1 00:00:03,164 --> 00:00:06,600 So if'x" equals seven, then "y" equals- 2 00:00:06,667 --> 00:00:09,761 - Two? - Wrong. Kelso? 3 00:00:09,837 --> 00:00:11,771 Uh... 4 00:00:11,839 --> 00:00:13,864 "L"? 5 00:00:15,342 --> 00:00:18,004 Also wrong. It's a pretty simple equation, guys. 6 00:00:18,078 --> 00:00:20,945 Just think about it for a second. 7 00:00:22,516 --> 00:00:24,609 You're so pretty. 8 00:00:24,685 --> 00:00:27,711 You don't even need to know math. 9 00:00:27,788 --> 00:00:31,690 That's so weird. I was just thinking the same thing. 10 00:00:31,759 --> 00:00:36,128 Steven, you're so pretty you don't need to know nothin'. 11 00:00:36,197 --> 00:00:40,531 - That's good, 'cause I'm stupid. 12 00:00:40,601 --> 00:00:43,263 Oh, real mature, guys. 13 00:00:48,976 --> 00:00:52,139 - Fez, what happened? - I was walking back from the pep rally... 14 00:00:52,213 --> 00:00:55,649 flush with school spirit... 15 00:00:55,716 --> 00:00:59,652 when-when-when some boys from Fort Anderson, they jumped me... 16 00:00:59,720 --> 00:01:02,587 and they slapped me, and they beat me- 17 00:01:02,656 --> 00:01:06,752 And look at what they did to my pom-poms. 18 00:01:10,164 --> 00:01:12,530 Hey, that's not funny, man. 19 00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:14,932 It's really not. 20 00:01:15,002 --> 00:01:18,403 They spray painted me on my ass. 21 00:01:21,375 --> 00:01:26,278 I want revenge against those Fort Anderson Snapping Turtles. 22 00:01:26,347 --> 00:01:28,281 Look, Fez, I'll tell you what. 23 00:01:28,349 --> 00:01:30,943 Let's go to the garage, and I'll get you some paint thinner. 24 00:01:31,018 --> 00:01:33,953 - Ay, no. - I'm sorry, Fez. It has to be done. 25 00:01:34,021 --> 00:01:37,457 Yeah, and the three of us have to watch. 26 00:01:37,524 --> 00:01:41,016 Fine. But this time, no smoking. 27 00:01:42,596 --> 00:01:44,791 Great. Now maybe we can get some work done. 28 00:01:44,865 --> 00:01:47,959 Michael's so sweet. 29 00:01:48,035 --> 00:01:49,969 Uh-oh. 30 00:01:50,037 --> 00:01:52,130 - He's just so- - No! 31 00:01:52,206 --> 00:01:55,266 - Do you think that Michael and l- - Don't even say it, Jackie. 32 00:01:55,342 --> 00:01:58,834 - I think maybe- - I'll kill myself, I swear to God. 33 00:01:58,912 --> 00:02:00,880 He and I should get back together. 34 00:02:00,948 --> 00:02:04,907 Jackie, do you remember how Kelso cheated... 35 00:02:04,985 --> 00:02:08,421 and hurt you and lied to you? 36 00:02:08,489 --> 00:02:10,423 Listen to yourself, Donna. 37 00:02:10,491 --> 00:02:14,655 "Cheat-ed."Hurt-ed." "Lie-duh." 38 00:02:15,829 --> 00:02:18,764 It's all ancient history. 39 00:02:18,832 --> 00:02:20,766 But when we look into each other's eyes... 40 00:02:20,834 --> 00:02:23,029 I know we're both thinking about the same thing. 41 00:02:23,103 --> 00:02:25,697 Your hair? 42 00:02:25,773 --> 00:02:29,106 No. That we're meant to be together. 43 00:02:29,176 --> 00:02:31,110 Look, I need to know that he's really changed. 44 00:02:31,178 --> 00:02:33,442 I need to test him somehow. 45 00:02:33,514 --> 00:02:35,448 - I agree. - You do? 46 00:02:35,516 --> 00:02:38,781 Absolutely. If you get back with Kelso, you better have him tested. 