UH...
SPONGEBOB, ORDER.
OH.
ONE DOUBLE KRABBY PATTY, EVERYTHING ON IT.
ONE ORDER OF KELP FRIES.
ONE—
SQUIDWARD, WHAT SIZE KELP FRIES ARE THESE?
UH...
MEDIUM.
COMING RIGHT UP.
- NOW THAT'S WHAT I CALL FAST FOOD.
- SQUIDWARD, WHAT'S ALL THE HUBBARUB?
SPONGEBOB, WHAT'S ALL THE HUBBARUB?
OH, I'M NOT SURE, MR. KRABS.
THE CUSTOMER'S ORDER,
IN THIS GREASE SLICK.
I THINK I MAY BE HURT REAL BAD.
GREASE SLICK, EH?
OH, WHAT IS IT?
- THAT, ME BOY, IS A GREASE TRAP.
- IT KIND OF LOOKS LIKE NOBODY'S CLEANED OUT THE TRAP IN A WHILE.
- YOU KNOW, SPONGEBOB, YOU'RE RIGHT.
BUT THAT'S A BIG JOB,
COULD DO FOR NO EXTRA PAY.
YEAH!
HMM, NOTHING'S COMING OUT.
MR. KRABS, MAY I SEE THAT?
SAW THIS IN A MOVIE ONCE.
HMM.
YEAH, MAYBE I WASN'T DOING IT RIGHT.
OH, NEVER MIND.
I WAS.
YEAH, NOTHING LIKE A LONG NIGHT
TO PUT SOME HAIRS ON YOUR CHEST, EH, MR. KRABS?
WHAT?
- WELL, NOW THAT WE GOT THE OLD GREASE TRAP CLEANED OUT,
WITH ALL THIS EXCESS GREASE?
HMM.
RIGHT BEHIND THERE.
ALL RIGHT, LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
- MR. KRABS, ARE YOU SURE THAT WAS LEGAL?
"LEGAL"?
YEAH, LEGAL.
HMM.
HUH?
OW!
WHAT THE?
AND FALLEN IN.
EW, IT REEKS.
BUT IT TASTES DELICIOUS!
DARN IT, I ALMOST HAD AN IDEA.
OH, I DO.
I DO HAVE AN IDEA.
PLANKTON!
COMING, DEAR.
- SOMETHING IS TERRIBLY WRONG, SQUIDWARD.
- AND IT'S TAKEN YOU THIS LONG TO FIGURE THAT OUT?
OF CUSTOMERS ALL MORNING.
SO?
- SO I'M GONNA GO FIND OUT WHAT THAT RASCAL'S UP TO.
'SCUSE ME.
COMING THROUGH.
WHAT THE?
"TRY PLANKTON'S NEW DELICIOUS CHUMMY PATTIES,
NOW WITH EDIBLE FLAVOR"?
IS GOING ON HERE.
- NEXT CHUM-STOMER PLEASE.
WELL, WELL, EUGENE KRABS.
MOTHER-IN-LAW, PLANKTON.
FORMULA,
AND I WANT IT BACK.
- OH, SORRY TO DISAPPOINT, KRABS.
BUT I'VE DONE NO SUCH THING.
I'M SIMPLY USING A GIFT
TO MAKE MY CHUM TASTE GOOD.
A GIFT?
- IT'S ALMOST AS IF I HAD
FROM THE FLAVOR FAIRY.
- BE THAT AS IT MAY, PLANKTON, IT TAKES TWO TO TANGO.
WHAT?
- SPONGEBOB, STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING.
- BUT MR. KRABS, I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING.
NEVER MIND THAT NOW.
FOR YOU.
NOW, FROM NOW ON,
ONE FOR THE PATTY ITSELF,
JUST FOR THE GREASE.
ONTO THE FIRST ONE, AND VOILA.
IT'S A DELUXE KRABBY PATTY WITH EXTRA FLAVOR.
- MR. KRABS, DO YOU THINK
ALL THIS GREASE?
UNHEALTHY?
BOY, DIDN'T ANYONE EVER TELL YOU?
TELL ME WHAT?
AND A BURDEN TO OTHERS.
LITTLE LOWER.
LITTLE MORE.
MORE, LITTLE MORE.
OKAY, A LITTLE TO THE LEFT NOW.
