OHH...
I JUST CAN'T DECIDE WHAT TO ORDER.
YOU ALREADY ORDERED.
DON'T RUSH ME, YOUNG LADY!
HURRY UP, SPONGEBOB!
WHAT IS TAKING YOU SO LONG?
I'M ADDING THE LOVE.
YOU'RE NOT BEING PAIDTO LOVE.
I'M NOT IN IT FOR THE MONEY.
I'LL ALWAYS TREASURE THIS TIME WE'VE HAD TOGETHER.
LOOK!
AWW...
WELL, I'LL BE COOKED IN BUTTER.
IT'S JIM, ME ORIGINAL FRY COOK.
KRABS!
THEJIM?
HE-WHO-FLIPPED-KRABBY-PATTIES IN THE BEFORE TIME?
YOU'RE DOING WELL, JIM.
IS, IS, IS THAT LIMO SOLID GOLD?
IT SURE IS.
I WAS ON MY WAY TO MY SOLID GOLD MANSION NEXT TO MY SOLID GOLD LAKE
WHEN I THOUGHT I'D TAKE A LITTLE TRIP DOWN MEMORY LANE.
GOOD OLD JIM.
WHEN YOU WORKED HERE, THE PLACE HAD CLASS.
YEAH, WHEN THIS PLACE HAD CLASS...
WE'VE HAD SOME GREAT TIMES, TOO, RIGHT, SQUIDWARD?
NO.
HEY, THAT'S NEW.
EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH, HUH?
THAT'S ME!
DON'T WORRY, JIM.
NO ONE COULD EVER TAKE YOUR PLACE.
THE ORIGINAL IS STILL UNDERNEATH.
YOUR "BEST EMPLOYEE EVER" AWARD.
SPONGEBOB, SWEEP UP THIS MESS WHILE JIM AND I CATCH UP.
YES, SIR.
AFTER I LEFT THE KRUSTY KRAB, I WORKED AT SOME OF THE FINEST RESTAURANTS AROUND THE WORLD.
I GOT SO SUCCESSFUL, I WAS ABLE TO RETIRE IN LUXURY.
WOULD YOU SIGN MY KRABBY PATTY?
OH, I DON'T SIGN WHAT I DIDN'T MAKE.
HEY, BIG SHOT, WHY DON'T YOU STEP BEHIND THE FRYER, FOR OLD TIME'S SAKE?
YOU'RE ON, KRABS.
BUT I'LL HAVE TO CHARGE YOU.
OH, OH, YOU ALWAYS KNEW HOW TO MAKE ME LAUGH.
YOU JUST DON'T FIND EMPLOYEES LIKE THAT ANYMORE.
YEAH, NOT UNLESS YOU LOOKED RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!
YOU'RE RIGHT, BOY.
I APPRECIATE YOU, SQUIDWARD.
NOW I FEEL COMPLETE.
NOW HOW'S ABOUT THAT PATTY?
EVERYONE, WATCH AND LEARN.
NO ONE WATCHES JIM.
ONE PATTY, THE RIGHTWAY.
IT'S A THING OF BEAUTY.
WHAT'S SO GREAT ABOUT A JIM PATTY, ANYWAY?
EH, IT'S O.K.
WOW...
THAT WAS... AMAZING.
UM, MR. JIM, SIR?
OH, HEY... YOU.
YOU'RE THE... GUY WHO SWEEPS UP, RIGHT?
I'M THE NEW FRY COOK, SIR.
OH.
YOU MADE THAT STEPPED-ON THING I SAW EARLIER, RIGHT?
DO YOU HAVE ANY TIPS YOU COULD PASS ON TO A ROOKIE?
HMM, BESIDES DON'T STEP ON THE FOOD?
PLEASE CRITIQUE MY WORK!
I WISH TO LEARN AT THE FEET OF THE MASTER!
NOW THAT'S THE WAY TO GROVEL.
I'LL DO IT.
YEP, PICKLE SLICES WERE TOO THICK.
HOLD IT...
HOLD IT.
O.K.
NOPE, TOO MUCH MUSTARD, SEE?
AW, MAN,
AM I A FRAUD?
SPONGEBOB, WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THERE?
CRYING MY EYES OUT.
WELL, HURRY UP, I GOTTA CRY, TOO.
WHY, SQUIDWARD?
BECAUSE WHEN JIM LEAVES, I'LL BE STUCK WITH YOUAGAIN.
DON'T WORRY SQUIDWARD.
JIMWON'T BE LEAVING.
HE'S TAKING MY JOB.
I'M THE ONE WHO'S LEAVING.
REALLY?
YES!
HOT-CHA-CHA, HOT-CHA-CHA, HOT-CHA-CHA-CHA-CHA-CHA-CHA!
OOH!
THE KRUSTY KRAB DESERVES BETTER THAN MY MEAGER SKILLS.
