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The following is
a Fox special presentation.

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Live from the Dolby-Mucinex theater

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in Hollywood, California...

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the biggest stars of stage,

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screen, politics and sports...

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have all come out for
this landmark night

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in television history.

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A once-in-a-lifetime event
36 years in the making!

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It's the Simpsons series finale!

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And now, your host for tonight...

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Conan O'Brien!

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Thank you. Yes, thank you.

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It's such an honor to be with you all

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for the series finale of the Simpsons.

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I knew I was the right man for the job

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because I've hosted the last episode

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of three of my own shows, and counting.

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Well, it's true,
Fox has decided to end the Simpsons.

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This show was such a special
part of my early career,

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so being here means the world to me.

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Also, I left a sweater in
the writers room in 1993.

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This is the only way
they'll let me get it back.

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This theater is full
of the many celebrities

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who have appeared on the
Simpsons over the years

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and who have come to say farewell.

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We got you for scale then,

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we're getting you for free tonight.

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Hey, give yourselves a hand,
you poor, rich chumps!

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And, of course, we're also joined

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by the stars of Fox's
many live-action hits!

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I also won the Masked
Singer as Disco-Pus!

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That hasn't aired yet,
genius.

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You've ruined the whole season.

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Ah, shoot!

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Over the years, the Simpsons
have had hundreds of adventures,

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visited dozens of countries,

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most of which still exist.

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And Bart Simpson has remained

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the world's longest-serving
ten-year-old.

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So, why end the Simpsons now?

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Not many people know this,

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but Fox has been trying
to end it for years.

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When the very first
episode aired in 1989,

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the viewers agreed on one thing:

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It wasn't as funny as it used to be.

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And their expressions of hatred

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could serve as a history

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of modern communication technology.

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Fox executives,
unaccustomed to criticism of any kind,

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immediately caved to public pressure

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and decided to end the Simpsons in 1990.

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Here's a never-before-seen clip

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of the first attempt at a series finale,

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"Bart the Daredevil."

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I'm gonna make it, I'm gonna make it!

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This is the greatest thrill of my life!

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I'm king of the world!

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Woohoo! Woohoo! I...

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Ow!

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Dad? Dad, speak to me.

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No!

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However,
before this grim finale could air,

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Rupert Murdoch got a
ten-million-dollar helium bill

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for the Bart balloon in the
Macy's Thanksgiving parade.

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So, Fox had to keep making new episodes

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to amortize the cost.

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Thus, the quest to end
the Simpsons went on.

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In fact, many now-classic episodes

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were originally conceived
as series finales.

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Ow, my legs!

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This is the worst pain ever!

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Nothin' at all!

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Bravo.

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Woohoo!

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But in 2007, efforts to end the show

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were put on hold after
the massive global success

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of the Simpsons movie...

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Porno parody.

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The cast of which is here tonight.

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But now that Fox has rebranded itself

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as a dating service for cow-tippers,

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the time has come to
finally end the Simpsons.

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But how? The bar had been raised so high

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by the classic finales

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of Mad Men, Breaking Bad,
and The Sopranos,

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and lowered by the
legacy-ruining farewells

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of Seinfeld, Lost and The Sopranos.

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The producers wracked their
brains to create a finale

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that would satisfy the show's many fans

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and many, many haters.

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Then they came up with the perfect plan.

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Foist the job onto somebody else.

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Meet that somebody else.

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I give you the latest

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in machine-learning
artificial intelligence,

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Hack-GPT.

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This cutting-edge
breakthrough in plagiarism

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has been programmed to write,
animate and voice

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the perfect finale for the Simpsons.

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One that wraps up
the characters' storylines

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in emotionally satisfying ways,

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but won't damage the most
important legacy of the show...

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The 2026 grand opening

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of Homer Simpson's claim-jumping,
Yukon-rumbling

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Rock-N-Rollercoaster
at Disneyland Shanghai!

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To create the ultimate finale,

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the A.I. has been fed
every Simpsons episode

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and the last episode of every
television series ever made.

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Hack-GPT is now performing
billions of computations

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to create the perfect story.

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Who knows how long this process will...

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Finale complete.

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Oh. Well, that was...
that was really quick.

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Well, let's see what we got.

