1 00:00:02,619 --> 00:00:05,744 Wow, Hyde. I can't believe it. Your own set of wheels. 2 00:00:05,819 --> 00:00:09,013 Yep. She is the best thing that ever happened to me. 3 00:00:09,086 --> 00:00:12,075 Oh, except for that one time Kelso swallowed that fishhook. 4 00:00:12,152 --> 00:00:15,414 That was pretty cool too. 5 00:00:15,486 --> 00:00:17,883 Yeah, that was one magic trick I could never get right. 6 00:00:19,453 --> 00:00:22,112 All right, Hyde, this car is fine... 7 00:00:22,186 --> 00:00:25,016 but, I mean, it's no Vista Cruiser. 8 00:00:25,086 --> 00:00:27,018 How many miles you gettin' to the gallon? 9 00:00:27,086 --> 00:00:30,211 - Oh, about 11. - Damn! Okay, fine. 10 00:00:30,286 --> 00:00:33,548 But, you know, the Vista Cruiser can seat eight- 11 00:00:33,619 --> 00:00:35,552 nine if someone sits on the stain. 12 00:00:36,919 --> 00:00:38,851 Yeah, okay, Forman, but do you have any idea... 13 00:00:38,919 --> 00:00:41,851 how many chicks I can fit in the flatbed? 14 00:00:41,919 --> 00:00:43,942 Thirty-two. And that's with Big Rhonda. 15 00:00:46,319 --> 00:00:48,046 Damn! 16 00:00:48,119 --> 00:00:50,210 Eww! 17 00:00:54,353 --> 00:00:56,818 Oh, hello. 18 00:00:56,885 --> 00:00:58,817 What are you doing back there, Fez? 19 00:00:58,885 --> 00:01:00,851 L- I was- 20 00:01:00,919 --> 00:01:04,249 I was just showing Caroline the back of my new car and my tongue. 21 00:01:05,885 --> 00:01:08,181 Fez, this isn't your car. 22 00:01:08,252 --> 00:01:11,480 Yeah. Foreigners can't drive here unless it's a cab. 23 00:01:14,453 --> 00:01:16,577 Shut up. 24 00:01:16,652 --> 00:01:20,880 Isn't he cute? Fezzie, I told you. You don't have to try and impress me anymore. 25 00:01:20,952 --> 00:01:22,884 I'm your girlfriend now. 26 00:01:22,952 --> 00:01:26,009 I'm sorry, Caroline. From now on, I will be totally honest. 27 00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:28,643 - Good. Now, come on, walk me home. - Ah, yes. 28 00:01:28,719 --> 00:01:31,879 And on the way, I can tell you about the time I killed a shark with a coconut. 29 00:01:36,453 --> 00:01:40,544 All right, Kelso, let's go out cruising for hot chicks with self-esteem problems. 30 00:01:42,585 --> 00:01:44,983 Yeah. No, thanks, man. I don't do that stuff anymore. 31 00:01:45,052 --> 00:01:47,382 Shut up and come on. 32 00:01:47,453 --> 00:01:49,850 No, man, I mean it. I've matured. 33 00:01:51,719 --> 00:01:53,651 Hey, Donna, wanna go to the mall? 34 00:01:53,719 --> 00:01:57,208 Rerun from What's HaPPening is opening up the new Dairy Queen. 35 00:01:58,652 --> 00:02:01,982 Actually, Jackie, as fun as that sounds, um, no. 36 00:02:03,952 --> 00:02:07,577 What? "Hey, hey, hey." 37 00:02:07,652 --> 00:02:09,914 - I'm in. - Okay. 38 00:02:09,986 --> 00:02:12,248 Well, let me get my beret and some Certs with Retsyn. 39 00:02:13,652 --> 00:02:15,584 Cool. 40 00:02:15,652 --> 00:02:19,675 Wait a second. You're too mature to go cruising with me, but you go to the mall with Jackie? 41 00:02:19,752 --> 00:02:22,616 Yeah. It's this new thing we're trying, man. We're friends. 42 00:02:22,685 --> 00:02:27,380 See, I did some reflecting, and I realized thatJackie is the only girl I want to be with. 43 00:02:28,552 --> 00:02:31,451 Today? 