1 00:00:17,809 --> 00:00:20,521 The audience at home has voted. 2 00:00:20,604 --> 00:00:25,609 Danthony, Jamie. One of you will go home tonight. 3 00:00:25,692 --> 00:00:28,237 The other will continue his lustful journey. 4 00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:30,822 Better call your nan, mate. Tell her to put the kettle on. 5 00:00:37,621 --> 00:00:38,622 Jamie. 6 00:00:44,670 --> 00:00:45,838 The lust stops here. 7 00:00:47,339 --> 00:00:48,590 I'm sorry. 8 00:00:50,133 --> 00:00:51,301 Whoo-hoo! Yes! 9 00:00:51,385 --> 00:00:52,386 What? 10 00:00:52,469 --> 00:00:55,264 - Thank you. Oy, thank you! - Wow. 11 00:00:55,347 --> 00:00:57,558 - It's bull****. - Thank you! 12 00:01:00,102 --> 00:01:01,770 That is an absolute shocker. 13 00:01:01,854 --> 00:01:02,855 Unlucky, really. 14 00:01:02,938 --> 00:01:06,650 Yeah, but we are lucky to have with us, here in the studio, loser, Jamie. 15 00:01:06,733 --> 00:01:09,820 Easy, Phillip. I'm not just a loser, I'm the loser. 16 00:01:09,903 --> 00:01:13,282 Well, Jamie, look, first things first, will you keep your promise to Amy? 17 00:01:13,365 --> 00:01:15,409 - Are you gonna wait for her? - Nah, no. 18 00:01:15,492 --> 00:01:17,870 I was just playing a game, do you know what I mean? 19 00:01:17,953 --> 00:01:19,079 Find the fittest girl there, 20 00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:21,832 have sex with her in the toilet, ask her to marry ya. Strategy. 21 00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:26,837 Well, speaking of strategy, you decided to leave your club, Man City, 22 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:29,339 right at the start of their season. So why? 23 00:01:30,132 --> 00:01:32,176 Just something I had to do, do you know what I mean? 24 00:01:32,259 --> 00:01:35,345 The second that I found out that George Harrison had died, 25 00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:38,348 I realized that I had to stop waiting for life to begin. 26 00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:40,851 Start taking chances. Living life to the fullest. 27 00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:44,021 But George Harrison died 20 years ago. 28 00:01:44,646 --> 00:01:46,273 Yeah, but I only just found out. 29 00:01:48,817 --> 00:01:50,485 So what's next for Jamie Tartt? 30 00:01:50,986 --> 00:01:54,364 Don't know. Back to Man City. If Pep will have me, that is. 31 00:01:54,448 --> 00:01:56,450 It's funny you mention that 'cause we've got a clip. 32 00:01:56,533 --> 00:01:58,076 You might find this quite interesting. 33 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:01,163 Any thoughts on Jamie Tartt and his future with Manchester City? 34 00:02:01,246 --> 00:02:02,873 Yes, Jamie. 35 00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:06,585 You know, my wife and I thought he and Amy were meant for each other. 36 00:02:07,211 --> 00:02:09,880 But no, he won't be coming back to Man City. 37 00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:11,131 We wish him luck. 38 00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:21,517 Well, thanks for stopping by, Jamie. Good to see you, as always. 39 00:02:21,600 --> 00:02:23,769 When we come back, have scientists really discovered 40 00:02:23,852 --> 00:02:25,812 low-fat custard that doesn't make you sad? 41 00:02:25,896 --> 00:02:27,147 Sounds too good to be true. 42 00:02:35,614 --> 00:02:38,575 Hey! Jamie! Jamie! 43 00:02:38,659 --> 00:02:40,911 Yeah, yeah. Of course, yeah. 44 00:02:42,246 --> 00:02:44,331 - Thank you so much... - Yeah. All right, yeah. 45 00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:46,041 - How's it going, yeah? - You all right, bro? 46 00:02:46,124 --> 00:02:48,669 - Yeah. - Sorry you got sacked, man. 47 00:02:48,752 --> 00:02:51,380 It's how the crisp crumbles. 48 00:02:51,463 --> 00:02:56,552 Thanks, man. Thanks, bruv. There. Nah, you good, man. Yeah, yeah. 49 00:02:56,635 --> 00:02:57,761 Hello, mate. How you doing? 50 00:02:57,845 --> 00:02:59,304 - What's your name? - Stanley. 51 00:02:59,388 --> 00:03:01,431 Stanley. And you like football, yeah? 52 00:03:01,515 --> 00:03:03,809 - Thank you, Jamie. - All right. No worries, man. Yeah. 53 00:03:03,892 --> 00:03:05,894 All right, see ya later. Nice to meet ya. 54 00:03:08,188 --> 00:03:10,858 I actually think I'm gonna walk, mate. Yeah? Nice one. 55 00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:41,305 Hold on. You slept here last night? 56 00:03:41,847 --> 00:03:42,931 Why? 57 00:03:43,015 --> 00:03:46,018 Jane and I got in a fight last night, and she threw my keys in the river. 58 00:03:46,101 --> 00:03:49,229 Hey, you two are like Frank Sinatra and Ava Gardner, you know? 59 00:03:49,313 --> 00:03:53,775 Or Frank Sinatra and Mia Farrow. Or Frank and— Actually, you know what? 60 00:03:53,859 --> 00:03:57,070 I'm starting to realize that Ol' Blue Eyes might've skewed mercurial. 61 00:03:58,071 --> 00:03:59,781 - Hey, what time is it? - 9:20. 62 00:04:00,449 --> 00:04:02,034 Right. I'll be back. 63 00:04:02,117 --> 00:04:05,162 No, no, no. Smell this. 64 00:04:06,413 --> 00:04:07,539 A Parisian bedroom. 65 00:04:11,835 --> 00:04:13,003 Will, a word. 66 00:04:20,302 --> 00:04:22,596 - Yeah, come in. - You all right? 67 00:04:22,679 --> 00:04:23,680 No, I'm not all right. 68 00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:26,058 Did you put lavender-scented fabric softener in the laundry? 69 00:04:26,141 --> 00:04:27,142 Yes. Yes, I did. 70 00:04:27,226 --> 00:04:30,145 My girlfriend loves lavender. She finds it very calming. 71 00:04:32,898 --> 00:04:35,192 Don't make changes that could throw off a player's headspace. 72 00:04:35,275 --> 00:04:36,693 Sorry, Coach. 