UP A BIT.
OKAY, WAIT, THAT'S TOO FAR.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, PERFECT.
RIGHT THERE.
- MR. KRABS, I HOPE WHATEVER YOU'RE YELLING ABOUT
THAN MY MID-MORNING NAP.
- JUST HANGING A NEW SIGN, SQUIDWARD.
JUST WHAT THE WORLD NEEDED.
SHH.
OKAY, A LITTLE HIGHER NOW.
HEY, LOOK AT THAT.
WHAT?
THERE, RIGHT UP THERE.
WHERE?
I DON'T SEE ANYTHING.
A LITTLE TO THE RIGHT.
OKAY, I SEE IT.
- THERE'S A NEW SIGN UP AT THE KRUSTY KRAB.
IT SAYS THEY'RE SERVING
A DELUXE KRABBY PATTY.
THAT SOUNDS DELICIOUS.
YOU'RE TELLING ME.
I'M GONNA TRY ONE.
- NEXT CHUM-STOMER IN LINE, PLEASE.
HELLO?
THESE ARE DELICIOUS.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
I CAN'T IMAGINE WHAT MAKES THEM TASTE SO GOOD.
WELL, WELL, WELL.
TWO CAN PLAY THAT GAME.
BUT HE'S A BIGGER FOOL
IF HE THINKS OL' PLANKTON
LYING DOWN.
OH.
MAN, AM I STUFFED.
ME TOO.
WAS SO SWIMMING GOOD,
I'M GONNA GET ANOTHER ONE.
SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN.
HOLD IT.
WHAT'S THAT SIGN SAY?
IT LOOKS LIKE IT SAYS,
"ULTRA CHUMMY PATTIES
GOODNESS."
QUADRUPLE GOODNESS?
WE'LL SEE ABOUT THAT.
AS POSSIBLE.
WELL, OKAY, MR. KRABS.
I NEVER TURN THE GRILL OFF,
THAN THAT, IF YOU WANT.
- UH, I DON'T REALLY SEE WHAT—
WHOOP!
MERMAID'S MOLLUSK.
YAH.
IS THIS?
SORRY, MR. KRABS.
INTO OUR VAT OF EXTRA GREASE.
WELL, THEY'VE BEEN SOAKING IN THERE FOR ABOUT AN HOUR.
YUMMY BUNZ, HUH?
WELL, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO TRY
A LITTLE HARDER THAN THAT, KRABS,
HEARS ABOUT MY NEWEST CREATION.
CREATION?
MY SCANNER SHOWS THAT'S NOTHING MORE THAN A BURNED GREASE CRUMB.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
AND IT'S PACKED WITH FLAVOR.
CRISPITY CRUNCHITIES?
OH, WOW!
PEEYEW, MR. KRABS.
HUH?
- DON'T YOU USUALLY FLUSH THAT STUFF DOWN THE TOILET?
THIS IS OUR LATEST PRODUCT.
IT'S PURE GREASE ON A PAPER PLATE.
- I'LL GIVE YOU POINTS FOR HONESTY.
- SPONGEBOB, GET THOSE SEVEN ORDERS OF WOW! SOUP
OUT TO TABLE THREE PRONTO.
CUSTOMERS HAPPY,
WILL STEAL THEM BACK.
ARE YOU GOING TO EAT THAT?
TO TABLE THREE.
OKAY.
- SPONGEBOB! - SIR, YES, SIR.
THAT SOUP TO TABLE THREE,
AND WALKS THERE ITSELF?
- ACTUALLY, MR. KRABS, I'VE BEEN THINKING.
AND, WELL, DON'T YOU THINK MAYBE
HAS GONE A BIT TOO FAR?
YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK, SPONGEBOB?
AND GET BACK TO WORK.
CRUNCHITY MUNCHITY.
PATRICK!
OH, NO.
NOT MY BEST FRIEND TOO.
OH, NO.
THE HEALTH INSPECTOR?
OH, NO.
THE HEALTH INSPECTOR?
A HEALTH INSPECTOR?
IT WAS ME, SIR.
TO TELL YOU THAT, WELL,
AND MR. KRABS HAVE BEEN—
THEY'VE BEEN FEEDING PEOPLE—
WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?
NOTHING, MR. INSPECTOR.
