Reverend Buddy Boyle's "Goin' For Glory Hour."
When angels come a-knocking, let 'em on in.
Angles can't possess a human without permission, right?
Yep. So, what?
They're using this guy to find vessels?
It's a willing audience.
Who put Crowley in charge?
He's the king. He's a salesman.
Right now you and I are gonna talk about a regime change.
You're ours.
Your demon ass is going to be a mortal ass pretty damn quick.
Where do I start to even look for forgiveness?
How 'bout we start with this?
You're human?
Zeke?
Castiel cannot stay here.
He will bring the angels down on all of us.
He's warded.
He was warded when April found him.
Castiel is in danger.
And if he is here, I am in danger.
Wait, you're in danger?
If he stays,
I am afraid I will have no choice but to leave.
Cass, can we talk?
You can't stay.
Sir?
Sir, can you hear me?
Please ... please just say something.
Are you still there?
Keep talking, and I can help you through this.
Please, sir, if you can hear me, stay on the phone.
It may feel hopeless right now,
but you called the hotline for a reason.
There's some part of you that still wants to live ...
some part that knows suici...
Who are you?
Did the lady from the hotline send you?
No.
You did.
== sync, corrected by elderman == @elder_man
I know, and that play in the second quarter?
I mean, what team is he playing for?
Not ours.
High-five!
Morning, Steve. Bill.
High...
Five.
Sorry I'm late.
I had to drop the baby off at daycare,
then hit every red light on the way here,
but guess I shouldn't have worried.
Place looks great.
Coffee urns.
Uh, full. Dairy case.
Stocked.
Okay, Steve, last question ...
where have you been all my life?
You're not like the other sales associates.
There's... something different about you.
I can assure you there's ... there's not.
I know these things.
You're...
Mm. You're special.
That's your "big news"
is that you translated the tablet into...
Doodles?
It's cuneiform.
I-I hit a wall translating the tablet into English.
But I found an ancient codex
linking the Angel script to proto-Elamite cuneiform,
and I was able to translate the tablet
and the footnotes into Elamite, which is ...
Doodles.
It's extinct.
Well, can you read it?
No one can.
Scholars have tried for centuries.
So it's a dead end?
N-not quite.
Now, most proto-Elamite is abstract,
but I was able to decipher
one phrase from Metatron's footnotes.
"Falling angels."
Okay, so, the footnotes refer to Metatron's spell?
Maybe.
Okay.
Well, maybe if we can decipher the footnotes,
then we can reverse the spell and...
Punt those winged dicks back to heaven.
Where do we start?
Research.
We comb through the library,
see if we can find anything else on Elamite.
"Zimmerman's encyclopedia of extinct languages volume 1:
Adai to Atakapa."
How many volumes are there?
24.
Don't worry, we've got them all.
Awesome.
There is a God.
Hello.
I may have a case for you.
Four missing in Rexford, Idaho.
Presumed dead,
but no bodies have been released to loved ones.
And there were reports
of a strange substance at the scenes.
Oh, well, hello to you too, Cass.
How are you?
I... am busy.
All right. So, how do you want to do this?
You want to meet up at the latest scene?
You want me to pick you up? What?
Um, I've got my hands full over here.
I just ... um...
Cass? Hello?
thought you would want to know about the case.
Hey, are you sure everything's ...
Okay.
So, he said nothing about where he is
or ... or what he's been doing?
This is Cass.
In case you forgot, he's not exactly chatty Cathy.
And you're not even gonna see him when you're in Idaho?
Well, like I said, as long as he's catnip for angels,
he's keeping his distance.
So ... then what's the point, Dean?
I mean, it's barely even a case.
That's why I'm just gonna go have a little look-see,
and we're not gonna waste a whole lot of manpower
on a big pile of nada.
In other words, a perfect excuse to bail out on research.
You got me.
Hey, Steve?
I found this in the supply closet.
Do you know whose it is?
Um...
That's mine.
Thanks.
I also found a rolled-up sleeping bag
behind the tool locker.
