1 00:00:31,240 --> 00:00:32,491 Good afternoon. 2 00:00:39,081 --> 00:00:42,084 Sorry, I was waiting for you to ask if— if I needed anything. 3 00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:45,295 So, this is my mom and dad's favorite restaurant 4 00:00:45,379 --> 00:00:48,298 and Friday's their 35th wedding anniversary, Jade. 5 00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:50,259 How do you know my name? 6 00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:54,388 Oh, I don't. That's what the 35th wedding anniversary is: 7 00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:55,472 Jade. 8 00:00:55,556 --> 00:00:58,976 Oh, weird. What time, then? 9 00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:02,437 Oh, 7:30, three people and really wanna make sure we get the window table. 10 00:01:06,859 --> 00:01:08,402 You've got all the divisions... 11 00:01:08,485 --> 00:01:09,862 I have to talk to Derrick. 12 00:01:09,945 --> 00:01:11,572 former England international... 13 00:01:12,281 --> 00:01:13,532 Chris Kamara. 14 00:01:13,615 --> 00:01:15,659 It was an unbelievable performance. 15 00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:17,870 Do you mind just turning that up? Thank you. 16 00:01:17,953 --> 00:01:20,080 I couldn't believe it! 17 00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:21,415 Looking into the championship now, 18 00:01:21,498 --> 00:01:23,792 Roy, your old mob in Richmond, struggling. 19 00:01:23,876 --> 00:01:26,378 There are a lot of theories as to why that might be. 20 00:01:26,461 --> 00:01:29,423 One that's gaining traction is a lack of leadership 21 00:01:29,506 --> 00:01:31,800 from your successor as captain, Isaac McAdoo. 22 00:01:31,884 --> 00:01:35,345 Isaac's a good lad. He'll find his way. 23 00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:38,974 You know, under Ted Lasso, Richmond, well, 24 00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:42,311 they're like a woman behind the wheel: completely lost! 25 00:01:42,394 --> 00:01:45,689 George! Didn't you lose your license drink driving? 26 00:01:46,273 --> 00:01:48,859 That was an allergic reaction to my medication. 27 00:01:48,942 --> 00:01:50,861 The same medication that made you piss your pants? 28 00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:57,451 Nothing coming up... 29 00:01:57,534 --> 00:01:58,952 So, did— Did the— 30 00:02:01,872 --> 00:02:03,207 Hey. Hi. 31 00:02:03,707 --> 00:02:05,167 Good news. 32 00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:07,753 We can set aside the table in the corner for you. 33 00:02:08,419 --> 00:02:09,963 Wonderful. I just— 34 00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:13,091 I would really like the window table, you know, just to impress my dad. 35 00:02:13,175 --> 00:02:16,637 I'm sorry. I can't guarantee a reservation for the window table. 36 00:02:18,555 --> 00:02:20,599 I know Roy Kent, if that's— 37 00:02:21,767 --> 00:02:23,018 Is he your dad? 38 00:02:23,101 --> 00:02:24,186 No. 39 00:02:24,269 --> 00:02:27,439 Well, please let us know if Mr. Kent ever wants the window table. 40 00:02:32,110 --> 00:02:33,237 Okay. Thank you. 41 00:03:29,293 --> 00:03:31,879 Jan Maas, that's shit defending. 42 00:03:31,962 --> 00:03:33,589 Yes, that goal was entirely my fault. 43 00:03:33,672 --> 00:03:36,633 I don't wanna hear it. We need to get our shit together! 44 00:03:38,510 --> 00:03:40,888 Hey, hit pause for me, will you? Hey, fellas. 45 00:03:41,471 --> 00:03:43,140 No, I gave you an indoor whistle. 46 00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:45,100 Listen, I don't care what our record is, 47 00:03:45,184 --> 00:03:48,020 but I hear the chatter, people saying there's something wrong with us. 48 00:03:48,103 --> 00:03:49,688 Not the way I see it, okay? 49 00:03:49,771 --> 00:03:50,814 And here's why: 50 00:03:50,898 --> 00:03:52,566 I believe in communism. 51 00:03:54,985 --> 00:03:56,653 Rom-communism, that is. 52 00:03:58,071 --> 00:03:59,573 What is rom-communism? 53 00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:01,867 Well, Bumbercatch, it is a worldview that reminds us 54 00:04:01,950 --> 00:04:05,871 that romantic comedies with folks like Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan 55 00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:08,540 or Julia Roberts and Hugh Grant or— Who am I missing, Coach? 56 00:04:09,708 --> 00:04:11,043 Drew Barrymore? 57 00:04:11,126 --> 00:04:13,670 - Matthew McConaughey, obviously. - All right, all right. Yeah. 58 00:04:13,754 --> 00:04:16,048 - The three Kates. - Yeah, Beckinsale, Hudson, Winslet. 59 00:04:16,964 --> 00:04:19,176 - You forgot Blanchett. - Different spelling. 60 00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:21,678 I enjoy Renée Zellweger and all the Bridget Jones movies. 61 00:04:22,304 --> 00:04:23,639 I mean, her accent is pitch perfect 62 00:04:23,722 --> 00:04:25,891 and her gift of physical comedy is grossly underrated. 63 00:04:25,974 --> 00:04:27,935 - Word! - Hell yeah! 64 00:04:28,018 --> 00:04:29,269 - Absolutely! - I saw Judy... 65 00:04:29,353 --> 00:04:31,104 All right, you've gotta give it up for Zellweger. 66 00:04:32,356 --> 00:04:34,816 Look, point is, fellas, if all those attractive people 67 00:04:34,900 --> 00:04:37,277 with their amazing apartments and interesting jobs, 68 00:04:37,361 --> 00:04:38,862 usually in some creative field, 69 00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:42,282 can go through some lighthearted struggles and still end up happy, 70 00:04:42,366 --> 00:04:43,367 then so can we. 71 00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:45,536 Jennifer Lopez! 