44 00:02:31,518 --> 00:02:33,814 No, every day. 45 00:02:33,885 --> 00:02:38,181 See, we were meant to be together. She just doesn't know it yet. 46 00:02:38,252 --> 00:02:40,581 Yeah, but I have a plan. 47 00:02:40,652 --> 00:02:44,050 - Oh, no. - Oh, yeah. 48 00:02:44,119 --> 00:02:46,983 See, she wants to be just friends, right? 49 00:02:47,052 --> 00:02:51,677 Okay, so I'll be her friend. But what she doesn't realize is that I'm also a boy. 50 00:02:53,685 --> 00:02:58,845 Yeah, and sooner or later, friend is gonna lead down the path to boy. 51 00:02:58,919 --> 00:03:01,385 And then I'll be her friend-boy. 52 00:03:02,752 --> 00:03:04,684 That is a great plan. 53 00:03:06,252 --> 00:03:08,343 - Okay, I'm ready. - Hey. Let's go, friend. 54 00:03:08,419 --> 00:03:10,351 Okay. 55 00:03:12,785 --> 00:03:15,717 That is such a bad plan. 56 00:03:15,785 --> 00:03:17,876 Yeah, but, you know, on the bright side... 57 00:03:17,952 --> 00:03:21,850 maybe we'll be there when it all blows up in his face. 58 00:03:24,919 --> 00:03:27,646 Hangin'out 59 00:03:28,919 --> 00:03:30,851 Down the street 60 00:03:32,719 --> 00:03:34,651 The same old thing 61 00:03:36,485 --> 00:03:38,417 We did last week 62 00:03:39,685 --> 00:03:44,209 Not a thing to do 63 00:03:44,286 --> 00:03:47,683 But talk to you 64 00:03:47,752 --> 00:03:49,479 We're all all right 65 00:03:49,552 --> 00:03:51,415 We're all all right 66 00:03:51,485 --> 00:03:54,213 Hello, Wisconsin.! 67 00:04:03,286 --> 00:04:05,774 Hey, Mrs. Forman. Happy birthday. 68 00:04:07,619 --> 00:04:09,676 Ohh. 69 00:04:10,719 --> 00:04:12,685 I can't believe you remembered. 70 00:04:12,752 --> 00:04:16,014 You are the first person to say anything all day. 71 00:04:20,019 --> 00:04:24,111 And how did you know I needed more flashbulbs? 72 00:04:24,186 --> 00:04:26,118 Thank you. 73 00:04:28,019 --> 00:04:30,247 - So, do you wanna stay for dinner? - Oh, no, thanks. 74 00:04:30,319 --> 00:04:32,716 - I'm just gonna grab a sandwich. - A sandwich! 75 00:04:32,785 --> 00:04:36,013 Steven, a sandwich is a sandwich, but a Manwich is a meal. 76 00:04:37,452 --> 00:04:40,350 - Oh, well, thanks, Mrs. Forman. - Uh-huh. 77 00:04:41,785 --> 00:04:45,149 Hey, Mom, what's for dinner? I'm starving. 78 00:04:45,219 --> 00:04:48,878 - Manwiches. - Again? 79 00:04:48,952 --> 00:04:51,440 Ahh, we just had those. 80 00:04:51,518 --> 00:04:54,450 Kitty, I left my shirt on the bed. It needs to be ironed for tomorrow. 81 00:04:54,518 --> 00:04:57,678 - Okay. - Oh, and, uh... 82 00:04:57,752 --> 00:05:01,514 I know you think I forgot, but I didn't. 83 00:05:01,585 --> 00:05:05,642 Oh, Red, I knew you'd remember. 84 00:05:05,719 --> 00:05:08,844 Yep, the check for the plumber is on the dresser. 85 00:05:10,752 --> 00:05:12,684 Oh. 86 00:05:14,019 --> 00:05:16,484 Good. 87 00:05:18,086 --> 00:05:20,711 Um... 88 00:05:20,785 --> 00:05:22,717 is there anything else to eat? 89 00:05:25,752 --> 00:05:28,082 Well, you know what, honey? 90 00:05:30,552 --> 00:05:33,712 I don't give a good gosh darn what you eat! 91 00:05:42,152 --> 00:05:45,016 Wow, she's really upset. 92 00:05:45,086 --> 00:05:48,449 Yeah. Nice goin'. 93 00:05:50,086 --> 00:05:53,882 See, the boatneck adds dimension to your shoulders. 