Yes, I wanted to be thorough with inventory,
so I worked late last week,
and taking a nap here was easier than going back home to my bed.
Which I-I have, of course ...
a bed... and a home.
Wow, Steve.
You're so...
responsible.
I've been afraid to ask.
I-I don't want to take advantage of you as my employee,
and I certainly don't want to jeopardize
our working relationship.
But as a working single mom,
it's hard enough to get a date,
let alone meet a really great guy.
And tomorrow's my night off, and I know you're off, too,
and I was just wondering if there's any chance you're...
free tomorrow night?
Um...
Yes?
Yes.
You're the best!
So, uh, four missing?
Four dead. Just got confirmation.
And, uh, any common threads you can think of?
Well, Joe in there
had the suicide hotline on speed dial.
The gal before him was a shut-in.
Had enough antidepressants in her medicine cabinet
to stock a pharmacy.
The first victims ...
a married couple out of Sugar City.
Pretty much a walking billboard for no-fault divorce.
Were they all basket cases?
If you asked me to make a list of this county's saddest sacks,
these four would've been right on top.
All right, so, four unhappy people,
one of them definitely suicidal.
But you've ruled out suicide?
You're gonna want to put these on.
This look like suicide to you?
Blood?
If the tests come back same as the others,
it's everything.
Blood, skin, hair, nails. Internal organs.
Even clothing fibers ...
like these poor souls
got run through the world's finest wood-chipper.
What about witnesses?
Same as the rest.
Neighbors reported some kind of a pink flash.
By the time we got here, all that was left was...
this.
Yeah, we're almost through the texts over here.
We got nothing.
Have you tried Professor Morrison?
Yeah, he's unreachable.
He took a sabbatical
to live amongst the Trobrianders of Papua New Guinea.
Needless to say, we're pretty burnt.
Well, there's one guy there
who is nothing notifl-rested.
Crowley? I'm just saying.
We're not keeping him chained up for the one-liners.
It's worth a shot, I guess.
Just be careful, all right?
Don't fall for any of his "quid pro quo" crap.
Noted.
So, what about you?
How's Cass' lead panning out?
Four victims suddenly exploded.
I tried EMF.
I've looked for hex bags, sulfur ... nada.
Spontaneous combustion?
Maybe the Thules?
No, no, no. I already ruled them out.
The bodies were vaporized. They weren't burned.
That sounds like a real case.
Dean, I should be there.
No, man. That's ... that's uh... not necessary.
No, I, uh ...
I got this one covered.
He dumped me, Jace.
In the cafeteria.
In front of everyone.
It's just like... Who does that, you know?
Like, why couldn't he just dump me on Facebook
like a normal person?
I've been destroyed.
Socially and romantically totaled.
I know. Just so embarrassed, Jace.
I could just die.
I can help with that.
What?
Thanks.
Good day, ma'am.
And good luck!
I'll have some beef jerky and a pack of menthols.
What are you doing here?
Gee, it's nice to see you, too, Cass.
It's Steve now.
And... you ... you surprised me.
Well, the feeling is mutual.
I mean, I knew you had to lay low from the angel threat,
but, uh, wow! This is some cover.
My Grace is gone.
What did you expect?
Do you have any idea how hard it was?
When I fell to earth, I didn't just lose my powers.
I ...
I had nothing.
Now...
I'm a sales associate.
A sales associate? Hey, Steve. Sign here?
I'm responsible for inventory, sales, customer service.
I keep this place ...
thank you ... thank you.
Clean and presentable.
And when my manager's busy, I even prepare the food.
Wow.
So you went from fighting heavenly battles
to nuking taquitos?
Nachos too.
I've been politely asking for reading material for weeks,
and this is what you bring me?
Pass.
Can you read Elamite or not?
It's by no means my favorite of the ancient tongues,
but yes.
Will you help us read it?
Why on earth would I?
Because I was there that night.
I saw what humanity did to you.
Like it or not, there's a little part of you
that's not a douche.
Sorry, moose.
To the last drop.
Crowley, the only reason you're alive
is because my brother thought you would be useful.
So far, you've done Jack.
