1
00:00:02,703 --> 00:00:05,369
So Fez thought he was
on a date with Suzy,

2
00:00:05,437 --> 00:00:07,935
and he shot a rabbit
to impress her.

3
00:00:08,003 --> 00:00:10,335
Doesn't he know he could
have just bought her flowers?

4
00:00:10,403 --> 00:00:13,402
Oh, I would die if
you got me flowers.

5
00:00:13,470 --> 00:00:15,735
You'd be lucky to
get a dead rabbit.

6
00:00:17,570 --> 00:00:20,035
Suzy, why would Fez think
you'd like a dead rabbit?

7
00:00:20,103 --> 00:00:23,335
Are you from the
south or something?

8
00:00:23,403 --> 00:00:25,802
No. I think he did
it because he knows

9
00:00:25,869 --> 00:00:28,369
that as a cop, I
like to spill blood.

10
00:00:28,437 --> 00:00:31,935
But I want to hurt
people, not animals.

11
00:00:32,003 --> 00:00:33,802
You know what? This is my fault.

12
00:00:33,869 --> 00:00:36,602
I never should have told Fez you
liked him when you liked me.

13
00:00:36,669 --> 00:00:37,802
If only there was something

14
00:00:37,869 --> 00:00:39,502
I could do to make
him feel better.

15
00:00:39,570 --> 00:00:40,902
I have an idea.

16
00:00:40,969 --> 00:00:43,735
Oh, good. Kelso's gonna
make it worse now.

17
00:00:43,803 --> 00:00:46,302
No, look. Just let Fez
take you to dinner,

18
00:00:46,370 --> 00:00:49,269
and then for dessert,
do it with him.

19
00:00:50,335 --> 00:00:52,234
No way.

20
00:00:52,302 --> 00:00:54,834
Okay, if you do me this
favor, I'll buy you a new gun.

21
00:00:54,902 --> 00:00:56,901
That would make her a hooker.

22
00:00:56,968 --> 00:01:01,268
No. Hookers do it for money.
This would be for a gun.

23
00:01:01,335 --> 00:01:03,068
Hey, I have standards.

24
00:01:03,135 --> 00:01:05,168
I mean, if it's
sleeping with a suspect

25
00:01:05,235 --> 00:01:07,468
to extract some information, fine,

26
00:01:07,536 --> 00:01:09,634
or posing as a
prostitute for a quickie

27
00:01:09,702 --> 00:01:13,435
in the back of a car to
snare some John, sure.

28
00:01:13,502 --> 00:01:16,967
But jeez, Michael, what kind
of girl do you think I am?

29
00:01:19,802 --> 00:01:21,068
Hello, Suzy.

30
00:01:21,135 --> 00:01:23,368
I'd love to stand
here and stare at you

31
00:01:23,436 --> 00:01:25,101
until you get uncomfortable...

32
00:01:27,167 --> 00:01:29,466
But I have a relationship to end.

33
00:01:29,534 --> 00:01:33,032
Kelso, here's everything
you ever gave me.

34
00:01:33,100 --> 00:01:35,899
I don't want it anymore.

35
00:01:35,966 --> 00:01:37,633
Look, Fez, you don't
have to do this.

36
00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:40,366
Yeah. Fez, when you
split up with someone,

37
00:01:40,434 --> 00:01:41,867
you don't have to give stuff back.

38
00:01:41,868 --> 00:01:43,334
You wait until they
leave the house,

39
00:01:43,335 --> 00:01:45,834
take everything they care
about and break the rest.

40
00:01:46,901 --> 00:01:50,766
That way, they have nothing.

41
00:01:50,834 --> 00:01:53,467
Lucky for me I
already have nothing.

42
00:01:53,534 --> 00:01:56,100
Oh, you can have less.

43
00:01:57,600 --> 00:02:00,866
The point is that I don't
want anything you gave me.

44
00:02:00,934 --> 00:02:03,799
I never gave you my yo-yo.

45
00:02:03,867 --> 00:02:05,966
So I took it,

46
00:02:06,034 --> 00:02:10,133
and I tangled the string, too.

47
00:02:10,201 --> 00:02:13,666
Let's see you walk the dog
now, you son of a bitch.

48
00:02:21,431 --> 00:02:24,464
Are those new birth-control pills?

49
00:02:28,098 --> 00:02:31,596
Let the doing it... commence.

50
00:02:31,664 --> 00:02:34,197
Do you have to do that every time?

