1 00:00:13,389 --> 00:00:14,763 GOOD MORNING, PATRICK. 2 00:00:14,805 --> 00:00:16,055 HEY, SPONGEBOB. 3 00:00:16,097 --> 00:00:17,763 - YOU READY FOR SOME FUN, OLD PAL? 4 00:00:17,805 --> 00:00:19,430 I SURE AM, OLD BUDDY. 5 00:00:19,471 --> 00:00:22,055 HEY, HERE COMES FUN NOW. 6 00:00:37,013 --> 00:00:38,555 OH, WOW. 7 00:00:38,596 --> 00:00:40,389 IT DOESN'T GET ANY BETTER THAN THAT. 8 00:00:40,430 --> 00:00:43,222 YEAH, I LOVE BOAT SCREAMING. 9 00:00:43,264 --> 00:00:44,222 OH, HEY, HEY, HEY! 10 00:00:44,264 --> 00:00:46,847 HERE COMES ANOTHER ONE! 11 00:00:49,888 --> 00:00:51,139 HERE COMES ANOTHER ONE. 12 00:01:03,222 --> 00:01:04,305 MORONS. 13 00:01:05,596 --> 00:01:07,097 EE, EE, EE, EE! 14 00:01:16,847 --> 00:01:20,888 - WOULD YOU TWO MIND STOPPING WITH YOUR BABY GAMES? 15 00:01:20,930 --> 00:01:23,763 DIDN'T ANYBODY TELL YOU IT'S THE BREAK OF DAWN? 16 00:01:23,805 --> 00:01:25,471 OH, GOOD MORNING, SQUIDWARD. 17 00:01:25,513 --> 00:01:27,139 YEAH, PATRICK HERE TOLD ME. 18 00:01:27,180 --> 00:01:29,471 - WHEN ARE YOU TWO GONNA GROW UP? 19 00:01:29,513 --> 00:01:31,139 HOW DO YOU PLAY THAT? 20 00:01:31,180 --> 00:01:33,680 - OH! MAYBE SQUIDWARD CAN COME DOWN 21 00:01:33,721 --> 00:01:35,471 AND TEACH US HOW TO PLAY IT! 22 00:01:35,513 --> 00:01:39,264 THAT'LL BE REAL FUN, WON'T IT, PATRICK? 23 00:01:42,847 --> 00:01:43,972 HUH. 24 00:01:50,305 --> 00:01:52,471 AAAAAaaaaaooo. 25 00:01:52,513 --> 00:01:54,430 WHEH... HEH. 26 00:01:54,471 --> 00:01:58,471 IT'S JUST NOT THE SAME WITHOUT PATRICK PLAYING ALONG, TOO. 27 00:02:01,055 --> 00:02:02,389 ALL RIGHT, PATRICK. 28 00:02:02,430 --> 00:02:04,555 YOU LEAVE ME NO CHOICE. 29 00:02:06,596 --> 00:02:07,888 YEOOOOW! 30 00:02:07,930 --> 00:02:09,972 WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA? 31 00:02:10,013 --> 00:02:12,013 - PATRICK! YOU HAVE A BEARD! 32 00:02:12,055 --> 00:02:15,347 I DO? 33 00:02:15,389 --> 00:02:17,888 - YOU SURE LOOK GROWN UP WITH THAT NEW BEARD. 34 00:02:17,930 --> 00:02:19,264 WOW. 35 00:02:19,305 --> 00:02:20,888 YOU REALLY THINK SO? 36 00:02:20,930 --> 00:02:22,763 - AND EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT GROWN-UPS 37 00:02:22,805 --> 00:02:24,847 NEVER PLAY WITH KIDS. 38 00:02:24,888 --> 00:02:26,347 AND ON THAT NOTE, 39 00:02:26,389 --> 00:02:28,055 I WOULD LIKE TO PERSONALLY COMMEND 40 00:02:28,097 --> 00:02:30,596 THE SEA STAR FOR TAKING HIS FIRST BABY STEPS 41 00:02:30,638 --> 00:02:33,139 INTO THE ADULT WORLD. 42 00:02:33,180 --> 00:02:35,013 FACIAL HAIR IS A GOOD START, I SUPPOSE. 43 00:02:35,055 --> 00:02:37,680 I AM CURIOUS TO KNOW 44 00:02:37,721 --> 00:02:41,139 WHAT MATURE PEOPLE LIKE SQUIDWARD DO. 45 00:02:41,180 --> 00:02:43,097 WOULD YOU SHOW ME? 46 00:02:43,139 --> 00:02:44,097 SHOW YOU? 47 00:02:44,139 --> 00:02:45,680 SHOW ME, SHOW ME! 48 00:02:45,721 --> 00:02:47,097 PUH-PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEA— PRETTY PLEASE? 49 00:02:47,139 --> 00:02:48,139 PRETTY PLEASE? 50 00:02:49,180 --> 00:02:51,389 I KNOW I'M GONNA REGRET THIS. 51 00:02:51,430 --> 00:02:53,471 ALL RIGHT, I WILL TAKE ON THIS MISSION. 52 00:02:53,513 --> 00:02:55,305 HOORAY! 53 00:02:55,347 --> 00:02:57,763 - IN THE HOPE THAT A QUIET, GROWN-UP NEIGHBORHOOD 54 00:02:57,805 --> 00:02:59,930 WILL PREVAIL AT LAST, 55 00:02:59,972 --> 00:03:02,596 MOVING ME ONE STEP CLOSER TO PEACE 56 00:03:02,638 --> 00:03:04,930 AND BLESSED TRANQUILITY. 