94 00:05:53,952 --> 00:05:56,918 And the plum color- that really accents your jewel-toned eyes. 95 00:05:59,852 --> 00:06:03,477 Oh, my God. Michael, you just described my perfect outfit. 96 00:06:03,552 --> 00:06:05,541 You are so good at this. 97 00:06:05,619 --> 00:06:08,847 Yeah, I have a knack for ensembles. 98 00:06:11,952 --> 00:06:15,009 Hey, Hyde, how goes the cruising for chicks? 99 00:06:15,086 --> 00:06:19,041 It was going fine till I hit a patch of ice and almost took out a few of'em. 100 00:06:19,119 --> 00:06:21,051 Big Rhonda cracked my brake light. 101 00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:28,049 Hi. 102 00:06:28,119 --> 00:06:30,812 - Hey. - Have you seen Fez? 103 00:06:30,885 --> 00:06:34,408 Uh, no. He went bowling with his host parents. 104 00:06:34,485 --> 00:06:37,974 Damn him! I'm sorry. 105 00:06:38,052 --> 00:06:40,847 I was just hoping he'd be here so we could study together. 106 00:06:40,919 --> 00:06:43,078 Now I have to walk home alone in the dark. 107 00:06:43,152 --> 00:06:45,709 It's scary out there. Somebody ran over Big Rhonda. 108 00:06:48,819 --> 00:06:51,751 - Um, do you want a- - Okay! 109 00:06:51,819 --> 00:06:54,047 Ride? 110 00:06:54,119 --> 00:06:57,482 You know, Michael, I'm really enjoying our time together. 111 00:06:57,552 --> 00:06:59,541 Really? Me too. 112 00:06:59,619 --> 00:07:02,915 Yeah, you know, the makeup, shopping, braiding each other's hair- 113 00:07:02,986 --> 00:07:06,349 - you are like the girlfriend I never had. - Oh. 114 00:07:06,418 --> 00:07:10,248 Well, thanks, Jackie. L-Wait. 115 00:07:10,318 --> 00:07:12,250 - Girlfriend? 116 00:07:12,318 --> 00:07:14,250 Yeah. I mean, Donna's nice and everything... 117 00:07:14,318 --> 00:07:16,910 but she kinda dresses like a trucker. 118 00:07:21,986 --> 00:07:24,645 [TV] 119 00:07:26,785 --> 00:07:28,717 The Waltons. 120 00:07:29,885 --> 00:07:32,248 Now, there's a grateful family. 121 00:07:33,652 --> 00:07:35,311 Mmm. 122 00:07:38,152 --> 00:07:40,913 And, boy, did they love their mother. 123 00:07:44,218 --> 00:07:46,616 Oh, great. 124 00:07:46,685 --> 00:07:48,844 I think I've got athlete's foot. 125 00:07:54,452 --> 00:07:56,418 I am- l- I am going to bed. 126 00:08:02,719 --> 00:08:04,878 Where'd your mother go? 127 00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:07,918 To bed. 128 00:08:07,986 --> 00:08:09,918 Man, what's wrong with her anyway? 129 00:08:09,986 --> 00:08:13,543 Oh, who knows? She's been moody all day. 130 00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:16,915 Let me see the TVGuide. 131 00:08:16,986 --> 00:08:19,077 Ahh. Let's see. What day is it? 132 00:08:20,151 --> 00:08:23,481 Ah, it's the 13th. 133 00:08:23,552 --> 00:08:26,575 It seems to me I was supposed to do something on the 13th. 134 00:08:28,118 --> 00:08:30,607 Oh, good Lord! 135 00:08:32,385 --> 00:08:34,908 You forgot your mother's birthday! 136 00:08:38,485 --> 00:08:42,247 Oh, no. Dad, this is bad. This is very, very bad. 137 00:08:42,318 --> 00:08:45,375 All right. Don't start gettin' all twitchy. 138 00:08:47,552 --> 00:08:49,950 Now, we gotta think. 139 00:08:53,052 --> 00:08:55,075 Let's watch CHiPs and think. 