72 00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:48,747 That's a great call, Dani, and not at all a beat too late. 73 00:04:49,873 --> 00:04:51,792 Gentlemen, believing in rom-communism 74 00:04:51,875 --> 00:04:54,545 is all about believing that everything's gonna work out in the end. 75 00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:56,713 Now these next few months might be tricky, 76 00:04:57,422 --> 00:04:59,424 but that's just 'cause we're going through our dark forest. 77 00:04:59,508 --> 00:05:02,761 Fairy tales do not start, nor do they end in the dark forest. 78 00:05:02,845 --> 00:05:06,056 That son of a gun always shows up smack-dab in the middle of a story. 79 00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:07,391 But it will all work out. 80 00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:09,017 Now, it may not work out 81 00:05:09,101 --> 00:05:12,312 how you think it will or how you hope it does, 82 00:05:12,396 --> 00:05:16,817 but believe me, it will all work out. 83 00:05:17,442 --> 00:05:18,777 Exactly as it's supposed to. 84 00:05:20,904 --> 00:05:25,325 Our job is to have zero expectations and just let go. 85 00:05:28,620 --> 00:05:29,621 Now, you heard him! 86 00:05:30,914 --> 00:05:32,833 We need to stop playing like shit! 87 00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:36,253 Yeah, not exactly what I said, but I appreciate you, Isaac. 88 00:05:36,336 --> 00:05:38,922 Okay, let's watch the second half. Come on, Coach. 89 00:05:44,094 --> 00:05:46,054 Hey, anyone know what's going on with Isaac? 90 00:05:46,138 --> 00:05:47,598 I got no idea. No. 91 00:05:47,681 --> 00:05:49,600 Maybe it's piles. 92 00:05:49,683 --> 00:05:53,979 I've accepted "aubergine" and "snogging", but "piles" I will not abide. 93 00:05:54,563 --> 00:05:57,274 Wait a second, we play Sheffield Wednesday? 94 00:05:57,357 --> 00:05:59,985 - Saturday. - Oh, we're playing Sheffield Saturday? 95 00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:01,653 Sheffield Wednesday, Saturday. 96 00:06:01,737 --> 00:06:03,488 We gotta play 'em twice in the same week? 97 00:06:05,490 --> 00:06:07,868 The club is called Sheffield Wednesday. We play them on Saturday. 98 00:06:07,951 --> 00:06:10,829 They're called Sheffield Wednesday because they used to only play on Wednesdays. 99 00:06:10,913 --> 00:06:13,081 But nowadays they play on whatever day they feel like, 100 00:06:13,165 --> 00:06:15,042 including, but not limited to, Saturdays, 101 00:06:15,125 --> 00:06:17,252 which, again, is the day we will be playing them. 102 00:06:17,336 --> 00:06:18,921 This Saturday? I can't. I got plans. 103 00:06:19,671 --> 00:06:20,964 - I'm leaving. - Oh, come on. 104 00:06:21,507 --> 00:06:23,091 - Hey, Doc. - Good afternoon. 105 00:06:23,759 --> 00:06:25,844 Coach Lasso, is Isaac okay? 106 00:06:25,928 --> 00:06:27,304 No, ma'am, he is not. 107 00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:30,182 He's a wigwam in a tepee right now. 108 00:06:30,682 --> 00:06:31,850 What does that mean? 109 00:06:31,934 --> 00:06:33,769 - He's too tense. - Boom! 110 00:06:34,811 --> 00:06:36,605 He's wound tighter than my nan's hairnet. 111 00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:39,316 That only makes sense if you know my nan, 112 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:42,444 but when she wears a hairnet, it looks like puppies are trying to escape from it. 113 00:06:44,613 --> 00:06:45,697 I am not crazy. 114 00:06:46,865 --> 00:06:49,701 - Do you want me to talk to Isaac? - No. That's okay. We got it. 115 00:06:49,785 --> 00:06:51,662 I know exactly what Isaac needs. Thank you, though. 116 00:06:52,538 --> 00:06:53,539 Okay. 117 00:06:56,542 --> 00:06:58,585 - What does Isaac need? - Oh, I have no idea. 118 00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:00,504 No, usually in this situation 119 00:07:00,587 --> 00:07:03,257 I'd have a player talk to the team captain before I intervened. 120 00:07:03,340 --> 00:07:04,967 - But Isaac's our captain. - Exactly. 121 00:07:05,050 --> 00:07:07,302 And I can't very well ask Isaac to pull himself aside. 122 00:07:07,386 --> 00:07:09,972 'Cause that would be dangerously close to messing with the, what's it? 123 00:07:10,055 --> 00:07:11,723 - The dark arts? - No, no. 124 00:07:11,807 --> 00:07:13,016 Space-time continuum? 125 00:07:13,100 --> 00:07:14,393 That's it, yeah. 126 00:07:14,935 --> 00:07:17,187 - Oh. - Fact is, Isaac is a big dog, you know? 127 00:07:17,271 --> 00:07:19,398 So he's only going to respond to a big dog himself. 128 00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:23,485 I'll do it. 129 00:07:27,155 --> 00:07:28,240 Oh, you're being serious? 130 00:07:29,324 --> 00:07:30,409 You didn't laugh. 131 00:07:30,492 --> 00:07:31,994 - You knew he was being serious? - Yeah, man. 132 00:07:32,077 --> 00:07:33,453 Shoot. Busted. 133 00:07:34,746 --> 00:07:38,041 I'm sorry about that, Nate. But I do appreciate the offer, you know? 134 00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:39,793 I think we gotta get him a real big dog. 135 00:07:39,877 --> 00:07:41,879 Yeah, no, goo— Me too. 136 00:07:41,962 --> 00:07:43,797 - Yeah. Yeah. Thanks. - Yeah. 137 00:07:43,881 --> 00:07:46,258 Okay. Let's see here. 138 00:07:47,926 --> 00:07:49,428 I'm okay with "fanny". 139 00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:54,183 One, two, three... 140 00:07:58,520 --> 00:07:59,730 Did you just giggle? 141 00:08:00,564 --> 00:08:01,815 I don't know. Did I? 142 00:08:02,983 --> 00:08:03,984 Maybe. 143 00:08:04,526 --> 00:08:06,361 And now you're doubling down as Shy Rebecca, 144 00:08:06,445 --> 00:08:07,821 who is a fictional character. 