73 00:04:36,777 --> 00:04:37,903 Go. Get out. 74 00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:43,700 We don't want calm athletes. We want killer athletes. 75 00:04:43,784 --> 00:04:44,993 Even after they shower? 76 00:04:46,453 --> 00:04:47,454 Did you sleep here? 77 00:04:47,538 --> 00:04:49,206 "Perchance to dream here." 78 00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:53,544 Thanks for the ride, babe. Do you wanna pop in? Say hi? 79 00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:55,045 - No. - Okay. 80 00:04:56,046 --> 00:04:57,130 What you got planned today? 81 00:04:57,714 --> 00:04:59,424 Nothing till the match later. 82 00:04:59,925 --> 00:05:02,970 I'm going to get the girls to run a 4-4-2 diamond formation 83 00:05:03,053 --> 00:05:07,307 'cause that little Kokoruda girl is a fucking beast in defense. 84 00:05:08,100 --> 00:05:10,352 Then I was going to cook you cordon bleu for dinner. 85 00:05:10,435 --> 00:05:13,981 Nigella says if you butterfly the chicken, it'll be more moist. 86 00:05:14,565 --> 00:05:16,733 I don't know what does it for me more, 87 00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:19,611 you mentioning Nigella or using the word "moist." 88 00:05:22,656 --> 00:05:23,657 Yeah! 89 00:05:23,740 --> 00:05:26,076 - Yeah, all right. This is good. - What is Ted doing? 90 00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:29,663 He's probably homesick. Closest thing he can find to a Dodge Ram. 91 00:05:30,497 --> 00:05:32,708 - Good luck with the match, yeah? - I appreciate you. 92 00:05:34,793 --> 00:05:35,794 Morning, Ted! 93 00:05:35,878 --> 00:05:39,339 Hi, Keeley! Uh-oh, is that big, bad Roy Kent in there? 94 00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:42,801 Sorry. He's in a big rush. 95 00:05:42,885 --> 00:05:45,262 That's okay. Hey, you know, "mime is money," right? 96 00:05:46,138 --> 00:05:48,348 - That looked like fun. - Oh, yeah. No, that's a blast. 97 00:05:48,432 --> 00:05:51,518 And it's good for my sciatica too. The vibrations really help out my butt. 98 00:05:52,186 --> 00:05:54,438 - Wow. - Hey, look who's here. 99 00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:55,522 Hey. 100 00:05:57,149 --> 00:05:58,901 That's a cool bike. 101 00:06:00,110 --> 00:06:01,904 That's not a bike, that's a transformer. 102 00:06:01,987 --> 00:06:04,531 Yeah, she really is more than meets the eye, ain't she. 103 00:06:04,615 --> 00:06:06,742 Hey, Doc ... tor Sharon! 104 00:06:06,825 --> 00:06:07,910 Good morning. 105 00:06:07,993 --> 00:06:11,038 What's she doing back here, I wonder? Don't we have direct deposit? 106 00:06:11,121 --> 00:06:13,999 I thought Higgins hired her for the rest of the season, didn't he? 107 00:06:19,546 --> 00:06:22,758 Hey, Higgins. Did you hire Dr. Sharon without running it by me first? 108 00:06:22,841 --> 00:06:24,092 Yes. I thought it couldn't hurt. 109 00:06:24,176 --> 00:06:26,470 But I should've asked you first, Ted. You're absolutely right. 110 00:06:26,553 --> 00:06:28,013 No, I'm dead wrong. 111 00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:30,557 I mean, heck, you're Director of Football Operations. 112 00:06:30,641 --> 00:06:32,601 You gotta be able to make your own decisions. 113 00:06:32,684 --> 00:06:34,228 Still, you should've texted me first. 114 00:06:34,311 --> 00:06:36,146 - That's 100% true. - No, 1,000% false! 115 00:06:36,230 --> 00:06:37,606 I mean, you're a busy man! 116 00:06:37,689 --> 00:06:39,525 Whatever path you think is best is gonna be best! 117 00:06:39,608 --> 00:06:43,195 Still, next time you have plans, I want you to run 'em by me first. Okay? 118 00:06:43,946 --> 00:06:47,241 - No, I will not. - Good! Why should you? I ain't your daddy. 119 00:06:47,824 --> 00:06:49,993 Okay, great. We got ourselves a new member of the team. 120 00:06:50,077 --> 00:06:51,411 That's fine. I ain't got no— 121 00:06:51,495 --> 00:06:53,288 Why's it smell like my nana's house in here? 122 00:06:54,498 --> 00:06:55,499 Oh, Ted. 123 00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:58,502 - Wait until you hear this shit. - Do tell, Ricky Bell. 124 00:07:02,631 --> 00:07:03,632 No one wants you. 125 00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:08,095 What you mean no one wants me? I'm Jamie fucking Tartt. 126 00:07:08,178 --> 00:07:10,556 You're too much of a liability. 127 00:07:10,639 --> 00:07:12,975 You act like an asshole and disappear on Man City. 128 00:07:13,559 --> 00:07:15,978 Then you act like an asshole and cheat on Amy with Denise 129 00:07:16,061 --> 00:07:17,187 by having Jacuzzi sex. 130 00:07:18,105 --> 00:07:19,731 No one wants you. 131 00:07:19,815 --> 00:07:22,109 What about a team in Spain or Germany? 132 00:07:23,026 --> 00:07:25,279 Hello, Real Madrid? Do you want Jamie Tartt? 133 00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:28,448 No. Okay, thank you. See? 134 00:07:28,532 --> 00:07:30,033 You weren't even speaking Spanish. 135 00:07:30,117 --> 00:07:34,371 Maybe it's time for you to focus on your television career. 136 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,874 This is Tracey, your new talent agent. 137 00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:40,419 You have an amazing offer for a new reality show in Ibiza. 138 00:07:40,502 --> 00:07:43,714 How do you feel about taking ecstasy every night for three straight weeks? 139 00:07:48,385 --> 00:07:49,386 You gotta help me, man. 140 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:52,264 Jamie, you know you're like a son to me. 141 00:07:53,098 --> 00:07:56,476 Now you're like a dead son, which means I love you even more. 142 00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:00,272 There's nothing I can do. 143 00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:10,490 Ted Lasso Welcome Wagon has arrived. 