You know, Donna, I'm not surprised you're in my bed.
I knewyou couldn't resist me any longer.
No, I couldn't.
I want you.
I need you.
Well, I never turn down a woman in need.
You know, being here, in your bed...
on your Spider-Man sheets...
it makes me feel so ready...
so willing.
Then call me able.
Wait. A little mood music.
&&
Damn.
- What's wrong?
I mean— Hey, baby.
& Hangin'out&
& Down the street&
& The same old thing&
& We did last week&
& Not a thing to do &
& But talk toyou&
& We're all all right &
& We're all all right &&
Hello, Wisconsin!
I can't bel ieve you're in my bed! I can't believe you came through my window.
I know. I was just sitting at home, thinking about you...
and I thought, why don't I crawl up the side of his house and say hello.
So, hello.
Hello.
Did— Did anyone seeyou?
Um, just Hyde.
- Excuse me.
I heard a noise downstairs, and it scared me.
Man, you're ruining what could be the most important night of my life here.
Well, duh. Hey!
This is so— I can't believe this!
- You've never been in my bed before. - I know.
- I'm in your bed! - You're in my bed!
You're in my bed!
You're in my bed.
&&
Okay, uh, because the bed squeaks, because the walls are thin...
because Red has the ears of a wolf.
- Uh, reasons my parents might hear us if we do it! - Right!
Okay. Uh, uh— "Gee, Mom, it was hot, so we took off our clothes...
and then we got cold, so we got under the covers and things just started bouncing around."
- Things I might say if my folks catch us doing it! - Yes! Okay.
- Fonda, Ford, the eighth. - Famous Henrys!
Yes! Okay. Uh, uh—
Because there's a girl in your bed.
Because there's a girl in your bed!
Because there's a girl in your bed, damn it!
- Reasons to go for it! - Yes!
So, I, uh—
Oh, so she's gonna be out the whole week?
Well, you don't drink and go ice fishing.
That is just common sense.
No, no, no, it's fine. I'll be happy to pick up her shifts. Okay, uh-huh. Bye.
Aw, geez, Kitty, you work so hard as it is.
- I don't want you working double shifts. - Red, we need the money.
It's not everyweek that Charlene's gonna get septicemia from a rusty hook.
We have gotta take advantage of that.
- Well, I don't like it. - Oh, you know, if I'm gonna be working nights...
I better put some meals together for you and the boys.
Oh, come on, Kitty. I'm not helpless.
I think I can get these guys some dinner.
Okay, yeah, um—
I'm sureyou'll be great.
The fire extinguisher's in the garage.
- So, money's a little tight, huh? - No, no, Steven.
Everything's fine. We're great.
Good morning.
And I am not just saying that.
Listen, your mother's working double shifts, so I'll be cooking.
You know the fire extinguisher's in the garage, right?
Yeah, I know.
I'm gonna have cereal.
Oh, you'll be having a lot of cereal.
So, where's Donna, man?
Donna?
Donna? Oh!
You mean that girl who spent last night in my bed?
Yeah, yeah, that's the one.
She went home this morning.
So? Huh?
Huh?
So?
So, let's just say she went home a very happywoman.
- All right, man. You finally did it. - Yeah.
You know, "it"...
can mean a lot of things.
No, "it" means one thing.
And you either did it or you didn't.
Okay, then we didn't.
Butwe did plenty of good stuff.
New stuff.
Plenty of good, new stuff.
God, man, you're bumming me out. Couldn'tyou have at least just lied to me?
Uh, okay, we did it.
Liar.
So, doyou like photos, man?
Yeah, man. Sure.
Okay, you got the job, man.
Just like that? You don't have to interview anybody else?
Nobody else showed up, man.
So, what do I do here, anyway?
Well, I don't expect a lot, man.
Like, pretty much if the hut doesn't burn down, it's been a good day.
And even if it burnt down, man, it's cool...
'cause I got three or four more of these little huts somewhere.
Hey, listen, if you see one of these huts, would you give me a call, man?
Or even better, I could take a picture.
Whoa!
A picture of a Fotohut.
Hey, that'd be like art or something, huh?
Hey, listen, man.
I hopeyou don't mind if I payyou in cash.
I don't like big brother getting into my business, you dig?
Man, keeping the government out of it. I'm sowith you.
No, my big brother, man.
He's always hitting me up for money.
Oh. 'Causeyou're the responsible one?
Yeah, it's my curse, man.
Hey, listen, I gotta go, uh...
do a thing at a place.
Yeah, man, I hear that.
You want me to lock up when I'm done?
Lock up?
Wow, that's a great idea, man.
Hey, you're one of those idea men, aren'tyou, man?
Yeah. Maybe someday you'll be working for me, huh?
Really?
Oh, that'd be cool, man.
Hey, but can I have Saturday night off?
Cool.
- So, you know what? - What?
I can't tell you.
Oh, my God. Now you have to tell me.
Even if it's not about me, I wanna hear it.
I was really bad last night.
Did you shoplift? I knew it!
No! I slept with Eric last night.
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Was it great?
Yeah, I was asleep.
- Ew! - No!
No, Jackie, we were both asleep.
So nothing happened?
Well, you know, some things happened.
But we mostly slept.
You mean, you were in his bed...
and he didn't whine and beg for, like, two hours...
until you were so sick ofhearing his stupid voice...
thatyou just gave in so he would shut up?
No.