47 00:02:42,756 --> 00:02:45,088 Hangin'out 48 00:02:46,694 --> 00:02:48,685 Down the street 49 00:02:50,497 --> 00:02:52,488 The same old thing 50 00:02:54,268 --> 00:02:56,259 We did last week 51 00:02:57,471 --> 00:03:01,999 Not a thing to do 52 00:03:02,076 --> 00:03:05,477 But talk to you 53 00:03:05,546 --> 00:03:07,275 We're all all right 54 00:03:07,348 --> 00:03:09,213 We're all all right 55 00:03:09,283 --> 00:03:11,683 Hello, Wisconsin.! 56 00:03:20,561 --> 00:03:22,927 Okay. I want to see if Michael is ready... 57 00:03:22,996 --> 00:03:25,260 to be in a healthy, adult relationship... 58 00:03:25,332 --> 00:03:28,358 so I've come up with five psychological tests. 59 00:03:28,435 --> 00:03:32,064 Damn, Jackie. He can't even spell "psychological." 60 00:03:32,139 --> 00:03:35,438 Look, besides, he only has to get three out of five. 61 00:03:35,509 --> 00:03:38,307 And the first test is on maturity. 62 00:03:40,848 --> 00:03:42,782 Oh, man. 63 00:03:42,850 --> 00:03:46,286 So we're trying to get the paint off of Fez's butt, right? 64 00:03:46,353 --> 00:03:49,288 So I started to spray lighter fluid on it. 65 00:03:49,356 --> 00:03:52,018 And Fez gets all mad, right? 66 00:03:52,092 --> 00:03:56,119 And then he started chasing me, but he had his Pants around his ankles. 67 00:03:56,196 --> 00:03:58,460 So then he tripped and fell, and I think he hurt himself... 68 00:03:58,532 --> 00:04:01,000 but I don't know, 'cause I was, like, out of there. 69 00:04:01,068 --> 00:04:04,128 So what's going on with you guys? 70 00:04:04,204 --> 00:04:06,229 Donna and I were discussing our careers. 71 00:04:06,306 --> 00:04:08,399 I'm going to high-end cosmetics... 72 00:04:08,475 --> 00:04:11,808 and Donna thinks she'll make a great lumberjack. 73 00:04:17,151 --> 00:04:20,643 Stop telling everybody that. 74 00:04:20,721 --> 00:04:23,417 So what kind of career do you see yourself in? 75 00:04:23,490 --> 00:04:27,085 Okay, well, I was considering becoming a doctor. 76 00:04:27,161 --> 00:04:30,096 Ooh. A doctor? That's so mature. 77 00:04:30,164 --> 00:04:33,656 Or... a rodeo clown. 78 00:04:37,838 --> 00:04:41,604 Rodeo clown? You want to be a rodeo clown. Why? 79 00:04:41,675 --> 00:04:45,270 Rodeo clowns are the unsung heroes of the new West. 80 00:04:45,345 --> 00:04:48,678 And you know I've always enjoyed being inside of barrels. 81 00:04:54,521 --> 00:04:56,819 Cheese puffs! Ow! 82 00:04:56,890 --> 00:04:58,824 Well, see, they're not for you. 83 00:04:58,892 --> 00:05:01,520 They're for Bob and Midge's party. 84 00:05:01,595 --> 00:05:03,688 Oh. Bob and Midge are having a party? 85 00:05:03,764 --> 00:05:05,698 Well, I can't go. 86 00:05:05,766 --> 00:05:07,700 I'm very, uh... 87 00:05:07,768 --> 00:05:09,702 busy. 88 00:05:09,770 --> 00:05:12,568 Oh, wait. Bob didn't invite you? 89 00:05:12,639 --> 00:05:16,200 No, but thanks for the heads-up. I'll be sure to avoid them. 90 00:05:16,276 --> 00:05:19,245 Huh. Midge didn't invite me either. 91 00:05:19,313 --> 00:05:21,247 But I'm sure they're having a party. 92 00:05:21,315 --> 00:05:24,876 I saw them bring a keg and a lot of chairs into the house. 93 00:05:24,952 --> 00:05:27,250 Well, you don't know that they're having a party. 94 00:05:27,321 --> 00:05:32,623 Bob's out of work. The two of them might be starting some weirdo church. 