144 00:08:10,574 --> 00:08:13,952 Please don't barge in here like that. I could have been in a session. 145 00:08:14,036 --> 00:08:16,622 Oh, right. Of course, I'm sorry. 146 00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:19,499 - Can I help you with something? - Well, yeah. No, I— 147 00:08:19,583 --> 00:08:22,252 I brought you a little somethin' somethin' for your first day at work. 148 00:08:22,336 --> 00:08:24,254 - No, thank you. - Come on, now. 149 00:08:24,338 --> 00:08:25,797 Just try a little bite, huh? 150 00:08:29,426 --> 00:08:30,511 There you go. 151 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:39,937 That's very thoughtful, Coach Lasso. But I don't eat sugar. 152 00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:43,106 Really? Wow. I've never met someone who doesn't eat sugar. 153 00:08:43,190 --> 00:08:44,191 Only heard about 'em, 154 00:08:44,274 --> 00:08:46,818 and they all live in this godless place called Santa Monica. 155 00:08:46,902 --> 00:08:49,321 Trust me, it's in everyone's best interest. 156 00:08:49,404 --> 00:08:52,157 In a past life, I would inhale a Cadbury's Flake, 157 00:08:52,241 --> 00:08:54,409 talk nonsense for an hour until I passed out. 158 00:08:54,493 --> 00:08:56,787 - I'm the same way with video games. - How so? 159 00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:59,581 You know, it's just something in my life that I really enjoy. 160 00:08:59,665 --> 00:09:01,667 But then I pretend that preventing myself from having 'em 161 00:09:01,750 --> 00:09:03,085 is somehow making my life better. 162 00:09:03,669 --> 00:09:05,087 But in reality, 163 00:09:05,170 --> 00:09:08,006 all I'm doing is depriving myself of something that makes me happy, 164 00:09:08,090 --> 00:09:10,133 instead of attempting to adjust my relationship to it. 165 00:09:11,510 --> 00:09:13,053 Hey, what's your favorite book? 166 00:09:15,806 --> 00:09:16,974 This is interesting. 167 00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:18,684 What is? That my answer's The Fountainhead? 168 00:09:18,767 --> 00:09:20,519 I know, curveball, right? I can explain— 169 00:09:20,602 --> 00:09:21,728 No, what you're doing here. 170 00:09:21,812 --> 00:09:24,940 This is obviously your way of connecting with new people. 171 00:09:25,524 --> 00:09:28,068 Makes sense. It's very disarming. 172 00:09:29,486 --> 00:09:33,448 If it's okay with you, Coach Lasso, I'd like to observe training today. 173 00:09:33,532 --> 00:09:35,284 See how everything's functioning. 174 00:09:36,702 --> 00:09:37,786 Yeah, no, of course. 175 00:09:37,870 --> 00:09:40,080 Yeah, you got a backstage pass. Full access. 176 00:09:40,581 --> 00:09:41,582 Thank you. 177 00:09:44,209 --> 00:09:45,210 Okay. 178 00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:49,131 Oh, hey, you know what I— 179 00:09:50,632 --> 00:09:53,302 And I will let you know what the people from Dubai Air say. 180 00:09:53,886 --> 00:09:55,554 All right, you got any questions for me? 181 00:09:56,054 --> 00:10:00,267 Is it tacky to say I'm rich on an online dating profile? 182 00:10:00,350 --> 00:10:02,394 Only if you put the word "filthy" in front of it. 183 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:09,234 Sorry, sorry. 184 00:10:09,318 --> 00:10:11,695 Higgins, it's very kind that you gave your office to Sharon. 185 00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:16,074 Yes, it's very club-first mentality, Leslie, 186 00:10:16,158 --> 00:10:18,744 but you really should have an office, preferably your own. 187 00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:20,204 No, you're absolutely right. 188 00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:24,333 It's just very hard to kick an employee out of their workplace home. 189 00:10:24,416 --> 00:10:25,959 It's only temporary. 190 00:10:26,043 --> 00:10:28,670 What about... Caroline in ad sales? 191 00:10:28,754 --> 00:10:30,714 No, she's going through a breakup. 192 00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:33,342 Plus, she's right next door to Laughing Liam. 193 00:10:33,425 --> 00:10:34,676 Lovely man, but... 194 00:10:39,598 --> 00:10:42,226 Hey, Higgins. Who's your new friend here? 195 00:10:42,309 --> 00:10:44,811 Oh, hi, Robert. My name's Ted. Yep. 196 00:10:44,895 --> 00:10:47,231 Hey, my name's Jimmy. 197 00:10:47,898 --> 00:10:48,899 Jimmy Paper? 198 00:10:49,733 --> 00:10:53,237 Page! I goofed that. I'm sorry, that was a great one. Dang it. 199 00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:54,613 Hey, boss. 200 00:10:54,696 --> 00:10:56,990 - Here you go. - Thank you. 201 00:10:58,909 --> 00:10:59,910 What's this? 202 00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:01,995 I tried to give your biscuits to Dr. Sharon. 203 00:11:02,079 --> 00:11:04,873 - You did what? - Evidently she doesn't eat sugar. 204 00:11:04,957 --> 00:11:06,667 - What a fucking asshole. - Yeah. 205 00:11:06,750 --> 00:11:08,335 You ever been to a therapist, Rebecca? 206 00:11:08,418 --> 00:11:10,712 What for? I can diagnose myself in a heartbeat. 207 00:11:10,796 --> 00:11:12,673 I thought being invulnerable would protect me, 208 00:11:12,756 --> 00:11:15,717 so I pushed people away for years, leading me directly to my greatest fear: 209 00:11:15,801 --> 00:11:17,010 Being alone. Big whoop. 210 00:11:17,094 --> 00:11:18,637 Big whoop, yeah. I don't get it. 211 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:21,139 Why pay someone to do what a friend should do for you for free? 212 00:11:21,223 --> 00:11:23,892 Exactly. I mean, that's why you have friends, isn't it? 213 00:11:23,976 --> 00:11:26,562 To burden them with your issues and anxieties, right? 