I love him. He just, like, held me all night.
Oh, my God. That's so sweet!
Michael is just after me all the time.
I mean, I understand, 'cause I'm sexy and all, but still.
Like, he always says, "Why cuddle when we could do it?"
- Well, was he always like that? - No.
I guess things kind of changed afterwe did it, but in a good way.
I love it when Eric holds me.
Yeah, I love it when Michael buys me stuff.
Well, guys, I'm a little ashamed to admit this, but... I got a job.
Yeah, I'm thinking about getting a job at a chip factory.
I gotta know how they do this!
Red won't let me get a job.
He says if I don't study hard and get into college...
once I turn 18 he's gonna kill me, and I think he's serious, man.
Hyde, did you ever stop to think...
howyou working would make me go to the mall alone today?
You didn't think, did you?
No, sorry.
Hey, guys, check this out, man.
Forman had Donna in his bed last night, and he didn't even do it.
What's up?
You're a bonehead, man.
I'm not a bonehead. I mean, we did other stuff, and we cuddled.
It was great.
Sometimes when I'm alone, I just love to cuddle.
Forman, she climbed up the trellis of your house...
through yourwindow, to get into bed with you and cuddle?
Sorry, man, I never read that letter in Penthouse.
Those stories are true, you know.
Whywould you just cuddle with herwhen you could do it?
I mean, Forman, doin' it is "it."
That's why they call it "it."It!"
Guys, it was just one night. There are gonna be lots of other nights.
Eric, opportunity does not knock, and then ring the doorbell...
and then knock again, and then leave a note that says...
"Sorry I missed you," and then call you on the phone—
Yeah, we get it, Fez. And we get "it."
What my foreign friend here is trying to say, Forman, is that you blew it, man.
And you blew "it," man.
I'm losing my patience with you, man.
You gotta get with her. I mean, there's nothing more beautiful...
than when two people fit together perfectly like—
well, like two of these potato—
How do they do this?
- Hey. - Yeah?
You wanna eat this?
No.
Well, it's in there if you changeyour mind.
You know, I loved being here with you the other night.
That's great. 'Cause I loved thatyou came over.
It didn't, like, botheryou that I was sleeping with you in your little, single bed?
No, it bothered me, but in a really good way.
Good.
Good. Um, so...
you wanna come over tonight?
Yeah, cool. I'd love to.
Great, 'cause I'm, like, wide open here.
Cool. So I'll seeyou tonight?
Okay.
Geez. You didn't eat that fish, did ya?
'Cause I was just kidding.
- No. - All right then.
Stop acting weird.
Hello, Mr. Forman. How areyou doing today?
Damn!
That pot's no good.
That pot would not have boiled over had you put some salad oil in the water.
Soyou know how to boil water.
Don't you have some place you need to be?
Not really. If I go home too early, my host parents make me read Scripture.
Well, why don't you, uh, go sit in the basement?
All right!
Well, what doya know?
Hadji had it right.
Hey, man.
So this is whereyou work, huh?
That's what they say.
Hey, won'tyou get in trouble if the boss shows up?
Oh, no! Is the boss here?
Hey, wait. I'm the boss.
You know, maybe third time's the charm.
Maybe this time it'll be really, really super.
Ta-da!
Oh my gosh, Red.
Fried chicken and mashed potatoes.
Coleslaw.
Oh, and a little half an ear of corn.
Oh! I forgot the biscuits.
Ow!
Nice, huh?
Oh, it's really nice.
Where'd you hide the bucket, Red?
- Here. Have a Wet-Nap.
All right, the Colonel.
Oh, uh, hereya go.
Well, now what is this?
Look, I got a job, all right? And I don't wanna hear anything about...
"We're fine" because I know money's tight around here...
and you won't let Forman work, so just take the money and drop it!
Oh, he's a keeper.
You know, I'm gonna take that money and open him a savings account.
Well, that's nice, Red.
Or blow it all on booze. I still haven't made up my mind.
Ah, it's my good friend Eric.
So, what will it be? Gilligan's Island? Pinball?
Stratego? You decide.
Well, actually, Fez, Donna's coming over tonight...
so I'm just here to get my BarryWhite album.
- Otherwise, I would just— - Blah, blah, blah. Just go.
&&
Oh, baby, I am readyfor love.
- Hi.
Hello. I've been expecting you.
- Yawn. So, you ready for bed? - Sure.
What, no Spider-Man sheets?
Well, I... just use those on wash days.
Eric, can we like slow down for a second?
Sure.
Well, remember the other night when we just like cuddled all night?
I really liked that.
Right, yeah.
But I was thinking...
why cuddle when we could do it?
Okay, you've been talking to those idiots in the basement again.
No!
Yes!
Look, Eric, I know it's a long drive.
And we're gonna get there. We're gonna get there.
But, I don't know, I just wanna see some trees along the way.
Okay. But I'll be driving?
- You'll be driving. - Okay.
- You swear to God? - I do! I swear to God.
- Okay. - Okay, good.
Because I do love you.
But I'm not gonna take my pants off.
- Okay. - Okay.
Would you be more comfortable if I put mine back on?
- I might sleep better. - Will do.
&&
Hey, what areyou doin', man?
You turn that thing off and get ready forwork!
I'm not working today, man. I got an earache.
Earache, my eye! How'd you like a butt ache?
Now, get your little fanny perpendicular and open the hut! You got it?
What a hard-ass, man.