145 00:08:07,905 --> 00:08:09,907 She does not actually exist, so something's up. 146 00:08:12,201 --> 00:08:13,202 Hey, boys! 147 00:08:13,285 --> 00:08:15,662 Come get your free Nespresso coffee machines 148 00:08:15,746 --> 00:08:17,456 because I'm amazing at my job! 149 00:08:17,539 --> 00:08:20,834 People who are amazing at their job don't have to point it out. 150 00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:25,088 Actually, that's not how it works anymore. It's all about promoting your own brand. 151 00:08:26,507 --> 00:08:29,176 Please don't forget to post when you make yourselves an Americano. 152 00:08:29,259 --> 00:08:30,844 I'll put something on my Insta straightaway. 153 00:08:30,928 --> 00:08:31,970 Thanks, Colin. Oh, wait! 154 00:08:32,638 --> 00:08:35,390 Do you think you can make this one post not about Welsh independence? 155 00:08:36,225 --> 00:08:37,226 Yeah. 156 00:08:38,434 --> 00:08:39,477 Thank you. 157 00:08:40,102 --> 00:08:43,482 So can I, like, give this back to you and you give me cash? 158 00:08:43,565 --> 00:08:45,150 - Is that a thing, or... - No. 159 00:08:45,234 --> 00:08:47,027 Oh, yeah. Ok— Okay. 160 00:08:49,029 --> 00:08:50,489 All right, what the fuck? 161 00:08:50,572 --> 00:08:53,825 Sorry. It's just this mystery man that I've been talking to on Bantr 162 00:08:53,909 --> 00:08:56,203 has just quoted Rilke. 163 00:08:56,828 --> 00:08:59,873 "Our deepest fears are like dragons guarding our deepest treasures". 164 00:08:59,957 --> 00:09:02,000 Oh, that is so hot. 165 00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:06,672 Maybe you're writing letters to a hung poet. 166 00:09:07,297 --> 00:09:08,924 Is that a joke from Sex and The City? 167 00:09:09,007 --> 00:09:10,551 No, but thank you. 168 00:09:10,634 --> 00:09:12,094 I love that you're so excited. 169 00:09:12,177 --> 00:09:16,014 That's so Bantr, a place where minds can come to undress. 170 00:09:16,098 --> 00:09:17,683 That's really good. I'm gonna use that. 171 00:09:17,766 --> 00:09:18,809 I mean, don't get me wrong, 172 00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:22,604 I'm still chatting to these other guys on the other dating app, Tumescent. 173 00:09:22,688 --> 00:09:24,273 Yeah, and what was that discourse like? 174 00:09:25,274 --> 00:09:27,401 Less revealing, but more revealing. 175 00:09:28,235 --> 00:09:29,486 Jesus, where's the rest of it? 176 00:09:31,029 --> 00:09:32,030 Christ. 177 00:09:32,114 --> 00:09:34,575 I mean, shouldn't romance have a little mystery to it? 178 00:09:35,742 --> 00:09:37,077 Sure, it depends on what you want. 179 00:09:37,995 --> 00:09:41,039 See? It all comes back to branding, even with love. 180 00:09:42,708 --> 00:09:43,709 Yeah. 181 00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:48,839 Oh, Dani! Enjoy your free coffee. 182 00:09:48,922 --> 00:09:51,967 Oh, I don't drink coffee. My mother says I was born caffeinated. 183 00:09:52,050 --> 00:09:53,594 Is it okay if I give it to my neighbor? 184 00:09:53,677 --> 00:09:55,596 She also doesn't drink coffee but her son does. 185 00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:57,681 And she's trying to encourage more visits from him. 186 00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:58,932 Sure! 187 00:09:59,016 --> 00:10:00,726 - ¡Excelente! - Oh, yeah! 188 00:10:00,809 --> 00:10:02,853 - Oh, wow. Look at this. - Sorry, Nate. 189 00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:04,605 They're actually just for the players. 190 00:10:04,688 --> 00:10:06,523 Oh, good. 191 00:10:06,607 --> 00:10:09,067 I hate free coffee anyway, always tastes so... 192 00:10:11,904 --> 00:10:13,113 Yeah. Fine. 193 00:10:34,718 --> 00:10:35,719 Hello, Rebecca. 194 00:10:36,637 --> 00:10:37,638 Hello, Higgins. 195 00:10:38,305 --> 00:10:39,389 What can I help you with? 196 00:10:39,473 --> 00:10:40,933 Payroll. 197 00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:45,103 We have an inquiry from AFC Wrexham. 198 00:10:45,187 --> 00:10:47,231 Just got a call from their new owners, 199 00:10:47,314 --> 00:10:49,691 showbiz magnates Rob McElhenney and Ryan Reynolds. 200 00:10:50,442 --> 00:10:53,487 I can't tell if them buying the club is a joke or not, 201 00:10:53,570 --> 00:10:55,072 so I haven't replied to them yet. 202 00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:58,408 Right. Did you just see what was on my screen? 203 00:10:59,034 --> 00:11:00,577 Oh, no, no, no, no. 204 00:11:00,661 --> 00:11:02,371 I have five boys. 205 00:11:02,454 --> 00:11:05,165 I never look over anyone's shoulders to see what's on their screens. 206 00:11:07,084 --> 00:11:08,168 I used to. 207 00:11:09,253 --> 00:11:10,254 Oh, apologies! 208 00:11:10,337 --> 00:11:12,381 That's my wife. 209 00:11:12,464 --> 00:11:14,633 I'll ring her back later. Keeps it fresh. 210 00:11:15,801 --> 00:11:18,470 But I'll just text her real quick to let her know that. 211 00:11:19,263 --> 00:11:22,975 So your ringtone for your wife is "She's a Rainbow" by the Rolling Stones? 212 00:11:23,058 --> 00:11:25,352 - Yeah. - That's awfully affectionate. 213 00:11:25,435 --> 00:11:27,396 Yeah, well, it's our song. 214 00:11:27,938 --> 00:11:29,648 It was playing the moment we met. 215 00:11:29,731 --> 00:11:33,485 And it's not an exaggeration. She really is my rainbow. 216 00:11:34,945 --> 00:11:37,573 It is so odd to imagine you young. 217 00:11:37,656 --> 00:11:39,283 Yeah, I get that a lot. 218 00:11:39,366 --> 00:11:41,618 I was the only kid in primary school with sciatica. 219 00:11:42,786 --> 00:11:45,038 I had a gelatinous L4 and five. 220 00:11:46,582 --> 00:11:48,333 Leslie, do you mind me asking, 221 00:11:48,417 --> 00:11:50,252 when you first met your wife, 222 00:11:50,335 --> 00:11:53,088 how did you put yourself across? 