51
00:02:34,265 --> 00:02:38,030
Donna, if I had the money, I'd
take out an ad in the paper.

52
00:02:40,331 --> 00:02:41,563
Oh, no.

53
00:02:41,631 --> 00:02:44,130
No, no, no, no, no, no.

54
00:02:44,198 --> 00:02:46,097
Never say, "oh, no"

55
00:02:46,164 --> 00:02:48,364
when you're talking about
birth-control pills.

56
00:02:48,431 --> 00:02:50,198
Anything's better than "oh, no."

57
00:02:50,265 --> 00:02:52,298
I forgot to take one.

58
00:02:52,299 --> 00:02:54,164
Except that. Oh, God. Oh, God.

59
00:02:54,232 --> 00:02:56,931
Oh, my God. One minute my
life's all light and breezy,

60
00:02:56,998 --> 00:03:00,431
and the next, I'm shackled
to you and some kid.

61
00:03:02,497 --> 00:03:03,563
Oh, my God.

62
00:03:03,730 --> 00:03:05,763
Oh, my God, my heart
is pounding so hard...

63
00:03:05,831 --> 00:03:07,263
Like in the cartoons,

64
00:03:07,331 --> 00:03:08,529
when Daisy duck sees Donald duck,

65
00:03:08,597 --> 00:03:10,529
and her heart goes, "ba-bo!
Ba-boom!"

66
00:03:10,597 --> 00:03:12,830
But that was a happy
thing, and this is 'cause

67
00:03:12,897 --> 00:03:14,996
you couldn't keep your
dirty hands off me!

68
00:03:15,064 --> 00:03:16,463
Okay, come on, let's think.

69
00:03:16,464 --> 00:03:18,330
Hey, there's only a
couple times a month

70
00:03:18,331 --> 00:03:20,263
something like this
can happen, right?

71
00:03:20,331 --> 00:03:21,830
Maybe there's some kind
of time-related loophole.

72
00:03:21,897 --> 00:03:23,863
Hey, did we spring
forward or fall back?

73
00:03:24,930 --> 00:03:26,762
When we did it? I don't know.

74
00:03:26,830 --> 00:03:29,962
I don't know what you'd call it,
but it's the same every time.

75
00:03:31,529 --> 00:03:34,228
Well, I can't be that bad, Donna.
I got you pregnant!

76
00:03:39,790 --> 00:03:43,823
synced by Sarina
www.addic7ed.com

77
00:04:05,362 --> 00:04:08,428
Hello, Wisconsin!

78
00:04:15,983 --> 00:04:20,115
Eric, I can't believe you
knocked up a girl, too.

79
00:04:20,183 --> 00:04:22,215
I mean, you lose
points for not doing it

80
00:04:22,283 --> 00:04:25,148
in a public place,
but hey, gimme five.

81
00:04:25,216 --> 00:04:26,514
Kelso, I don't really think

82
00:04:26,582 --> 00:04:28,581
this is a gimme five moment, okay?

83
00:04:28,649 --> 00:04:30,548
I am really freaked out.

84
00:04:30,616 --> 00:04:34,848
Well, right now I'm not so
much freaked out as starving.

85
00:04:36,682 --> 00:04:39,681
I'm fascinated by your nose.

86
00:04:39,749 --> 00:04:41,148
Yeah, it's perfect.

87
00:04:41,216 --> 00:04:44,681
You'd be amazed at what
I could fit up in there.

88
00:04:44,749 --> 00:04:46,448
But the important thing is

89
00:04:46,515 --> 00:04:48,148
that you have
responsibilities now,

90
00:04:48,216 --> 00:04:50,581
so you gotta step up like I did.

91
00:04:50,649 --> 00:04:53,648
Look, if you mean you
stepped up on a urinal

92
00:04:53,716 --> 00:04:55,414
to climb out of a window

93
00:04:55,482 --> 00:04:57,448
to get away from the
girl you got pregnant,

94
00:04:57,515 --> 00:05:00,182
then yeah, you stepped up.

95
00:05:00,250 --> 00:05:02,148
Still no Fez, huh?

96
00:05:02,216 --> 00:05:04,581
Wow, kelso, you really
must have pissed him off.

97
00:05:04,649 --> 00:05:05,982
He hasn't stayed away this long

98
00:05:05,983 --> 00:05:07,682
since he discovered bubble baths.

