We join Bikini Bottom's noblest, boldest... oldest superheroes
as they bravely prepare for vacation.
But wait!
While our heroes relax at Leisure Village
who will watch the Mermalair?
ManSponge!
And BoyPatrick!
Reporting for duty!
Yeah, yeah, follow me.
Up, up and away!
Evil!
Now, we want you boys
to keep an eye on the place.
Water the plants and make sure...
Oh, my gosh, Patrick!
This is the greatest wall
of superhero secret gadgetry ever!
I get the Cosmic Ray!
I get the Aquaglove!
Hold on there, boys!
You cannot play with this stuff.
What about the Orb of Confusion?
No, no!
Prolonged exposure to the Orb of Confusion
will give you... confusion!
What about the Invisible Boatmobile?
Especially not the Invisible Boatmobile!
When we say, "Don't touch anything"
we mean, "Don't touch anything!"
Do you understand?
Loud and clear, trusted boy companion!
Ah, great.
Here are the keys.
We'll see you in a week.
Up, up and away!
Come, BoyPatrick.
While our heroes are away, we will keep evil at bay!
Huh?
Ma-ma-ma-ma-ma...
What is it, trusted sidekick?
Ma-ma-ma-ma, ma-ma-ma-ma-ma...
Ma-ma-ma-ma, ma-ma-ma-ma-ma!
Man Ray!
Hey, SpongeBob, how come he's not chasing us?
Looks like he's frozen.
Fr-fr-fr, fro-fro-fro...
It appears to be some sort of prison chamber...
made out of frozen tartar sauce.
This is incredible!
Next to the Dirty Bubble
the evil Man Ray is the all-time greatest arch-nemesis
of Mermaidman and Barnacleboy!
I have so many questions to ask him.
We're not supposed to touch anything!
But you said you had a question.
We could get in trouble!
He said not to touch anything!
And that includes unfreezing a supervillain!
I'm free!
Uh, actually, Mr. uh... Man Ray, sir
only your head is free.
By the supreme authority of wickedness
I, the evil Man Ray, command you to release me
from this frozen prison at once!
Well, uh, Mr. evil Man Ray, sir, we can't do that.
Why... not?
Because you're evil!
You mean, if I was good, then you'd let me go?
Yeah, sure, why not?
Then, uh... in that case, I am good.
Really?
Yes, really.
Really, really?
Yes, yes, really, really.
Really, really, really?
Yes, yes, already, I'm good, I'm good!
Not let me out of here
or you'll suffer dire consequences!
Well, that's good enough for me.
You fools!
Prepare to be eradicated!
Ah, ooh...
What's wrong with me?
What is this infernal contraption?
Don't play dumb, Man Ray—
you know that's the Tickle Belt
Mermaidman used on you in episode number 17!
As seen in episode 17!
Oh, I love that episode.
Oh, me, too, me, too.
I'll never get out of here wearing this belt!
I need an evil plan that will trick them to take it off me.
Time for those acting lessons to pay off.
Remember that part when Mermaidman...
Oh, sob, oh, cry!
Oh, woe is me!
You don't know what it's like being evil for so long.
Oh, how I wish to be... good.
If only some kind heroes would show me the path to decency.
We could teach you how to be good
and then we'll let you go!
Ah, that would be fantastic!
I'll fake my way through this
just like I did in high school.
Okay, Man Ray, are you ready
for your first day at goodness school?
Pat, get your wallet out.
Okay, goodness lesson number one:
You see someone drop their wallet.
Patrick, drop the wallet.
Now, what would you do?
Excuse me, sir
but I do believe you've dropped your wallet.
Doesn't look familiar to me.
What?
I just saw you drop it— here.
Nope, it's not mine.
It is yours.
I... I'm trying to be a good person
and return it to you.
Return what to who?
Aren't you... Patrick Star?
Yup.
And this is your I.D.?
Yup.I found this I.D.
in this wallet
and if that's the case, this must be your wallet.
That makes sense to me.
Then take it.
It's not my wallet.
Oh, you dim bulb!
Take back your wallet or I'll rip your arms off!
Uh-uh, wrong...
Good people don't rip
other people's arms off.
Oh, oh, stop!
Okay, goodness lesson number two.
You see someone struggling with a heavy package.
What do you do?
Hello, friend.
I noticed you were struggling with that package.
Would you like some help?
Ow!
Oops.
Sorry, can I start over?
I noticed you were...
Ow!
Oops, got to start again.
You butter-fingered pink thing!
What's in that box, anyhow?
My wallets.
Oh, SpongeBob, tickle him!
Ah, that tickles, but it's worth it!
All right, goodness lesson number three.
Uh... let's see...
I've got one.
I'm thinking of a number between one and 100.
What is it?