214 00:11:26,645 --> 00:11:27,855 Right. Yeah. 215 00:11:27,938 --> 00:11:30,566 Yeah. Speaking of, you got anything you wanna get off your chest? 216 00:11:31,650 --> 00:11:33,819 No. You? 217 00:11:36,363 --> 00:11:37,364 No. 218 00:11:41,076 --> 00:11:43,120 - See, there you have it. - Exactly. Yeah, okay. 219 00:11:43,954 --> 00:11:44,955 See you later, boss. 220 00:11:50,169 --> 00:11:52,087 - There you go, Keeley. - Thanks, Alex. 221 00:11:54,339 --> 00:11:55,340 Jamie? 222 00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:57,968 I'm not stalking ya. 223 00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,720 I've been following you for a few blocks now, 224 00:11:59,803 --> 00:12:01,847 and I couldn't text you 'cause I deleted your number. 225 00:12:02,431 --> 00:12:04,641 So, I was in town, and I wanted to talk to you 226 00:12:04,725 --> 00:12:07,561 'cause I left Man City to do this reality TV show thing, 227 00:12:07,644 --> 00:12:10,189 and I got kicked off of both. So now I don't know what I'm doing, 228 00:12:10,272 --> 00:12:12,316 but I just wanted to talk to someone about it 'cause— 229 00:12:12,399 --> 00:12:14,818 And whenever I think of talking, I think of you... 230 00:12:15,569 --> 00:12:18,030 So I've been following you for the last few blocks. 231 00:12:18,530 --> 00:12:19,531 No, I'm lying. 232 00:12:19,615 --> 00:12:21,658 I've been following you for your whole lunch hour. 233 00:12:21,742 --> 00:12:24,578 But I've just been trying to build up the courage to say hi. 234 00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:27,372 So... hi. 235 00:12:29,917 --> 00:12:30,918 Is that okay? 236 00:12:32,586 --> 00:12:34,004 You deleted my number? 237 00:12:35,005 --> 00:12:36,006 Yeah. 238 00:12:37,799 --> 00:12:39,510 You all played a hell of a game. 239 00:12:40,219 --> 00:12:41,470 But you lost. 240 00:12:41,553 --> 00:12:43,805 I want you to remember this feeling. 241 00:12:44,306 --> 00:12:48,393 Burn this moment into your brains. 242 00:12:51,230 --> 00:12:52,231 Good. 243 00:12:52,314 --> 00:12:53,815 Is it time for trophies, Uncle Roy? 244 00:12:53,899 --> 00:12:54,942 Yeah, yeah. 245 00:12:55,025 --> 00:12:57,569 Emily's mom bought everyone consolation trophies. 246 00:12:57,653 --> 00:12:59,279 Must be nice to just burn cash. 247 00:13:01,198 --> 00:13:04,284 "Best dressed"? That's stupid. You're all wearing the same thing. 248 00:13:05,702 --> 00:13:07,246 You. 249 00:13:08,664 --> 00:13:10,082 Right, you know what? 250 00:13:10,582 --> 00:13:13,502 Just get amongst it. Enjoy your trophies for winning nothing. 251 00:13:14,002 --> 00:13:15,337 Coach Kent. 252 00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:18,257 Look, when I was young, you got shouted at for losing. 253 00:13:18,340 --> 00:13:20,592 Same. But then, tough love never bothered me. 254 00:13:20,676 --> 00:13:22,970 As long as I knew the coach gave a shit. 255 00:13:25,806 --> 00:13:29,476 Oy! It has been an honor coaching all of you. 256 00:13:29,977 --> 00:13:32,312 I do hope you'll come back and play next year. 257 00:13:32,855 --> 00:13:35,065 But only if you fucking mean it. 258 00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:43,448 Well, we lost. 259 00:13:45,284 --> 00:13:48,579 Would have been closer, but one of the goals got disallowed 260 00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:53,000 because apparently nine-year-olds aren't allowed to do headers yet. 261 00:13:54,251 --> 00:13:56,503 Fucking brain development. 262 00:14:04,928 --> 00:14:05,929 Keeley? 263 00:14:26,658 --> 00:14:28,994 - What you doing there? - Nothing. 264 00:14:30,871 --> 00:14:32,372 Why'd you throw your phone? 265 00:14:32,456 --> 00:14:35,459 I thought that you were an intruder, and I didn't want you to steal it. 266 00:14:36,668 --> 00:14:39,296 So you threw it over there? 267 00:14:40,005 --> 00:14:41,006 Yeah. 268 00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:43,091 Were you having a wank? 269 00:14:45,886 --> 00:14:46,887 Show me. 270 00:14:46,970 --> 00:14:49,473 No, that's okay. 271 00:14:50,057 --> 00:14:52,851 Babe, come on. Don't be embarrassed. Whatever it is, it's fine. 272 00:14:53,977 --> 00:14:56,146 I like watching couples have sex in the woods. 273 00:14:56,230 --> 00:14:57,606 You do? Why? 274 00:14:57,689 --> 00:14:59,525 'Cause I could never be that free. 275 00:14:59,608 --> 00:15:01,193 Come on, let me see. 276 00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:04,238 I should know what gets you going. 277 00:15:09,868 --> 00:15:11,995 I am announcing... 278 00:15:14,540 --> 00:15:16,124 my retirement... 279 00:15:17,125 --> 00:15:18,460 from— 280 00:15:20,671 --> 00:15:22,005 The fuck? 281 00:15:22,089 --> 00:15:23,423 This is your kink? 282 00:15:23,507 --> 00:15:24,675 Me being pathetic? 283 00:15:24,758 --> 00:15:29,012 You're not being pathetic. You're being passionate and vulnerable. 284 00:15:30,055 --> 00:15:33,433 God, it's fucking hot, and you haven't been like that since you left football. 285 00:15:33,517 --> 00:15:36,103 At my age with a fucked knee, I don't get to be a football player. 286 00:15:36,186 --> 00:15:39,064 - That's how it works. - Then why not just try the pundit gig? 287 00:15:39,147 --> 00:15:40,023 Oh, my God. 288 00:15:40,107 --> 00:15:42,818 I know it's fucking stupid. 289 00:15:42,901 --> 00:15:44,862 But you'd be back around the game again. 290 00:15:44,945 --> 00:15:47,072 You miss it, Roy. I know you do. 291 00:15:47,865 --> 00:15:49,449 You're just like Jamie. 292 00:15:49,533 --> 00:15:51,827 I didn't think this conversation could get any worse. 293 00:15:52,327 --> 00:15:53,704 Jesus Christ. 294 00:15:54,204 --> 00:15:56,290 Yeah, I saw him today. 295 00:15:57,082 --> 00:15:59,251 He wants to come back and play for Richmond. 