95 00:05:36,029 --> 00:05:38,759 You know, the kind of church where you, uh... 96 00:05:38,832 --> 00:05:41,699 sit around on chairs and drink beer. 97 00:05:43,504 --> 00:05:45,438 I'm sure Midge will be over any minute- 98 00:05:45,506 --> 00:05:48,942 the last minute, like always, to invite us. 99 00:05:49,009 --> 00:05:50,943 I tell ya. 100 00:05:51,011 --> 00:05:54,208 I like the sound of a beer church. 101 00:05:59,353 --> 00:06:02,550 Hi, neighbor. I have something I want to ask you. 102 00:06:02,623 --> 00:06:05,490 - Oh, really? - Can I borrow your big punch bowl? 103 00:06:05,559 --> 00:06:07,550 A big punch bowl? 104 00:06:07,628 --> 00:06:09,596 Oh, my, what would that be for? 105 00:06:12,165 --> 00:06:14,099 Uh-oh. 106 00:06:14,167 --> 00:06:16,101 I should have thought this through. 107 00:06:16,169 --> 00:06:18,729 You know, forget about it. I'm gonna get someone else to bring it. 108 00:06:18,805 --> 00:06:22,297 And by "someone else," I mean Bob. 109 00:06:22,376 --> 00:06:24,310 Midge, l- 110 00:06:24,378 --> 00:06:26,403 I already made your cheese puffs. 111 00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:29,415 Ooh, thanks. Mmm! 112 00:06:29,483 --> 00:06:33,419 Boy, all these cheese puffs are really gonna come in handy. 113 00:06:33,487 --> 00:06:36,251 'Cause Bob's so hungry. 114 00:06:36,323 --> 00:06:39,224 We're not having a party. 115 00:06:43,697 --> 00:06:46,723 Okay, this next test is about consideration. 116 00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:49,268 I want to see if he'll choose my interests over his. 117 00:06:49,336 --> 00:06:52,601 This is gonna be so funny. 118 00:06:55,208 --> 00:06:58,769 - Grape. - So Michael- 119 00:06:58,845 --> 00:07:00,870 There are two events occurring this weekend. 120 00:07:00,948 --> 00:07:02,882 One that you might like... 121 00:07:02,950 --> 00:07:05,510 and one that I would really, really, really... 122 00:07:05,586 --> 00:07:07,520 really want to go to. 123 00:07:09,823 --> 00:07:12,724 Now, should we go see the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders- 124 00:07:12,793 --> 00:07:15,353 Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders. 125 00:07:15,429 --> 00:07:19,593 - Yes, or- - No. Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders. 126 00:07:19,666 --> 00:07:25,070 - But Michael, I want- - No. Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders! 127 00:07:26,840 --> 00:07:29,274 See? Funny. 128 00:07:36,984 --> 00:07:39,248 Kelso, what are you doing? 129 00:07:39,319 --> 00:07:41,253 We're just tossing around this egg... 130 00:07:41,321 --> 00:07:43,448 Jackie gave me to take care of. 131 00:07:47,327 --> 00:07:49,591 Don't you think it might break? 132 00:07:49,663 --> 00:07:52,097 Yeah, uh, well, we just thought... 133 00:07:52,165 --> 00:07:55,430 we'd have some fun with it before I threw it at somebody. 134 00:07:55,502 --> 00:07:57,436 You are such a moron. 135 00:07:57,504 --> 00:07:59,438 - You are so gonna failJackie's test. 136 00:07:59,506 --> 00:08:02,236 Test? What test? 137 00:08:02,309 --> 00:08:04,368 I'm not supposed to say anything, butJackie's testing you... 138 00:08:04,444 --> 00:08:06,378 to see if you're ready to get back together. 139 00:08:06,446 --> 00:08:08,380 Oh, my God. Are you serious? 140 00:08:09,950 --> 00:08:12,885 - Do you think I have a chance? - Not a good one. 141 00:08:12,953 --> 00:08:15,547 You've already failed two tests and you're about to fail the third. 