223 00:11:53,172 --> 00:11:55,632 You know, what was your brand? 224 00:11:55,716 --> 00:11:56,925 "Brand"? 225 00:11:57,551 --> 00:12:00,262 Well, you know, the night I met my wife, 226 00:12:00,345 --> 00:12:04,266 I was attempting to be a brooding punk with hair spiked out to here. 227 00:12:04,349 --> 00:12:08,770 And then "She's a Rainbow" came on and I started playing upright air bass 228 00:12:08,854 --> 00:12:12,191 but I had a pint in my hand and ended up pouring beer all over my head. 229 00:12:13,317 --> 00:12:15,068 Everyone in the bar laughed, 230 00:12:15,152 --> 00:12:19,364 except one person who handed me a damp, disgusting bar towel. 231 00:12:20,949 --> 00:12:23,160 And I've been married to her for 29 years. 232 00:12:25,162 --> 00:12:29,917 I suppose... the best brand is just being yourself. 233 00:12:52,397 --> 00:12:54,107 It's fine. 234 00:13:08,580 --> 00:13:10,290 - Nate? - Yeah? 235 00:13:10,374 --> 00:13:11,375 Do you need something? 236 00:13:11,458 --> 00:13:14,586 No, me? No, me? No, thank you. No, but— 237 00:13:19,550 --> 00:13:22,344 Actually, there is possibly one thing you might be able to help with. 238 00:13:22,427 --> 00:13:23,512 Yeah, come sit down. 239 00:13:23,595 --> 00:13:24,847 Oh, thank you. 240 00:13:32,437 --> 00:13:33,522 Can you make me famous? 241 00:13:34,523 --> 00:13:36,775 No! Nate, you don't wanna be famous. 242 00:13:36,859 --> 00:13:37,901 I don't? 243 00:13:37,985 --> 00:13:40,737 No! There'll be photographers all up your bum. 244 00:13:40,821 --> 00:13:41,989 Oh. Yuck. 245 00:13:42,072 --> 00:13:43,866 Yeah, and tabloids going through your rubbish. 246 00:13:43,949 --> 00:13:44,908 I don't want that. 247 00:13:44,992 --> 00:13:47,286 - Groupies everywhere? - That's not horrible. 248 00:13:47,369 --> 00:13:48,370 Nate. 249 00:13:48,453 --> 00:13:50,539 Come on. You are who you are because of who you are. 250 00:13:51,665 --> 00:13:53,667 Your intelligence and your talent. 251 00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:56,712 You don't wanna go messing around with fame. 252 00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:01,175 I don't know, being famous seems to have some perks though, right? 253 00:14:01,758 --> 00:14:03,886 Famous people get sent so much free shit. 254 00:14:03,969 --> 00:14:05,888 Lot of the time they don't figure out what they want. 255 00:14:05,971 --> 00:14:08,932 I know what I want. A window table at a restaurant. 256 00:14:09,016 --> 00:14:10,017 Is that it? 257 00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:11,977 Well, that plus maybe some of those groupies 258 00:14:12,060 --> 00:14:13,228 you mentioned earlier, but— 259 00:14:14,271 --> 00:14:16,273 No, obviously not. That's— that's degrading. 260 00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:17,733 I didn't mean to— Sorry. 261 00:14:17,816 --> 00:14:18,942 Come with me. 262 00:14:22,404 --> 00:14:23,405 Come on! 263 00:14:30,495 --> 00:14:32,581 Nathan needs a table at a restaurant. 264 00:14:33,332 --> 00:14:34,333 Excellent. 265 00:14:35,125 --> 00:14:36,668 Alain Ducasse at The Dorchester? 266 00:14:36,752 --> 00:14:38,003 L'Atelier Robuchon. 267 00:14:38,837 --> 00:14:40,214 Chiltern Firehouse! 268 00:14:40,297 --> 00:14:43,842 No— It's A Taste of Athens in Tooting. 269 00:14:44,801 --> 00:14:46,011 Did he just say, "Tooting"? 270 00:14:46,094 --> 00:14:48,931 Tooting. It's his parents' favorite place. 271 00:14:49,515 --> 00:14:52,059 Well, it's the place that my dad complains about the least. 272 00:14:52,142 --> 00:14:55,145 Wait, you can't get a table at something called "A Taste of Athens" 273 00:14:55,229 --> 00:14:56,563 in Tooting? 274 00:14:56,647 --> 00:14:57,940 No, it's impossible. 275 00:14:58,023 --> 00:15:00,025 All right. Well, there's a simple solution to that. 276 00:15:00,108 --> 00:15:01,235 I'll just buy the restaurant. 277 00:15:02,694 --> 00:15:04,238 Well, you know the saying? 278 00:15:04,321 --> 00:15:06,240 "You buy a man a table, he eats once. 279 00:15:06,323 --> 00:15:08,408 You teach a man how to get a table 280 00:15:08,492 --> 00:15:10,827 and he eats at that restaurant until it becomes a Starbucks." 281 00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:14,623 Oh, this is silly! Nathan, just be assertive. 282 00:15:14,706 --> 00:15:16,959 Yes. Yes. Yes. 283 00:15:17,042 --> 00:15:18,460 Brilliant. Spectacular. 284 00:15:19,086 --> 00:15:21,004 Lovely. Wonderful. It's wonderful. 285 00:15:21,088 --> 00:15:22,464 Perfect. 286 00:15:22,965 --> 00:15:24,842 Sorry, we just— No. 287 00:15:26,552 --> 00:15:28,011 Oh, my God. 288 00:15:29,429 --> 00:15:30,556 We've got work to do. 289 00:15:36,728 --> 00:15:41,233 I told you, either you take down my photo or you start giving me free kebabs. 290 00:15:41,859 --> 00:15:43,026 7.50, mate. 291 00:15:43,110 --> 00:15:44,194 Fair enough. 292 00:15:46,071 --> 00:15:47,072 No way! 293 00:15:47,155 --> 00:15:49,116 Fancy running into you here, 294 00:15:49,199 --> 00:15:52,494 after asking Keeley where you were and scootin' my boot right over, that is. 295 00:15:52,578 --> 00:15:53,662 She told me to expect 296 00:15:53,745 --> 00:15:56,540 a mustachioed surprise that would anger me. 297 00:15:59,209 --> 00:16:02,504 I thought it was gonna be Wario or my great-aunt Natalie. 298 00:16:02,588 --> 00:16:04,256 I don't know what makes your aunt Natalie so great, 299 00:16:04,339 --> 00:16:06,592 but I appreciate your effusiveness, despite her appearance. 300 00:16:08,719 --> 00:16:10,220 I'll have what he's having. 301 00:16:12,931 --> 00:16:15,517 Why are you bothering me at my kebab place? 302 00:16:15,601 --> 00:16:17,311 This is like my church. 