296 00:16:00,294 --> 00:16:02,754 He's so lost, Roy. Just like you. 297 00:16:02,838 --> 00:16:04,631 But at least he's tryin' to find his way back. 298 00:16:04,715 --> 00:16:06,049 See? Pathetic. 299 00:16:06,133 --> 00:16:07,634 No, it's not pathetic. 300 00:16:07,718 --> 00:16:09,052 It's brave. 301 00:16:09,136 --> 00:16:10,679 Oy, I get it. 302 00:16:11,555 --> 00:16:13,182 Can't get hurt if you don't try. 303 00:16:13,265 --> 00:16:14,266 But if you don't try, 304 00:16:14,349 --> 00:16:17,811 then I'm just gonna have to sit here wanking to videos of you crying. 305 00:16:17,895 --> 00:16:22,274 Fine. I will try it once. 306 00:16:22,357 --> 00:16:24,818 But when it sucks and I hate it, 307 00:16:24,902 --> 00:16:27,946 I'm gonna hire a bunch of children to follow you around and scream, 308 00:16:28,030 --> 00:16:30,365 "Told you so, told you so" for centuries. 309 00:16:30,449 --> 00:16:32,367 I look forward to the attention. 310 00:16:39,458 --> 00:16:41,210 What'd you tell the prince prick of all pricks 311 00:16:41,293 --> 00:16:42,753 about going back to Richmond? 312 00:16:43,337 --> 00:16:45,506 I told him he was talking to the wrong person. 313 00:17:00,229 --> 00:17:01,313 I named him Ted. 314 00:17:02,481 --> 00:17:03,732 After Ted Danson. 315 00:17:05,025 --> 00:17:06,443 All-time great. 316 00:17:06,527 --> 00:17:10,321 You know, from Cheers to Curb to The Good Place. What a career. 317 00:17:12,115 --> 00:17:15,661 I mean, he's basically the male version of Julia Louis-Dreyfus. 318 00:17:15,743 --> 00:17:17,871 Who's like the female version of Dave Grohl. 319 00:17:18,454 --> 00:17:20,790 Yeah. All three of them got that Midas touch, don't they? 320 00:17:21,834 --> 00:17:23,292 Nice to see ya, Jamie. 321 00:17:23,377 --> 00:17:24,502 Take a seat. 322 00:17:26,922 --> 00:17:28,006 How ya been? 323 00:17:28,089 --> 00:17:29,424 Awesome. 324 00:17:29,508 --> 00:17:30,551 - Yeah? - The best. 325 00:17:31,051 --> 00:17:32,094 Pretty good. 326 00:17:32,177 --> 00:17:34,763 Okay, a little depressed. Yeah. 327 00:17:34,847 --> 00:17:36,014 It's all shit, Ted. 328 00:17:37,266 --> 00:17:39,142 That's a real roller coaster there. 329 00:17:39,226 --> 00:17:41,103 Glad I was tall enough to join you on that ride. 330 00:17:41,854 --> 00:17:43,313 Anything I can help you with? 331 00:17:44,731 --> 00:17:46,233 So I was talking to Keeley, 332 00:17:46,316 --> 00:17:50,696 and I was just wondering, like, what the chances were 333 00:17:50,779 --> 00:17:52,739 of me coming back to play for you at Richmond? 334 00:17:53,699 --> 00:17:56,368 I don't know, Jamie, you burned a lot of bridges over there. 335 00:17:57,494 --> 00:17:59,746 Look, Coach, I need Richmond. 336 00:17:59,830 --> 00:18:02,165 And Richmond needs you. 337 00:18:03,792 --> 00:18:04,835 - Thank you, Mae. - Cheers. 338 00:18:05,460 --> 00:18:07,921 Actually, Mae, would you be a darling 339 00:18:08,005 --> 00:18:11,008 and ask those lads at the end of the bar to stop staring at me, please? 340 00:18:11,091 --> 00:18:13,510 Oy, you three, fuck off. 341 00:18:13,594 --> 00:18:14,761 - Oh, yeah, course, Mae. - Sorry! 342 00:18:14,845 --> 00:18:15,929 Fucking off now. 343 00:18:19,266 --> 00:18:21,143 Old people are so wise. 344 00:18:22,436 --> 00:18:23,854 They're like tall Yodas. 345 00:18:24,563 --> 00:18:25,564 Cheers. 346 00:18:26,440 --> 00:18:27,441 Cheers. 347 00:18:30,819 --> 00:18:34,448 Jamie, let me ask you something. Why'd you do that reality show? 348 00:18:35,157 --> 00:18:37,159 You know, you were getting good minutes up at City. 349 00:18:37,242 --> 00:18:41,413 I don't know, just thought it'd be fun. Help boost me brand. 350 00:18:46,710 --> 00:18:48,170 Did it to piss off me dad. 351 00:18:49,463 --> 00:18:51,089 He was just on me after every match. 352 00:18:51,173 --> 00:18:55,719 How I played, how many minutes I played, how I sat on the bench when I didn't play. 353 00:18:55,802 --> 00:18:57,346 Just drove me fucking mad. 354 00:18:59,264 --> 00:19:00,432 He can be a bit... 355 00:19:01,183 --> 00:19:02,184 Yeah. 356 00:19:02,935 --> 00:19:06,438 You know, I've noticed that sometimes having a tough dad 357 00:19:06,522 --> 00:19:10,901 is exactly what drives certain fellas to become great at what they do. 358 00:19:12,069 --> 00:19:14,947 You know, I hear Bono's father was a real piece of work. 359 00:19:15,030 --> 00:19:18,200 But then again, so was Joshua Tree, so you know... 360 00:19:19,535 --> 00:19:20,869 What about you? 361 00:19:20,953 --> 00:19:22,538 Was your old man like that? 362 00:19:22,621 --> 00:19:23,622 No. 363 00:19:24,540 --> 00:19:28,961 No, my father was a lot harder on himself than he ever was on me. 364 00:19:31,839 --> 00:19:33,048 You're lucky. 365 00:19:36,218 --> 00:19:37,678 So what do you say then, Coach? 366 00:19:39,054 --> 00:19:41,056 Jamie, you're an amazing player. 367 00:19:43,976 --> 00:19:45,894 But I don't think it's a good idea. 368 00:19:49,147 --> 00:19:50,148 Yeah. 369 00:19:54,194 --> 00:19:57,865 Right, now get one where it looks like they're sitting in my hand. 370 00:20:06,790 --> 00:20:08,041 That's some bullshit. 371 00:20:08,125 --> 00:20:09,877 - Bloody hell. - Wait, that was last night? 372 00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:11,628 What are you all fussing over? 373 00:20:12,212 --> 00:20:14,381 Looks like Jamie's coming back to Richmond. 374 00:20:16,633 --> 00:20:18,760 It looks like they're sitting on his hand. 375 00:20:19,803 --> 00:20:21,180 Get fucking stuck in! 376 00:20:21,263 --> 00:20:22,264 Just throw it here! 377 00:20:22,347 --> 00:20:24,057 Somebody order training extra spicy today? 378 00:20:24,141 --> 00:20:26,852 Yeah, it's got that Nando's peri-peri sauce on it, huh? 379 00:20:26,935 --> 00:20:28,103 What the fuck was that? 380 00:20:28,979 --> 00:20:30,355 What the fuck you waiting for? 381 00:20:32,482 --> 00:20:35,652 How come every time I look back there it's like she's getting closer and closer? 