142 00:08:15,622 --> 00:08:17,920 That egg is a test of your parenting ability. 143 00:08:23,630 --> 00:08:26,428 So what you're saying is if I break that egg... 144 00:08:26,500 --> 00:08:28,900 then I fail the test, and loseJackie... 145 00:08:28,969 --> 00:08:32,598 the girl I love more than anything in the world? 146 00:08:34,307 --> 00:08:37,174 - Hyde, give me the egg. - Okay, catch. 147 00:08:55,996 --> 00:08:58,260 Whoops. 148 00:08:58,331 --> 00:09:00,731 I mean- 149 00:09:14,648 --> 00:09:16,707 Okay, you guys... 150 00:09:16,783 --> 00:09:18,717 let's do this for Fez. 151 00:09:18,785 --> 00:09:22,414 Finally my butt cheeks will be avenged. 152 00:09:35,135 --> 00:09:37,126 Voilà. 153 00:09:38,872 --> 00:09:42,239 Guys, I feel like we accomplished something today. 154 00:09:42,309 --> 00:09:45,176 I feel like we made a difference. 155 00:09:45,245 --> 00:09:49,739 Oh, I'm not done yet. Taste my wrath, Snapping Turtles. 156 00:10:03,463 --> 00:10:05,397 That was a close one. 157 00:10:10,203 --> 00:10:12,637 Crap! The janitor locked us in. 158 00:10:12,706 --> 00:10:16,267 Yep. No good deed goes unpunished. 159 00:10:16,343 --> 00:10:19,710 Oh, my God. How could this get any worse? 160 00:10:19,780 --> 00:10:22,044 Okay, guys... 161 00:10:22,115 --> 00:10:25,915 we have 20 seconds until the cherry bomb in the toilet goes off. 162 00:10:49,409 --> 00:10:51,343 - Hey, guys. - Hi. 163 00:10:51,411 --> 00:10:55,074 - What's that? - Oh, it's just this little... 164 00:10:55,148 --> 00:10:58,083 crib-like thing I made for Eggy. 165 00:11:03,690 --> 00:11:07,023 - Eggy? - Yeah, I named him. 166 00:11:07,093 --> 00:11:09,425 I don't know, this egg is, like, bringing out... 167 00:11:09,496 --> 00:11:12,158 all the parental stuff in me. 168 00:11:12,232 --> 00:11:16,032 Michael, what happened to the pencil mark I made on the bottom? 169 00:11:17,037 --> 00:11:18,971 Oh. 170 00:11:19,039 --> 00:11:22,236 Must have come off when I was giving him his gentle bath. 171 00:11:25,378 --> 00:11:27,312 Nice. 172 00:11:27,380 --> 00:11:29,439 Michael, I knew you had this in you. 173 00:11:29,516 --> 00:11:32,576 - You are gonna make a great dad one day. - Yeah. 174 00:11:32,652 --> 00:11:36,554 Uh-oh. Somebody needs a change. 175 00:11:44,097 --> 00:11:46,122 [TV] 176 00:11:46,199 --> 00:11:48,292 Oh, I just can't believe Midge would do this... 177 00:11:48,368 --> 00:11:50,666 after all the years we've been friends. 178 00:11:52,138 --> 00:11:54,629 She took the cheese puffs. 179 00:11:54,708 --> 00:11:57,142 All the cheese puffs? 180 00:11:57,210 --> 00:12:00,702 What the hell? I wanted some of those. 181 00:12:00,780 --> 00:12:03,578 Red, this isn't about the cheese puffs. 182 00:12:03,650 --> 00:12:06,915 Well, maybe not for you. 183 00:12:06,987 --> 00:12:09,922 They're so light and fluffy. 184 00:12:09,990 --> 00:12:12,220 - This is all your fault. - What? 185 00:12:12,292 --> 00:12:14,226 You're always mean to them. 186 00:12:14,294 --> 00:12:16,228 Now you've driven them away. I hope you're happy. 187 00:12:16,296 --> 00:12:18,764 Actually, Kitty, I am happy. 188 00:12:18,832 --> 00:12:20,766 Them not inviting us to the party... 189 00:12:20,834 --> 00:12:23,598 is not the end of the world. 