57 00:03:04,972 --> 00:03:06,097 A PLACE WHERE AT LAST I CAN— 58 00:03:06,139 --> 00:03:08,180 - OH, OH, OH, OH! OH, OH, OH! 59 00:03:08,222 --> 00:03:11,513 OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH! OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH, OH OH— 60 00:03:11,555 --> 00:03:13,389 WHAT? 61 00:03:13,430 --> 00:03:15,596 - MAY I TAG ALONG AND OBSERVE YOUR INSTRUCTION? 62 00:03:15,638 --> 00:03:19,264 - WHY IN A MILLION YEARS WOULD I LET YOU TAG ALONG? 63 00:03:19,305 --> 00:03:20,888 - BECAUSE MAYBE SOME OF YOUR LESSONS IN MATURITY 64 00:03:20,930 --> 00:03:22,347 WILL RUB OFF ON ME, 65 00:03:22,389 --> 00:03:24,222 BRINGING US TWO STEPS CLOSER 66 00:03:24,264 --> 00:03:25,638 TO A QUIET, GROWN-UP NEIGHBORHOOD. 67 00:03:25,680 --> 00:03:28,139 - WOW. THAT ACTUALLY MADE SENSE. 68 00:03:28,180 --> 00:03:29,721 IT MUST BE WORKING ALREADY. 69 00:03:29,763 --> 00:03:30,763 IS THAT A YES? 70 00:03:30,805 --> 00:03:33,055 OH, HMM... 71 00:03:33,097 --> 00:03:35,305 LET ME ESCORT YOU TO MY PLACE, 72 00:03:35,347 --> 00:03:36,930 MY GOOD SIR. 73 00:03:36,972 --> 00:03:38,638 WE'LL NEED TO START WITH PERSONAL GROOMING 74 00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:40,805 FOR YOUR GROWN-UP MAKEOVER. 75 00:03:41,847 --> 00:03:43,389 SOUNDS GOOD TO ME. 76 00:03:43,471 --> 00:03:45,721 - WE MAY HAVE TO FIND YOU SOME NEW CLOTHES AS WELL. 77 00:03:45,763 --> 00:03:47,222 NEW CLOTHES? 78 00:03:47,264 --> 00:03:48,596 - TO GO ALONG WITH YOUR NEW BEARD, 79 00:03:48,638 --> 00:03:51,513 WHICH MAKES YOU LOOK VERY DISTINGUISHED. 80 00:03:51,555 --> 00:03:53,721 DISTINGUISHED. 81 00:03:53,763 --> 00:03:56,097 - ALL RIGHT! DISTINGUISHED. 82 00:03:56,139 --> 00:03:57,097 YEAH, HUH, HUH. 83 00:03:57,139 --> 00:03:58,389 EXCUSE ME. 84 00:03:58,430 --> 00:04:01,180 GROWN-UPS DO NOT HIGH-FIVE. 85 00:04:01,222 --> 00:04:05,139 OH, RIGHT. 86 00:04:24,471 --> 00:04:25,930 SO, UM, WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK? 87 00:04:25,972 --> 00:04:26,930 HUH? 88 00:04:26,972 --> 00:04:28,097 SWEET DUDS, HUH, PATRICK? 89 00:04:28,139 --> 00:04:28,888 THEY SURE ARE. 90 00:04:28,930 --> 00:04:30,180 AHEM. 91 00:04:30,222 --> 00:04:32,389 FOR A BABY. 92 00:04:32,430 --> 00:04:35,888 - WELL PLAYED, PATRICK. WELL PLAYED. 93 00:04:39,222 --> 00:04:41,264 - MAY I TAKE YOUR HAT AND CANE, SIR? 94 00:04:41,305 --> 00:04:43,513 - WHY, CERTAINLY. 95 00:04:43,555 --> 00:04:44,930 - ENJOY YOUR EVENING, GENTLEMEN. 96 00:04:44,972 --> 00:04:45,930 OHHHHH... 97 00:04:51,596 --> 00:04:53,389 OH, NO. 98 00:04:55,180 --> 00:04:58,305 APPETIZERS. 99 00:04:58,347 --> 00:05:00,847 OH, BOY, EATS! 100 00:05:00,888 --> 00:05:02,471 YUM, YUM, YUM. 101 00:05:02,513 --> 00:05:06,097 - AND WE ALSO HAVE MILK AND COOKIES. 102 00:05:07,721 --> 00:05:09,596 - OH! ARE THOSE CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES? 103 00:05:09,638 --> 00:05:11,222 - CAN I— - PATRICK! 104 00:05:11,264 --> 00:05:13,389 I'M SURE YOU'D RATHER HAVE SOME TETRAZZINI 105 00:05:13,430 --> 00:05:15,555 WE GROWN-UPS ORDERED, RIGHT? 106 00:05:15,596 --> 00:05:18,097 DAH... YES, SQUIDWARD. 107 00:05:18,139 --> 00:05:19,888 I'M FRANKLY SHOCKED THEY SERVE 108 00:05:19,930 --> 00:05:22,013 SUCH ELEMENTARY FARE HERE. 109 00:05:22,055 --> 00:05:23,972 INDEED. 110 00:05:24,013 --> 00:05:28,180 AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE PIECE IS THIS LOVELY STATUE 111 00:05:28,222 --> 00:05:29,972 FROM THE REEFAISSANCE ERA. 112 00:05:30,013 --> 00:05:31,471 BOOOORING. 113 00:05:31,513 --> 00:05:32,471 BORING? 114 00:05:32,513 --> 00:05:34,097 - UH, I—NO. 115 00:05:34,139 --> 00:05:37,513 I SAID, "FLOOOOOORING." 116 00:05:37,555 --> 00:05:42,222 THE FLOORING COMPLEMENTS THE ARTWORK HERE EXQUISITELY. 