1 00:00:04,052 --> 00:00:06,478 Gooood morning. - Try good 13:30. 2 00:00:08,068 --> 00:00:11,862 I'm just so worn out from carrying around all this tip money. Here you go, mom. 3 00:00:12,143 --> 00:00:15,107 Why don't you, kick up the thermostat couple deegres on me. 4 00:00:16,749 --> 00:00:22,049 Well, thank you honey. And you have been such a big help working yourself nearly to death. I made you 5 00:00:22,264 --> 00:00:26,269 your special sandwich. - Oooh, "the Eric McSweady". 6 00:00:28,676 --> 00:00:31,204 It's a regular sandwich. Hold the masculinity. 7 00:00:34,289 --> 00:00:37,760 It's almost time for Red's doctors appointment. I have to iron his underware. 8 00:00:39,919 --> 00:00:44,350 No crust, check, extra jelly, check. My mommy loves me. Check. 9 00:00:47,483 --> 00:00:54,441 Eric, wow you look beat. - Yeah, I was working until like 1:00 last night. - Oh, my poor baby. 10 00:00:55,665 --> 00:00:57,098 I know something that will cheer you up. 11 00:00:57,754 --> 00:01:02,114 Today, I got my first bridal magazine. 12 00:01:04,693 --> 00:01:06,928 We can spend the whole afternoon talking about wedding stuff. 13 00:01:08,836 --> 00:01:12,197 Like, the groomsmen can wear kilts. 14 00:01:13,847 --> 00:01:18,063 Donna, you know how much I'd love to spend 4-5 hours talking about the wedding, 15 00:01:18,407 --> 00:01:25,330 or clothes, or clothes for the wedding, but, God I'm so beat from last night. 16 00:01:26,583 --> 00:01:31,369 Okay. Why don't you go back to bad, and I'll crawl up with you after class, but this time 17 00:01:31,611 --> 00:01:35,725 sweep the bed for GI Joes, cause that last thing that happened that was unpleasant. 18 00:01:45,216 --> 00:01:48,025 Life is a cabaret, my friend! 19 00:01:49,458 --> 00:01:53,183 You didn't work untill 1:00. We got off at 22:00 and played poker. 20 00:01:53,420 --> 00:01:56,623 Hyde, let's not wear ourselves down with the truth here. 21 00:01:58,013 --> 00:02:02,097 When I started working full time, I thought that my life was gonna be a total grind, 22 00:02:02,319 --> 00:02:05,290 but my mom, Donna, they can't do enaugh for me. 23 00:02:05,551 --> 00:02:09,073 Look at this. Heart shaped sandwiches. Donna's giving me sexy naps. 24 00:02:09,890 --> 00:02:13,247 As God is my witness I will never go hungry or horny again. 25 00:02:14,865 --> 00:02:18,588 Will you please wear the ironed underware. I have a reputation to protect. 26 00:02:20,237 --> 00:02:24,678 Eric, you're driving me to my doctors appointment. Please, put on pants. 27 00:02:26,704 --> 00:02:31,597 Eric is a little tired from working so late, so I found someone else to drive you. 28 00:02:32,593 --> 00:02:34,613 Jump in Smokey, Bandit's on the move. 29 00:03:16,306 --> 00:03:22,201 Okay Brooke. Here's the thing. We should date. - Michael, I'm pregnant with your child. 30 00:03:24,309 --> 00:03:27,855 Pretty much the best and worst things about dating have allready happened to us. 31 00:03:29,159 --> 00:03:31,348 Okay, but we missed out on all the in between. 32 00:03:31,701 --> 00:03:36,174 Like. Okay, we need to spice up our illegitimate pregnancy with a little romance. 33 00:03:37,583 --> 00:03:42,628 I mean, look how much we have in common. You are having my baby, 34 00:03:42,919 --> 00:03:45,910 and I am the father of your baby. 35 00:03:48,243 --> 00:03:51,424 Okay look, don't pretend you wanna go out with me just because you feel guilty. 