382 00:20:35,736 --> 00:20:37,779 - Thank you, Will. - That's all right. 383 00:20:38,947 --> 00:20:41,575 Optical illusion induced by your mistrust of her profession? 384 00:20:41,658 --> 00:20:42,993 Metaphor, huh? 385 00:20:43,076 --> 00:20:44,244 Bingo, Ringo. 386 00:20:45,537 --> 00:20:47,456 Is there— Is there pineapple in this? 387 00:20:47,539 --> 00:20:48,832 Jesus Christ. 388 00:20:50,209 --> 00:20:53,003 I'm with Ted. We've been overrun by incompetent outsiders. 389 00:20:53,086 --> 00:20:54,505 I don't think I said that, did I? 390 00:20:54,588 --> 00:20:56,548 - Not to me. It was him. - Yeah. 391 00:20:59,301 --> 00:21:01,720 Come on now. She's definitely getting closer. 392 00:21:03,138 --> 00:21:05,182 - Yes! - Yeah, do it! 393 00:21:05,265 --> 00:21:06,600 Now, look at that. Hey, Nate. 394 00:21:06,683 --> 00:21:08,352 - Hit me two times, will ya? - Yeah. 395 00:21:09,019 --> 00:21:10,729 Hey, Sam! Hold up! Hey! 396 00:21:10,812 --> 00:21:13,815 Look, baby, when you make that pass, you gotta put some grass under it. 397 00:21:13,899 --> 00:21:15,025 Make Dani chase it down 398 00:21:15,108 --> 00:21:17,194 like it's a loose toddler in a busy parking lot. 399 00:21:17,277 --> 00:21:19,446 You think you can do better? Come here and do it then. 400 00:21:19,530 --> 00:21:21,281 Oy! Easy, bruv. 401 00:21:21,365 --> 00:21:23,075 No, no, no. That's okay. Sam's right. 402 00:21:23,158 --> 00:21:25,160 There ain't nothing going on out here on this field 403 00:21:25,244 --> 00:21:26,787 that I can do better than any of y'all. 404 00:21:26,870 --> 00:21:29,790 Unless you break into a game of "finish that Jimmy Buffett lyric." 405 00:21:29,873 --> 00:21:32,835 Then I'll be changing your latitudes and attitudes left, right and center. 406 00:21:32,918 --> 00:21:34,670 You— Hey, Sam. 407 00:21:34,753 --> 00:21:37,172 - I'm just tryin' to help the team here. - Bullshit. 408 00:21:40,425 --> 00:21:41,635 Okay. 409 00:21:43,679 --> 00:21:46,014 I'm gonna see what that's all about here real quick. 410 00:21:47,307 --> 00:21:49,309 He's not normally like this, you know, so... 411 00:21:49,977 --> 00:21:51,895 I guess Sam doesn't like Jimmy Buffett. 412 00:21:51,979 --> 00:21:53,105 Who's Jimmy Buffett? 413 00:21:53,814 --> 00:21:54,815 Really? 414 00:21:55,941 --> 00:21:59,319 Hey. Sam! Slow down. Hey, you got something you wanna talk about? 415 00:21:59,403 --> 00:22:00,487 No. 416 00:22:00,571 --> 00:22:02,614 Really? It seems like you got something on your mind. 417 00:22:02,698 --> 00:22:04,575 Something like, "I'm angry about a mysterious thing 418 00:22:04,658 --> 00:22:05,909 so I'm gonna do some cussing now." 419 00:22:05,993 --> 00:22:07,578 I mean, I am angry. 420 00:22:07,661 --> 00:22:09,580 And I did cuss, and every time I do, I regret it. 421 00:22:09,663 --> 00:22:10,747 'Cause people say cuss words 422 00:22:10,831 --> 00:22:13,333 when they don't know the right ones to use to express themselves. 423 00:22:13,417 --> 00:22:14,543 Except Bernie Mac. 424 00:22:14,626 --> 00:22:17,588 He uses them like van Gogh uses yellow. You know, effectively. 425 00:22:17,671 --> 00:22:20,132 - Come on, talk to me. - I can't believe you're bringing Jamie 426 00:22:20,215 --> 00:22:21,133 - back to the team. - What? 427 00:22:21,216 --> 00:22:22,885 I saw the picture of you and him on Twitter. 428 00:22:22,968 --> 00:22:25,429 Oh, Sam, there's a bunch of crazy stuff on Twitter. 429 00:22:25,512 --> 00:22:27,139 Heck, someone made an account for my mustache. 430 00:22:27,222 --> 00:22:29,600 How many locker room punch-ups have we had since Jamie's been gone? 431 00:22:29,683 --> 00:22:30,767 - None. - None. 432 00:22:31,268 --> 00:22:34,021 Have we won yet? No, but we will. 433 00:22:34,688 --> 00:22:36,231 I believe that. Don't you? 434 00:22:37,441 --> 00:22:40,777 Just because Jamie can score goals doesn't mean he deserves to be here. 435 00:22:47,618 --> 00:22:50,704 No teammate has ever made me feel as bad about myself as Jamie did. 436 00:22:50,787 --> 00:22:53,540 - Sam, I understand your anger towards him. - It's not him. 437 00:22:54,124 --> 00:22:55,626 I'm mad at you. 438 00:22:56,168 --> 00:22:57,711 You didn't even talk to us about it. 439 00:22:57,794 --> 00:23:00,339 Honestly, Sam, I didn't think there was anything to talk about. 440 00:23:00,422 --> 00:23:01,840 I told Jamie it wasn't gonna happen. 441 00:23:04,843 --> 00:23:06,845 - Now I feel awkward. - I bet. 442 00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:10,098 Did everybody see me when I stomped off— 443 00:23:10,182 --> 00:23:13,310 No, no one saw that. Yeah, man! Everyone saw that. Come on. 444 00:23:13,393 --> 00:23:14,520 Of course they did. 445 00:23:17,022 --> 00:23:18,148 Coach, I'm so sorry. 446 00:23:18,232 --> 00:23:19,983 It's okay, Sam, all right? 447 00:23:20,067 --> 00:23:22,736 You are a leader on this team. I want you to speak your mind. 448 00:23:23,737 --> 00:23:24,947 Thank you. 449 00:23:27,282 --> 00:23:30,410 You know, my father says every time he sees you on TV, 450 00:23:30,494 --> 00:23:31,870 he's very happy that I am here. 451 00:23:33,288 --> 00:23:36,124 That I'm in safe hands with you. 452 00:23:37,459 --> 00:23:38,669 Well, that means a lot. 453 00:23:39,545 --> 00:23:40,546 I appreciate that. 454 00:23:42,548 --> 00:23:44,842 You know I still gotta make you run a bunch of laps, right? 455 00:23:44,925 --> 00:23:46,593 - I was hoping you would. - Okay. Get going. 456 00:23:46,677 --> 00:23:47,886 - Thank you. - Yes. 457 00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:53,851 - Very well handled, Ted. - Gee... 458 00:23:56,562 --> 00:23:57,729 Thank you, Higgins. 459 00:24:04,361 --> 00:24:05,362 What are you doing? 