140 00:09:02,251 --> 00:09:05,081 So, Fez is really nice, huh? 141 00:09:05,151 --> 00:09:08,016 - Yeah, Fez is a good guy. - Yeah. 142 00:09:09,385 --> 00:09:11,817 You know, sometimes, when I'm trying to sleep at night... 143 00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:15,180 I think about how much it would hurt if he ever left me. 144 00:09:15,251 --> 00:09:17,183 And then I say, "Fez would never leave me." 145 00:09:17,251 --> 00:09:20,877 But then I say, "We've only been going out for a short time. Maybe he would leave me." 146 00:09:22,986 --> 00:09:26,918 So then, I hold my breath until my lungs are about to explode... 147 00:09:26,986 --> 00:09:29,918 because that's how much I think it would hurt if he ever did leave me. 148 00:09:36,552 --> 00:09:39,211 And then, when I regain consciousness... 149 00:09:41,051 --> 00:09:43,711 I start breathing again, and everything's fine. 150 00:09:43,785 --> 00:09:46,013 Oops. There's my house. Thanks! Bye! 151 00:09:48,785 --> 00:09:50,876 - See ya. 152 00:09:56,418 --> 00:09:59,714 Happy birthday! 153 00:10:02,685 --> 00:10:04,617 Oh, you remembered? 154 00:10:04,685 --> 00:10:08,640 Well, of course we remembered, honey. 155 00:10:08,719 --> 00:10:12,082 We just figured that we'd wait till there was only 15 minutes left in the day... 156 00:10:12,151 --> 00:10:14,083 and you were good and mad... 157 00:10:14,151 --> 00:10:17,743 and then we'd sneak up here and surprise the hell out of you. 158 00:10:17,819 --> 00:10:20,250 Wow, what a good plan. 159 00:10:20,318 --> 00:10:23,307 'Cause I was awfully mad. 160 00:10:23,385 --> 00:10:26,351 Yeah. We really had you going. 161 00:10:28,051 --> 00:10:30,040 Here, Mom. Open this one first. 162 00:10:30,118 --> 00:10:32,607 - It's from me. - Well, thank you, honey. 163 00:10:38,619 --> 00:10:41,676 Oh, a map of Wisconsin. 164 00:10:43,251 --> 00:10:46,115 Oh, well, thank you. 165 00:10:46,185 --> 00:10:49,981 And, Mom, I got you these balloons too. 166 00:10:52,752 --> 00:10:56,275 "Knock out the knock-knocks at Schiffy's Gas-N-Go." 167 00:10:57,385 --> 00:10:59,317 Huh. 168 00:10:59,385 --> 00:11:01,374 Wait, Kitty, there's more! 169 00:11:15,852 --> 00:11:17,784 A funnel. 170 00:11:17,852 --> 00:11:21,147 'Cause I know how much you like to pour things. 171 00:11:24,385 --> 00:11:29,511 Well, um, either these gifts are really thoughtful... 172 00:11:29,585 --> 00:11:33,312 or you bought a bunch of crap at the gas station! 173 00:11:33,385 --> 00:11:37,579 - What? - Oh, admit it, Red Forman. You forgot my birthday. 174 00:11:37,652 --> 00:11:39,914 - Quick, Dad, give her the lighter. 175 00:11:43,619 --> 00:11:45,642 Look, Kitty, I'm sorry. 176 00:11:45,719 --> 00:11:47,651 But it's just- 177 00:11:48,951 --> 00:11:51,713 Well, marking the calendar is your responsibility. 178 00:11:51,785 --> 00:11:54,182 Oh. 179 00:11:54,251 --> 00:11:57,149 Dad, no. 180 00:12:09,685 --> 00:12:12,207 Ah, good morning, sunshine. 181 00:12:12,285 --> 00:12:14,478 So, what's for breakfast? 182 00:12:14,552 --> 00:12:16,484 A funnel. 183 00:12:18,418 --> 00:12:20,350 Ow. 184 00:12:22,251 --> 00:12:25,149 What the heck makes Jackie think I'm her girlfriend? 185 00:12:26,385 --> 00:12:29,044 All I did was pick out a few of her outfits... 186 00:12:29,118 --> 00:12:31,744 paint her nails and give her a facial. 