36 00:03:51,738 --> 00:03:54,152 Brooke, I wanna go out with you cause you're hot. 37 00:03:56,490 --> 00:04:00,320 Okay fine, but I'm not hot. I've gain six pounds. 38 00:04:00,545 --> 00:04:04,275 That's okay, cause it's mostly in your boobs. 39 00:04:04,737 --> 00:04:10,016 See, nature does this to keep us guys around while you gals chunk out. 40 00:04:17,376 --> 00:04:20,593 Okay, let's get couple of things straight. I don't wanna be here, 41 00:04:20,810 --> 00:04:24,328 you don't wanna be here. - I wan't to be here. 42 00:04:26,121 --> 00:04:30,486 Fine. I don't wanna be here, and I don't care what you want. 43 00:04:31,157 --> 00:04:34,148 Okay then. Are you buckled up? - Yes. 44 00:04:36,395 --> 00:04:40,077 Hmm, because the little blinking man on the dashboard says you aren't. 45 00:04:42,806 --> 00:04:48,546 Buckle up. - No. - Yes. - No. Look, start this car 46 00:04:48,747 --> 00:04:53,065 or I'm gonna pack you in the crate, take you down to the port and trade you for a year supply of bananas. 47 00:05:02,040 --> 00:05:04,454 Hey. - Hey. - You awake? 48 00:05:05,237 --> 00:05:10,914 Well, if I were asleep there'd be six of you all making out with yourselves. 49 00:05:14,730 --> 00:05:17,452 Can't belive how late you must stay at the restaurant. - Well, you know 50 00:05:17,707 --> 00:05:20,910 that grated cheese you like so much? Gets grated the night before. 51 00:05:21,141 --> 00:05:26,390 Yeah, little thing we like to call "prep", so. - I love it when you use restourant talk. 52 00:05:28,961 --> 00:05:34,381 Donna, I have to warn you, I'm exhausted. So, you're gonna have to do all the work. 53 00:05:37,473 --> 00:05:39,594 Why should today be any different? 54 00:05:51,024 --> 00:05:54,965 I need to know what to do on a first date with a women who is carrying my child? 55 00:05:57,147 --> 00:05:59,169 Hold her while she weeps. 56 00:06:01,043 --> 00:06:04,868 Hey wait, what if you guys came to dinner with me and Brooke? It would make easier to find stuff 57 00:06:05,121 --> 00:06:08,906 to talk about. - No, no man, there is no way I'm going on a date with your ex girlfriend 58 00:06:09,142 --> 00:06:11,043 who is now my girlfiend, and your new girlfriend 59 00:06:11,291 --> 00:06:13,463 who doesn't wanna be your girlfriend, but is pregnant with your child. 60 00:06:15,720 --> 00:06:18,453 It's like hillbilly territory. 61 00:06:21,729 --> 00:06:23,190 I'll pay. 62 00:06:24,048 --> 00:06:25,099 I'm in. 63 00:06:26,770 --> 00:06:30,019 Well then I have to go find something to wear. I mean I'm happy that Brooke's gonna have 64 00:06:30,240 --> 00:06:33,905 a father for her baby and all, but I still have to look prettier than her. 65 00:06:36,542 --> 00:06:43,212 Well I was woken from my afternooon nap by my girlfriend for some afternoon delight, 66 00:06:44,825 --> 00:06:47,586 afterwhich I took another afternoon nap. 67 00:06:49,763 --> 00:06:54,956 You know what I have right in the palm of my hand? - No one wants to know that. Just wash up. 68 00:06:59,111 --> 00:07:01,176 The secret of life. 69 00:07:04,347 --> 00:07:07,998 You know what? I'm taking this one step further, fellas. I'm gonna get fat. 70 00:07:12,960 --> 00:07:16,448 Yeah, I'll never be strong, but I think I can be fat. 71 00:07:17,671 --> 00:07:19,244 That's a pretty thought. 