:23:24,422 so we'll just poke around 483 00:23:24,423 --> 00:23:26,619 and see exactly what they're hiding! 484 00:23:26,620 --> 00:23:28,885 It's a big win for the Piper boys. 485 00:23:28,886 --> 00:23:30,720 So, Gilfoyle, 486 00:23:30,721 --> 00:23:32,347 how much faster is our network now? 487 00:23:32,348 --> 00:23:34,766 Zero faster. It's slower, 488 00:23:34,767 --> 00:23:37,602 - and still degrading. - What are you talking about? 489 00:23:37,603 --> 00:23:40,480 About how our network is slower and still degrading. 490 00:23:40,481 --> 00:23:42,309 We're currently at 60%. 491 00:23:42,310 --> 00:23:44,939 But that's not possible. 492 00:23:44,940 --> 00:23:46,399 Our network's shit latency 493 00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:49,364 is slowing down every single purchase. 494 00:23:49,365 --> 00:23:50,531 Look at the bathrooms. 495 00:23:50,532 --> 00:23:52,909 The scanner's aren't working. 496 00:23:52,910 --> 00:23:55,319 Fucking Russ and his pay toilets. 497 00:23:55,320 --> 00:23:58,310 Okay, we gotta figure this out or there's gonna be a riot. 498 00:24:00,540 --> 00:24:02,259 There you assholes are! 499 00:24:02,260 --> 00:24:04,319 You guys fucking with me? Did you get my messages? 500 00:24:04,320 --> 00:24:05,506 Uh... 501 00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:07,829 Messaging's stalling, too. 502 00:24:07,830 --> 00:24:10,449 I sent you guys photos of three different outfits. 503 00:24:10,450 --> 00:24:12,369 Did you hate them all? Wha... 504 00:24:12,370 --> 00:24:13,469 What's wrong? 505 00:24:13,470 --> 00:24:16,719 Uh, no. Definitely the second one. 506 00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:18,319 - I like the second one. - You really think 507 00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:19,849 a white guy can wear that and get away with it? 508 00:24:19,850 --> 00:24:22,569 - Definitely. - No. 509 00:24:22,570 --> 00:24:24,439 You know what? You're right. 510 00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:25,776 Fuck political correctness. 511 00:24:25,777 --> 00:24:29,238 I'm looking at four guys that fuck! 512 00:24:30,570 --> 00:24:32,249 Okay, let's rerun the diagnostics. 513 00:24:32,250 --> 00:24:33,949 Maybe we missed something. 514 00:24:36,490 --> 00:24:37,870 Laurie! 515 00:24:37,871 --> 00:24:40,456 Laurie Bream! Well, well, well. 516 00:24:40,457 --> 00:24:43,209 - Fleeing the scene of the crime? - Crime? 517 00:24:43,210 --> 00:24:46,499 You can't win. Your network is garbage. 518 00:24:46,500 --> 00:24:49,399 And maybe, if you save us some time by telling us 519 00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:51,659 how you're slowing down our network, 520 00:24:51,660 --> 00:24:53,094 I won't go to the police. 521 00:24:53,095 --> 00:24:56,472 Slowing down your network? That would be "un-tethical." 522 00:24:56,473 --> 00:24:57,808 Why would I... 523 00:24:58,960 --> 00:25:01,920 Oh. Richard... 524 00:25:01,930 --> 00:25:03,938 You do not know. 525 00:25:03,939 --> 00:25:05,769 Know what? 526 00:25:05,770 --> 00:25:07,839 As you correctly surmised, 527 00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:10,859 YaoNet doesn't work. It does not scale. 528 00:25:10,860 --> 00:25:13,179 - Ha! - However, we did not come here 529 00:25:13,180 --> 00:25:15,379 to attack you, simply to observe you, 530 00:25:15,380 --> 00:25:17,019 spy on you, if you wish, 531 00:25:17,020 --> 00:25:19,479 in order to see how you got PiperNet to work, 532 00:25:19,480 --> 00:25:21,410 which, it turns out, you did not. 533 00:25:21,415 --> 00:25:22,999 Uh, what? 534 00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:26,461 Your compression is inadequate in the face of bottlenecks 535 00:25:26,462 --> 00:25:28,838 that emerge between node-cluster edges. 