303 00:16:17,394 --> 00:16:20,314 Who knew transubstantiation could happen with a pita? 304 00:16:22,399 --> 00:16:23,901 What do you think about joining the coaching staff? 305 00:16:23,984 --> 00:16:25,360 Fuck off. 306 00:16:25,444 --> 00:16:27,529 That's a solid negotiation tactic right there. 307 00:16:28,155 --> 00:16:29,364 I don't wanna coach. 308 00:16:29,448 --> 00:16:31,825 I like what I'm doing and I'm good at it. 309 00:16:31,909 --> 00:16:35,871 People tweet about me, with JIFs and everything. 310 00:16:35,954 --> 00:16:38,332 I know some folks pronounce it "GIFs", but I hear you. 311 00:16:39,041 --> 00:16:40,876 Look, if you enjoy doing the whole pundit thing, 312 00:16:40,959 --> 00:16:42,753 then you should do it for the rest of your life. 313 00:16:43,670 --> 00:16:45,255 Why won't you let me be happy? 314 00:16:46,215 --> 00:16:48,091 - Here you go, mate. - Thank you. 315 00:16:49,134 --> 00:16:52,095 - You two are father and son, right? - What? No. 316 00:16:52,971 --> 00:16:53,972 I'm his former coach. 317 00:16:54,056 --> 00:16:55,641 It's all the same thing. 318 00:16:55,724 --> 00:16:57,851 You two remind me of me and my old man when I told him 319 00:16:57,935 --> 00:17:00,354 I was leaving medical school a week before graduation. 320 00:17:00,437 --> 00:17:01,522 I bet that's a story. 321 00:17:02,231 --> 00:17:03,774 Would have made a great doctor too. 322 00:17:03,857 --> 00:17:05,108 I was really good at it. 323 00:17:05,192 --> 00:17:08,529 Bedside manner, reading charts, cutting up shit. 324 00:17:10,571 --> 00:17:12,574 But it's just not what I was meant to do. 325 00:17:14,492 --> 00:17:16,411 What? I love making a doner kebab. 326 00:17:17,788 --> 00:17:20,082 Anyway, how's that kebab, my friend? 327 00:17:20,165 --> 00:17:22,542 Well, to quote Drizzy, it's the best I ever had. 328 00:17:22,626 --> 00:17:24,586 Good, right? Cool. 329 00:17:27,214 --> 00:17:29,424 Look, Roy, all kibbles and bits aside, 330 00:17:30,008 --> 00:17:32,636 I'm really just here to ask you for a favor for an old friend. 331 00:17:32,719 --> 00:17:34,304 One Mr. Isaac McAdoo. 332 00:17:35,639 --> 00:17:37,015 He's all up in his head, isn't he? 333 00:17:37,099 --> 00:17:40,227 Yes, he is. And I need him to check out of there by Saturday. 334 00:17:40,310 --> 00:17:41,311 You got any ideas? 335 00:17:43,605 --> 00:17:45,524 Let me finish my kebab and pray on it. 336 00:17:50,946 --> 00:17:51,947 Right there. 337 00:17:53,490 --> 00:17:54,867 For the collection plate. 338 00:17:54,950 --> 00:17:55,951 Later, skater. 339 00:18:01,206 --> 00:18:02,791 Well, this place is ruined now. 340 00:18:06,003 --> 00:18:07,254 Hello, sir. Can I help you? 341 00:18:07,880 --> 00:18:10,382 Yes. Nathan Shelley, party of three. 342 00:18:10,465 --> 00:18:12,301 Let's see, Mr. Shelby. 343 00:18:12,384 --> 00:18:14,344 Yes, Shelby. Sorry, I should have said Shelby. 344 00:18:15,012 --> 00:18:16,638 No. That is not your name. 345 00:18:16,722 --> 00:18:17,973 - It's pretty close. - No, no! 346 00:18:18,056 --> 00:18:19,641 Start again, from the top. 347 00:18:21,476 --> 00:18:23,937 - May I help you? - Yes, Shelley, party of three. 348 00:18:24,021 --> 00:18:25,522 Yes! Mr. Shelfy. 349 00:18:25,606 --> 00:18:27,524 It's Shelley, and you know it, you dithering kestrel! 350 00:18:27,608 --> 00:18:29,443 - Jesus. - No. 351 00:18:29,526 --> 00:18:30,527 Too much. 352 00:18:31,528 --> 00:18:34,531 You don't need to be loud, Nathan. You just need to be commanding. 353 00:18:34,615 --> 00:18:37,075 With all due respect, it's different for me, Miss Welton. 354 00:18:37,159 --> 00:18:38,785 You command every room you walk into. 355 00:18:38,869 --> 00:18:40,579 Oh— Hardly. 356 00:18:40,662 --> 00:18:43,040 Have you ever been in a room full of football club chairmen? 357 00:18:43,123 --> 00:18:44,124 No. 358 00:18:44,208 --> 00:18:45,792 Every time I walk into one of those meetings, 359 00:18:45,876 --> 00:18:48,212 they look at me like some schoolgirl with pigtails. 360 00:18:48,295 --> 00:18:50,881 - Oh, you'd look well fit with pigtails. - I do. 361 00:18:50,964 --> 00:18:51,965 But I have a secret: 362 00:18:53,050 --> 00:18:54,801 I make myself big. 363 00:18:54,885 --> 00:18:56,595 Before I go into the room, 364 00:18:56,678 --> 00:18:59,306 I find somewhere private, I stand up on my tiptoes, 365 00:18:59,389 --> 00:19:02,184 put my arms in the air and make myself as big as possible 366 00:19:02,267 --> 00:19:03,352 to feel my own power. 367 00:19:05,604 --> 00:19:06,605 Like this. 368 00:19:22,246 --> 00:19:24,748 Fuck, you're amazing. Let's invade France. 369 00:19:26,333 --> 00:19:29,378 It's a bit silly, but it works for me. Find your own thing. 370 00:19:29,461 --> 00:19:31,463 But don't back down, Nathan. 371 00:19:32,631 --> 00:19:34,508 You deserve whatever you want. 372 00:19:35,092 --> 00:19:36,468 Yeah. 373 00:19:40,472 --> 00:19:42,599 What the hell are we gonna do with Roy anyway? 374 00:19:42,683 --> 00:19:45,185 Same thing you do when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros, 375 00:19:45,269 --> 00:19:46,270 hell if I know. 376 00:19:47,729 --> 00:19:50,440 Look, Roy just told me to bring you to this address, ready to play. 377 00:19:50,524 --> 00:19:52,442 I didn't press him for details. You know how he gets. 378 00:19:53,068 --> 00:19:54,987 - Fucking crabby, ain't he? - Heck yeah. 379 00:19:55,070 --> 00:19:57,281 Ain't no side-eye like a Roy Kent side-eye. 380 00:19:57,364 --> 00:19:59,199 It's like he's 24-7 hangry. 381 00:19:59,867 --> 00:20:00,868 365. 382 00:20:00,951 --> 00:20:02,911 366 on leap years, baby. 383 00:20:03,537 --> 00:20:05,747 Seriously, do you know where you're going? 