460 00:24:05,445 --> 00:24:08,490 Sorry. What do you usually do with your lashes? 461 00:24:08,574 --> 00:24:10,534 I leave them the fuck alone. 462 00:24:11,618 --> 00:24:12,703 'Scuse me. 463 00:24:14,580 --> 00:24:15,581 - Hey. - Hi. 464 00:24:15,664 --> 00:24:16,957 I wanted to see how it was going. 465 00:24:17,624 --> 00:24:19,793 Jamie Carragher sent me flowers. 466 00:24:19,877 --> 00:24:22,421 We fucking despised each other when we played, 467 00:24:22,504 --> 00:24:23,922 now he's sending me flowers. 468 00:24:24,006 --> 00:24:26,300 How the fuck does he know I love white orchids? 469 00:24:26,383 --> 00:24:28,510 Babe, it's only natural to be a bit nervous. 470 00:24:28,594 --> 00:24:31,013 I'm not nervous. There's nothing scary about this. 471 00:24:31,096 --> 00:24:32,764 There's no defense in TV. 472 00:24:33,599 --> 00:24:34,725 Well, what is it then? 473 00:24:34,808 --> 00:24:37,936 It's just— What if— 474 00:24:41,190 --> 00:24:42,774 What if everyone thinks I'm shit? 475 00:24:43,483 --> 00:24:45,777 Since when do you care what people think? 476 00:24:45,861 --> 00:24:47,654 You're Roy fucking Kent. 477 00:24:49,448 --> 00:24:50,782 Ready for Mr. Kent. 478 00:24:51,283 --> 00:24:53,535 I gotta go. Thank you. 479 00:24:54,119 --> 00:24:56,205 Kill 'em. Roy-o! 480 00:25:19,102 --> 00:25:21,146 - Glad to have you on the show, Roy. - Whatever. 481 00:25:22,731 --> 00:25:24,358 Same old Roy Kent. 482 00:25:25,234 --> 00:25:28,111 Hey, Roy, try not to get too emotional, yeah? 483 00:25:28,195 --> 00:25:31,114 And we're on in five seconds. 484 00:25:31,198 --> 00:25:33,992 Four, three, two. 485 00:25:36,870 --> 00:25:40,249 What a match! Manchester United beat Chelsea 1-nil 486 00:25:40,332 --> 00:25:42,876 in a result that drops Chelsea out of the European places 487 00:25:42,960 --> 00:25:45,587 and lands United in the top three, for now. 488 00:25:45,671 --> 00:25:46,713 Chris, was this a case 489 00:25:46,797 --> 00:25:49,132 where United won the match or that Chelsea lost it? 490 00:25:49,216 --> 00:25:53,053 United just had that extra sharpness in the final third, 491 00:25:53,136 --> 00:25:55,973 but I thought both teams played really well. 492 00:25:56,056 --> 00:25:58,100 - George? - A real even battle. 493 00:25:58,183 --> 00:26:00,102 You know, it's football at its finest. 494 00:26:00,185 --> 00:26:02,604 Roy Kent, ex-Chelsea legend joins us. 495 00:26:02,688 --> 00:26:04,106 Welcome, Roy. 496 00:26:04,731 --> 00:26:06,650 Right, what did you think? 497 00:26:06,733 --> 00:26:08,110 Did your former club play well? 498 00:26:08,193 --> 00:26:10,529 No. I thought they played like shit. 499 00:26:13,115 --> 00:26:14,825 Our apologies to the viewing audience. 500 00:26:14,908 --> 00:26:17,619 Roy Kent with some salty language. 501 00:26:17,703 --> 00:26:19,788 Would you care to elaborate, Roy? 502 00:26:19,872 --> 00:26:21,999 All right. Chelsea was shit today. 503 00:26:22,791 --> 00:26:23,834 They were shocking. 504 00:26:23,917 --> 00:26:26,336 Watching them, you'd never know they were playing at home. 505 00:26:26,420 --> 00:26:29,590 They were too timid. They were too respectful of United. 506 00:26:29,673 --> 00:26:32,551 They were lucky they didn't lose by three or four or ten. 507 00:26:32,634 --> 00:26:36,096 That's harsh, Roy. United's been on a good run recently. 508 00:26:36,180 --> 00:26:37,556 Who gives a shit, Chris? 509 00:26:38,849 --> 00:26:41,727 That's no excuse to play like you're afraid of 'em. 510 00:26:41,810 --> 00:26:44,688 You could see it in their faces: abject terror. 511 00:26:44,771 --> 00:26:47,983 Like children waiting in line for the handsy Father Christmas. 512 00:26:48,066 --> 00:26:51,904 Have some fucking pride in your shirt or don't fucking wear it. 513 00:26:52,988 --> 00:26:54,907 Roy Kent, you fucking legend! 514 00:26:54,990 --> 00:26:57,784 - I mean, that is how you do it! - I enjoy his candor. 515 00:26:57,868 --> 00:27:02,206 Again, we apologize for almost every word Roy just said. 516 00:27:11,757 --> 00:27:14,092 Higgins, as a founding member of the Diamond Dogs, 517 00:27:14,176 --> 00:27:17,137 it breaks our little bowwow hearts to see you wandering around this building. 518 00:27:17,221 --> 00:27:18,472 A man without a desk. 519 00:27:18,555 --> 00:27:21,308 So we'd like to ask you to move in with us down here with my man, Nate. 520 00:27:21,391 --> 00:27:22,851 What do you say? 521 00:27:24,019 --> 00:27:27,189 That would be perfect. I mean, only if it's okay with Nathan. 522 00:27:28,941 --> 00:27:30,192 Yeah, of course. 523 00:27:30,275 --> 00:27:31,693 Roomies! 524 00:27:32,736 --> 00:27:34,154 Oops, sorry. 525 00:27:34,238 --> 00:27:35,364 Now, before y'all bounce, 526 00:27:35,447 --> 00:27:37,866 I do have one piece of football business we need to discuss. 527 00:27:37,950 --> 00:27:39,952 And that is Jamie Tartt's future with this team. 528 00:27:40,035 --> 00:27:42,037 - I thought that was settled. - Well, I did too. 529 00:27:42,120 --> 00:27:44,122 Then I was talking to Sam, and he unsettled it. 530 00:27:44,790 --> 00:27:46,625 - Sam wants Jamie back? - No, no. 531 00:27:46,708 --> 00:27:50,379 Sam just reminded me that he himself has got a great dad. 532 00:27:50,462 --> 00:27:51,797 Not everyone has that. 533 00:27:52,422 --> 00:27:54,091 And isn't the idea of "never give up" 534 00:27:54,174 --> 00:27:56,093 one of them things we always talk about in sports? 535 00:27:56,176 --> 00:27:57,678 And shouldn't that apply to people too? 536 00:27:57,761 --> 00:28:00,556 Two aces is very tempting. Could be exactly what we need. 537 00:28:01,348 --> 00:28:04,226 But it could also ruin morale to have someone in here 538 00:28:04,309 --> 00:28:06,144 just belittling everyone all the ti— 539 00:28:06,228 --> 00:28:09,523 Will! Will! Not beneath the lockers. On the bench, man. Come on. 540 00:28:10,023 --> 00:28:11,024 Sorry. 