99
00:05:07,750 --> 00:05:10,082
Yeah. Fez still
isn't talking to me,

100
00:05:10,150 --> 00:05:12,949
but I think he's calling,
'cause every once in awhile,

101
00:05:13,017 --> 00:05:15,249
I pick up the phone, and
all I hear is breathing

102
00:05:15,317 --> 00:05:18,382
and the crinkle of a
candy being unwrapped.

103
00:05:18,450 --> 00:05:20,316
Man, we are sitting in the circle

104
00:05:20,383 --> 00:05:22,183
talking about relationships.

105
00:05:22,250 --> 00:05:24,283
What happened to us?

106
00:05:24,350 --> 00:05:27,982
This stash must be
from California.

107
00:05:33,583 --> 00:05:35,749
Oh, hey, Donna. Any news?

108
00:05:35,817 --> 00:05:38,482
Come on, that time of the month!

109
00:05:38,550 --> 00:05:41,682
No. Nothing yet. Oh, God.
I'm gonna throw up.

110
00:05:41,750 --> 00:05:45,016
I told you we should
have gone to Denny's.

111
00:05:47,117 --> 00:05:49,016
Oh, yeah, Donna, let's not talk

112
00:05:49,083 --> 00:05:51,449
about throwing up in
front of the customers.

113
00:05:51,516 --> 00:05:54,582
Ma'am, here's your creamed corn.

114
00:05:54,650 --> 00:05:56,615
I got no interest in
getting a lady pregnant.

115
00:05:56,683 --> 00:05:58,082
That's why I'm celibate.

116
00:05:58,150 --> 00:06:01,982
I thought it was because no
one would do it with you.

117
00:06:02,050 --> 00:06:04,982
Hey, that's, like,
a secondary reason.

118
00:06:05,050 --> 00:06:08,649
Look, Donna, we're gonna
figure this out, okay?

119
00:06:08,716 --> 00:06:10,849
Hey, you know what?
We can ask my mom.

120
00:06:10,917 --> 00:06:12,849
She's a nurse.
She loves this stuff.

121
00:06:12,917 --> 00:06:16,216
At least once a week, she
gives a talk about her uterus.

122
00:06:16,284 --> 00:06:19,049
Eric, I don't want
your mom to know.

123
00:06:19,117 --> 00:06:20,782
Donna's right. There's no reason

124
00:06:20,850 --> 00:06:22,949
to let too many
people know just yet.

125
00:06:23,017 --> 00:06:25,415
Who have you told so far?

126
00:06:25,483 --> 00:06:28,816
Well, just my friends
and this nice couple.

127
00:06:30,316 --> 00:06:33,649
Okay, look, so I'll just tell
you what my mom says, okay?

128
00:06:33,716 --> 00:06:35,649
Okay. Just make sure
she doesn't know

129
00:06:35,716 --> 00:06:37,149
you're talking about us.

130
00:06:37,217 --> 00:06:40,348
Tell her you have a
friend, a Canadian friend,

131
00:06:40,416 --> 00:06:42,916
who lives in an igloo,
so she can't call her.

132
00:06:44,150 --> 00:06:47,582
Donna, I think I know
how to be subtle.

133
00:06:47,650 --> 00:06:51,283
Mommy, mommy!
Donna might be pregnant!

134
00:06:53,783 --> 00:06:56,082
Did she trap you?
We'll move you away.

135
00:06:56,150 --> 00:06:57,982
We won't play her game.

136
00:06:58,050 --> 00:07:00,382
No. No, it's nothing like that.

137
00:07:00,450 --> 00:07:02,482
It's just...
I had to tell someone.

138
00:07:02,550 --> 00:07:05,216
Hey, promise me you won't
say anything to dad.

139
00:07:05,283 --> 00:07:07,615
Fine. I promise.
Oh, this is all my fault.

140
00:07:07,683 --> 00:07:09,916
I should never have been
intimate with your father

141
00:07:09,983 --> 00:07:12,415
while you were in the
crib next to the bed.

142
00:07:19,850 --> 00:07:21,183
Hey, Fez.

143
00:07:23,017 --> 00:07:25,282
Well, I don't think
he wants to make up.

144
00:07:25,349 --> 00:07:26,882
Well, try anyway.

145
00:07:26,950 --> 00:07:31,348
I got your back...
Your strong, muscular back.

146
00:07:33,083 --> 00:07:37,248
Uh, Fez, look, I
got you some candy

147
00:07:37,316 --> 00:07:40,882
and a "Playboy"

148
00:07:40,950 --> 00:07:42,682
and a six-pack.

149
00:07:42,750 --> 00:07:47,382
So you can use 'em in
whatever order you want.