384 00:20:05,831 --> 00:20:07,040 Well, no. This is it. 385 00:20:07,124 --> 00:20:09,293 Here, I'll just text him. Let him know we're here. 386 00:20:14,464 --> 00:20:16,258 - Yeah, Roy? - McAdoo. 387 00:20:16,341 --> 00:20:17,968 What we doing here? What— 388 00:20:39,156 --> 00:20:40,282 See that block of flats? 389 00:20:41,700 --> 00:20:44,077 - What? The shit one? - That's where I grew up. 390 00:20:46,205 --> 00:20:47,414 This... 391 00:20:48,081 --> 00:20:49,416 This is where I lived. 392 00:20:50,167 --> 00:20:51,210 Where I learned football. 393 00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:53,337 Every fucking day. 394 00:20:53,837 --> 00:20:56,882 And during my career, when I was going through a bad patch, 395 00:20:56,965 --> 00:20:59,092 I'd come back here and play. 396 00:21:02,346 --> 00:21:03,764 This is Isaac. 397 00:21:05,098 --> 00:21:07,809 These are all the other fucks. You're with them. 398 00:21:08,393 --> 00:21:10,395 You what? You expect me to play with them? 399 00:21:11,563 --> 00:21:13,815 I'm a professional, mate. I'll fucking kill 'em. 400 00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:19,321 We'll see. 401 00:21:20,364 --> 00:21:22,449 - What about me? What do I get to do? - Nothing. 402 00:21:22,533 --> 00:21:23,909 Come on. Can I keep score? 403 00:21:23,992 --> 00:21:25,452 Fine. 404 00:21:25,536 --> 00:21:27,162 All right, I'm gonna use my fingers. 405 00:21:27,246 --> 00:21:28,330 It's zero-zero! 406 00:21:28,413 --> 00:21:30,624 - Nil-nil. - It is nil-nil. 407 00:21:38,298 --> 00:21:41,051 Hello. Shelley, party of three. 408 00:21:41,134 --> 00:21:43,095 Let's see, Shelley. 409 00:21:43,178 --> 00:21:44,304 No! My name— 410 00:21:44,388 --> 00:21:46,807 Sorry, yes, that's correct. 411 00:21:46,890 --> 00:21:50,185 In fact, that's all our names. That's my dad there and my mum as well. 412 00:21:50,269 --> 00:21:51,937 Yeah, we're all Shelleys. 413 00:21:52,020 --> 00:21:54,189 - A gaggle of Shelleys. - Stop blabbing up the young lady. 414 00:21:54,273 --> 00:21:56,024 - Your mother's hungry. - Stop it, Lloyd. 415 00:21:56,108 --> 00:21:57,526 Forgive your father, my darling. 416 00:21:57,609 --> 00:22:00,195 He's been wanting this saganaki all week. 417 00:22:00,737 --> 00:22:04,616 As you may remember, it's their 35th wedding anniversary. Jade. 418 00:22:05,284 --> 00:22:06,493 Of course. 419 00:22:08,537 --> 00:22:09,538 Right this way. 420 00:22:20,674 --> 00:22:23,760 Sorry, if you remember, I requested the window table? 421 00:22:23,844 --> 00:22:26,555 Sorry, we don't take reservations for the window table. 422 00:22:31,852 --> 00:22:33,145 Excuse me one moment. 423 00:22:58,003 --> 00:23:00,839 You are Nathan fucking Shelley. 424 00:23:10,641 --> 00:23:11,642 Be right back. 425 00:23:11,725 --> 00:23:13,060 Don't get too comfortable. 426 00:23:20,275 --> 00:23:23,028 Jade, this is a special night for my parents, 427 00:23:23,111 --> 00:23:24,404 and the window table is open. 428 00:23:24,488 --> 00:23:26,865 So, here is what I would love to see happen. 429 00:23:28,033 --> 00:23:29,660 You're gonna give us that table, 430 00:23:29,743 --> 00:23:31,912 and then my family and I are gonna order a starter, 431 00:23:31,995 --> 00:23:34,456 main course, little dessert, a bottle of wine. 432 00:23:34,540 --> 00:23:38,043 And you are going to be stunned by how quickly a gaggle of Shelleys 433 00:23:38,126 --> 00:23:40,379 can get through a three-course meal and get out of here. 434 00:23:40,462 --> 00:23:41,505 So what do you say? 435 00:23:42,381 --> 00:23:43,382 Okay. 436 00:23:46,552 --> 00:23:48,011 Mum, Dad. 437 00:23:48,595 --> 00:23:50,472 Perhaps you'd like to give me your number as well? 438 00:23:50,556 --> 00:23:52,140 No, that's okay. 439 00:23:53,350 --> 00:23:54,434 Sorry, I'm picky. 440 00:23:55,644 --> 00:23:56,645 Me too. I— 441 00:23:57,938 --> 00:23:59,106 I'm not a dog. 442 00:24:08,198 --> 00:24:09,199 Thank you. 443 00:24:20,752 --> 00:24:23,255 Hey, Roy! Sure you don't wanna play? 444 00:24:23,338 --> 00:24:25,591 You on one leg is better than this fool on two. 445 00:24:36,185 --> 00:24:37,561 Take that, you little bitch. 446 00:24:37,644 --> 00:24:41,899 Easy, mate. I think you hurt him. Emotionally. 447 00:24:43,066 --> 00:24:46,612 What the fuck, Roy? Did you bring me 'round here to get my leg broke? 448 00:24:46,695 --> 00:24:47,696 No. 449 00:24:47,779 --> 00:24:52,201 I brought you here to remind you that football is a fucking game 450 00:24:52,284 --> 00:24:54,203 that you used to play as a fucking kid. 451 00:24:54,286 --> 00:24:55,495 'Cause it was fun, 452 00:24:55,996 --> 00:24:58,123 even when you were getting your fucking legs broken 453 00:24:58,207 --> 00:24:59,625 or your fucking feelings hurt. 454 00:25:00,209 --> 00:25:01,460 So, fuck your feelings, 455 00:25:01,543 --> 00:25:04,379 fuck your overthinking, fuck all that bullshit, 456 00:25:04,463 --> 00:25:08,884 go back out there and have some fucking fun. 457 00:25:12,638 --> 00:25:14,264 All right, game on. 458 00:25:19,978 --> 00:25:21,063 Was that all right? 459 00:25:21,605 --> 00:25:22,606 That was great. 460 00:25:23,607 --> 00:25:24,650 Too many fucks? 461 00:25:25,526 --> 00:25:26,777 I don't know. 462 00:25:26,860 --> 00:25:29,196 Kinda like all the nipples in that movie, Showgirls. 463 00:25:29,279 --> 00:25:30,697 Halfway through, you don't even notice. 464 00:25:30,781 --> 00:25:33,158 You just kinda get sucked into the narrative. 465 00:25:34,368 --> 00:25:36,078 I dated Gina Gershon once. 466 00:25:37,579 --> 00:25:38,872 That makes me happy. 