541 00:28:12,901 --> 00:28:13,944 What a doughnut. 542 00:28:15,737 --> 00:28:16,738 What was I saying? 543 00:28:17,531 --> 00:28:20,450 - What about you, Coach? - Pro: He's a great player. 544 00:28:20,534 --> 00:28:23,453 He's a poop in the punch bowl. 545 00:28:24,037 --> 00:28:27,749 All right, Diamond Dogs, as canines, we are supposed to lack opposable digits. 546 00:28:27,833 --> 00:28:30,002 But right now I'm gonna ask you: thumbs up or thumbs down? 547 00:28:37,426 --> 00:28:40,220 Okay. Okay. 548 00:28:47,895 --> 00:28:48,896 Hi. 549 00:28:50,606 --> 00:28:51,815 How'd it go? 550 00:28:54,359 --> 00:28:56,028 Come on, babe. Say something. 551 00:28:56,111 --> 00:28:57,988 What, you just gonna pretend like you hated it? 552 00:28:59,072 --> 00:29:00,282 You were amazing. 553 00:29:01,575 --> 00:29:04,536 - Shit, you really did hate it. - May I have your phone? 554 00:29:06,455 --> 00:29:07,456 Roy, I'm really sorry. 555 00:29:07,539 --> 00:29:08,707 It's just that— 556 00:29:08,790 --> 00:29:11,835 I mean, not that it matters— But everyone over there, they loved you. 557 00:29:11,919 --> 00:29:13,879 And Twitter was going cuckoo for Coco Pops. 558 00:29:15,255 --> 00:29:17,758 But you don't ever have to do it again if you don't want to, so... 559 00:29:18,342 --> 00:29:19,343 Here. 560 00:29:21,136 --> 00:29:22,930 Felt good to be back around the game. 561 00:29:23,013 --> 00:29:24,640 Oh, good. 562 00:29:26,266 --> 00:29:27,267 What are you doing? 563 00:29:27,809 --> 00:29:30,896 You helped me to help myself. Again. 564 00:29:31,897 --> 00:29:33,440 So I wanted to thank you properly. 565 00:29:34,775 --> 00:29:35,776 Hit play. 566 00:29:37,736 --> 00:29:39,238 I am announcing... 567 00:29:42,616 --> 00:29:43,951 my retirement... 568 00:29:45,202 --> 00:29:46,203 from— 569 00:30:03,971 --> 00:30:05,389 Hey, there she is. 570 00:30:06,014 --> 00:30:07,558 Good night, Coach Lasso. 571 00:30:07,641 --> 00:30:10,394 And thank you for letting me observe training today. 572 00:30:11,228 --> 00:30:14,398 Some coaches get quite conspiratorial at the notion. 573 00:30:14,982 --> 00:30:17,401 Well, I didn't know I had a choice. I'm just goofing. 574 00:30:17,484 --> 00:30:20,153 Besides, most of my conspiracies revolve around the Freemasons 575 00:30:20,237 --> 00:30:22,155 on account of a couple different Disney cartoons 576 00:30:22,239 --> 00:30:23,490 I watched a bunch as a kid. 577 00:30:23,574 --> 00:30:26,368 I'll email you and your staff my takeaways when I get home. 578 00:30:26,451 --> 00:30:28,287 Well, hey. Come on. Let 'er rip right now. 579 00:30:28,370 --> 00:30:29,580 Reading that email will be like 580 00:30:29,663 --> 00:30:31,331 listening to a cover tune of your thoughts. 581 00:30:31,415 --> 00:30:34,168 Rather hear this tune for the first time from the original artist. 582 00:30:34,251 --> 00:30:36,378 - Well, if you insist. - I do. 583 00:30:36,461 --> 00:30:38,130 There's a wonderful atmosphere here. 584 00:30:39,173 --> 00:30:43,802 All the employees are thoughtful and kind, and they actually listen to one another. 585 00:30:43,886 --> 00:30:45,554 Yeah, I've noticed the same thing. 586 00:30:46,555 --> 00:30:47,973 Well, hey, let me ask you this now. 587 00:30:48,056 --> 00:30:49,099 You think we got ourselves 588 00:30:49,183 --> 00:30:51,685 a "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" situation here or what? 589 00:30:51,768 --> 00:30:53,145 That depends. 590 00:30:53,228 --> 00:30:57,524 Does everyone agree that being winless with eight straight draws "ain't broke"? 591 00:30:59,151 --> 00:31:00,152 Yeah. 592 00:31:01,195 --> 00:31:04,323 Heavy is the head that wears the visor, Coach Lasso. 593 00:31:05,490 --> 00:31:07,367 You must have a lot on your mind. 594 00:31:08,577 --> 00:31:11,413 I hope we get a chance to sit down and talk about it all someday. 595 00:31:11,496 --> 00:31:12,956 Yeah. No, I look forward to that. 596 00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:16,460 All right. Good night, Doc... tor! Doctor. 597 00:31:16,543 --> 00:31:17,544 Sorry. 598 00:31:18,128 --> 00:31:19,922 You can call me Doc. It's okay. 599 00:31:20,005 --> 00:31:22,549 Oh, thank God. I mean, that's been killing me. 600 00:31:22,633 --> 00:31:24,718 You saw it, you know. It's just such a good nickname. 601 00:31:24,801 --> 00:31:26,261 Prince of Tides. 602 00:31:26,345 --> 00:31:27,721 Is that your nickname for me now? 603 00:31:27,804 --> 00:31:30,766 No, Coach Lasso. My favorite book. 604 00:31:46,240 --> 00:31:48,408 The people at Dubai Air have asked specifically for Sam. 605 00:31:48,492 --> 00:31:50,953 There's a photo shoot set up for Friday. 606 00:31:51,036 --> 00:31:54,248 Good for him. That young man deserves some recognition. 607 00:31:54,331 --> 00:31:55,332 Yeah. 608 00:31:57,084 --> 00:32:00,462 Hello. Sorry to interrupt. I'm Sharon Fieldstone. 609 00:32:00,546 --> 00:32:03,590 Yes. Oh, it is lovely to meet you, Dr. Fieldstone. 610 00:32:03,674 --> 00:32:06,844 - Please, call me Sharon. Hi. - Hi! Lovely to meet you. 611 00:32:06,927 --> 00:32:08,387 I just wanted to stop by 612 00:32:08,470 --> 00:32:10,848 and thank you for the lovely gift basket of bottled water. 613 00:32:10,931 --> 00:32:13,433 Yes, well, Ted said you didn't eat sugar. 614 00:32:13,517 --> 00:32:15,310 So many other things don't have sugar in them. 615 00:32:16,311 --> 00:32:19,022 I really am glad that you're joining us. 616 00:32:19,106 --> 00:32:22,568 I hope that you'll be just the boost we need to get things going around here. 617 00:32:22,651 --> 00:32:23,986 Wouldn't you say, Higgins? 618 00:32:26,196 --> 00:32:27,197 Leslie? 619 00:32:27,823 --> 00:32:29,366 Sorry, I was just...