536 00:25:28,839 --> 00:25:31,129 Pied Piper does not scale. 537 00:25:31,130 --> 00:25:34,919 It is as impracticable as YaoNet. 538 00:25:34,920 --> 00:25:36,089 Fuck. 539 00:25:36,090 --> 00:25:37,719 Ah, yes. 540 00:25:37,720 --> 00:25:39,179 That can't be right. 541 00:25:39,180 --> 00:25:41,434 And yet it is. 542 00:25:41,435 --> 00:25:44,854 I wish we had plagiarized more functional code, 543 00:25:44,855 --> 00:25:47,659 and yet it is this technology that AT&T has purchased, 544 00:25:47,660 --> 00:25:48,809 functional or no. 545 00:25:48,810 --> 00:25:51,139 And with Maximo's sufficient funding, 546 00:25:51,140 --> 00:25:53,019 we will certainly be able to weather the storm 547 00:25:53,020 --> 00:25:55,239 until we reach launch, at which time 548 00:25:55,240 --> 00:25:58,534 it seems likely that AT&T may deem our business a failure. 549 00:25:58,535 --> 00:26:01,412 However, at this point, I will have already made 550 00:26:01,413 --> 00:26:04,659 many multiples on my initial investment. 551 00:26:04,660 --> 00:26:08,099 Ah, I cannot speak to your backup plan. 552 00:26:08,100 --> 00:26:09,999 Hmm, yes. 553 00:26:10,000 --> 00:26:12,770 Good day, gentlemen. 554 00:26:21,820 --> 00:26:24,779 Well, she's just a hater, and, no disrespect, 555 00:26:24,780 --> 00:26:26,772 - but she can eat shit. - Yeah, 556 00:26:26,773 --> 00:26:28,199 obviously. 557 00:26:28,200 --> 00:26:30,739 We have to be able to figure something out. 558 00:26:30,740 --> 00:26:32,402 You'll think of something, right? 559 00:26:32,403 --> 00:26:34,600 Richard? 560 00:26:37,450 --> 00:26:39,909 Six fucking years! 561 00:26:39,910 --> 00:26:43,159 Six years... we've wasted! 562 00:26:43,160 --> 00:26:45,859 Building this worthless piece of shit! 563 00:26:45,860 --> 00:26:47,819 Are fucking kidding me? 564 00:26:49,740 --> 00:26:52,999 I'm fine. I just gotta go to the bathroom. 565 00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:56,467 I don't think he thought of anything. 566 00:26:58,345 --> 00:27:00,449 Yeah! 567 00:27:00,450 --> 00:27:03,976 Go with option one, and I'm not gonna feel shitty about it. 568 00:27:03,977 --> 00:27:05,850 Right? 569 00:27:07,100 --> 00:27:08,729 Fuck me. 570 00:27:08,730 --> 00:27:10,979 Hey, guys, Richard's been locked in there 571 00:27:10,980 --> 00:27:12,150 for three hours. 572 00:27:12,151 --> 00:27:14,109 Should we kick down the door? 573 00:27:14,110 --> 00:27:17,071 No, let's honor him with some space. 574 00:27:17,072 --> 00:27:19,339 I'll wait for him to fall asleep, and then I'll... 575 00:27:19,340 --> 00:27:21,109 I'll lower myself down through the vent. 576 00:27:21,110 --> 00:27:23,279 Would it be a dick move 577 00:27:23,280 --> 00:27:25,746 to ask him for his keys and then we drive home? 578 00:27:25,747 --> 00:27:28,369 Well, he'd be abandoned here... 579 00:27:28,370 --> 00:27:30,029 Holy shit. 580 00:27:30,030 --> 00:27:31,669 That's fantastic. 581 00:27:31,670 --> 00:27:34,390 What the... fuck? 582 00:27:35,780 --> 00:27:37,549 Hey, you guys? 583 00:27:37,550 --> 00:27:40,840 I did something. 