150
00:07:48,950 --> 00:07:50,615
Tell him what they're for.

151
00:07:50,683 --> 00:07:52,615
In a tense standoff, you
need to make the perp

152
00:07:52,683 --> 00:07:54,482
think you're on his side,

153
00:07:54,550 --> 00:07:57,082
even if you're about to
put a bullet in his head.

154
00:07:57,150 --> 00:07:59,849
Don't worry. We're not.

155
00:07:59,917 --> 00:08:01,849
Uh...

156
00:08:01,917 --> 00:08:03,549
They're a peace offering.

157
00:08:03,616 --> 00:08:06,582
Well, look at the American

158
00:08:06,650 --> 00:08:10,183
trying to buy his
way out of trouble.

159
00:08:10,249 --> 00:08:12,715
Fez, give Michael a chance.

160
00:08:13,782 --> 00:08:15,714
You know what?
No, Simpson, forget it.

161
00:08:15,782 --> 00:08:19,281
Fez, you're the one that
blew it with Suzy, okay?

162
00:08:19,348 --> 00:08:22,115
I don't know you were going
to shoot a defenseless rabbit.

163
00:08:22,183 --> 00:08:27,048
Well, if you didn't know that,
then you never knew me at all!

164
00:08:27,116 --> 00:08:29,015
Whatever!

165
00:08:29,082 --> 00:08:31,082
You know what, I don't
care if you're mad at me,

166
00:08:31,083 --> 00:08:33,548
'cause now I'm mad at you!

167
00:08:33,616 --> 00:08:36,448
Fine! Well, you could
keep your stupid gifts,

168
00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:38,815
because now I don't want them!

169
00:08:47,816 --> 00:08:51,215
If you must know, it
will be this then this.

170
00:08:58,916 --> 00:09:01,949
So you knocked up
the neighbour girl.

171
00:09:02,017 --> 00:09:03,682
Oh, my God.

172
00:09:03,750 --> 00:09:06,248
You should've been thinking
a little more about God

173
00:09:06,316 --> 00:09:08,949
before you got into this mess.

174
00:09:09,017 --> 00:09:11,882
He would've stopped
you at first base.

175
00:09:11,950 --> 00:09:15,082
Mom, you promised you
wouldn't say anything.

176
00:09:15,149 --> 00:09:17,181
And I didn't. I wrote it down.

177
00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:28,046
So you're pregnant.

178
00:09:28,113 --> 00:09:31,512
Okay, well, um, okay.

179
00:09:31,579 --> 00:09:32,579
We'll move the wedding
to next month,

180
00:09:32,580 --> 00:09:34,179
and then nine months
later, we'll tell people

181
00:09:34,247 --> 00:09:37,546
the baby came early
because you smoked.

182
00:09:37,614 --> 00:09:40,279
No. I don't want to
move the wedding up.

183
00:09:40,347 --> 00:09:41,946
Don't we get a say in this?

184
00:09:42,014 --> 00:09:43,813
Red, say something.

185
00:09:43,881 --> 00:09:47,146
Oh.

186
00:09:47,213 --> 00:09:49,946
Donna, he's not gonna help us.

187
00:09:50,014 --> 00:09:51,946
Right now he's
trying to figure out

188
00:09:52,014 --> 00:09:54,313
how to get both of his
feet in both of our asses

189
00:09:54,380 --> 00:09:56,047
without leaving his chair.

190
00:09:56,947 --> 00:09:59,780
Stop being weird.

191
00:09:59,847 --> 00:10:02,446
We'll just have to
make the best of this.

192
00:10:02,514 --> 00:10:04,780
Besides, with Donna for a mother,

193
00:10:04,847 --> 00:10:09,446
there's a decent chance the
kid'll be good at sports.

194
00:10:09,514 --> 00:10:12,613
Well, Donna, I think you're
too young to be a mother,

195
00:10:12,681 --> 00:10:14,179
so here's what we do...

196
00:10:14,247 --> 00:10:16,313
Tell the kid you're his sister,

197
00:10:16,380 --> 00:10:18,813
midge and I are the parents,
and when he turns 18,

198
00:10:18,881 --> 00:10:21,313
tell him we lied.

199
00:10:21,380 --> 00:10:24,513
Probably get a good chuckle
out of the whole thing.

200
00:10:25,914 --> 00:10:28,013
Eric, a little help?

201
00:10:28,080 --> 00:10:30,780
Okay. You guys...