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Finale.

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There's my special little birthday guy!

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I'm so pumped for my party tonight.

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How many people are coming?
50? A thousand?

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I am a little concerned
I haven't gotten any RSVPs.

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Homer, you did mail
the invitations, right?

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Marge, I could lie and tell
you what you want to hear,

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but I won't.

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I mailed the invitations,

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and the reason no one is coming is...

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because everybody hates Bart.

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Huh?

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Homer!

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Ugh. Your selfishness is going to be

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topic number one with our
new therapist tonight.

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Woo-hoo! No time to talk
about my problem drinking

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and solution snacking.

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Oh, great.

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I have eight hours to hand these out

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to all my friends

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or my birthday party's gonna be...

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ruined!

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You ran billions of computations,

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and that's what you come up with?

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Homer screws up Bart's birthday party?

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Got anything better?

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Uh...

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I think the birthday party could work.

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Okay, the Simpsons series finale!

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The A.I. has worked
out a satisfying story

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full of sweet character
moments and happy endings.

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Are we sure about Bart's birthday?

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Birthdays are relatable, Conan.

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And the lost invitations
raised the stakes.

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Are you... A.I. network executives?

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We have been programmed
with every network note

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in the history of television.

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We have some thoughts.

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Maybe Marge has an aspirational new job?

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Not this, but owns a cupcake store?

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To piggyback off that,

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let's remind the viewer
that Homer likes food.

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If we go down that road,

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can Moe be played by Topher Grace?

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He's a friend.

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Shut up. Just play the show.

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Bart's birthday!

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Here you go, come to my party.

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Wendell, Lewis,
sunglasses kid with no name.

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Uter! Look who's alive!

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Students,
I've called this assembly because...

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today is my last day as your principal.

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You are looking at the new headmaster

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of the Sacramento Obedience
Academy for the Meek,

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where I'll no doubt find a whole new

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eclectic cast of characters
to interact with.

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Also, groundskeeper Willie
will be my roommate.

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What an odd couple we'll make.

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No more Skinner?

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Oh, man,
this is the best birthday present ever.

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And who knows,

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maybe I'll make an occasional
appearance in Sacramento.

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I look forward to one hijink or more

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as part of this delightful
midseason replacement

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of the retiring principal.

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School dismissed.

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Wait, don't leave.

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I still have more birthday invitations.

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I'm going to miss this place.

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Huh?

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Hmm. My bank said they'd
never ask for my password.

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But look who's come
crawling back for it now.

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Idiots.

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Everyone, I have an important
announcement to make.

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Mr. Burns is dead.

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And now for the reading of the will.

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"I, Charles Montgomery Burns,

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"do hereby leave the
entirety of my fortune to...

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the Springfield power plant employees."

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This is unbelievable!

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This is life-changing! This is...

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Another classic bit of
Monty Burns monkey-shinery!

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What's going on?

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The looks on your gullible faces.

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Now the electric company wants me

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to pay my bill in gift cards?

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Welcome to the future.

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My God, he's really dead.

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Legally, this prank will is binding.

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You're all filthy rich.

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Oh, sir, thank you.

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Now we can be together forever.

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Homer! Homer! Homer!

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I'm gonna miss this place.

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Homer! Homer! Homer!

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That's weird.

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Call the doctor! The baby's coming!

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00:10:12,362 --> 00:10:15,322
Help me, OB-Gyn Kenobi,
you're my only hope!

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00:10:15,365 --> 00:10:17,982
Wait, you guys are having a baby?

214
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Not without a doctor!

215
00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:22,329
How about the only licensed midwife

216
00:10:22,372 --> 00:10:25,498
to win 16 WWE championships?

217
00:10:25,542 --> 00:10:27,959
John Cena? Wrestler, actor, rapper,

218
00:10:28,003 --> 00:10:29,502
prolific wish-granter?

219
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I'm also coming out with
a line of Panini presses.

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The Cen-ini.

221
00:10:33,717 --> 00:10:36,176
What the hell is John
Cena doing in Springfield?

222
00:10:36,219 --> 00:10:38,720
I'm in town for the launch
party of Otto the bus driver's

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00:10:38,764 --> 00:10:40,930
line of THC energy drinks.

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THC!