Back to plan "B," I guess.
Which is?
Give you up to Abaddon.
You think you can threaten me with that hack?
She's all fury, no finesse.
I'm not so sure.
Our last encounter with Abaddon, she was, uh ...
she was pretty terrifying.
Scarier than you've been in years.
Bring that to me.
This is not you, man. You are above this.
Come on.
No, Dean.
I'm not.
I failed at being an angel.
Everything I ever attempted came out wrong.
But here, at least I have a shot at getting things right.
I guess you can't see it,
but there's a real dignity in what I do ...
a human dignity.
Hate to interrupt you guys, but, Steve?
Customer had an accident in the men's room.
I'm on it.
Oh, and tonight ...
7:00 at my place work for you?
Great.
You're the best!
That's what this is about!
What?
The girl.
No, Dean. It's not.
Nora ...
she's a very nice woman,
I'm pretty sure she's not a reaper intent on killing me,
and she's asked me out.
Going on dates ...
that's something humans do, right?
Yeah. I mean, my dates usually end
when I run out of singles,
but, uh, yeah.
Yeah, that's something that humans do.
This is Agent Lee Ermey.
I'll be right there.
There was another kill ... over at the high school.
You comin'?
I wouldn't be much use.
I don't have my powers.
So? I've never had powers.
You are a hunter.
And you're a hunter in training, remember?
Yeah, I remember.
You said I sucked.
I didn't say that.
I said that there was, uh, uh, you know,
"room for improvement."
Come on.
All right, my shift's over in five minutes,
and my date's not until later, so...
Attaboy!
I'll go get the car.
Not just yet.
I have to clean the bathroom.
One second we're talking,
and the next, she just... stops.
And then everyone in the cafeteria freaks,
rushing and pointing out the window, at ...
Could ... could that really be her?
And nobody saw anybody else at the scene ...
a man, woman, anything unusual?
Your friend, was she, uh, depressed?
Depressed?
Any thoughts of suicide?
Ew. No.
I mean, she was kind of bummed
that dick-bag Travis broke up with her
in front of the whole school.
Kind of bummed?
Yeah.
Like more bummed than when she got a "C" on a quiz,
and...
less bummed than when her parents split up.
Kind of... bummed.
Excuse me.
Cass, what's wrong?
I've seen this before.
What? Where?
In heaven.
What, you're saying an angel did this?
It's no ordinary angel.
Dean, this is bad.
This is very bad.
On the battlefields of Heaven,
there was a special class of angel, the Rit Zien.
It's Enochian for "Hands of Mercy."
They functioned like medics.
They tended to the wounded.
They healed those who could be healed,
but for the mortally wounded, those who were past saving,
the Rit Zien's job was to put them down.
But the granulated bodies?
This was their special ability.
They had this way of smiting that was so quick and so total
that it rendered death virtually painless.
Yeah, but these aren't wounded angels
that they're vaporizing,
they're people.
Right. I don't know.
The Rit Zien home in on pain, it's like a beacon to them.
So, when this angel fell to earth,
he heard the victims' cries, their anguish,
same as he'd hear an angel's in heaven.
He's continuing his heavenly work down here.
One suffering human at a time.
Yeah, but this last victim was not suffering.
She was just a normal, moody kid.
But he just got here.
The ebb and flow of human emotion ...
Dean, I've been on earth for a few years,
and I've only begun to grasp it.
To him, pain is pain.
So everybody's fair game?
All right, well, we got to stop him.
You have to stop him.
You're scared.
It's different now, Dean. Everything feels different.
You're right.
All right, I'll track down this, uh, Kevorkian wannabe,
and I'll put him down.
Okay.
You stay safe.
Go on that date, all right?
Go live a normal life.
Okay.
Well?
I need a ride.
Right.
I'll do it.
But I want something in return.
Yeah, what's that?
A telephone call.
Come on, moose.
Even Dahmer got one telephone call.
Seriously?
You want to let Crowley communicate with Abaddon?
A king and a power-mad knight of hell isn't enough for you?