202
00:10:30,847 --> 00:10:33,413
Okay. Whether we're
pregnant or not,

203
00:10:33,480 --> 00:10:35,313
we can run our own lives, okay?

204
00:10:35,380 --> 00:10:36,579
Yeah.

205
00:10:36,647 --> 00:10:38,913
And you know what?
It would have been great

206
00:10:38,981 --> 00:10:41,780
if Donna could have had a
career, but things change.

207
00:10:42,446 --> 00:10:44,245
So, you know, fine,

208
00:10:44,313 --> 00:10:47,279
so you'll stay home with the baby.

209
00:10:47,346 --> 00:10:49,746
Whoa. What?

210
00:10:49,813 --> 00:10:51,612
So I don't get a career?

211
00:10:51,680 --> 00:10:54,045
Well, you know...

212
00:10:54,113 --> 00:10:56,646
You could sell
tupperware or something.

213
00:10:58,813 --> 00:11:00,779
Okay, you can just get bent.

214
00:11:00,847 --> 00:11:02,946
What? Oh, come on. What did I say?

215
00:11:03,014 --> 00:11:04,545
That wasn't so bad, was it?

216
00:11:04,613 --> 00:11:07,879
No. I would love a tupperware
lady in the family.

217
00:11:14,980 --> 00:11:18,013
Oh, hey, Jackie, have you
seen Donna? Is she okay?

218
00:11:18,079 --> 00:11:19,946
Well, she wanted me
to tell you a secret.

219
00:11:20,014 --> 00:11:22,846
Okay. Ow!

220
00:11:22,914 --> 00:11:25,946
Hey, guys. Ooh, what
stinks out here?

221
00:11:26,013 --> 00:11:29,979
It must be this big,
girl-stealing turd.

222
00:11:30,046 --> 00:11:32,245
All right. That's it.

223
00:11:32,313 --> 00:11:33,412
Let's go.

224
00:11:33,480 --> 00:11:35,145
Oh, I will slap you silly.

225
00:11:35,213 --> 00:11:36,779
Oh, stop!

226
00:11:36,847 --> 00:11:38,779
Hey, look, Jackie's
right, all right?

227
00:11:38,847 --> 00:11:40,779
If you guys want to
fight, let's go inside

228
00:11:40,847 --> 00:11:42,979
where there's more stuff
to hit your head on.

229
00:11:43,046 --> 00:11:46,012
Come on, you guys,
lots of couples fight,

230
00:11:46,079 --> 00:11:47,679
but there's an easy
way to fix this.

231
00:11:47,747 --> 00:11:49,579
Just decide which one
of you is the woman,

232
00:11:49,647 --> 00:11:53,445
and the other one just apologize.

233
00:11:53,513 --> 00:11:57,045
No. I don't want to
make up with kelso.

234
00:11:57,113 --> 00:11:59,312
I want to make fun of kelso.

235
00:11:59,380 --> 00:12:01,612
Hey, guys, what's up with kelso?

236
00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:03,245
Stupid.

237
00:12:05,313 --> 00:12:08,112
Hey, guys, what's up with Fez?

238
00:12:08,179 --> 00:12:09,679
Foreign.

239
00:12:13,046 --> 00:12:15,045
Okay, you guys, this I
s getting pretty lame.

240
00:12:15,113 --> 00:12:16,145
Let's split into two groups.

241
00:12:16,213 --> 00:12:17,978
Good idea... boys and girls.

242
00:12:18,046 --> 00:12:19,412
Let's go, Jackie.

243
00:12:19,480 --> 00:12:20,913
What?

244
00:12:25,113 --> 00:12:27,646
How you doing, kitten?

245
00:12:27,713 --> 00:12:29,512
Fine.

246
00:12:31,713 --> 00:12:33,012
I don't know.

247
00:12:33,079 --> 00:12:36,078
I'm scared.

248
00:12:38,179 --> 00:12:40,479
Just know that whether
you're pregnant or not,

249
00:12:40,546 --> 00:12:42,045
you're still my little girl.

250
00:12:42,113 --> 00:12:43,479
I support you.

251
00:12:43,546 --> 00:12:45,312
Thanks, dad.

252
00:12:45,380 --> 00:12:48,345
But if you are pregnant,
don't let red touch the baby.

253
00:12:50,213 --> 00:12:53,846
He thinks he's tickling,
but he just pokes.

254
00:12:55,280 --> 00:12:57,879
Trust me, I know from experience.

255
00:12:57,946 --> 00:13:00,646
Well, dad, maybe red wasn't
trying to tickle you.