I SHOULD BE PROFESSIONAL.
I MUST... RESIGN.
"DEAR MR. KRABS..."
THREE CHEERS FOR THE WORLD'S GREATEST FRY COOK!
SPONGEBOB!
ME?
COME HERE, HELP US CHEER FOR JIM.
HIP, HIP...
HOORAY!
HIP, HIP...
HOORAY!
HIP, HIP...
HOORAY!
GOOD-BYE, GRILL.
GOOD-BYE, POT. GOOD-BYE, PAN.
SO LONG, FRY FAT.
GOOD-BYE, GREASE STAIN.
GOOD-BYE, FROZEN PATTY NUMBER ONE.
GOOD-BYE, FROZEN PATTY NUMBER TWO.
298 FROZEN PATTIES LATER...
GOOD-BYE, FREEZER.
SPONGEBOB?
THAT SMELLS LIKE A RESIGNATION LETTER.
SPONGEBOB'S RESIGNATION!
OH, THIS IS TERRIBLE.
NO ONE'S MAKING PATTIES.
AND THAT MEANS I'M NOT MAKING MONEY!
HEY, EUGENE, WHERE'S THAT LITTLE FRY COOK OF YOURS?
HE THINKS YOU'RE TAKING HIS JOB, SO HE'S RUN OFF.
HEY, GREAT IDEA, AND YOU CAN GIVE ME A RAISE.
LOOK AT THEM.
MR. KRABS IS PROBABLY OFFERING JIM MY JOB RIGHT NOW.
WELL, I BETTER GO FIND HIM.
SPONGEBOB?
DON'T WORRY, MR. KRABS, I WAS JUST LEAVING.
I'M NOT FIT TO INHABIT THE SAME KITCHEN AS JIM.
SO IT IS WITH A HEAVY HEART THAT I RELINQUISH MY POSITION AS FRY COOK.
WHAT ARE YOU THINKING, SPONGEBOB?
I'M NOT TAKING YOUR JOB.
BUT YOU'RE THE GREATEST FRY COOK IN THE WORLD.
THE KRUSTY KRAB DESERVES BETTER THAN ME.
BOTH THOSE STATEMENTS ARE TRUE, SPONGEBOB.
BUT THERE'S A REASON WHY I LEFT THE KRUSTY KRAB.
IT ALL STARTED ON A WARM SUMMER EVENING.
BUSINESS WAS SLOW
SO SQUIDWARD AND I WERE HAVING ONE OF OUR FAMOUS BULL SESSIONS.
WE SHOULD OPEN OUR OWN RESTAURANT AND STOP LINING OLD MAN K'S POCKETS.
NO, THANKS.
I'M JUST DOING THIS UNTIL MY CLARINET CAREER TAKES OFF.
WHAT IF IT NEVER DOES?
DON'T YOU WANT TO HAVE SOMETHING TO FALL BACK ON?
YEAH, HA!
I COULD LOSE MY BEAUTIFUL FLOWING HAIR TOO, BUT I'M NOT BUYING A WIG YET.
WELL, WHILE YOU GO WIG SHOPPING, I'M GONNA GO TALK TO MR. KRABS.
HEY, MR. KRABS.
YOU GOT A SECOND?
ANYTHING FOR YOU, JIMMY ME BOY.
COP A SQUAT AND LAY YOUR RACKET.
TELL ME WHAT'S ON YOUR WIG, JIM.
CUT THE GAS, KRABS, AND DIG THIS.
I'VE BEEN BUSTING MY CONCH FOR YOU.
YOU BETTER LAY ON SOME EXTRA GRAVY, OR I'M GONNA AGITATE THE GRAVEL.
WHAT NOW?
YOU KNOW, LAY A PATCH.
EXCUSE ME?
GIVE ME A RAISE OR I'M QUITTING.
A "RAISE"?
HMM, THAT'S NOT IN MY HIPTIONARY.
HELP ME GET WITH IT, JACK.
STOP TALKING LIKE THAT.
THESE SIDEBURNS AREN'T REAL.
I NEED MORE MONEY IN MY PAYCHECK AT THE END OF EVERY WEEK, CAPISCE?
MY HAIR, MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR.
MY HAIR, MY HAIR.
AH, IT'S STILL AS FUNNY TODAY AS IT WAS THEN.
YOU SEE, SPONGEBOB.
YOU'VE GOT ONE QUALITY JIM WILL NEVER HAVE.
YOU'RE CHEAP.
WOW, I NEVER THOUGHT OF IT THAT WAY.
SO YOU'LL STAY?
AYE-AYE, MR. KRABS.
THEN GET TO WORK, LAD!
WELL, EUGENE, LOOKS LIKE YOU'VE GOT YOURSELF ANOTHER SUCKER.