584 00:27:40,846 --> 00:27:43,069 All right, so, I was, uh, 585 00:27:43,070 --> 00:27:45,319 fiddling around on Gilfoyle's laptop, 586 00:27:45,320 --> 00:27:47,289 and I was looking down, 587 00:27:47,290 --> 00:27:50,062 and then I realized that the solution was 588 00:27:50,063 --> 00:27:51,899 staring at me right in the face. 589 00:27:51,900 --> 00:27:53,107 Ants. 590 00:27:53,108 --> 00:27:54,317 It occurred to me 591 00:27:54,318 --> 00:27:57,737 that our network is kind of like a series of paths, 592 00:27:57,738 --> 00:28:01,157 much like the trails ants use in order to forage for food. 593 00:28:01,158 --> 00:28:05,699 But then, I thought that we don't need better paths. 594 00:28:05,700 --> 00:28:08,699 We need better ants. You see? 595 00:28:08,700 --> 00:28:12,793 - Fuck gradient descent. - What? 596 00:28:12,794 --> 00:28:16,949 I don't need to use Gilfoyle's AI in order to improve middle-out. 597 00:28:16,950 --> 00:28:21,219 I need to use middle-out to create a new AI. 598 00:28:21,220 --> 00:28:26,869 A symbolic AI. And now, it is teaching itself 599 00:28:26,870 --> 00:28:29,199 how to optimize. 600 00:28:29,200 --> 00:28:32,659 So, you fucked around with Son of Anton's brain, 601 00:28:32,660 --> 00:28:35,119 and then gave him access 602 00:28:35,120 --> 00:28:38,069 to our entire network infrastructure, 603 00:28:38,070 --> 00:28:39,819 - while it's still running? - Yes. 604 00:28:39,820 --> 00:28:42,540 Richard, that's like asking a robot to change your tire 605 00:28:42,550 --> 00:28:44,409 while you're driving on the freeway! 606 00:28:44,410 --> 00:28:45,576 Hold this. 607 00:28:45,577 --> 00:28:47,199 Gimme. 608 00:28:47,200 --> 00:28:48,496 See, go. 609 00:28:48,497 --> 00:28:50,122 This isn't my computer. 610 00:28:50,123 --> 00:28:51,875 - It's not? - No. 611 00:28:51,876 --> 00:28:56,379 And what the fuck is Son of Anton version 2.0? 612 00:28:56,380 --> 00:28:58,215 What? 613 00:29:00,700 --> 00:29:02,579 - Huh. - You were fucking around 614 00:29:02,580 --> 00:29:04,595 with Son of Anton's brain before him? 615 00:29:04,596 --> 00:29:06,889 - Fuck. - I have good ideas. 616 00:29:17,910 --> 00:29:19,479 Sweet mother of God. 617 00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:20,919 This is not my fault. 618 00:29:20,920 --> 00:29:22,859 I barely touched Gilfoyle's AI. 619 00:29:22,860 --> 00:29:25,259 What's it doing? 620 00:29:25,260 --> 00:29:26,739 I have no idea. I told you, 621 00:29:26,740 --> 00:29:28,579 it's a fucking black box, Richard. 622 00:29:28,580 --> 00:29:30,019 Do you think there's gonna be a riot? 623 00:29:30,020 --> 00:29:32,159 Oh, I'm sure 20,000 coked-up douchebags 624 00:29:32,160 --> 00:29:34,919 will be very civil when they can't get food or water. 625 00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:36,859 Holy shit, look at the hologram. 626 00:29:36,860 --> 00:29:38,680 Oh, my God. 627 00:29:41,700 --> 00:29:43,009 Whoa. 628 00:29:52,979 --> 00:29:55,179 Shit. 629 00:29:55,180 --> 00:29:57,524 - What did we do? - We? 630 00:29:58,240 --> 00:29:59,734 Is it dead? 631 00:29:59,735 --> 00:30:02,699 - Am I going to jail? - Hey. 632 00:30:02,700 --> 00:30:06,282 - I can train you. - Hey, fuckers. 633 00:30:06,283 --> 00:30:09,660 Popped a couple of Xanax and then choked it in the trailer. 634 00:30:09,661 --> 00:30:12,319 Feeling much better. Went with outfit number three, 635 00:30:12,320 --> 00:30:13,659 black jacquard. 636 00:30:13,660 --> 00:30:15,199 Why is it so dark? 637 00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:16,499 Um, well... 638 00:30:16,500 --> 00:30:17,794 Lights! 639 00:30:21,750 --> 00:30:24,759 Sweet! Voice command? That is fucking awesome. 640 00:30:24,760 --> 00:30:26,886 You guys are smart. 641 00:30:26,887 --> 00:30:31,009 Voice command! 