117 00:05:42,264 --> 00:05:44,471 - YES, WELL, I SUPPOSE IT DOES. 118 00:05:44,513 --> 00:05:45,847 BAH, AH, AH, AH, AH, AH! 119 00:05:45,888 --> 00:05:49,638 - SPONGEBOB, GET DOWN FROM THERE RIGHT NOW! 120 00:05:49,680 --> 00:05:52,430 - WOW! [whump!] 121 00:05:54,930 --> 00:05:56,389 - DON'T WORRY, GUYS. I'M OKAY. 122 00:05:56,430 --> 00:05:59,013 REALLY, I'M OOOOOKAY. 123 00:06:06,972 --> 00:06:08,222 THERE. GOOD AS NE— 124 00:06:08,264 --> 00:06:10,055 OH, OH! 125 00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:20,596 ALL FIXED, GUYS. 126 00:06:20,638 --> 00:06:22,305 SECURITY! 127 00:06:22,347 --> 00:06:25,721 PLEASE BE GENTLE. 128 00:06:25,763 --> 00:06:27,430 HUH, THAT'S WEIRD. 129 00:06:27,471 --> 00:06:31,305 I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA GET TOSSED OUT ON MY— AAAAAAGH! WOW. 130 00:06:33,638 --> 00:06:37,139 - PATRICK STAR, I AM VERY PROUD 131 00:06:37,180 --> 00:06:38,471 OF WHAT YOU DID IN THERE. 132 00:06:38,513 --> 00:06:40,555 YOU KNOW, THAT BEARD WAS THE BEST THING 133 00:06:40,596 --> 00:06:42,847 THAT'S EVER HAPPENED TO YOU. 134 00:06:42,888 --> 00:06:45,347 WELL, OTHER THAN ME, OF COURSE, HA. 135 00:06:45,389 --> 00:06:49,055 - THAT BEARD. I MUST REMOVE THAT BEARD. 136 00:06:49,097 --> 00:06:50,430 REMOVE BEARD, 137 00:06:50,471 --> 00:06:52,763 RESTORE FRIENDSHIP! 138 00:06:52,805 --> 00:06:54,305 - AND THAT'S WHEN I TOLD THEM, 139 00:06:54,347 --> 00:06:56,264 LOOK, IF I WANTED TO STAND AROUND— 140 00:06:56,305 --> 00:06:58,222 THAT'S IT! 141 00:06:58,264 --> 00:07:00,222 IT MUST BE DONE. 142 00:07:00,264 --> 00:07:01,389 SPONGEBOB! 143 00:07:01,430 --> 00:07:03,555 THE ONLY THING THAT MUST BE DONE 144 00:07:03,596 --> 00:07:05,180 IS CUTTING THE CORD WITH YOU. 145 00:07:05,222 --> 00:07:06,222 NO, PLEASE. 146 00:07:06,264 --> 00:07:08,471 LOOK, MR. BABYPANTS. 147 00:07:08,513 --> 00:07:11,347 IT IS GLARINGLY CLEAR THAT YOU LEARNED NOTHING TODAY 148 00:07:11,389 --> 00:07:13,097 ABOUT HOW TO BE MATURE. 149 00:07:13,139 --> 00:07:14,596 - BUT— - NO BUTS. 150 00:07:14,638 --> 00:07:16,972 WE ARE THROUGH ENTERTAINING YOUR COMPANY. 151 00:07:17,013 --> 00:07:18,180 SHALL WE? 152 00:07:18,222 --> 00:07:20,430 LET'S SHALL. 153 00:07:20,471 --> 00:07:22,805 PATRICK, DON'T LEAVE ME. 154 00:07:23,972 --> 00:07:25,638 OH. 155 00:07:27,180 --> 00:07:29,513 WHY ARE THERE SO MANY STAIRS? 156 00:07:29,555 --> 00:07:31,555 - YOU'VE ONLY GONE UP THREE STEPS. 157 00:07:31,596 --> 00:07:33,389 WELL, IT FEELS LIKE FOUR. 158 00:07:33,430 --> 00:07:34,847 WE ARE ABOUT TO ENTER 159 00:07:34,888 --> 00:07:36,513 THE PINNACLE OF GROWN-UP CULTURE 160 00:07:36,555 --> 00:07:38,471 HERE IN BIKINI BOTTOM. 161 00:07:38,513 --> 00:07:42,847 ALSO KNOWN AS THE FAMED BIKINI BOTTOM OPERA HOUSE. 162 00:07:47,139 --> 00:07:48,305 - WHAT? - NOTHING. 163 00:07:48,347 --> 00:07:50,305 LET'S GO FIND OUR SEATS. 164 00:07:52,471 --> 00:07:54,430 - HEY, ALL RIGHT! BOX SEATS! 165 00:07:54,471 --> 00:07:55,847 UH, I MEAN, 166 00:07:55,888 --> 00:07:59,055 THIS SEAT CHOICE IS MOST MATURE. 167 00:07:59,097 --> 00:08:02,471 CERTAINLY MORE SO THAN THAT RAPSCALLION SPONGE, 168 00:08:02,513 --> 00:08:04,430 WHOSE NAME WE SHALL NOT MENTION, 169 00:08:04,471 --> 00:08:06,097 WOULD HAVE PICKED. 170 00:08:06,139 --> 00:08:11,055 CERTAINLY. 171 00:08:17,888 --> 00:08:21,555 - A MOST EXEMPLARY PERFORMANCE. UH— 172 00:08:21,596 --> 00:08:23,763 - OH, OH, IT GETS EVEN MORE THRILLING FROM HERE. 173 00:08:28,555 --> 00:08:29,680 - WHAT THE—? 174 00:08:29,721 --> 00:08:31,471 SHE'S BEAUTIFUL. 175 00:08:34,680 --> 00:08:37,847 - THERE ONCE WAS A MAN FROM NANTUCKET. 