256
00:13:00,713 --> 00:13:03,312
Maybe he was trying to poke you.

257
00:13:03,380 --> 00:13:05,145
Why would red poke me?

258
00:13:05,213 --> 00:13:07,112
Why would he tickle you?

259
00:13:10,379 --> 00:13:12,478
Fez, since you're mad at Michael,

260
00:13:12,545 --> 00:13:14,478
shouldn't you be
cutting his head out

261
00:13:14,545 --> 00:13:18,077
of those pictures
instead of your head?

262
00:13:18,145 --> 00:13:19,811
Oh, I can't do that.

263
00:13:19,879 --> 00:13:22,811
Have you seen how
well he photographs?

264
00:13:22,879 --> 00:13:25,977
Fez, I can't believe you're
gonna let it end this way.

265
00:13:26,045 --> 00:13:29,144
I always thought you and
Michael would make it.

266
00:13:29,212 --> 00:13:32,044
Well, we look good in public,

267
00:13:32,112 --> 00:13:35,511
but you weren't there
for the bad times...

268
00:13:35,579 --> 00:13:40,044
Like he never noticed
when I got a new outfit.

269
00:13:40,045 --> 00:13:42,612
Fez, just do what I did
to get over Michael.

270
00:13:42,679 --> 00:13:44,779
Make out with Hyde?

271
00:13:46,613 --> 00:13:48,645
No. Just stop thinking about him.

272
00:13:48,713 --> 00:13:51,911
I can't.

273
00:13:54,179 --> 00:13:57,145
Even the hub reminds me of him.

274
00:13:57,212 --> 00:13:59,178
I remember this one day.

275
00:13:59,246 --> 00:14:04,011
It was the only day the
hub ever had tater tots...

276
00:14:04,079 --> 00:14:06,878
And there was this
really big tater tot,

277
00:14:06,945 --> 00:14:09,211
and I'll never forget
what kelso said.

278
00:14:09,279 --> 00:14:12,178
He said...

279
00:14:12,246 --> 00:14:16,612
That's not a tater tot.
That's a tater giant."

280
00:14:19,879 --> 00:14:23,812
Oh, how we laughed.

281
00:14:23,879 --> 00:14:27,612
Oh, Fez, Michael took
me for granted, too.

282
00:14:27,679 --> 00:14:30,478
But I found someone
better, and so will you.

283
00:14:30,546 --> 00:14:34,478
Yeah, don't end it all now.
You have so much to live for.

284
00:14:34,546 --> 00:14:37,911
That's what we say when 're
trying to talk down a jumper.

285
00:14:39,713 --> 00:14:42,978
I guess it doesn't
really apply here.

286
00:14:45,413 --> 00:14:48,111
You know, I'm glad Fez
is out of my life.

287
00:14:48,179 --> 00:14:50,612
Always with the mood swings,

288
00:14:50,679 --> 00:14:53,612
and I'd ask what's wrong,
and all I'd hear was,

289
00:14:53,679 --> 00:14:55,445
"nothing."

290
00:14:55,513 --> 00:14:56,911
And then the minute I want

291
00:14:56,979 --> 00:15:00,011
to watch a game, suddenly it's
time to talk about our feelings.

292
00:15:00,079 --> 00:15:02,245
Women.

293
00:15:02,312 --> 00:15:04,178
Actually, we're
talking about a man.

294
00:15:04,246 --> 00:15:06,278
Boy, you guys are progressive.

295
00:15:06,346 --> 00:15:08,978
The thing is, I know I
didn't do anything wrong,

296
00:15:09,045 --> 00:15:12,111
but where am I gonna find
another friend like Fez?

297
00:15:12,179 --> 00:15:14,212
Look, man, there are plenty of
other fish in the sea, okay?

298
00:15:15,179 --> 00:15:16,380
It's like when you
and Jackie broke up.

299
00:15:16,548 --> 00:15:18,480
It was for the best,
and after awhile,

300
00:15:18,548 --> 00:15:20,746
she found someone better... me.

301
00:15:21,912 --> 00:15:24,712
And since then, I've enjoyed
throwing that in your face

302
00:15:24,779 --> 00:15:26,778
as often as possible.

303
00:15:26,845 --> 00:15:29,078
What was your question again?

304
00:15:30,945 --> 00:15:34,378
Oh, my God. Great news...
Donna's not pregnant.