72 00:07:28,758 --> 00:07:32,996 C'mon, Fez, don't be scared. Go say "hi". 73 00:07:34,942 --> 00:07:36,951 No, he's too fat. 74 00:07:38,124 --> 00:07:40,152 I don't know where his face is. 75 00:07:41,593 --> 00:07:45,621 He can't eat you. He can't even move. Watch! 76 00:07:49,361 --> 00:07:51,035 That tickles. 77 00:07:52,571 --> 00:07:54,296 Aaah, something's poking me. 78 00:07:57,189 --> 00:08:01,827 GI Joe. There you are. 79 00:08:02,018 --> 00:08:03,891 What else is in there? 80 00:08:05,688 --> 00:08:06,918 Kelso! 81 00:08:08,577 --> 00:08:12,728 I thought you moved away! - I've been living on crumbs! 82 00:08:21,005 --> 00:08:23,674 Alright, okay. Laugh all you want but all I see is a guy who doesn't have to go out of bed 83 00:08:23,940 --> 00:08:28,320 to go to the bathroom... And that's beautiful. 84 00:08:31,703 --> 00:08:34,154 Hey look there's the "Oaks Lodge". Pull over. 85 00:08:35,007 --> 00:08:37,477 But I thought we would celebrate your good checkup. 86 00:08:37,788 --> 00:08:41,553 There's this pie down at the coffee shop I've been flirting with for days. 87 00:08:42,518 --> 00:08:46,199 How about this for a celebration, I'm going in there with my budies and you 88 00:08:46,436 --> 00:08:49,120 wait in the car. - But that does not sound like fun. 89 00:08:50,722 --> 00:08:52,452 Well, that's how we celebrate in America. 90 00:09:03,942 --> 00:09:05,951 Okay, let's head for home. 91 00:09:10,227 --> 00:09:12,951 So now you're not gonna talk? - Why should I talk? 92 00:09:14,063 --> 00:09:17,088 My feelings are obviously of no consequence to you. 93 00:09:18,328 --> 00:09:22,396 Alright, maybe I stayed a little longer then I expected. 94 00:09:23,252 --> 00:09:26,625 Hey look, how about we stop for some pie? - No. 95 00:09:28,329 --> 00:09:31,818 Oh c'mon, let me get you a pie. - I am not in the mood. 96 00:09:32,749 --> 00:09:35,755 Oh just let me buy you a... - There will be no pie! 97 00:09:44,441 --> 00:09:49,650 Wow, good pot. There's gotta be like 4 or 5 bucks in there. 98 00:09:51,416 --> 00:09:54,736 Yeah you guys are going down. I gotta a full house. 99 00:09:57,322 --> 00:10:01,565 I mean... What do I got? 100 00:10:03,006 --> 00:10:05,540 Why don't you bet a lot and see. 101 00:10:06,594 --> 00:10:10,927 Kelso, I know you think you got a full house, but you're only holding two cards. 102 00:10:12,689 --> 00:10:14,202 So I'll raise. 103 00:10:16,218 --> 00:10:20,308 This is great. It's 1:00 and I'm not alone. 104 00:10:21,544 --> 00:10:23,311 I'm not alone. This is great. 105 00:10:25,407 --> 00:10:29,034 Guys I don't wanna brag but my belt is getting pretty tight. 106 00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:33,105 I think operation "Fat Eric" is well under way. 107 00:10:36,517 --> 00:10:37,843 What the hell are you doing? 108 00:10:39,199 --> 00:10:40,973 You told me you were working. 109 00:10:42,861 --> 00:10:46,217 I brought you brownies because you told me you were working your ass off. 110 00:10:46,531 --> 00:10:50,458 And now it turns out you were spending all the time, we could have spent together, with the guys. 111 00:10:50,882 --> 00:10:53,046 And, I gave you daytime sex. 112 00:10:58,509 --> 00:11:01,405 Alright. Who brought brownies? 113 00:11:09,324 --> 00:11:13,491 Is Eric upstairs? - Just look for the lump under the cover sucking his thumb. 