Um... 62?
Wrong!
Stop, stop...
Hey, Patrick
that's not about being good.
Let go of it, SpongeBob!
Pat, we can use it only when he's bad.
Let go!
Frequency rising...
belt out of control...
Tickling my DNA...
Make it stop!
Please!
Did you hear that, Patrick?
He said the "p" word.
Peanuts?
No, "please."
Well, that's good enough for me.
I guess he's reconstituted.
Rehabilitated.
Gesundheit.
It's graduation day, Man Ray!
This is the key to your future.
Just look at him, Patrick, the picture of goodness.
We're not supposed to touch that.
Or that, either.
We are really not supposed to touch those, sir.
Good people have
no use for weapons...
The only thing I'm good at is being evil.
So long, suckers!
What's that smell, SpongeBob?
That, Patrick, is the smell of defeat.
Good, I thought it was my skin.
Forget about your skin, Patrick!
Man Ray is still bad and someone has to stop him.
This is a job for Mermaidman...
And Barnacleboy!
To the Invisible Boatmobile!
Ignition... on!
Wait— I don't have a license!
Well, this is an invisible boat, right?
So you need an invisible license!
You're the best sidekick ever, Barnacleboy.
Thank goodness for invisible seat belts!
Out of my way, fools.
You no longer have control of me
and now this town belongs to Man Ray!
Not so fast, arch villain.
We still have the Orb of Confusion.
Take this!
Well, that was easy.
All right, people!
Everybody stand right where you are.
I want you to, uh...
No, no, stop giggling, or I'll have to...
Stop laughing, you fools!
What can I do for you, sir?
I'll tell you what you can do!
Give me all of your, uh...
Give me, give me all of your...
Give me...
Ah! The belt is gone, but I still feel its tickle.
The urge to do bad is gone!
I guess I'll just open a checking account.
Man Ray!
No need to be alarmed, SpongeBob.
Your teachings have transformed me.
Besides... I have checks with little poodles on them!
I won't be needing this anymore.
Farewell, fellow do-gooder.
Bye, Man Ray!
Wow, we did it—
just like the real Mermaidman and Barnacleboy!
We saved the day!
Isn't it incredible, Patrick?
Patrick?
Patrick, you know
that thing's turned off, right?
Patrick, yoo-hoo, Patrick?
Okay, everybody settle down.
Welcome to the Komedy Krab!
Now, please give a warm welcome to our first comic
the indiscernible Doogie Williams.
Good evening, folks.
I'm going to skip the jokes
and get right to the part where I throw pies at you.
I hope I do as good as that guy.
Man, those people will laugh at anything.
Hey, don't sweat it, kid.
I got 'em all warmed up for you.
Put your fins together for SpongeBob SquarePants!
Go get 'em, SpongeBob!
Whoo-hoo!
Hey, hey, hey, ladies and jellyfish
have you ever noticed salt shakers?
I mean, you fill them up every night at closing
and, I mean, where does it all go?
Huh? You know what I mean?
And tomatoes— what's the deal on those things?
Because, I mean
you chop them up into slices, but...
What are they, vegetables or...
fruit?
And what does that make ketchup?
Oh, brother!
This guy stinks!
Hey! Hey, funny guy!
I got a joke for you!
What smells rotten
and puts people to sleep?
Um, noxious gas?
No! Your act!
Did you ever notice how, uh, forks, uh...
Forks? Come on!
Quick, SpongeBob!
Make a witty observation!
P.U.
Did you ever notice how big squirrels' teeth are?
That's true.
Huh?
I mean, hey
you could land a plane on those things.
And what's up with that squirrel fur?
I guess fleas need a home, too.
Squirrel fur!
And they smell!
Uh, but hey, you'd stink, too
if you spent three months buried in dirt.
Why does it take more than one squirrel
to change a light bulb?
Why?
Because they're so darn stupid!
Oh, that's a good one, eh, Sandy?
Uh, y-yeah.
That was fantastic, boy!
You really knocked them out!
I think I'll do this joke night again
with you as the headliner!
I never thought I could be a headliner!
Whatever that is.
The headliner's the one
who cleans up after the show.
Well, at least I don't have to clean up my act!
Stick with the squirrel jokes, boy.
Now get busy!
Mops, mops, mops.
What's up with those things?
I mean, really!
Oh, hey, Sandy.
Howdy, SpongeBob.
Did you like the show?
Well, a-actually, SpongeBob, no.
Those jokes are hurtful and you know it.
Come on, Sandy.
I was just joking.
I mean, everybody knows
you're the smartest one at Bikini Bottom.
Well, I can't argue with that.
We all gotta laugh at ourselves once in a while.
I do it all the time!
You're right, SpongeBob.
I was being a little too sensitive.