176 00:08:38,888 --> 00:08:39,847 OOPS, SORRY, WRONG ONE. 177 00:08:41,930 --> 00:08:43,596 AHEM! 178 00:08:58,222 --> 00:08:59,471 TERRIBLE. 179 00:09:39,513 --> 00:09:41,180 HEY! 180 00:09:41,222 --> 00:09:43,596 HOW'S A SEA URCHIN SUPPOSED TO GET ANY SLEEP 181 00:09:43,638 --> 00:09:46,430 WITH ALL THESE SALTY TEARS FALLING ON HIM? 182 00:09:46,471 --> 00:09:50,055 I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE. 183 00:09:51,139 --> 00:09:52,264 'SCUSE ME. 184 00:09:52,305 --> 00:09:53,389 COMIN' THROUGH. 185 00:09:53,430 --> 00:09:54,805 HEY, WATCH IT, MISTER. 186 00:09:54,847 --> 00:09:57,471 SAY, LADY, HOW DO I GET OUTTA THIS JOINT? 187 00:09:57,513 --> 00:09:59,680 - EXIT STAGE LEFT IS THATAWAY. 188 00:09:59,721 --> 00:10:01,430 - THANKS, CUTIE. NICE HAT. 189 00:10:01,471 --> 00:10:02,555 HEY, STOP THAT BEARD! 190 00:10:02,596 --> 00:10:04,347 PATRICK, IT'S NOT A BEARD. 191 00:10:04,389 --> 00:10:06,471 IT'S A SEA URCHIN. 192 00:10:06,513 --> 00:10:08,305 IT MUST HAVE BEEN SLEEPING ON YOUR FACE 193 00:10:08,347 --> 00:10:10,513 UNTIL YOUR TEARS AWOKE IT FROM ITS HIBERNATION. 194 00:10:10,555 --> 00:10:12,847 HOW DO YOU KNOW MY NAME? 195 00:10:12,888 --> 00:10:14,680 BECAUSE, MR. PATRICK STAR, 196 00:10:14,721 --> 00:10:16,097 YOU TOLD ME. 197 00:10:16,139 --> 00:10:18,139 SPONGEBOB! 198 00:10:18,180 --> 00:10:20,638 PATRICK! 199 00:10:20,680 --> 00:10:23,222 - OH, PLEASE, YOU CAN CALL ME PATRICK. 200 00:10:29,180 --> 00:10:30,972 - QUIET! HOLD IT! 201 00:10:31,013 --> 00:10:32,305 STOP IT RIGHT THERE. 202 00:10:32,347 --> 00:10:35,180 I AM ASHAMED AND DISGUSTED BY YOU PEOPLE. 203 00:10:35,222 --> 00:10:38,347 I MEAN, DON'T YOU KNOW A TERRIBLE PERFORMANCE 204 00:10:38,389 --> 00:10:39,471 WHEN YOU SEE IT? 205 00:10:39,513 --> 00:10:42,471 YES, WE DO. 206 00:10:42,513 --> 00:10:45,680 - THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT YOU— NO, NO, NO, I DIDN'T MEAN IT LIKE THAT. 207 00:10:45,721 --> 00:10:46,680 IT WAS A— 208 00:10:51,638 --> 00:10:53,805 FOOD FIGHT! 209 00:11:27,139 --> 00:11:31,721 - SPONGEBOB, WHY AREN'T THOSE ORDERS UP YET? 210 00:11:35,596 --> 00:11:37,847 - SPONGEBOB, THE COLLECTIVE BLOOD SUGAR OUT HERE 211 00:11:37,888 --> 00:11:40,222 IS GETTING DANGEROUSLY LOW. 212 00:11:40,264 --> 00:11:43,305 WHY ARE YOU GRILLING INDEX CARDS? 213 00:11:43,347 --> 00:11:44,305 SORRY, SQUIDWARD. 214 00:11:44,347 --> 00:11:45,721 I GOT A LITTLE DISTRACTED. 215 00:11:45,763 --> 00:11:47,139 I'M PRACTICING MY ORAL REPORT 216 00:11:47,180 --> 00:11:48,305 FOR BOATING SCHOOL TOMORROW. 217 00:11:48,347 --> 00:11:49,805 YOU KNOW, SPONGEBOB, 218 00:11:49,847 --> 00:11:51,721 STATISTICS SHOW THAT PUBLIC SPEAKING 219 00:11:51,763 --> 00:11:54,389 IS THE NUMBER THREE CAUSE OF STRESS, 220 00:11:54,430 --> 00:11:56,097 RIGHT BEHIND DEATH AND MARRIAGE. 221 00:11:56,139 --> 00:11:57,180 NOW, GET THOSE ORDERS READY! 222 00:11:57,222 --> 00:11:59,430 OKAY, OKAY! 223 00:11:59,471 --> 00:12:02,555 HMPH, WHAT'S SO SCARY ABOUT PUBLIC SPEAKING, ANYWAY? 224 00:12:02,596 --> 00:12:04,013 YOU JUST STAND IN FRONT OF THE PUBLIC 225 00:12:04,055 --> 00:12:06,513 AND SPEAK PUBLICLY. 226 00:12:06,555 --> 00:12:08,596 IT'S REALLY NO DIFFERENT THAN WHAT I DO EVERY DAY. 227 00:12:12,139 --> 00:12:13,555 NO BIG DEAL, SPONGEBOB. 228 00:12:13,596 --> 00:12:15,013 YOU JUST STAND IN FRONT OF 'EM... 229 00:12:17,264 --> 00:12:18,430 ALL OF 'EM... 230 00:12:18,471 --> 00:12:19,847 LOOKING... 231 00:12:19,888 --> 00:12:21,763 AT ME... 232 00:12:23,222 --> 00:12:24,471 - WITH THEIR EYES! YEEEEOOOOW! 233 00:12:24,513 --> 00:12:25,471 SQUIDWARD WAS RIGHT. 