Want to throw a demonic team-up into the mix?
I don't think so.
I mean, I don't trust Crowley, either.
But I can't honestly see him working with Abaddon.
He hates her too much.
You said it. You can't trust him.
We don't have to.
Look, Crowley's bound.
We can end the call whenever we want.
Even if he wanted to give Abaddon information,
he has none to give her.
He doesn't even know where the bunker is.
He says he can decrypt the translation?
What if he's lying?
You're right.
We're gonna need proof.
What are these?
Ingredients.
More specific.
Ingredients for a spell.
Heart of a Nephilim.
Cupid's bow.
Grace of an angel.
And the rest of them.
Phone call.
You'll get the rest when I get paid.
Now, who's gonna be a dear and open up a vein?
Okay.
Thanks, Dean.
Cass.
Wait.
I can't let you do this.
What?
You're gonna wear that on a date?
This is all I have, Dean.
Okay. Uh, lose the vest.
What are you ... Lose the vest.
Come on.
That's a little better. All right.
There we go. All right.
And now your buttons ...
why don't you unbutton it?
Okay.
Th-that's far enough, Tony Manero.
Um...
Yeah. Good. All right.
Listen to me.
Always open the door for her, okay?
Ask a lot of questions.
They like that.
And, uh... oh, if she says she's happy to go Dutch,
she's lying.
All right?
Go get 'em, tiger.
Nice touch.
What are you doing, jackass?
Hey!
Steve! I'm so glad you're here.
Come in.
I thought I was gonna be late!
Late for what?
My date.
Bowling, would you believe it?
But damned if I'm not dressing fancy,
even for bowling.
Haven't had an excuse to doll up since Tanya was born.
And there she is, my little angel.
Now, she's already been fed,
she'll probably sleep the whole time,
and I'll only be gone a couple of hours.
I just couldn't get my usual sitter,
and I needed somebody here just in case she wakes up
and starts crying, which she won't, I promise.
Baby Tanya never cries.
Wish me luck.
Oh, and thank you. You really are the best.
Babysitting.
A-bup-bup-bup.
What?
Not yours. His.
What difference does it make?
I've had yours.
Stuck in here,
you can't fault me for wanting a little variety.
No way!
What's wrong, Short Round?
Afraid of needles?
No, I just have a policy of not giving blood
to anyone who's murdered my mother.
I have nothing but time.
You're a dick.
Good luck with that translation.
Inferni sectatores, nunc audite regem.
This is Crowley.
Connect me to ...
Crowley.
Bad connection.
Crowley. Your king.
If you don't connect me to Abaddon right away,
I will be forced to ...
What? What happened?
I've been placed on hold.
Hello?
Um...
Please ... please don't.
Okay.
Okay, okay. How 'bout ...
how 'bout a lullaby?
Um...
Okay. Shh. Shh!
Shh.
I know, I know.
Sheriff?
Now, here's a wrinkle.
Our first crime scene, married couple?
Full analysis of the spray came in from the lab.
Turns out it only contains the wife's DNA.
The husband's still out there.
Nobody told you. Nobody explained.
You're just shoved out
kicking and screaming into this human life,
without any idea why any of it feels the way it feels,
or why this confusion, which feels like
it's a hair's breadth from terror or pain.
You know, just when you think you do understand,
it'll turn out you're wrong.
You didn't understand anything at all.
Guess that's just how it is when you're new at this.
You know, it wasn't that long ago
when all I'd need to do to ease your pain was touch you.
You're very warm.
Is that normal?
Oh. Shh. Shh. Shh. Shh.
He was already a bit screwy, but then he found religion.
She was a hard-line atheist, no peach herself.
When he got himself obsessed with this Buddy Boyle whack job,
an already bad marriage got worse.
Kept telling her to "Let God in."
Buddy Boyle. That explains it.
Explains what?
Never mind. Let's see.
Is that his truck?
Yep.
Cass.
Nora, she's hot. She's really hot.
Please just call ... call me. Call ... call back.
If I don't hear back, I'm taking her to the hospital.
Okay, Tanya, we're taking a little walk.