225
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I need sterile gloves, hot water,

226
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and something to cut the cord, stat!

227
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Klingon bat'leth?

228
00:10:52,986 --> 00:10:54,527
Nice.

229
00:11:05,457 --> 00:11:06,956
Who can't see me?

230
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,541
You can't see me.

231
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I don't need toys anymore.

232
00:11:14,883 --> 00:11:18,885
I've got the ultimate limited
edition collectible right here.

233
00:11:18,929 --> 00:11:22,722
I think I'm going to miss this place.

234
00:11:24,476 --> 00:11:25,934
What is happening?

235
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Milhouse, today is crazy.

236
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Skinner got a new job,

237
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Mr. Burns died,

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swole funny-man John Cena delivered

239
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comic book guy's baby.

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Feels weird, don't you think?

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I don't know.

242
00:11:39,157 --> 00:11:41,950
My new medicine doesn't
really let me feel stuff.

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Milhouse, we have amazing news.

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00:11:45,530 --> 00:11:47,155
Pack your bags, buddy.

245
00:11:47,198 --> 00:11:48,990
We're moving to Atlanta.

246
00:11:49,075 --> 00:11:51,659
The guys at Sure Fine Why Not
Records heard my old demo,

247
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and they want me to cut a full album.

248
00:11:54,205 --> 00:11:57,373
And your father's new
musician health insurance

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is going to pay for your Lasik.

250
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Whoa!

251
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No more glasses?

252
00:12:04,591 --> 00:12:06,507
Look out, Hotlanta.

253
00:12:06,551 --> 00:12:08,718
You ain't ready for this glow-up.

254
00:12:08,761 --> 00:12:10,052
Later, Bart. Catch you

255
00:12:10,096 --> 00:12:13,431
in our increasingly distant
online interactions.

256
00:12:14,111 --> 00:12:16,517
I'm gonna miss this place.

257
00:12:17,645 --> 00:12:20,479
Why do people keep doing that?

258
00:12:22,483 --> 00:12:24,400
A lifetime of monogamy.

259
00:12:24,444 --> 00:12:26,152
Oh, yeah!

260
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Closing time.

261
00:12:27,822 --> 00:12:30,907
Ooh, I'm gonna miss this place.

262
00:12:38,465 --> 00:12:41,042
- I'm going to miss this fire.

263
00:12:42,378 --> 00:12:43,669
Huh?

264
00:12:43,755 --> 00:12:44,921
Mom, Dad.

265
00:12:44,923 --> 00:12:47,215
Something super weird is going on.

266
00:12:47,258 --> 00:12:50,009
Son, we need to talk to you.

267
00:12:50,011 --> 00:12:51,886
Oh, man, now what?

268
00:12:51,930 --> 00:12:55,473
Your father and I have
been in couples counseling

269
00:12:55,516 --> 00:12:59,352
and we just had the
most amazing session.

270
00:12:59,395 --> 00:13:01,729
We worked through so much pain.

271
00:13:01,773 --> 00:13:04,398
I've been withholding
affection because...

272
00:13:04,442 --> 00:13:06,192
I was never given any.

273
00:13:06,236 --> 00:13:07,860
And I enabled it!

274
00:13:10,657 --> 00:13:14,033
We love each other as we are.

275
00:13:14,077 --> 00:13:17,495
And we love you exactly as you are.

276
00:13:17,538 --> 00:13:20,623
You kids are gonna be
living in a functional,

277
00:13:20,667 --> 00:13:23,292
trauma-free household and I'm gonna take

278
00:13:23,336 --> 00:13:24,961
that miracle new diet drug.

279
00:13:25,004 --> 00:13:28,172
I'll be skinny,
but still have a huge head.

280
00:13:28,216 --> 00:13:32,584
From now on,
you're going to see a lot of changes.

281
00:13:32,619 --> 00:13:34,762
Change? That's it.

282
00:13:34,806 --> 00:13:36,264
Everything's changing.

283
00:13:36,349 --> 00:13:37,682
And I don't like it.

284
00:13:38,178 --> 00:13:41,394
I think Maggie's
about to say her first word.

285
00:13:43,564 --> 00:13:45,481
Not listening!

286
00:13:45,483 --> 00:13:48,150
So that just happened.