234 00:12:25,513 --> 00:12:26,888 PUBLIC SPEAKING IS FRIGHTENING. 235 00:12:26,930 --> 00:12:29,389 - MUST I DO EVERYTHING MYSELF? 236 00:12:29,430 --> 00:12:31,305 AH, STAY BACK. 237 00:12:31,347 --> 00:12:33,222 YOU'LL GET YOUR PATTY WHEN IT'S YOUR TURN. 238 00:12:39,180 --> 00:12:41,013 - I NEVER KNEW AN AUDIENCE COULD GET SO PHYSICAL. 239 00:12:44,222 --> 00:12:46,513 THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING. 240 00:12:46,555 --> 00:12:47,847 - YA-HOOOO! 241 00:12:47,888 --> 00:12:52,097 OW, OW! 242 00:12:52,139 --> 00:12:55,847 - OH, SORRY. WRONG ROCK. 243 00:12:55,888 --> 00:12:57,264 - PATRICK, I WONDER IF YOU'D HELP ME 244 00:12:57,305 --> 00:12:58,596 BY LENDING ME YOUR EYES. 245 00:12:58,638 --> 00:12:59,972 OKAY. 246 00:13:01,389 --> 00:13:03,055 - NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. YOU CAN KEEP 'EM. 247 00:13:03,097 --> 00:13:04,555 I JUST WANT YOU TO WATCH ME 248 00:13:04,596 --> 00:13:06,222 WHILE I PRACTICE MY SPEECH UP HERE. 249 00:13:06,264 --> 00:13:07,930 JUST PRETEND YOU'RE A STUDENT AT HIS DESK. 250 00:13:07,972 --> 00:13:10,222 OKAY. 251 00:13:10,264 --> 00:13:12,513 HOLD—HOLD—HOLD ON. 252 00:13:12,555 --> 00:13:15,471 I LIKE TO SIT IN THE BACK OF THE CLASS. 253 00:13:24,305 --> 00:13:25,638 OKAY, HERE GOES. 254 00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:27,139 BOATING SAFETY I— 255 00:13:27,180 --> 00:13:28,389 SPONGEBOB! 256 00:13:28,430 --> 00:13:29,888 CAN I HAVE A HALL PASS? 257 00:13:29,930 --> 00:13:31,347 OH, NOT NOW, PATRICK. 258 00:13:31,389 --> 00:13:32,847 JUST SIT TIGHT AND LET ME PRACTICE. 259 00:13:32,888 --> 00:13:34,721 - FINE. - AHEM. BOATING SAFE— 260 00:13:34,763 --> 00:13:36,555 - BORING! NEXT. 261 00:13:36,596 --> 00:13:37,680 - PATRICK, YOU'RE KIND OF DERAILING 262 00:13:37,721 --> 00:13:39,055 THE PROCEEDINGS HERE. 263 00:13:39,097 --> 00:13:40,305 UH, JUST FOCUS ON ME, HUH? 264 00:13:40,347 --> 00:13:42,847 ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. 265 00:13:45,222 --> 00:13:46,888 - SO, WITHOUT FURTHER ADIEU— 266 00:13:50,055 --> 00:13:51,013 PATRICK. 267 00:13:51,055 --> 00:13:52,721 PATRICK, WAKE UP. 268 00:13:52,763 --> 00:13:54,930 WHAT HAPPENED, PATRICK? 269 00:13:54,972 --> 00:13:56,972 OH, COME ON, SPONGEBOB. 270 00:13:57,013 --> 00:13:58,097 YOU THINK EVERYONE CAN STAY AWAKE 271 00:13:58,139 --> 00:13:59,596 FOR YOUR BORING SPEECH? 272 00:13:59,638 --> 00:14:02,097 - I DON'T KNOW. DO YOU THINK THAT'S TOO MUCH TO EXPECT? 273 00:14:02,139 --> 00:14:03,638 YES! 274 00:14:03,680 --> 00:14:05,430 AND YOU SHOULD BE PREPARED FOR WORSE. 275 00:14:05,471 --> 00:14:06,430 WORSE? 276 00:14:06,471 --> 00:14:07,972 YOU'RE GONNA HAVE THINGS 277 00:14:08,013 --> 00:14:09,222 THROWN AT YOU YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE. 278 00:14:09,264 --> 00:14:10,389 YOU BETTER BE READY! 279 00:14:10,430 --> 00:14:11,721 NOW, TRY AGAIN. 280 00:14:11,763 --> 00:14:12,721 OKAY. 281 00:14:14,430 --> 00:14:17,180 - BOATING SAFETY— 282 00:14:17,222 --> 00:14:19,013 BOATING SAFE— 283 00:14:19,055 --> 00:14:21,139 THAT'S IT! 284 00:14:21,180 --> 00:14:22,638 FIGHT THROUGH! 285 00:14:22,680 --> 00:14:24,013 - UGH! AGH! 286 00:14:25,763 --> 00:14:28,013 PATRICK, NOBODY THROWS PILLOWS IN CLASS. 287 00:14:28,055 --> 00:14:29,680 - SAYS YOU! SPEECH! 288 00:14:29,721 --> 00:14:31,264 - BOATING SAFE— 289 00:14:31,305 --> 00:14:32,680 - SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS. 290 00:14:32,721 --> 00:14:35,471 WHAT A MESS YOU'VE MADE OF MY CLASSROOM. 