No hard feelings.
Okay, deodorant.
Huh, let's see.
Roll-on or stick?
I think she should buy both.
Huh?
Hey, look, guys!
It's the stupid squirrel!
I know—
let's try and communicate with it.
Duh...
Hmph!
Hello, little critter.
What's your name?
Don't stand too close to a squirrel, Billy.
You'll catch its stupid.
Okay, Mom.
Stupidity isn't a virus
but it sure is spreading like one.
SpongeBob! SpongeBob!
Because they're stupid.
Hey, uh, SpongeBob?
Oh, hi, Sandy.
Um, I need to talk to you
about them squirrel jokes.
We already talked about that, remember?
SpongeBob, this is serious.
Since you've been telling them jokes
people have been treating me different.
SpongeBob, five minutes.
Hel-lo, Sandy.
Me Patrick.
Do you un-der-stand?
Squirrels.
Y-y-you see?
That's what I'm talking about.
That's just Patrick.
He's fooling around.
I'm just asking you as a friend
please lay off them squirrel jokes, okay?
Tell some of them other jokes you got.
Other jokes?
Bah!
I got a million of them.
Thanks, SpongeBob.
I knew you'd understand.
SpongeBob! SpongeBob! SpongeBob! SpongeBob!
Put your fins together for SpongeBob SquarePants!
Uh, hi.
Uh, did you hear about the goldfish who went bankrupt?
Now he's a bronze fish.
What?
I guess you heard that one.
I haven't heard it!
Good one, SpongeBob.
Thank you, you're too kind.
Hey, what about this water?
I mean, the stuff's everywhere.
Tell the one about the squirrel and the light bulbs!
Uh... hey, what about this thing?
Huh? Huh?
Get on with the squirrel jokes!
Squirrel jokes! Squirrel jokes! Squirrel jokes! Squirrel jokes!
Squirrel jokes!
What do I do? What do I do?
SpongeBob, you've got a choice to make:
Your friends or your career?
Squirrel jokes! Squirrel jokes!
Howdy, y'all!
How come it takes more than one squirrel
to screw in a light bulb?
Because they're so darn stupid!
My people!
Seriously, folks, I want to give
a special thanks to my friend Sandy.
Sandy, don't you see?
The crowd loves these jokes.
Am I right?
Don't you see, Sandy?
We're laughing with you, not at you.
Do you understand now, Sandy?
Huh? Do you?
I understand exactly what's going on, SpongeBob.
Great.
I knew sooner or later you'd get it.
What a great sport.
Let's give a big hand to Sandy!
But clap slow, because remember, she's a squirrel!
Thank you.
You've been a wonderful audience and, uh, good night.
Ah... another spectacular performance, SpongeBob.
Oh, what's this, a fan letter?
You did it, SpongeBob.
You get to keep your career and your friends.
I'm glad that Sandy can finally see the genius of my comedy.
Good morning, Sandy.
Well, how-dee!
Sandy, are you feeling all right?
I'm just being my au-naturally squirrely self.
Well, come on in.
Y'all must be tired
from telling them funny jokes all the time.
Why don't you take a load off?
Uh, Sandy, I think something's wrong with this seat.
Naw, I just done put glue on it so you wouldn't fall off.
Are them flowers for me?
You even done got me a vase.
But Sandy, that... that's not a...
Ain't that purdy?
Sandy, I need wa...
Oh, that's right.
You's a sea critter.
Now, what was that thing sea critters need?
Um... uh, let's see... sea critters need, uh...
Wa...
Oh, wait! Don't tell me.
I know this one.
Wa...
Wa... llet? Watch? Waffles?
Sandy!
Water!
Well, why didn't you just say so?
Here you go.
Yup, us squirrels sure is stupid.
Sandy!
Squirrels is dumb.
Sandy!
Okay, Sandy, I get it!
What's that?
You want more?
Okey-dokey.
More water for the sea critter.
Okay, Sandy, okay!
I get it!
No more squirrel jokes.
SpongeBob! SpongeBob!
Thank you, thank you very much.
On my way over here I ran into a squirrel
and I said, "Hey
"why don't you go get a couple squirrel friends
and we'll go change a light bulb?"
But seriously, folks, the only thing dumber than a squirrel
is a sponge!
I mean, we're so dumb, we don't even have a vertebrae!
Look at me!
I got no bones.
That's true.
Crabs? Oh, brother.
They're so cheap they can't even pay attention!
It's true! I am cheap!
Now let me tell you about those fish.
Boy, are they smelly.
Whoo-hoo!
How could a creature
who spends so much time in the water smell so bad?
I mean, really.
Soap, soap, what is soap?
And don't even get me started on starfish!
[Captioning sponsored by THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
and NICKELODEON]