THE KID'S A GOOD FRY COOK
BUT HE'LL ONLY BE A GREAT FRY COOK
WHEN HE FINALLY GETS THE GUTS TO QUIT THIS DUMP.
GOOD LUCK, SPONGEBOB.
YOU'RE GONNA NEED IT.
THE KRUSTY KRAB ISN'T A DUMP.
OH, SHE'S A DUMP, ALL RIGHT.
BUT SHE'S MY DUMP.
OH...
"AND SLOWLY, EVER SO SLOWLY
"THE ANCIENT CRYPT DOOR CREAKS OPEN.
"AND FROM THE FESTERING BRINE OF THE DARKEST DARKNESS
"CRAWLED FORTH MONSTERS OF SUCH VILE NATURE
"WHOSE APPEARANCE WAS SO HIDEOUS AND THREATENING
THAT THE AUTHOR DIED TRYING TO RECOUNT THEM IN THIS NOVEL!"
THAT STORY SURE IS SCARY.
BUT IT'S ONLY A STORY, RIGHT, GARY?
WHY DON'T YOU SLEEP UP HERE TONIGHT, GARY?
WELL, I GUESS I'LL BE TURNING OFF THE LIGHT NOW.
SURE IS DARK.
OH, IT'S JUSTA CHAIR.
I GUESS I'M IMAGINING THINGS IN THE DARK.
ANOTHER MONSTER!
AH, IT'S JUST A CORAL BRANCH.
NOTHING TO BE SCARED OF.
WHAT WAS THAT?
HEY, SQUIDWARD, HAVE YOU SEEN SPONGEBOB?
WHOA.
YOU DON'T LOOK SO GOOD, LADDIE.
OH, IT'S NOTHING, MR. KRABS.
I JUST HAD A ROUGH NIGHT.
BUT IT'S NICE AND BRIGHT TODAY.
MEANDERIN' MERMAIDS.
WHAT'S ALL THIS RACKET, BOY?
OH, OH, THE DARK!
GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF!
SPONGEBOB, GET AHOLD OF YOURSELF.
WHAT IS IT NOW, BOY?
WHENEVER I BLINK, I SEE NOTHING BUT THE DARKNESS.
THEN DON'T BLINK.
BRILLIANT IDEA, MR. KRABS.
YES, IT'S WORKING.
SPONGEBOB, THAT'S ENOUGH!
WE'VE GOT 50 ORDERS TO FILL.
NOW GO IN THE COOLER AND GET SOME FRESH PATTIES.
YOU WANT ME TO GO IN...
THERE?
SAVE ME!
THE DARKNESS!
NOW LOOK, LAD.
YOUR WORK IS STARTING TO AFFECT ME PROFITS.
YOU NEED TO GET YOURSELF SOME SHUTEYE.
WHY DON'T YOU GO GET YOURSELF A NIGHT LIGHT?
NIGHT LIGHT?
YEAH, BOY.
IT'LL KEEP YOUR ROOM LIT SO YOU WON'T BE SCARED STIFF.
GREAT IDEA, MR. KRABS.
NIGHT LIGHTS... NIGHT LIGHTS...
IT'S BEAUTIFUL.
EXCUSE ME.
ARE THESE NIGHTLIGHTS GUARANTEED
TO KEEP THE CREEPY CREATURES OF THE DARK AWAY?
IF I ANSWER YES, WILL YOU LEAVE THE STORE SOONER?
NOW THAT I CAN SEE, WHOO-HOO!
I CAN SLEEP.
I WONDER WHAT'S IN MY DARK, SCARY-LOOKING BATHROOM.
NIGHT LIGHT, NIGHT LIGHT!
OH, THANK YOU.
WHEW.
ANOTHER LIGHT, PLEASE.
OH, THANK YOU.
THERE, THERE, THERE, AND THERE.
I'VE BEEN MEANING TO CHANGE YOUR TAIL LIGHT ANYWAY, GARY.
NOW THERE'S NOT ONE SQUARE INCH OF DARK.
MEOW.
WHAT WAS THAT GARY?
MEOW.
YOU'RE RIGHT, GARY.
I'VE GOT DARKNESS INSIDE OF ME!
HEY, SPONGEBOB'S HAVING A PARTY WITHOUT ME?
THROW A PARTY WITHOUT YOUR BEST FRIEND, WE'LL SEE ABOUT THAT-AUGH!
THAT WAS CLOSE, PATRICK.
YOU'RE SAFE HERE UNDER THESE NIGHT LIGHTS.
BUT YOU GOTTA STAY OUT OF THE DARK, BUDDY!
YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT KIND OF CREEPING CRITTER COULD BE LURKING IN THOSE SHADOWS.
WAIT, PATRICK!
WHAT IS THAT, GARY?