291 00:14:35,513 --> 00:14:37,471 - UH, YOU SORTA HAD A HAND IN THAT TOO, PATRICK. 292 00:14:37,513 --> 00:14:40,847 YOUNG MAN, HOW DARE YOU? 293 00:14:40,888 --> 00:14:43,180 - WHAT— A DETENTION SLIP? 294 00:14:43,222 --> 00:14:45,763 - I'M NOT HEARING YOUR ORAL REPORT. 295 00:14:45,805 --> 00:14:48,139 - OKAY. BOATING SAFETY— 296 00:14:50,471 --> 00:14:51,847 TRY AGAIN. 297 00:14:51,888 --> 00:14:53,222 BOATING... SAFETY... 298 00:14:55,930 --> 00:14:57,430 COME ON, SQUAREPANTS! 299 00:14:57,471 --> 00:14:59,139 IS THIS THE BEST YOU CAN DO? 300 00:14:59,180 --> 00:15:02,389 - PATRICK, SOMEHOW I DON'T THINK THIS IS WORKING. 301 00:15:06,471 --> 00:15:08,055 - SPEECH! - WAAAHHH! 302 00:15:08,097 --> 00:15:09,347 - SPEECH, SPEECH, SPEECH! SPEECH, SPEECH! 303 00:15:09,389 --> 00:15:11,389 SPEECH, SPEECH, SPEECH! 304 00:15:11,430 --> 00:15:13,013 SPEECH, SPEECH! SPEECH, SPEECH, SPEECH! 305 00:15:13,055 --> 00:15:14,721 PATRICK, STOP! 306 00:15:14,763 --> 00:15:16,389 SOMEHOW, YOUR HELP JUST ISN'T HELPING. 307 00:15:16,430 --> 00:15:18,055 I AM MORE NERVOUS ABOUT THIS ORAL REPORT 308 00:15:18,097 --> 00:15:19,139 THAN I'VE EVER BEEN ABOUT ANYTHING. 309 00:15:20,721 --> 00:15:22,264 - YEAH, YOU DO LOOK PRETTY TERRIBLE. 310 00:15:22,305 --> 00:15:23,930 - WELL, IF I DON'T DO MY REPORT, 311 00:15:23,972 --> 00:15:25,055 THEN I DON'T PASS. 312 00:15:25,097 --> 00:15:26,347 AND IF I DON'T PASS, 313 00:15:26,389 --> 00:15:27,930 THEN I DON'T GET MY BOATING LICENSE. 314 00:15:29,888 --> 00:15:31,264 WAIT, BUDDY. 315 00:15:31,305 --> 00:15:32,930 I KNOW HOW YOU CAN GET YOUR BOATING LICENSE. 316 00:15:32,972 --> 00:15:34,888 YOUR FRIEND THE SQUIRREL GIRL IS REAL GOOD 317 00:15:34,930 --> 00:15:36,180 WITH HER PAWS. 318 00:15:36,222 --> 00:15:38,847 MAYBE SHE COULD MAKE YOU A FAKE ONE. 319 00:15:38,888 --> 00:15:40,680 - NO, PATRICK. THAT'S ILLEGAL. 320 00:15:40,721 --> 00:15:42,389 BUT SHE MIGHT BE ABLE TO HELP ME 321 00:15:42,430 --> 00:15:44,097 GET OVER THIS ANXIETY. 322 00:15:44,139 --> 00:15:45,305 SHE'S ALWAYS SPEAKING AT SCIENCE CONFERENCES. 323 00:15:45,347 --> 00:15:47,055 SHE'S PROBABLY FULL OF POINTERS. 324 00:15:47,097 --> 00:15:49,847 - YEAH, OR SHE PROBABLY HAS A ROBOT 325 00:15:49,888 --> 00:15:52,222 THAT CAN DEMOLISH THE WHOLE SCHOOL FOR YA. 326 00:15:55,264 --> 00:15:57,055 WHITE KNUCKLES... 327 00:15:57,097 --> 00:15:58,430 LEAKY PORES... 328 00:15:58,471 --> 00:16:00,347 STOMACH IN KNOTS... 329 00:16:00,389 --> 00:16:01,638 YEP. 330 00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:03,347 IT LOOKS PRETTY BAD. 331 00:16:03,389 --> 00:16:06,471 SPONGEBOB, YOU'RE AFFLICTED WITH SEVERE ORAL-REPORTITIS. 332 00:16:06,513 --> 00:16:08,513 YOU KNOW, PATIENTS WITH THIS DISEASE 333 00:16:08,555 --> 00:16:10,305 HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO PHYSICALLY EXPLODE. 334 00:16:10,347 --> 00:16:11,805 KERPOW! 335 00:16:11,847 --> 00:16:13,347 - AIEEE! YA YAIII! 336 00:16:13,389 --> 00:16:14,805 - IT HAS BEEN SCIENTIFICALLY PROVEN 337 00:16:14,847 --> 00:16:16,471 THAT 85% OF SPEECH-RELATED STRESS 338 00:16:16,513 --> 00:16:19,097 CAN BE ALLEVIATED IF THE SPEAKER IMAGINES THE AUDIENCE 339 00:16:19,139 --> 00:16:23,347 IN THEIR UNDERWEAR. 340 00:16:23,389 --> 00:16:25,013 EVERYONE WILL LOOK SO SILLY, 341 00:16:25,055 --> 00:16:26,180 YOU WON'T REMEMBER YOU'RE NERVOUS. 342 00:16:26,222 --> 00:16:28,139 WHICH IS WHY I INVENTED THESE. 343 00:16:28,180 --> 00:16:30,305 GOGGLES THAT LET YOU SEE PEOPLE IN THEIR UNDIES. 344 00:16:30,347 --> 00:16:32,305 OR I COULD JUST MAKE YOU A FAKE BOATING LICENSE. 345 00:16:32,347 --> 00:16:33,513 THAT'S STILL ILLEGAL. 