114 00:11:14,907 --> 00:11:19,893 Hey, you gonna yell? - No, I'm past yelling. - What's past yelling? 115 00:11:20,790 --> 00:11:23,023 It's the dark side of the moon, my friend. 116 00:11:24,568 --> 00:11:29,758 The place so ugly if it was a women even you wouldn't have sex with her. 117 00:11:30,748 --> 00:11:32,188 Ahh, that's bad. 118 00:11:40,520 --> 00:11:43,087 How can you sleep untill noon after what happened last night? 119 00:11:43,858 --> 00:11:46,147 I'm exhausted from loving you so much. 120 00:11:47,757 --> 00:11:52,790 You're completely regressing. You lie around all day and you act if you'd be happy 121 00:11:53,028 --> 00:11:55,952 to stay in your mothers house forever. - Look Donna, let me make it up to you. 122 00:11:56,237 --> 00:11:59,290 There's some tip money on the dresser. Why don't you go buy yourself something pretty? 123 00:12:07,141 --> 00:12:08,712 Don' worry, we can still hear! 124 00:12:12,293 --> 00:12:16,865 Eric, what is happening to you? - Look Donna, I'm sorry but I'm not regressing. 125 00:12:17,541 --> 00:12:20,549 You gotta understand I'm the man of this house now. 126 00:12:21,008 --> 00:12:26,152 Okay, who is ready for a Spidey and a sandwich? - Me! 127 00:12:29,102 --> 00:12:34,742 Mrs. Forman, your son is a big lazy chump because you keep babying him. - I don't baby him. 128 00:12:36,030 --> 00:12:38,159 Is there a crust on that sandwich? 129 00:12:38,832 --> 00:12:44,313 Well of course not. Crusts are icky they make Eric sicky. 130 00:12:45,738 --> 00:12:48,328 Oh my God, I'm ruining him. 131 00:12:49,471 --> 00:12:53,439 Eric, things are gonna change around here, drastically. Tomarrow you are getting 132 00:12:53,765 --> 00:12:59,310 a sandwich whith crust on. And no more crazy straws. 133 00:12:59,577 --> 00:13:02,959 You will be drinking your chocolate milk from a standard straw. 134 00:13:05,395 --> 00:13:07,924 Now, who's hungry? - I call sandwich. - I call Spidey. 135 00:13:08,219 --> 00:13:10,844 I call sandwiches you haven't made yet. 136 00:13:13,147 --> 00:13:18,606 Okay, Donna I get it, I'm sorry. - No, that's not gonna cut it. 137 00:13:18,926 --> 00:13:23,425 I've been wearing this engagement ring so long it's white under there, 138 00:13:23,666 --> 00:13:27,337 and a little wrinkly. You haven't brought up the wedding in weeks. 139 00:13:28,420 --> 00:13:30,864 I stayed home from college to be with you. And if I knew 140 00:13:31,093 --> 00:13:34,678 you were gonna act like this, I would have gone. - You right. - I know. 141 00:13:36,866 --> 00:13:39,444 Donna, I know that I'm lucky to be with you. 142 00:13:39,669 --> 00:13:42,315 Hell, when we go out together, people think I'm your little brother. 143 00:13:43,979 --> 00:13:46,533 That's true. They say I shouldn't have you out so late. 144 00:13:48,141 --> 00:13:49,810 You are right. No, you are absolutely right. 145 00:13:51,967 --> 00:13:56,980 I'm really, really sorry. Okay? So, are you still mad at me? 146 00:13:59,442 --> 00:14:02,720 Well, it's kind of hard when you keep agreeing with me. 147 00:14:02,989 --> 00:14:06,382 I agree. - Stop it. - You're beautiful. - I will kick your ass. 148 00:14:20,300 --> 00:14:26,980 So, maybe a good way to break the ice would be for everyone to tell a few things about themselves. I'll go first 149 00:14:28,398 --> 00:14:34,299 I like makeup and diets, and Steven here likes black things 150 00:14:34,551 --> 00:14:37,127 and throwing stuff at glass. 