467 00:25:40,040 --> 00:25:41,166 Get off me! 468 00:25:53,887 --> 00:25:55,138 Come on. 469 00:26:06,275 --> 00:26:07,526 All right. Come on! 470 00:26:16,994 --> 00:26:18,745 You gotta be kidding me. 471 00:26:19,329 --> 00:26:20,372 Come on! 472 00:26:23,959 --> 00:26:26,086 McAdoodle-doo! 473 00:26:26,587 --> 00:26:28,213 McAdoodle-doo! 474 00:26:28,297 --> 00:26:29,464 Come on! 475 00:26:36,930 --> 00:26:38,432 Nice work tonight, Coach. 476 00:26:38,515 --> 00:26:40,601 Do you really think I'm gonna fall for this shit? 477 00:26:40,684 --> 00:26:41,810 Fall for what? 478 00:26:42,644 --> 00:26:45,606 You're trying to get me to come back to the club and coach. 479 00:26:45,689 --> 00:26:46,732 It won't work. 480 00:26:46,815 --> 00:26:48,400 Roy, I got zero interest— 481 00:26:48,483 --> 00:26:52,070 Excuse me, nil interest in making you do something that ain't in your heart. 482 00:26:53,530 --> 00:26:55,199 So, you're really not playing games? 483 00:26:55,282 --> 00:26:56,450 Maybe a little. 484 00:26:57,451 --> 00:26:58,452 I'm sorry, Roy, 485 00:26:59,369 --> 00:27:01,288 but I came here tonight 'cause when you realize 486 00:27:01,371 --> 00:27:03,999 you wanna spend the rest of your life coaching with somebody, 487 00:27:04,082 --> 00:27:06,043 you want the rest of your life to begin ASAP. 488 00:27:06,710 --> 00:27:07,711 Please stop. 489 00:27:08,295 --> 00:27:09,796 You complete our team. 490 00:27:09,880 --> 00:27:11,131 You're an asshole. 491 00:27:11,215 --> 00:27:14,760 I'm also just a coach, standing in front of a boy, 492 00:27:14,843 --> 00:27:16,136 - asking him if— - Listen, 493 00:27:16,220 --> 00:27:18,347 I'm never coming back to Richmond. 494 00:27:18,430 --> 00:27:20,182 Not now, not ever. 495 00:27:21,808 --> 00:27:22,976 Now fuck off. 496 00:27:27,231 --> 00:27:28,565 As you wish. 497 00:27:38,909 --> 00:27:40,786 Hey, I'm sorry about that, Coach. 498 00:27:40,869 --> 00:27:44,623 - Set your alarm for p.m. Instead of a.m.? - Yes, sir, Steve Kerr. Thank you. 499 00:27:44,706 --> 00:27:46,959 - Still, you got down here pretty quick. - Yeah, well, 500 00:27:47,042 --> 00:27:49,670 I think a fella should only take as long as the tune "Easy Lover" 501 00:27:49,753 --> 00:27:52,256 by Phil Collins and Philip Bailey to get dressed in the morning. 502 00:27:52,339 --> 00:27:53,799 - Makes sense. - Yeah. 503 00:27:54,466 --> 00:27:58,637 It is a beautiful Saturday, and we are playing Sheffield Wednesday. 504 00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:00,848 - Aka "The Owls." - Hey, how 'bout that? 505 00:28:00,931 --> 00:28:02,558 Hey, you never finished your joke. 506 00:28:03,183 --> 00:28:04,184 What joke? 507 00:28:04,268 --> 00:28:05,727 What does a British owl say? 508 00:28:06,228 --> 00:28:07,271 Oh, right. 509 00:28:08,021 --> 00:28:09,982 Whom. Whom. 510 00:28:12,192 --> 00:28:13,277 Worth the wait. 511 00:28:30,210 --> 00:28:32,296 We had season tickets for Richmond. 512 00:28:32,379 --> 00:28:33,839 My family was well-off. 513 00:28:33,922 --> 00:28:36,133 I was a young punk that snuck in every week. 514 00:28:36,216 --> 00:28:38,719 My father wanted us in the best seats in the house. 515 00:28:38,802 --> 00:28:41,346 I sat there because she was there. 516 00:28:41,430 --> 00:28:43,765 My mother and my boyfriend were furious. 517 00:28:43,849 --> 00:28:46,018 They wanted to call security to kick him out. 518 00:28:46,101 --> 00:28:47,936 But she insisted that I should stay. 519 00:28:48,478 --> 00:28:51,481 - And we fell in love. - And we fell in love. 520 00:28:52,399 --> 00:28:55,110 Years later, a close friend of the family 521 00:28:55,194 --> 00:28:58,197 used the same story line for the film Titanic. 522 00:28:58,280 --> 00:29:00,407 And we've been in litigation ever since. 523 00:29:01,033 --> 00:29:03,327 - Together. - Together. 524 00:29:05,579 --> 00:29:07,956 - Come on, Richmond! - Richmond! 525 00:29:24,056 --> 00:29:25,849 Just stop with the foreplay. 526 00:29:25,933 --> 00:29:28,227 Tell him you own Richmond and that you're fucking fit. 527 00:29:42,491 --> 00:29:43,867 - Coach. - Doctor. 528 00:29:43,951 --> 00:29:45,744 Floor. Ceiling. 529 00:29:45,827 --> 00:29:46,954 Trash can. 530 00:29:47,037 --> 00:29:48,121 Now you go. 531 00:29:48,830 --> 00:29:50,958 I was just checking in. See how you're feeling. 532 00:29:51,041 --> 00:29:53,043 Oh, well, that's mighty nice of you. 533 00:29:53,126 --> 00:29:54,461 How am I feeling? 534 00:29:54,545 --> 00:29:55,546 I don't know, you know? 535 00:29:55,629 --> 00:29:58,715 I— I'm just dealing with the terror of knowing what this world is about, 536 00:29:58,799 --> 00:30:00,008 you know? 537 00:30:00,092 --> 00:30:02,553 Watching a few good friends screaming to let them out. 538 00:30:03,762 --> 00:30:05,305 So, you're feeling under pressure? 539 00:30:05,389 --> 00:30:06,974 Ba ba ba be doo 540 00:30:08,016 --> 00:30:09,852 Well, my door is always open. 541 00:30:09,935 --> 00:30:10,978 Then why even have one? 542 00:30:11,061 --> 00:30:13,730 Heck, Coach Beard could take that thing out for ya Jack Torrance style 543 00:30:13,814 --> 00:30:14,857 with eight good whacks. 544 00:30:14,940 --> 00:30:16,191 Five good whacks. 545 00:30:16,275 --> 00:30:18,485 Lumberjack World Championship qualifier, baby! 546 00:30:19,778 --> 00:30:22,030 That man has had many lives, many masters. 547 00:30:22,114 --> 00:30:24,616 Oh, snap! Hottie alert. Look at this guy. 548 00:30:25,409 --> 00:30:26,952 Hot-cha-cha. 549 00:30:27,035 --> 00:30:28,370 Game day suit. I love it. 550 00:30:28,453 --> 00:30:29,746 Not too much? 551 00:30:29,830 --> 00:30:31,665 What? Too much class? No such thing. 552 00:30:35,085 --> 00:30:38,088 If you are out to describe the truth, leave elegance to the tailor. 553 00:30:41,675 --> 00:30:45,345 Hey, I appreciate you checking in, Doc. All right. Let's go, Greyhounds! 