346 00:16:33,555 --> 00:16:35,513 GIMME THE GOGGLES. 347 00:16:38,055 --> 00:16:39,264 IT'S NOT WORKING. 348 00:16:39,305 --> 00:16:40,596 - WELL, OF COURSE IT ISN'T, SILLY. 349 00:16:40,638 --> 00:16:42,139 I'M ONLY WEARING MY UNDIES. 350 00:16:42,180 --> 00:16:44,097 SEE IF THEY WORK ON PATRICK. 351 00:16:45,638 --> 00:16:47,389 - UGH. YEAH, THEY WORK. 352 00:16:50,264 --> 00:16:53,180 - AND THEY WERE NEVER HEARD FROM AGAIN. 353 00:16:53,222 --> 00:16:54,513 THANK YOU, BILLY. 354 00:16:54,555 --> 00:16:57,055 THAT WAS AN EXCELLENT REPORT. 355 00:16:57,097 --> 00:17:01,013 NEXT, WE HAVE SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS. 356 00:17:01,055 --> 00:17:02,055 AH-HMM. 357 00:17:02,097 --> 00:17:07,055 GO ON, BUDDY. 358 00:17:07,097 --> 00:17:09,888 AHEM. 359 00:17:10,930 --> 00:17:13,430 WELL, SPONGEBOB? 360 00:17:13,471 --> 00:17:15,389 DO YOU HAVE YOUR ORAL REPORT READY? 361 00:17:15,430 --> 00:17:17,721 - HUH? - THE ASSIGNMENT I GAVE YOU? 362 00:17:17,763 --> 00:17:20,513 THE ONE WHERE YOU TALK IN FRONT OF THE CLASS? 363 00:17:20,555 --> 00:17:23,139 - OH, YEAH! OF COURSE I'M READY. 364 00:17:23,180 --> 00:17:24,430 I CAN DO IT. 365 00:17:25,888 --> 00:17:26,847 UM... 366 00:17:35,513 --> 00:17:38,013 OH, NO. 367 00:17:38,055 --> 00:17:40,389 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 368 00:17:40,430 --> 00:17:43,013 - MRS. PUFF, DO I REALLY HAVE TO DO THIS? 369 00:17:43,055 --> 00:17:44,680 NO. 370 00:17:44,721 --> 00:17:47,680 ONLY IF YOU WANT TO PASS THIS CLASS. 371 00:17:47,721 --> 00:17:51,471 - OKAY. 372 00:17:51,513 --> 00:17:55,264 UM, MY REPORT IS ON... 373 00:17:57,222 --> 00:17:58,972 HEH, MUST BE LAST-MINUTE JITTERS. 374 00:18:07,222 --> 00:18:08,763 PATRICK, WHERE ARE THOSE GOGGLES? 375 00:18:08,805 --> 00:18:11,097 - HERE, LET ME POLISH 'EM UP FOR YA. 376 00:18:13,055 --> 00:18:14,389 HERE YOU GO. 377 00:18:14,430 --> 00:18:15,721 THANKS. 378 00:18:18,389 --> 00:18:22,055 HURRY UP! 379 00:18:22,097 --> 00:18:23,264 OH! 380 00:18:23,305 --> 00:18:26,389 HA! 381 00:18:26,430 --> 00:18:28,264 AH, IT'S WORKING! HA, HA, HA! 382 00:18:30,555 --> 00:18:32,305 - WHAT'S ALL THIS LAUGHING ABOUT? 383 00:18:32,347 --> 00:18:33,430 WELL, SPONGEBOB? 384 00:18:36,097 --> 00:18:37,347 HOO. 385 00:18:37,389 --> 00:18:39,222 BOATING SAFETY IS THE RESPONSIBILITY 386 00:18:39,264 --> 00:18:40,847 OF EVERY BOATER IN THE OCEAN BECAUSE— 387 00:18:45,847 --> 00:18:47,013 WELL, DON'T JUST STAND THERE. 388 00:18:47,055 --> 00:18:48,013 GET ON WITH IT. 389 00:18:48,055 --> 00:18:49,347 DAAAHHH! 390 00:18:53,013 --> 00:18:54,389 THEY'RE ALL STARING. 391 00:18:54,430 --> 00:18:57,347 WHOOOOA! 392 00:18:57,389 --> 00:18:59,139 HEY, WHERE YOU GOING? 393 00:18:59,180 --> 00:19:00,721 YOU FORGOT THE GOGGLES. 394 00:19:00,763 --> 00:19:02,347 SPONGEBOB, WAIT! 395 00:19:04,055 --> 00:19:06,305 WAIT, SPONGEBOB! 396 00:19:06,347 --> 00:19:07,680 YOU CAN'T TAKE MY BOAT. 397 00:19:07,721 --> 00:19:10,139 SPONGEBOB! 398 00:19:10,180 --> 00:19:14,097 WAIT! 399 00:19:14,139 --> 00:19:15,139 SPONGEBOB! 400 00:19:15,180 --> 00:19:19,013 GET BACK HERE WITH MY BOAT! 401 00:19:19,055 --> 00:19:20,305 YEA! 402 00:19:20,347 --> 00:19:21,305 YEAH! 403 00:19:31,596 --> 00:19:33,055 - TALK ABOUT A SLOW DAY AT THE OFFICE, HUH? 404 00:19:33,097 --> 00:19:35,097 YOU SAID IT, PARTNER. 405 00:19:35,139 --> 00:19:36,805 MY BATON'S ITCHING FOR THE NOGGIN 406 00:19:36,847 --> 00:19:38,264 OF A LAWBREAKER. 407 00:19:42,347 --> 00:19:44,180 OKAY, FORGET WHAT I JUST SAID. 408 00:19:50,471 --> 00:19:53,055 SPONGE, PULL OVER. 409 00:19:53,097 --> 00:19:55,389 I DON'T KNOW HOW! 410 00:19:57,389 --> 00:20:00,013 SPONGEBOB! 