151 00:14:42,757 --> 00:14:46,398 Okay. Well, I was valedictorian at my class, I ran marathons 152 00:14:46,662 --> 00:14:49,089 and I tutor kids in Latin. 153 00:14:53,443 --> 00:14:58,579 Well, I egged the valedictorian of my class and a marathon runner. 154 00:14:59,415 --> 00:15:01,410 Oh, and some kids that took Latin. 155 00:15:04,157 --> 00:15:05,423 This is fun. 156 00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:11,536 So, how do you guys all know eachother? - Well, Michael and I dated for like 3 years. 157 00:15:12,059 --> 00:15:14,069 Then I stole her from him. - Wait what? 158 00:15:15,180 --> 00:15:18,690 You never could have stolen from me if I hadn't cheated on her first. 159 00:15:19,885 --> 00:15:23,482 Okay, wait a minute... - That sounds a lot worse than what it is. I only cheated on her 160 00:15:23,733 --> 00:15:25,527 with Erics sister. 161 00:15:26,709 --> 00:15:30,858 Well, and then the rest of the girls when we were on a break 162 00:15:31,049 --> 00:15:33,940 cause I annoyed her, but none of those girls were anybodies sister. 163 00:15:35,127 --> 00:15:37,736 Except for the two that were sisters. 164 00:15:39,277 --> 00:15:42,334 He brought up the sisters. Awsome. 165 00:15:45,720 --> 00:15:47,754 Okay. This was a mistake. I think I'm gonna go. - No, Brooke wait. 166 00:15:51,735 --> 00:15:54,855 I've been with a lot of chicks, a lot... 167 00:15:56,895 --> 00:16:01,303 a lot... a lot. 168 00:16:02,909 --> 00:16:07,153 Okay, that's not helping. - Brooke, just let me start over, okay? 169 00:16:08,930 --> 00:16:14,062 We might not be a perfect match, okay, but I really, really like you 170 00:16:15,056 --> 00:16:21,222 and I think us having this baby together is like... faith. 171 00:16:21,721 --> 00:16:26,483 Michael, faith is when two people meet on a train or in Paris, 172 00:16:26,716 --> 00:16:29,315 not in a bathroom at a Molly Hatchet concert. 173 00:16:32,261 --> 00:16:35,313 Faith. Man, never use a word in a fight 174 00:16:35,541 --> 00:16:38,118 if you don't really really knows what it means. 175 00:16:51,269 --> 00:16:53,354 Still not speaking to me? 176 00:16:56,577 --> 00:16:58,360 Fine, I'll speak. 177 00:16:58,809 --> 00:17:03,398 I spent all day running your bold, grumpy ass around town. 178 00:17:03,675 --> 00:17:08,876 And do I get a thanks? No. Because you're unpleasant. 179 00:17:14,409 --> 00:17:18,979 You wanna know why I'm unpleasant? I just had a heart attack, 180 00:17:19,236 --> 00:17:23,292 and now I have to be driven around like a useless dope 181 00:17:23,555 --> 00:17:28,524 by the idiot that marry my daughter and gave me the heart attack in the first place. 182 00:17:30,295 --> 00:17:36,259 But I am also unpleasant because I just spent the entire day cooped up in the car, 183 00:17:36,601 --> 00:17:41,940 breathing that mustard gas that you call cologne. 184 00:17:42,631 --> 00:17:48,764 But mostly I'm unpleasant because that's how it works in this family. 185 00:17:53,832 --> 00:17:55,988 I'm family? 186 00:17:59,094 --> 00:18:00,170 Oh crap. 187 00:18:05,462 --> 00:18:09,123 Guys, everything is totally cool. I've promised to stop acting like such an ass, 188 00:18:09,391 --> 00:18:14,082 and give Donna only presents, not cash. 189 00:18:15,084 --> 00:18:21,754 Why is that? - Because presents are for girlfriends and cash is for hookers. 