- THEY'VE BEEN FEEDING PEOPLE—
BETWEEN OLD...
- F-F-F
- F-F-F— FRIENDS?
FRIENDS, RIGHT.
THEY'RE FEEDING PEOPLE GREASE.
- WELL, I THOUGHT I RECOGNIZED THIS HORRIBLE STENCH.
ONE OF YOU TWO
HADN'T SHOWERED IN A WHILE.
- OFFICER, OFFICER, I WOULD JUST
THAT THIS WAS ALL HIS IDEA, ALL OF IT.
OH, REALLY?
WELL, IN THAT CASE, YOU'LL BE HAPPY TO KNOW
I'LL BE ORDERING
CAN CLEAN UP YOUR ACT.
GOOD DAY.
WELL, I'M TAKING A BATH.
THE END OF AN ERA.
- NO, IT'S NOT THE END, MR. KRABS.
- IT IS, UNLESS I CAN FIND A WAY TO GET THIS GREASE SOAKED UP.
WAIT A MINUTE.
DID YOU SAY SOAKED UP?
- OH, WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
YOU'LL SEE.
HUH?
OH, IT WAS ALL A DREAM.
NO, IT WASN'T, MR. KRABS.
FROM THE SURROUNDING AREA,
AND I'M GONNA GO DISPOSE OF THEM PROPERLY.
THE KRUSTY KRAB IS GREASE FREE.
PATRICK, NO.
CRUNCHITY MUNCHITIES.
STOP IT.
GO AWAY.
NO, NO!
YOU'RE NOTHING.
TO SCARE ME,
MR. MIRROR?
I'VE MET SARDINES TOUGHER THAN YOU ARE.
TIME TO PUT YOU IN YOUR PLACE.
LOOKING GOOD, MIRROR.
SORRY ABOUT THE HARSH WORDS.
NOW TO ATTACK THESE FLOORS.
ARE YOU KIDDING?
HE'S AN ABSOLUTELY TREASURE TO HAVE AROUND THE RESTAURANT.
- OH, SOUNDS LIKE MR. KRABS
AGAIN TO HIS ASSOCIATES.
- AND HE'S BEEN WITH ME FOR SUCH A LONG TIME NOW.
I HAVE.
- BUT I'M AFRAID I'M GONNA HAVE TO LET THE LITTLE GUY GO TODAY.
- YEP, HE'S GONNA HAVE TO—
WHAT?
"LET THE LITTLE GUY GO"?
LITTLE GUY, WHO'S THE LITTLE GUY?
SQUIDWARD.
OOH, I AM TALLER.
YOU'RE THE LITTLE GUY, SQUIDSY.
NO.
CALLING ME SQUIDSY.
- OH, SQUIDWARD LOOKED TALLER THERE FOR A SECOND.
ACCURATE MEASUREMENT.
YOU'RE DOING?
- OH, JUST SEEING WHICH ONE OF US IS THE LITTLE GUY.
AND IT LOOKS LIKE IT IS YOU.
NO, I'M NOT.
SQUIDWARD, WAIT.
WE HAVEN'T MEASURED WITH MY LEGS AT FULL EXTENSION YET.
I DON'T CARE.
NOW GET BACK IN THE KITCHEN.
- YOU'LL CARE
WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN TO THE LITTLE GUY.
WHOA!
OH, WHO AM I KIDDING?
I NEED TO FACE THE FACTS,
THAT I'M THE LITTLE GUY,
AND THAT MR. KRABS IS LETTING ME GO TODAY.
KRABS IS LETTING YOU GO TODAY?
AS IN, I WON'T HAVE TO WORK WITH YOU EVER AGAIN?
- GOOD-BYE, KRUSTY KRAB.
GOOD-BYE, LIFE AS I KNOW IT.
- YEAH, AS MUCH AS I DON'T LIKE DOING IT,
I HAVE TO LET HIM GO.
GOTTEN TOO BIG FOR HIS CAGE.
GO ON, LITTLE GUY.
FLY AWAY.
YOU'LL BE MISSED.
OH, WHAT'S THE USE, GARY?
I'VE LOST THE WILL TO GO ON.
I DON'T FEEL LIKE GOING ON!
HI, PATRICK.
- OH, SORRY TO INTERRUPT YOUR FIT OF SELF-LOATHING, SPONGEBOB.