411 00:20:00,055 --> 00:20:02,389 AGH! 412 00:20:07,638 --> 00:20:09,513 ALL RIGHT, KID. 413 00:20:09,555 --> 00:20:11,305 WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT? 414 00:20:11,347 --> 00:20:14,222 - DON'T YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT BOATING SAFETY? 415 00:20:14,264 --> 00:20:17,013 BOATING SAFETY? 416 00:20:17,055 --> 00:20:19,513 YES, OFFICER, I DO. 417 00:20:19,555 --> 00:20:21,264 BOATING SAFETY IS THE RESPONSIBILITY 418 00:20:21,305 --> 00:20:23,305 OF EVERY BOATER IN THE WHOLE OCEAN. 419 00:20:23,347 --> 00:20:25,596 EACH BOATER MUST FOLLOW THE RULES AND REGULATIONS 420 00:20:25,638 --> 00:20:27,389 STIPULATED IN THE BOATER'S SAFETY HANDBOOK. 421 00:20:27,430 --> 00:20:29,097 LEARN THE MEANING OF ALL POSTED SIGNS. 422 00:20:29,139 --> 00:20:31,305 WHEN CONSIDERING SPEED LIMITS, 423 00:20:31,347 --> 00:20:33,847 PAY ATTENTION TO ONE'S SURROUNDINGS. BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. RED MEANS NO PARKING. 424 00:20:33,888 --> 00:20:35,055 ALWAYS OBEY AUTHORITY FIGURES. 425 00:20:35,097 --> 00:20:36,847 RESPECT THE RIGHTS OF PEDESTRIANS. 426 00:20:36,888 --> 00:20:38,222 ALWAYS BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, AND FAMILIARIZE YOURSELF 427 00:20:38,264 --> 00:20:39,389 WITH ALL SHADES OF CURB. 428 00:20:39,430 --> 00:20:41,264 BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. 429 00:20:41,305 --> 00:20:43,222 BLAH BLAH-BLAH BLAH. 430 00:20:43,264 --> 00:20:44,805 REMEMBER, BLAH, BLAH. 431 00:20:44,847 --> 00:20:46,513 A MOTOR VEHICLE IS 2,000 POUNDS OF BLAH BLAH. 432 00:20:46,555 --> 00:20:48,347 AND BLAH BLAH, IT'S IN YOUR BLAH. 433 00:20:48,389 --> 00:20:50,596 - GEE, KID. THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL. 434 00:20:50,638 --> 00:20:52,347 YEAH. 435 00:20:52,389 --> 00:20:54,680 I NEVER EVEN KNEW SOME OF THOSE THINGS MYSELF. 436 00:20:54,721 --> 00:20:55,680 AHA! 437 00:20:55,721 --> 00:20:57,389 FINALLY. 438 00:20:57,430 --> 00:20:59,471 THE LONG ARM OF THE LAW HAS CAUGHT UP WITH YOU. 439 00:20:59,513 --> 00:21:00,680 I GUESS I WON'T BE SEEING YOU 440 00:21:00,721 --> 00:21:02,888 IN MY DRIVER'S EDUCATION CLASS 441 00:21:02,930 --> 00:21:06,264 FOR THE NEXT 5 TO 10 YEARS. 442 00:21:08,513 --> 00:21:09,888 WAIT, WAIT, MISS CHUCKLES. 443 00:21:09,930 --> 00:21:12,139 DID YOU SAY YOU WERE HIS BOATING INSTRUCTOR? 444 00:21:12,180 --> 00:21:13,596 YES. WHY? 445 00:21:13,638 --> 00:21:16,222 - UNDER PENAL CODE 26-1, QUOTE, 446 00:21:16,264 --> 00:21:19,389 "THE BOATING INSTRUCTOR IS RESPONSIBLE—" 447 00:21:19,430 --> 00:21:20,471 - "FOR ANY MINOR'S DELINQUENT ACTIONS 448 00:21:20,513 --> 00:21:21,888 UNDER THAT TEACHER'S CARE." 449 00:21:21,930 --> 00:21:23,513 UNQUOTE. 450 00:21:23,555 --> 00:21:25,972 I'M AFRAID WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO TAKE YOU IN, MADAME. 451 00:21:26,013 --> 00:21:28,389 WHAT? 452 00:21:28,430 --> 00:21:29,638 NO! 453 00:21:31,347 --> 00:21:33,222 - HEY, BUDDY, YOU GOT OVER YOUR FEAR 454 00:21:33,264 --> 00:21:35,222 OF GIVING AN ORAL TALKING THING. 455 00:21:35,264 --> 00:21:36,180 HEY, I DID. 456 00:21:36,222 --> 00:21:37,555 THANKS, PAL. 457 00:21:37,596 --> 00:21:38,638 OH, THAT REMINDS ME. 458 00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:41,222 YOU FORGOT THESE. 459 00:21:41,264 --> 00:21:42,888 WHOA! 460 00:21:42,930 --> 00:21:45,013 OH, THEY REALLY WORK. 461 00:21:45,055 --> 00:21:47,847 - AND WHAT ARE YOU LOOKIN' AT? 462 00:21:47,888 --> 00:21:50,721 OH! AGH!