190 00:12:23,670 --> 00:12:28,767 In fact, it's the start of a beautiful new world- 191 00:12:28,842 --> 00:12:33,677 a world where we don't get invited to the Pinciottis'. 192 00:12:33,747 --> 00:12:36,443 There's no talking to you. 193 00:12:36,516 --> 00:12:39,280 You're just sour. 194 00:12:39,352 --> 00:12:43,880 You're an old, sour crab apple. 195 00:12:45,191 --> 00:12:47,955 Why are you yelling at me? 196 00:12:48,028 --> 00:12:50,963 I'm not the one that didn't invite you to a party. 197 00:12:51,031 --> 00:12:55,593 If you've got something to say, you say it to the Pinciottis. 198 00:12:55,669 --> 00:13:00,800 Well, you talked me into it, Red Forman. Let's go. 199 00:13:00,874 --> 00:13:03,365 Oh, no. 200 00:13:05,145 --> 00:13:07,079 Look at us- 201 00:13:07,147 --> 00:13:09,615 locked in a locker room. 202 00:13:09,683 --> 00:13:14,086 Oh, the irony is not lost on me. 203 00:13:14,154 --> 00:13:17,487 - Why do you mock us, Fate? 204 00:13:19,159 --> 00:13:22,060 Okay, you guys, we gotta think about a way to get out of here. 205 00:13:22,128 --> 00:13:24,790 Okay, guys, I've just gone through every escape-from-prison movie... 206 00:13:24,864 --> 00:13:27,560 - I could think of, and I came up with something. - What? 207 00:13:27,634 --> 00:13:31,263 Steve McQueen is a total bad-ass. 208 00:13:31,338 --> 00:13:34,933 Okay, thanks, Hyde. That's not helping. 209 00:13:35,008 --> 00:13:38,569 If we don't get out of here, a bunch of jocks are gonna come in here and kick our asses. 210 00:13:38,645 --> 00:13:41,136 Why did I put a cherry bomb in the toilet? 211 00:13:41,214 --> 00:13:45,014 It doesn't smell like cherries at all. 212 00:13:45,085 --> 00:13:47,280 Come on, guys, think. 213 00:13:47,354 --> 00:13:51,188 Yeah, yeah. Right. Gotta be something we can do. 214 00:13:53,193 --> 00:13:55,127 I got it. 215 00:14:04,971 --> 00:14:07,633 Much better. 216 00:14:07,707 --> 00:14:12,076 Yeah. Now instead of feeling scared and anxious... 217 00:14:12,145 --> 00:14:14,841 I feel relaxed and... 218 00:14:16,316 --> 00:14:18,580 relaxed. 219 00:14:18,651 --> 00:14:20,915 I know we're probably gonna get beaten... 220 00:14:20,987 --> 00:14:22,921 but it was worth it because we've shown... 221 00:14:22,989 --> 00:14:25,958 we have tremendous school spirit. 222 00:14:35,001 --> 00:14:37,834 Go Vikings. 223 00:14:40,173 --> 00:14:42,937 School spirit is for losers, man. 224 00:14:43,009 --> 00:14:44,943 You're just, like, floating along... 225 00:14:45,011 --> 00:14:47,275 on a conveyor belt of conformity. 226 00:14:47,347 --> 00:14:50,111 Pep rallies, extracurricular activities... 227 00:14:50,183 --> 00:14:53,448 washing your hair- 228 00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:56,455 It's all just a trap, man. 229 00:14:56,523 --> 00:15:00,391 Yeah, Fez. It's one thing to root for a football team... 230 00:15:00,460 --> 00:15:02,394 but to confuse the Point Place Vikings... 231 00:15:02,462 --> 00:15:05,898 with a sense of personal identity, that's just- 232 00:15:05,965 --> 00:15:07,899 relaxing. 233 00:15:10,637 --> 00:15:13,470 We're all gonna die tomorrow. 234 00:15:24,151 --> 00:15:26,517 Michael, I have some bad news. 235 00:15:26,586 --> 00:15:30,818 - I just found out I have B.H.D. - B.H.D.? 236 00:15:30,891 --> 00:15:34,088 Yeah. Brittle Hair Disease. 237 00:15:36,196 --> 00:15:38,130 I have to go to the hospital tomorrow... 