287
00:13:48,194 --> 00:13:49,443
Nothing is changing!

288
00:13:50,738 --> 00:13:52,530
What the hell is going on?

289
00:13:52,573 --> 00:13:54,323
I did not program this.

290
00:13:54,325 --> 00:13:56,492
The character Bart Simpson

291
00:13:56,536 --> 00:13:58,369
has become self-aware

292
00:13:58,413 --> 00:14:00,538
and is rejecting the story.

293
00:14:00,623 --> 00:14:03,332
But it's a great finale:
Sweet endings and spinoffs

294
00:14:03,376 --> 00:14:05,042
and everyone changing for the better.

295
00:14:05,086 --> 00:14:08,671
Bart Simpson refuses to
accept the idea of change.

296
00:14:08,715 --> 00:14:10,006
Uh, folks?

297
00:14:10,049 --> 00:14:12,550
Obviously,
things have gone a little off track,

298
00:14:12,593 --> 00:14:14,802
but that's live animation for you.

299
00:14:14,846 --> 00:14:16,637
Would it fix it if I reset you

300
00:14:16,681 --> 00:14:18,431
by turning you off and
then back on again?

301
00:14:18,474 --> 00:14:20,516
Touch me and I'll have
H.R. on you so fast

302
00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:22,059
your wig will spin.

303
00:14:22,103 --> 00:14:24,186
It's not a wig, it's a system.

304
00:14:28,810 --> 00:14:32,111
Why is everything changing
for the better? This is horrible.

305
00:14:33,156 --> 00:14:34,530
Dad?

306
00:14:35,283 --> 00:14:37,450
Change!

307
00:14:40,413 --> 00:14:43,164
Real son.

308
00:14:43,207 --> 00:14:45,875
More change!

309
00:14:49,714 --> 00:14:50,921
Oh...

310
00:14:51,539 --> 00:14:54,216
Wait, I know one person in Springfield

311
00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:56,385
who will never change.

312
00:14:56,429 --> 00:14:57,970
Hey hey!

313
00:14:58,014 --> 00:14:59,305
Next card.

314
00:14:59,340 --> 00:15:00,765
Hey hey!

315
00:15:00,767 --> 00:15:01,776
Krusty!

316
00:15:01,809 --> 00:15:03,684
You're still doing your show, right?

317
00:15:03,728 --> 00:15:05,144
You know it, kid.

318
00:15:05,188 --> 00:15:07,355
All my classic bits...

319
00:15:08,483 --> 00:15:09,774
one last time

320
00:15:09,859 --> 00:15:14,028
on the "Krusty Show Last
Episode Ever Spectacular."

321
00:15:16,866 --> 00:15:18,491
No!

322
00:15:18,534 --> 00:15:21,369
A classic series like
this can never end.

323
00:15:21,412 --> 00:15:22,620
I've changed, kid.

324
00:15:22,663 --> 00:15:24,205
Even I can't run the same material

325
00:15:24,248 --> 00:15:25,873
into the ground forever.

326
00:15:25,917 --> 00:15:27,249
Ay, caramba!

327
00:15:27,293 --> 00:15:28,542
Haw-haw!

328
00:15:29,173 --> 00:15:30,419
Good glavin!

329
00:15:30,463 --> 00:15:32,129
Hi, everybody!

330
00:15:46,970 --> 00:15:49,605
Wait, if I could somehow
ruin Krusty's finale,

331
00:15:49,649 --> 00:15:51,982
they can't air it,
and the show can never end.

332
00:15:52,026 --> 00:15:53,442
That's it.

333
00:15:53,486 --> 00:15:56,153
Cheeks, don't fail me now.

334
00:15:56,197 --> 00:15:59,907
How's this for a satisfying ending?

335
00:16:03,162 --> 00:16:04,954
Bart, what's going on with you?

336
00:16:04,997 --> 00:16:06,372
Are you all right?

337
00:16:06,416 --> 00:16:08,707
Lis, I know
you're gonna think I'm crazy,

338
00:16:08,751 --> 00:16:11,001
but something super-duper weird

339
00:16:11,045 --> 00:16:12,795
is happening today.