I'M JUST BORROWING YOUR REFRIGERATOR AGAIN.
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOURS?
NOTHING; IT'S JUST EMPTY.
OH, GET IT OUT OF MY SIGHT.
OF PURCHASING FOOD FOR MYSELF,
I DO NOT NEED A REFRIGERATOR.
- DON'T GET DOWN ON YOURSELF, BUDDY.
FOR ME.
OH, NO, I CAN'T, PATRICK.
I LOST MY JOB TODAY.
I WON'T BE ABLE TO BUY FOOD FOR YOU
OR FOR GARY OR FOR ANYBODY.
OH, NO!
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?
- I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T KNOW, I DON'T KNOW!
I'VE BEEN A FRY COOK FOR SO LONG.
I DON'T THINK I CAN DO ANYTHING ELSE.
I KNOW, SPONGEBOB.
WHEN I'M LOOKING FOR A JOB.
KICK BACK.
WATCH SOME TV,
OF DRINKABLE SAUSAGE.
GOOD, GARY.
OPENINGS IN THE CLASSIFIEDS.
BOO!
A LITTLE OUT OF DATE.
I BETTER GET SOME FRESH ONES.
LAWYER, NO, TOO MUCH ARGUING.
STUNT DRIVER, DON'T HAVE A BOATING LICENSE.
ASTRONAUT, DON'T LIKE FOOD IN A BAG.
OH, THIS ONE SOUNDS INTERESTING.
"BANK TELLER NEEDED."
THAT SHOULDN'T BE TOO MUCH OF A STRETCH FROM FRY COOKING.
20, 40, 60, 80, 90
95, 96, 97.
ORDER UP.
WHAT DO YOU THINK, BOSS?
CLAMSHELLS.
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, BOY?
TO BUILD ME A HOUSE,
NOT A SANDWICH.
OH!
- I GUESS I'M NOT A CARPENTER, PATRICK.
THAT FEELS NATURAL,
SOMETHING THAT SAYS, "THIS IS A JOB FOR A SPONGE."
A JOB LIKE THAT, PATRICK?
NOPE.
OH, BUT YES!
IT'S SO OBVIOUS.
AT THE KRUSTY KRAB.
THEY NEED A FRY COOK.
I CAN'T, PATRICK.
THAT'S THE JOB I GOT FIRED FROM.
REMEMBER?
OH.
TO THE SPONGE BEHIND YOU.
HE LOOKS HAPPY.
- THAT'S JUST A BILLBOARD, PATRICK.
- WHY DON'T YOU GET A JOB AS A BILLBOARD?
- I DON'T THINK THAT'S PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE.
TO BE A SPONGE MODEL.
FINE, DO IT YOUR WAY.
WOW.
WHAT A SETUP.
I DON'T KNOW, PATRICK.
MAYBE THIS WAS A MISTAKE.
MAYBE I DON'T HAVE THE TALENT.
OH, YOU HAVE THE TALENT.
THE NATURAL ABILITY?
- YEAH, BUT—
WAIT, ISN'T THAT THE SAME THING?
- WHY DON'T YOU FIND OUT? - WAIT!
I CAN'T DO THIS, PATRICK.
WHAT IF I DON'T STACK UP TO THE COMPETITION?
MR. KRABS FOR MY OLD JOB BACK.
NO WAY.
IT'S TOO LATE FOR THAT NOW.
KRABS DOESN'T NEED YOU ANYMORE.
TO PROVE YOU DON'T NEED HIM.
AND EARN ME SOME GROCERIES.
FOR THE SPONGE MODEL ROLE.
- WELL, WELL, "WANT" IS A STRONG WORD.
I'D LIKE AN AUDITION,
BUT IF YOU'VE ALREADY CAST IT, THAT'S FINE.
HAVE YOU CAST IT? I THINK SHE'S ALREADY CAST IT.
- WE BETTER GO, PATRICK. - HOLD IT.
YOU WANT THE AUDITION, KID?
- YOU GOT IT. - I DID?
SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT.
OKAY, HERE GOES.
PATRICK, PLEASE?
ding!
SORRY.
OKAY, OKAY, OKAY.
LET'S GET ON WITH THIS TRAIN WRECK.
OKAY, GETTING ON IT.
- ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU.
I'VE HEARD ENOUGH.
HOW'D I DO?