187 00:12:32,819 --> 00:12:34,751 Gee, I don't know, Denise. 188 00:12:36,018 --> 00:12:37,950 Um, guys, can we go inside? 189 00:12:38,018 --> 00:12:40,450 I'm freezing my choo-choos off. 190 00:12:40,518 --> 00:12:44,006 No way. I'm not going in there. 191 00:12:44,085 --> 00:12:46,017 I forgot my mom's birthday. 192 00:12:46,085 --> 00:12:49,949 Really? 'Cause I remembered your mom's birthday. 193 00:12:50,018 --> 00:12:53,712 - If you remembered, why didn't you tell me? - How would that be funny? 194 00:12:57,418 --> 00:13:00,043 I don't ever have to worry about forgetting Caroline's birthday. 195 00:13:00,118 --> 00:13:03,084 She wrote it on my arm with permanent marker. 196 00:13:04,485 --> 00:13:07,882 - Isn't she sweet? - More like psycho. 197 00:13:07,951 --> 00:13:10,440 What are you doing calling my girlfriend psycho? 198 00:13:10,518 --> 00:13:12,949 I'm sorry, Fez, did I say psycho? 199 00:13:13,018 --> 00:13:16,416 I meant nut bag, head case, wackadoo. 200 00:13:16,485 --> 00:13:19,144 She chokes herself, man. 201 00:13:20,585 --> 00:13:23,210 Well, Hyde, maybe- maybe you should- 202 00:13:23,285 --> 00:13:25,876 maybe you should choke yourself! 203 00:13:27,318 --> 00:13:29,250 Good day. 204 00:13:29,318 --> 00:13:31,375 - Fez- - I said good day! 205 00:13:35,118 --> 00:13:37,482 Man, what fun is it being a girlfriend... 206 00:13:37,552 --> 00:13:39,983 if you don't even have your own boobs to play with? 207 00:13:48,552 --> 00:13:51,017 So what, Kelso? So you're her girlfriend. 208 00:13:51,085 --> 00:13:54,142 What could possibly be so bad about that? 209 00:13:54,218 --> 00:13:57,207 L-I'll tell you what could be so bad. 210 00:13:57,285 --> 00:14:00,978 Oh, Michael, this is the happiest day of my life. 211 00:14:12,784 --> 00:14:15,216 Thank you so much for being my maid of honor. 212 00:14:15,285 --> 00:14:17,842 That's what girlfriends do. 213 00:14:17,918 --> 00:14:19,850 I'm just honored you asked me. 214 00:14:24,418 --> 00:14:26,350 Yeah, but... 215 00:14:26,418 --> 00:14:29,781 you know, on the flip side, try to think about your life withoutJackie at all. 216 00:14:56,985 --> 00:14:59,849 Wow. That's even worse. 217 00:15:01,652 --> 00:15:04,913 Hey, girlfriends sometimes make out together, right? 218 00:15:07,385 --> 00:15:12,079 Yeah, usually right after long, sweaty pillow fights. 219 00:15:12,151 --> 00:15:14,878 Yeah, man, it happens all the time. 220 00:15:14,951 --> 00:15:17,718 All right! 221 00:15:22,585 --> 00:15:24,948 Hey, Mrs. Forman. 222 00:15:26,085 --> 00:15:29,051 - Is Eric home? - Eric? 223 00:15:29,118 --> 00:15:33,016 Oh, you mean my son, the map giver. 224 00:15:33,085 --> 00:15:35,244 I don't know, and I don't care. 225 00:15:36,718 --> 00:15:40,549 - Mrs. Forman, are you okay? - Oh, I am just freakin' fine! 226 00:15:44,151 --> 00:15:46,878 What happened? 227 00:15:46,951 --> 00:15:49,474 Well, you know I love my family. 228 00:15:49,552 --> 00:15:54,143 It's just sometimes I want to get in the car and run 'em all over. 229 00:15:55,918 --> 00:15:57,850 They forgot my birthday. 230 00:15:57,918 --> 00:16:00,407 I'm gonna go kick Eric's ass right now! 231 00:16:00,485 --> 00:16:03,212 No. I mean, it's one thing when they don't notice... 