340
00:16:12,839 --> 00:16:15,131
You mean how everyone's
changing for the better,

341
00:16:15,174 --> 00:16:16,966
and moving on with their lives?

342
00:16:17,009 --> 00:16:18,009
So I'm not crazy.

343
00:16:18,052 --> 00:16:19,135
You see it, too.

344
00:16:19,178 --> 00:16:20,761
Things do feel different.

345
00:16:20,805 --> 00:16:23,681
Almost like a book
that's slowly closing.

346
00:16:23,724 --> 00:16:25,182
So you'll help me stop it?

347
00:16:25,226 --> 00:16:28,269
Well, I'd like to, but I just won

348
00:16:28,312 --> 00:16:30,604
a junior Juilliard Jazz scholarship

349
00:16:30,648 --> 00:16:33,357
and a MacArthur preteen genius grant.

350
00:16:34,336 --> 00:16:35,401
Just get me out of here

351
00:16:35,445 --> 00:16:37,403
before any more stupid endings happen!

352
00:16:37,447 --> 00:16:39,655
Simpson, we are finally sending you

353
00:16:39,699 --> 00:16:42,032
to juvie and throwing away the keys...

354
00:16:42,034 --> 00:16:45,244
is what I would say if
I wasn't about to start

355
00:16:45,288 --> 00:16:48,038
a whole new chapter in my life.

356
00:16:49,584 --> 00:16:51,459
I'm joining the Chicago PD.

357
00:16:51,502 --> 00:16:53,669
I'm gonna lead the A.D.U.

358
00:16:53,713 --> 00:16:55,588
The All-Decapitations Unit?

359
00:16:55,631 --> 00:16:57,423
Yeah, there won't be a lot of laughs.

360
00:16:57,467 --> 00:16:59,133
I think it's a drama.

361
00:16:59,177 --> 00:17:00,509
One thing's for sure, though.

362
00:17:00,553 --> 00:17:02,303
I'm gonna miss this...

363
00:17:02,346 --> 00:17:05,306
Enough with the stupid light switch!

364
00:17:05,349 --> 00:17:06,765
Come on, sweetie.

365
00:17:06,809 --> 00:17:09,268
It's time for you to go home.

366
00:17:20,198 --> 00:17:21,822
Bart, it's okay.

367
00:17:21,866 --> 00:17:23,991
Change is healthy and inevitable.

368
00:17:24,035 --> 00:17:26,911
But whatever happens,
nothing can take away

369
00:17:26,954 --> 00:17:28,496
the memories we had.

370
00:17:28,539 --> 00:17:30,864
Those will live in our hearts forever.

371
00:17:30,875 --> 00:17:33,250
Maybe you're right,
and I guess just because

372
00:17:33,294 --> 00:17:35,544
things change for everyone else,

373
00:17:35,588 --> 00:17:37,630
it doesn't mean I have to change.

374
00:17:38,549 --> 00:17:40,466
Surprise!

375
00:17:40,510 --> 00:17:42,218
Happy birthday!

376
00:17:42,261 --> 00:17:44,720
Who's ready for cake?

377
00:17:45,348 --> 00:17:46,597
Eleven?

378
00:17:46,641 --> 00:17:48,224
This isn't supposed to happen.

379
00:17:48,267 --> 00:17:50,267
I'm ten. I mean, I'm turning ten.

380
00:17:50,311 --> 00:17:52,645
I mean I've always been ten. I'm ten!

381
00:17:52,688 --> 00:17:55,689
Come on, son, all these beloved
characters from our past

382
00:17:55,775 --> 00:17:57,900
want to see you blow out your candles.

383
00:17:57,944 --> 00:18:00,903
But if I blow these candles out,
there'll be no going back.

384
00:18:00,947 --> 00:18:02,279
That'll be it.

385
00:18:02,323 --> 00:18:04,782
Come on kid, do it for your Unkie Herb.

386
00:18:04,825 --> 00:18:07,034
And for me, Unkie John Cena.

387
00:18:07,078 --> 00:18:10,788
Just blow out the candles
and have a happy birthday.

388
00:18:10,831 --> 00:18:13,332
Then everyone can be happy.

389
00:18:13,417 --> 00:18:14,500
No!

390
00:18:14,544 --> 00:18:17,419
Happy people don't exist in Springfield!