190 00:18:22,632 --> 00:18:27,702 Although... - You're so good I should pay you. - Thank you. 191 00:18:29,347 --> 00:18:32,750 You should've seen it coming Forman. Cause when you're deeply, 192 00:18:32,978 --> 00:18:35,802 trully happy, it's a sure sign you're doing everything wrong. 193 00:18:36,811 --> 00:18:41,610 It's true. Once Steven's unhappy, I know our relationship is in good shape. 194 00:18:42,961 --> 00:18:45,719 Well, then we've been tip top since the minute I've meet you. 195 00:18:48,411 --> 00:18:52,445 Yeah, I couldn't be unhappier about me and Brooke, so I know I'm doing 196 00:18:52,762 --> 00:18:55,947 the right thing. Cause the misery is how God lets you know you're on track. 197 00:18:57,707 --> 00:19:02,658 And how. Red and I are miserable together, and that crazy bastard is nuts about me. 198 00:19:04,272 --> 00:19:09,062 Donna, what are you doing the day after your birthday? - Nursing a hangover. 199 00:19:10,689 --> 00:19:15,519 You might wanna stick to light beer. Cause I was thinking maybe we could get married that day. 200 00:19:16,512 --> 00:19:21,264 Oh my God, are you setting a date? You can't set a date in a circle. 201 00:19:21,600 --> 00:19:24,834 I can and I did. - I love you. 202 00:19:29,148 --> 00:19:32,651 There's no groping in the circle! We made that rule for Fez, 203 00:19:32,896 --> 00:19:34,630 but I goes for everyone! 204 00:19:35,520 --> 00:19:39,858 Oh, c'mon Eric take charge, grab her like you mean it. I'll do it. 205 00:19:44,109 --> 00:19:45,094 Brooke? 206 00:19:45,557 --> 00:19:51,453 Holly crap! That's the girl you got pregnant? She's hot! 207 00:19:55,096 --> 00:19:57,920 Do you think we could talk alone for a minute? 208 00:19:58,240 --> 00:20:04,032 Sure, I'll go. But just know if it doesn't work out with him, I've got dental 209 00:20:04,276 --> 00:20:09,274 for all dependents. - You're funny. - I love you. 210 00:20:11,591 --> 00:20:14,308 Goodbye. I've got a things to do. 211 00:20:19,373 --> 00:20:23,397 Look. I don't know why what happened happened. I mean it could've been faith, 212 00:20:23,898 --> 00:20:28,884 it could've been the Colt 45s, but I do know you're beeing very sweet, 213 00:20:29,575 --> 00:20:33,792 and I could probably use a hand, cause to tell you do truth I'm kind of scared. 214 00:20:35,161 --> 00:20:38,284 That's perfect cause I'm terrified. 215 00:20:38,557 --> 00:20:42,827 I know, I mean it's crazy. - We're having a baby! - I know! 216 00:20:43,556 --> 00:20:46,720 And we have no clue! - None at all! 217 00:20:49,101 --> 00:20:53,818 So, can I call you tomarrow? - Yes. 218 00:20:57,788 --> 00:21:02,649 Before you go I just wanted to say, I don't love you. 219 00:21:03,097 --> 00:21:08,216 I just kind of get nervous in front of women. I blurr. 220 00:21:14,452 --> 00:21:16,495 What is wrong with me? 221 00:21:21,638 --> 00:21:24,545 Hi Roy. - Hello Brooke. 222 00:21:26,019 --> 00:21:30,080 Hi Roy. - Hello Brooke. 223 00:21:31,897 --> 00:21:35,842 HI, Roy. - Hello, Brooke. 224 00:21:38,207 --> 00:21:39,257 I got this. 225 00:21:39,991 --> 00:21:42,120 Hi Roy. - I love you. 226 00:21:43,834 --> 00:21:48,350 Excuse me. - Roy, that's the freezer. - I know.