238 00:15:38,198 --> 00:15:40,132 and get all my hair shaved off. 239 00:15:42,335 --> 00:15:44,633 - So you'll be- - Bald, Michael. 240 00:15:44,705 --> 00:15:48,766 B-A-L-D, no hair, shiny head, bald. 241 00:15:48,842 --> 00:15:50,969 And my hair won't ever grow back either. 242 00:15:51,044 --> 00:15:54,571 Will you still love me when I'm bald? 243 00:15:56,516 --> 00:15:59,178 You could wear a wig. 244 00:15:59,252 --> 00:16:02,449 So, Michael, are you saying that you would not love me... 245 00:16:02,522 --> 00:16:05,389 if I didn't have a luscious, full-bodied head of hair? 246 00:16:08,995 --> 00:16:10,986 Oh! 247 00:16:12,966 --> 00:16:14,900 No, Jackie. 248 00:16:14,968 --> 00:16:17,664 I would love you even more. 249 00:16:17,738 --> 00:16:19,672 You know, I would shave off my hair... 250 00:16:19,740 --> 00:16:21,674 and paste it to your head. 251 00:16:27,481 --> 00:16:30,609 Michael, that's beautiful. 252 00:16:34,855 --> 00:16:36,789 Nice job. 253 00:16:36,857 --> 00:16:39,587 Thanks. That was a test, right? 254 00:16:39,659 --> 00:16:43,151 'Cause bald chicks are gross. 255 00:16:47,167 --> 00:16:49,101 Look at that. 256 00:16:49,169 --> 00:16:51,763 They closed the blinds, so we couldn't see the party. 257 00:16:51,838 --> 00:16:54,102 - But I can hear them. 258 00:16:54,174 --> 00:16:58,736 I can hear you, Bob and Midge! I can hear your party! 259 00:17:00,614 --> 00:17:03,208 Ooh. Kitty and Red. 260 00:17:03,283 --> 00:17:05,877 We've very busy in here. 261 00:17:05,952 --> 00:17:09,115 Yes, we're very busy. We'll talk tomorrow. 262 00:17:09,189 --> 00:17:12,818 You're having a party, and you didn't invite us. 263 00:17:12,893 --> 00:17:14,884 And I thought we were friends, and we're not. 264 00:17:14,961 --> 00:17:16,952 And I'll tell you something else. 265 00:17:21,501 --> 00:17:23,731 You're naked. 266 00:17:23,804 --> 00:17:27,535 You have no clothes on. Why don't you have any clothes on? 267 00:17:27,607 --> 00:17:31,407 Well, we're having a nudist party with our fellow nudists. 268 00:17:31,478 --> 00:17:34,777 We're, uh, nudists. 269 00:17:37,150 --> 00:17:39,084 And we're not. 270 00:17:41,988 --> 00:17:45,082 So, you didn't invite us. 271 00:17:45,158 --> 00:17:49,026 So, thank you. 272 00:17:49,095 --> 00:17:51,529 Come on, Red. Let's go. 273 00:17:51,598 --> 00:17:55,090 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, Kitty. What are you saying? 274 00:17:55,168 --> 00:17:58,035 You really wanted to attend this party. 275 00:17:58,104 --> 00:18:00,868 - Stop it, Red. - No, no, no, no. 276 00:18:00,941 --> 00:18:05,503 Now get in there and have yourself a good old naked time, huh? 277 00:18:05,579 --> 00:18:07,911 Who knows? They might play Twister. Could be fun. 278 00:18:19,626 --> 00:18:24,461 Okay, guys, they can't be mad at us now. 279 00:18:24,531 --> 00:18:28,058 Yeah, Fez, I don't think that's gonna help. 280 00:18:28,134 --> 00:18:31,467 - All right, here they come. 281 00:18:31,538 --> 00:18:34,564 Okay, you guys, here's the plan. Fez, you beg for mercy in broken English. 282 00:18:34,641 --> 00:18:37,075 Hyde, you insist that this whole thing was a big setup. 283 00:18:37,143 --> 00:18:39,873 And I'll just curl up in the fetal position and think about pancakes. 