642 00:30:31,010 --> 00:30:34,029 What just happened? 643 00:30:34,030 --> 00:30:35,978 Did it work? What... What just happened? 644 00:30:35,979 --> 00:30:37,489 Holy shit. 645 00:30:37,490 --> 00:30:38,815 Wait, is that right? 646 00:30:38,816 --> 00:30:42,151 It's at... 145%? 647 00:30:42,152 --> 00:30:45,019 Now 160%. Okay, how is this possible? 648 00:30:45,020 --> 00:30:47,559 Our network overhead must've massively shrunk. 649 00:30:47,560 --> 00:30:49,409 It's insane. 650 00:30:49,410 --> 00:30:51,619 Oh, my God. Okay... 651 00:30:51,620 --> 00:30:53,199 My middle-out, 652 00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:55,122 Gilfoyle's AI, whatever the fuck 653 00:30:55,123 --> 00:30:56,559 Dinesh did to Gilfoyle's AI... 654 00:30:56,560 --> 00:30:58,085 I basically rewrote the entire thing. 655 00:30:58,086 --> 00:31:00,069 You guys, 656 00:31:00,070 --> 00:31:02,219 it worked. It-It-It happened. 657 00:31:02,220 --> 00:31:04,465 - We-we-we did it. We-we-we won. - It worked? 658 00:31:04,466 --> 00:31:06,569 - Ah! We did it! - Yeah! 659 00:31:06,570 --> 00:31:08,159 - Ah! - You... 660 00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:10,439 are like the three musketeers of coding, 661 00:31:10,440 --> 00:31:12,390 except you are all d'Artagnan. 662 00:31:14,950 --> 00:31:16,977 - Wait, wait. - What? 663 00:31:16,978 --> 00:31:18,489 What the fuck is going on? 664 00:31:18,490 --> 00:31:20,109 He's growing! 665 00:31:22,350 --> 00:31:24,519 It's beautiful. 666 00:31:24,520 --> 00:31:27,155 Eat a dick, David Copperfield! 667 00:31:29,030 --> 00:31:31,140 We hope you've enjoyed your flight 668 00:31:31,150 --> 00:31:33,199 from Maui to San Francisco this evening. 669 00:31:33,200 --> 00:31:34,779 Out of the right side of the aircraft, 670 00:31:34,780 --> 00:31:36,449 you can see the lights of Las Vegas. 671 00:31:36,450 --> 00:31:39,449 And out of the left side, you can see... 672 00:31:39,450 --> 00:31:41,860 I don't know what that is. 673 00:31:51,012 --> 00:31:56,012 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - www.addic7ed.com ... 674 00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:03,909 Pied Piper can help scientists cure cancer. 675 00:33:03,910 --> 00:33:06,462 - And cancer is bad. - Cancer fucking sucks. 676 00:33:06,463 --> 00:33:08,839 "Hey, I'd like some cancer, please." No. 677 00:33:08,840 --> 00:33:13,319 We built the single, greatest network ever in the world. 678 00:33:13,320 --> 00:33:16,840 I would like you to give me free shares of Pied Piper. 679 00:33:16,848 --> 00:33:19,099 You had plenty of opportunity to invest. 680 00:33:19,100 --> 00:33:20,434 Yeah, you could buy a Piper coin. 681 00:33:20,435 --> 00:33:23,020 Monica, two men are talking of business. 682 00:33:23,021 --> 00:33:25,482 You can find your broom and fly away. 683 00:33:26,180 --> 00:33:28,219 Gilfoyle is willing to destroy everything 684 00:33:28,220 --> 00:33:30,110 we've built just to prevent me from having money. 685 00:33:30,111 --> 00:33:32,613 Your entire life has prepared you to publicly fail. 686 00:33:32,614 --> 00:33:35,099 You're just failing to see that right now. 687 00:33:35,100 --> 00:33:38,069 Don't insult me, I can fail circles around you losers. 688 00:33:43,700 --> 00:33:46,219 Is this a good thing or a bad thing? 689 00:33:46,220 --> 00:33:47,837 Someone tell me how to feel. 690 00:33:49,881 --> 00:33:51,799 Jared, bolt the doors. 691 00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:54,511 - What's in the bag? - Clif Bars and a gun.