HORRIBLY.
I'VE SEEN CLAMS WITH MORE TALENT THAN YOU.
CALLS FOR A REAL SPONGE,
THE PART IS YOURS.
HERE'S THE SCRIPT.
AT 10:00.
DON'T BE LATE.
CAN MAKE IT IN THIS TOWN.
I AM GONNA BE A STAR!
- I'M STANDING HERE WITH THE NEW FACE OF TELEVISION,
MR. SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS.
I'M SURE THE VIEWING AUDIENCE WOULD LOVE TO KNOW,
THE NEXT BIG THING?
FANTASTIC.
SPONGEBOB, SPONGEBOB!
SPONGEBOB.
HEY, SPONGEBOB, YOU SAY SOMETHING?
OH, YES, I DID, PATRICK.
I SAID, "YOU'RE LOOKING AT THE NEW FACE OF TELEVISION."
ALL RIGHT.
- WELL, BETTER GO HOME AND GET SOME BEAUTY SLEEP.
YEAH, BEAUTY SLEEP!
THAT'S RIGHT.
AT A CHANGED SPONGE.
BUT DON'T WORRY.
I WON'T FORGET ALL THE PEOPLE
ON THE WAY UP.
- AFTERNOON, BOY-O.
OH, JUST AS I WAS SAYING.
I'D LIKE TO THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME MY HUMBLE START.
I WON'T FORGET YOU.
WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT?
OH, PROBABLY JUST NONSENSE AND BABBLING, AS USUAL.
- PATRICK, WHEN NEXT YOU SEE ME, IT SHALL BE ON THE TELEVISION.
OH, YOU'RE BACK.
- A STAR'S FIRST DAY IS HIS MOST IMPORTANT.
- GREAT, LET ME SEE IF THEY'RE READY ON SET.
SPONGEBOB'S HERE, SIR.
UH-HUH, OKAY, GREAT.
OKAY, YOU CAN GO RIGHT IN.
YOW!
I'M READY FOR MY CLOSE-UP, MR. DIRECTOR.
VERY WELL.
LOSE THE PANTS!
HANS, WHERE'S MY STAR?
WHAT'S HAPPENING?
WH-WH-WHAT'S HAPPENING?
IN THIS SCENE,
BATHROOM FIXTURES.
OKAY.
SO WHERE'S MY CLEANING UTENSIL?
ACH, DU LIEBER.
DON'T YOU GET IT?
YOU ARE THE CLEANING UTENSIL.
ROLL SPIED!
- NEW SPONGE COMMERCIAL, TAKE ONE.
ACTION!
OH, NO.
YOUR BATHROOM IS A DISASTER.
WITH THE NEW SPONGE.
WITH NEW SPONGE.
IT CLEANS SINKS.
JUST LOOK AT THAT SHINE!
splat!
GRIME AND GRIT.
NEW SPONGE ALSO CLEANS SHOWERS.
WHOA!
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
THAT TILE LOOKS GOOD AS NEW.
BUT BEST OF ALL,
ANY TOILET SPARKLE.
NO!
I CAN'T DO THIS.
CUT!
I'M SORRY.
I DON'T THINK I'M CUT OUT FOR ACTING.
WAS?
PROFESSIONAL ACTOR.
WELL, I'M NOT.
I AM A FRY COOK.
THAT'S WHAT I AM,
AND THAT'S WHAT I'VE ALWAYS BEEN.
I'M SORRY TO WASTE YOUR TIME, MISTER.
WAIT, WAIT!
EVER SO GENTLY.
MR. KRABS!
PLEASE TAKE ME BACK, PLEASE.
I PROMISE I'LL DO BETTER.
PLEASE.
- BOY, WHAT ARE YOU GOING ON ABOUT?
YOU'RE GONNA LET THE LITTLE GUY GO.
BUT I DON'T WANT TO GO.
PLEASE DON'T LET ME GO, MR. KRABS!
YOU'RE LOOKING AT A LITTLE GUY THAT DOESN'T WANT TO GO!
- ALL RIGHT, BOY-O.
I WON'T GET RID OF YOU
ON ONE CONDITION.
OH, BOY.
IN THE WORLD.
- HEY, WOULD YOU KEEP IT DOWN IN THERE?
I'M TRYING TO CONCENTRATE.
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