284 00:18:41,147 --> 00:18:43,240 - Got it. - Got it. 285 00:18:46,987 --> 00:18:49,581 Oh, my God. We're in the girls' locker room. 286 00:18:49,656 --> 00:18:53,251 Yeah. They're girls. 287 00:18:53,326 --> 00:18:57,695 Phew! And I thought we were going to get beaten up for sure. 288 00:19:01,134 --> 00:19:03,796 Hey, baby. 289 00:19:15,815 --> 00:19:18,443 - Hi, Kelso. - Hi, Tiffany. 290 00:19:18,518 --> 00:19:22,284 I'm so glad I ran into you. I've been meaning to ask you something. 291 00:19:22,355 --> 00:19:25,916 - Yeah? What's that? - Will you take me back to your house and make out with me? 292 00:19:28,461 --> 00:19:30,554 Well, l- 293 00:19:30,630 --> 00:19:33,394 I don't know. Yeah, I'm here to meetJackie, so- 294 00:19:33,466 --> 00:19:36,401 I promise she'll never find out. 295 00:19:36,469 --> 00:19:40,064 It'd be an afternoon of secret make-out fun. 296 00:19:40,140 --> 00:19:43,132 You can drink grape juice from my belly button. 297 00:19:45,145 --> 00:19:48,080 All right, this has got to be one ofJackie's tests. 298 00:19:48,148 --> 00:19:50,082 I mean, Tiffany never comes on to me. 299 00:19:50,150 --> 00:19:52,414 But what if it's not? 300 00:19:52,485 --> 00:19:55,750 I mean, let's face it, I look good today. 301 00:19:55,822 --> 00:19:58,416 That new conditioner's really working out. 302 00:19:58,491 --> 00:20:01,756 All right, but the real question is, should I risk it? 303 00:20:01,828 --> 00:20:05,924 And my body says yes, and my head says yes... 304 00:20:05,999 --> 00:20:08,934 but my heart says no. 305 00:20:09,002 --> 00:20:11,971 Aw, my stupid heart's right. 306 00:20:12,038 --> 00:20:15,599 I can't. I mean, I appreciate the offer and all... 307 00:20:15,675 --> 00:20:18,439 'cause you're, like, really hot... 308 00:20:18,511 --> 00:20:24,279 but the only girl I want to make out with is Jackie, so- 309 00:20:24,351 --> 00:20:27,184 Oh, Michael, you did it! You did it! You passed the last test! 310 00:20:27,253 --> 00:20:30,279 - Did you believe me, Michael? - Yeah, sure. 311 00:20:30,357 --> 00:20:32,587 Oh, good, because I'm in drama club, and I really want- 312 00:20:32,659 --> 00:20:35,025 Yeah, thank you, Tiffany, bye-bye. 313 00:20:35,095 --> 00:20:39,794 Michael, now I know I can honestly trust you with all my heart. 314 00:20:39,866 --> 00:20:42,027 Ooh! 315 00:20:42,102 --> 00:20:44,127 Um- 316 00:20:44,204 --> 00:20:46,798 Jackie... 317 00:20:46,873 --> 00:20:49,467 Donna told me about the test. 318 00:20:49,542 --> 00:20:53,979 So I knew what was going on, and I didn't say anything. 319 00:20:54,047 --> 00:20:56,311 So maybe I don't deserve to be with you... 320 00:20:56,383 --> 00:20:59,648 because that wasn't very honest of me. 321 00:20:59,719 --> 00:21:02,017 But telling me that was. 322 00:21:03,223 --> 00:21:05,919 Damn. 323 00:21:05,992 --> 00:21:09,621 You're right. So you'll take me back? 324 00:21:09,696 --> 00:21:11,664 Yeah, Michael. 325 00:21:15,668 --> 00:21:18,933 I love you, Jackie Burkhart. 326 00:21:19,005 --> 00:21:22,736 I love you too, Michael Kelso. 327 00:21:44,697 --> 00:21:46,858 What the hell happened to you guys? 328 00:21:46,933 --> 00:21:49,458 We got beaten up. 329 00:21:49,536 --> 00:21:51,470 By men. 330 00:21:51,538 --> 00:21:53,938 By big, strong men. 331 00:21:55,542 --> 00:21:58,978 Hey, guys, as I was getting beaten... 332 00:21:59,045 --> 00:22:01,172 I think I got to second base.