PATRICK, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
OH, I HAD TO MOVE MY ROCK OUT OF THE DARK AND INTO THE LIGHT.
YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS...
SLEEP OVER!
YOUR SLEEPING BAG, SIR.
THANK YOU, MY GOOD MAN.
OH, PATRICK, I'M SO GLAD YOU MADE THAT GAPING HOLE IN THE WALL.
LETTING IN ALL THE-TH-TH-TH...
THE DARK!
BURNING, AUGH!
I CAN FEEL IT, PAT, THE DARKNESS.
LIKE IT'S CREEPING UP ON US.
WHAT ARE YOU TWO WHIMPERING ABOUT?
IT'S ME, SQUIDWARD, YOU IDIOTS.
HI, SQUIDWARD.
LISTEN, GUYS.
I DON'T CARE OR WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU DO IN YOUR SPARE TIME
BUT COULD YOU TURN OFF ALL THESE LIGHTS?
BUT SQUIDWARD, WITHOUT OUR NIGHT LIGHTS
THE CREEPY CREATURES OF THE DARK...
OH, SPONGEBOB, THERE ARE NO "CREEPY CREATURES OF THE DARK."
IT'S ALL IN YOUR IMAGINATION.
NO, SQUIDWARD!
DON'T GO OUT IN THE DARK!
OH, WHY WON'T HE LISTEN?
PATRICK, MAYBE SQUIDWARD'S RIGHT.
WHAT IF ALL THIS IS JUST IN OUR IMAGINATION?
IN THAT CASE, WE'LL NEED EVEN MORE LIGHTS.
YOU SAID IT, PAT.
QUICK, SPONGEBOB.
TURN IT ON.
MORE LIGHT!
NOW, SPONGEBOB!
MORE LIGHT!
The battery-operated spoon has saved me so much time.
THIS IS WHAT PASSES FOR INFO-TAINMENT THESE DAYS?
SWEET MOTHER OF NEPTUNE'S MOTHER!
LOOK, BARNACLE BOY!
A CALL TO ACTION!
TO THE INVISIBLE BOAT MOBILE.
MORE LIGHTS, SPONGEBOB.
MORE LIGHTS.
MERMAID MAN!
BARNACLE BOY!
AW, ARE YOU GUYS HERE TO PROTECT US FROM THE DARKNESS THAT SURROUNDS US?
WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR YOUR CHILDISH GAMES.
WE'RE RESPONDING TO THE DISTRESS SIGNAL THAT YOU SENT.
OH, I'M SORRY, MERMAID MAN AND BARNACLE BOY.
THERE APPEARS TO BE A MISUNDERSTANDING.
YOU SEE, PATRICK AND I PUT UP ALL THESE LIGHTS TO SCARE AWAY THE MONSTERS IN THE DARK.
WE WEREN'T TRYING TO SUMMON YOU.
OH, FIDDLESTICKS, SPONGEBOB.
DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR US, IN OUR ADVANCED AGE, TO MOVE?
DON'T SHINE A GIANT LIGHT IN THE SKY UNLESS THERE'S A REAL EMERGENCY.
AND ANOTHER THING...
WHAT THE?
DEAR NEPTUNE!
IT'S THE MOST DANGEROUS AND FOREBODING OF ALL OUR ARCH-NEMESIS!
MY MORTAL ENEMY THAT I HAVE SEARCHED 57 YEARS FOR!
AT LAST I HAVE YOU!
COME GET SOME, FIEND.
COME BACK HERE, RIVAL!
OH, MY!
MERMAID MAN NEEDS ASSISTANCE.
THERE'S NO NEED TO FEAR, ABSORBOPANTS IS HERE.
SAVORY LIGHT.
COME TO ME...
HUH?
SAY, LET ME HELP YOU.
IS THAT ENOUGH LIGHT FOR YOU?
O.K., GUYS, HE'S ALL TAKEN CARE OF.
WHO?
THE MOTH, SILLY.
YOUR ARCH-ENEMY.
YOU'LL BE HAPPY TO KNOW HE WON'T BE GOING ANYWHERE ANY TIME SOON.
SEE YOU IN ANOTHER57 YEARS.
NO...!
I THINK IT'S TIME TO GO HOME.
WHY ARE WE HERE AGAIN?
BYE, MERMAID MAN AND BARNACLE BOY.
WHO ARE THOSE TWO HIDEOUS CREATURES OF THE DARK?
OH, I'LL TELL YOU ABOUT IT IN THE MORNING.
NOW, DRIVE.
WE ARE ALL ALONE, PATRICK.
NO LIGHT, NO SHELTER.
HUH?
LOOK, SPONGEBOB.
THERE'S A REALLY BIG LIGHT.
I'LL GO GET IT, BUDDY.
PAT!
COME BA...
TOO MUCH LIGHT, TOO MUCH LIGHT!