Hello, Castiel.
Squalid little dump.
No wonder she cries.
It's a fever, Ephraim. It will pass.
You remember my name?
I was just a nobody when we met,
but you ... you were a legend.
You've been here before.
This is my first time, and it's...
Intense.
You know, there's a lot you don't understand
about humanity at first.
If you would just stop ...
Stop?
I won't stop
until I wash the planet clean of all suffering.
Allow me.
Don't... touch... her.
You think I came for her?
No, Castiel. I came for you.
How long's it take to transfer a demonic phone call?
Can it, moose.
Crowley, you got your call. Yeah, it's time.
It's time when I bloody well say it's time!
Hello, Abaddon.
Crowley, how in the hell are you?
So much pain and despair,
so many voices begging out for relief.
How'd you find me?
Because you're warded?
The same way I find all my patients ...
I just followed the sound of your pain.
You have no idea how loud it is.
I could hear you for miles.
Do you really think you're doing Heaven's work down here?
I know I am.
You're wrong.
Earth can be a hard place.
But these humans, they can get better.
They're just doing the best they can.
Is that what you think you're doing, Castiel ...
the best you can?
Well, I'm sorry.
But if this is the best that the famed Castiel can do,
you're a more urgent case than I thought.
I used to admire you.
You failed more often than you succeeded.
But at least you played big.
Now what are you doing?
Burying your head in the sand.
Right when your kind needs you the most.
How are the numbers?
You mean souls?
I've managed to double on your projections.
Now, how did I ever pull off such a feat?
You're taking souls before their time.
Voiding my contracts.
That's right.
I'm taking it all down, brick by brick.
It's over.
The days of Crowley, the king of bureaucrats, are done.
Shhh. It'll be over soon.
I'll take the pain away.
I want to live.
But as what, Castiel? As an angel or a man?
You...
Ganky...
Putrescent...
Skanger.
It may look like bean-counting to you,
it may lack a certain adolescent flair,
but my way... Works!
You think you can control Hell with chaos alone,
without the support of those who are still loyal to me?
No one's seen you in weeks, and last I saw you,
Howdy and Doody had you tied up nice and tight.
Seems to reason, they've turned you into a kennel dog.
How does it feel, Crowley,
to be the Winchesters' bitch?
It's been fun indulging in your bluffs,
but we both know you have no real authority left,
no leverage, you have nothing to offer me.
You have nothing.
Your way will backfire.
You will burn.
I can't wait.
Crowley?
Bring me the translations.
I keep my agreements.
"Obtain the ingredients ... heart, bow, Grace."
Blah, blah, blah.
"Mix until the smoke shall rise from the ashes
casting the angels from heaven."
Blah, blah ... oh.
Hm.
It's irreversible.
What?
The spell can't be undone.
The new world order ...
we're stuck with it.
You say you want to live.
But you can't see what I see.
By choosing a human life, you've already given up.
You chose death.
Well, there's no way. Crowley's lying.
No, Dean, not this time.
Look, Metatron built the spell
to withstand any attempt to reverse it.
There is no putting the angels back in Heaven.
It's done.
Are you gonna tell Cass?
I'm, uh, sorry I overreacted.
My friend gave me a tip.
A low dose of acetaminophen brought the fever right down.
Oh, that's okay. Date was a bust anyway.
Steve?
The part of you that overreacted,
that cares so much?
That's what makes you special.
I got to go.
Where to, Cass?
Listen, Cass, back at the bunker,
I, uh...
Sorry I told you to go.
I know it's been hard on you, you know, on your own.
Somehow you're adapting.
I'm proud of you.
Thank you, Dean.
But there's something Ephraim said.
The angels ... they need help.
Can I really sit this out?
Shouldn't I be searching for a way to get them home?
Me and Sam, we'll take care of the angels.
You're human now.
It's not your problem anymore.
== sync, corrected by elderman == @elder_man
It's been weeks since the massive meteor storm,
yet Idaho falls astronomers
still have unanswered questions.
NASA and Washington
are both continuing to study the phenomenon.