554 00:30:46,346 --> 00:30:47,556 And we're back. 555 00:30:47,639 --> 00:30:48,974 Let's round off the Premier League 556 00:30:49,057 --> 00:30:51,476 with Arsenal heading on the road to Newcastle, 557 00:30:51,560 --> 00:30:54,688 where 17-year-old Matthew Kerr will make his debut. 558 00:30:54,771 --> 00:30:58,192 They're calling him the Irish Ronaldo. What can we expect today? 559 00:30:58,275 --> 00:31:01,278 Well, I think we can expect to see a commanding performance from the lad. 560 00:31:01,361 --> 00:31:03,238 Roy, what do you think he'll do today? 561 00:31:03,322 --> 00:31:05,699 I don't know. He's 17. 562 00:31:05,782 --> 00:31:08,160 He'll probably have chips for dinner and a wank before bed. 563 00:31:08,243 --> 00:31:10,412 Oh, apologies for the language. 564 00:31:10,495 --> 00:31:12,998 Roy, I was looking for some insight 565 00:31:13,582 --> 00:31:15,042 about how he'll play. 566 00:31:15,125 --> 00:31:16,418 I told you, I don't know. 567 00:31:17,794 --> 00:31:19,379 All we do is sit around here 568 00:31:19,463 --> 00:31:22,132 and guess what a bunch of little pricks are gonna go and do out there, 569 00:31:22,216 --> 00:31:23,383 then we come back at halftime, 570 00:31:23,467 --> 00:31:26,720 and we complain 'cause they didn't do exactly what we thought they'd do. 571 00:31:27,930 --> 00:31:29,223 We don't know. 572 00:31:30,891 --> 00:31:32,351 Of course we don't know. 573 00:31:34,311 --> 00:31:36,021 We're not in the locker rooms with them. 574 00:31:36,104 --> 00:31:37,439 We're not on the pitch with them. 575 00:31:37,523 --> 00:31:40,192 We can't look 'em in the eyes and encourage them to be better 576 00:31:40,275 --> 00:31:42,444 than they ever thought they were capable of being. 577 00:31:43,862 --> 00:31:44,863 We're just— 578 00:31:46,031 --> 00:31:48,575 We're just on the outside looking in. 579 00:31:50,327 --> 00:31:51,328 Judging them. 580 00:31:54,248 --> 00:31:55,499 Okay, Roy. 581 00:31:55,582 --> 00:31:59,878 Well, here's a look at your old team warming up in an interesting new way. 582 00:31:59,962 --> 00:32:01,463 Hey! 583 00:32:13,892 --> 00:32:15,978 Look, it's all pretty loosey-goosey, isn't it? 584 00:32:16,061 --> 00:32:17,145 Especially for a team 585 00:32:17,229 --> 00:32:19,481 that's at the business end of the relegation zone. 586 00:32:19,565 --> 00:32:22,401 But it is good to see McAdoo with a smile on his face. 587 00:32:22,484 --> 00:32:25,320 He's been a shadow of himself all season. 588 00:32:25,404 --> 00:32:27,823 I wonder what's gotten into him. 589 00:32:27,906 --> 00:32:29,825 Oh, dang. Yeah, come on, now. Come on, man. 590 00:32:29,908 --> 00:32:32,327 Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. 591 00:32:32,828 --> 00:32:33,829 Pow. 592 00:32:34,746 --> 00:32:36,623 There you go. All right. Gentleman. 593 00:32:41,003 --> 00:32:43,714 Bloody cold out there today. Bet you don't miss that, Roy. 594 00:32:44,214 --> 00:32:45,257 What? 595 00:32:45,340 --> 00:32:47,593 Said, I bet you don't miss the cold, hey, Roy? 596 00:32:49,178 --> 00:32:50,429 I miss all of it. 597 00:32:52,181 --> 00:32:53,182 'Scuse me. 598 00:32:54,057 --> 00:32:56,101 - What are you doing? - I'm sorry, fellas. 599 00:32:56,685 --> 00:32:58,103 This isn't what I'm meant to do. 600 00:33:03,192 --> 00:33:04,193 Roy! 601 00:33:05,986 --> 00:33:08,989 Jeff, I have to go. 602 00:33:38,060 --> 00:33:40,229 Thank you. Cheers, Ben. 603 00:33:42,856 --> 00:33:44,691 - You're Roy Kent. - No, I'm not. 604 00:33:45,734 --> 00:33:47,819 All right, I am. Take me to Nelson Road. 605 00:33:47,903 --> 00:33:49,112 No. Headed home. 606 00:33:49,196 --> 00:33:51,573 It's me anniversary, mate, and I haven't bought a present. 607 00:33:55,702 --> 00:33:56,954 Fuck. 608 00:33:58,121 --> 00:34:00,332 Right, my wife loves cash. 609 00:34:00,415 --> 00:34:01,416 Cheers. 610 00:34:20,060 --> 00:34:22,478 Sorry, mate, this is as far as I can get ya. 611 00:34:24,523 --> 00:34:27,442 I'll tell you the thing Nikki Sixx said in the Mötley Crüe Behind the Music. 612 00:34:27,525 --> 00:34:29,570 - "You gotta date your wife." - Thanks, Roy. 613 00:34:36,952 --> 00:34:38,203 Fuck! 614 00:34:39,288 --> 00:34:41,331 Fuck. Fuck. 615 00:34:45,668 --> 00:34:46,795 You see this new watch? 616 00:34:46,879 --> 00:34:49,214 You get me to Nelson Road in ten minutes, it's yours. 617 00:34:49,297 --> 00:34:50,299 Get in. 618 00:35:08,525 --> 00:35:09,860 Cheers. 619 00:35:11,028 --> 00:35:12,321 No! 620 00:35:18,076 --> 00:35:19,703 - I've gotta get in there. - Do you have a ticket? 621 00:35:19,786 --> 00:35:22,623 - I can't let anyone in without a ticket. - I'm Roy Kent. 622 00:35:22,706 --> 00:35:23,999 - He does look like him. - A little. 623 00:35:24,082 --> 00:35:25,209 Around the mouth. 624 00:35:25,292 --> 00:35:26,376 For fuck's sake. 625 00:35:29,922 --> 00:35:32,216 I believe you're holding a ticket for Reba McEntire. 626 00:35:39,598 --> 00:35:41,642 Good to see you back, Reba. 627 00:35:43,393 --> 00:35:45,187 Dad. Dad. 628 00:35:48,357 --> 00:35:49,942 - Enjoy the game. - Fuck you. 629 00:35:50,025 --> 00:35:51,026 It is you. 630 00:35:54,404 --> 00:35:56,114 Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. 631 00:36:36,363 --> 00:36:37,364 Look! 632 00:36:42,703 --> 00:36:45,163 Holy shit. 633 00:36:45,247 --> 00:36:48,792 He's here! He's there! He's every fucking where! 634 00:36:48,876 --> 00:36:52,004 Roy Kent! Roy Kent! 635 00:36:52,087 --> 00:36:54,381 He's here! Here's there! He's every fucking where! 636 00:36:54,464 --> 00:36:57,384 Roy Kent! Roy Kent! 637 00:37:19,740 --> 00:37:20,908 Hello, Coach. 638 00:37:22,242 --> 00:37:23,952 - Really glad you decided to— - Shut up. 639 00:37:24,453 --> 00:37:25,662 Just shut up. 640 00:37:26,663 --> 00:37:28,373 You had me at "Coach."