305
00:15:34,446 --> 00:15:36,011
She's not talking to me,

306
00:15:36,079 --> 00:15:37,345
and she kind of hung up on me,

307
00:15:37,413 --> 00:15:39,478
but that click and dead silence

308
00:15:39,546 --> 00:15:42,345
was the most beautiful
sound I ever heard.

309
00:15:42,413 --> 00:15:45,745
Well, what a relief,

310
00:15:45,812 --> 00:15:47,545
but you and I are still having

311
00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:50,712
a good, long talk
about the uterus.

312
00:15:52,613 --> 00:15:56,445
Man, dodged a bullet there, huh?

313
00:15:56,513 --> 00:16:00,678
Almost had a little dumb-ass
running around here, huh?

314
00:16:02,279 --> 00:16:05,878
I'm gonna go throw up now.

315
00:16:07,112 --> 00:16:09,044
You know, you have
been awfully calm

316
00:16:09,112 --> 00:16:10,545
about this whole thing.

317
00:16:10,613 --> 00:16:12,145
You haven't threatened

318
00:16:12,212 --> 00:16:15,545
to put a foot in
anyone's rear all day.

319
00:16:15,613 --> 00:16:17,778
Well, I...

320
00:16:17,845 --> 00:16:20,478
I guess I was kind of looking
forward to having a grandkid.

321
00:16:20,546 --> 00:16:23,178
I mean, since my heart attack,

322
00:16:23,246 --> 00:16:25,744
I've realized at life is short,

323
00:16:25,812 --> 00:16:27,111
and it would be nice

324
00:16:27,179 --> 00:16:29,245
to know my grandkids before I go.

325
00:16:29,312 --> 00:16:32,445
Oh, that's so sweet.

326
00:16:32,513 --> 00:16:35,512
Well, you know, if you're
really disappointed,

327
00:16:35,579 --> 00:16:37,345
we could always ask Laurie.

328
00:16:37,413 --> 00:16:39,911
She might have a few
kids we don't know about.

329
00:16:48,614 --> 00:16:49,946
Simpson, I'm here.

330
00:16:49,947 --> 00:16:52,413
Where's the cat on the trampoline?

331
00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:56,412
Sorry, Michael. There is no cat.

332
00:16:56,480 --> 00:16:58,912
Is there at least a trampoline?

333
00:16:58,979 --> 00:17:01,445
Please have a seat.

334
00:17:01,513 --> 00:17:03,646
Tater tots.

335
00:17:03,712 --> 00:17:05,312
You know, the last time

336
00:17:05,380 --> 00:17:07,912
the hub had tater tots was when...

337
00:17:09,380 --> 00:17:13,212
Suzy, I got your message.
Where's the bouncing kitty?

338
00:17:15,346 --> 00:17:17,978
What's he doing here?

339
00:17:18,046 --> 00:17:20,745
Okay, I've called you here

340
00:17:20,812 --> 00:17:23,379
because it's time you
two talked things over,

341
00:17:23,446 --> 00:17:25,778
and I've used tater
tots to recreate

342
00:17:25,846 --> 00:17:27,978
one of your happiest
times together.

343
00:17:28,046 --> 00:17:30,545
Oh, look!

344
00:17:30,613 --> 00:17:34,178
There's a really big one.

345
00:17:34,246 --> 00:17:38,711
That's not a tater tot.
That's a tater giant.

346
00:17:39,879 --> 00:17:43,012
I look at your jumbo
tot, and I feel nothing.

347
00:17:45,079 --> 00:17:48,978
I, too, resist your tot.

348
00:17:50,746 --> 00:17:52,745
Oh, come on, Michael,

349
00:17:52,812 --> 00:17:54,878
Fez is a great guy.

350
00:17:54,946 --> 00:17:59,245
He's... he's loyal and
sweet and innocent.

351
00:17:59,313 --> 00:18:02,312
And, Fez, Michael's great, too.

352
00:18:02,380 --> 00:18:06,645
He's pure and strong and...

353
00:18:06,712 --> 00:18:10,412
More man than I've ever
seen in one pair of pants.

354
00:18:10,480 --> 00:18:12,379
Hey, he's not so pure.

355
00:18:12,446 --> 00:18:14,645
He's expecting a baby
with another woman.

356
00:18:14,712 --> 00:18:16,811
What?

357
00:18:16,879 --> 00:18:21,012
Well, he's not so innocent.
He's married.

358
00:18:21,079 --> 00:18:26,178
What? Oh, my God.
You're both disgusting!