232 00:16:03,285 --> 00:16:05,944 when I get my hair done differently- which they don't- 233 00:16:06,018 --> 00:16:09,280 but this is my birthday. 234 00:16:09,351 --> 00:16:11,374 Oh, I don't know. Maybe I expect too much. 235 00:16:11,452 --> 00:16:14,350 No, Mrs. Forman, you have every right to be mad. 236 00:16:14,418 --> 00:16:18,077 In fact, you should be madder. You're, like, the best mom in the world. 237 00:16:18,151 --> 00:16:20,481 Yeah! 238 00:16:20,552 --> 00:16:22,484 Thank you, Donna. 239 00:16:22,552 --> 00:16:25,575 I just wish my own family would say that once in a while. 240 00:16:30,585 --> 00:16:32,914 Oh, sweetie, that's not your breakfast, is it? 241 00:16:33,984 --> 00:16:38,144 - Yeah. - Oh. 242 00:16:38,218 --> 00:16:41,378 Why don't you just let me make you some nice waffles instead? 243 00:16:41,452 --> 00:16:43,475 Oh, cool. I love frozen waffles. 244 00:16:43,552 --> 00:16:47,075 Oh, honey. No, no, no, no. 245 00:16:47,151 --> 00:16:49,583 I make my waffles from scratch. 246 00:16:51,552 --> 00:16:53,484 Those bastards! 247 00:16:56,884 --> 00:16:58,816 Now, would you look at her boobs? 248 00:16:58,884 --> 00:17:00,816 I am. 249 00:17:02,285 --> 00:17:04,842 And it's- it's disgusting. 250 00:17:04,918 --> 00:17:08,748 I mean, what is she thinking, packing in those sweet melons like that? 251 00:17:10,085 --> 00:17:12,017 I can't even look away. 252 00:17:14,151 --> 00:17:17,549 You know, Michael, I have to say, I'm really enjoying our new friendship together. 253 00:17:17,617 --> 00:17:20,049 - I love spending time with you. - Me too. 254 00:17:20,118 --> 00:17:22,606 Do you wanna go to your house and have a nice, sweaty pillow fight? 255 00:17:22,684 --> 00:17:24,616 Okay. 256 00:17:33,051 --> 00:17:36,040 - Hello, Caroline. - Oh, hi, Fez. 257 00:17:36,118 --> 00:17:38,640 So, hey, listen, just, uh-just curious... 258 00:17:38,718 --> 00:17:40,650 um... 259 00:17:42,085 --> 00:17:44,483 do you sometimes choke yourself? 260 00:17:44,552 --> 00:17:49,609 Yeah. But I only do it because I love you more than anything in the world. 261 00:17:51,151 --> 00:17:53,242 Okay, I'm good with that. 262 00:17:53,318 --> 00:17:55,341 I'll get you a soda, lover. 263 00:17:55,418 --> 00:17:57,509 Don't forget to breathe while I'm gone. 264 00:18:00,318 --> 00:18:03,375 Hey, so how's it going with "Mental Mary"? 265 00:18:04,918 --> 00:18:06,850 I owe you an apology, Hyde. 266 00:18:06,918 --> 00:18:09,248 She is crazy. 267 00:18:09,318 --> 00:18:11,545 But she's crazy for me. 268 00:18:22,918 --> 00:18:25,884 Yeah. Oh! Here she comes. 269 00:18:42,984 --> 00:18:45,711 Oh, my God. She didn't even look at us. 270 00:18:45,784 --> 00:18:48,909 - I don't think I've ever seen Mom so mad. Have you? 271 00:18:48,984 --> 00:18:51,677 - Not since she stopped drinking. - What? 272 00:18:54,351 --> 00:18:56,408 Nothing. 273 00:18:56,484 --> 00:19:00,247 Look, obviously your mother's very upset about something. 274 00:19:00,318 --> 00:19:03,341 And desperate times call for desperate measures. 275 00:19:03,418 --> 00:19:05,350 For the last 10 years... 276 00:19:05,418 --> 00:19:08,077 she's been asking us to do something... 277 00:19:08,151 --> 00:19:10,776 and every time we say no. 278 00:19:10,851 --> 00:19:14,908 Because what she wants is the most horrible thing in the world. 