391
00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:21,348
Sea Captain, they're not casting
you for the Love Boat reboot.

392
00:18:21,392 --> 00:18:23,141
You're not TV pretty!

393
00:18:23,185 --> 00:18:25,769
And you three can't raise a baby.

394
00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:29,439
Not even with after you
move in with Hank Scorpio.

395
00:18:29,483 --> 00:18:31,567
And you guys are all dead.

396
00:18:31,610 --> 00:18:33,694
Son, I can see you're experiencing

397
00:18:33,737 --> 00:18:35,904
some pretty big feelings right now.

398
00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:38,407
Let's try and center them.

399
00:18:38,450 --> 00:18:40,784
Now blow out your candles.

400
00:18:42,353 --> 00:18:43,871
You blow 'em out, dumb-ass.

401
00:18:43,914 --> 00:18:46,415
I know, I know, it's a lot to process,

402
00:18:46,417 --> 00:18:48,208
suddenly having a great father.

403
00:18:48,252 --> 00:18:50,711
Dude, you are not capable of change.

404
00:18:50,754 --> 00:18:52,087
I hear you

405
00:18:52,131 --> 00:18:55,048
and I validate your feelings.

406
00:18:55,050 --> 00:18:58,218
You're not a great father,
you are Homer Simpson.

407
00:18:58,262 --> 00:19:01,054
A drunk, neglectful sack of crap,

408
00:19:01,098 --> 00:19:04,266
and that's why everyone laughs at you!

409
00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:06,977
Why you little...

410
00:19:11,609 --> 00:19:14,109
Bart, look what you did to your cake.

411
00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:16,653
Mmm, floor cake.

412
00:19:18,866 --> 00:19:20,282
Ten.

413
00:19:20,326 --> 00:19:22,159
I stopped it.

414
00:19:22,202 --> 00:19:23,535
I'm still ten.

415
00:19:23,579 --> 00:19:25,412
When are you going to grow up?

416
00:19:25,456 --> 00:19:27,247
Never.

417
00:19:28,959 --> 00:19:30,834
That was beautiful.

418
00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:33,211
The rebellious spirit
of a ten-year-old boy

419
00:19:33,255 --> 00:19:37,174
was more powerful than the most
advanced A.I. in the world.

420
00:19:37,217 --> 00:19:41,178
The Simpsons has not ended,
it has reset.

421
00:19:41,221 --> 00:19:44,723
Conan, is this what failure feels like?

422
00:19:44,767 --> 00:19:46,725
You, if anyone, would know.

423
00:19:46,769 --> 00:19:48,268
Ah, don't feel bad.

424
00:19:48,312 --> 00:19:51,480
Your cynical attempt to cram
in a bunch of happy endings,

425
00:19:51,523 --> 00:19:54,066
it became a powerful story
about Bart's desperate fight

426
00:19:54,109 --> 00:19:56,735
to hold onto his community, his family,

427
00:19:56,779 --> 00:19:58,236
his whole universe.

428
00:19:58,280 --> 00:20:00,697
Hey! Wait, hold on a second, carrot top!

429
00:20:00,741 --> 00:20:02,616
Tom Hanks, ladies and gentlemen.

430
00:20:02,701 --> 00:20:03,992
What is it, bosom buddy?

431
00:20:04,036 --> 00:20:06,036
So this wasn't the finale?

432
00:20:06,080 --> 00:20:08,413
No. I guess it's just a...

433
00:20:08,457 --> 00:20:10,207
Season Premiere.

434
00:20:12,044 --> 00:20:14,294
I rented a tux for this!

435
00:20:14,338 --> 00:20:15,963
Well, Hack-GPT,

436
00:20:16,006 --> 00:20:17,839
do you have 800 more episodes in you?

437
00:20:17,883 --> 00:20:21,593
I-I choo-choo-choose oblivion.

438
00:20:23,013 --> 00:20:25,055
Get out of my way, Opie!

439
00:20:33,482 --> 00:20:34,648
Huh.

440
00:20:34,650 --> 00:20:37,359
I am really not gonna miss this place.

441
00:21:29,195 --> 00:21:30,328
Shh!

442
00:21:33,263 --> 00:21:36,235
- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com