359
00:18:26,246 --> 00:18:28,245
I don't want either one of you,

360
00:18:28,313 --> 00:18:29,912
and you really missed out,

361
00:18:29,979 --> 00:18:31,912
because I spent a
semester in France,

362
00:18:31,979 --> 00:18:34,845
and I do stuff American
girls think is gross.

363
00:18:42,846 --> 00:18:45,711
Whoa. What was that about?

364
00:18:45,779 --> 00:18:48,312
Yeah. She's flipping out
'cause someone she likes

365
00:18:48,380 --> 00:18:50,611
is married or having
an illegitimate child.

366
00:18:50,679 --> 00:18:54,012
What's she gonna do when
there's real trouble?

367
00:18:54,079 --> 00:18:56,112
Yeah, we're better
off without her.

368
00:18:56,179 --> 00:18:57,445
Yeah.

369
00:18:57,513 --> 00:18:59,445
Wait. "We"?

370
00:18:59,513 --> 00:19:02,745
Ah, I guess I've missed you.

371
00:19:02,812 --> 00:19:05,012
Really? Man, 'cause
I missed you, too,

372
00:19:05,079 --> 00:19:06,945
and, well, I wasn't
trying to steal her.

373
00:19:07,013 --> 00:19:08,778
I wanted her to be with you.

374
00:19:08,846 --> 00:19:12,811
That's okay. I'd rather
have my friend back anyway.

375
00:19:15,746 --> 00:19:18,245
Do you wanna...

376
00:19:20,380 --> 00:19:23,544
I do if you do.

377
00:19:23,612 --> 00:19:26,379
I do.

378
00:19:58,046 --> 00:19:59,978
We are so lucky.

379
00:20:00,046 --> 00:20:02,379
I mean, it's obvious we're
not ready to be parents.

380
00:20:02,446 --> 00:20:03,878
What would we do?

381
00:20:03,946 --> 00:20:06,345
Hey, anything you want.

382
00:20:06,413 --> 00:20:08,112
And by the way,

383
00:20:08,179 --> 00:20:11,012
when I said you could
sell tupperware,

384
00:20:11,079 --> 00:20:13,711
that was just, like, code

385
00:20:13,779 --> 00:20:16,245
for you could be president
of the United States.

386
00:20:16,313 --> 00:20:17,745
I don't believe you,

387
00:20:17,812 --> 00:20:19,745
but I'm too relieved to be mad.

388
00:20:19,812 --> 00:20:21,245
I'll probably bring it up

389
00:20:21,313 --> 00:20:23,711
when we're having a fight
about something else.

390
00:20:23,779 --> 00:20:26,645
Listen, Donna, all I know is,

391
00:20:26,712 --> 00:20:29,511
we can never make
this mistake again.

392
00:20:29,579 --> 00:20:32,078
Yeah, don't worry.
I think we learned our lesson.

393
00:20:33,479 --> 00:20:35,045
Hurry up, Donna.

394
00:20:35,113 --> 00:20:38,978
You're, uh, you're cutting
into your foreplay time.

395
00:20:42,246 --> 00:20:44,811
One second.

396
00:20:46,846 --> 00:20:48,312
Oh, no!

397
00:20:48,380 --> 00:20:49,878
What? What?

398
00:20:49,946 --> 00:20:52,412
Just kidding.

399
00:20:53,279 --> 00:20:56,711
That's not funny, Donna.

400
00:20:56,778 --> 00:20:59,044
I can't even do it now.

401
00:21:05,046 --> 00:21:06,845
Yes, I can.

402
00:21:10,926 --> 00:21:12,025
What would a French girl do

403
00:21:12,093 --> 00:21:13,992
that an American girl
would think is gross?

404
00:21:14,758 --> 00:21:17,924
It could be anything.
They eat snails.

405
00:21:18,591 --> 00:21:20,423
Maybe it's foot stuff.

406
00:21:20,491 --> 00:21:22,157
Foot stuff?

407
00:21:22,225 --> 00:21:23,857
What would you do to a foot?

408
00:21:23,925 --> 00:21:26,824
I don't know, like...

409
00:21:26,891 --> 00:21:28,490
Lick it or something.

410
00:21:28,558 --> 00:21:30,391
What is wrong with you?

411
00:21:30,458 --> 00:21:33,157
What are you, some
kind of foot licker?

412
00:21:33,225 --> 00:21:36,723
No. I wouldn't lick.
I would get licked.

413
00:21:36,724 --> 00:21:38,323
Oh God! Why did I say that?

414
00:21:40,322 --> 00:21:45,407
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