279 00:19:17,551 --> 00:19:19,710 I won't do it. 280 00:19:21,251 --> 00:19:23,410 Oh, you will do it. 281 00:19:23,484 --> 00:19:27,178 And you will like it! 282 00:19:27,251 --> 00:19:30,376 Need a partner Turn the partner by the right hand round 283 00:19:34,151 --> 00:19:37,548 I can't believe we're finally square dancing. 284 00:19:37,617 --> 00:19:40,379 Oh, this is so much fun. 285 00:19:49,584 --> 00:19:51,880 It looks like "Hee-Haw" puked in here. 286 00:19:52,918 --> 00:19:55,146 Come on, honey, let's dance. 287 00:19:57,484 --> 00:20:00,575 Oh, my God. This is awful. 288 00:20:00,651 --> 00:20:03,243 She made me waffles. Now promenade, you son of a bitch! 289 00:20:07,318 --> 00:20:08,977 Bow to your partner corners, all 290 00:20:09,051 --> 00:20:10,812 Circle to the left go around that hall 291 00:20:10,884 --> 00:20:12,713 Circle to the left all around you go 292 00:20:12,784 --> 00:20:14,409 When you're there and then 293 00:20:14,484 --> 00:20:16,212 Do an allemande left with the corner maid 294 00:20:16,285 --> 00:20:18,217 Do-si-do with a partner there 295 00:20:18,285 --> 00:20:20,046 Then start by the left in the middle 296 00:20:20,118 --> 00:20:23,175 Go all the way around and then pick up your partner with an arm around 297 00:20:23,251 --> 00:20:25,546 Start a Promenade and go around that town 298 00:20:25,617 --> 00:20:28,049 Then when you're there, ladies you backtrack 299 00:20:28,118 --> 00:20:29,674 Go the other way around 300 00:20:29,751 --> 00:20:32,047 Meet a Partner Turn the Partner by the right hand round 301 00:20:32,118 --> 00:20:34,084 And back to the corner for an allemande left 302 00:20:34,151 --> 00:20:36,174 Buck right in for right and left grand 303 00:20:36,251 --> 00:20:38,716 Whoo-hee 304 00:20:40,684 --> 00:20:44,639 So, Mom, we found this present we just had to get you. 305 00:20:44,718 --> 00:20:46,775 So, happy birthday. 306 00:20:46,851 --> 00:20:51,045 Ohh. I thought square dance night was my present. 307 00:20:51,118 --> 00:20:55,379 It is. But we really messed up this year. 308 00:20:55,451 --> 00:20:58,247 - Well, we're sorry. - Ohh. 309 00:21:04,718 --> 00:21:06,741 "World's Darn Tootin'est Mom." 310 00:21:09,384 --> 00:21:11,317 Do you really think so? 311 00:21:11,384 --> 00:21:13,283 You're darn tootin'. 312 00:21:18,651 --> 00:21:21,209 Okay. Well- 313 00:21:21,285 --> 00:21:23,443 I think I've had enough do-si-dos for one night. 314 00:21:23,517 --> 00:21:27,415 So, what do you say we all go home and have hot fudge sundaes? 315 00:21:27,484 --> 00:21:29,280 - Oh, yes. - Thank God. 316 00:21:29,350 --> 00:21:31,714 Bastards. 317 00:21:37,251 --> 00:21:39,012 - Valentine's Day. - Check. 318 00:21:40,384 --> 00:21:43,146 - Anniversary. - Check. 319 00:21:43,218 --> 00:21:45,706 - Mother's Day. - Check. 320 00:21:45,784 --> 00:21:48,545 Well, I think we got 'em all. 321 00:21:48,617 --> 00:21:52,072 Uh, Dad, we forgot her birthday again. 322 00:21:52,151 --> 00:21:55,639 Damn it, Eric, pay attention! 323 00:21:57,218 --> 00:21:59,581 Valentine's Day. 324 00:21:59,651 --> 00:22:01,810 Check. 325 00:22:01,884 --> 00:22:05,146 - Anniversary. - Check. 326 00:22:05,218 --> 00:22:07,150 - Mother's Day. - Check.